…but Bob, only a HORRIBLE sadist would pretty up a torture chamber with such a festive curtain!
i cant trust dose hoominz anymoar.
picture: DH. lol caption: Winnie-Wonka
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…but Bob, only a HORRIBLE sadist would
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Wat wud a nies sadist do?
LOL – GMTA, Annipuss!
wadder bording? is naught torchair, Ore sew ai here…
Dem sed nuffing abawt bafs nawt being tortur!!
yes and I has memo frum lolyers dat saiz it
Wut did she noze nd wen did she noze it? Ai cant beleef she dint unnurstand
Did yuze heer abowt teh massikist who lyked nuffing better than an ice-cold shower in teh morning, sew had a hot baff instead?
*paw fase*
did juw here about teh agnostik dyslexik insomniac? Hii stayed up awl nite wunnering if tehre rlly wuz a dog.
*hed desk* *snerk*
ADHwD = attensun defeecit hey whuts dat???
woodjew reepeet teh kwesshun, ai naught payed ‘teenshun…
Wuldn’t teh ultimate torture foar a masochist bii nawt tew do it?
Teh massokist sez “hurt me!” Teh saydist sez … nooo
**resists urge tew make joke about flogging a dead horse**
*resists urge 2 make joke about hoarse flies*
**Haz a wunder**
**Goez awf tew googlol hoarsey flies**
teh horsefliesbutt teh fleas flee!!!
butter flies, 2, aifinkso. budd knot margarine.
doughnut reezist! I wnna heer da harsey fly joke!!!
Hao wud a gud sadist decorate?
GMTA NS!
wiff snipps an snaylez an pupper dawg tales?
Snips ub what I wunderz? *shudderz finkin about itz….*
I thot it wuz frog an snails an puppeh dog tayls
iz eever, or boff, aifinkso.
Snipz uf teh ten drillz uf doom aifinkso.
Gib yore kitteh a pownd ob cat grass, bowls ob various kitteh-safe food dyes, adn sum reely strong cheez. Yore kitteh will den demonstrayt how gud sadists dekkorate.
Watch owt kittehs!
Why? Iz watch nawt waddur proof?
Wut kitteh doin wearin watch N-E-way?
Makin shure dey git their nomz an napz awn tyme.
I C…I C…tell meh moar ’bout this concept yew cawl “tyme”.
It restricks wen yew can sleep and hab gushifuds, huh?
Sounds liek an ebil cawspiracee tew keep kittehs…zzzzzzzz
Kitteh tyme=wen I want it!
Wut dew wii want? GUSHIFUDS!!!
Wen dew wii want it? NAO!!!
Wut dew wii want? NAPZ!!!
Wen dew wii want dem?…zzzzzzz
Thyme!!! pleh! dont want!
Catnips noms! want!!!
Dats a Sage prefurrans foar uh kitteh.
Oops – Mai bold awf button mus bii borked.
yore parsley rite!
Plz! Iz saffron frum teh puns!
ohai booklion!
Did U hadz deh cheezmeet with gremlin?
Ohai two_kittehs, yes! We hadded a wonderful Cheezmeet. Gremlin is grayte purrson, Mr. Gremlin is terrifik, and Dexter-kitteh is totally cool, too. I liked them all bery much. We had champagne and cheese and crackers and talked.
Gremlin says ohai to evverybudy! They are havving gud honeymoon.
How neet, for teh cheezmeet, booklion! wear dew yew libb? ai had won cheezmeet sew far, butt it wuz wiff teh big cheezes: JCHK and hurr magisty teh Kween MJ! funny thing: last nite ai googloled “kitkay” jsut 4 fun, an (after a bunch ob asian gurls named “kitkay” there wuz a foto ob mii wiff the Jan and teh MJ togevver!
Wow! I would like to meet Janet and Cween MJ. I’m in teh Finger Lakes rejun ov New York. Iz farm and wine country here. I haz also hadz bery nyce Cheezmeets wif two_kittehs, Uniquekitty and Plasticat, and teh Skwirrlgrrl. Cheezpeeps be teh win.
kool! ai is going “bakk eest” in a cupplol weaks–will B in CT and MA. ai wunnder if NE cheezfrens libbs in Noo England ai wood lubbs and lurves to meet NE Cheezers!
Mayke en anouncement tomorrow when moar cheezpeeps are online. Whut part ov MA will you be in?
Ai mint dat catnips iz gud for takeeng kitteh’s caraway
Oh drat.
Drat!
Drat!
DRAT!elbenty!
I gib up.
*points and laffs*
You mustard dun sumfing wrong, cauze dat bold is cumin on a bit too strong.
whuts teh beeg dill? lettuce knot git curry’d away.
Aw, dat’s anise fing to say, kitkay.
fangs, booklion, wii cheezfrens shood laff R caresaway!
its trooly amaceing, wii cheezpeeps knoe allspices!
Wut wuz de oregeno qwestun?
Holy Gaucamole (adds cumin) booklion, ai fink yew awr rite!
**Tries again**
**Gingerly presses teh keys**
**instead ob sumaceeng dem**
Its a=mace-ing whut yu can do when yu triez.
GMTA, kitkay, your post hadn’t come up yet while I was writing mine!
Oregano-l, veri oregano-l!
Ize getting tired now…I feels my basil metabolism slowing down.
Iz noe cormspiracee, kittehs noe da tyme. Iz tyme fore moer gushifuds, tyme foer Dad tu cum hom sew ai kin playe inna garagee. Alwaez tyme fore nap.
Cuz we nawt can haz watch dawg?
Is teh dreddin wadder-torchur chaymber!
… drip … drip … innundayt!
Az long az they don’t git owt da board.
Don wurree. No-wunz gonna be board wuns teh waddur startz.
da warsh bord and da soapz –da bord iz ta scrubadubdub da kitteh awn ta bee sur ta git awl da poisin offa demz
Awl Abord!
mii jazzy puppeh googies likes da baftub. iffin I turnz awn da wader a leetol but he stanz der and drinkies an drinkies and drinkies till hemm tumbly get beeg!! Dem heem hafta runz outside and peepeepeepeepeepeepeepeepee!!!
I nawt turnz awn da fauceet eeny morz
Orange kitteh is snorglishus-and poysen.
nyse bafff warsh away poysen?
Maybi iz lyke pufferfish, but insted ob growing larger, teh kitteh turns orinj. Bofe aer poysin adn bofe hab tu du wib water. Stands tu raison.
reesons puff up winn dey gits wet, 2.
Can I borrow this tortchur chambur, plz?
Ya see, I gots this list….
… ob fingz u needz warshd?
Nope.
… ob kittehz dat needz teh torchurin? (plz say nope!)
Nope. Try agin.
Shirly u doan’t wanna torchoor peepl?!
Why nawt?
Teh list of hyoomins dat haz gotted awn my nerbs haz been growin by leeps an bowndz.
Dey must pay.
An don’t call me Shirley…
MMMMMMmmmmmehbee.
GMTA, Shirley.
Wii shirly dew.
Oh pleez!!!
Yew jes made teh list bucko!
EEP!
Nawt to wurree, NC.
U nawt awn teh list……yet.
U iz my sowndin bored.
the bucket list?
Yah, peeplol whose heds I wanna put a mettlol bukket awn an den get a beeg hammur to wack teh bukkit wif
~~~BAAAANNNNNGGGGGG!!!!!!~~~
I don’t finkso, herz ar not Dick Cheney
How can u be sew shur?
**has a ponder**
Red haz sum seerious angwee goin awn … mae bee sheez nawt Dickee Cheney, butt purrhaps shee steel wantz tz ooze heem methidz awn da special peeps inna herz reel life
Wut a lubly way to frase it, E_M!
Donut has a wurree – I nawt torchur jes ennywun, onlee teh trulee deserbin wuns be gettin “teh treetmint”.
I hopez you iz nawt off-ended … ebberywun haz da angwies frum tyme to tyme …
Oh hai, Red. Whassup, dude(tte)?
Ohai Maus.
I finkso I’m gonna has to start wearin my “speshul” boots awn a dailee baysis.
I’ll tell Brother. I don’t think he’ll mind.
Red, I has hadda Very Pleh Weakend! Mrs. Maus is PO’ed at me.
Mien bited teh big (fat, hairee, dizeezed) wun, too.
Got in2 an argyoomint of sorts wif mahm an hur nawt speek 2 me dis moarnin. Donut kno if hur speekin 2 me tonite, I nawt go to find owt yet.
I. have. GOT. to move. SOON!
Why Mrs Maus ticked?
Yu REALLY kan’t go home agin, I tried, I failed, I lived tu tell teh stori, an so did mine muther.
Short (maybe notso) version: We went to VA to move Maus Daughter out of her college housing. Basically, me and Daughter work stuff out for maximum efficiency. But because of this, Wife always feels like The Fifth Weel. But this time she REALLY got ticked off, over (IMO) small stuff.
.
Ah well. We mens afe always F’ing-up. Another one on my docket…
I’m prolly nawt wun to gibs teh adbise, but wun werd be berry importint:
COMMUNICATION
**starts big long rant, but chanjes mind**
Gurl, we been Communicating all weekend *sigh*. I think she has a Last Straw thing going on.
.
We’re not changing anything. But (hehe) “communicating” is one of the hardest things I’ve had to do these past 28 years.
Wayle, at leest u been commyoonikaytin an nawt ignorin stuffs u nawt wanna talk abowt…..
Deer CC, I SO need a punchin bag. I wud tayp pikshurs of varyus peeplol awn it an have attit!
mebbeh U boff just needs to go different cornurs of deh
house an pout
sometime afta all deh “communicating” dat whut wurks fur
hubcat an me
Wun preechur I knew cawled arguin oar fitin, “passhunit momints of heeted diskusshun”.
I lyked dat.
ub MENZ dat needz torchin?
… ob akwa-fobik peeplz dat u needz tu put in der playse?
Ahm mmmeeellllltttiiiiiinnngggg!
Aifink shez juss got a list ob beri durtee boifrenz.
But den, wud u reelee wanna chaynj dat by warshin dem?
Boifrenz? Me? Ware?
**luuks owt window**
Nope no lien forrmin owt dere.
My list iz of peeplol dat need teh beetin. An nawt teh FUN kynd! **grumblol grumblol**
come an hang out wif me instead
we can goes to see deh gnu Star Trek movie
Fanks foar teh inbite, but I finkso I’ll pass.
whut hangin out wiff me or
deh Star Trek movie?
Teh moovie.
Yah, I’m teh onlee wun inna whirled who nawt care ifn I see it oar nawt.
we can goes for a beer, dere is a pub here dat makes its
own beer and has good cheezburgers as well
I prolly nawt be berry gud comp’nee rite nao.
Heck, I’m wunnerin ifn I shud eben bee “heer” at teh momint, considerin teh mood I’m in.
is a gud fing to let out Ur furstrashunz
I finkso
and don’t worry I fink U is good company
now and at any tyme
Ai nawt care if ai see it oar nawt. U want teh shawt uf summfin? Mebbe teh yagur oar teh rumplol mintz? Teh Koff syrup oar teh peppurmintz kold medesin?
Yesh, plz.
Cassie kitty says: Baftub iz OK as long as stayz dry. Nice place to cool off.
Duane luks lik a sweetee kitteh – heem brudder lukz mor sinickle …
Itz awl in teh iyz, aifinkso.
ohai Elsa_Mama, how beez Matt?
He started chemo again on Friday — the start of the transplant procedure. The fungal infection in his lungs is getting better. He is sleepy – they started him on Adivan to try to replace the delaudid he was taking …
He has almost no appetite, but has been trying to eat since they told him he will need a feeding tube if he does not start to eat. He has lost about 20 pounds in the last 3-4 weeks. He is still close to 200 pounds (he is 6’4″)- but it is still a lot of weight to lose. I will be bringing in a small blender to make him healthy smoothies and shakes .
A suggestion for the smoothies, Use fortified milk
(i.e. milk + milk powder) he can get more proteins that way. Does the hospital he is in have a comprehensive cancer center? If they do, I am sure there is a nutritionist who could help.
{{{Elsa mama + Matt}}}
The nutritionist is who wants the feeding tube!! They have lot of suggestions, but he has refused them all. I think he feels in control by refusing to eat, Lord knows he is not in conol of anything else! But the threat of a feeding tube will get him eating –I will use the fortified milk — or just get some protein powder.
You could also make yogurt smoothies, yogurt is easier to digest than milk. I am keeping my fingers crossed for both of you.
Good luck, Elsa_Mama. I see how frustrating it would be for Matt, but the threat of the feeding tube should help. Wishing you the best.
{{{{Elsa_Mama and Matt and Family}}}} Prayers and gud thotz tu yu awl. Check wif nutritionaist (sp) first, but when I was veri young I got very sick and couldn’t hold anything down. My Dr. told my mother that plain yogurt had enzymes that would help the stomach settle, also ginger is proven to help settle the stomach. All the best wishes to you, Matt, and your family.
az wun wiff life lawng tummee prawblims, a concurs wif 3KM, an ai adds taht peppermint is alsew berri gud fur tummee! owr HIV + peeps drink a lawt ob boost, but ai heers it nawt taste berree gud.
kitteh on teh left looks laik mai obiwan kitteh! he laik to sit in teh tub two, wif sweet smyle on hims fase!
Jenny & Jeff – FTW
Bring us yer sailboat toy an some meelks, an we be fine.
an donut Beez furrgitting teh rubber dukky!
*pores in melk*
melk baff good 4 kittehz skin
I haz sam showr kurtin. Wud nevr puts kittehs in tubz, tho. Dun’t wuntz scritches.
Showr kurtin, i wants! Wear u getz teh kitteh/goggie kurtin, pleez?
I haz the soap dish and trash can w/same pattern! Forgot where got it tho, long time ago seems like. Possibly Linens & Things or BB&Beyond.
I found it online about a year ago. I think I googled ‘shower curtain primary colors’ and it came up.
(music notes to indicate Ai’m singing)
What a day
What a day!
For an auto de fe
Hai!! Dem kittehs is spozed tu go bak heer insied teh fens!. Ai ordurd dem speshul foar teh rhsb ruum.
* cawlz teh ware haws onna fone *
Hallo! U sended mai kitteh torchuring debice (teh kittehs duz teh torchuring, jus ad waddurz) tu teh rong plaes! Ai needz it inna fens behind teh NB NAWT tu teh NB!. Ai nawt gunna pai gud munnies fur teh delibering tu teh rong plais!! No U gittin payed in Troll munnies if U doan shape up!!
Ohai! Ai gibs kwik updaet awn tawking tu humayn sosietee peeps bowt CoryBear. Tech tehre (teh GUD kind uv tech, nawt teh kind taht gibs bafs to porus kittehs) lissined tu awl teh fings ai seeing, frum teh nawt-innerested-in-fuds-juss-bottlol, tu teh clingeeniss, tu teh nawt sploring az much az a normul 6-week-owld kittin shud be. Her haz a conserned tu, an sujjested ai get wun uv mai vet teechurs tu luk him ober an see if tehy can eye-dentifai enny neurolojikal stuffs going on.
Her sed, if him needs it, him will be ‘dopted owt az speshul needs kitteh, tehy nawt just ship him awf tu pet store tu taek hims chanses.
Ai haz such a wishing ai cud keeps him maiself. *sigh* Nawt in teh “oh, iz a kitteh ai raized, an nao ai wants tu keeping him,” but coz him be a speshul lil boikitteh.
Oh noez, wat kuld bii rong? Do yu thynk maibii him haz hearing or seeing problemz?
Josie wuz considurd “speshul needs” kitteh, cuz hur had no clawz (awn frunt oar bak), pluz dey thot hur hip had been borked cuz hur had swaggur in hur baksyde. Turnz owt, hur had bad knees.
BTW rhsb, thnx fur the “receipe” Yu aktualli maded mii laff tudai, which wuz sumfing uf an impossible feet. THNX!
Him eever haz moshunal/sykolojikal ishoos frum his ruff start, luzing tu moms befoar coming tu me… oar him haz a bit uv a debelopmentul disordur, mebbe frum birf, mebbe frum awl teh upheevuls at a tiem when him waz still debeloping an needing stabilitee fur it.
It cud be eever. Insisting awn bottlol-feeding cud be diffkultee unnerstanding uvver opshuns, oar cud be an eksessiv need fur teh closniss whyle him eeting. Teh minimal-eksploring fing cud be coz him so berry fiksated awn us (speshullee ME), oar cud be taht him just nawt haz teh drive-tu-lern a bebbehcat shud haz abowt him whirrld.
Iz nawt impawsibul ai ober-reacting, but teh tech nawt fink so, her fink wurf lukking intu.
{{{{Cory}}}} Gib him an Eva lubz frum mii! {{{{PK an Seanya}}}} fur bein such gud kitteh parentz.
ditto, an dubblol!
Ohai, PK. Iz dey shur uv himz date uv burf? Mite he be yunger (an less developed) den ebbreewun finks he iz?
My uvver thot iz dat dere iz sumfin nawt kwite rite wif him & datz why Momcats rejektified him. Mebbe him diddint haz teh rite “helfee bebbeh kitteh” smell. Aifink datz wut happened wif the bebbeh raccoon we tayked caer uv fur a fyoo dayz (a fyoo yeerz bak).
{{{{{P-K, Seanya, Cory-Bear, and all the kittehs}}}}
I have those same curtains on my shower (:
I is bad catmommee, I has that shower curtain. Srsly.
Dat duzzint maek u a bad catmommee — it just maeks u a bad sadist.
omg i have those curtains in my bathroom!
I have those same shower curtains. Great taste
Iz remindings me of dis book!
iz totaly like “oh, I iz small fluffy dumb” and “I iz worldly smartcat”
I nameded my cat after dis book!
Grumblebunny
ps plz to buy from local bookstoers if u can kthx
Hows did dem kittehs gets in aur bafftubz? Our hooman even haz dat kurtin in wallpaperz and on da liteswitchez
Eye lub dat showr kurtin, wear kan eye gets won?
Google cat and dog shower curtain – continue from there.
Ohai. our hooman gotz da kurtin at da JCPenneyz. Dey had all sortz ub cessoriez to gowif it, rugz, kurtin hanger fingies an towlz.
ai has that shour kurtin!
This one DEFINITELY gets bonus points for naming the `other’ cat Duane.
Subtlety WIN.
Hey, mai kittehs lurv to giv the goggie his baff. An we havs teh same kurtin too!! And matching toilet seat cover, to boot!! I fink from Tar-get.
omg!!! i have that same shower curtain ahaha lolz
I haz dis curtain in muh baffroom! Huzzah!