
In an experiment to help better public relations… …police are now giving out lolcats instead of tickets.
Picture by: Dan Caption by: JesseL via Advanced Lol Builder
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In an experiment to help better public relations… …police are now giving out lolcats instead of tickets.
Picture by: Dan Caption by: JesseL via Advanced Lol Builder
Dass agud eye deer!
But Ai duzn’t hab a car, an Ai wanna lolcat!
Duz u has a byke?
Mebbe u cud leeb it in frunt ob teh polees stayshun, inna red zoan.
Dey myte putting wun in ur baskit.
teh ownlee fing Ai hab is a shoppin bag awn weelz!
We duzn’t hab red zoans – in TTi peepl aer nawt aloud 2 park ware dere aer 2 yello lienz at teh rode-sied.
Ai did nawt kno dat! Ober heer, dey paynts teh kurb.
Green is short-turm, bloo is handicrappd, red is doan-fink-bowtit.
We haz wun yello lien = sum parkin, too yellos mo parkin and red lines no stoppin (eggsept bussis!) – nawt bein a moturist, Ai fergottid teh red lienz.
Well, yu iz nawt a loud tu park close to a corner in TTI, sew park teh shopping baskit dere. Butt spring-lowd teh lid. Dat way, wen dey put a lolcat on it, teh lolcat will fawl inside adn teh poh lice will forgetsted dat dey gibben yu wun. Den dey’ll gib yu anubber.
dis pixor luks liek TTI tu mii . . .
*Hazza hoamsik fore Oksferd*
if yoo trai jaywalkeeng, will yoo gets a lolcat, or a bloojay, ai wunners?
Depends. Iz teh jay yu aer walking on a leesh?
humm. Maibe yu kud hav a frend illegally park a bus, and get a whole litter?
Naow dat’s an eggsellent thort!
Congrats, anni… we has a perfikt brayd! *dans-dans*
Wud u lyk drinkeez oar noms, or sum obber sillybrayshuns?
*puts owt sum aftur-dinnur wynez foar wen anni gets bakk*
*adds sum likyoors foar doze hoo wants sumfin sweet tu sipp*
*drags owt a keg-o-beer awn iyse foar doze hazzing barbekyooz*
*finishez awf teh drink bar wiff pichurz ob iysee-tee adn lemmingayd*
I can has a Alaskan Polar Bare Heater?
*digs owt papaz Amerkin Bartender Skool Gyde tu Drinkee buuk*
*luuks fru teh index”
Alaska… nuffin. Polar… nuffin. Heeters? Noap.
*luuks askanse* U juss mayd dat up, didnt u?
*gibs LCB a beer, inna frawsty mug*
*jeanniemouse skampurz in*
*callz de merri mausies hu leed in an Alaskan Polar Bare*
*Handz Polar Bare a Portabul Heetur*
Iz dis alrite?
*seez teh polar bayr*
*runs*
*Polar bayr runz aftur angelplume*
*Piks angelplume up*
“O, mai berri oan angelplume! ai will feedz it an hugz it an callz it Georj…”
*drinks beer*
Donot worry. Lotsa beertenders is teh not knowing about teh Alaskan Polar Bare Heeter. Like this one:
*gets owt teh drinkee shayker*
*puts in tuu shots ob vodka adn a littlol rum*
*adds bitturz adn a smidjen ob vinegur (pleh!)*
*poars in a shot ob vermoof, adn anubber ob gin*
*splashez in a littlol brandy*
*peels a lemmin adn a orinj, adds dem wiff a cherry*
*finishez it awf wiff a skooch ob skoch*
*tayks a breff*
*shayks it awl up reel gud, poars it inna tawl glass*
*hands it tu LCB*
*tayks bakk teh beer, tawssez it daon teh hach*
*uuurrp!* ahhh!
kthxnowwasthatsohard?
BTW, I already drinked the beer. I think u hads backwarsh there.
Gakk! *barfs*
*grabs a fresh frawsty mug, pumps teh tap, fills teh mug*
*glugga-glugga-glugga-ahhh* Datz betterer.
ROFL
wif awl teh cryme dis wuld bee a fasst wai tu fynd hoams fur awl teh sheltur kittehs.
Wayr duz ai park tu gets wun ob dem??!!
*kwikly parks illegally*
Darn! Ai wuz gonna tayk dat (non-)spot!
*goez serching for anubber red zoan*
Cheeper, sure, until yu goes to buy teh kibble and gushifuds an lidderbawks an
Werf ebbree pennee!
Besydz, wud u razzer teh muneez wented tu teh koarts, oar tu teh pet supply peepls? U payz eeber way, but teh muneez duz moar gud!
Troo, teh parkin tikkits mite be cheeper inna lawng run. But den parkin tikkits wudnt maek u LOL, an a LOLcat wud.
If u parked illegally on purpose to get moar lolcats, would that make u a rekitivist?
Ai finkso it wud maek u a offishul krazy kat ladee (awr a krazy kat gai, iff u is of teh mael purrsooayshun).
That’s why I only has teh two kittehs. I is too good of a driver and parker. *nods*
Wich ob teh kittehs wur yu gibbon, adn which did yu… discobber?
Pawnalty Charge Kitteh? (Will make sense in teh Yu Kay.)
Iz tiem fur mai dinnur! Bakk affer Ai haz nommed!
Boan apperteef!
Is good for me!
dis mite impruv publik reelayshuns, butt butt aifinks is nawt gonna has a gud effekt on cryme.
This must be due to a claws in the local parking rules…
Also due to anti-litter rules the cat has to be fixed…
U R A Berri responsibul lolcat ownur!
We haz bearly scratched da surface of dis subject!
Weel need moar den dis tynee shred ob ebidenss, tho.
yesh, wii will biiz needink a shed-loadd obb teh ebidenssess…
*luuks foar claws-relayted pun, fayls*
*rips sumfing frum tudayz hedlynes, adds it tu teh pun-run*
After all of this, I think that we should
Scratch this line of enquiry…
…Especiallee th3 subordinate clause…
Foar wun ub de MAJUR offensus (speedun oar such) duz dey gib u wun ub doze ejyptyan hareless kittehs?
Oanly in warm klymits.
Wud be crool tu leeb dem awn teh cars inna snostoarm.
Dis is how krazy kitteh ladeez get dere start!1!
heers teh burfday fairy to say HAPPEE BURFDAY to HobieCat an Zaleigh an evreewun else hoo haz a burfday today! i haz bringd yummy sordid cuppie caeks wif fansee frostings, iskreem, frooty fizzy party punch, noyzemakers, an the tradishunal sunnyday game ob trol-hed crokay! teh crokay balls are paynted to luk like troll heds, an wen yoo WHAKK tehm wif teh crokay mallet tehy say silly trol-y fings! an also goodie bags filled wif bownsy balls taht lite up wen tehy bownse, sekrit decoder mood ringz an sekrit notebuks for writing sekrit codes in, kandee, an shiny alien stikkers wif googly eyes!
an a big swish ob teh burfday wand to making all yor burfday wishes come troo!
———-***¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭****
Happy burfingday, HobieCat an Zaleigh!
*goez owt tu teh krokay feel, grabs a mallit*
*tayks a bawl frum teh rakk, gibs it a whakk*
*WHAKK!* ………… …… … … … … .. .. .. . . .o
Teh bebbeh-tawk is kyoot inna lol, but tuu much inna kommints!
Bebbeh-tawk? Whut bebbeh-tawk? Dis is hao ai alwayz tawks.
Has u ebber hurd a kitteh tawk enny obber way?
Mebbe ai gets a bettur ideya iffn ai whakks it agen.
*WHAKK!* ………… …… … … … … .. .. .. . . .o
Ai is gettin a heddayk tryin tu reed dis. Tawk normul alreddy!
Oh, u meen tawk lyke wyld kittehs? U unnerstands dat?
Otay… mew mrow-row mew, mmmrrrroww rrraawwk-k-k-hisssss!
Did u unnerstands dat?
*reelyzes she is tawkin tu a wuuden bawl*
*luuks leff adn ryte*
*akts kazhyooul*
*tayks anobber bawl frum teh rakk, gibs it a whakk*
*WHAKK!* ………… …… … … … … .. .. .. . . .o
Ai nawt red teh obber kommints… duz u kno datz a goose, nawt a dukk?
*has an ideya*
*ayms teh sekkund bawl at teh furstest bawl*
*WHAKK!* ………… …… … … o!krak!… … .. .. .. . . .o
Has ennybuddy sed dat !krak! U is awl a bunch ob stoopy idjits?!
*luuks ober at teh rakk ob troll-hedd bawls*
*hangs up teh mallit, wawks away*
aifinksew datt datt iz an eggsalad eyedeeya!
wayt…iff ai iz reedink dis rite, dey gibz yoo teh lolcat innsted ob teh tikkit! inn datt cayse, den peepz mite bii tryink tew du fingz dat wudd get dem tikketz sew dat dey can has teh lolcat!!
Yeff, dats ryte. So u agrees wiff keshet awn dis?
akktchulollee, yesh, ai duz…
Tu yeller lines in the Staytz meens “Staze on yu syde uv de rodez!”
Yup!
Adn dey goez daon teh middlol ob teh rode, nawt alawng teh syde.
Ai staez awn mai haff teh rode, an mah haff iz teh middlol!
We haz wite liens dat meen dat!
ticket meh plskthx!!!
*reechez intu teh powch, pulls owt a lolcat foar mm*
Heer u goez… ooh, a purty midnyte kitteh! Nao obay awl traffik roolz!
as long as they don’t put a cat on a Ford Ka (british model look up ford Ka commercials).