Hard work pays off
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
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Cheezburger Network Blog
Troo dat!
Conskratch Anni, tawp ov teh foar-wai brayde
Dis cawls fur sillibrashuns! Hav sum sparkilly wyne adn coktayle noms.
Nom shlurp thx!
TL:DR
Too long: Didn’t read. I was too lazy, u see.
tabby’s lazy: doesn’t run =( – . ‘ )=
Wye run wen u can wawk? Wye wawk wen u can stan still? Wye stan wen u can sit? Wye sit wen u can lye doun?
Why lie down when we can Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Eggzacklee! (Ai wuz 2 layzee 2 sai dat maiselb!
ZZZzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZzzzzz
Hhmmm? Whut? Um, oh, I was just resting my eyes. They was teh extry tired because Aahz was playin’ wif ‘em on teh last lol.
Mai gran yoost 2 sai dat. She snoared wen she restid her eyes tho!
mine too
I iz jess chekin mai eyelidz 4 pinhoalz…
.
Doan wannem 2 leek, U noez…
That wut my dad used tew say aahz
mai Daddeh wud sai “Ai is juss composin maisef” and wud tuk his hands in hims swedder an has a lidl snooze – sumtyms wiv a puppeh or a granson.
AHHHWWW. cute & sweet
paysw off in snorgles?
I has a big Do Want wen lukkin at dis kitteh. Sigh. Sadly i goes off to wurk.
Oh noes! Tehy stolded mai motto!
Kitteh duz it teh owld fashun wai, hii lets sumwun elze urn it fer himz
Y do todai wot ubbers wil do fur yoo tomoro?
Awl wurk ann noe plai
maykez kitteh a dull boi!
they say hard work never killed anyone, but kitteh is not taking any chances…
ew no teh ole “awl werk anna no play, butt kitteh laziness iz FUReber”
Awl werkz n noe plaiz maykz Jak uh dull boicat,
Butt (!) noe werkz n awl layzee maykz kitteh uh floofee snorgle.
Himz floof needs mah snorgling, aifinkso.
yesh! he am beutiful!
Sittin ats teh doc uv teh bay (window)….ooo dots
kitteh wizdom
I haz a kwestion — mii brudder gotted two babbeh kittehs an wun ub dem (dey bee sisturz) awlwais triez ta run out da haus. she waitifies bai da door an wen it bee opened she runsawaoutsidewifaberryfastkwiknessansneekiness dey bee wurried she weel sneek sneek owt an getteds lostie. Dey awlreedy founded her owt der awl alonez wunce…
some kittehs are natural escapers, some aren’t.
all i can suggest is (if this is possible) making sure that kitteh is shut inside a room before opening an outside door…
I sugjests a vinegar-an-wattur skwirt bottul to be yoosed anytime she is seen by teh dore.
Also tehy shud get her yused to a collar wif a ID tag on it, or if tehyr reely seriyusly wurried, get her chipped.
But mosely tehy needs to teach her that hangin by teh door is a no-no-bad-cat.
duz she lyke to chayse birds? or is she looking for fud? We used to have Canolli on a diet, and once he got out and went to all the playces were peeps used to leave fud for him…
Lucky used tew hang around teh door waitin tew escape. Den wun day he suceeded.I dint kno hims wus gone till he didnt sho up fur gushie breakfast. Fur seben days, i looked and looked fur hims. den he showed up on the seventhday on the bak porch. We was so happy tew b together again! he was sooooo skinny. He never tried to leave agin after dat. he stays well away frum teh door now, i can assure u!
the water bottle idea is a good wun! I hope it werks!
She jest a bitty babbeh (4 o 5 munfs) sew Ifinkso she jest wans ta see wear eberybudy is goin…
Hao lawng haz he had her? Hour kittehs were alwaiz wantin to eggskape at nawt sekund, tehn after won or too wekes settled down adn ebben tho tehy still liiked to be owtsyde tehy alwaiz came bak (speshully at nomtyme)
hmmm, about 5 o 5 week week weeks … butt dey wented onna bacashun and mii mama watchified dem and da kittehs go inna da RV wen day go campin — sew she nose ders fun stuffs outta da door …
Iz nachural fur teh kittehs to wanna go owtsyde in teh beeg bad wirld, juss hab to be hoapin she remememebers wear she libs adn cums bak hoam. Sumtymes in teh winta tehy hang arownd teh howse moar adn nawt be wanting to go owt in teh kold adn sno!
anybuddy use da shocky mats furr kittehs? I hab used dem furr goggies, butt nawt kittehs —
Kitteh! Poot yur pors wehr Ai can see tehm! Yu will go blynd – an remember; Ceiling Cat is Watching you!
Poot ur paws?
poot = putt
tomaytoe = tomartoe
egg plant = aubergine
Courgette = zuchini!
Sydwok = payvmunt
Teh parting on teh left = Teh parting on teh right
same old = same old
Alsatian = german shepherd
boot=trunk…
hud = bonnet
GMTA, Ambercat!
coif = bonnet
bonnet = hood of car
Bumper = fender
Boot = trunk
pocketbook=purse
Teh new boss = Teh old boss
Kitteh wolking awai = wun-eyd kitteh, wolking bakwerds
*has a sad for teh pore one-eye-missing, backwards-walking kitteh*
I didn’t taykit! I sware!
*casts a critical eye upon Aahz*
*Aahz catches the critical eye cast at him*
O, luk — heerz un eggstree eye 4 da pore wun-eyed kitteh
Score 1 for teh Universe.
…adn teh crowd goez wyld!
*holds on tight as teh Universe takes a victory lap*
*jumps on with LCB as tehre seems to be lots of room in teh Universe*
Da Universe iz muchlee biggerer n fasterer dan da Splortmobile, I finksew
I finkso maybe TOO fasty.
*gets a littlol dizzy*
From teh write-up in “Let’s Go: Yerp” for York, TTI: “A place where a street is called a ‘gate’, a gate is called a ‘bar’, and a ‘bar’ is called a ‘pub’.”
Well uv corse, wat els? We noe wat we meen!
Whale den, sai watchu meen n meen watchu sai
ai hadda teechur hoo wuz Dutch (nawt Deutsch) adn he always sed: “don’t lissen to what ai say, lissen to what I mean”
nawt surprizinlee, ai did nawt doo well on hiz tests.
Sownz liek uh Gallagher rooteen:
“U park onna dryvwai n dryv onna parkwai. Cargoe goez bai ship, uh shipmint goez bai truk. Y doo dey kawl ‘em ‘apartmintz’ win deyz awl stuk 2gevvur? Y doo dey kawl ‘em ‘bildinz’ win deyz awlriddee bilt? Mebbe dey shood kawl ‘em ‘biltz’ — oar mebbe ‘krumblinz’.”
Y gifs munnee tu Inland Revenue when yu liffs on teh coast?
Ambercat sumtiemz tawks wiv a norf TTI aksent dey sai poot wen dey meen put!
pffft!
Iz troo tho!
In IL we call bubbly stuff pop. Mefinx dey call it soda ebbryware else.
It’z pop in TTI!
Fizzee pop!
Fizzee liftin dreenk?
Is teh pop in teh northern parts of Ohio, whare I growed up. Is teh soda where I libs now, in teh semi-South. (That’s semi as in sorta, not as in there’s lotsa big trucks. Although there is.)
Was teh funneh when I was in teh college in Ohio and a froshman from teh soda-saying part of Pennsyltucky axed where she could get a snack. Someone sed “There’s a pop machine in teh student lounge.” Her eyes popped, er, sodaed, outta her hed. “There’s a WHUT?” “Pop. U knoes, Coke, Pespi, that sorta thing.” “Oh. I thought u sed ‘pot’.”
Dey prolly can haz doze kinda musheenz n Calico-fornya purdee sune, da wai fingz r gowin…
“Pot” haz lotza diffrent names but Im 2 much of a slacker to start listin…Zzzzzz….dots!
Mai muvver had a penfrend in `Merica. Mum wuz sumwat puzzlold wen Mary-Lou axt her iffn she liekt 2 go bummin rownd teh shops. Her din’t noe dat bum ment ennifing eggsept bakksied!
I had a frend from Germanee who was asking for a rubber (eraser) one nite…
An den dere wuz teh TTIer hoo offerd to Knock hims fren up in teh mornin!
It cums frum teh mill touns wen a “Knocker-up” wuz a man hoo went rownd teh streats 2 nokk awn teh windoez 2 wayk up teh mill werkerz in teh daiz b4 ebbriwun hadd alarm clokks!
“Bally Jerry pranged his kite right in the how’s your father. Hairy blighter, dicky-birdied, feathered back on his Sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harper’s and caught his can in the Bertie.”
I have no i d a wat u juss sed, butt(!) it’s da funniest fin ib hered in a lon time. LMAO
Is from a Monty Python thingy. It’s RAF pilots talking in their speshul “banter”, but teh joke is they cannot unnerstand whut this one guy is saying.
Aifink sum uv it iz haow RAF tieps yoost 2 tawk, but teh rest iz maed up.
Sorry, don’t understand your banter, Squiffy….
Sawt drink
weez be callin it Softdrink an ai bee hazin no idea wai
Jest wut u bee finkin dis sweet innoscent kitteh bee doin AC?
I is not bein lazee – I is watchin teh ballgame very carefully. Iz reportur.
Anudder battur gitz up, n itza lawng flye bawl 2 Bekuz! Y? I dunno! Heez awn thurd, n I doan givva darn!
LOL — remindz mii ub da tyme mii dotter axed what wuz happinin on Woo Wanz Ta Bee a Millyonaire .. I sed, “dey pikked a case, eberybudy screemed, dey opened da case and dey screemed agin … ” i no no wut else she foughted wood hab happined…. butt shee wuz naught happity wif mii furr sum reezun…
Ooo an den abdter da cammershals did ebrebuddy screem again?
yes!! Didjoo see da same episode dat eye did???
I Don’t Give a darn? Oh, he’s our shortstop….
Yay 4 KJ! Finullee, SUMwun gitted da ref…
Handsumm Strypee Tukkz
Kitteh knoez datz awll t3h gurlz
lubz a shawrpp dresst man!
Handsumm Strypee Tukkz
Kitteh coodz chayss t3h gurlz, butz diz
amz mutch eezee~urr
Handsumm Strypee Tukkz
Kitteh waytz for glimpz ub t3h
goarjuss Callee~co!
Jack.
Yu gots dat rite as yooshual, Jack: teh ladees liek a littul window dressin!!!
*clapity* I liek dis wun Jack. hims a sharp dresst man!
I lubs his tayl, so luxurious and bushee
heerz teh burfday fairy to say HAPPEE BURFDAY to Kimk an evreewun else hoo haz a burfday today! if it iz yor burfday, dont be shy, speek up an tell us!!
i haz bringed tasty fudjy burfday cakes, red velvit caeks, iskreem, frooty party punch, noyzemakers, an goodie bags filled wif bownsy balls taht lite up wen tehy bownse, sekrit ajint walkee-talkees taht reelee wurk!, kandee, an colur-it-yorself alien zombie stikkers wif bokses ob elebenty-seven crayns in alien zombie colurs wif bilded-in sharperner!! an a big swish ob teh burfday wand to make all yor burfday wishes come troo!!
———-***¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭****
Nuffin 2 be ashaymed uv, bein bold!
yesh, that way u stands out!
Happy birfdai to eberyone!
mmmmm, cake and icee kreem!
FangQ burfday fairy!
*draws flowers awn outside of sudan chare wiff crayons*
Fanks burfday fairy!!!
Happy burfday evrywun!
Happee burfday burfday peeps
Fanks, Burfday Fairy – I’ll have sum fudjy cake and sum red velvit cake, and a walkee-talkee.
Happitayl birddae tu Kimk and awl teh birfdae peeps! Fanks BF fur teh noyseemaikurs. Ai hafts tu maiks mai noys awn ICHC tudae becuz IRL is wirking in teh libraree!
HaPpY BiRfDaYs!!!
*piks owt an yewo bouncy ball*
tanks Burfday Fairy!
*gibbes teh ball a weal gud trow an den be tyin tu katch it but nots succeedin sew habin tu chaze eberywhere*
Fanks burfday fairy! **pushes button awn seekrit ajint walkee-tawkee** SKWEEEEEEEL Tin foor gud buddie yu reed me? SKWEEEEEEL
*SKWAAAKcracklecrackle*want fries wif that?*SKWAAAKcracklecrackle*
*SKWXXKSXKXXSSSKKZX*
Uh dubble cheezburger, unyun reengz, n uh larj orinj dreenk.
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Didja git awl dat?
*SKWEELcracklecrackle*Elebenty moneys. Pull around to teh second window, plz.*SKWEELcracklecrackle*
***SKWEEEEEELLL**** Aid pay yu butt den Ai’d hab tu mayke yu mostly ded. ***SKWEEEEEEL***
ohai I has lol on deh upcoming pages, is on deh second page
bout Schroedinger’s kitteh an string theoree
YAY furr yu two-kittehs!
fanks parrot head
Bravisseemo! Sune we bee seein it on teh hoampaje aifinkso!
Its been awhile since one of my lols made it to deh frunt payge
so that would be nice
fanks minminsmum
Yay! *clappity clappity*
fanks lcb!
This is totally me today. Blergh.
U has a berry lubly tale.
Mii two!! Sittin around … get upz doo wun fink, den sits down agin, rest, do win mor fing … rest repeat!!
Oh yea — doughnut furgit about da eetin .. dat fitz in jest about eenywear inna da list …
As long as I can do it while sitting/laying down.
Nawt lazy, in deep thot! Yeah, that bii it. I think best wif my eyes klosed.
is meditating, plz not to disturb
Purrxactly! Ooomm, ooomm, omzzz,zzzz, zzzzz.
Well, folkz, I gess it b time tu taking mai satlolite dish down…… Must go 4th and battlol deh wind agin.
haha dis ez mah new motto!
Luv teh spellings! U publish dikshuneri? Mai kittehs read pretty gud.
Just found out my lol wasn’t original… Sorry!