Good newz: we ate all ur bills & replaced dem wif our cuteness Bad newz: ur broke.
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Good newz: we ate all ur bills &
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The Lady of Broccolishireham
gud deel, I’ll take it!
bills ar awl pleh. Kittehs are kyute. Iz akshulally a no-brainer, eh? But kittehs shud come into teh house fer noms. We don’t want the postalpeeps to take yu AWAI, nao do we?
Congrats, carosue…u has a solo tawp spawt! *dans-dans*
Ai DID? I did nawt kno dat! Kool!
Ai grees.
Me too!
Let us in adn weel tell u awl abowt teh Gud Nooz!
We roated a buk abowt it! *nods-nods-nods*
Um, hassta go to werk…..running late…no, don’t call later; I iz movin tommorow…ok, I’ll call you.
*Installs new alarm system*
Triplol thret: teh tag-teem ob kyootness.
I r down fur deh cownt!
O noe! Teh Cween iz daon!!
Hao long yu bin lion dere?
*Drag in teh CCC bakpak*
*Luk insaid*
Hmm. Wat doo Ai neeed fur dis jawb?
Ai’ll start wif teh sweepee brush.
*Sweepy sweepy up awl teh braynz inna beeg pylol*
*Rinz wif sparkloling lemming wader*
*Pakee pakee pakkee awl teh braynz bak in teh brayn kabbity*
*Fit awl teh braynium bonz bak togedder (Ai’z gud at teh puzzlols)*
*Taype taype taype up teh brayn bawx wif dukky taype*
*Snap awn a nu CHRG (wdoi – Hello Kitteh)*
*Moar taype taype taype*
*Leed teh biktim to teh splort recubbery lawnge*
*Rap inna floofy Cheezmap blankee*
Heerz a chonklit possum. Donut luk at teh kyoot anymoar wifaout purrtection!
*loungez in deh recubbery lawnge*
Oh mai, mai braynez feeling so lemony fresh!!!
nom nom nom deh chokklit possom.
Fankeez, Kemystery Tchr!!
*caper caper prance*
W00t!
*capers an capers an prances wif teh noolee fey maus nightshayde*
*sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff*
Sumthing smellz reelee gud in heer.
PI??? Lemming merengue PI????
Plz don’t eeting mai braynez!!!
not 2 be eetn da qweens braynez.
Dere is teh chokklit pi adn chokklit caek awn teh pendulum lol.
Ufink so? *urp*
Heer ye! Heer ye! This be the Nouns Mint ob the Furred Lunnon Innernashnul Cheezmeet – a purrrr four mint in *cownts on fingahs; wun….too…add in daytoburf…carri the wun…..eye Bfor E…..errrrr* menne parts!
Prelude:
Setting; a bar in or neer to JK2Kittehs’ hoe tell
Tym: Evening
Dayt: Wensdy 30nd ob Joon.
Act Wun:
Setting: Sumwehre nyse in Lunnon, wun ob the Royl Parx, mebbe
Tym: Form cawfee tym til bedtym. Bring a piknik – big hats opshunal (sou’wester an snappy raynhuds myt be mor apro…aporp…papri…beddere!)
Dayt:Fursdai 1th Joolye
Intermission:
Mini-meet fur choklit martoonies, (tho Ai carn’t promiss tehy’ll be surfed bai YNGs) in Swindon, teh follollowing weekweeeekweeeeek.
Act Too:
Setting: Missus Miggins Pye shawp, or odder plaise taht has cayk and frills awn the taybul!
Tym: Teetym (ennetym arfter abowt 4 ob the pee em)
Dayt: Err, between Joolye 26nd and Joolye 29st.
Finarley:
Setting: Sumwehre in The Cotswolds, mebbe Cirencester or a playse teh moddyrators wont let me sai butt(!) it’s wehre Harry Potter wus filmed and sownds lyk a boi chikken havin a lie-down!
Tym: Hmm, lunchtym or mebbe teetym, or mebbe bofe!
Dayt: Caturdai, 31nd Joolye
We tryd to fynd a wun-syz-fits-awl dayt, to soot awl the peeps wot is travlin a lawng way to TTI – an fownd that wun syz donut rilly fit ennewun! So we has gorn fur a raynj ob tyms an dayts, tho mostlee arown Lunnon. Ebrywun is welcom to joyn in, butt(!) nowun is oh blyjed to attend awl parts – Ai canute eben garantee that Ai will be at orl parts, tho Ai wud lub to bee!
CweenMJ, has posted tihs awn the TownCryer. Ai will add in the dee tayuls, wen we dee syds awn tehm (sujjesjuns welcom!)
Oh U iz hazzing Act wun awn mai burf day!! U can haz caek wif meh. Well, ai will haz mai caek heer in teh US ob A, but u noez whut ai meen.
Thats sounds like funz! Can we comez 2?
Wud dey be nownsing it iffn u wuzznt alowd tu cum?
Ai has a jellus! Ai wunt 2 b tehre 2! Pozt a pikshur ov ebreewun awn a dubblol dekker bus fur us 2 sii!
Nao get a jawb so u kin giv us gushifuds!
Too bad cyoot wont get ur lites turned back on
oar stawp teh forcloshur.
oar stawp teh repo-man.
oar stokk teh kubberds.
My cats forced me into prostitution.
So u wented frum wun cathowse tu annobber?
Oh-ho! That’s the first funny thing I’ve heard in lolspeak in months.
???????? Purrrhpaz yoo mist sum??
Tho – taht WUZ reelee kwik an klever – AND ufny, AP!!
*ai’ll try to make dis short*
When hubby was in Vietnam (1970) I lived at home with Grandmother, Uncle, Aunt, 2 cousins. We had assorted kittys and my Border Collie. Uncle swore once the next time the phone rang he would answer it “Hello, Walker’s cat house”. He did and guess who was on the phone?
.
.
.
It was our preacher from church! (Thank CC he had a good laugh at it since he knew we had several cats.)
LOL!!
Yu shudnawt taik taht lyign daon !!
*. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . *
Taht luks bedda !! * Ai shud couch mai wurds bedda
?? *
Ai’m lubbing it! … Doant … stop!!
sofa, sogud!
Wat beautimus floofy kittehs!!1!
WANT!!!!!!11!!!!
Aifinkso dis lol shud habs teh lebel elebenty splort alertifycayshun! berybery danjermuss!
well we all wish that would happen………ecsept the bottom part….
Deze bills kum in teh enbelopes taht likliks demseffs.
Too bad demz bills down’t pay demseffs.
Sad but trew, the credit cawrd cumpnee duzn’t tayke teh floofs.
gudnezz, taht sownded teh bad. Mebee dey cud tayke the sheddings insted.
If kitteh floofeez b t3h new currencee, we all b rich!
awl ai has is goggie floof. whut’s teh eggschanj rayt?
If u eggchanj ur googie fur a kitteh…
u have trayded up! (ai am happehtayle dat teh goggies in mi haus do nawt reed!!!)
butt butt, ai leiks mai goggies!
U nawt haf tu eggschange – but if we eggsepts teh googie floofs wee will hazta lawnder the munniez (hoo noze wear teh googiez haz been?)
leik yu has ani eyedeeah ware teh kittehs has bin??
Mowstly unner teh beds and inna windozill. Adn inna litterbawks… hmmm…. u hazza poynt.
Awwwwwwwwwwww! I don’t even mind.
Kewtee McKewt Floof
Bebbeh Kittehz duz nawtz needz
poastijj 2 wawrm hartz!
Kewtee McKewt Floof
Bebbeh Kittehz lubz 2 shreddz
upz nastee ‘Pleh!’ billz!!
Nastee ‘Pleh!’ billz habz
smoov, slydee spawtz dat feelz gud
undurr Kittehz’ pawz!!
Kittehz’ Poyntee Endz
jusst habz 2 cumz owtz 2 slyss
andz dyss upz ‘Pleh!’ Billz!!!
Jack.
“Kewtee McKewt Floof” – WIN!
Mai Fiona did nawt shred awl mai billz, but she DID nibblol awf awl teh fyol foldrrr tabs frum mai fyol box!
shii defiled deh filez!!!
Whut I’z doan unfurstandz iz dis: How da hooman beanz git kitteez tu stayz still attid tymez wike in dis heer pichur? Ur, mebbee kweschun shuld beez, whut du hoomanz bryb kitteez wif dat ackshully wurkz long enuf tu git kitteez tu stayz putz fur da pichur snapz??
They cud bryb tehm wif ~
Admeerayshun fur tehir antikz
Bedz awl cozzee an sawft
Cat Nip
D. . . .
Deeliteful nomz
Eggstraw chin scratchingz
F….
Fresh sammins
Gushifuds
Hedbonkz
I…
Irree desant sparklee fingz
Jinglee fingz
Katnipz
L……
Lubbelee shwimps
Manee danglee strings
Nommy chicken bits
O…
Onlee teh expen$ive gushifuds
Phethurs
Qwik rollee mauses
R….
Reely gud toonas
Stellar toonas
Toonas. Duz ai need tu sez moar?
U…
Uncooked mousies
Veree gushy fuds
Wonderful Toona…
X…
Xtreme nips
Yellotayl sashimi
Zamboni rydes
Um, zambonis ar pritty fun, ykno.
Has u tryed wun? Den doan laff, k?
ai can has bloo?
dis be da kinda mayl ai’d like tu get
Dere wunce wuz three kittehs uv floof
hooz upkeap tuk plentee uv pruf
Dey nom on mi billz
(dey aer kwite teh pillz)
Now ai liv in dis padded booth.
ROFLPIMP!!!
*barges in*
*pulls cween aside*
*whispers in her eer*
Teh majic number is now: 935
*runs back out*
*falls off barge*
Iz dat teh Silver numburr?
*Throwz a life saver to LCB*
Hoep shii likez candy!
WOW – we be really close tu da “magic” number!!!
WOOT!
*hands her magistee a deep endz wit teh royal seal*
Hao did yu git a seal on dat, mah cween?
I gave it a fish.
Win.
Ohai! Haz tu tel uzall – haz not laffed so mush for yonkiponks! Clebberest repaarti for a loongest tiem! Fankees! Bedda start tu wurkin nao – dedlinez allaova teh plaise. *larst gigglols, sighs*. Kthxbai!