Mom? Can my friends come in to play?
ebberywun can cum in nd play cept 4 dat wun.
Picture by: LORRAINE. Caption by: drunkitty2000 via Our LOL Builder
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Mom always says “Don’t play hairball in teh house”
lotsa pohtenshul foar hayrbawls heer!
Kittehs aer kwantum potenshul tew reality conberters.
Who teh whut, now?
*uses LCB’s momuntary confuzion tu steel awl teh shyny fings from her bakpak*
OO.oo Ai lub eet when a plan cumz togevver.
Da burgaler gits burgalled.
*is glad she took teh rong backpack this morning and jd only has GP’s soiled laundries*
*discobers he haz ownly laundry… oar iz it… LCB’s credit card fawls out ob one ob teh pockits!*
GP’s soiled laundries iz shyny?
*haz a pondur*
*wanders off, skritchin hed*
*izzint shur hooz hed sheez skritchin*
Yeah fore LCB an Anni, followed kwicklee buy BF an Amber a mimmut behind. Ai offerz kawffee (iceed an hot) in mannee flaborz an a pladder of meetz, cheezes, an begtablolz wif sorded breadz fore tu maek sammiches.
fank u {{{BOM}}} ai luv sorded bread!
Ai R glad, cauz peeps laff at mii when ai brings da sordid pasteez. Doen noe whii, ebrione seems tu eetz dem here.
pasteez?
LOL!! NAWT PAYSTEEZ!!!
Paaaastees. Laik yoo get in teh Cornwall in teh TTI oar in teh YOO PEA ov Meechigan – oar Mini soda???
uh huh. shur. shur tehy iz….
aifinkso cheezpeeps lyke sordid noms uv awl types, teh moar sordid teh bettur in mai pinyun!
*dives hedfirst into iced coffee*
*fishes lcb aut ov teh eyesed cawffee*
*driez hur awf wif teh hunnert dollar towel*
Heer!! Aii think yoo ar oberraught!! Hav a nice paaaastee an DRINK yur iced cawfee!
*pouts*
I wanted to go swimming!
*deh cween b floatingz bai in a bublol
*pikkz LCB up and pullingifyz hur intu deh bublol
*Dey float eesterlee and finally b ober deh Chessie Peak Bay
*dropz LCB intu deh bay.
Enjoy ur swim!!
*Wayvez gailee!1!!
ROFL!! eerrrrm . . .
Cweenmj – WAHT hav yoo dun!!!!
*jumps into teh wadder – swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim*
*Taeks LCB in teh laif saving hold – swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim swim bak to teh shore*
Nao – will yoo JUST sit heer an eet yur paaaastee an drink yur iced cawfee!!!
Yoo can go swmming . . . in a minnit . . . an yoo cant go out ene deeper tahn yoo can tuch teh bottom!!1 OK??
Hmph. Fine.
*sips iced coffee*
Yow! This iced coffee is too hot!
conga-rats to ebbryone. Yummy stuff, Bom … fankies!
**nom nom sip sip nom nom gobblegobblegobble **
Thx Bom, iised cawfee wud be wundermuss. Lundun iz hawt an stikkee 2dai.
Lunnon has melted! Oh noes – we needs a gnu capitul fur TTI; Ai voet fur Blakpule – it’s faymus fur freshayranfun!
An it haz tramz!
An loominayshuns!
Ai finks der mush bee a bendee fing inna space/tyme caus iz onlee 75F heer in Eye-ohh-wae-ah an eet shud bee inna hi 80 to 90′s. Iz berri weerd, since ai isnt usin eet, ai senz da air condishner to TTI fore U to use.
Thx, but bai teh tiem it gets heer it wull prolly be bakk 2 nermul 70s insted uv mid 80s! We seldum haz lawng hot spellz. Teh wever man sed we’ll haz thunnerstoarmz bai friedegg!
…Adn Mistur adn Missus Ramsbottom
wint thair wif yung Albert, theyre son.
A grand littul lad were yung Albert,
Awl drest in ‘is best, kwite a swell!
Adn he’d a stikk wiffa horsez-hedd handel,
Teh finest taht Woolwurfs could sell!…
*dingdingding*
Yu win teh pryz fur rekkernysin teh refrense – Ai knu sumwun wud!
Tehy diddunt fink much ob teh oh shun
Teh wayves tehy wus fiddlin an smawl;
Tehre were no reks an nobuddy drounin,
Fact nuffink to laff at, at awl!
Otay, ai admitz ignorance, wat iz da poem?
It’s “Albert an Teh Lyon”, maed faymus bai Stanlee HoLOLoway. Fynd it awn yutoob an enjoi!
(The Lion and Albert..by Marriott Edgar, who has our apologeez, adn a famous-ish monologue from Stanley Holloway)
Fank-U. Mi public school edumacashun let mi shoe U.
..So seekink foar furver amuzement,
Tehy payed adn went intu teh zooo;
Wher tehy’d lyons adn tygers adn kamelz,
Adn old ale adn samwidges tuu!
Tehre were wun grate big lyon kalled Wallace
Hiz noze were awl covered wif scarz;
Hii lay in a som-no-lent poschure
With teh side of hiz fais tu teh barz…
Nao Albert had red a bowt lyuns
An hao tehy er froeshus an wyld
An to see Wallace lyin so peas full
Weeelll, it dint seem rite to teh chyld!
So strate wai, teh bravy lidl feller
Nawt shoin a more sul ob feer!
Tuk his stik wiv teh horseshed handul
An gavy wallace a poek in teh eer!
Yu cud see tah teh lyon dint lyke it,
For givin a kindova rollll,
He pulled Albert in teh cage wiffim,
Add swallowed teh litlol lad whole!!!1!
Tehn Pa, hoo had seen teh okkurents,
Adn didn’t kno wot tu do neckst,
Sayd, “Muvver! Yon lyon’z et Albert!”
Adn Muvver sayd, “Well! Ai am vext!”
So Mr and Mrs Ramsbottom
Kwite rightly, when awlz said and dun,
Komplained tu teh Animlol Keeper
Taht teh lyon can has eeted teyhre son…
Teh Keepeh wus kwyt nyse abowt it,
He sed “Wot a nastee mishap!
R yu shor taht it’s yur son he’s eeten”
“R weshor?!” sed Pa “heer’s his cap”
Teh manidger had to be sent fur.
He caym an he sed “Wot’s to do?”
Pa sed “Yon lyuns et Albert!
An him in his Sundee cloves too!”
Tehn Muvver sed “Ryt’s ryt, yung feller.
Ai fink it’s a shaym anna sin
Fur a lyun to go an eet Albert,
An afteh we payd to com in!”
Teh manager wanted no trubble;
He tuuk owt hiz purse rite awai,
Adn sayd, “Haow mutsch tu settel teh matter?”
Pa sayd, “What du yu usualee pay?”
But Muvver had turned a bit arkward
Wehn she thought whair her Albert had gawn,
She sayd, “Someboddi’s got to bii summonssesesed!”
So taht waz decided upawn.
So rawnd tehy went to teh Pleece Stashum,
In front uvva Majistrait chap;
Tehy toldim wot happend tu Albert
Adn proved it– by showin hiz cap.
Teh madge is strate gabe his oh pin yun;
Taht nowun wus rilly to blaem
An he hoepd teh Ramsbottom
Wud hav menne mor suns to teihr naem.
At tihs Ma gawt proper blayzin!
An “FankQ, Sir, Kyndlee,” sed she
“But wayst al owr lyvs, raysin chilluns,
To feed ruddy lyuns? Nawt Me!”
(Teh End! Yay Ambercat! Fanks for stirring up teh remembery of this silleh story, wif which we have pretty much Shanghaied this thread adn prolly annoyed all teh Cheezfriends to distracshun! Clappity clappity!!!
now iknows ware Pam Ayres gotted inspyred ‘she found teh stik teh yaboz had adn poked him orf his pearch’
*snerk*
Butt(!) it’s nawt teh end – we still has teh hoel ob “Teh Retern ob Albert” to do! Mebbee we shud sayv taht fur teh nekst LOL….!
At a fambly weddin, yeers ago, we had a “Grooms (my) fambly versus Awl teh Odder Gest” sing-off an mai WHOEL fambly, as wun, resyted Albert an teh Lyun!
Oh noes, Ambercat an Lundoc!! It wuz enchanting!!!
ICHC iz a skule awl bai itseelf!! Ai hav lerned SOOOO much heer!!
Yea! Woot-woot! taht wuz deeliteful!
Tru schoolarz neber stopz learning!
{{{LD & Ambercat}}}
Dey wull be gud, Ai pwomiss…
Pleeeez mahm? wii wont maik a mess, ai prawmis
oenlee if yu has dun yur hoemwerk an tyded yur rume…!
Thanks for coming by to help me dispose of the dog, guys……Oh, um…. hi mom, you were supposed to be at work by now…..
pleeez pleeez pleeeeeeeeeeezzzz??????
Sorry guis, I can’t kome owt n play, Ise stil growndeded. I brang her a ded bird but it wuz no gud, she’s stil mad abowt wut I did in her shue.
sum peeps jus doan appresheeate ‘modern art’ wen itz in tehyre shoo
mebbe U shud try a ded lizard to match her shoos.
Wudn’t dat be too ded lizards, then?
mebbe one reellee reelllee big ded lizard?
Free ded lizzerrdez.
Oh noes! The bullies frum skool followed me home!
Dat oranj one defurnitely luks ebil.
mawfeeyuh kittehs luukin foar teh protekshun munnees, nawt luukin sew happee
Maahm! Teh floof parayd eez heer!
Itza mainely coon collekshun ifinkso!
Brillyunt! Ai luuurves Mainely Coones…Ai has always WANT!ed a mainely coon or too, dey seems sooo beeyootifully floofy and affecshunate Butt ai lovez mai four tooxeedoo kittehs too deff all de saim!
Ai had a mainly coon, but she crossed de bridj
ai wud liek another wun!
Aww, sowwy she crossed deh bridj!
Purrheps ud lieke deh little lady on deh inside indis picher?
Ai kno ub someone in IFfaca, NY hu raized koony-kittehs, mebbe stihl duz.
Aww, so sowwy.
Do you haz anuzzer kitteh to snuggle up wif? I hoap so! Doan be sad. Awl kittehs go too floofy heaven.
Dees kihds luk tu ole fur u…u need frenz closer tu ur own age
Lastieme u plaied wid deez kihds, u enned up crying.
Awwwwwww dass kyoot!
Teh wun axin teh kwestion izza beeyuutimous grrll-kitteh. Aiz in lub.
Ai haz da wunderin, Africat iz U da beegg kitteh wif a main or a liddlol kitteh wif da pinkee toe padz???
Yu cud see tah teh lyon dint lyke it,
For givin a kindova rollll,
He pulled Albert in teh cage wiffim,
Add swallowed teh litlol lad whole!!!1!
Tehn Pa, hoo had seen teh okkurents,
Adn didn’t kno wot tu do neckst,
Sayd, “Muvver! Yon lyon’z et Albert!”
Adn Muvver sayd, “Well! Ai am vext!”
So Mr and Mrs Ramsbottom
Kwite rightly, when awlz said and dun,
Komplained tu teh Animlol Keeper
Taht teh lyon can has eeted teyhre son…
Oops. This belongs upthread. Trying again.
Moob alawng plees. Nuffink to see heer!
Piques throo teh crowd, traiing to see the Nuffink!
Yu muss kleer yr mynd …
Whale kittehs an ovver creatshures, iz tyme fore mii to leabs fore tu gets mi hares cutted. Yeah Locks for Love – every two years!
awww, taht is a awsum cauz!
BTW, u haz a noo emayo
yay for Bom! I nebber had the pa-shunce to grow mine hare out for locks of love … I tried a cuple times, but gave up at about 18 months … growing your hare for locks ob lub is a very wonderful thing to do.
Yu’r mae hero, Bom!
can we hav dinnah and sleepzovah to?
I can has blooness nao?
yesh! yesh u cahn haz!! yay!
ai cahn haz mai Fourth of July avatar nao?
awww, ai cahn haz but iz tew liddle tew see mai hollydai noizy maiker an mai bloons an mai cheezburg an mai festibe cuppycaik
U can be mai fren nao?
{{{luvscatsva}}} Hao’s yu been?
ai iz good, thnx! hao u iz??
Ai’z good, tew, fankyoo! Juss bak in frum wadering teh vejjie pach. Whew!
Dey kin only come ober & play if dey brings der own lintbrushes.
Floofee Kittehz cumz
oavurr 2 playz cuz dayz knoez
dat itz ‘Lawndree Day!”
‘Lawndree Day’ andz Floof
goez 2geddurr lyke Wawrm Sun
andz wide Windo Sillz
Floofee Kitteh willz
beehayv. Wawntz 2 chekkz owt t3h
brandz noo Beeg Lawng Chayr!
Jack.