That thing about kilts? All true.
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Wat haz been seen …….
Wat haz been seen?
Congratz to you Anni! I finx da rest ob da werld iz lookin fer da bleech.
U mai be rite dere! Tho teh ownlee skotshman Ai ebber had teh chans 2 chekk awn wuz warin liddle blakk breefs!
It wuz at teh skool dans an hims kilt swingd up….
So u dint approach him frum behind and took matturs in ur own hands, no?
Aifink wen dere iz dansin dey du ware a liddle pare uf breefs, but uvverwiez nawt.
Ah met a guy in teh bar wuns hoo wuz werin teh kilt nd him wuz nawt werin much els!!!
Ai guess himz wuz teh YNG!
Mr. Binky. *snerk*
* scamper scamper scamper *
* micrololfone fudbakk *
AHEM! Iffn ai kin habbing yur tenshuns plzthx???
* puts awai sordid plans wib a kwikness *
Ahem, err… yesh. Nao, as yu mite no, ower belobed lolcatburglar is terning… umm… * czechs paypurs *
WOW! Umm… well, yesh. lolcatburglar is habbing a burfdai TUMORROW!!! * nod nod *
So, teh gud ppl ober at Guinness Piggeh (c) Cheezland Ebents has bin werking rly, rly hard [so far as yu no] awn a fabyoolus partee!!!
Wii kin has Burger Mystery Nite??? O, yesh yesh yesh!!!
Plz tu bii HEER awn teh 6AM Cheezthyme LOL (is noon lolcatburglar thyme EST adn 5pm Piggeh thyme GMT) TUMORROW teh 5st Oktobrrr wib yur fynest cocktayl dresses adn / oar tuckspeedos awn fur a berry, BERRY posh Dinnur Partee!!!
Dere wheel bii YNF (Yung Nekkid Fyremens/wimmins) serbing sordid horse doovers, LAWTS ob shinee fings fur yu playing wib adn, ob corse dere wheel bii a littlol Mystery fur yu tu solbing so plz tu bii peeling yur eyes fur cloos, k? fankies.
Nao, Scrooge McPig, lolpigburglar adn ai has sum umm… err… sum seekrit fings wii has tu doing rite at teh start ob teh partee so wii wheel beeing a littlol beet layte… uh huh, yesh… * lukks arownd nerbussly *
So, iffn yu has a prezunts yu wanting tu gib, oar a littlol show yu wanting tu put awn oar a sawng yu wants tu sing oar whutebber, plz tu feline free!!!
Wen yu arrybe, plz tu telling us awl whut yu is waring adn whut prezunts yu has brotted fur me, err… ai meens fur LCB, uh huh, yesh.
Anee kweshuns???
Hay! Scrooge!!! Hyde dose plans!!!
Sry… Anee kweshuns???
Otay — sew dats elebenty in da mornin heer in the middol ub da You Ess Aye – (CST) … infinkso dats rite…
Eye weel tries ta make it. RL haz been berry berry bizzy and dey wnats mee to werk naw at werk — ta makee upz furr awl da tymes off wif mee Matt …
ZA beet eerlee fur da kocktale dress – butt I hab a berry necee wiun– wif lotsa ub shinee blak beeds … ifinkso I weel wears dat wun…
An wile I haz bean pakin furr ta [utz mii haus up furr sael I founded LOTS an LOTS ub glitterz and shiny shiny finks! I breing den awl. We kin jest toss da glitterz in frunt ub a fan and glitterify da hole partee!! Da bee berry purty ifinkso!
Nope. Well, yesh. About ellebenty, but ai curb mai curioseetee and wait until tomorrow.
Ai wiil nutt be a bell tu maek it foar Burger Mystery Nite becuz uv RLS–sew kin yu jist tell mii awl about it naow? Kthnx.
Nawt uh gud idea tew walk ober kitteh wif kilt awn aifinkso.
Dey liek to bat at hangy down fings.
Oooo! De very thought bringz teers tu mai eyes!
[hands africat uh shamwow]
Fanks NC66! Ai lyke yur scaree faice! Very Halloweenie!
An Irish ffren tole me why de Scotsmen wares kilts. He say its acawse de sheeps can heer zippers.
So whut u’re sayin’ is that they’ll be sparrin’ wif ur sporran?
Ee! See above teers in eyes komment! Nao ai need an otter shamwow!
[hands africat uh shamerkin]
Dats only slightly better dan dey bein’ teh pyoobik pugilists aiguesso.
“Dey liek to bat at hangy down fings.”
OH mai CC. reminds me uv when ai wuz gettin married and Catlik Church sez, u gots to do owr program nawt-sekkund to mayke shur u iz reddy to get married an all.
The cupple whut usuallee did teh s-e-x part uv teh presentayshun wuz out uv town, so we got treeted to “Chrys” an his wife explayning to us EXACTLY why kittehs shud nawt be allowed in bedruums.
If onlee there reeleee wuz such a thing as brane bleech…
Here’s why else kittehs shouldn’t be in teh bedrum during that “speshul time”:
Attempt to join in.
Bring their frenz to watch.
Color commentary too colorful.
Don’t respect teh “No Smoking” sines.
E…
Ebil Laffin ruin ds mood
Flyin Furr cauzez sneezin
Ginormus Eyes starin atchoo
H…
Hazza hongry; NOW!!!
Insists on ticklin feet
Joins in snugly afterglow
K…
Keep trying to save mommy frum attacker
Lafter counteracts viagra
Make biskits awn bared tender parts
N…
Nawty bits exposed to teh pointy endz
Open to attack!!!
Possible punctures by pointy endz.
Q
Mai dinnur iz startin 2 smell kuukked. Bai fur naow!
Bai-bai! Happy noms!
YEA!! Wuns ub mii goggies — da olderer wun Lady Jane — haz madified frens wif Pebbles and BamBam (da kitties).
Da kittehs adn da Lady Janer awl sleeped inna mii bedz last nite!! I wiz holding da Jane ta keepz her frum gettin too frenly …
BamBam stretched out heem llllooonnnngggg leg berry far and booped LJ rite onna da nose – berry gently wif no pointy endz!! Wuz da funneh! 
Jazzy puppeh steel chaisfiez dem
ohai Elsa_Mama! ai donut fink we has met befur, but ai is bery happi tu hear that yu hab such a happi fambily uf kitteh adn goggie – adn ai’m shur that Jazzy will come awond sun
Aye laddie! Iz cawld goin re-jee-men-tul!
iz kwyte reefreshin, akshooly!
Aive herd it cawld goin co-mann-do!
It b nun ob ur buzzniss ifn ai find it reefweshin!
Iz liek naychurul aer kondishuning!
heerz teh burfday fairy to say HAPPEE BURFDAY to Sacredflesh adn Scarletkitty an evreewun else hoo haz a burfday today!
i haz bring yummy fudjy burfday cakes, fluffy anjul fud caeks wif fresh berreez an wippy kreem, iskreem, sparkly party punch, poynty shiny party hats wif pompoms on top, an the LIVE-AKSHUN WAK-A-TROLL game!! dont wurry, it duznt hurt teh trolz if yoo only hits tehm on teh hed. plus tehy gets owt ob teh facktree to get sum fresh airs an sunshine. also goodie bags filled wif yoyos taht wissle bagpipes songs wen tehy yoyo, liddle windup racing dukkies, kandee, an puffy trol-doll stikkers (teh gud trolz taht are teh liddle dolls wif brite-culord hairs) wif googly eyes!! an a big swish ob teh burfday wand to making all yor burfday wishes come troo!
———-***¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭****
oh hai lolfriends!
Ohai too yoo too!
Ohai, Kat900! Nice to meet you!!
hai upfi and africat!!!!!
Ohai KAT900! Walkum 2 dis happi plaes.
tank oo vereh mush, annipuss!
Curree~uss Kitteh
diskubburz dat sum kewsschunn
shoodz nawt habz ansurrrz!
Curree~uss Kitteh
duskubburz dat Hayree Gyez
shoodz nawtz wayr shoart skurtz!
Curree~uss Kitteh
diskubburz dat himz prefurrz
Prittee Wun’s cump’nee!
Jack.
ohai Jack! dat is a lubberly poim, aifinkso
win!
I saw wut you has der. (an I rilly wish I hadnt! Mai ayes, mai ayes!!!)
Wat haz been seen, can be obseen.
LOL!!!! Elebbenty!
Troo, dat!
between that thing & that thong…obseen enough!
ht tp://images.cheezburger.com/completestore/2009/10/4/128991576737608340.jpg
Seamz approp..aprop.. rite abowt heer!
*whack*
OK clebberkloggs! Ai doan’t do trix!
That remines me of when a fren of mine attended some Capitol Hill ceremony or other for some Scottish-American reason or other. She was seated in a close-in row to teh slightly raised platform and noticed that teh ‘merican dignitaries what was waring teh kilts for teh occasion was struggling sit in a way that keeped their dignified nawty bits covered. OTOH, shen noted that one of teh dignified guests, Sean Connery, also in kilt, was sitting very relaxified-but-gentleman-like and in such a way that his kilt draped elegantly across his dignified guest naughy bits.
Kind of a win-lose proposition, that.
Ooohh! I wouldn’t mind a littlol peeky peeky at Sean C., even iffen he iz a bit old(er).
Teh sporran iz sposed 2 way doun teh `propriut bit uv teh kilt wen it iz wared rite.
*steels Sean Connery’s sporran*
Now we need a breeze from the right direction. Heeee!
Sean Connery is teh win-win, aifinkso!
Teh linkee doesn’t wurk …. wah!!!!
Clikk awn NC66′s smiley – dat werks!
An mai linkie werks iffn u cloes teh gap.
MIND TEH GAP. *pause*
MIND TEH GAP. *pause*
MIND TEH GAP. *pause*
MIND TEH GAP. *pause*
Teh laydee hoo keeps sayin dat awn teh Lunnun Unnergrownd muss get awflee board!
oooh! It’s been a long time since I has been in Lunnon. Back then, it was a man whut says it.
So either the man gotted bored and quit and they hired teh lady, or teh man gotted a s-e-x change opperashun.
Ai duzn’t yooze teh unnergrownd atawl, soe u aer prollee rite an it iz a man. Aifink Ai lass went awn teh choob abowt 30 yeers agow!
‘Tis first time I’m sportin’ me tartan,
And I fell like a brace Scottish spartan.
But the wind on me willy,
Is drivin’ me silly.
Just give me my Levis to fart in! – Kurt Bestor
LOL!!
Bwaaahahaa! Stawp! Now ai gotta go to the nb.
runsawaywifaquikness
Ok, i put dis heer. seemz az gud a spot az enny.
Naice butt!!!!
Yah, wut ^ hur sed!
Mai fadur bakt up intu a thistle wunce wen wereing a kilt.
I finkso poor kitteh needs sum gushy fuds, sparkley water, anna gud brush, brush, pet, pet, snorgle tu make him furget awl teh terribuble fings him saw.
*Hands Luvmeecs da snorkel*
TTFN cheezpeeps. Headin hoam frum wurk. *waves*
Hmmm..kitteh shud make list of tings hooman should not ware.
#1 No hooman should wear leather trowsers (unless yor Elvis)…
#2 tie wit plaid shirt….
#3 pls not ware cufflinks in shirt not meant fur cufflinks (wit buttons on yor sleeves..)…
#4 plz nawt ware sandles fer men wiff pleh feet!
Oar short pants wiv hayree leggs oar barikuss banez.
#4 FURRR!!!
(Unless yer a kitteh)
yeah or unless you hooman who wants yer face shredded….
# 5 pls don’t be waring shirt an tye wiv jeans (wat are you – a geografee teecher?)
#6 plz keep underware…under!
# 6 toob tawps!!!!!
ifinkso tehy shuld habbing a rool at my groshree store taht wering a toob top makes yoo inelijible to reseev teh senior day diskownt.
… especially if u is a man. *nods*
#7 don’t be walking round wiv shoelaces undone – you dont looks cool you looks like an idiot…
#8 shorts wiff black sox.
#9 Ware ur pantz AT UR WASTE, NAWT UR BUTT!
#10 Butt nawt ware pants up to chest!
#10 Unless u gots tummy u can bownse kwarter awf ov, nawt to be warin tite an/oar short shurts!
I nawt wanna see ur fatz, I gots enuf of my own.
#11 No BIG hats at da theater.
#11a no hats indors including te baseball hats
#10 men wiv ponytayls (controvershal, Iz knows)….
Az lawng az dere keept kleen an brushed wunse in a whiel, I nawt haz problum wif dat.
Egg-sepshun – Ifn u goin bald onna tawp, teh ponytayle nawt mayk up foar it.
Jes sayin.
I agree. Was ok 20 yers ago.
U noe wat dere iz unner a ponytayle……
Hay! I haz ponytayle rite nao….
(ifinkso her meend a ponytayl wered by a old man)
Yiss – Ai haz wun partikyooler man in mynd – him is growin a bald an haz a ponytayl abowt a fut an a haff lawng. PLEH!
# Elebenty(ish) – No ritin awn teh butt, plz.
Ponytayls on menz only ok if yer Johhny Depp.
I begz to diffur.
I has seen sum menz dat luuk gud wif teh ponytaylz.
smudgie has to go sleepies – tanks fur input.
bye bye
‘Nite.
Haz plezzint dreemz.
No pajammer pantz owt in publik.
“Lad I nawt kno ware ya been, butt I see ya wun nawt-sekkund pryze!”