You don’t understand. This
You don’t understand. This leash isn’t to protect me. It’s to protect YOU!
nd dont u dare tell me 2 mush.
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Then u take teh lead, kitteh.
rite behind LCB! conga-rats! gud wun!
O hai, tess. Lissen, I has to go, um… do something. Will u walk teh kitteh? Here is hims leash. kthxihopeuhashealthinsurances
well, OK… c’mon kitteh, let’s go for a waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Happy Cat is happy…. to sho yu teh terror ob teh Walk.
Iz HappiCatz ebil twinn
con cat you leash ‘ems. to siilibrate i sing fur you
♪pllllllleeeeeeeeeease re leash me… let me go♪
*unhooks leash from sweetpea’s collar*
*frolicks around da gwumpy kitteh in da pic*
i’m not touching you i’m not touching you
Uh-oh.
*gets out extry set of insurance forms, just to be sure*
*gets 20 gallum drum ob catnip oil adn hooks it to a supersoaker. No, make that a water canon*
*fires water canon at grumpy*
Hello, insurances company? O hai, this is LCB. How u is? Mm-hmm. Rly? No! U’r kidding! In a big silver bloon? Wow. Well, good luck on that. Anyhows, I is calling to put in a eggmergency requestification for elebenty reams of insurance forms. We need them, stat! Why? Because there is a grumpy kitteh on a leash here and he’s reeking of havoc, that’s why! Plz to send teh forms rite away? kthxohandextrypensilstoo
“reeking of havoc” FTW!!!!!1!
*heddesk + faysepaw*
ow, I klunked my paw btw mai hed and teh desk.
Does u has ur insurance forms filled out in fiveplicate?
Sassafrassniplicate, shurely. Didn’t you reed teh updayted guide?
I *rote* teh updated guide. I doesnot has a sassafrass key on my keybroad, so I changeded it. STNADCMS
owie, tessm. i sing s’mores fur you to halp?
♪ purrrrrrr i don’t lub dat goggie, noes!
hims fur is warm but nose is cold!
so re leash HIM and let me roam agaaaaaaaaaain
*clappity clappity*
ow, that hurtz mai paw.
beware o guard kitteh
Dis be teh kitteh that sold weppuns adn stuff on teh Pearls before Swine cartoonie?
i hazza stoopy? feed me some brwain food (shwimps) and hints re cartoonie? kthxwaitingwhifbaite’dbref
I dint see cartoonie, but can offur yu late ov scrimp scampi! extry garlic!
¡¡¡N0M!!
Ai haz a feerse
an ai’m nawt gonna get in yur wai. yu an yur feerse jus stai ovr der, an ai’ll stay ovr heer. nu-uh. no-wai. nawt gonna temp fate.
Ai temps fur Fate alla tyme!
Mah best hostile luk, let me show yoo it!
oooh, skaree!! is that u, or is that a t-r-o-l-l mask u iz warin?
*sneeks up awn tess wifastelfee*
*POWNSE*
{{{{{{{tess}}}}}}}
Ohai!!!! *purrRRRrrRRrrrRRRrrr*
*leeps five feet up in air*
Yikes!
oh it’s u {steph}! um, ai mented to do that!
purrpurrpurr snorgle
Twas a mask, I must admit!
*pulls hostile-lukking mask away to reveel beeg GRIN!*
Un-Happeh Cat.
Happeh Cat nawt sew happeh, akshooly
Ai iz menny wiles late fur dis lol — but ur comment iz purrzaktlee teh wun ai wud haz rited if ai had been heer earlier.
U iz teh smart, fikshunkitteh!
Happeekat needs happee refill!
Is dis da sayme kitteh from lastLOL? Jus in daylite?
If not, mabye they is teh related?
OOohh, can u imagine whut their fambly reunions must be like? *shudders in horror*
I thought de same thing!
Hims beautimus though!
awl teh grey kittehs are Maltese… so duz that make them “teezers”, like Siamese = meezers?
Duz u hab malteezers! Mai fabrit chokklit!
ohai anni! ai haz wun kitteh whut is awl grey so we calls her Maltese.
whut iz this chocklit u speek uv????
Sew Happeh is a Chartreux aifinkso
aifinkso “Maltese” refers to enny grey cat — then there are specific breeds like Chartreux that are grey, so they are alsew Malteese by default!
Aifinkso teh teknicul term fur gray cats iz “bloo”?
So a russhin blu is actualee frum Malta?
Hmm… maltese be a namerikanism, lukks lyk, ur short-haired gray/bloo kittehs. Inneresting… ai haz lernded a noo fing.
My soul kitteh lukked bery mutch lyke this wun. I though he musta been mostly Chartreux, ‘cauz hi purrsunality fit teh chartreux descripshun. Eben tho he was the lovingest cat evver, he lukked fierce in photos — he did NAWT like havving his photo taken.
Kinda like nawt taking photos ov Clark Kent so nobuddy figures out that he is Superman when teh glasses come awf….
Mabye he growed up in Soviet Russia? One of teh peeps I work wif was and even though he is always smiling and laffing, when u take his picshur he looks grim. He says it’s long habit from his yoot; I think if u smiled in a Soviet Russia picshur u got sended to Gilligan’s Gulag.
Sekret Agent Cat…they’s givven yu a number, and taking away your name.
But
I am nawt a nummer! I am a Free Cat!
*flicks Bic*
FREE CAT!
Mah father is nawt frum Soviet Russia, but he libs by teh saym rools of fotograffee. No smiolin in pikshors, on thret of deth! Is a generational thing, ifinkso . . .
Free cat wif purchase ov 50 pund bag of kibble!
Yay, ai haz a malteeza cat – ai awlwaiz fort he was a “gutta cat” (tronslashun from teh fronsch furr a cat ov no fixt breed)!
la nuit, tous les chats sont gris, non?
Oui, c’est cela!
I has a question. Here is my question:
Whut does u call a cat of no fixt breed if it has been fixt?
This concludes my question. I’ll hang up and listen to my answer online. kthxbai
Hmm this iz a gud kweschun, ai’m pleezed yu arxed it!
a mixiefixie?? Ai’m jsut sayen’ …
Neuti-tutti?
*heddesk*
Ai cawl a spayad a spayad
Lol anni!!!
Ai doan gno wut yew call it, butt(!) it wuz mad affur teh V.E.T. dun it tew it.
Iz a rownd crisp malted milk senter cubberd wiv milk chokklitt. Dey wuz markitid as “teh chokklitt wiv teh less fattenin senter”
ht tp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maltesers
Cloes up teh gap!
oooh! yes, we can haz teh Whoppers malted milk balls!
and it luuks like they can haz WHITE CHOCKLIT wuns too! OMCC!
.
ai go tell my Mia kitteh, “Nothing pleases like Maltesers!”
Wii can has malteezers in teh VLC tu, tehy am wundermus! Gots malty spongy melt-in-yer-mouf ball ob yumminess coated in choklit, ai’s drooling jus finking ob dems!
Oh Tess! Yoo no can has Maltesers in MSA? Go luk on Wikipedia! Dey bees bery addictib!
um, sounz like mebbe whut we calls, malted milk balls. they haz a crunchee, rite? ai lubs dem too!
Yup!
U can’t juss hab wun! U haz 2 eet teh hole pakkit.
oh, yesh yesh yesh! *crunch crunhc crunch*
taht is SOE troo – awl tihs tawk bowt teh maltymeowlk ballz, ai hadded tu goe upz tu teh stoar adn bie a bag uv tehm … adn ai hideded tehm in teh bawtum drowur uv mai deswkz soe noe wun ellz wud at mai off iss wud noe tehy wuzs tehr – butt (!!) if mai cheez peeps wants sum, yu can has.
Yu still got sum left??
Yupz! Jsut sneekify tu mai dessk – tehy’r inz teh boddum dror awn teh ryt syd – hepp yurselfz, butt (!!) noe letz teh peeplol inz mai off iss seez yu, oar tehr wil bih nun lefft kwikfastzadninnahurrie.
(Ai misst sumfing… MSA?)
Medium Sized America
I thot America was large sized?
Not compared to Very Large Canaydia!
Ifinkso teh Texans will argue that!
wut?
or deh eggstremely large Soviet Rushya
In Soviet Russha, EVERYTHING is bigger!!
Are thinking wut I’m thinking, two_kittehs?
Get Baryshikov some tighter tights?
Reminds me ov a photo ov Nureyev still floating around teh web that proovifies teh point.
Nureyev could float???
could float my boat, oh yes yes yes!
Canaydia so big it scary….*whimpers*
it make me feel small,but if in canaydia, step on it! hahaha!! *evil laugh* *cough* need…air…
this kitteh iz be lookin like my danielle katz.
Ifn youz donut remove leesh soon
Yer sofaz an rugz I iz gonna roon
Baffore youz lets sumfin liek dis startz
Best to member my poyntee partz.
*schnikkk* (dats teh soun of pointee parts unsheething)
Yays, Cory-Bear all dun tutoring sir jury! Awl gud!! Can coming hoam at 11am cheezthyme (dat be in less tehn 5 owrs… onlee 17,100 sekkunds tu go, gibbertayk).
Me, oberpurrtektives?? Missing mai lil bear? Uv corse nawt.
Iz liek wen ur hoomin kidlet starts skool!
Did u tell him that after hims surgery he can has all teh ice cream in teh whirled he can eat?
Dat’s fur tonsilz owt nawt fur tootorin!
OIC. Can I has Cory’s ice cream, then?
Him can has awl teh gushifuds him wants, coz him cud nawt eet last nite.
In lil bits, coz nawt want him sick, tho.
*ponders eye screem fur tutoring* Ai cud finding him an eye spak…
Noes, dat be a butt spak.
just make sure is nawt butt spackle.
(ai donut know whut that is, butt (!) it donut sound gud.)
Him kin sit on a bag uv frozen peez (mebbe a flannik uv dem??) – dey beez gud eye-spaks.
*bites tung hard on bad pun bowt frozin peez tu sit awn an trais tu lukk lyk she wud nevver fink sucha fing*
*snaps photo of p-k’s contorted face*
Oooh! This one will go on the blooper reel!
Aifinkso kittehs awlways lurves teh eye screem, speshuly banilla.
Hay, I never did get a answer: I can or I can ain’t has Cory’s ice creem?
*gibs dish ov Blue Bell eis creme to lcb; gibs anuvver wun to Cory*
Hay! Cory got more than I did. That’s no fair!
you can haz Cory’s leftobers, ifn yu wants
*wonders if lcb notissed Cory sat in his insted ov eeting it.*
did yoo mean Bloo Bell, or Bloo B-
*is yanked off to teh NB by teh sensor*
hmm, well, sins Cory bakk frum tutoring, Blue Bell is teh moar fitting…
Bloo Bunny, iz whut u was gonna say, rite?
*runs bak in wif hook still round hur wayst*
um, yesh! that’s it!!
those sensors was a little pre mature!
Mebbe dis mirror boy Tacyppah?
ʇɐɔ ʎddɐɥ
@@@@@!
Whut u think this is, Mirrorcat Manor?
ohai LCB how U iz?
O hai. I is teh ok, thx. Well, tomorrow I is havening some surgeries to halp show some abbynormal cells I has that they is teh not welcome, kthxgetouttaherescram. But apart from that, all is teh fine and also dandy.
How u is?
gud luk with the sirjuries, and keep us posted k?
I is the fine, but has a serious case RL wif too mush to does an too liddle tyme.
I will post after I get home. That should be teh interesting.
They is using teh lasers on me! PEW! PEW! PEW!
Juest keep teh fyremens handy to put out enny fires…and a dish of ise creams, too.
Plz to take this wif u!
*gives LCB extra shiney sooperpower laser in hancer*
BIG Kitteh reminds me of Blackie from Chi’s Sweet Home.
Ohai, Cygnia. I duz nawt think I has met yoo befoar. *extends frenlee floofy orinj paw*
I did nawt noes of teh anime series Chi’s Sweet Home befoar, abowt a kitteh. I googloled it and fown sum episodes on YooToob. Interesting, YooLurnSumthingNooEveryDayKThx!
Yay! *shakes paw happily*
Chi iz indeed one of teh kyootest kittehs I haz evr seen in cartoons.
I still need to see teh noo show Chi’s New Address.
Wher yoo B frum, Cygnia? Teh Chi kitteh luks a bit lyke mah gray tabby kitteh with whyt bib and paws . . . Of korse I think I may be biased but it duz look lyke a kyoot kitteh!
Teh wunderble place dey call “Cleveland”. (Teh one in Ohio).
I haz a grey tabby too! She iz currently trying to NOM my leg fer pettins.
ifz shih finkz ai’m gunna wawk onna leesh lyk sum stoopid goggie, shiz gawt anuzzer fink kommin. adn wyl shiz finkin, shih beddur fink befoar shih putz awn hirz shooz …
ai has a kitteh tat lurves to go out onna leash..she sits bai do dor adn luks up at da leash and meoows adn den luks at us adn meoowrs more..want out..
Somehow I find myself feeling very sympathetic toward El Gato Mas Grande, here.
One El Gato Mas Grande with extry spresso, coming up!
Luk owt, that luks awfully HAWT!!!!
Oh, ur rite.
*sets down cuppa El Gato Mas Grande with extry spresso*
*attaches leash to cuppa El Gato Mas Grande with extry spresso*
*leads cuppa El Gato Mas Grande with extry spresso to Theo*
Mmm. Ooh, can I get a shot of Bailey’s too?
tuff cat is tuff
Happeh Cat has a Grumpeh
And neggst, he’ll hav a Sleepy . . .
… tu sae nuffink uv a Doapee …
and a Sneezy, and a Dopey….
I think this cat is misunderstood. It’s not angry. No one is holding that leash. This powerful feline is levitating the leash with utmost mental focus – not intimidating, but impressive.
emailstudy.wordpress.com
heh, peeke’d at yr link; yr emails is teh funny.
Dis cat: one tough-luking kusstumr!!1 Bet he all man: hrbllz and all. He lukz it.
“None of you seem to understand. I’m not locked in here with you. You’re locked in here with me.”
Watchmen! Great quote.
Also, this is one of the best LOLs I’ve seen in a long time.
Rorschach kitteh?
Innah few bloodeh moments, you’ll wish dhat I had chains on insteed of jush dis pyunee leeesh…
tuff, yet fair
thats my bro