but MOMMEH!!!

but MOMMEH!!! ebereebodee els iz goin!!1!
Picture by: dunno source. Caption by: Ingrid via Our LOL Builder
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but MOMMEH!!! ebereebodee els iz goin!!1!
Picture by: dunno source. Caption by: Ingrid via Our LOL Builder
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
I wanna go!
Conga Rats Shoelaces on teh Not Sekind!
Fankies! I preeshiate it!
I bets you wanna go RITE NAO……rite?
Rite…..dis….minnit, akshulleh!
Chop chop chop!
The Conga rats emerge to do a quick & livelee 2-step to Dance of the Hours (Fantasia)
duz enneewun els think tihs kitteh wants tew go tew zoo wif Harree, Dudlee, Unkle Vernun an Ant Petoonya?
jus somfin abowt brikk wall an teh gray car..
Mebbeh the mummy kitteh really is prof. Mcgonnagawl?!?
ooooo, gud wun, nenne! It cud be her, an that cud be Drayko in teh bakkgrownd!
I wants to jump from bridge, too!
If dem wuz awl going fur tutoring, Wuud U still wantz tu go?
eeerrrrrr….
Wut iz dey tootering?? I mite bee intressted in tooterin …
Asplodin fings
Butterer makin
Cyooky cukee eetin
Divin inna da eye screem tub
E…
Ebberytihng to do wib fuds
Fud – weer to fynd eet
Goggies – haow to teasify
Huuuula lessins
I…
Engrish,
Fronch,
Germon,
Haikoos
Italyun
Jax
K. . .
Kickboxing
Lifting waites
Mathemitatics
N…
Needelwerks an embroydree
Owl stretching
Playin bridj
Qoits
Reedin fastlike
S…
Sleeping ….. Wut?? I wantz tu b on deh Limpic Sleeping Teem!
Tango
U….
Umbrella maeking
Violinz
Waltzing
X…
Xzaminin da cheezburgerz I luvs dat
Yearnig how ta hunt da cheezburgers
Zzzzzzzzzzzzz Oops! Aye falls asleep
xylafone making
yellow jellow, making also
zebra calling
TADA
Yer grownded.
I don’t efen kno wat I did…
or diddint do…
or what letter the teecher gave me to give to you and I was askared so I shredded it, burned the shreds and fed teh ashed to teh goggie.
I mean, huh?
Watebber you did maked da goggie sick. Now go fink about it in da corner.
Butt(!) There’s a Starbucks on the corner!
There’s a Starbucks on evree korner!
Gud; bring me a cinnamon latte!
Here is your quad grande ina venti cup half-caf 2 percent 190 degree with whip and sprinkles sugar free cinnamon dolce latte.
enjoy!
Did you fergit da punkin wippie creem?
Ai can haz teh pawt uf arbuklol kawfee, hawt, blak adn strong enuf tu flote teh horsie shu wif teh horsie still innit?
ai pwomiss ai won bee layte!
What if I kleen my room Reeli guud?
And wahk teh goggie?
Adn mow teh grass?
And…
Apply da paynt
Bathe the stinky gogggie
Cleens dah toylit
….
Dust teh bunnehs?
Eerwurms, give tew eberywun?
Floof teh swoonin pillows?
G…
go tu piano lessinz wifowt kumplayning
Halp du deh dishez
Inbestigate deh monster unner deh bed
J…
oooo piano lessons wifouwt kumplayning- relebent to my interests.
akshully, IRL, kids kinda like cominig to da cwazy lady (moi) for lessons; they just donut like teh practicing
oh, Public Serbice A Nouns Mint:
any cheezpeeps can taek da peano lessons from me adn pay in shwimps! wheeeeee
u kan du teh yu-key-lay-lee lessins, too?
I haz prawns, and kac get teh scallops if necessaree…
‘kay, itz a deal: you teach me yukeylaylee, and i eat teh prawns kthnxiwantehscallops,too.
Do da lawdree
Empty da trash cans
Filll alll da gogggie dishies
G…
Gib teh trash to teh garbage-hoomin
Hyde deh evidence of earlyer mischief
Inspekt mah room for contraband, if yew
J…
heat teh pizza,
Juice teh lemmings,
klean teh stove…
Lern my allfy-bits,
make teh beds *whispurrs* (and playify wiff dem)
Nom mai veggablolz
Opun deh door fur deh ladeez
Put mai toyz away
Q…
Quit hedbatting teh liddlol bruddurs
Resist urje tu scarify gamma tu def
Select teh bestest maus tu gib tu teh hoomins
T…
Quit fiten wiff E_M
Really try to be nyce
Speek wiffa indoor voice
T…
Tern awf lites when nawt in rum
Use a towel to wipe hans, nawt shurt
Verifii where u is 24 hrs a day
W…
Wait fer you to come home
Xamin yer clothes fer other animol scents
Yowel in da hallway in da middol ob da nite
Zzzzz wiff littol or no notice
an warsh teh lawdree?
U keeps dat up an Ai gibs U sumfing tu Crai abowt!
Hmmph. No yew woant. I’ll tell Dad!
Hmmpf U nawt eben noze whar him izz! Haow U gunna tell himz?
Cuz…..cuz…hims hassa cellolar fone!
Yah, but ur phonez out of teh minutes!
Mwah hah hah hah!
den I wewel Txt heem!! He haz da unleemeetid txtin fingy … sew der … pthiiiiiip!
ooops – I nawt sure I shudda pthiiiiiiped mi mammma … *hidez unner da bed*
It’s hard to Txt wiff only 1 hand.
Yous iz a ebil ebil purrsun PJ!!!
*Glares at PJ and frows blud awl ober her frum by handless armie*
I don’t want it anymore. *wants to be nice nawt ebil*
*offers some hawt erball tea as an olibbranch*
Y you gabbed eet to GC??? y nawt gib it bak to meeeeeeeee!!!!
Yep, and she’s a liddol “tyde up” at da moment. You cud probly juss go take it. Need a ride ?
*Iz swoonified up der ^^ frum lak ub blud*
aaawwww! *titens CHRG and HGGs*
*runz bai wif deh
dukgoose tayp.rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap, rap!
Dhere, u b saif now!!
mumblesquibblemubbleholpmumblesquibblemubble!
*Pokes a hole* *Putz a straw in so gammacat can breeve*
weeew! *ponders how to go jogging all rapped up*
mebbee u kud praktiss fur deh neggst caddr pillr raices….
hunch.. straiten .. hunch .. straiten
Ai LUV teh caddr pillr raices!!
Yeps and awl dat hunchin and stritenin is gud furr dsa tummy muskols!! I nose I was inna wun ub dose races — berry nards werk — butt more funz den werks!!
an FangQ pjperry!
It’s da leeest I cud do (hopfully stayin offa da cween’s radar)
*runsawaywiffahideeness*
Twips PJ az he runz frum da seen … OOOPSSss sowweeeeeee….
Hey! dat hurtz…I IS A SHE!
Erm … sowweeee agin!!! I no nose howz I madeid dat meestake. I knoed dat yous iz a sheeeee ….
Best be gittin ups afour da Cween returnz wif her goosee tapez!!
Um, fanx, I finx. *grabs E_M’s hand an runnnssss!!*
HAY!!!! Cumz bak heer wif mii HAND!!!
*Chases affer PJ triin nawt ta drips too much blud frum mii handlesss army*
I pwomise I nebber calzz you a he agin!!! Twuz a meestake I tell yous! A meestake… Oh I needs mii hand bak!!!
Nope, I finxo I keep it. Hear’s a shamwow/turnikit.
You you you you gunna KEEPZ MII HAND?????!!! Wut iz you a a a a a a hand steelerer??? Jest cuz I sed “HE??”"
Oh da Hyuge ManneeTee!!!
HALP HALP HALP 911 — SUMWUN!! PJ’s stteelin mii HAND!!!
*Drip drip drip* Oh nose — da blud haz leeked fru da ShamWow… Oh I feelz woooooooozeeeee……
*swooonz* THUNK!
And yoou tripped me. *lleebs da hand fer gammacat to decide*
Whut iz dis? A swooned EM wiffowt bof handz. OMCC.
* Gitz aowt teh nawt sekkund aid kit
Spray teh liquid bandij awn teh bludding stump.
Huks up teh IV tu gib sum blud. *
Oh deer ai iz aowt uf blud…Ai noze!! Ai will Uze teh Arbuklol Kawfee!
* huks up teh kawfee tu teh IV. gitz awt teh bionik hand adn teh sewing kit *
U relax EM Ai haz did dis befoar.
* Sooper teh bionik hand tu teh EM wristbones.
Plugs teh nerbs intu teh sokkits. Sows teh plastik cubbur tu teh skinz. *
Awl Dun. Nawt tu sea if teh noo hand wurks!
Uhhhh. wut??? I suddinlee feelz berry eenerjizez — likee I jest hadda 10 hole pots of Kawfee!!!
Ohhhh…. luk at dis shinee sparkollee hand I haz … pinch pinch pinch …
grab grab grab…
wave wave wave…
shaka shaka shaka …
tipee tipee tipee…
txtee txtee txtee…
hmmmmm.. seemz ta werk OK ….
mama-kitteh has immuniteh to the splortashusness of bebbeh kitteh…ai, howebber, duz not…
*SPLORT*
I has teh not sekind aid – I can helpz?
*dragz in teh CCC.
Luk at deh mess. Tut. tut. tut. (nawt deh faro)
.
*Sweepee, sweepee, sweepeee.
*Scoopee, scoopeee, scoopee.
*Tukkee, tukkee, tukkee,
*Pulling on deh CHRG – snugee, snugee.
*Rapping it tite wif deh dukkee tayp. Taypee. Taypee. Taypee.
.
Dat bedder? Tuk u up in deh floofee pinkee blankee.
heerz a chokklit possum, & a chokklit martoonie.
U b resting noaw. Den u ken go owt & play.
you calle’d, my Cween?
ding dong?
Ai distinklee hur yoo cawling hur!
An hur too sisters, Scoopee and Tukkee!
Oh, plz!!!! wun uv dem iz enuf! Not tu b telling mii dere b moare!!!!
Ai think tehy ar eye dent iccle tripoletz . . .
I feel faynt.
*runz tu bottom uv fred tu see if fyremenz haz arrived yet*
“tut. tut. tut (nawt deh faro)” – snerkelol snort! Gets mii ebree time!
No ersponse – Implied konsent – good!
**sanitizes hans adn nails and feets**
**scoops up brainz**
**rinses in raspberey gingeryale**
**stuffs ‘em alls back inna skull**
**duckytapes the pieces bak together**
**wraps in blankee and administers cimmamon tea intrerveneousley**
Dere – that’s all betterer. Um… has u seen my wristwatch? – is ditital but still makes tiktik sounds…
Uh oh….
Ai NOES! Teh liddlol front legs, teh liddlol pawses, teh wite bib, teh strypees – iz too MUSH!!!
*fink fink fink. Um, dirtee litter bawkses, must pay teh bills tomorrow, Sarah Paylin* Whew, ai fink ai’s saef noaw.
karefull….. dont wanna make urself barf…… dat b wurse dan deh splortz. I don’t think u git ENNNEEE halp kleenin dat up!!
*Falls out ob chair laffin*
You gotz NO busy ness laffin wile iz still bluddin ta def wif one hand!!
Butt – it WuZ reelee funnee!!
Otay — yous rite wuz — I eben cuckolled a bit inna mii dimished state — Ifinkso now i onlee haz about 1 cupz ub blud left inna mii bodee….
Wun cup???
That’z nawt enuf!!!
Heer! ai hav LOTZ. Yoo can hav sum!
*giibbz 3 kwartz ov blud to Elsa_Mama*
Will this too fur a wile???
Hur onlee haz wun cuppa blud…hur haz elebentee cups uf kawfee frum teh IV.
*pant pant pant* I haz a tyred,, butt kin nawt stoppz runnin round inna circols and square inna bokiz and triangols inna inna inaa triangols… anf jumpin upz and downz and sideewaes and diaginols waes….
Halp mee!!
Cuckolled? E_M izza HE???
Ermmmm…. I typified a leetol gyoofy doo too no blud —- sahudda sed I chukoled a leetol….
*blushes wif emm bare ass mints*
OMCC, dis sownds soooo familiar!
Does you has kidlets
Yep, a 14 yr owl boi!!!!! Adolescents is GREAT, iffin yur nawt da adult who haz tu deal wif yu,
Mommeh big brudder tooked mah mousie
himz a big meanie
Gud luck, bebbeh kitteh. Dat nevvur works wif mai mommeh.
*runs in dansing around* YAY! I might be gitting a tiny bakashun dis weekend!
W00t!!! wair u go?? Diz Knee Land?? Pah Rii?? Noo Yahk Sitty???
Izza tini baykayshun…Hur iz goin tu teh Lawst Wagus tu find Elbis.
b shur and take him sum jelly donuts.
No, wii, mii and Chikken Man might bii able to go tu da Red River Gorge and tu our property in Eastern KY tu sii da leaves changin colors!
Wii nawt had a alone time away in 3-4 yrs. Wii nawt can remember when da last tyme wuz!!!
dat sowndz nice!!! deh fawl leefz is awlwayz purdy.
w00t, w00t !!!
an a peenut budder an bakon sammich
chiggen-fryed, ob coarse
Ov CORSE!!
Oooooh – bebbeh kitteh!
*splort*
ohnooooooooooooooooooooes!
i still not can has my CCC license whotodowotodoooowotodo *much wringing 0 tendruls*
*scoops up wif skeeeeeeeee gee all teh brayneyums in area*
*includes miss Terry Us tickytocky thing*
*pours contents 0 clenning bucket into niteshayde’s hedium*
*fwipfwipfwipfwip*
wraps up niteshayde’s braynium areeeyah in tendrils.
oooopsie. i can has leftovers.
hm,mmmm.
*saves dem in teh freezerator incase day be needededed*
Mah heddayke iz gone – but nao dere iz a tikkin fing drivin meh up teh wall.
No wunder sweetpea duzzint haz hur CCC license.
Fankies fur teh thot & teh effurt tho!
Derz sum fyremenz down da fred — maebee dey weel takee yer mind offa da tiktiktokkin …
An maebee dey kin doo a watch etomy …
I neber hurd tendrillz ring b4.
dat Ding! Dong! Ding! Dong! Ding! Dong! Ding! Dong! Ding! Dong! Ding! Dong! kinda drivingz mii nutz.
U kin nok it off ennee tiyme.
Yous cud awlwais tapeify da tendril down ta keeps den frum ringin’
* handz swea’pea teh bawks ub crakor jakz. *
Luk in der. Iz whar Ai gotted mai dubblol nawt spai lisuns tu killifie.
Who’s cellphone is dat?
Stawp cryin oar Ah’ll gibs u sumfin tu cry abowt!
Datz nawt berry nice!!!
*crosses armies and gibs durty luk*
Ah sawed dat!
You wuz sapozed ta seez it!! Not makee much cents ta gib sumwon a durty luk iffin dey nawt seez ett!!!
Whai U wants tu saw dat? Naow EM Haz tu get dat hand sewed bak awn!!
yah. wot she^ sed.
Son, any moar of this silliness and I carry you off by the scruff of the neck like I used to.
Sillyness?? heer???? say it izn’t so!!!
*razes hed slolee — whisperz* Oh mii cween —pweese to halp mii — PJ stoledd mi hand and I iz swooonin frum lak ub blud ….. *swoooonnnn*
Swooning???!?!?!?!?!!
*callz nine elebenteez*
hallo??? iz dis nine lebentee??? Yes, plz tu sending fyremenz.
No, wii not haz a fyer. Y u ask???
Wii needz halp! Elsa_Mama haz swooooninged!!! hur needz fyremenz!! O. U say deh fyremenz KAUZE deh swooning???
Well den wii need lotza fyremenz. I finso dere b sebral peepz u wud like tu swooning intu deh fyremenz.
Yes, fankeez.
O, bai deh way, send a medic, tu. Elsa_Mama b needed a hand.
.
.
.
Ok, u just rest heer. deh fyremenz b heer soon.
*goez tu fix hairz and spritz a liddlol O D Kolonee. *
WEE WOO!!! WEEE WOOO!! (dat b cheezee Fyre Truck sownd FX)
Yay!!! deh fyremenz iz heer!!
*Fayntz intu fyrmentz armz.
Yea Fyremenz!!! *Wabes nice noo shiny bionicol hand wif da sparklee fingiees and superdeedoopperz grip*
Ober heerz meester fyremens — wanna seez mii fancy hand!??!
You TOLD on me???
Ah, YES!! Iz bluddin to DEF wiles yous iz runnin around laffin and lebbin mii hand eberywears butt onna mii army!!!
Iz a beet ub a harse punishmint furr trippin yous ta lets mii be da ded frum no blud lef inna mee bodee!! ifnkso!
Butt(!), you started it!! I was doin a good deed, savin GC’s lifel, wen you attacked me. Den I TRY to be nice an nawt ebil, you tattel.
I eben gabe you back yer stoopy hand (inna roundabout way). Kwit bleedin on me!
Stawp complanin — da cween cawled da fyremenz!!! An heer dey cumz, smile PJ, derz eenuf furr awl ub us!!
Oh good, I habba liddol tension in my shoulders…*batts eyes*
OWWW!!! hey bat yerown eyes!! *mobes ober awai frum dat PJ* *Mutters* boi duz shee holdz a grunge … I nawt tripified herz onna porpose oar nuffin — wuz mostlee a miss stake….
*mobes awai frum E_M, nawt noing about dat new hand*
I’s mostlee sry fer bein harsh. Will werk and play bedder wiff others. *Unpouts*
An eye weel twy berry berry berry berry hardz nawt to tripify peepz inna da footer … an too nawt callz a shees a hees …
Stritches noo hands owt to PJ in peece…
Hey cool, mii noo hand haz a Xtindabol feeturr —
*watched hand Xtind awl da wau ober to PJ, wabes shylee at PJ* Frens agin???
*shruggs*
*wabes back and blows kisses* Frens again.
katchis da kisses — FANKS!!! “walks awae wissolin*
Hai, Ai fixified it fur U. U jus haz tu sine teh inshurance paypurs foar teh Trollz in accownting.
Wii eben waibed teh deduktiblol.
Otay — takes penn — *penn crunchees in haf* Oh… hmmm.. Ifinkso dat I needz ta lern mii own strenff
Yes, but *you* are not.
Awwzz..so cute!
U muss lissen 2 ur mommacat. She is jus lookin out 4 ur well-bean.
an if deys jumps off te bridge, yous gonna go tu?
Awwwwwww that picture was taken in the Netherlands. I miss you Nederland! SNIFF!
Kitteh jus wan b liek ebryone else….