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36. You and your wife have 16 kittens. Your wife tells you she will have 6 more in two months. What will you have then? A bottle o’ Jack and a vasectomy.
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Cheezburger Network Blog
A hedake!
Congrats, OM!
Fanks, Anni – u tu! Wuld u like a nais pees ov nanna caek tu sillybrayt? An a mug ov steeming tee praps?
Sownds gud, thx – iz elebenzies tiem heer!
Is dinna tiem hear. Sumwun wil hav tu get teh fuds ai gess.
BRB.
ooh – is this ur nawt-sekkund taup spot??
*opens elebenty bottlols of shampers anyway*
*sets out playtes of cheese and picklols, can happies wif pate, veggimite tablols wif dip*
Lets sillibrayte!!
Fanks, Nenne! AIfinkso mebbeh wuns befawr butt(!) ai doan mine teh shampers an saybriees. Nomnomnom.
wat a mess! BRB in a littlol wyol.
*eets cheese an pate wyol sterring wite sors*
*cuts up collieflour an puts in larj uvven pruuf dish*
*drops pate in wite sors*
*spilz shampers awn collieflour*
ooh – colliflour in champayn-sauce!
very posh!
I’s going out inda sun to buy taconoms for tonight!
BBL!
TTFN Nenne !! Wi goanna hab a feest !!
Ai brort tihs picnic:
ht tp://www.canneryseafood.com/images/uploaded/picnic_basket_copy.jpg
o.O
sayb sum for me!!!
Otay, isel du taht !! * fingaz x’d !! *
.
.
Wont moar crakarz wib yor elebenzis, Anni ??
Nawt iffn dey haz bean enniware neer teh Vejjimite!
Haff 2 go owt naow – teh temprichoor haz got up 2 5C!
Bai!
Tahts riet; teh beggiemiet iz poyzen tu sum !!
Enjoi yaw wawk Anni !! Sea u layter !! * wavez *
Ai aer bakk! It mai be sunshyne but dere is a berry cawld wind cummin strayt frum Norwai!
Knot nais! Tehre is nor wai ai wuld liek taht!
*snap !! By yu a coak !! *
NoWai !! Tahtz nawt gud !! Tehy muss hab fawgotten tu lite tehir fyrez !!
Aifink Nenne haz left teh freezur dore opin!
Ai fort taht wud wawm hur plais up ?? * Hab tu arks hur..*
BTW, hab yu hurd ennifing frum Mugglemary laitly ??
Nawt shore bout MM – Aifink she wuz awna fyoo daiz ago. So mennee frenz pop in an owt iz eezee 2 looze trakk.
Tummee rumblin – tiem fur lunsh! Bai!
nose – ai hassunt seen hur for ajis!!! not onda buuk of faysis either!!
*hassa wurry…*
Maibi hur wurk pyuter borkt; ai donut fink shi had innertoobz at hoam !! * Finkin ob yu, MM !! *
Juss Googlold MM an her wuz heer awn Jan 4. She sed she had a sad den. Nawt shore iffn dat iz teh lass tiem her wuz heer.
sorree bout dat – we has nashunul defrost ur freeser-day up heer…
Ar Harrr !! * Muss tel Cweenmj bowt taht; shi did it in onner ob the lolympiks !!
*
Cud u point teh dores 2 teh Eest nekst tiem plz!
He should have had the headache sooner.
*snerk*
Gud plan, dat
If onli himz cud stawp hur boifrenz comming tu bizzit !!
Tehy drinc awl his Jak Danyilz, yu kno !! * nodz *
Id not tehm taht drincs hiz Jak, iz m….. No, yu iz rite, iz teh boifrenz *nodnods* I seed tehm dood it. *nodsipnod*
* Ai habbint gawt a drinken prollem; weave gawt plenny rite heer !*
Ai habbint gawt a drincken prollem. I trink an trink an trink an go tu bed an ged up [no hungdobers] an trink agin. I nod eben do teh fallen donw bit eben
Iz taht corld self prezervayshin ??
Yup, bi piggling.
Teh goggie lieks teh drink; iz bezt nawt tu gib him enni, yu kno!
I bein gud. I honly trinkin in cheezland. Muchlt less fatteningising here tu
* Awn a lightur noat … *
Yu in Canberra in teh ACT, wolfkit ??
Ai awlwaiz thott taht wuz teh rawng naim fur a plais fool ob polly tishunz !!
* aw lawgd inn .. *
Ai liek ur Hobbes abbatar, wolfkit. *nods*
a reel good laff… at leest on mai sied ^^
Mummi cat wil hab teh larst larf …
… wen shi runz awf nd lebez him wib bottlol feedign tehm !!
Ono, looks like daddy cat will have a itteh bitteh toomany kitteh committeh..
or somthin! ;D
Paw dadee cat wil bi chaynjin nappeez awl dai lawng !!
Twenni twu kittenz !!
Gib dat man a kokonut!
Ai tuuk sew lawng coz
mi ‘pyuta dissided tu crashai had tu taik awf mi shuz n sox nd stil cudnut addup proplee !!.. tahtz twu crikit teemz !! Boiz v Gurlz ??
Nead 2 moar fur fird mans!
Mumcat nd Dadcat ?? * Huu wontz silli-mid-yawn ??
*
Ai aer still asleap! Ai meened twelf mans!
or twu football teams (soccer…) – mum and dadcat can be refrees!
oar twenny faw gaimz ob solly tare !! ???
oar siks curling teams in ufny pants – (inklooding mum and dadcat agin…)
Kerling bi funnee, eben wibbowt pance !!!
“Wibbowt pance”!!!??? Dat wud bii SKEERY
O, teh horror…
“ICEY Nuffink !! Nuffink at awl !!”
akshulleh – a whole lot wud be icee…
and fings that has been iceed….
Ha! Ai red tihs befawr butt(!) ai onlee juss gawt it.
Butt – no appasble fumbs fore holin bats n balss n stuff wiv.
Tehy cud jus stan aroun nd eet teh orinjez !! * Ohai, hao u iz ?? *
Ohai PB. Orinjez aer poizon fer mee. Not liek tu theenk ov eben smelting tehm.
*I haz teh big tyred. Haz bin fiting teh balck goggie for tu weaks now. Wan himz tu go awai now plzkthz.*
{{{{{wolfkit}}}}}
Iz no gud taht blakdog nd can taek a lawng tiem tu chaise awf !!
Ai hoap yu gawt gud halp nd wish yu gud beemz !! {{wolfkit}}
I can has bluberi smoothy nao? I alredi eated mah cheezburger! Kthx.
datz wot yu get fur marrien eh krazee kat laydee!
Butt(!) ai pwomist tu luv, onner an owbai, nawt be a futtborl coche!
Ohai, ebryboddy in cheezeland.
Ai jus got bakc frum de soopershop and the farmshop and hab sitted dwon to eet mii lunch. Ai gotz frehsbayked rye bred and lubbly butter and strwaberri preserb fur anyboddi dat wantz sum.
Fur afta dat ai did bii a pakkit of pnut buttercups, witch ai nebber triid befoar. Dere ar 3 in de pakkit and ai finks datz 2 menni fur me to eet in 1 go. Ennywun wunt to shaer dem adn sabe me from the tummiakes?
O adn ob corse lotz and lotz of cuppa tees.
whi tank yu, Anemonemonemonemone!
You iz berry welkom catena, butt(!) aifinks dat we must gobblol de pnut buttercups berry kwikly becos my likkle girl goggie finks dat dey is fur her. Ai haz fiyted her off, heer yu are.
*nomnomnom*
du yu has kittehz, tu, AO?
ai bii sendun yu eh frens rekwest. it bii kumon frum ‘azevedan’
Kthxwelkumtucheezlan!
Non ennimor catena, ai yoosed to hab 3 but dey is all libbing in the eternal sunny back garden, I miss dem berri mutch.
I haz 2 goggies nao, itt a long storeh.
Hai agane, catena.
thanx fur de frenrekwest. Ai habe bin in mai profiel and acsceptid. thxbrymch.
ai tryd tu giff yu teh blu linkee tu the Cheez Town Cryer, butt(!) ai iz beun moderaturd!!!
trii dis (pleis tu remoff teh spais):
ht tp://cheeztowncryer.wordpress.com/
it has much intrustun tipz, storeez, adn cheezfrens neuws!
Fank yu berri mutch, catena, ai fownded it yesterebenning and hab faborited it.
fank uou again for de frending, yu is my frust frend in de cheezeland, and ai is berry happi.
*has en honord*
Sownds delishemuss! Fanku! *extends floofy paw to greet anemoneone*
Hai OzcatMum
*wipes strawberri preseb from floof on paw and extendz in frenship*
Doo yoo liek mlik wiv yur tee or iz yoo wun of de peeps dat liek lemming in yur tee?
Neeva plz. Blakk onlee. *taeks tee an sipsipsips*
Ai juss bin lukkin at ur wite goggie abbatar awn ur profiel. Iz cyoot. Wat sort ov goggie is dat plz?
My profiel goggie is habbing meni names, he iz a ‘Parson Jack Russell Terrier’, well dat wot his papers saez. Wen hi is being gud liek dat day he iz bein called Rocky, wen he iz bein nawt gud he habs udder namez, sum of dem izznt gud for de mixxxed cumpny.
Sew Rocky can be a nawty boi tehn? U hav anuvver goggie as wel? Saym sawt?
Yup, de saem sort but dey iz so differint, liek de chork and cheeze.
De likkle girl goggie is berry berry kyoot wen we is out and ebberywun finks she is de gorgus, but she can be de debbil at home, she is berry clebber and gets bored an maeks trubble for me and her brudder.
She not berry impressed wen ai sitz an types on my lapptopop, she saez lapps am for goggies not macheens.
btw her ‘gud’ naem is Quincie.
Ai hav 2 Silky Terriers an eberywun finks tehy are twinz. Nawt eben relayted. An awlso chork an cheez. Bofe bois butt(!) wun is teh “tipiklol” goggie (Sam) finks hez a sheap goggie an teh uvver (Oscar) finks hez a kitteh. Biiig sook. Wuld sleap awn mi pilolow if ai letted him. Lappy goggie fer shor.
Butt(!) my goggies bofe hab de saem daddy so iz akshully fambly.
De boi Rocky is yungerer an neerly twies de size dan de girl goggie who is bein his big sista.
Da boi goggie finks he am a labradoor aifinks. Da girl goggie finks she am a girl. A teenadge girl! Can be moodi!
Butt – no appasble fumbs fore holin bats n balss n stuff wiv.
Just furr teh yung at hart!
Stretez awf Fiyr!
ai lubz dat sountrak!
Yesh! Maks mii feel yung agin!!! “Let teh revels begin, let teh fyres bii started, wiis dancin furr teh restless an teh bwoken harted…”
iz ment fur cheezpeeps, aifinkso:
“…adn hez dansun lyk eh kat awn teh stayrs”
An just wehn izzit tath yoo think yoo gotted old??
We can bee az yung az we want! Ai doo it awl teh taim!
homework kitteh needs…tutoring.
I’ll drink to that!
i thot you were giving up drinking for lint?
taht wus me – eezypeezylemmunskweezy; freewweeekweeekweeeek daon; free-an-a-bit togo!
It taeks eleventy tomes fur Kitteh’s jeeneyology
an moar’n ten toes to cownt up his projenee!
Imajin byeeng birfdae gifts down at teh Kat Toi Marty,
leest sum’ll hav teh saem birfdayt so only needs wun partee.
Good fur him taht they’ll attind Lyfe’s Skool ov Nollij
No wae he cud affurd to sendem awl ta kollij.
Tom’s got teh rite ideer regardeeng parinthood
A clip-ana-snip will dohim a wurld ov tutoring good!
ai lub this! thanks africat ♪…… .. . . …. . . .. . .. ? …. .
Yu ar most welcome Carotte!
Heck, his wife probably IS one of his kittens!
Shoot, I think the momma may need the bottle of Jack!