Srsly, when do you think i’ll ever get close nuff to water to need this?
iz awlwayz important 2 haz ur floatiez on.
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oh kitteh, some questions you just shouldn’t ask…..
Congrats, SHD!
*bows*
That cat has a life preserver on! We should all be so lucky so witness such an event in real life. Maybe they are on a ship at sea and it could drown but who knows. It seems fashionable and probably all cats should consider this outfit even when water is not a threat -.-
When cats are around with new clothes to wear we should ostensibly be fearful but truthfully no threat exists for cats are small and don’t wear clothes. Though they are waiting around for you to die so they can eat you as long as you live you are safe.
O hai, SHD! Iz only a littol late, *Butt(!) what wuld yu lyke tu drinkee fur yor nawt-sekond? Chawklit martoonie? Hawt cuppa kawfee/tee? Beer? Herez a trolly wif awl dose an more! Nuff for eberyones! Also, da homade jelelly-filleded dounuts, pecan sticky rolls bluedaberry pancakes wif hawt REAL maple surps! Congradumaloltions, SHD!
Harooo SHD!!!!!
Congaratz tu yew!
Aye iz hiding frum werk tudai (dey’ll neber luk fur mii hear), adn iz sew delited tu bee seeing yew!!! Adn Nawt-Sekkinf at that!
Ooh Smammie! Is good to see yu!
{{{schmoo!!!!}}} Iz gud tu bii seeing ebbrywun, iz a beri tru fing.
Hoppi Nu Yere tu wun adn awl, sez Aye. Iz gotch fingiez crost dat dis wun will bii beddarur den lass wun (hart tu bii wurst…)
O hai, Smammie! It has been too many whiles. How u is? Does u know what is teh Swedish word for “firemans”?
brandman
oooh ohh, Aye seas iz tu laet tu warn yew nawt tu go a googling dat…
shmammieZ!!!!! good to see da lil possom.
ohai, smammie! aidunawtfinkso wih haz meeted yetz … *extendses flooffee paw uv frennshyp tu smammie*
from personal experience: when handed an uncomfortable piece of safety equipment, the type for a messy, difficult, and possibly dangerous job, it’s usually time to sweat.
wud raddur wrassle aggalatorz den deel wiffa sweaty cat, thankumz juss teh saem….
“yur teh awnlee won hu ken du dis”
(weer tu chickun)
Iffn Kitteh haz ennifing 2 do wiv it – nebber.
pointy ends can get around, yu kno
Srsly, iz dis uh Mae West yoo put awn mii oar awr yew just happy tew hab yor shins shredded?
snikur, snikur… snarf.
gud wun!
yu, awn teh udda han…
Its a KITLER
*looks at picture*
*goes off in search of a Swede to hug*
*gets idea*
*goes to look up teh Swedish word for “firemans”*
*googles “swedish fireman”*
*has a shocked at one of teh results*
*well, not a shocked eggsackly but cannot click link from current location*
*jots down URL*
derez komputaz een teh nawty barn…
I have sayed it before and I will say it another time: This site is teh edumacational in ways I never dreamed of. *nods*
*heads to teh NB to, um, check e-mail. Yep. That’s teh tikket.*
adn dere Aye wuz, lukkin atz teh piktur, adn wunnerin why ennywun wud wanna hug a rutabaga… wunce agin, Aye haz miscornstrewd teh sitchewation….
Aye wz prolly beddar orf…..
The reasons, let me list them for u:
A rutabaga is much moar cuddlier than a turnip.
Boring to hug most other vegetables.
Can’t kiss them; that would be wrong.
Dating serviss keeps sending them to u, so u might as well enjoy them.
E…
Eggplants are “shrinkin violets”
Fennel wilts unner heavy hugginz
Great to carve iffin yu doan haz a punkin
H…..
Eggplantz ar jus playn fuglee
Fat rutabagaz nede lub, tu
Gud fur yu, veggeez iz!
Hapi, eet maykz dem!
I…
Ironically, rutabagas donot like shaking hands wif u.
Jerry Springer reunited u wif teh rutabaga on live tV.
Kale is not emotionally responsive enuff for u.
L…
Lettus iz tu frajyle
Mummy awlwayz sed rutabagas amz gud fur yu
Nomming yur rutabaga frend wud bii rong
Onyums will oanly bring yew teers
P…
Parsnips is just not that into u.
Quality time wif ur veggies is teh impoartant.
Rutabagas are vry touchy-feely.
S…
Potaytoes be furm
(Quite teh flexuble vegitamibul)
Raddushes 2 teeny
Souckotash too diffykult to spell
T…
Tomatoes has a fear of commitment
Unfruitful to woo a vegetable
Vinaigrette dressing is spread moar evenly if u use ur arms.
W…
Wutabagas onlee git hugz frum Elmer Fudd
Xposhure tew haggis makes a swede shiver
Yellow turnips need lub too
Zukuninniiz fits ob gelusea awr teh phunny
Wye wud yu nawt?
Xtra ruffaj
YNR!!!
Zaniest ting yule du tudae!
*sees teh wurd vinaigrette; faints*
Unfaints to esplain back storeh: I was a finaliszt in our state spellink contest when I wuz in 6th grade. That wuz teh wurd that took me down. Funny, but I culd hav bet I’d NEVER meet that wurd on this site. Especially spelld korrekly (and I shuld gno).
*refaints*
O noes!!1! Gremlin is down!
*splashes cruet of vinaig— um, chonky bloo cheez in gremlin’s face*
*fans her wif a lettuce leaf*
*nervously hugs a rutabaga*
*noms teh dressing and teh lettuce leaf* Hey, did that rutabaga give consent to being fondled in that manner? Hmm???
icicles hanging off veggies left in garden
jicama does not look huggable
kale too floppy
lettuce too limp
m…
Jinx! Buy me a Kale Kola!
On second thought, don’t.
You be good or I’ll send you a Swedish Fireman, as seen on Amaxon.com!
I reeded that rong… I thought u were going to send wun to LCB if she was good… not reelee that gud of an incentive – when u reed like ai did…
Mushrums kin gib yu a fungis,
No veggys ai kin fink ov start wif n
(an nao ai iz frayed ov google)
Oranges will sqwirt yu in teh eye,
Peas are tu hard tu catch,
Q
OH, LCB!!!! Nawt to be jottin down THAT site!!
*ponders if dere be ‘before an aftur pics*
LOL Nao can not git grin awf of faze!!!
Just so long as there is not any “during” pics.
Tru dat!!
Holy vroom vroom bacuum, batman!
Hee. One of my FB frenz posted that he was in teh dentist chair and hadda pee. No one was in teh room wif him because they was developing x-rays or something. Somebuddy replied that he should just use teh suction thingy from teh swirly sink.
My frenz gots weird frenz.
Ewwww! Ai haz tu go tu teh dennist neggst weekweekweek, nao ai iz gonna hab a braynewurm!
*hands ph teh brayne bleech*
**grabz brayne bleech, poors entyre boddlol in eer** Oopz, furgawt tu plug teh odder side. Nao jist luk at dis mess! **cleenz up bleech spill** Sawree bowt your navee bloo rug, dere. Butt the spot iz kinda shayped like a swedish fireman, yufinkso?
*looks at stain*
*consults “Hints from Heckoise”*
*buys up all teh speshul Chik-Fil-A sauce*
*applies to stain*
**wondurs if Heckoise rekkominds using sauce in teh swedish fireman, an if sew, hao LCB nose dis?**
Would u rather consult Marfa Stewart?
LCB! They’re hiring at Cheezburgerland! Go look at the “We’re hiring” link! Go now!
I goed! I looked!
Is teh temptifying, but I doesnot has teh tech skillz for some and would has to take a huge pay cut for some others. Plus I’ll bet they doesnot pay in shiny things.
Pay cut schmay cut! Yoo wud be teh famus! Even moar famuser tahn yoo bees naow! And tehy wud pay yoo in shiney niklols, dimes n quarters, ai bet.
Um, LCB, ai wud nawt think u wud be needin dis item…
Well, u knoes what a fillantrhopist I is. Mabye I will use it to halp peeps who is a little… short.
yu hadded a GUD eyedeer, soe ai …
*luks atz pikshoor*
*goze awf inz surch uv a YHL (Yung Hunkee Lyfegarrd) tu huggify*
*swuneses*
… adn if’n ai dew, YU wil nead stichus adn maiB a tranzfyoosamacayshun …
KITLER
Orinj floatuhblol confetti in 3…2…1
But Ai mite needz floaties….
Tuxii kitteh iz happy tew oblige wif lawts adn lawts ob liddlol itteh bitteh flottehz.
….ew….
Wut ai say?
Did ai alreddy brake my gnu deers revolushun
of nawt makin’ teh potty referensez sew mush?
Carp!
Dubblol Carp!
Ai wuz talkin bout da ‘YESH MOM I HAZ FLOATIES’ kitteh! Eeew!
*splash* Hey it works.!
ohai, 5eagles!
Oh hai Q. How have you beeen.?
“Member when goggie pushed u in de pool?”
Kitteh says ” oh rite, we useta haz a goggie…”
Flood plains kitteh is not amused
He looks just like my cat! O_o Exept for the black nose…
Ohai, Hamsi. Nice to meetcha. Yor kitteh is verreh nyce lukking if s/he looks lyke this!
I hopes yoo duz nawt dress yor kitteh in silleh owtfits tho . . . kittehs duz nawt lyke that.
Noooo, I wouldn´t dare! XD Don would kill me in my sleep. He is mafia, you know.
Though he doesn´t look as mean as this kitteh… *hehe* Teh good twin brother, eh?