Whack-a-mole?
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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
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Cheezburger Network Blog
Juss trie it….
Hay! Congrats at teh tawp ov dis brayde annipuss, winnin bai a wiska!
ai wuz wahnderz whair teh conga rats wer.
Tehy bee in inn tents seive traynin furr teh cheezstock consert aifinkso
*conga rats lyne up, still in teh floury shirts adn flaired trowsis*
cum on yoo rats, dans furr us, lukk livelee
**tears of joy leaking frum eyes**
dai alwais luk sew beautyssfuhl
Thx mmm!
Kitteh Range
Kittehz eggspresshun saiz it all:
Obey me monkeygrrl
yu wheel be feline mai poyntee ends…
first the clawz and den the teefs
adn den bits ob teh oben
hawt-stuf kitteh!
Kitteh is waytin furr yu
Non-priority kitteh is put on teh back-burner.
Eben wurser – IN teh bak burner.
Wif it b-ing Awgust, n so many peeps moobing, kleening teh stobz n fings, ai bet laws uf kittehs cheking owt teh M-T boksez, open stob burnur finggies, sootkaasez awn teh floar, etc., etc.
So mutch funz 4 kittehz…
So mutch entertaanmint 4 staff peeps. *^^*
Hugz n cheezluv,
{{{{{freelion/wiz}}}} hey buddy, i fink of u often.
an will suun express himz displezure at dat wif himz pointee endz
That will move him up on teh priority list, fer shure.
Plz not to be discriminating against deh kitteh kind
No, not discriminating. Just taking teh priorities in order.
Whut priorities, u axe? Well, lessee…
Acting out scenes from M*A*S*H
Beating on t-r-o-l-l-s
Carrying on in a silleh but totally fulfilling way
Defrosting Krelm’s memories
E…
Elevating teh elebatro controlls
Flogging teh phlonquis
Geroffing teh stoves
Hiding the phlonquais helper until time to yuse it
I….
Inviting ebbreewun over fur a partay
Jumping frew hoopz
Kissing awl deh kyooot Cheezmenz … SCHMOOOZ!!!
L….
Lyin down havin a sleap
Maikin gud yoose of teh spair tyme
Nomming teh cheezburgers
Openin teh bere canz
P…
Purrformin belleh rubz
Quitely stealin yur hartz
Relaxins in teh warm sunbeamz
S…
In best ig gate teh nawty barn
Joyning teh dansdansdans
Kerrit kaek in teh brakerum!
Lolling abaot
M…
Ur prioritehz disappoint deh kitteh
he comes furrst and last and ebry number in between
kthx
And just WHARE on teh kitteh’s priority list is I? Hmmm? Is a 2-way street u knoes.
*ponders*
Um, ackshully, wif kitteh, is one-way, private kittehs only, KEEP OUT, severe tire damage street.
Weeeeellll kitteh’s priyoritees cud be summfing laike dis:
Arnser awl kitteh’s need imeediatelee
Bee reddy to arnser awl kitteh’s rekwests
Cum at wonce wen kitteh calls yoo
Devote awl yur tyme to kitteh
E…..
Ern lawts uv monies furda gushfuds
Feed da kittehs at dems rekwest
Get moar gushfuds frum da stoar
H…
no is a wun wai street, kitteh is deh boss
U eggsist to serve himz needz
Free-range kitteh?
delishus an nootrishus
No, there is only one range. Is u still feeling teh effects of teh party on the last lol?
o gud, dere yu is… umm is wii teh reddy tu tell ebberywon abowt umm… taht fing wii has planned?
Fing??? O.O
an werser: a PLAN!
PB2K!!!!! Hao yu is? Its gud tu see yu bak!!!!
U mean wif teh ceremony and teh rings and stuffs?
* czechs payperwerk *
umm… no… teh otter fing!
*bownses*
TEL, TELL, TELLL!!! plEAsssssssseeeeee!
I wants to see teh ceremony wif teh rigns and stuffs! Nd see yu feeds eech ovver cayke!
teh caek feeding is bound tew b a reel mess!
Oh. That thing.
But u should make a note to make sure that all teh hoola hoops is teh painted in time for teh dedication ceremoney for teh LCB Playground for teh Deff Chillrens.
teh wuns yu reed to? Wen u rn’t making shadow aminals fur the blindie?
I was taking teh blind chillrens to teh art museum. They can come to teh noo playground also. That’s why we is painting teh hoola hupes.
O, but ob corse! Ai has lefted Mick in charge ob taht.
Nao, iffn yu is awl reddy tu answer kweshuns… ai shall go maek teh nownsmint, k?
Plz to hurry. I has to go get some lunches.
ooo ai wheel has:
Applol Joos (steel warm, freshly skwoze)
Baycon Sangwich
Cheezburger WIB extry picklols
Dubblol chokklit Muffin
E…
eggs, debiled
french fries!
goat cheese filled roasted red peppers
hot pancakes
I…
Icee creemz!
Jellee donuts
Kumquatz
Limburger cheez (snif…maybeenawt)
M…
Makarohni cheez
Nems wif teh veggy fillingz
Ommmletz (sordid flavrz)
Peekan adn tawfee pye
Q…
Sry, piggeh. Teh snack bar was all outta those things. Here, I brang u a hi-fiber, lo-flavor granola health bar.
(Whiskering) Duz you meenz W.C.H.B.C.F.S.P.R.L.S.O.Y.Y.Y? Cuz in choiring mines want to knoe.
*q da choirz*
ai wanz tu noe
ahh wantz tu noooo
ahhhh waaahns tewewew noe
tuu tuu tuuu noe nooooe!!!
*jumpeez inna ayr whyl tweestin lyk en ackrobatt – dis da gymnaztik quoir*
That was one heck of a party, all right. Oooh, my head…
*goes to make some hot tea*
Oh great. How’d my teapot get all furry? I must be hallucinating.
Heh! Dass a commun problem aroun here!
Really? And what about losing your pants? Is that common?
*suddenly feels at home*
Too bad Maus isn’t around. You are entitled to a free debriefing.
It seems I have plenty of people willing to “help” with that. I’ve even tried locks and kevlar. At one point, to cut back on tailor expenses, I went with velcro seams.
hmm… the way I hear it, you’re all too willing to self-debrief…..
Nasty rumors! I’m a reformed, fully pants-ed Brewski!
ah, but haz yoo ever been debriefed using teh cone ob silence, duck tape, an debriefing flooid? until yoo haz, yoo haz never reely been debriefed.
LOL
♫ Happy birthday to you! ♪
This debriefing procedure sounds almost as complicated as giving birth.
O hai Brewski. How u is? No post-partum depression, I hope?
Just peachy-dandy, thanks!
What do you recommend for stretch marks? Lotion, maybe?
*raids GP’s cubicle*
Here, try some expsensive anti-wrinklol creme. That might do the trick.
*runs up, applies anti-wrinklol creem to Brewski’s stretch marks, runs awai wif a kwikness*
*wonders how Brewski managed to get stretch marks on his ears*
taht musta been wun big babby
{{{lunarmommy and 4point5kittehs}}}
I’ll have the sexiest ears in cheezland!! I can’t wait to show them off!
Uh oh, the big bad moderators didn’t like my thanks-for-the-nice-ears post!
*sulks*
it’s ther now! iz cawz yoo used the “s*x” wurd, az in suss*x england or earl ob ess*x, all ob wich will also get yor commints moderated. but i gess teh moderators dessided our morals iz not thretened by teh idea ob s3ksy eers.
It wus teh dormouse, aifinkso. Him tuk a nap in dere.
Wow-ie! SIX WAY DOUBLE-BRAIDY THING! Way to go, y’all!
WOWZERZ!
6-waa makramaa! WOOT! WOOT!
It’s awf 2 teh ty booteek 4 awl ub u!
Meenwhyl, taht kitteh duzint luk too happytail, ai finkso. ;o)
Hugz n cheezluv,
I fink him monkeygrrl is moving, and kitteh is staging a sit-in to purrtest
Cat, cat in the range
wer teh pans an teh hottee pads plai…
Wher seldum is hurd
An unlollabul wurd
And teh cats are teh bosses all dai.
an nyte tew!
Wheer seldum iz hurd,
a diskurajing wurd…
Moar Wowzerz!
D
4point5kittehs maaks it a seben-waa makramaa!
Whu sed it kudint b dun?! *^^*
Plz 2 pik owt yur fab’rit treets in teh ty booteek.
Konga-ratshumalaashuns, too, 2 Annipuss 4 teh tawp spawt!
Wut wud u leik 4 yur winnurz treet, Ann?
Hugz n cheezluv,
whack a mole winner gets one free face removal
Xtreem maekober!
kitteh edishun
Dats rite, jus put teh pan full of chicky rite here. It’ll be finished in no time.
* scamper scamper scamper *
* unfulrs banner ober teh Cheezland Safareh Park gaytes *
“W.C.H.B.C.F.S.P.R.L.S.O.Y.Y.Y”
* Micrololfone Fudbakk *
Ahem! Ai kin has yur tenshuns plzthx?
HAY! Plz tu STAWP playing whack-a-troll adn lissen! pfft…
“We can has beneefit consert fur stoopy pleh reel lyfe syndrome??? O, yesh yesh yesh!!!”
Taht’s rite, cheezfrends!!! Wii can has “CHEEZSTOCK”
Awn Mundane teh 31nd Oargust awn teh 6AM Cheezthyme LOL wii can has teh… gratest… show… EBBER! (prolly)
Wii wheel be habbing lawts ob yur fayborit cheezland classic sawngs adn sum gnu offerings tu!!!
Plz tu be dere oar be skware!!!
Fankies!
clappity!!!!! wee that will b teh fun!!!
Cheeztastic, even!
*kitteh at teh bak raizes her paw*
Um, will Mick be dere? *wif a hoepful*
* slow, sad hedshake *
Sadlee… yesh… hims sed hims wud crai iffn ai deed nawt let him owt taht dai…
Az long as he duzzn’t gib sekoority to teh rabid Basement Weesuls, lyke he did at teh Catamont Festibal.
MIck is hard tew get rid uv, unless u is looking fur him. so i bet hims will b there
*singsong voice*
“DK has a crush on Mick, DK has a crush on Mick”
*giglols*
Nawt a crush – ai just wanna see if he’ll bring bak awl ob skwirlee’s missing unnerwares…
o. okeh tehn….
pfft!
I gave him urs, DK!
Mine is all lokked up nise and safe….
I wants a Cheezstock t-shirt!!!!!!
Ai wants a Cheezstock bobblol hed sumfing!
hmm, mebbee tehr will being a cheezstock boblolhed mick?
I thot dat bai daffynishun, Mick b boblolhedded….
We could makes one wif teh extry-bobbly lips. Would ur
trollsfactry workers be able to make some in time for teh event?i’ll put tehm to werk on it rite away!! hoo wants to go help motivate tehm? *passes owt sparkly neon-colured wips*
*giglol* craks whip in air * begins tew feel a stirring ov unfamiliar yet delishos feelings*
*Putz on bell bottomz, beedz adn paintz peas simblol on fais.
*startz humming:
Let mii take u down, Kuz I’m going tu Strawberry Feeldz
Nuffink iz reel and nuvving tu git hung abowt.
Strawberry Feeldz fur evvur.
Well I came upon a cat ov CC
who wuz walking a long teh road
and I aksed him Kitteh tell me where yu are go ing
This he told me
Well I’m going to te Safari Park
Gonna join in a kitteh band
Gonna get back to teh jungle land
set my kitteh self free
If u wants to rite a song for teh festival — and this would do nicely — plz to rite to LCB, Musiclol MisDirectifier, at lolcatburglar at gmail dot com. kthx
♪ If you’re goin to San Fran Sisco
Bii sure to wear some kittehs in your hare
If you’re goin to San Fran Sisco
You’re gonna meet some gentle kittehs dere
For dose who come to San Fran Sisco
Summertime wull be a love-in dere
In teh streets of San Fran Sisco
Gentle kittehs wiv flowurs in deir hare
All akross teh nationz sush a strang vibrationz
Kittehs in motion
Deres a hole genurasion wiv a nu xplanasion
Kittehs in mosion kittehs in mosion
Fur dose hoo come to San Fran Sisco
Bii shore tu wear sum flowurs in yur hare
If you come to San Francisco
Summurtime wull bii a luv-in dere
If yu come to San Fran Sisco
Summertime wull bii a luv-in dere ♪
Clappityclappity and all that, but plz to not be giving teh peeps teh preview until we has collectifies their tikket moneys!
Dis is jus teh ruff drafts! It needs tu bii polished an shinee!
ai haz emayoed u a sawng
o mai! AfriCat an booklion, ur sawngs r awsum an win! mush bedder tahn myne!
Butt (!) o wel, sumwun haz tew bee teh fill-in akt beteeen teh majur starz!
Wii don hav a stern-smilee faice oar ai wud bii usin eet! Nawt tu bii puttin yurself daown. Yu is wun ov teh mostest talunted cheezpeeps ai kno. Serioslee. Doan mak mii come ovur dere an tikklol yu, ai wull doe eet!!!
ai duz haz sum talints butt aifink sawng parrodees mite nawt bee wun uv tehm. Butt ai haz tyme tew wurk awn my sawng afore teh sho.
An ,
o yeah, dewnawt freaten mee wif a guud tyme! 
Will there b cheez?
I’m in!
I’tll be 3 days of cheez and lubs.
and mud too?
Mud? U’ll be soaking in it!
I’tll be teh greatest show in earth!
*^^*
ahhhh … bliss …
oh, taht will be teh awsum an win!! i needs a kyoor for teh RLS.
*vent ahed*
i kant WAYT until dis ratzenfratzen annibersary party my parints are throwing for tehyselfs iz over. my sister had to sending out all teh inbitayshuns an rekwests for stuffs for a memory buk for tehm, but i iz teh wun hoo gets all teh responses an all teh hedakes taht goze along wif all teh sit chew wayshuns taht arize frum taht!!! grr. teh party iz a weekweekweek frum yestirday an tehn it will be over wif!!! yay!!! (i iz glad my parints iz happily marrifyd for 50 yeerz, but dis party fing iz turning owt to be a hedake
)
luking forward to teh awsum consurt!!
{{{lunar mommy}}}
Heer, lay bak in dis swoonin chare…
* calls YNG over to rub LM’s temples *
it will b over soon
ahhhhhh…..
fank yoo princess mu, iz just wut i needed.
*calls anuzzer YNG ober to rub LM’s feetsies*
*calls anuvver YNG to mayek the memree buk fur her*
*putz finnerz in teef adn whistlolz
Fweeeeee!!!
Moar YNGz needed!!! STAT!!!
*poyntz tu wun YNG: U, go git LM a refreshing bevridge!!
*poyntz tu nuzzer YNG: U, fan LM wif deh giant palm frond!!
*poyntz tu YNG standing rownd lukking gud, but kunfuzzlolated: U, dere!! Wut u standing rownd 4?? Kant u see dis wummin in distress???? Go whispur sweet nuffingz in hur eer.
ahhhhhhhh…….
We cudnyt get all togither for mah parents 50th, so we pooled a bunch of munneys an sent tehm on a hot date – we had a limozeen pik tehm up an taek tehm to a fansee restront wif no prysses on teh menyoos an tehn the limozeen drove tehm arownd Feenix an tehy sat in the back an necked.
It was sooooo kyoot!
*runsobberwifakwikniss an gits zippoe*
(w w w .moderati.com/zippo.html )
aifink mebbee teh blyngee cayse iz uhpropee.. ahproap… reellee nyce!
*happytayl dansdansdans*
Ai haz teh dai orf adn dat’s 10 oklok mai tiem…ai can has funz wif mai cheezfrends at cheezstock! Nao wehre’z mai taidai shurt adn mai lurve beeds?
new stove inspekshun looks like FAIL, sir.
That will be elebenty seben minnies for the inspekshun. Thirtyseben elebenty munnies for the replacement.
bills are net 3. returned checks are charged dubbleelebenty. We do not accept payment in kind.
ur nawt sew kynd?
*skwinty eyes*
not wen it comes to munni3s, no sir.
will yoo aksept paymint in toona?
wii aksept menny forinn currencies, including toona, gushiefud, and sammon. We aksept sum turkeys, but only if they come with baycons. No livr, thankyew, that is not a recognised foreign currencie.
Strypee Tawm Kitteh
naymd ‘Butch’ habz claymd Beeg Wyte Bawkz
az himz vayree owanz
Lawtza nyss playssez
2 Napz andz ekksploarz b4
Hewminz mess feengz up!
Strypee Kitteh Butch
tellz Hewminz, “Dis mai Bawkz! U
needz 2 getz Urz oawn!!!
Jack.
ifinkso any tawmkitteh naymed “butch” gets wuteber him wants!
WIN!
git yer own – yep. that’s exactly wut he’s saying
iz et jhus mai ore iz da kitteh a lehdel faht
Kitteh is not fat, is floofy.
So it’s just u wut is teh fat. Not that there’s anything rong wif that.
hims muscular
Nah, himz juss floofy!
sewry. mai ketteh haiz smalz floof. ai furgahts abowt teh floofynessess.
Is nothing to be teh sry about. We can see if we can find a floof donor for ur kitteh.
ai tink dats mai kitteh iz goods. hiz floof iz supah sawft juhst nawt sew floofy
buht tanks fur teh thawt of floof. floof iz alwais neededed sumwair.
r u SURE???
I has PLENTEH of extra floof I can donate to anyone hoo needs it… ANYONE? Bueller???
If yu noes sumbudy taht needs sum, LMK – Iz got lots to share.
On teh cowch, on teh pilloes, on teh curtins, on teh carpit…
Mai flooff let me show it yu!
ais behleaves teh CCC shud stokpail awl teh extrah floof. Itz wuld beh purfect fur teh splort recuverery. der are tuuu manys kyootness kittehs dat caus teh splorts.
MamaC’s floof is IN mai carpit!
tu bad teh carpeht iz nawt maide of teh floof.
soon enough, it might as well be … it currently looks a littlol drrty – I’m waiting until MamaC’s black furr covers it entirely so I can say: ‘Oh look! I can has new black rug!’
*shrugs*
paw craft like that takes time, I know.
under deh sofa, under teh bed, under teh fridgurator wif teh milk botlol rings…