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first!
*whispers* It is nawt a gud eye deer 2 claym dat u aer first – it’s `barrassin wen u aer rong! We trie 2 sai sumfing witty bowt teh pikchoor den iffn u aer nawt sekund u will be offurred congratshumalayshuns, drinks an dansis. We doan’t liek 2 yooze teh “f” werd – we fink it iz moar purrlite 2 sai nawt sekund oar fruvest frum last. Plz 2 aksept dis as kindlee adbies, nawt kritisisum!
Tu bad it duzznt kownt (didnt say nuffin klebber bowt teh pikshur)
Nawt so grate, akshullee.
Luuks liek there iz a dent souf uv Hawaii. Sumwun’s gonna haz to pay fur dat!
Pacific Ocean lukkin a little ruff tu.
Pacific Oshun iz a goggie?
an sinse wen iz teh pafisik oshun blak???
Mebbe dere wuz anudder Exxon Valdez insidint?
ooh, taht wuld do it all rite
Konga-rats NS fur toppin teh foar-way brayd!
*dans-dans-notrollusprimus-dans-dans*
Conga Ratz NS. U can haz teh frootee drink in teh cocomonut wif a brella awn it. Sins teh Hawaii is in teh lol.
Conga ratz will du teh hula hula hoop dans fur U.
Wii can haz teh poi fur noms wif teh otter luau fuds.
Poi, do nawt want (but fankies). Otter luau fuds, yesh plz!
*noms sum pineapplol*
*dunks pineapplol in hur froottee drink*
Mmmm – datz gud eetz! Niec jawb, WRr!
Wii can has piggie wif applol in himz mouf?
Whai nawt. U no wear teh pinny gig haz gotten tu?
Lukks kwite eezzee
Da bebbeh luks juss lik Petey. Da same colerin an beeg boi.
I think Petey must be bootuful too.
It’z a small wurld after awl, kitteh!
AAAAHHH Ere Werm!!!!
Yur welkum!
I gibbed it tu mineself tu.
Tu bad dat song iz still runnin round in mine head. I’ll end up singin it owt loud shortly.
**cubbers eers wif a kwikness**
heer’z a differunt wun!
“hee’z got teh hole wirld inniz hanz,
hee’z got teh hole wyde wirld inniz hanz…”
*everybuddy!*
“hee’z got teh hole wirld inniz hanz,
hee’z got teh hole wirld inniz hanz!”
Hey!! Yu nawt lyke tu hear da voice uf an angel?
Angel? Ware?
**luuks arown**
No angels heer!
*giggle*
An heer be owr theem song: Angel? Nope.
Ohh, I lub dat song. Remyndz mii uf da year mine sister taked mii awn spring break wif her wen shii wuz in kollege.
. I wuz 16!
hiding inna closet.
Iz waiting till morning tu prise U. ♪
You’ve got to
Kiss an angel good morning
and let you know you think about her when you’re gone
Kiss an angel good morning
and love her like the devil when you get back home
Iz opposite at mine howse. Hubbikat kisses devil in da mornin.
Iz yoo warin bloo dress?
I shudda been borned Gemini, cuz I has bofe angel an debil sides.
I iz da Gemini, dat iz wat I tellz hubbi, kant hep it iz redheaded Gemini, I haz tu Xtreme personalities, well maybi 3 or 4, sumtymez I lose kount.
I iz Capricorn, witch iz knowed foar habbin stubburn streek.
Me, stubburn? Nope, nawt at awl.
Duz nawt fit yu at awl!
Capricorms! Me too!
*Creepy Music*
Doo doo doo doo, Doo doo doo doo…
U nawt stubburn eethur, iz u Maus?
NO! I mean… um… YES! I mean… um… um…
Diznee ref FTW!!! @@@@@ x elebenty, 3km!
Thnx NS! Wuz da nawt sekkund thing came tu mine little mind.
Warez teh peepulz? Adn teh otter kittehs?
He gots teh hole whirled in himz fayse…
He gots teh teenee-weenee peepulz in himz fayse…
is that the same kitty who licked canada?
heh
finkso himz trying to deside how mazatlan will tayst.
or possibly aklapulko. or pwerto vayarta. or possilby cabo san lukas.
.
travel advizory: plz to avoyd travel to messikan rezorts at dis time becawz ob teh danjur ob being eeted by a giant spayse kitteh. thx.
Yes, she da same kitteh – she’s bin licken da whole wurld. Aktually the spot she was licken was Ireland – I checked exact spot on the globe. She beside me nao as I type on pooter – demanding da attenshuns. Luvs .. her gotta give hugs and kisses.
Concatshoelaces agin on hazzin ur kitteh be on teh frunt page! She iz byootimus.
Thx – And to think someone abondoned her on a very very cold February night in Canada – -25 degrees. I got her from a friend of a friend who found her under a park bench.
Dat’s ok lolcat, wii gotz to strt smoll.
teh way to eet a lolephant iz wun bite at a time.
.
…or sumfin.
Plz tu maek wai fur teh Bully dozer.
Wii haz tu get him tu hiz noo jawb site.
* Truck wif teh bully dozer dribes past tu teh fenced lots behind teh NB.
Gate opuns tu let teh truck in. closes b4 enny peepz can luk insied. *
Ooh Awlmost furgotted teh sign.
* Nawt tu cross dis fence, Nawt tu fly ober area. Blastifying going awn.
Nawt tu disturb teh bully dozer wheil himz wurkz. Nawt ‘sponsibloll foar enny damijes. *
Det shud do it. naow bak tu wurk.
Oooohh! Nawtee konstrukshuns! *tryz tu luuk*
Rut Row, TET bein alowded tu haz blastifing stuf, ai doen fink iz such a gud ideer.
*** BBOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM ***
OOOHHH! dat stump gunna come doan nex tu Noms, Aifinkso!
Ohai, TET. I wanna tayk nap, butt ifn teh dozur gonna be reel lowd, I mite has 2 nap in teh sownproof room.
Himz iz onlee lowd when him snorz. but him iz teh Unyum werker so him getz lawts uf brakes.
Okaaaayyy….butt ifn my byootee sleep gits disterbed, I’m holdin U responsiblol!
I nawt get gud sleeps teh last 2 nites an I has an egg-sawshtun. I wuz strugglolin to stay awaek at werk 2day!
Becarful ob da unyun werkerz de can maek u cri.
How sew?
Hey, if dey is menz, chanses are dey will maek me cry.
If they make you cry, they will have to ANSWER TO ME!!!
*BWAHAhahahahahacoughhackcough*
Or me. Sorry. My brother’s DID is showing, Red.
Wazza madder, EM? Iz ur Iron Lung rustid?
**snikkurs to self**
Um… sure. News ketchup: go to my LOLz and look at the latest pic.
Kewl!
Wut nite iz Cheezpeep nite?
The 38th of Cunegonda. Or whatevernightyoucancome…
Or Tin Roof? Nah. Just
cigarettesfresh air with LOTS of pollen…Tin Roof Rusted? DO. NAWT. WANT!
**shuddurz at thot**
Okeh. Bro… go read a book er sumpfin…
Ohai ebil Maus! Yew haz lawst yr bloo quiltee fing, an musta stoled Maus’s's’s's’s's’s's’s's kwiltee fing.
Well… He’s me. I’m him. We’re us…
*No I’m not!*
*Yes you are!*
*Pooh on you!*
*You’re a double-doody head*
Why ohai, Teh Ebil Mausy one. Hao yoo be??
Ebil-as-Usual (of course), my Young Princess. How are you?
Ai be berry gud! (cee mi post down-therd)
Well, yes, ai gnu dis a lawng thyme agoes, butt (hehehe) ai nawt been rownd inna whyles, and nawt noes yew were trying tew integrate da mulpuplol personalities… er, mausanalities.
Integrate? Integrate what?
*Whispers*
Don’t tell him BDM. It might make him feel… um… inadequ… nonidiq… um… less Mausly…
integrate whyte maus dat Catman Ahab izz awais chasin.
Integrate…um… in kal cloo less, yes, yew integrates in kal cloo less awl da thymes.
is u telling fish stories, WRr??
Red, U beddur check teh hawt tubz befoar U lite ennyfing. It wuz filled wif Haitian rumz awn teh earlier lol. U nawt want tu haz anuddur burned down NB.
Zippo. Say No More…
Hay, I dint ack aloan awn dat hole burn-down-teh-NB fing. I had an
akkomplisinstigaytur.Rum in teh hawt tub? Kewl. I jes climb in wif a straw an drink it dry.
8 O
Grrrr! Ai meens
SPEEKIN OF FYREMENS: Okay, y’all kno dat dere is fyremens nexst to ware I werk, rite? Wail, I has started parkin in teh side lot, between my werk an teh fyremens.
Wen I came bak frum lunsch, teh fyremens wuz owt bak, WARSHIN TEH TRUK! Wun of dem wuz yoosin teh beeg hose……an I jes wented **SWOON**.
*snerk*
Cool Hand Luke, only fer wimmins?
Aifinkso U shuld ask dem tu wash teh burdee prezzies awf Ur noo car. gib U an egg cuse tu go tawk tu dem.
Were dey awl wet?
I donut finkso, but sinse I had awn lite-colored t-shirt, I thot abowt “aksidentlee” gettin wet!
That wuld have gotten their tenshions!!
**wants to say sumfin abowt “attenshun” but desydes nawt to**
There wuz a pun wif da wurd “tenshions” in dere sumwere. I gitted lost between brain an keyboard. Yu now wat I wuz sayin.
*climbs up onto teh roof uv teh NB*
*strains to see wut iz goin on ober dere*
*hears a BOOM*
*sees flyin debree*
Um — ai still kint see wut iz goin on. *sigh*
It soundz lyke teh NB iz fallin down!! HALP!!
It mite haz jus bin a can uv soop in teh microwaev, ETP — nawt to worree kwite yet.
Oh noo Dave nawt behind da fense iz hii?
Ai donut noe — ai kint see. Hmph.
*pouts*
*Sitz besyde NS an pouts wif her* Maybii wii need a ladder. I nawt aloud awn dem tho kaus I haz da “accident prone syndrom”
Watch out fur teh flying tree stumps!!!
If U gunna sit heer at leest use these!!
* hands NS adn 3KM teh Acme paraslols wif teh recall notiss tags still onnum. *
h t t p://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEjKk5Kt3rs
.
Der’z a gnu Engin-ears gide 2 catz bideo at utoob. Itz teh funnee. Ai fink mos ob himz bideoz b teh funnee!!
Thx Karen – Ai wundur haow dey can keep frum smilolin!
Ai has a HUUUUGE happytail!! Ai gots mah stoopy bracez off tew-day!
Yaaaay! I got mine off… um… mumble35mumble… years ago. But it’s still great! Now you can chew gum and… um… kiss boys (with-or-without-braces
) and… um… Stuff!
.
Enjoy!
Wuz yoo glad u kin kiss boyz wen u gotted ur braces awf, EM?
I gotted hit inna mouf wif a basketball whiel I wuz warin my braces. I hadda go to teh baffroom an carefullee pull my lip outta teh metlol.
I sorta met Mrs. Maus that way… ‘Cept it wuz Frisbee…
EM! Wut u doing here so late? Did you get detenshun?
Nah. Waitin’ fer Mrs. Maus to come home. We hasta move Maus Daughter outta her haus tihs weakend. Pleh. ‘Cept she gotta eggsalad summer program at GW.
.
And… *Drumroll*
.
Tehre’s a gurl wif her eggzact same name (!!!) inna program! 16 gurls from all over teh USA, and @ has the same name! Go figger!
U hitted Mrs Maus wif a frizbee? Oh my.
Wuz it aksidentlol oar aksidentlol-awn-porpoise?
*snikerz*
Yes.
**sighs**
I wish sumwun wud hit ME wif a frizbee….
*BONK!!*
Gee, fanks.
Nawt egg-zacklee wut I meened, but iz the thot dat cowntz, rite?
Um… yesh. Did I break yer glasses too?
*Looooooong story*
Gotta sign off. See y’all tomorrow!
Bye Maus!
Tar Tar!
Ohai rhsb! how iz Uz today?
Ohai, 2_k.
I’m berry tyred. I nawt sleeped gud teh last 2 nites, an wuz strugglolin to stay awake at werk 2day!
How u doin? Wut u been up 2 latelee?
ohai Red!
I has a tired too. I’m sposed to be werkin out, but I can’t make myself go do it!
Iz yoo drinkin teh wine insted?
Hay, wif ur boss gone, u shud nawt has to werk as hard, rite?
nah.. I just camed hoem. it was an outseid thing, and it was looking liek rain… AGAIN!
U must be gettin teh down-poors wii had yesturday. Wuz awful.
Today wuz nawt bad, wevver-wize.
we’ve had em three days inna row now!
today is ackshully teh best so far.. just rain showers, not too much thundurs.
czech Ur fax mashin. Ai will send U teh roe bote rite awai. Nawt can haz U fludded wifout teh bote.
Concatshoelaces! Ai got mine off 26 yeerz ago teh week week weekend befoar last.
Ai can haz a jellus. Can Ai sen u teh liszt of tihngs u can has on mai be 1/2? Teh corm on teh kob, teh bay gulls wif creemee cheez. 2dai Ai had 2 eet a poboy wif a nife adn 4k. M bare assin.
Fankee! Ai has a pak of gum jus waitin fer me!! About teh boyz, nawt yet. Ai kinda, MABEY lyk sumone a littlol, but(!) nawt tat much yet.
(Tat waz supposted tew be a reply tew EM an RHSB)
Well, take your time. My baby (who is 21 now) just found a good BF this past summer. Too busy to frackle around with “critters”, as she says…
Dat be gud advice!
Mmmm, mi nawt-seccund pice ob gum in a yeer an a half!!
Aifinkso. Be True To Yourself (and otter platypussyitudes).
*Do Otters has a Philosophy*
*Or a Fredosophy*
Iz gud idea nawt tu rush fings. Ai waz 30 years young an mi huzby was 36 when wii gotted married. Sumtymes gud fings cum tu dose who waytz.
Anom! Ai wuz almoast 31 wen we gotted married & mah huzbin wuz 28. Weez sillybraytin owr 10th anniversary in September!
Luks liek kitteh has himz ai on Canadia. Him can start teh domunashun thare…
Just NOM yur way to powr. Powdered sugar helps……
this 1 r not so gud akshully
this cat is so cute try a dog and a cat singing together to miley cyrus that would be fuuny
Dose dat meen i has wurld dominashun 2?
WOAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!