
We jus helpin pwevent identy thef
Picture by: dunno source Caption by: splittycat via Our LOL Builder
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We jus helpin pwevent identy thef
Picture by: dunno source Caption by: splittycat via Our LOL Builder
skilz – wih has tehm
Congrats, Italiana!
ofangyu, annipuss! … tehre r lawts uv uss inna luvlollee brayd! ai hazza happee foar awl uv uss!
i hazza hongry. Let’s go to teh Ty boot eek cafe, and has some Thai fuds. My treat.
Eye’m ryt behynd yu, sweetpea! Izz luntschtym wair eyeamm (whut eyeyamm), adn Thai fud wyl hitz teh spawt!
*nomnomnomnom*
I just finished eetin teh Mexi-kin fuds.
Iz nap tiem nao?
I kin has dinnur time?
Dinnur time nao, I jest decided. Has a gud nite/evening/morning/lunsch whutebbur. Iz hedded home. Obai!
we’re in your documents, shredding the evidence
Enron kittehs?
anoobodee has teh scotchy taype? teh kitteh got my receipt for teh inter-tubes!
Wit dat destrukshun yoo mite need teh ducky tape…..
is dete a kittey-tape?
mebbe sumpfin shred-proof?
hows about just teh scotch?
Hay! Didn’t yoo hab enuf to drink last nite? Hmmm?
nope! goin owt agin tonite! STN
Yoo had a sochul sekyurity nomnomnomber, but we eeted it!
Oh that where it went! Darn… And Iz been kweshuning mah sanity…
It wuz taystee and nutrishus!
Teh unantiss…unticapit…nawt yet thot awf uses awf teh soshul sekyurity nomburr -we showz u them!
*shayks in terror frum teh mere thot awf going to teh ‘mploymint awfice to git gnu nomnomnomnburr*
Byuurocracy, we has it. TTI has teh monarchy, VLC has teh democracy, we has teh byuurocracy…
Ai rekkun TTI haz awl 3!
Iz shur abowt teh nawtsekkund and sekkund. Butt Iz awlmost shur we has moar awf teh fird than awlmost NEwun…
Ifinkso we kin awl has byuurocracy. Whether we wuntz it or nawt.
Soshul sekyurity nombers – itz whutz for deener.
Owrz gets wuss bai teh dai! Dey wantid 2 maek ebbriwun hoo haz enni contakt wiv chillun (uvver dan blud relatibs) unnergo perlees chekks – eben stopt 2 wimmin hoo shaerd a jawb shaerin chyld caer.
gremlin is prolly rite. We awl has it…
I tried to git marrifyed while nawt akshoolee living wif mah hubbycat. Marrifying: Nawt big prollum. Butt afturr that… Oh my… “I can has rite tax class pwease? And gnu ID card?” Nawt so eezy… Him living there and me living here totulee oburstrains teh oothorities! We akshoolee redded teh laws to tell them peeple whut b rite, otterwise we still b running frum here to there, Ifinkso!
Nao mah kolleeg wus gitting marrifyed to woman frum ‘nudder country. ouchies…
Burro-crazee? Yup. We gots lawtsa tohse.
O yesh, o yesh, in fronschland we can haz teh crazee burro-crazee x elebenty
Tu littol stoarees foar yu, frum heer in VLC:
1. Sum yeers agon, ai had sent mai passpoart inn foar rignual. Wyul ai wuz waeting foar it, mai purs, wif awl mai ID, wuz stoald frum mai awfiss. Teh passpoart den aryvd at teh poast awfiss, bai teh Rejisturd Mael (gotta bee synd foar). Wen ai went tu pikking it up, dey sed ‘sho us ur ID, sew wii noes yu ar hu yu sed yu ar’. Ai splaynd abowt teh purs theft, an dat teh ownlee ID ai had wuz der in teh onbeloep dey had in der hands. ‘Gimme taht onbeloep, den ai kin sho yu mai ID’ ai sed. ‘Noes’ dey sed. ‘yu sho us ur ID, an DEN wii gibs yu teh onbeloep’. Ai splaynd AGIN abowt teh purs theft, an sed ‘OK, den YU oapin teh onbeloep, an den yu’ll cee dat’s mai ID’. ‘Wii cant du dat,’ dey sed. ‘Is nawt adrest tu us. Wud bees ileegul tu du dat. Ownlee naem awn onbeloep can oapin it’ dey sed. ‘Yu gots sum ID?’ dey akst. [Pls tu repeeting entyur ceekwens abowt ellebentee tiems, kthx, trine nawt tu beetnig hed (urs oar ders) awn cowntur] Ebenchulee, nuvver poastul wurkur caem obur an sed ‘Ai nawt noes hur purrsnlee, jus seh’s in heer free tiems a week wif teh bizniss maels foar abowt free yeers nao, an wii awlwaes sez ohai. Ai wil taeks teh risponsibuls foar gibbing hur teh onbeloep’. Wot a wunnerful wummin. Ai stil nawt noes hur naem, but seh saevd teh hole Poast Awfiss frum beeing bload up bai mii. Ai hoep dey preesheeates dat.
U showd wai moar payshunts an restraynt den ai fink ai wud haz bean able tew! Fank gudness few teh wummin whoo wuz willin tew uze sum kommon cents!
awn anuvver note…haow iz lil Brynna’s recobbery goin? Pleez tew gib hurr a lil *shmoo* frum meh?
Brynna sez fankees foar asking, an foar teh *shmoo*, tu. Seh’s duing grate, nawt eben teh taineeist sine ob ennee infekshuns oar uvver trubbils. Seh’s bak tu cuddloling wif Panda, hu bees hur Wun Troo Luv, an he seams tu hab foargibben hur teh ‘indiskreshun’ wif Bob. Seh’s prittee hostiel wif Bob, cos he wants tu chaysing an byting hur (hoepflee, dis wil stawp aftur his tutoring awn teh 29f, pls CC). An seh’s agresiv tu 17-yr-owld Delia, prollee stil finking seh needs tu protekting reesorsis an territree foar tu raysing kittins, an ai hoeps DAT stawps suun cos Delia Teh Grand Dame duz NAWT need stressis liek dat at hur aej.
Ai jus lukkd tu ceeing ware ebreewun is. Brynna an Panda are tugevvur awn tawp ob teh libbingruum radeeaytur, wif Percy trine tu stair dem awf cos dats wun ob hims faebrit spawts; Delia is up awn teh bak pilloes ob teh windoe seet heer in teh studee-cum-dyningruum, an Bob bees asleepees at teh tuvver end, but awn teh seet cushins. Dey awl luks sew coazee an peesful. *sighs wif a contentid*
lol, dat laydee kept you from going postlol.
Dis mae poast twies, furst wun gottid moduraetid intu oablivein.
2. Ai needs tu get gnu Helf Card, wut nao bees a foto ID. Tu getting it, yu needs tu sho sum uvver foto ID, liek teh passpoart. Ai nawt left teh contree sins 1992, an ai cant fynd mai passpoart, wich wud need tu bee rinude ennywae, cos expyrd in abowt ‘97, an expyrd ID cant bee yoosd. Sew ai lukkd up teh distrukshuns foar ‘Obtayning Foto ID Wen Yu Nawt Has Had Ennee Foto ID Bifoar’. An it sez, aftur ai gets staetmints frum sertin risponsibul peepuls saeing dat, as far as dey noes, ai am hu ai sez ai am, an wyul dis iznt wut dey’d cawl a gud foto, it luks jus liek mii, wel den ai’m spoast tu taeking doas staetmints …
[waet foar it] …
and sum foto ID!!!!!
wut ai doant hav, tu der awfiss foar teh aplicayshuns.
An den dey wunndurs wai peepuls want tu blowing up der bildings.
In TTI, iffn u haz no passport an noe dribin lisens, u doan’t eggzist!
Ai duzn’t hab eever an it’s berry hard 2 do lossa fings – liek wen Ai needid 2 rite to mai mumcat’s bank (her wuz rejisterd blind) Ai had 2 sho dem a gas bill, mai penshun entitulmint papur, mai bus pass an a bank staytmint frum mai bank – an I wuzn’t tryin 2 get hur munnee oar ennifing!
Fink it’s shreddid enuff
Big bruvver awf BC is wotching u!
Iz dey preventin idenity thef or comitin it….. Basement Kitteh is involvd aftur awl…..
basemant cat ALWAYS has da paws in it sumwarez…
preesishely mwahahaha
I wouddnt trust teh satisfied looks on there faces…
mebbeh BC izz traneifyeng a noo undurtehkuvvur reekroot??
mebbeh he is colektin noo minyons…..
He kollekted my kitteh long ago…
**Red comez in, dansin**
Best. wevverz. EVAR!
Woo-hoo!
**dans dans dans**
stop da gloatin. It makes yer butt(!) look big. Hmmmf.
ai has da MushAgan crankies…
da sun waz oot for 10 minutes, and now iz forevva losted agin. phhbt
melia, awl yu hazta doo izztu poosh teh Ai Knead Sunneeshyn butun – wyl instun … ensten … ryt awae, kwikfasztadninnahurree sendify awl teh sunneebeemz yu wantz – teh butun wuz inn teh boks wif teh synshyn ai sended yu awn teh laszt lol.
ooof! sille me! ai finded it!! No moar crankies.
And yer butt(!) not big atoll RHSB! iz wuz jus my screwed vishun ub da werld cauzzed by de infinte cowld adn darnkess ub da MushAgin. Ai hab a sorree
Pshaw! Gud wevverz doant eggzist until summer. Iz too cold naow lol. Enjoiz teh gud wevvverz!!!
**stiks tong owt at Cheezfrenz**
Y’all iz jest jellus dat y’all nawt has teh 35 degreez an rane. :-p
Ai haz teh 30 degreez adn rane. Ai nawt haz a jellus.
Who needz shreddifyin masheen wen yoo has kittehs?
Ohai frum Doobai!
dis bii mai Lincoln!
Ohai from Colorado!!! That is cyoote! It maed me lol. Yoo haz a byootiful kitteh!
Wow! Congrats to yoo! Yor kitteh is verreh kyoot and um . . . has verreh kyoot . . . um . . . *blushes; is unkarakteristikally speechless, but nawt for lawng*
We has a saying rownd here. Hao kin yoo tell that God is a Penn State fan? Bekawz teh sky is blue and white! So . . .
Hao kin yoo tell if yor kitteh is a Penn State fan? Bekawz himz uh – shall we say prosthetic hayrblls – ar blue and white!
an hees wun hansum boikat!
Othx yu guiz! Okae….mai leppytawp battree iz fadun…
enjoi!
LOL!! Lincoln is a cutie pie!
Ohhh. Shiny! Him cood be da fanci danser wif dat kwipment….
yur rite!
Dat’s akshully a good idee. Wow.
yupz, himz kud bih Kittehdale’s dannsur, aifinkso
Ohai ebreewun!
Iz dubble kibble dai awn teh freekibble site, pleez tew goe and plai the trivia kwestions fer teh kittehs an teh goggies tew. U doan eben haz tew git teh kwestion rite, if u plai teh kwestion teh donayshun iz maid. Kaithxhelpfeedourfurryfrends!
Free Kibble
*Runs off wivakwikness*
Ai yushullee go butt todai ai furgotted
ofangyu foar teh remyndifyer – ai jsut wented tehre.
Wii wuz feline a liddle claw-strophobic Mom, wii cuddnt hep ourseffs!
Oh douh my comment is in moderation. And its a guud one too
wuzzit….nawty, shee axked hopefullee?
OT, adn pls xqs if sumwun has already menshund tish, but did nebuddy see teh demonscrashun in NY yesserdai 4 Conan Obrian? Their wuz a bnch of peeps warin tshirts wif pixrs of conehead wif brite red harez, adn wun had a pixr of HAppiCaT warin red harez. Ai screamded!
Awsum! Duz u bemembur ware u saw teh pic? Ahd luv tew see taht! Er wuz it awn teh tv?
wahw! dose aur reelee halpful kittehz! <3
i tink thems is original watergate plumbers – shreding de docs.
I is not a krook.
of course you aer not a crook, adorable smudgie. you aer a journlolist exposé ying teh foiblols o teh humanz. oh wait. you were quoting Checker{s human. nebbermidn.
yesh, u was a cruk, but it wuz long tyme ago, and besydes, da wencsh iz dedd–
Shaekspeer AND Inspektur Moars ref, FTW!!!
Ohai, all you wunnerful Cheezpeeps! CK here again. This time, I thought I’d help this LOL out with a little shred music. Here’s Metallica, with “Seek And Destroy”.
ohai–ai iz toadally shredded now—Got enny moor nip, man? or summ cookies?
2 feenkz dat Kittehz
canz reezistz Shreddiddz Pay~purr
amz Reedawnkyooluss!
Shreddidz Pay~purr amz
eeben bettah dan CatzNip
2 playfullz Kittehz!!
Shreddiddz Pay~purr maykz
wundurrfull hissee sowndz wen
pownssd awn oarz attakktdz!!!
Bunneh Kikkz amz t3h
bessestz 4 Shreddiddz Pay~purr!
Maykz itz floatz inz ayr!!
Jack.
Thotful kittehz iz thotful!
I wonder what would
happen if we combined nip
with shredded paper?
hrmph. i thought I posted this ohaiku as reply to Jack Deth. hrumph.
I’ve actually heard of shredded docs being used as kitty litter… but seriously, though, would you really want Basement Cat in charge of your personal info?
wot a clawful mess!
omg that is hilarious!!!!!!