Now, because of your stupidity,
Now, because of your stupidity, an innocent shoe must die.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: Winnie-Wonka
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Cheezburger Network Blog
A hawribul, paynful death.
W00t!! Yay fur nightshayde at deh nawt-sekkund spot!! I duz a happee super dans fur u!!
dans, leap, dans!!
Luk! up in deh sky!
Itz a burd!
Itz a plain!
Itz Super Nightshayde!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reed comment below!
Scoose me while ai innerupt dis fred. Ai haz bad news from KCTailkinker. She fell and borked her leg. Teh femur (thigh bone) is broken and she is going to hav surgery tomorrow afternoon. She waz hoam alone and she gnu immediately thet she had borked sumfin. Gud thin she has gud lungz; it took about a half an hour for a neighbor to hear her hollerin for halp. She will be facing weeks uf recovery and moar physical therapy again. Cheezfrends please to be sendin lotsa positive thots her way. I will keep u posted via the Cheeztown Cryer.
pleez tell her Plasticat and Uniquekitty b finking uf her and sends her lawts uf schmoos and hedbonks!! {{{KCT}}}
ai put my e-meow in teh Cheez Town Cryer so cheezfrends can send her get well wishes. Or u can leev a message on my profile paige and aisle see she getz em.
otay!
OOOOOHHHHH NOOOO! Gib her lubs, mine hubbicat borked hiz femur awlmost 2 years ago. Wuz veri hard. I soo sorri to hear that!
Thanks for letting us know! {{{Cattails}}}
*sending heeling beems in KCT’s direkshun*
{{{{{KCT}}}}}
Oh no oh no, and just when she was able to get back to work!!
Thank you for letting us know Cattails
Wow – ai haz bin promoted to sooperheroine status? Ai haz a prowd!
…
Ai prawmiss to use mah powers fur gud & nawt fur eevil. Moastlee.
Come to fink uv it — wut powers duz ai get?
Ability to fly?
Bending eebildoers to mah will?
Controllin teh wevvur?
D…
Dewing wuteber ai want,
Enneetyme ai want,
Fings are finelee teh wai dey shud be,
g…
Gushifuds foar awl
Hepping hoemliss kittehs find foarebber hoems
Iiscreem awl dai
J…
Justeec fur awl kittehs!
Kittehs will rewl teh wurld!
Let kitteh deecyde when iz tyme tu fill fud bowl
M….
Maykin fudz disappeer
Nyn lyfs
Ossim sens ob direkshun
P…
Pooz dizappeer frum liddur bocks..
Que-t kitteh fayce appeerz wen ai brake sumfing..
Runz frew teh heaviest vases wifout a crash…
S…
Singlol-pawedly defendz teh gushifuds
Tiptoes along teh narrowest ledges wiffowt feer
Unselfishlee shaers cuddlols (wen in teh mood)
V…
Valeeyentlee killify visshus vikshualz
Wigglollee butt ob doom
Xemplify goodness (oar kittehness)
Yummee furz (teh bettur tu likkify)
Zap-zap wiff teh layzer iyz
I likez deh zap-zap wif layzer iiz!! u v full uv win tuday, AP!!!
Conga-rats, NS, awn solo nawt-sekkund!
*dans-dans-dans*
*taeks AP by the paw*
*dans-dans-dans*
Darlin’ – u danse divinelee!
Wheee! *dans-dans-spin-twirl! *
a hairbawll deff?
Killd. Ded. Deddur tahn a doarnayl.
Heeeer ai am tu sayb teh daaaayyy!
But [hee hee] dat’s teh Mitee Maus song, nawt teh Sooper Kitteh song!
kitteh duzznt kno dat. shush!
Congaratz nightshayde!!!! Ummm sorees I wuz gonna get you treets but ai has a hungry on teh way back from the store… heh heh.
Argh dis comment was s’post to be under nighshayde! Well u gets teh ideea anyways ai hopez.
Ai duz — fankies, linin.
At leest make it the cheep wuns
Nose Nose, yur Jimmee Chews are bowt tu be Kittee Chews!
teh ekspensibbiteeness ob teh shooz is direklee proporshunul tu teh elaboritness ob teh kostuum
in otter wurds, ur hozd
Hehe! My kittehs onlee skrached/chood/pooped in teh berry bestist shews! Teh cheep shews are sayfe!
da kitty look so funyy
how kan ii beze a sooper-hiiro wiff no poynty endz? Stoopy hew-man!
Yu gets speshul Poyntee Endz Ob Dooooooom!
conga-skwirrls tu yu nightshayde! **dansdansdans**
Ai bee rite bak!
**goes tu hyde shews**
Oooh – ai haz neber seen conga-skwirrls before.
Iz u shur dey iz nawt conga-rats in fancee kostyoomz?
Nose Nose, teh skwirrlgirrl tawt teh skwirrls tu conga fur teh burfdai pardee teh odder dai! Teh floofee skwirrl tayles reelee add tu teh dans, doughnchafink?
Teh floofee skwirrl taylez iz teh byootimus — an ai missed teh party.
*feels bery owt uv teh loop*
{{{{{nightshayde}}}}}}
Du nawt feel owtta teh loop, ai haz been owtta teh loop a lawt laytlee, ai hazza ickee RL rite now!
{{{{{PH}}}}} Ai hoep teh RLS gets beddur wiffakwikness!
Mebbe dis be contayjus? I been battlin RLS too.
{{{cheezfrenz sufferin frum RLS}}}
Mebbe wii shud has benefit consurt?
Ifinkso dat wuld bii a gud idear. Raise sum monies so RLS viktums culd take REAL baykashun!
Yesh! Benefit consurt! Butt (hehe) ai prawblee cud nawt bee dere cuz ov RLS. **sighs**
{{{{{{NS}}}}| Fank yu!
why duz a inocent show hafta die? why?
Bekuz nawt-so-innosint hyoomin hazta play dress-up.
Doncha kno kittehs be pre-dressd adn self-kleenin?
Must die, must die,
dis shoo-ee must die,
fur teh sake ov teh nashun,
dis shoo-ee must die…
Weber/Rys JCS FTW!
Ai onlee want tu say, if der is a way,
Sayv dis shoo frum de-si-krashun…
Clappity Clappity fur AngelPlume!!!
I didn’t fink ennywon wud gets it.
Troof? Coz noe shoo iz reely innosint. Dey’z AWL gilty. Dat’s wy eben hoomins need soks tu handul shoos.
poor shoo, I safe shoo / i lof dee kostoom
argh! shoe not show
mild mannered kitteh … for now
Wait what’s with the parasitic-twin arms?
I remember clearly how you looked
The night we met
I recall your laughter and your smile
I remember how you made me
Feel so at ease
I remember all your grace and your style
And now you’re all I long to see
You’ve come to mean so much to me
Chances are I’ll see you
In my dreams tonight
You’ll be smiling like the night we met
Chances are I’ll hold you and I’ll offer
All I have
You’re the only one I can’t forget
Baby you’re the best I’ve ever met
Ohai, guies!
Gess wat I been doin — enjoyin teh cd playur in teh car!
Yay! Figgerd owt awl teh buttins adn lebbers yet?
Moast of dem.
Gotta figger owt why teh passinjur seet belt “alarm” keeps goin awf, tho.
Oh, an I yoosed teh Crooz Contrlol foar teh nawt-sekkund tyem today!
*waves frum da korner* How yu bii tudai? Tryin nawt tu put foot bak in mouf, waz hard tu git owt, I had mine shoo awn!
Ohai, 3km! Wut yoo doin in teh cornur? U been bad? Wifowt me?
Yep! Butt (hee, hee) wuz nawt fun bad.
Kin u tayle wut u been doin?
Just bein grumpytyle, an makin mine hubbicat mad, but hii maded mii mad nawt sekkund so I guess it iz a draw. Howebber mine momkat iz gitten readi tu git mine poyntiendz! Just RL crap!
I has had beeg grumpee sinse I gotted bak frum bakayshun. So far, I has been ablol to aboid showin my poynty enz to ennywun, butt dat may chanj berry soon.
Gud luk wif dat, kauz tomarrow bii da dai iffin her nawt chang dat attitude! Hey maibii I git Friedegg dai off! Woot woot wuld bii 3 dai weekend1
Crooz Controlol iz ebil! Du nawt yewz! Yu shud be drivin, nawt lissenin tu raydio oar lettin car dribe yu! **turns off parent voyce**
Ohai rhsb! I reeded yur reply lass nyte, ai sew sawree bowt yur ex-gramma! {{rhsb}}
Ohai, ph! I thot of yoo erlyur 2day. I saw truk dat sed, “Dirty Bird Services”. Donut kno wut kinds serbises dey awfur tho!
Crooz Control iz gud wen u gots hevvy fuut lyk I duz.
Iz nawt gud to yooze wen iz raynin tho.
Speekin of wet rodes, I saw a gurl in a Ford Explorur slyde awl ober teh playse yesterday moarnin. Hur nawt hitted ennyfing oar run awf teh rode, but hur prolly soyled hur unnerwares! I wudda.
Awgeez, ai TOWLD dose YNGs nawt tu addbertyze mai services! Dat truk iz spozed tu sai ‘polly wanna crakkur? Call me.’ **sighs**
Mai dotter had hur ‘tryl run’ tu kollidge wif us (Birginia tu norf carolina), an hur yezed teh kruzz controll so hur kin luk at the raydio an phone. Ai yelled an yelled an yelled. Yu may nawt beeleev dis, butt ai kin bee a royul bwurd.
ai nose iz hard, wut wif teh drawped jaw, butt pleez tu clowse yur mouf, we are nawt a codfish.
*snerk*
*goes to get paypur towels to cleen tee off keeboard*
Mary Poppins ref!!!!! FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ai haz had mah car almost 4 1/2 yeerz & still hazzint touched teh crooze control.
Mii nether, I nawt trust it! I haz panik issues.
Ooh, an iz hard tu uze crooze control between stop litez.
I yoozed it awn teh innur-stayt, an nao dat I kno hao 2 yooze it, I prolly yooze it awn teh commyoot to/frum werks. Dat rode iz flat an borin to dryve.
mee tu! Mai standard ‘pizz awftehfamblee’ line iz, Wut if that tenth of a sekkund tu reech teh brake maykes the difference between life an deff, yurs oar sumwun elses?’ No wundur mai famblee haytes mee. Butt ai seez it eberree day at wurk.
Ai iz shur ur famblee duzzint hayte u, PH. Mebbe dey haytes how u drive — but nawt hayte U.
Dis car has moar “bells an whisslols” den I has ebber had onna car, so I’m enjoyin playin wif ebberfing.
Dis car has crooz control, faktree cd playur, powur windowz, powur doar lox – awl stuff I nebber had befoar. In teh Corolla, teh cd playur hadda sit in teh passinjur seet an skipped wif ebery bump I enkownturd.
Duz yur crooze control hab da sensor wen it iz gitten tu close tu car ahead it slowz itzself down? Mine dadinlawz Avalon does dat.
Donut kno. Will has to reed teh manyooal to find dat owt.
Yeah, read da manual nawt sekkund, nawt a xperiment tu try in RL. Kuld kaus problemz.
Iffn moar pair rentz wer royal paynes…mebbe da kidlets wud lern to drive rite! Mebbe ai iz nott cord inated enuf tu puttin on maekup, lisen to radeo, texting frens an dribin alla theh saem tyme. Ai mus begettin AULD!
Ohai old lurker! Lawng tyme no sea! Fankz fur teh agreemints, if gettin auld meenz keeping yu an yur kidlets sayfe, ai’m dere! (ai fink ai’m dere ineeway, butt, we nawt tell ineewun)
Lyke eberee one, aiyam frustra ted wid RL. Mai puter eated 3 monfs of stuffz, da bakup waz borked adn then Windowz broke. Mai Brudder sended me a neu puter, FREE!!!! Nao, ai can plai!
{{{old lurker}}} Sorri fur da borked puter, but (!) YAY fur the new FREE puter!! Weehoo! Playen keepz us yung!
Anom! Wen I wuz yunger I culd smoke ciggy, drinkabeer, and shift gearz awl wyle dribin, but i growed owt uf dat, thnk CC.
Mee Too!! I memmembers drybing to see muh fren wun afternoon wiff a beer between muh thighs ana Camel non filter hangin off muh lip. I wented to take the Camel outta muh mouf but the paper wuz glued to the lip so my finners slipped down the ciggy until they pulled orf the burning ember at the far end. It Burnt so I shooked it off, into muh lap, ware it burnt sum moar – frew muh jeans an into muh tender inner thighs. Dat wus unplezant so I tooked the beer and poured it into my krotch to put owt the fire. Werked good. I gotted to muh frenz howse and I had a piece ob ciggy papper still glued to muh lower lip, burnt finners, burn holes in the krotch ob muh pantz, and it looked like I had peed muhseff and I smelt lyke a brewery. He sed I should jest go on bak home.
Now wii kno why u shud nawt drink an dribe.
.
.
U mite end up spillin ur drink.
*pickshurs seenaryo, cannawt stawp laffin*
LMAOPIMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Xcellent warning tu awl da peeps hoo wanna bii kool!
Yesh, and teh funnee fing is ai used to smoak, and did teh same fing wif the ciggy stuck to mai lip and burnin mai finners. Oh teh dum fings we do wen we be yung.
Did yu haz tu manually shift da gearz tho?
Noes, nebber lerned. Prolly a gud fing.
I did, howebber, start mai backseet awn fyre. I tossed a lit ciggy butt (hee hee) owt teh windoe, and insted ob going owtside, it blowed back in froo teh back winder. Cud nawt pull ober rite away cuz ai wuz dribin awn teh freeway. Left a big burnmark awn teh seet. Mai dumness, let me show u it…
ICHF yu maded mii laff. Sorri bout da biiggg burn hole in yur bakseet. Still laffing, kaus had similar stuff happe tu mii, nawt so tramatik tho.
We cud be adbertize-mints for yunguns, aginst teh danjurs ob dribing and smoking!
Gots to go nitey-nite nao. See U soon!
Oh hai, AngelPlume!! I putted a linkee tu ur awsum story frum deh last lol in deh Cryerz Lore and Legendz paige. So ebbreewun kin finding it!!
oar mebbee it wuz deh lol b4 last.
Fanks, cween!
Ai wuz akshulee hopin otters wud pik up awn it, but wen dey started klappin aftur teh nawt sekkund part ai figgerd ai bettur du it maiseff. Wuz fun, huh?
it wuz berry gud!! u shud haz a prowd!!
It was berry gud, AP! @@@@@@!
Wuz wunnermouse stori, an soo tru tu da kitteh.
Aw, fanks guiz. Ai has a shy anna prowd.
Heh, it’s like Superman got squished vertically.
OMCCWTFBBQ
I nawt beleev wat I jes saw/heered….
“Tayk my bref away” (from Top Gun moovie) yoozed in a LAWNDREE DETERJINT commershul!
Who has gots teh brane bleech?
**passes teh brane bleech wifakwikness**
Ai haz seen dat tu! **spits**
BBQ???
Az bad as Majoor Thom inna car com ershil.
Ohai OL! Nyce too meet yoo!
halloo yerself. Ai jest looked at yer pro fyle. Mai nef ew iz a Zelda-geek tu. Air sad dat yu haz no kittehs yet, butt yu will!
Hao old is yoor nefuw? Mebbeh we are close in age.
i dont get it.
cos a shoe dies? BOO SHOES! GOOO LOLCAT!!
HI NATURE FREAK SESE!
IS IT A PLAIN no IS IT A BIRD no ITS …………………… SUPER CAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY !
I LIKE SUPA KAT
)
LOOK IN THE STRATOSPHERE?? ITS A SPACESHIP? A ROCKET? A FLYING ALIEN? NO ITS THE SHOE KILLER LOLCAT
*Stumbls in a plops daon at compooter* Ohai everybuddy! Ai has a big tieard frum dansdansdans class.
wat kine ob dans sing?
Ballet- on pointe. Berry pritty, but(!) painful.
Ouchie toesies! Mai nef yu is 22, aifink (blush) not reely rembrer
Nawt sew close in age, but(!) nyce to kno I’m nawt teh only one!
Ai yoosta do dat menny menny yeerz ago.
I’m pretty sure it would kill me now.
First name Jimmy. Last name Choo.
Hope you are happy now!
Nity nite cheezpeepz! Thnx fur the fun an laffz, i realli needed them tunite! :d
Eye-yam Eye-yam Eye-yam sooperman
an I noes whut sappening
Eye-yam Eye-yam Eye-yam sooperman
an I can does anyfing
where can you buy one of those??
now if looks could kill……
It’s funny, but…please get it off him :’)