It wus the second on the left Beat me up and stolen my cheeseburger
gud thing u called sherlok bones (via IHAH)
Picture by: LORRAINE Caption by: Cemal Eker via Advanced Lol Builder
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It wus the second on the left Beat me up and stolen my cheeseburger
gud thing u called sherlok bones (via IHAH)
Picture by: LORRAINE Caption by: Cemal Eker via Advanced Lol Builder
Onnistlee ossifer – dat’s teh wun
conga rats, anni!
Thx carosue!
It was annipus that stole my first spot on this lol’s
Az punishmint, her cawmint will hang frum teh highest spawt.
Wait…wut?
Da floofy one?
yesh. Der is a ton of floof in that picshure.
oh, gudness, such floofitude. Win redd gits hier dere will be trubble fur shur!
*squeeee!* o teh floof!
ahhhhh choooooooo, snif.
*hands Shadow a hankee*
*sneeeeeze!*
Gawt any extree?
heer, ai gots tu [hans hanki tu TBC]
Teh wun dat iz nawt lukkin at teh biktim!
dey ar awl MEEEN! They ate mai kibble AND my gushifuds and they pulled mai tail!
Snugglol snorklol, anyone?
No fanks.
Ai jest ate adn gotta wayte an hour befoar ai kin goe swimmin.
oh wut teh heck
[grabs snorklol adn jumps in]
KER-
SPLASHFOOM!!!But the wun on the rite is verry handsum!
axually, ai likes teh gilty wun bestus
Mom, mai frenz aer heer – lets dem in nao!
dey wunts tu noh iffen ai cans goh owt tu play. can ai? pleese mahm! ai swarez ai’ll cleen mai ruum.
don lissen, tehy nebber cleenz tehy ruumz
Ai muss go an get mai dinnur. Bakk laytur!
Wait! Let us in!!
Ai had toona!
Ai had sala sali mi, ah lunch meet
Ebil hoodlumm kittehs!! Wy iz it teh bad boys awlweighs luk so gud???
#3 plz to step forward
Ok, turn to da left
Ok, now step back.
den turns to da rite
an step 2 da front
an jump ups an down… maybii chezzeburgr wil come bak to mii.
Nao, put yor left foot in.
Nao take yor left foot owt.
put yur lef fut in an yu shak it all ab out
[stolen cheezburger fawls owtta suspect kitteh's shakin pant leg]
[criminal kitteh iz sent tew teh pokey foar cheezburger theft]
Well, dat wuz hokey.
Wut if teh hokee pokee reelee iz wut itz awl abowt?
GMTA!
Akshlee, dat wud esplayn sew mush …
is teh lyne up
Wiid laik to tell u abowt CC…
*snerk*
Hav sum pamflets fur yu tu reed
And here ai fot teh inside kitteh wuz teh witness.
*snerk* gud wun!
habs u herd uv teh CC uv teh laddurdai …
o nebbermynd. nuffink tew see heer…..
Ifn CC wannid tu tawking tu mii, ai priddee shur hii wud nawt niid tu yoosing beri nnoying peepuls tu duing it. Jus saeing
gedda lief wut nawt inbolbs mii.The scene opens in a busy airport terminal
[NC taps NW awn teh showder]
Hello, weed liek yoo tew hab dis flower
frum teh Church ob Cawnshussness.
Wuld yew liek tew maik uh donayshun?
*OW!* *OUCH!* *EEK!*
[duz best tew dufend aginst NW's bloez]
Hay! *ow* kwitit *yeow* [runzawaywifakwikness]
Onoes!! Ai nawt mentid tu herting yu!! Fankees foar teh flour frum yuu an yor consept ob CC – ai rispekt ur bileefs an ur rite to flollowing dem, ai jus doan aksept dat yu shud
constintlee reepeetidlee trai tu pester mii inturilentlisslee sujest dat ai shud ceeing dis fing teh wae yu du. Ai wishis peas an akseptins foar awl ob us. Xsept mai neks doar naybur, butt dats anuvver stoary …Hwoh! Dats eggzactly wut Robert Stack sed. Spooky!
yu wuld preefurr teh burnin shruburri?
Dat wud bee innerresting, speshlee ifn it wuz burning at mai beriberi nnoying nayburs’ hows. Ai nawt wants teh loss ob oar ennee fizzicul harms tu ennee lievs (hooman oar uvverwais), butt ai’d bee beri grateful ifn day cud fynd sumfing tu foekussing awn uvver dan mai lief an habbits (lawng, inbolbd stoaree, moar prowpreeit foar blog [wut ai duz sumdae] dan heer awn ICHC).
{HUG}
aifinks sum peeplol is sew nawt happi dat tehy finks tehy muss mayk shur nohwun els is teh happi. ai hoaps tehy gits teh messaj an leebes yu aloan.
Fankees. Kurrintlee, ai has dis naybur wut cumplaynd tu teh City dat ai wuz ‘messee’, an nao ai gots teh BaiLauw Ossifur wut bees telling mii ai nawt alloud tu hassing teh plantpots (wif perennial plants innem) in mai gardin, cos it ‘luks messee’. Ai nawt lloud tu hassing bags ob mulsh an soyl, wut hii sez has tu beeing kept inna shed. Wen ai puts up teh shed, it hastu beeing at leest tu feets frum teh propurtee lien. Wuns ai puts up teh shed, [an dis teh
ludicrissimpoartint part] ai NAWT gots tu putting enneefing liek teh soyl an mulsh INSIED teh shed, ai kin stak dems BEHIND teh shed inna tu feet bitween teh shed anna propurtee lien. Sew, ai can hassing teh emtee shed ifn ai wants, an stuf [yu noes, teh stuf deys currintlee complayning abowt] stakkd in bihynd it, but nawt innit …..An den, dey wundurs wai wii bloes up der bildings.
ugh. beu rawk roh cee du nawt wunt!
Annit wud bee beri mush preesheeaytid ifn sumwun wud steel doas nnoying nayburs #^%&*$)#)*@& windchyms beri suun, tu. Windchyms bees teh nnoying noys plooshuns – pls tu bee enjois dem insied ur hows, ware nun ob us elsis godda heers dem.
sawry, aifinks yu mai bi livvin neggst tu mai pairents.
Wil yu missing dem beri mush ifn ai maeks dem … um … ‘gon’???
sum dayz, nawt sew mush. mai solooshun is tu libs ay cupplol howr ahways.
Ifn ai keptid muuving ‘eslwares’ ebree tiem ai gottid stuk heering windchyms, ai’d nebbur hassing ennee hoem at awl, ebbur. But moast peepuls has gots teh unnerstandings wen ai splayns tu dem, dey jus nebbur thottid it wud bee nnoying.
ai unnurstands. yu shuldn’t has tu muve beecuz uv sumwun els’s leiks oar disleiks.
teh wyndchyms is nawt teh reesun ai preefurrs tu libs 2 howrs awai frum mai pairrents.
Habbing bin oarfind, doptid an fosturd in mai lief, ai toadlee unnerstands, an noe uvvur xsplanayshun bees nessissairee. Dey wil nebbur gets ur address frum mii! {{{{{Keshet}}}}}
oh is nuthin bad. is juss eezeeur tu gits aylong wif dem frum ay distanse.
{{{{{nicestwitch}}}}}oh, ao noze wut yoo meens! ai meen, hoo gnu taht, eben awn a “burnday” win yoo cawl teh fyremin’s house tew be seeing if iz ok tew burn yur yard waste), yoo cannawt burn a patch moar tahn 5′ x5′? ai meens, after teh nay-bores complayned abowt teh blackberry (yum!) bushes taht wus dere win we rented teh place YEERS ago iz illegal heer tew be havin
nozious weeds” (!) blackberries is “noxious? ai doan finkso! an so, teh nay-bores kep sayin, why doan yoo burn tehm owt, an DEN! win teh tr0ll burns dem owt, (nawt ennyway neer teh property line), dey cawls teh fyre department hoo puts it owt afore they are ded? well, yess, it DID catch a tree 30 feets away awn, well, nawt reely awn fyre, jus a liddle bit ub smoke an embers), an, well, yes, it skorched my applol tree an awl teh nay-nores arborvitae, but…but! yoo awl sed…”burn em owt! burn em owt! *sunny britens!* but…so…naow we STILL haz teh blackberries, until teh sitty fines us fur teh noxious weeds, ennyway…
An! teh b-berreez wuz so big win we moobed in, we did nawt noze WUT wuz unner dem! so, win teh fyremins saw a old muffler, an a flip-flop, an a bycycle wheel rim an sum stuff (srsly, hoo gnu?) tehyreported us tew teh DEQ. hoo reported us to owr lanlady down in Cally…sigh…wuz teh ugly! but…but! him did nawt (sumhaow!) burn down teh barn wich wuz juss 2 feets frum teh fyre, fortunately, teh wind was blowin toward teh nay-bores howse…
Innit wunnerful, hao dey can says “yu mus du dis!’ meedyitlee flolloed bai ‘Gasp! Yu did dis wut wuz nawt rite (eeben dough wii toal yu tu duit) an nao wii charjis yu foar duing wut wii toal yu tu duing!’
Ai swares, ai gunna blo up a bilding sum dae. A Gubmint bilding. Rite nao ai deeling awn teh sitee level, but ai hassing noe prollums wif finking ob bloing up sumfing biggur.
*nicewitch dreems ob beeing nawt-sew-nies wun dae*
*dis nawt hur fawlt – byoo rok rissee droab hur tuit*
*o – an teh nayburs, tu – der hows goas nawt-sekkund*
um…nicsst witch…um? yoo juss finks taht in yur hed, ryte? ryte? oh, ai noze yoo iz okee-dokee…ai haz bin spendin tew much tyme in teh tea room, but! pleez be careful sayin teh fings lyke taht! ai iz nawt shoor we are sekyoor heer, an DOAN WANT sumwon comin an takin yoo away, ok? ok? becuz, ai lykes yoo…an…we noze yoo will nebber ebber blow up a gubmint bilding…but…oh! nw! donut sayso owt lowd! pleez, donut tempt ennywon! k? K/
Oh noez! Ai got moderayted!
[thinks tew self...dey AWR listening...*EEP*]
<repoast>
[conspearyist NC worreez dat gubmint iz listening]
Hold awn! Wait uh minnit bwack helicopter guys.
NW wuz jes tawkin ’bout owr entry in teh Macy’s Fanksgiving parade.
[hands NW uh life size inflayt-o-oblol replica]
[ob
Nawtsee HQuh purty gubmint building]Here, blow dis up foar mii, wuld ya?
</repoast>
Der bees dis feeoaree dat, wut-ebbur wii tawks abaout a lawt, wii nawt akshlee gunna doo, cos teh tawking bees teh rilees dat wii niids.
Dey shud kiip awn hoeping dat.
Jus saeing.
Try splaynin teh “tawk a lawt feeoaree” tew teh bwain ded minyons ob teh bwain ded beer row crats. Jes sayin, deez teh same peeps dat komz up wif teh “yu mus du dis” stuff.
While dey awr attit. Culd sumwun steel teh brite brite motion sensor security spawtlites dat shine intew my yard adn blink awn and awf awl nite wen teh wind blowz.
Yu bees libbing neks tu mai beri-neks-doar nayburs, tu??
[Teh wind-chyms bees akross teh rode an down haffa blok]
whoa! I muss live next to nicewitch and nativeca66.
Sorry aboot the windchimes – I just forget they are there, sort of like lissening to birdies chirp. (naow those bluejays -they bee annoying!!!!)
And I will adjust da motion sensor so that it doesn’t go on everytime a branch sways in da breese.
We muss awl be thoughtfuller nayboors to each otter.
Fankees, lionelcat – ai noes yu nawt ment enneefing tu beeing nnoying, an ai nawt meen tu beeing teh controwl freek. Wii awl hassing diffrint tollrinsis tu diffrint innputts (speshlee site, sownd an smels), an wii nawt noes wut bovvurs eech uvver until wii tawks tu eech uvver. An tawking tu eech uvver offin bees wut turns aksidentul nayburs intu frends, aifinkso.
hmmmmph! my nay-bores wuz teh frens until MY LANDLADY’S walnut trees dropped elebenty zillion black walnuts into their yard, ai meen, this did NAWT happen enny tyme in teh last 8 decades win we did nawt lib heer? an noze, black walnuts duzn’t burn, duzn’t compost, eben teh skwirrls doan want! awl up an down teh hiway in fall iz sines sayin “free black walnuts, yoo pick up” but! we did nawt plant, an we haz to rake them up too…an yes we cut them down, an teh darn trees grue back elebenty tymes as big in 3 yeers! So…
{{{{NW}}}}
Soundz liek yew lib in my old nayborhood. Wii hadda berry cantankerous resident dat cawminted negatively awn eberywuns activities, eben tho wii tried tew bii civil tew him, until wun day ai cawld him onit. Ai simply told him tew go bak inside tew hiz own miserable lief adn keep hiz nasty cawmints tew hisself. He wuldn maik eye contact wif mii after dat. Ai felt bad foar him, but hii kontinyood tew shout stuff at udder naybors. Sum peeps iz jest determined tew bii unhappy.
Is troo. Fankees CC wii libs in dis bestist ob nayburhuds, heer in Cheezlands. Wii gots teh peasfuls wen wii wants dem, an teh moosiks, an teh puhrayds, an teh sailinsis … ebbreefing wii niids, rite wen wii niids it.
ai hazza signs @ mai enterance sayz “NO PROSLYTIZING” oar somfing liek dat, keeps dem awai frum mai door.
Ooooo – ai laiks dat!!! At teh beri leest, dat kiips dem kwaiet wail dems reeding it an trine tu figgering it owt!
noe! wii wantz a nyce shrubbree, mebbee wif a liddlol paff, tew lebblols…
aifinks Monty Python is teh reesun ai leiks teh wurd shruburee.
yesh, an plz tew git teh shrubbree frum Rojur Teh Shrubbur, kthnx
Shrubrees bees teh beri nies, speshlee wen tenshun bees payd tu texchur an rivim. Doan foargit tu inklooding sum soarsis ob culler, sew it nawt bees boaring.
sunny makes up a song, to teh toon uv “yellow submarine”
♥♫♫♫♥we awl libs inna nyce nay-borhood..♫♥♫..a nice nay-bore hood, a nyce nay-bore hood♥♫♥♫
Wii awl libs inna nyce nayborhud … a nyce nayborhud … a nyce nayborhud …
Habs yew heard da gud gnuuz?
CC can sabe ur sole from da eeebil googie! Foar jus $38.99!
+ sh&h
batteries not included
sum assembly reekwired
butt butt yu is ay goggie an yu is nawt eeebil!
Purrhaps I just in dyskiez? Mebbeh I’m relleeh a kitteh in a goggie body?
But shhhh……
Butt eiver way, ThaBigCheesy=Not Ebil.
(Well cept when himz drivin)
Duz yu taeking purrsunul chzeks? kredit? ai-ow-yu’s? ‘majinree munnees?? Umm …. :blush: ….. ‘trayd’??
Maaaaaawm! Teh mirror iz borked again!
heers teh burfday fairy to say HAPPEE BURFDAY to Gibbocat an evreewun else hoo haz a burfday today! az sum ob yoo know an sum ob yoo don’t, Gibbocat iz teh fownder ob the tye booteek, an also teh owner ob a flying motorsikkle!! i haz bringd tasty fudjy burfday caeks, red velvit caeks, iskreem, frooty party punch, noyzemakers, an goodie bags filled with liddle remote control flying motorsikkles, gift certicifates to teh ty booteek (yes, i kno evreefing tehr is free, but habbing a gift certicifate makes it more speshul
plus gibs gibbocat credits on himz re-stokking deel with teh trol faktree, iz complicayted bizness deel stuffs), kandee, an fuzzy kitteh stikkers wif googly eyes! an a big swish ob teh burfday wand to making all yor burfday wishes come troo!
———-***¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭****
Yayayayay! Happy birthday to Gibbocat!!!!!!
*starts up the remote-control flying motorsikkle, does loop-de-loops and other aereobatics*
Gibbocat??? Teh Wun, Teh Ownlee, Teh Lejindree Gibbocat?????? Omigudniss, ai hassa stunnd anna frilld anna ohwowniss!!!! Happee Burfdae TWTOTL Gibbocat!!!!!ellebentee!! An mennee moar ob dem!! O, an pls tu cumin bak suun, cos ai noes der bees mennee mennee Cheezfrends hu missis yu.
Hippo, Hippo, herdstray!!!
[corrals stray hippo adn returns it tew teh herd]
Happytayl durfdai Gibbbocat!
Fankies foar awl teh free TB goodies.
[raisinz glass ob frooty party punch]
Cheez!
[picks raisinz owt of party punch adn gibs tew Tiki]
Happeetayle Birfday Gibbocat!
*duz a liddle birfday dans splashing soapy dishwater about* oops. gawt car ride awai…
biktim smiktim. heeza lyr. he lawst his cheezeburger munnee an dun wanna fess uup. Nao hii gits ozzer kitteh in trubble trubble trubble.
Dass wat Ai fink 2 Mrrphh!
kittehz nawt so gud at theft..dey awl luks alyk
Anyone know if these are Maine Coonses? Norwegian Forest Catses? Miscellaneous Floofers?
Yes.
Jus nawt mii.
Sry.
gud answur!
ai liek taht wun
Aifinkso this wassn’t sew clevur, more like condis… condec… uh… nawt-vairy-nais. The fraze “if ewe donut has sumfink gneiss two say” comes too mined.
HJ, ai sawree – ai nawt mentid tu being nawt-beri-nais! Wuz mai feebul attemt ob teh hyoomur. Pls tu aksepting mai pologees ifn ai maid yu feal bad wif wut ai sed.
Ohai, frenz!
Teh sun is owt, teh snow iz meltin, an teh tempz is OVUR 40 degreez!
Foar teh nawt-sekkund tiem in adjis, I am feelin sumwat “nermal”.
[feelz
upred]Akshully yew feel kwite “nice”.
Ooooh, baby!
I finkso I need a ciggie now.
**pakks plaid flannol pee-jays an heds to teh hareport, to catch plane to CA**
Hare-port!?! Oh noez! The Krishnas!
[runz tew warn dem]
My brudder yoozed to cawling dem “Hairy Krishtuns”!
git ay ruum!
Ai got uh ruum. Itz padded.
Now yew jest have tew figure owt hao ai operate teh keyboard in dis cool jackit dey gabe mii.
Yoo haz sum talinted toesies?
I duz! I kin piks fings up wif dem.
Uh…shuuuuurrrrrr…dats wut ai meant.
[huntandpeck huntandpeck huntandpeck]
**wants to say sumfin involvin “peck” butt duznt**
**runs to NB insted, draggin NC behind hur**
[safely in teh NB...]
[NC pawnder hao a peck relates tew uh bushlol]
*locks nc66 in himz own speshul padded room in teh nawty barn*
I lubs yoo
a bushlol an a pek
a bushlol an a pek
an a hug arown teh nek!
A peck is a kwarter uv a bushel, a bushel is 8 UK gallons ( 8 UK pints of 20 fl ownsis eech)
And they eated mah fryes! And drinked mah sody-pop!
Sekkund kitteh awn teh left: It wuzzin mii! I’ve bin framed. *burp*
Ennywun up foar a flashbakk?
Ai ar noetissing dat teh wun awn teh left hassa biggur … um … instrumint … dan teh wun awn teh rite … nawt jujing, jus, um, noetissing.
Ai doan blame yew NW. I blame it awn teh title ob the song.
I’ll bii hedding bak tew my ruum in teh NB nao. kthxbai
Has yoo nawt heerd teh joak abowt teh lolefant wif teh Porsche?
I finkso teh wun awn teh rite is kyootur, butt BOFE of dem has teh purty hares.
[puts hat awn rightist Nelson brudder]
**luuks at NC wif a sturnniss**
U want a beetin?
Ai yam goin straight tew my ruum in teh NB, K?
[installs bronze plaque awn door, "NC iz in!"]
Donut foargit ur hat!
Buttbuttbutt…ai doan haz ponytayle.
Ai fear ai yam nawt as seggsee az
XXXSB.[pursez lips]
I finkso yoo tryin to put me in teh goggie haus.
Good. Ai need sum kompany.
*hangs necktie on da ouwtside doornob*
Maine coons!!!! My favourite!
The uzual suspekts.