Whiskers was about to get the job Until they saw his ID photo
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Whiskers was about to get the job
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tagged awn faisbuk!
Oh yay!!! i made it intu deh ty!!! Letz go tu deh tybooteek!!! I heer dey b habbing speshul kitteh ID tagz!!!
Yay! Itz a foar-way (royal) makramay!
*dans-dans-dansinwifftehcweenadnmaicheezfrens-dans-dans*
hurae fur teh ty butik!
Wait fer me! *dansey dansey* I wish to purchase a bottlol of water.
Lookz lyke himz mug shot.
“Hey charlee… cmeer adn luuk at dis.
Ai has nebber seen such hye lebels ob nip-indoosd endorfinz!”
Adn teh rezults frum hims drug test.
Pupils b die a lated…Nawt finx he can pass da wizz kwizz.
LOL pjp! Ai fort taht beri LOlly. “Wizz kwizz!” Neber hurd taht afore …
o.0 dat nawt gud!!!
Whiskers had too much catpuchino
Needs tu lay offa teh koka-kitteh-kola.
nevur!
Datz okay. Kitteh nawt wanna wurk ennywayz.
*goez awf tu fynd a gud sunbeem tu lye in*
am dere such a fing az a bad sunbeem tu lye in??
Yeff! Teh wunz dat moob tuu fast, adn goez up teh wawl.
U wayk up kold adn dark! Teh gud wunz ar wyde an last awl affernoon.
Ai had uh BC (name wuz BK {stood fur Black Kat or Bob’s Kitteh) dat lubed da sun beems. But she only lay wif paws in sun. When sun got tu tummy and gotted too hot, she’d move back so only paws in da sun. Dis went on all afternun. Well – dat is when da sun wuz shining in PNW.
Ans they realized he was a bunny in disguise.
I finks it’s a good foto! *powts*
<
>
At leest hims smyling.
aifinks it luuks bettur dan mai id foto.
Ai nawt gonna shoz u myne
less juss says ai addid ay strateejickally playced happee fayc stickur tu mai id holdur. :\
kwismaz goose came erly dis year?
hay hay hay, what yu doin bak dere??
*gigglols*
I nawt diddit!
.
.
.
.
…..dis tiem.
Juss keep yer hands ware we can see um
Bofe of dem, at teh saem tiem?
ALL of dem at teh saem tiem.
Butt…..
In dat caes, den y’all bedder keep teh margajareetas away frum me, az dey inkrees teh chanses of dat happenin. **slitelee ebil grin**
*mixes up margareetaz*
*gibs red wun foar eech hand*
Nao weel kno zakerly whut ur duin wiff dem.
..Teh camra flash waz scary! Teh camra dude 4got 2 put flash on AFTER he finishd takin teh pics cuz I was teh last kitteh to get mai pic taken an he 4got tht so he put flash on but he 4got to turn flash off once i came to get my pic!!!
his name was Fluffy Camra.
ask him bout that b4 u don’t gimme mai job!!!!!1!!!
No need. Well, we have many more applicants to consider. We’ll let you know by the end of the week. No, don’t call us, we’ll call you.
Oh, wait. It says here that you are flatulent in 3 languages?
Ok, well get back to you.
“flatulent in 3 languages”????
Az teh saying goze, “If Ai wanted tew heer an @ssh*le speek, I’d….” …..er, nebber mind.
Dis foto wuz takened teh nawt-sekkund tyme Whiskers opened teh doar of teh Nawty Barn, Aifinkso!
it wuz fur hims memburship kard.
Forgive me, LOLspeak off–I was laughing before I even read the caption. Someone please please make a 3×5 ft. poster of this.
——–Languages———
-Engrish
–Can talk to humans in Engrish
-Body Language (Cat)
TOTAL LANGUAGES: 3
—————————–
Deh nite watchman am making himz ebening rowndz in Cheezland wif Winkee, deh blak cat ridifyingz on hiz shoulderz. Deh Ty booteek and deh Pi Stawll am shuttered fur deh nite. Deh waterz in deh JanetCanHaz4Kittehz fowntin tinklol and splash kwietly under deh streetlitez. Az hii approachez D’Beaker Labz, deh windowz darken and Igor comez owt and walkz wif deh watchman tu deh Princess Mu Medow.
B4 dey can even opun deh gate, a dark form separatez itself frum deh shadowz and kumz galumphing toward dem. Deh Labz lab jumpz himz frunt feet ontu Igorz chest, asking, “Whutcha got? huh? U bring mii sumfin? Wutz in ur pokkitz? Huh? u gotz sumfin in ur pokkitz fur mii??”
Without giving Igor a chantz tu respond, deh lab turnz tu deh nite watchman tu repeeting himz interrogation. But Winky standz up on deh Watchmanz shoulder, tail up and awl deh hairz on hur bak standing on end. Deh lab pawziz, watching hur kwizziklee. Shii leepz tu deh grownd and streekz tu a neerby tree, wif deh lab in hawt pursuit. Safely up on a limb, shii lukz down at deh lab hoo am dansing rownd deh base uv deh tree.
“Wutcha duin up dhere? Kin I kum up? Huh? Wutz up dere?? Iz dere fudz up dhere? Huh? Wen u kumming down? U kumming down now?? Ur gonna bring deh fudz down wif u, aren’t ya?” deh lab asks.
Igor kumz up tu deh lab and gibbingz him a peece uv baykin. Whyle deh lab b nomming, Winky gracefully skitterz down deh tree and returnz tu hur uzuall spot on deh watchmanz sholder.
Deh watchman went on tu welkum awl deh uzzer noo rezidentz uf deh medow. Deh lab gently snuffloled deh liddlol kittenz adn playfully yipped and rolled on hiz bak wen deh kittehz pownced on him.
Deh watchman gently tussloled deh lab and skritched himz eerz. “U make an eggsalad addishin tu deh medow, old boy,” hii sed. “U kin run and jump and romp heer tu ur hartz content. I’m shur Phillipe will kum heer oftin tu vizit wif u.”
Dehn deh nite watchman turned and hedded home.
{{{PdB adn Lab}}}
Well sed, mai cween, as alwayz. *reechez foar tishoo*
Really sweet, read it twice, I know my Laddie gets to spend time with the nite watchman. (RIP 1965)
When I heard that Phillipe’s lab Lab had gone over the bridge, I had very sad eyes. But then I remembered that in the Princess Mu Meadow all creatures are happy and whole again. My goggies are there too: Sissy, Confuscious, Tippy, Brute, adn Prudence.
{{{{{Phillipe adn lab Lab}}}}}
*rest easy old feller*
*sigh* It nawt bii lawng nao bee four our boarder collee goggie bii dere playin adn skamperin wiff awl da udder critterz. Iz a beri come fourting tu tink dat tehy hazza byootiful playse lyke da Meadow tu bii happee adn wohle forebber!
{{{{Phillipe adn Lab}}}}
doz labs du galumph, duzzent dey.
{{{fur evvurywun}}}
aw, that’s beautimuss. I dint know about d’Beaker’s Labs.
It’s a miraclol! The Gif of the MagicNightwatchman! my lovely avatar (given’d me by jamamamakitty) is back to normal, ok, well visiblol. No wisecracks about *normal*
~
The Nightwatchman stories always touch me, so beautifully written and just the right bittersweet flavor. Thank you for sharing them.
hurrrai!! yoo can has yur abbatar bakk!!!
ai agreez wiffyoo!
Ai’m sittin heer cryin tu. {{{everywun hu haz lawsst a speshul pett frenz}}} . Ai hab a fu in da Meadow tu.
Dis is wun way u kno u is a cheezpeep, adn has fownd ur hoam.
We awl feel dis payn, adn can lib in lub adn lafftur dispyte it.
Or mebbe bekuz ob it. We knoz, adn we unnerstands.
{{{{jeanniemouse}}}}
*leeky eiis woblolly lipz* vury pritty werdz cween.
iz beddr dan u. iz has 11 kittehs in der. *sigh* ai miss dem.
thank you …
{{{{{{{cweenmj and the watchman}}}}}}
and everyone else
SAI CHIIZZ♪. . .. ……. .. .. …. . . .. ..
Gud wun, carotte!
I knows sum kittehs who LOVES cheez!
you still heer, 2M? ai haz finally poasted sum uv my ribbon-winning kwiltie fotos awn teh profile, but! the bloo flower iz nawt a flower at awl, iz wut iz in my troll’s brain. Izzit nawt so pritty?
Himself haz agreed to moar brayne surgeries, az hiz medigap thru Oregawn Helf plan runs out this munf, and we cannawt afford 20% uf anudder half-million munnies, teh splort-recubbery iz teh high-priced at ohsu.
So, tr0ll haz lost 20% uv Himself’s insurance, ai haz lost my healf ins, ahcuz Cobra iz wanting 1200 munnies back to March 5th, and we iz sosososo broke, if did nawt haz 2 paid-fur cars, we would be about a weekweekweek frum beink Amish.
Looked at gas, phone, internet, elektricity bills today, and water and trash, and!
Oh, yes, we iz teh close to becomink Amish.
Sawry, shud take tew teh tearoom, just wanted to be sayink about teh kwilties awn my profile…merinds me uv bedder days.
Pyooter about to be crashink again, gotta go….♥
Beri gud kwiltings… u defnitly has a iye adn a talint.
Ai speshully lykes dat dey has boff ballins adn randomnisity.
Dat is, dey nawt be totally simmetrikul, yet nawt cayotik. Ykno?
Binn habbink tew mucch ‘nip?
(btw, ai gotz a noo lappytawp!!!
Aifinkso… datz wye teh rezults frum hims drug test wer so amayzin.
Amayzink inn wut wai?
I waz up all nite playing world of warcraft with sum guyz from china.. but I drank some red bull to keep awake.. do yu tink my boss will no?
My ID is worse.
Slime and tentacles everywhere…
I love patch kitty. LOL
da camra!!!!!! gimme da camra!!!!! ooo, lookie, a buttan……