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invashun plan!
Yu see I wear teh kollar of command fer things of blu. Yu is awl blu and must obey me. Nao, wun of you mus distractify teh goggie. Dat will be yu, Mr. Stripes. Yu wif teh ugly pants, yu will be luk-owt. Duz I have a volunteer to sneek into enemi territory?
Pikk meh! Pikk meh! Uh….watz a terra tree?
Let mee sea!
Ai think that yoo mite find sum terra treez in teh TTI! Purrrhaps awn teh South Coast??
Ai am going to teh South Coast awn TOOZ day! Ai will skout aut teh area fur yoo. An see just waht treez ar there. Maybee akwa treez neer teh wadder??
An if ai am kwite saife, ai will tell yoo – an . . . butt wait!! Teh South Coast iz KWITE long.
Ware eggactatllee wuz it ai shud luk??
Lawng? Iz TTI! Nawt lawng. Prehapz iffn u juss lukk at teh middlol ov teh souf coste. Tehn agen tehre wood be moar treez in teh Notting ham forrist.
LOL!!!! LOL!! An moar LOL!!
Well, itz lawng fur teh TTI!!
*fawlz off chayre laffing!!*
Oh! *sigh* Ai hav to go bak to pakking nao.
Thiz wuz a luvverlee brake fur mee! AI HAET pakking!!
Butt! Ai doo luv teh trableing!
Seeya laydur, Janet.
kongrats, carosue!
tyem fur eh piknik!
♫
If yu go owt in teh woods todai,
Yu’d better nawt go alone.
It’s lovelee owt in teh woods todai,
But safer tu stai at home…
♫
Buuwahahahah!!!
yesh!
Iz kitteh teh chairkitteh of teh chair committee in teh chair?
I wants dat chair. I needs sum chairs and dat wun luks gud! Well, nawt for mai house. Teh kittehs would ruinify it.
Congrats for teh nawt-sekond, carosue! Maybi teh Tai Boot Eek haz some suitablol chairs for yur house. We go adn look, k?
Okay! Kuz there shur ar nawt any heer in mai hometown!
(Aifinkso kitteh’s human izza craftee purrson, oyesh! Makin prettih bearz for kitteh to play wif, adn to dekorate wif loveli grey kitteh-hairz. Adn leavin yarnbaskit on teh tablol for wehn kitteh getz bored…)
Ohia, LD! hauw ar yu?
Ohai catena! Ai’m fine, thnx! Adn yu?
Jus fiyn, tanx!
Yoo play a part in my plan to tayk ober teh whirled!
Ohai red! Talkin ov whirling planz, yu arn’t gettin any ov those tornadoes in KY todai, ar yu? Loud messy weatherz, Do Not Want!
Ohai, Lungdoc!
Wii gottid teh nastee wevvers yesturday/last nite, an I hadda skeered. I’m a beeg storm chikkin.
2day, wii has teh rayne an lotsa windidj. Nuffin too danjeris, fank CC.
O, good. Ai hazza happee taht yu adn teh girlz all be safe adn helfee nao. –Have a happy new week!!
Yah, wen teh wevver got nastee last nite, I frowed teh kittehs in teh bafroom, in case dere wuz tornaydo warnins.
I’m nawt luukin foarwerd to teh week. Stoopy werk an nuffin fun planned foar a whiel.
Lukk forwerd tu nekkst weekend!! Iz teh onlee wai ai can get froo sumtiems.
Glad u nawt had a tawnaydo. Ai coodnt liv tehre. Skerdee cat abowt stawms an nebber bin in tawnaydo, butt(!) in sigh clone (Aussie hurree cain). Nawt wont.
{{{rhsb}}} {{{kittehs in teh baffruum}}}
Next weekend nawt mutch to luuk foarwerd too at teh momint.
I wuz oridjinalee gonna be owt-of-town, butt planz fawled thro.
Tehn u cna b heer wif us! Wut culd b beddur tahn taht?
Ohai Catsa! Yesh – taht be a gud plan rhsb. Pardee heer nekkst weekend!
Teh fing tu lukk fawerd tu is teh weekend – nawt hav teh werk!!
Ur rite. Nawt mutch bedder dan dat.
Fred! You get da donuts.
Ned! You get da milk.
Ted! You get da omletts.
Jed! You get da bacon. GO GO GO!!! I waitz hear and takez nap.
Mmmmm……baykun……
**wipes drool frum chin**
*handz red a shamwow*
Fanks, cween.
Didyoo heer dat Dr SkinCat nawt finded ennfying to byopsee awn me? I iz fwee-n-kleer foar anuthur 6 munfs!
*waives paw*
Ai herd! Ai herd!
An that iz just GRATE nooz, aifinkso! 
Yesh, it iz grate nooz.
Gettin cut awn iz NAWT fun at awl.
Ai wudn’t think so!!!
Butt – donut they frieze it furst? Oar sumething laik that?
Nebber dun dat wif enny of my spots (an him haz tuuk seberal awf me).
Dr SkinCat marks teh spot, tayks pikshur of it, numz teh area an den cuts it owt foar byopsee.
Den, I gets to pacepacepace foar abowt a week waitin foar teh rezults.
Iz teh BCC spots?
Nope. Iz Melanoma.
I haz haddit 3 tiems alreddy – teh nawt-sekkund tiem wen I wuz 19.
Wun ov teh grate burdenz of teh otterwize grate luk ov having teh flame colored hare!
Ai AWLWAIZ wanted teh red hares!
Iz alot to handlol….
.
.
.
….mebbe TOO mutch to handlol for sum peeps.
Iz good yu keepin a close watchwatchwatch so nawt have new spots sneek up on yu, yesh. We getsa lot of melanomas here in NM– more tahn most partz of teh USA aifinkso — but nawt az manee az where Ozcatmum lives. Tehy got a lots. Sunburnt countree, tehy hazzit.
I haz nebber tanned a day in my lief.
I haz been red az ur kwilt skware menny tiems, butt nevver tan.
Yep. We hav tu woch owt beeg tiem. Ai am awlwais at mai bois tu chekk an yoos sun skreem an hat. Blond wun is eggsalad, brew net is “meh”.
Ower scool kidletz hav “no hat, no play” rool. An scool sir plize free sun skreem. Eben nao can stil get bernd an prolly foar anuvver munf.
O noes! Mai dadcat had melanoma. Noe wunner u be nerbis eech tiem. Glad teh nyoos iz gud. *getz stikk an beetz melanoma bakk*
yay!
wut graet nooz, rhsb!!
i wuz just wondering abowt taht, an seed yor comming heer. i haz a happy for yoo!
*duz happee dansdansdans fur red*
Yay!
wen en teh corse uv kitteh eevents et beecoms nessessesssarry fur wun kittehs tu deesolv teh pole lytic ul bondz wish has connectified dem tu anuthur…
Hmmmmm. . .kitteh poly ticks!
Ai wunder hao THAT’S gonna werk!
Hmmmm indeed.
Kitteh cooperationz among selfs for common goalz…Nawt…
Kitteh communicatin wif each other in civil manner…Nawt…
Kitteh doin waht tehy sayz tehy gonna do…Nawt…
Kittehz doin all those things better tahn current humanz…
…oyesh, tehy can do that, aifinkso…
Hmmmmm. . . hyoomin poly ticks!
Ai wunder hao THAT’s gonna werk!
Aifinkso wii hazza clue from teh last few fousand yeerz ov hyoomin historeez. But wii keeps tryin.
Lyke teh fello sed abowt sekond marrijes… “Teh triumphs ov hope over eksperients!”
LOL!! An what duz hee say about thurd marrijes??
Ma gramma wuz marridfied FAIVE taims!
Butt – she wuz just nawt so luckee. Just wun divorse – teh otterz awl. . . dyed. 
Aidontfinkso wii know what Samuel Johnson woulda sed about _third_ marrijes. (Teh second-marrij quote waz hiz.)
But five grampas? Oscar Wilde woulda sed somefing rude about carelessness, aifinkso. But it sownds to mii like yur gramma must have had good feelins abowt teh marrijes, or she woulda kwit tryin em sooner. Yu musta had a lot of nice grampas. Yay for gramma adn teh hopeful attitood!!
Ifn I do it agin, it wud be #3 foar me.
#1 wuz a beeg mistaek, disastur, wutebber u wanna cawl it.
#2 borked my hart reel hard.
3rd times b da charm?
I nawt holdin my breff dat deres gonna be a #3.
**luuks owt windo**
Nope, no menz lined up owt dere…
Ditto
Ditto
Ditto
Ai can lend u wun…..
Iz mai sekkund marrij. Nawt-sekkun wun waz frum BC, butt(!) hav too lubblee bois frum taht wun. Jooree stil owt awn wizdumb ov sekkun marrij…
Ai waz verri luckee; onli married this one tyme, adn we can haz teh 30th anniversaree in June. Mrs. Lungdoc izza verri wise adn patient woman, oyesh. Ai wish for yu teh same kind of good luck in future az Ai can has, okeh?
U berry lukkee LD. Butt(!) u muss hav awlso bin werking hard at teh marrij. Well dun!
Thnx Ozcatmum. It nawt seemz lyke werk. Aifinkso it waz King Solomon who sez “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing.” Adn he shoulda knowed, aifinkso. He hadd seven hundred wifes. (That would be werk.)
Mai dadcat had foar marrijs. Awl eggsept larst wun ded nao, butt(!) awl dyed artfa him left sept wun. Him waz stil berry sad wen mai mumcat dyed. Den him dyed much layder. Sigh.
Ennywai…itz a lolidai heer! We hav a sunnee an wawm dai an ai nawt hav tu werk! Sew wy did ai get up sew urlee???
Happi ANZAC dai!!1! Woot!! (I guess. What does one do on ANZAC day?? Burn effigies? Hang crepe? Pick persimmons? Inquiring minds want to know! But not badly enough to Google it.)
I fibbed. I Googled it after all. Sorry to make fun… it looks like ANZAC day is something like our Memorial Day. **Sends wishes for peace, and thanks for the brave service of ANZ service-persons in defense of freedom**
Iz okay.
Tihs be fun plais. Yesh – berry somber. Teh day waz akshurlee yestidai, butt(!) we hav a day awf ewrk in loo. Mai dadcat waz in teh WW11 an had teh medlols. Awlso FIL (stil alibe at 96!) Mai mumcat dyed awn Anzac Day 19 yeerz ago. Sew mai sisders an ai hav lunsh oar cawfee eech yeer an go tu teh semmitery. Tehre izza dorn serbis an a beeg march in ebery sittee ov Aus an NZ, pluss at Gallipoli, in Turkey, pluss uvver plaises arown teh werld. Iz foar awl serbiss peeps, nawt juss WW1.
wi wen tu teh ANZAC mahmoreal in teh Aleis!
Arise mai minyunz!!!
Go Forth adn Konk er!!!!
KOnk HOOO????
Konk her she said Jch4k.
Yesh!!! but – witch her??? Any her here?
I fink pjperry or the cweemj or Rhsb or or or…..not me I is a he.
Moar hmmmmmmm. . .
Yoo ar saife then ~ teh rest of us – shud runawayfast???
Axe shoe alley, ai phiel just a bit silleh haiding frum teh Konkingbearz wif teh verree sawft pawz.
But maybe we shud just stay under teh cowch fur a bit yet.
Bear wif me foar a moament . . .
LOL!!! ai spoze sumwun HAD to say it!
Ai iz nawt wun to left sumfink unsed.
SOOOOO trooo!!
Oh – ai am traing SOOO hard to resist!
*Teddih-bearz attempt to Konk*
–thub, thub, thub—
Hmm. Theeze stufft knitted pawz nawt much for konking wif, aifinknawt.
–bumph, bumph, bumph–
Littlol knitted feetz nawt kikk verri well, alsotu.
Oh, well.
*Scowl, growl*
Awwwwww . . . sumhao that iz kinda sad.
Poor teddih-bearz, trying so hard to Konk.
(Maybi teddi-bearz can borrow some thimbles adn that one long crochet-hook from teh baskit on teh tablol. Makem more Konkful.)
I finkso dis be teh kitteh’s theem sawng.
.
.
.
It is becuz…tonite we dine….in teh BASEMENT!
Iz . . . BasementCat gonna bee there too?
If he furgetz teh cheezburgers again he wont be!
@@@@@!
Wut if datz ackshully wut teh purriwinkul teddi iz saien tew teh kitteh?
Vurri nomninuss! 
Mai powst lukks liek dem gowldfisheez wif teh bubbul aiz.
It ees time to discuss owr noo bujit.
Is mostly fo cheezburgers.
k yoo bears is time fur yoo tew start pullin yer wate rownd heer, no moar goofin awf on teh innertubes, pull up tehm sox an git tew it!
Hao iz tihs foar a lukkee kitteh????
pikshur ninemsn.com.au/img/2010/news/2604_cat_nh_a.jpg
stawree news.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=1044738
bedder wun ov saym staree – tri agebn (WP#@%!)
news.com.au/national/cat-stuck-in-cop-cars-bumper/story-e6frfkvr-1225858309855
So kewt!!!!1! Must not splode…
(Pulls on CHRGwdoi and HGGs)
ai wanna no if kitteh passd teh breff test? toona brefff?
Was that the teddy bears picnic song?
Upthread with Catena? Yep. The bit I quoted was from the second verse, I think. (The spooky-sounding one about not going alone…)
Kitty looks like he might be leading the teddybear singers in the song, yes?
ohyesh!
*waves paws tew connduck teh kwire*
*Tunes up accompanying band: krummhorn, lute adn bagpipez*
One, tu, free, fore…
♫
“If yu go owt in teh woods todai
Yu’re sure ov a big surprize.
If yu go owt in teh woods todai
Yu’d better go in disguise!
For ev’ry bear taht ever dere wuz
Will gather tehre for sertin, becuz
Todai’s teh dai teh teddy bears have their piknic!!1!”
♫
Whatchoo meanz, yu kan’t heer teh lute? It’s rite tehre beside teh bagpiper. Tell ya whatz, I’ll throw in a coupla pikkolows adn a bass-drum too. ♫Tweedle-skweek, BOOM♫
how bowt ai brings teh ackordeeyon an a cuppel saxifones?
woohoo!
Good I Like It