Tell me again … Who is man’s best friend?
but i thot i wuz ur best frend. (via I Has A Hotdog)
picture: KarliePup. lol caption: katipie
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U can’t come throo heer
tho, purty mush anee goggie ai’ve eber had wud stil tri tew jam himseff fru dere
Yep, dat wun lukks az iffn him iz goin 2 trie 2 follo teh kitteh!
Lukks lyk mebbe heez tryd befoar, adn is nao reezynd tu teh fakt dat teh kitteh roolz.
Mai goggie wuud just jump ober teh tawp. Nawt need teh liddlol door.
Myne tu!
Ya but teh kitteh wans 2 sho da goggie dat iz kewler dan da goggie. Kitteh roolz goggie drooz!!!11!
o noes! I ddnt reed yah commint raht. iz tinking yah KITTEH wud jump teh tawp, nawt goggie. Iz FAIL!!
My neighbor’s not-too-bright goggie wouldn’t even jump over a rail that barely came up to his shoulders. Poor goggie.
Con-gayt-ulashunz awn toppin teh free-way brayd, anni!
Sumfin tu drink befoar dinners? Sillybrashuns?
*dans-dans-free-way-ty-dans-dans*
Thx, Ai haz a thurstee! Ai haz been irnin moast uf teh affernoon.
Hey! That’s my job! I’m going to report you to the union!
U wazn’t heer wen Ai needid u!
All you have to do is drop it off at the NB. Easy as pi…
Oh, Ai wish!
Teh eezyest way tu get pi is at teh pi stawl, sillee, nawt teh NB.
Powrs a tawl icee-tee fur anni-ob-teh-fast-finners. Enjoy!
Thx AP! Tho it’s cawld 2dai in TTI so Aifink hawt tee wud be bedur!
*Sadly packs his iron*
Now I have nothing to do all afternoon…
*Walks back to the NB*
Itz bin cawld heer tu laytlee (well, fur heer dat is).
*Puts kettul awn, mayks sum tee, Url Gray, hawt*
*Powrs a kuppa fur anni* Heer u go, darlin!
HEY!!!! YNG!! Dont despare! Ai’ve got SIX linen blowses heer fur yoo to iren. Ai’ll bring tehm rite ober to yoo!
.
An wud yoo laik sum hawt tee, too? Do yoo laik Url Grey??
AH-hem… ai haz bin tryin find teh way tew teh nawty barn fur low deez minny years nao! an ai has a… a,,,, a shirt- thats it, a shirt what needs teh iorning…
Woah! Nice house!
Kittehs, sillee!
Unless dey furgits teh gushifuds. Oar teh snorglols. Oar tu be lettim meh owt wen ai wants tu. Oar…
oar play tyme wif teh shinee fings. Oar teh cheezeburgers. Oar teh petting. Oar…
Lettin me sleap in teh middul uf teh hoomin’z bed
taik taht goggie! STN!!
luv it!
Iz kitteh only club
goggies not aloud
no googie wants to be in a kitteh only club…
kitteh’s hair everywhere… ewh
Still, dey’d awl be alowd adn awailin adn abarkin bowt bein ekskloodifyd aneeway. U kno hao goggeez get.
only cool cats can hang at dis club
where demz does nipz and eatz sushee
is beree exclusive
two_kittehs:
afrayd wut i sed on lolephant lol mite hab been misunderstanded – hope i not maded any bad feelings!
lunarmommy no beez worried, I not offended or anyfing
why U fink I wuz?
i reeded it agin an suddenly finked taht it mite sownd liek teh qwestion i wuz referring to wuz your qwestion, not teh lolephants “duz dis maek me luk fat” qwestion. seemd if it waz reeded certin way culd be taken taht way.
.
but i’z kind ob ober-sensitib taht way. teh last fing i want to do iz hurt peeples feelings but sumtimes my wurds dont come owt the way i meen tehm to, so always after i post sumfing i wurry if it culd be taken teh wrong way. tahts just me. glad taht didnt happen.
it wuz deh lolphant’s silleh, how could Iz aks Uz dat queshun
you has neber seen me or mah butt
which btw is cute, or at least I fink so!
{{{lunarmommy}}} U iz berry considerate and funneh
I noz can be angreh with Uz
fankyoo {{{two_kittehs}}}
.
i gess i wurry too much abowt taht, but iz better tahn not caring if peepls feelings get hurted, or trying to hurting tehm, an tehr iz way too much ob taht on teh intertoobs.
Easy: Teh one whut *didn’t* threaten to publish incriminating holiday party pictures of teh man if a door wasn’t added to teh gate like yesterday, dude.
you want what you can’t get, same goes for kittehs
uh dis one went wrong…
Ai can cum in, ai can go owt.
In – owt – in – owt.
Yes Frank…
ferritfays
I’ve seen that gate advertised in magazines. The ad says something like “gate includes a pet door”.. I guess goggies aren’t considered pets?
It’s teh door that’s teh pet. Look how small and how cute it is! Ooh, can I have it, plz? I promise I’ll feed it and open it and shut it and play wif it every day! Plz?
Whut wud u feed it? Adn wuddnt dat jus mayk a mess awn teh otter syd wen u pushd it froo?
“Hello pet store? O hai. This is LCB. Lissen, u gots any Purina Door Chow there? No, *Door Chow*. That’s rite. U doesn’t? Hmph. Whut kine pet store u is?”
Um, gee, AP, I dunno. U could mabye go to teh libarry and look up some informations for me on teh care and feeding of doors? If teh libarry doesn’t has teh informations, try Home Depot. kthx
teh door needs a steddy diyut ob being helded open to heet/ayr condishun teh graet owtdoors. wif a small door, yoo hold it open a lot an it will fink it iz a big dore an hab better self-image. do dis abowt 7 howrs evree day (for best rezults, hab a kitteh standing indesisivly halfway in an haffway owt) an yor dore will gro and thrive.
Oooh! Thx, LM! I gets a pet door AND a pet kitteh to stand indecisively innit!
so, this wud make u teh Gatekeeper, rite??
Adn tu mayk it feel speshul, mebbe sum rust-resistant paint?
I don’t know nothin’ bout that.
Oh, hold on. Rick Moranis is at teh front door for some reason.
*sez in beeg spooky, skayrifying voyce* There is no Dana, only Zuul!
Sumbuddy hadto say it!
In teh LBT vershion of coarse we couldn’t afford a beeg skarifiying voice actor. We’d have to find somebuddy wif a chest cold.
Hak hak! *koff koff* HARNK!!!!! *blows nose lowdly*
Will that do? ICHC LBT R Us!
Presenting…
GHOSTDENTERS!
Adn she wudnt akshullee *hover* ober teh bed, but wud ravver be danglin frum teh seeling fan wiff wun hand.
instead of the scary dogmonster thing, I could try to look slightly menacing.
Whut to do bout teh green slime… whut to do…?
Abowt teh greene slyme – I has sum moldy fuds in teh fridge mebbe we kin yuse. It is sevral kullurs. Duz that wurk for yoo?
Pee soop? Frum teh haff-off dentid kans?
That’s betterer than my plan to recycle teh actor-wif-a-chest-cold’s used tissues.
or mabbeh some jello??
Instead of the Stay Puft marshmallow man, I has one stale mini marshmallow…
O, sry, gammacat. I didn’t know that was urs. *burp*
And instead of a luckshury apartment buidling, we’ll has to use a basement apartment. I know whare lots of those are.
and insted of those nooclear ray things, we can has Maus wif a Zippo
Oh noes, nawt TEH MAUS WITH A ZIPPO!!!!!
Oar maybee sum leftobber peeps fum Eester? Fur teh poofffee marshe mellowman?? Stickem togedder wif toof piks?
… and tehn puts dem inna miekrowave
Sawree, I has no leftover peeps frum Easter! Mebbe we kin swipe sum peeps from these peepul? Do yoo think they’d miss them if we did? (Klose up spaces)
h t t p : / / w w w . w ashingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/gallery/2009/04/10/GA2009041001969.html
*Whispers*
Psssst! Janet! I have a new LOL on my profile you might be interested in seeing
Hey Maus: Re: “Double fail”: Is this wun of ur relashuns?
h t t p://failblog.org/page/2/
Yeah. It’s my good-fer-nuthin cousin.
But such a gud Samaritan!
You has to get a Door Jam, silly.
Teh goggiez big enuff tu yooz teh mayn gayt, sillee.
Dey juss habbint traynd him awn hao tu open it bekawz he nebber klozes it behind him, adn heez tu dum tu figgur it own on hims own.
purrhaps a “neener neener neener” wud be appropreeit heer?
Ai dunno – boff seem way tu kumpozd fur dat. Lukks moar lyk royaltee ignorifying teh pezzintree, boff ob hoom kno der plays. Kitteh wawks awn froo wiffowt a glans, goggie wishez hims kud follo but knoz betteh den tu introod.
Kitteh Rulz!
Goggeh Droolz!
…
No, reely, the goggeh droolz wai tu mush.
Maibee Dr. Tinycat shud hav Dr. Woof taek a luk at himz?
…
Okai okai, maibee ai toal a litol fib. *oops*
Teh goggeh duz nawt drool, oar ravvur, dis goggeh duz nawt drool.
Jus hadda bad drool eggsperijins, didnut meen tu steeriotipe.
…
Teh Kitteh still rulz, tho!
teh goggies are very drooly, troo. altho i has had teh drooly kittehs too. tehy gets to doing teh pushy-paws on teh blankie or my tummy, an goze to tehr happi place, an tehn tehy starts drooling.
*sigh*
Ai knoes. Haz hapint wif mai kittehs tu. Ges ai’m jus in denajil.
kitteh drool iznt az ikky az goggie drool, sumhow
(niffin aginst goggies, goggies are teh awsum, but tehr moufs are kinda stinky)
That’s a great picture. The dog either looks disappointed or is contemplating squeezing throught the cat door!
MWAHAHAHAH dats mai favrite lol evah!!!
heerz burfday fairy, still kinda pooped owt (ha! get it? teh cow poop LOL? heh… anyway…) frum yesterdays festibiteez, but i wont neglekt my mishun to say HAPPEE BURFDAY to all teh cheezfrenz, lolfrenz, noofrenz, an lurkurfrenz hoo haz a burfday today!! inklooding Vgersmon, Ginakaos, an Katzi428! i haz bringed tasty fudjy burfday cakes, buttery yello caek wif crunchy topping an fresh strwrberreez an wippy kreem, iskreem, fizzy party punch, poynty shiny party hats, an goodie bags filled wif remote-control flying motorsikkles, ittybitty sekirt diayreez wif pens taht write in sparkly ink, sekrit decoder ringz, mood ringz, kanddy, an puffy trol stikkers wif googly eyes! an a big swish ob teh burfday wand to make all yor burfday wishes come troo!
———-***¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭****
.
importint burfday fairy annownsingment:
burfday fairy (and her IRL self) will be going on vakayshun May 23-31. i will doing my best to akknowlidj teh burfdays during taht time, but wuld appreshiate help frum any an all voluteer substitoot burfday fairys! if yoo wants to helping owt an wants to kno wut teh burfdays are during taht time, e-mail me at burfdayfairy @ gmail.com (leeve owt teh spaces). thx!
NIce house-too bad it isn’t pet friendly for the goggie too. No animal discrimination in my house where one goes so does the other!
but teh goggie iz gated in wher teh gud furnichure iz. so taht meenz him iz allowed to sleep on taht fancy sofa, right? an on teh nice coffee table. oh, an eet at taht fancee dining tayble too!!
yeah, well, in mai howse wud be WWIII.
Owr kittehs an goggies DO NAWT WANT to be frenz. No wun wuz brotted up togevver; they ar awl frum shelterz (plus wun stray). So we can nawt haz teh ekwalitee.
So insted, we haz this pet door!! This is pikshur frum teh pakage! we gotted it cuz it wuz tallest and widest. But the liddul door iz teh useless foar us ‘cuz we haz to put foamcore bord onna gate so goggies an kittehs cannawt even SEE eech other.
Piggehs is teh hoomins bestest fwends, uh huh, yesh.
GP!!!! how are yoo?!?!? luk, i saved yoo sum atomic caek an sum eyeball caek an sum Igor-ade an a glowy bloo martoonie an a Li’l Genius Chemistry Set an Genetic Engineering Lab frum teh party yesterday!! (on teh Cow Poop LOL)
.
on, an plz to be on teh lukowt for my thurty-fut glowy-bloo hamster wif teh forty-foot glowy-bloo tayl taht i maded wif teh Li’l Genius Genetic Engineering lab. I maded him for fleep’s burfday prezzie, but him excaped frum him z cage, an him might try to seek owt over pet rodint types for company. thx!
OMCC!!! Ai missed Fleeps burfdai!!!
* faispaw *
Umm… yesh, ai wheel keep an eye owt fur yu!
EWW! Put dat iy bakk in ur hedd ryt nao!
* chases AP arownd wib danglee eye *
*ahem* Piggeh, u put ur eye back this instant. If u lose it that will be teh end of teh fun and teh games. *nods*
And BTW, “thx” for throwing me in teh basement yesterday. Lucky for me u never gotted around to fixifying teh borked lock on teh door from teh basement to teh outsides so I was able to get out wifout being trapped for weeeeks on end. *laffs at teh ridiculousness of that scenario*
Oh, and teh pork scratchings was all gone. Mick must’ve eeted them.
* narrows eye *
* dangles otter eye *
Umm, well… mebbeh yu kin go get sum moar Pork Scratchings frum teh store plzthx? Ai has just gotten finished ‘fixing’ yur brakes.
I has a bizzy rite now. Can’t u go urself or send ur phlonquais? I’m sure AP would lurve to drive teh splortscar.
pfft! yu alwais has a bizzy!
“No GP, ai canut taek tu horsepiddle rite nao. Ai is watching mai stories. Oh, adn plz tu NAWT bleed awn teh carpit”
“No GP! Ai cannot bai yu noms tihs week week week. Ai has lawts ob sunshyne tu lay in. Go rummage in teh garbage”
Ur such a drama piggeh! Of COARSE I has a bizzy. Why u think I hired u as a phlonquais in teh first place? Hmph.
Yay! *gets intu splortskar agin*
Ahl get ur skrachee-fings! *starts kar*
By nao! *VRROOOMMM!*
*cums tu stawp-syn at teh end ob teh street, hits teh brayk*
*hits teh brayk agin – adn aginaginagin*
AAAIIIIIEEEEE!!!
OMCC!!! AP!!! Yoose teh hand brake!!!
Grab the hand brake! Steer into the gravel!
I can’t look!!!
*puts paws over eyes*
*swerbs arown teh truk barellin fru teh innersekshun*
*spins teh weelz awn teh grabbul tryin tu rekubber*
*swerbs bakk akross teh road*
*fishtaylz a fyoo tyms, den remmembers teh hand-brayk*
*pulls teh hand brayk*
SKREEEECH
*pant-pant-pant*
* scampers ober adn pulls AP owt ob teh car *
Phew! taht wus teh close! Heer, has sum toona, is teh gud stuff yu lieks! Is yu otay?
*pant-pant-pant*
Aifink ai is ok, yeff. Juss a littul shakin.
Oooh, toona – teh gud kynd?? *nom-nom!*
Hmm… yu hyred ME as a Phlonquais tu halp owt wib fings? but but but eet CLEERY sais awn mai resyoomay taht ai is teh layzee… sea? lookit?
* shows crumpled paypers *
*bats crumpled papers around*
I seem to rember that u sayed ur resoomay was at teh cleaners and that u would send a copy later. U also sayed that u was teh industrious, hard working and a self-starter.
Oh, and did u gives AP teh groshery list before she taked off in teh splortscar?
hmm… taht does NAWT sownd liek me… mebbeh ai wus lying. uh huh, prolly, yesh.
Groshery list? Ob corse! O wayt, yu du meen taht peace ob payper wib “Pork Scratchings adn Pickloled Eggs” awn it? rite? RITE?
And whut about ur references? That Scottish piggeh and that charming little piggeh wif the charming fake Fronsch accsent? They both sayed I should waist no time in hiring u.
And whut is that racket outside? Sounds like somebuddy had a mishap at teh stop sine. Lucky I wasn’t driving teh splortscar by there just then, huh?
Huh? Whut? Oh, taht noise… notting… Awn a compleetlee unrelayted note, yu DOES has nawt forth partee inshoorunts awn yur splorts car, rite?
Oh, adn lissen… iffn yu goes arownd lissening tu adbice frum imaginary piggehs, taht is NAWT mai fult!
But… but… they was at teh interview wif u! Rember? One came in when u stepped out for a minnit to warsh ur paws, teh other came in later when u left to answer ur shoe phone.
And U was in charge of getting teh splortscar insurance. I gived u a check, rmember? It was rite back around teh time when u gotted those fancy noo tailored soots. How u managed that on ur salary, I doesnot knoes.
Oh yesh, NAO ai members…
Oh, bai teh wai… aifinkso AngelPlume mite has sumfing tu tell yu abowt yur splortscar…
Me? ai has tu… umm… go awai fur a whyle… ai’m shore LPB adn SMcP wheel be arownd tho, iffn yu kneads a piggeh fur aneefing!
* scampersawaiwibakwikness *
Whuts tu tell? Its juss sittin der in teh middol ob teh road bowt a haff-myol down teh way, ryt affer teh stawp-syn.
O yeh. Teh brayks need fixifyin.
An otter eye!?!? Oh, the hugh manatee!!!!!
**faynt**
dun wurree, is NAWT an otter eye! Is mai otter eye!
* shows gammacat danglee eye *
*Open eyes, looks at GP & dangly eye.
Faints again*
Thud!
*rushes swoonin kowch unner teh fayntin GC*
*fan-fan-fan*
Aaaiiiiieeeeeeee! nonononononono! Please to not be dangling otter eyes at each other! That’s just not right!!!!
*swims away with a slow, sad headshake*
Iz awl funangaims until sumwun loozes an eye. Tehn itz jus fun.
No!!! We kan still hab gaymz!
*yoozes iy as “shootr” inna gaym ob marblols*
See?
LOL!
GP! is RL less pleh? Thanks for belong with the hamster hunt! I’ll follow you, ‘kay?
Ohai! Yesh yesh ai hedbatted it intu submishun!
Lemme grab mai “thurty-fut glowy-bloo hamster wif teh forty-foot glowy-bloo tayl catchy kit” adn wii kin get going, k?
Deer GP – yoo cannawt haz mist Fleep’s burfday! This iz cyberspayce, az a deer frend wunz told me! Yoo can go there rite nao an still wish him teh Happee Burfday!
An ai am shur he will reed it an be happee that yoo did!!
Indeed – ENEwun hoo dint go can still go!
Its awn tech cow poop( LOL!!! ) pitcher!!
Nice house. Do Hoomins live there? Maybe it’s only a model.,
we has this gate, an aifinkso is pikshur off teh pakage! it hasta be fakey, see, no kitteh oar goggie hares ENNYWARE.
Man, he genuinely looks so sad!
Pooh goggie
Uz dunt xpect me to jump ovr do u?
hahahaha. Yeah! Cats rule!! =D
It ok- man stais hir wiff grill. u onli git baff room ‘n mom’s office. I eet cheezeburger noa. haf fun kitteh!
ooh nice house… >:)
a dog is manz best fwend (sontimez)
a diamond iz gurlz bes fwend
a cat doesn’t need a best fwend!
cause cat is awsome liek dat
Lolz my kitteh acts like that too