After waiting for 45 minutes, Roger was starting to fear that his blind date had seen him from the woods and left.
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After waiting for 45 minutes, Roger was starting to fear
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Berry wyze uv her!
Wye? Whutz rong wiff Rogur? (iffn ur anubber bare, dat iz)
Ai’m nawt a bare, soe Ai doan’t noe!
Ai haz seen much harrier dates, and him has lublii tablol mannurs.
(Until him gets hungrii.)
Izzit mai breff?
Him say: “Shurr ams lowzee survis in dis playce!! Waytur!!!”
Its wot baers DUZ in teh wuds taht put her off!
Whut? Wear red suspenders?
Teh U.S. kine, not teh TTI kine, of coarse.
Sillee, barez doan’t ware pants, so dey doan’t nead suspendurz!
Why u think it’s so off-putting?
“Bares fat, bares thin; all go ’round in bare skin.
And Roger’s gawt uh liddlol bear behind frum hiz nawt sekkund marrij.
Frum hur whakkin at him? Ohh – a littlol bare cub!
dey haz bares in TTI? hmmmph! I dinno no dat! Is dat wayer de gets dem ufny hats? No wuuner da bares haz da crankiniss
No…a funny hat.
But ai duzznt fit intu dem leetlol porta-potteez!
ht tp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXp_sd5lS44
she wuz mean as a bear!
I wood go in da other direxion!
Sheez hedjing hur bets.
*Leaves, having som douwts*
Mebbe sheez branching owt tu noo horizuns.
butt butt hims iz pineing fur hur.
his hoaps foar winning hur palm has turnd tu ash.
Poor Roger. No honey for him.
No shugar, eever.
We nao presents yu wif tihs eerwurm…
♫♪Shugar, aw, hunny hunny,
Yu iz mai candee grrrrl,
An yu gots me wanting yu
Hunny, aw shugar shugar… ♫♪
*runs fur teh woods wifakwikness*
[dumps a malted frum Pop Tate's Chocklit Shoppe awn PK's hed]
*luks uhrownd 4 Veronica*
Wun gud eerwurm deserves anudder
Adn anuvver…
.
♪♪ We sure like girls,
All kind of girls.
From Annie to Veronica!
We like ‘em small or fat or tall♪♪
I wanna play my harmonica!
[curses AAHZ]
[shakes fist at teh necromancer]
Ai shuld gno beddur dan tew go up aginst teh wizard
[wanders awf tew stick hot pokers in eerz]
POKER?!?
*shuffleshuffleshuffle*
*cut*
*antes up*
‘Tay, naow — hooz in?
I’m in!
Um… du yu haz enny… sebens?
Noap! Goe fish …
.
HAY!!
Otay! *gets fishing rod* *goes tu bait shop*
HUH? Wut awr wii playin’? WUT? Speak up wuld yew. EH? No, I don’t gno hao to revive hard mud. Wut a silly kweschun.
an heer iz anuthur:
Noh shugar toonite en mai koffee
Noh shugar toonite in mai tii
Noh shugar tu stand beesyde mi
Noh shugar tu run wif mi
Da do da da…
Oooh — adn derez ebben Sabrina teh teeny-ayj which!!
…and after awl teh trubble hii wen tew combing hiz hair.
mebbe hims has hives?
Gud fing hii cawt uh liddlol buzz before koming owt.
Udderwise hii mite bee bummed.
Eben tho he keppd droning on abowt nuffin innerestin.
Except dat wun story abowt teh tiem hii took uh wrong turn
adn ended up at teh nudist colony
Liez – awl liez – adn ahm nawt pollen foar it!
Beeleeb it oar nawt, dats up tew yew, butt(!) at least it wuz swarm dat day for awl doez nekkid apiarst wif teh bear behinds.
Kareful nawt tu get teh sting ob sunburn awn ur neck-deyr.
neck-deyr! @@@@@
Doan wurree bowt himz — he hasta goe bak hoam 2 himz queen
[narrows eyes at aahz]
Eggzactly wut awr yew trying tew imply?
heshe lets mii stay owt adn play in teh sun az mush az ai want.Izza berry hansum bear!
teh survice at dis resturant iz terriblol!
I’m sorry, sir. This is not my forest.
whu’s forrust iz et?? ware’s mai waitur??
Prawbuhblee sumwear makeeng yew wait…er…wait! wut?
oar eeting yur oirjinul waitur…
“Hey, there’s soup awn dis waiter’s thumb” *slurp* *nom*
“Oh, deres a waitur’s thumb in mai soup.” *slurp slurp*
Kwiet! Nao ebrywun is gonna want wun!
“Waytur! Wattz dis thumm dewin n mai soop?”
“Hitchin 4 uh ryd, I finksew.”
*sigh* Jes az well. Roger culdn’t bear anudder face tew face rejekshun.
O, hay, NC66! Guess whut? SMOM has translatified our Redneck Scientist list into Ingerlish and postified it on her FB page! They like it! They rly rly like it!
Oh dats wunnerful. Yew gawt linkee purrhaps?
Is u on teh book of teh faces?
Oops
No, iz uhginst my relijun oar sumfing liek dat.
Ai gawts tew hab FB account tew see it?
Yeah, u needs a FB account for that. But I can copyandpaste it. U can e-mail me at teh lolcatburglar at teh gmails and I will send it to u.
Ai fot yew had my emeow addy. BRB.
I might have swallowed it on accident when I thought I was cornered by teh enmeny agents. It turned out to just be my phlonquais in his new beret and sunglasses. Whoops.
Yew have an emeow.
So does u.
Ahhhh…gud tiemz…*sigh*
*watches teh emeow bownse back an forf lyk in a tennis gaym*
P-K, halp me convincify na66 to join teh book of faces! I telled him it was a party every day and a rocknroll all nite. Rite? RITE?
Absololootlee! Teh funs nebber stops!!! *nodnodnod wifavigrus*
Come, join us, donut be afraid….
Ai hazza apreehen…apryhin…misgiving abowt publicity.
Mehbee ai will gib Shirley an account.
Gnu priva-sea settings opshuns be preddy gud… can set it so no wun can finding yu, lyk pleh ex’s oar relatibs yu wud ravver furget oar ennyfing lyk that.
Can finding me if yu clikking mai blooniss… cannawt find me bai serch in teh bukk uv faises, coz uv mai priva-sea settings.
Ew. Hayrball.
dat list wuz wun ob de FUNNIESTESTEST fings ai hab eber seen, wif cc as mai witless.
Roger’s picture waz taken 10 years an 45#’s ago.
eh-harmonee gotz dis wun rong…
Ohai, all you awesome Cheezpeeps! CK here again with another “Blast From The Past”. This time, I decided to do some harder stuff from the 80′s. Here’s Blue Oyster Cult with “Burnin’ For You”.
Wut tihs haz to do wiv lol or cheezeland?
Rogurz burning fur lubs, mebbe? (ai kno, izza strech)
iz enturtaynmint.
OH HAI. Goldylocks could nawt come. Wuz stuck in traffiks and is sleepin over wif sum friends.
And, she hassta weerk late all next week.
And she is washing hur hares.
And after dat, she hasza paper due.
Doan furget teh pololishing ob teh finnernayls! Dat tayks owerz!
*closes account*
*changes e-mayo dress*
*flushes sell fone*
Ha! The joke awn yew GL. Ai bugged yor pourij. Yer nawt dealing wif yor runaduhmill stalker here. Ai iz profesh…purrfish…eggspert.
*signs restrayning order*
[turns ober restrayning order adn writes elebenty wurd rambling lub letter]
[slips luv letter intew baskit of goodies]
Oh wait! Rong fairy tale.
*shrugs* Wutever! Ai liek red heds tew.
*packs up belongings*
*goes to live at grammovers howse*
[vizits ebil step mudders howse adb cries eyes owt]
Ai jes can’t live wifowt hurr.
Ai miss teh way shii yoosed tew shake her tuffet.
[worms lokayshun ob granmudders howse owtta ESM]
♪ Over teh ribber adn threw duh woodz… ♪
O mai, NC66 — U luk teh nys n teh red hud 4 rydin…
.
.
“He’s got a cute face, too! See?”
tanx Aahz… taht iz my allatym fav o rite WB cartoon, TA HAVE!!!
Yew awr lucky krelm. Ai can nawt hab uh allatym faborite.
Ai luvs them awl. Dis wun iz in my tawp elebenty, tho.
But her hares iz jumping owt ov teh tubs adn hopping aways, so iz taking long tiems.
Sadd tu bii ehloyn
Wandahrun teh whirrld wondrun
Weer iz won fur mii?
Mai dayt sed “Ahm deyr”
But ai can fynd hur no-wayr
Mai hart is awn fyer
Luvly wurds sed wel !! Thx boaf ob yew !!
brilliant…har har D har.
Regardless of whether Roger brawt teh pikinik baskit oar nawt, Ranger Smith wuz having sekkund thots about cheating awn Yogi N-E-way.
Oh Hai!! I iz bak frum deh whirrld wifowt innertuubz.
*wunderz if aneewun notissed I wuz gone.*
Yay! Welkums bakk!
*dans-dans-tehcweenisbakk-dans-dans*
Thankeez….. It b such a skeery plais wifowt deh innnerwebz…. u haz tu talking tu peepz fais tu fais!!!
ack! is iz 2 2 stronj. Dey has FAISES??
Oh gnoez! Yew had tew bear teh full frontals? In personage?
Oh teh Huge Manatee
It were beary fritening!
I bets it were unbearabull!
Ohai, cween! I misted U! It wuz teh grizzly wiffowt U…
U nawt has telofonez neithur?
Well, yesh, wii duz haz deh sellofonez.
But I missinged awl deh Cheezpeepz!
Teh horrors! Oh, yur majesteee, hao eber did yu survive such depri… dep… living wifowt???
Uv corse we notissed! It waz lyk a whirrld wifowt sun, a partee wifowt musik, a meel wif no flavur!!!
Welcome back, mai cween!!!
Kwik, summon teh royal fanfarerererers wif teh horns fur tu blow teh fanfair!!! Get owt teh red carpet!!!
{{{{{{{PK}}}}}}}}
AWL RYZ 4 HERZ MAJISTEE TEH CWEEN
yuppers–it wuz difrent, seh unnerstayted….
Do bears sit in the woods?
noh, tehy sits at piknik tayblols.
Roger, you’re fine and IT’S FINE – she’s held up in traffic and as you don’t have a pocket for a cell phone – - – - Oh, noes!!!
Who’s Weaving the Bear Loom now?
This is me at every date in my life. Hahah. Poor bear.
thats hillarious
so my 7 year old said he was sitting there like a “gentlebear”