Nature abhors a vacuum, but not as much as cats do.
Picture by: dunno source. Caption by: cutekittenkyti via Our LOL Builder
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“Nature abhors a vacuum,
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DIE YOU SOUL-SUCKER……….DIE!!!!
*runs to hied unner teh cowch*
NOESSSSSSSSSS!!!
Teh cowch..It R Fugleeeeeeeeee
Iz dat wutz keping yu up awl nite?
i’ve seen worse……..
.
not gonna admit where, but I’ve seen worse.
Sum ub my fugliest couches were da mostest comfy.
Wii hadda nawga-hied cowch way bak inna day.
It wuz a golden-yeller.
Wen I wuz little my mommakat bought a golden yellow crushed velvet with black ornate pipeing couch an love seat set. Wuz HORRINDUZ!! Shii thot it wuz fit fur da qweens howse. Howebber it wuz da 70′s.
My mommmycat ussta hab a plastic yellow sofa. A person cud really get stuck iffen its short wearin season.
my mommi haz floofy tan couch, viry nyce fur takyn naps awn
OH, that iz bad! I haz sit awn those an thot da skin awn da back ub my legs were gonna bii ripped owf! OUCH!
Yesh, fugly an uncomfterble.
An just try an tayke a nap on wun. It mite bii 40 degrees in da howse, but yu will wake up in a pool ub sweat. Iz awful.
Hab u been 2 my hoouse?
*snerk* here in teh VLC, 40 degrees is teh HOT!! Reely!
that little difference in C and F, 40 can mean either sweater weather or puddle of sweat.
Ooh, teh memries of teh rippin noyses wehn yu stood up!!! LOL!
Ai tink iz areklinor. Haf az fuglee.
kitteh will have revenge.
.
oh yess, kitteh shall triumph.
Conga-ratz, Dan, awn leedin teh tye!
U wants drinkees an danses?
Nobuddy haets it az much az cats do!
Sept maibe dawgz nd gramaz hoo ware grene shuz.
An haz bloo hare.
ai duz nawt has bloo hare. iz dul mausee brwon/gray
Nd if ai putz kulur awn it wil be purrpul.stn.
I went purple a few yeerss ago, on purpluos.
Win Ai wuz a kidleet, r ministrer’s wife had teh labender harez. Ai fawt it wuz luvlee, adn wantid mine taht kulur win Ai growed up.
Iz strange, da sownd ub vacuum nawt bug mii much wen I iz runnin it, but wen sumwun else iz runnin it, it annoys da crud owt ub mii.
Nature abhors fuglee interier deezine also
GMAT?
izzat a lolcollege entrance exam???
.
*snicker*
*FAIL*
*sigh* well, there goes mah hopes of bein’ a doctor. *snerk*
.
(ya do know I was kiddin’………….right?)
Yep, butt I waz thinkin my fail lookt a liddol harsh.
Somtimes my lack of computer savey combined with lolspeak…I feel very inart in inaaart tic …not clear expressing fings.
(ifinkso tahts why we iz usually gibbing eech ovver teh benefit ob teh dowt an figyurz it iz prolly just teezing an joking
)
I was hopin’ so, that’s why I rolled with it like that. I vaguely remember havin’ to take my entrance exam for grad. school……about 6 months after I’d already been in. was kinda messed up, but amusing how I missed the first one.
*Snicker Snerkz*
wayull, it was more like hung-over (epically) in my professors kitchen eatin’ eggs with the rest of the survivors of the aftershow strike party. bulllwhips were involved.
Oooh, plz elaborate!
well, imagine if you will, a number of future stage-combatants, most of which are in various stages of inebreiation (drunk), and the prof. brings out his collection of bullwhips, *aside* ya ever tried to work an eight foot bullwhip? it’s a lot of work *back to front* and as this is in north Louisiana there are some epic class trees with roots that run along the surface of the ground. booze, unfamiliar weapons with very strenous techniques and lots of torque involved, and tree roots, leaves, pine needles and other detritus.
.
several peeps ended up……somewhat other that vertical, sometimes coiled/tangled up in thier own whip. I managed to give myself a “lovely” welt across one cheek.
.
ah…….to to young and foolish….and scarred, bruised, contused, and confused (why do I taste leather?!?!).
dan haz a very intresting life, ifinkso
I’ve seen and done some odd things I suppose, half I don’t easily recall unless prompted, so ya have PJP to thank for this one.
Hmmmm. a taste uv leather….. kud b fun
i not had to take a test to get into grad skool (finkso for wut i wuz doing it wuz opshunal) but tehy made up for it wif teh tests to get owt.
Dat lamp! It hurts ussssssssssssssssssssss!
srsly. Too much going on. If I were that kitteh I’d probably shred the lampshade, the recliner and wallpaper (at least 2 out of 3). That way I could avenge the vacuum attack while simultaneously giving my human reason to redecorate.
ai fink ai kuld “maibe” lib wif teh wallpayper….butt teh kouch and lampshayde – NAWT!!
Who decorated dis place? ARRGGH!!
yew fail to back-orff meh, ahn ah weill leava nahstay sooprize inyer bed
Such az
A dead mousy
barfed up fuds
Cat toiz rubbd in kitteh lider
D…
Dizzgusting fingz ai fownds awtsyde
Elebenty harebawlz
Fevvers frum yer duster
G…
Gross disgustin barf balls
heinios stanze on da carpet
ickey sticky stuff 4 u to step in
j…
Jay-burd fevvers….a warning
Kill-ed (extra ded) burdies…a further warning
Lemmings…….wounded, but alive………and angry about it.
M…
Mani (angry) lemmings leaping
Nasty kibbols dinner
Owful looks an attitubes
P…
Perturbed Owlz
Quite a large number uf unidentifyablol fingz
Retchid damp hairy fingz
Snakez, partlee eetid
Thum tax
Unsertifyed sir tiffy catz
Vaguelee wreckagnizablol peesez uv ur chekbuk
Way moar hairblols dan u kin imajin
Xpress mail in tiny peesez
Yur favrit dress in shredz
Zookeeneez, pre-nommed
Yeah! cwmu FTW!
J. sry…U rule!
Fankeez!!
I figgered dere wuz nobuddy rownd tu finnish it off.
I wuz ablol to teech Josie nawt to be skeered of teh vakyoom cleenur.
I wish I could teach mt kittehs how to USE teh vaccuumm cleaner.
No kiddin.
U werk awl day, butt dey stay hoam an nawt do ennyfing!
And teh main things that get picked up is teh cat hairs and teh tracked kitteh litters.
Mien iz prittee much teh reezin we hasta use teh bakyuum cleener in teh nawt sekkund plaec… an awl teh furs killifies teh cleeners.
I still haz da cardboard kitteh skratcher, dat dey lub, howebber, dey spread cardboard bits awl obber da dark green carpet. I haz threatened tu throw it in da trash, but dey LUV it!
yesh, if move the cardboard scratcher an inch they come running to defend it!
*shakes head in agreement* Baby kat tuk a long nap awn it lastnite, ebbentho shii iz much wider den it is. Nawt sekkund thing dey du wen coming in da front door is scratch, skratch, skratch, den shed, shed, shed da kardboard unner dere nails.
Ai trai dat fur lawng lawng tiem but nebbur hapunz. ai hire a MAN finelee. Iz so gud tu se a man du da vakum nd dust nd mawp. iz wurf lebentee munniez fur shur.
culd yew cume teech mai goggie??
Awl I did wuz turn teh vakyoom awn wen Josie wuz inna chayre oar awn teh bed (awf teh floor).
I stood between hur an teh vakyoom an pettid hur, an tawlked calmlee to hur, assurin hur dat mahm wud nawt let teh meen ole lowd masheen get hur.
Ai will defianally hav tu tries that….mai goggie iz starten tu hav hip problems adn ai dunt want hurs gettin up moar then she has tu, but we has tu vacuum a lots
Dustballz also feer da vacoom!
Awl I haz tu do iz git da vacuum owt an kittehs scatter!
“NOOOOOOES IT B SUKKIN MAH PRESHUSS FURZ AWF!”
(Noat 2 self: git kitteh to beat up sooper-fugly sofa, lamp & wallpaypurz next.)
Dis kitteh b too beautimous 4 dis pictur..Shudda used a hareless 1.
omg, this so suks (roflmao @ herzzelvz)
OOh noes, der takin our lolz awae tomarree. Whi us?? Oh da Hugh Manatee, whi nawt da ovver guiz?
GRATE!!! Now awl I will haz tu dew iz kleen da howse!
Butt(!) wen it comes back?
dey due nawt sey!
hopes daze wil nawt borked it
mehbee givin da skwirrels a brake weel givs uz mor lolcats eberydey?
or newie improofed cawmint gajit tipe stuffs?
ohwhell – godda goe hoam naw. purrhaps ai wil goe tu teh skedadol zoo tu meat sum cheezpeeps inna purson tumorow (caturday
) iffin iz nawt tew cawld.
*williboi not like cold*
kthxbai
schmooes & hedbuts tew awl
hav safe trip hoam
Schmmoos to u and Ouch!
Dey nawt duz til laet nite . problee be ok fur maost ub us awn Sunnydai.
yup, ifinkso wuz 10pm Pafisik time, so late night for most evreewun, just for qwikk serber mayntenants, tehy sez.
Hey folks… from teh last lol…
by Jeditigger
Just wanted to note that, speaking of maturity, today I had to say goodbye to my 19-year-old, Nimue, who went to hang in Kitty Heaven with my first cat (and her love) Merlin and her best pal Gwen. I will miss my grey gir. Sleep tight, gorgeous.
would u like a hug?
{{{catslave}}} {{{Nimue n Merlin n Gwen}}}
{{{{catslave}}}}
(iz akshully by jeditigger; catslave just passing teh wurd along)
{{{{{{{jeditigger}}}}}}}
yoo wuz gud kitteh-slave to nimue, i’z shur her had wunnerful life wif yoo an yoo letted her go wen it wuz time. her iz happy and bownsy an playing agin wif her kitteh-frendz, an yoo kan viziting tehm in teh princess mu meddow.
woopsies
{{{{{{jeditigger}}}}}}
{{{{{{{{{{catslave}}}}}}}}}} I am sooo sorri tu hear ub your lose.
I grieve wif yu in my heart.
(psst, iz jeditigger, catslave iz just being teh messinjer
taked me a extry reeding)
{{{Jeditigger}}}
{{{{{{{{Jeditigger}}}}}}} My heart breaks for yu. I lost a kitteh obber a year ago an wen I fink of hyme my hearts is sad an happi at the same time. I remember awl uf the funni stuffs an then I cry because I miss hyme soo much. Nimue will awlwais bii in yur heart.
{{{{{Jeditigger}}}}}
{{{{{Jeditigger}}}}}
Skreeemeeng Suckkee Bawkz
amz Kittehz’ Nemmississ! Muss
dye sloaw, paynfull deff!!!!
Strypee Tukkz Kitteh
duz nawtz wawntz noyzee bawkzez
enneewayrz inz Howss
Strypee Tukkz Kitteh
pawndurrz haow 2 deestroyz deez
disgusteengz Mawnsturrz!
Jack.
skreeming sukkee bawks, lol! best deskripshun ob a vakyoom kleever evar!!
veri guud Jaack
*claps*
oh cheezfrenz, my shiro-kitteh wuz AWOL all day long an finaly showd up a fyoo minits ago. him iz teh orijinaul “dont fense me in” dood (wuld liek to keeping him in more, but tehr aren’t enuff trankwilizifyers in teh wurld), an haz a Sekrit Hedqwaters sumwher in teh nayborhood taht we haz nebber been ablol to find. iz not unusual for him to hanging owt tehr for howrs or eben all day. but him not camed arownd for brekkies dis morning liek him usualy duz, so i had a bad bad wurried. but him showd up on teh bakk porch finaly, all liek “oh, heer i iz, doo dee doo dee doo, wut yoo all wurried abowt?” i snorgled him and gibbed him choowy treets an teld him him iz a bad kitteh for gibbing me a bad wurry.
Yes, yes, yes. I haz wunna those kittehs. Hii lykes da drainage owtlets awn owr street. Boi desideded a few years ago dat da kittehs gather down there an has da poker game at nite, lyke da famous dog painting, an parti. Iz kinda funni tu sii kitteh heads pop up owt uf da opening an luk around lyk dey are security fur da nite.
Happi tu know yur Shiro iz home safe an sownd.
*lolz finking ob teh kitteh heds popping up owt ob teh storm drayns*
*iz definitely better tahn ebil klowns*
(reeded It long ago an iz skarred for lief)
Ohai lunarmommy! Mai meezer has taken to doing tath laytlee; wehn ai open teh door in teh moarning seh’s liek “Lemme owta heer!” Seh did nawt kum in last nite oar tihs moarning – missed her gushifuds, witch is unfinkablol! Ai saw her lolling awn teh sidewalk owtsied mai window arownd 6 pm. Her nawt say ware her binned; her just sai “Maaawm! Stop petting mii adn lemme go EET!”
Ai can has a hug plz? Ai hassa wurried abowt mai dotter. Her has a small mass on her ovary – most lieklee a benine fingee. *crosses ebreefing adn says a few prayers*
{{{{{{4point5}}}}}}}
Fanks sophie94, ai ‘preshee8s it! (Guess wot mai dotter’s nawt-sekkund naem is.)
hmmmm, iz it sophie?
Yup! Butt her goes by her sekkund naem.
wut that b?
Um, ai prefer to nawt sai, ‘k? Iz for conff… konf… for keeping fings pribet.
ooo sowwy, i unberstands
Plz tu forgibe me, i b noo and not sure bout boundaries
Noes, sophie94, nawt to be sawree! Iz nawt a big deel!
{{{{sophie94}}}}
{{{{{4point5}}}}} prayers.
Oh fanks, pj!
*Big huggz fur yu boff*
Mai alex wud get owt sumtimes but he wud imedatly hyde under teh bushez
Oh yu kan haz hugs an prayers an well wishes!! {{{{{{4point5}}}}}} Wishing yur dotter bestest uf health an luck. I am shure iz just wunna those wimmon things.
Fanks KLWU an 3KM. Wii has to wate for appoyntemint wif guyna… gynne… doctor for wimmins. Hopefullee nawt too long.
{{{4.5K}}}
{{{{4.5 an dotter}}}}
Fanks guise. Ai’s sed it befoar adn ai’ll sai it again – cheezpeeps bees teh bestest.
{{{{{cheezpeeps}}}}}
{{{{{4.5kittehs}}}}}
{{{{{4.5kittehs dotter}}}}}
i unnerstand thoze are not unyoozual, teh benine fingies. prays an fingers crossded.
Fanks sweetee. Adn a big schmoo! to yoo.
{{{{{4.5 an dotter}}}}}
*sendin helfee thots & heelin beems!*
iz ok wen teh kittehs are going in an owt akkording to tehms habit, iz wen tehy gets owt ob tehms usual rooteen an misses a meel or sumfin taht starts to getting wurrisum. hate it wen taht happens.
Anom! Skared uf clowns furebber. I readed it wen I wuz bout 23 an still had nite terrors. What a wicked brain Stephen haz, wuldn’t want tu live in hiz head!
Plasticat an ai LUBS “It”!! ai grees wif 3KM – Stephen sertinlee haz sum weerd stuffs goin awn in hiz hed! butt wii fink he is teh awesum! wii alwais wonder wut he haz nitemares uv…
Oh, Yes! I lubs tu read hyme books, just wuldn’t want tu lib insyde hymes head. I haz been a big fan sinse I wuz bout 13 or 14. Parents were worried fur a minute.
blooberds n flutterbyes
Owr Tira kitteh LUBS teh vakyoom! seriyuslee!! eben lets mii uze teh hose attachmint an vakyoom her!
Unique an Eva, howeber – az suun az dey heer teh klosit door open weer teh ebil vakyoom libs…dey leeve skid marks on teh floor az dey run an hyde!!
Dagnabit.
I’m gettin anuthur stoopy hedayk agin an DO NAWT WANT! I nawt has tiem foar dis. 2morro gonna be HYOOJ day an I nawt wanna has to endur it wif hedayk.
Gonna go to bed. Wish me lotsa luk.
‘Nyte.
Lots luk!!
‘Nyte
Nyte, Red!
ai hops yu feelz bedder tumawro
Nity nite red! SALE, SALE, SALE!! I wanna go tu Hawaii!!
@rhsb
Nayborhud kitties an my puppy an 2 clamsi me
send ur way teh dans uv suite dreems an a nite
uv R&R. Hop gud wishes an vibes fer u will halp.
It mite bee bettur iffen teh dust inhaelee fingee wud eets teh lamp and teh walpapur!
‘Nyte chezfens
Hav fun to thoos gowin tu zuu tomorrow!!
Macgyver reference win :p
That’s mean D:
Jest wunted to says hi to ebberywun……
I know ai am new, butt, i….
Sowwy….I hassa sad….my ex-w…..ex…..nawt-wife tuked teh kitteh todai, so I hassa kitteh no moar. I can still post teh comment thingies in cheezland, butt mai heart is bery hebby rite nao, so ai mai be incommu…incomm….nawt hier.
{{{{{Jeremy}}}}}
Mah hart iz hevvy fur u. Plz to come shaer ur feelings in Cheezland — we iz gud lisseners.
{{{{{jeremy}}}}} nightshayde iz right, we iz gud lisseners an tehr are many peeps heer hoo haz losted kittehs to going to teh bridj or to not being allowd to haz kittehs or teh ex taeks tehm… yoo will find unnerstanding an simpafetik peeps heer an many gud sholders for cryin on.
mebbee sumtime yoo kan haz noo kitteh?
(my bruvvers ebil ex, She Who Must Not Be Named, iz taking tehms son to Far Far Away. my bruvver still gets to seeing him sumtimes, but iz still very sad. sometmies iz just not fayr how theez fings happen, teh wun yoo lub gets taked away.)
{{{{{Jeremy}}}}}
Oh, Jeremy, I’m sorry.
{{{{{{Jeremy}}}}}}
Plz to nebbur bee thinking, “I’m new, BUT…”
One of the wondermuss things abowt cheezland is dat wee donut observe teh hierarchy and snottiness rules ub life and internetz. Ennybuddy wiff a kind hart is lubbed heer. (an we ebbun tries too lubbs trolls too, butt dat r hard…)
Gud nite (or wutebber time uv day it iz whereber u iz), Cheezpeeps. Ai lieklee will nawt be on until Wednesday — so until den, be happee, be helfee, and be gud to eech uvver!
I abhor teh decor. *runs*
We r all on da same page hear.
*snerk*
Iz nawt a gud dai tudai.
{{{{Jeditigger}}}} fur losing kitteh tu brigj;
{{{{Jeremy}}}} fur losing kitteh tu nawt-wife;
adn a hug fur mii fur stoopy bawdee korpirate roolz.
Adn a hug fur awl udder cheezpeepz wif a sad…
{{{{cheezpeeps}}}}
*sniffles*
At leest it’z weekendz…
{{{{{FluffyB}}}}} Heerz a tissue tu dri teh teeringz. Pleh! tu teh bawdee corporal an his stoopee rulz! Don worree dough, kittehs fynd yu wen yu leest expekt eet. Experiuns speekin!
*taiks tishew adn wipes iis* Fankyew AC. {{{{AfriCat}}}}
abhors? sometimes your cutesy (and slightly childish) spelling deviations just confuse …. if a caption requires dumbing down then its not funny.
yes, ‘abhors’; correct spelling, proper usage…
have some cake.
OMG. This is priceless. This is truly priceless.
Irony Troll Award of the Year.
and … do you losers think that YOUR lolcats? … a psychotherapist would have a field day in this comment section …
think that OUR lolcats are what?
who’re you mad at, lighten up…
have more cake!
snerk
ironic poster name is ironic
My aunt’s cat completely loves vacuum cleaners. As soon as she hears one, she won’t stop bothering you until you have “cleaned” her. Yeah, she is crazy.
Uzed To Haz a Kitty which Liked teh Vacuums.
Followed uss around begginz for the sucshuns from it when ever we turned it on.
Whut a nise dreem: a kitteh dat lieks teh screemin sukky bocks. Yu cud jintly vakyoom all teh loose hairz rite off…
Not mah boys. Not in dis life!
<screemin sukky bocks
you liar! dogs are the scared retarded and cats are only scared cause of the noise we don’t have a noisey one so my cat attacks it!
so first get your facts stright
this seems like part two of the earlier post.
After a few drinks, that is.
wow………?
too easy.
(runnin’ low on cake) “didn’t know there would be such a rush”
mah kitteh lurvs (srsly) bing vakyum cleened.
At furst he be skard but nao he lurvs it cuz it remoovz hairz
macksimum suckage…DO NOT WANT