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Squeeky Clean…
What a novel way to bathe a cat…
No need to rinse the dishes: Dishwasher Cat will lick them clean for you!
Of course, you’ll need to use a rinse agent to get the cat hair off…
not to menshun how clogged teh filter will be….
Mrs. Maus tends to forget to take tea bags out of her mugs. Sooooo much fun to get those out of the filter. Pleh…
*scared*
*puts on care troll mask*
NOOOOOOO non’t let dis happin!! U shud nevar baff ur kat!! Kitteh ar self-kleen!! Baffin’ kat ar teh epikfael lose an’ u is tortchuring teh kiti!! Omg teh hoomaniteez!! Teh felinities!! Fink ov teh poor dishiz!!
*taek off caretroll mask*
Unless of course, your cat is KB, and you’re required to bathe him less than 24 hours prior to any therapy visit, and KB just thanks his lucky stars he only has to do visits every-other-week.
–Elfi
So… do you have the bathing down to a science? Or is it the standard “World War III” cat-bathing scenario?
Almost a science. The trick is to trim his claws BEFORE the bathing process. Having a hand-held showerhead also helps a lot. It’s more like… world war 2.5.
sink or deh tub?
Whenz mii Elsa kitteh fawted wif da skunk (peeeeooooo…) I wuz atz collidge and mii muma had to twy to do dat toma toe jooce on herz. Weeeelllll…. letz jest say Missy Elsa wuz a fierce calico kitteh who tookz no sh*& (witch wuz why shez wuz fiting dat shunkee).. Mii momz had to putz her in da shawer andz pourd by jooce ober da top and den she turnd onz da shower to wash eet off. Needless to say — Elsa still stunked. I hadz to cum homez and wash heer. She satted in mii lap like an angle whilst I used da SCOPE mouf washez on herz. I tolded ebberywun in mii haus dat dey wuz the meenies an Elsa wuz nawt a debil kitteh …
tub ov korss. Sink too small, has too much stuff what can be holded onto. Plus, tub = bafroom = contained space for soapywetkittyescape wif not much hideyplace and much towels ….. as opposed to Kitchen / livingroom / hall / foyer / diningroom giant space.
At teh end of a tomato joos baf, mai kitteh escapded. Fortunatelee teh bafruum door was clozed. Butt wot a mess in teh bafruum!
WIN storee abowt teh yellow goggie, Elfi!
o fankoo 4.5!!! I’s happy about dat, yeth I is.
I’s gonna buyz dem a eestr paskit wif noo goggeh stuffs, liek a niess noo kollur an’ a tag whut sez BUTTERCUP. 
Is sush a naiss goggeh.
U iz nawt only kind laydee, but willin tu hellp, and noes haow!
Wuz luvvly storee abgout goggie, Gave mii teers.
lol.. death of tose dises wite the haire on it
Ohai, Elfi!
How is you and KB and everyone?
*KNOT*
i getz u out kitteh
plz knot uz 2 muches soap, k?
an koat is shinee enuff – so non ob dat shining agent… k???
kidding, I no admits anyfing. I ment to do this.
:groom groom groom:
Yesh. I iz waiting for teh rinse cycle.
Sumwun told me dere wuz a chipmunk in here.
Im in ur dishwasher, lookin fer snacks.
De kitteh read abowt dishwasher salmon an hadda check it out
Noooooo!!!! Kitteh canna b stuk. Iz mai heero & heeros doan ged stuk! Diz canna go unpunished!!!!!
Plz to nawt puts me awn Pawt Scrubbur modes.
Kenmore? hmmm….
I KEN haz MOAR cheezburgers?
Do not wash!!
Cat-gratulashun to THE Maus an miss Valesa for da tye of nawt sekkond. What Uz wanz for too sillybrat? Danses, drynkies an sumfing frum da tye bootiq?
I wants sumwun to pack up my cubicle fer me. We is movin across teh bldg tomorrow… Double-plus un-fun…
K Ai sens elebenty doosen MUGs to halp, iz nuff?
I haz cute nu abatar, but WP won’t let me use. PLEH WP.
Ai gotz to tak Petey to Dr. Tinycat for his 3 weak booster shots. Now he’s ofically hours. I haz muc happi.
TTFN
*whispurrs – u hab tu cleen ur cache an ur cheesburgercookies!!!*
*Walks up to Maus’ cubicle, eyes red Swingline stapler*
I believe you have my stapler…
Calgon! Take me Away!
Wudn’t dat be Cascade take me away?
Calgon, Cascade, cavalcade, cavalry… plz send any/all, kthxmundaystehpleh
Oh, and lawyrz, gunz, an’ munnee be halpfolz too.
kthx.
i’ll take those gunz an munniez thnk tu yu kan has da lawyerz
ohai elfi
at teh stoopy WP!!
I wanted to leeb a commint on yor blob but teh rassinfrassin WP sez I nawt logged in.But I am logged in cuz mah abatart is here an it sez i be logged in awn the commnt box heer on ICHC.
Juss wanna say FTW !!!wiv teh lello goggie story
Ohai, elfi – I also luvved teh storeh of teh yellow dog. It gayv me teh leeky eyz. I hear teh voyce of teh universe tawkin to yoo in yor storehs. I has a tuched. Yesh, yoo wuz in teh rite place, at teh rite tyme. And yoo wuz doing whut teh universe ment for yoo to do. Yoo did gud. {{elfi and her reskyews}}
Didz teh goggie getz tu stay wif boi hu needed hym?
no, is Calgon
(old commershul)
Rodney is doin it rite
see a Calgon comerchul heer
aifink ai see ur pwobems… iz gonna cost u to fix dis… ai no take muny… cheezbuger only kfanks…
kitteh r en dangr uf bein teh cleanz
Happycat donut luuk so happy.
O kitteh, uv corse ai wil hep u. rite affer ai point an mock u!
*Lol*
… Ai meen, shaim on u blue! iz bad 2 mok!
ai kno butt (heehee) sumtymes ai jus canna hep maiseff
ai duz haz tew wunner haow teh hek kitteh got himseff inn dere inna furst palaice.
an ohai KittyB!
Izza beli gud kwestjun! Kittehs dew tend tew ged inu weerd sichuashuns dat 99% ob deh tym luk beli comikal & jus simplee hab 2 b fotoed & den putt on deh web fur us 2 enjoi.
Iz cald deh “fakts-ob-funneh”!
Ohai tu BF an KittyB! Hab a naice Mundane/Mundane ebening az teh case may bee!
Ohai {{{AC}}} haow iz tammy an hurr owie?
Hai bluefan473 & AfriCat! Hope u hadda gud weekend and all?! Iz affernun heer in SA, so fankfuli Mundai iz ammost ober! Den iz onlee 4 daiz den iz weekend again!
Shees fine fanks! Teh Dr. Tinyvet said tu come bak awn Caturday acause teh stitchees nawt reddy tu come owt yet. The gud nuws izat Tammy an teh bebbeh (Smokey) r chasin eech uvver all over teh plaice. Tammy even gives teh bebbeh a tung-wash sumtymes! Luks lyke dey r gettin along jus fine naow. Thx hebben!
oooh gud for yu an Tammy an Smokey..mine kittehz still hiss an growl at each other don’t think they’ll ever get along
Waal deres still a leedle beet ov agro, butt (hee) mush less dan befour. Smokey haz “borrowed” wun ov Tammy’s owld toys an wen shee tries tu tak eet bak teh bebbeh hisses an growls sumfin feers! “Mine, mine, mine! Yu noe can has!” Soe kewt!
oooh duz sound kyoot!
we can has pickshures??
Yes yes yes, we want picshurs!!!
how did Tammy get hurt? I is glad she be fine now.
Ohai an fanks! Noe, shee wus “tutored”, dats wear teh stitchees came frum. Eets a berry small scar furtunatelee. Jus dat shaved peenk bellee, irresistable!!! SNORGLE!
Aaw! Nao ai iz beli jelus!!! Ai luv deh kittehs & had 2, but m not allowd 2 hab kittehs ware ai liv. Luking 2 moov, coz ai iz beli beli brudy fur mah own kitteh!
taht iz gud noos! ai wuz hoapin it wud jus taik a lil tyme fer hurr tew get tew kno teh bebeh!
.
KittyB, ai sended u a frend rekwest, kay?
U can send fwend rekwests? Ware does it go? Sowy, ai not kno so much yet, onlee been commenting fur last few weeks.
if u goin tew ur profyle paige u shud see mai frend rekwest.
It wil sai in red letterz ‘you have 1 (or haowever mennee) new friend requests’ den u clik awn it an den clik awn akcept er ignor teh rekwest.
Iffen u wan tew frend rekwest sumwun elze u cahn clik awn tehyre bloo naim. uzulee taht taiks u tew tehyre profyle paige (sum peeps links tew a blog or sumware else) an u wil see a brown buttun taht sais ‘add as a friend’, taht sends tehm a frend rekwest frum u.
does U has an ICHC profile?
Um, ai doan fink ai habba profile. How dew u open 1? Does ichc charge fur it?
Sowy, iz silly kweschuns, aikno, but ai reeli doan kno!
Its free, click on the button that says register on
the to top right hand side of the page.
All you need is an email address
Oh Hai, KittyB!! If u goez to mai helperz paige u will finding lotz uv halp fur deh nooobeez… adn deh not-so-noobeez.
h t t p://cheeztowncryer.wordpress.com/majik-trikz/
.
Dere b info on avatarz adn profilez and smileez adn using bold adn linkeez and acronymz and sneeking in deh bak door uv deh profilez adn lotz uv uzzer halpful stuffz.
*fais paw* it eben tellingz u haow to turn bold off.
mebbee i go reed now.
Fangs u, two_kittehs & cweenmj! Ai registered, but my naim was already taken, so nao i’m FluffyB.
I has sended U a fren request
OOpsy, ai gess ai frend rekwested teh furst KittyB!
Ai wil frend rekwest FluffyB naow tew, hee hee!
O HaiI Ai nao hab intertoon!!! Ai am sooo hapee! Ai back home too!
Welcome back KCT, we is so glad to has U back!
{{{{{KCT}}}}}
Yay for KCT! Welkum bak! Sownds lyke owr KCT wuz maykin sum ICHC converts whyl in teh horspital. *wayves to enny horspital peeps hoo may be here lissnin* Ohai, horspital peeps! Fangs for taykin gud kayr of owr KCTailkinker!
OHAI KCT!!!
It iz so gud to see yur nayme heer again! An that yoo ar well an trulee awn the mend!
.
*hangs out banner*
.
WELKOM HOAM KCTailkinker
{{{{{{{KCT}}}}}} iz sew gud tew see u heer!!! Haow r u feline?
Welcome back!
Welcome back KCT!!! {{{{{KCT}}}}}
Hooray! Hooray!!
*does fancy water ballet*
We missed you! Welcome back and *shmoo shmoo shmoo*
Yay!!!!!!!!! Oh, it b so gud to noez dat u b home and happee adn haz kitteez adn innertuubz!!!!
*grabz KCT pawz adn duz a madlee happee danz uv joi, joi, joi!!!
Dans, dans, dans, and twurl adn hop
dansy-dans, dans-dans!!!
W00t!!! w00t!!
dans, ad swing and hop and spin!!!!!!!!
Ai is so happeetail! Teh kittehs did NOT let me sleep for my first night. Ai love all frends!. Dans dans dans!!!!1! *hedbonks* Ai am remembereren every day in reeding! When the speech therapy peeps at nawt sekund were barrey serprais about LOLkat LOLspeech. Ai had so menny peeps who found ICHC and became fun fun fun when they let me do this sometime once in a while. So many therapests and Doctors and Nurses and others now love ICHC! Whats best is seeing all my CheezfrensI Schmooooooo!!!!!1!
I’m glad the speech therapy is going well. Mrs. Maus is a speech therapist, so I know the challenges you are facing! Hang in there!
Ohai, ai R nue here sinc U been gone. Ai wood like to gib frend reqwest, butt (snerk) the stoopi WP sends mi bak 2 mi profil when I clik onna U’rs. Pleez to frend reqwest mi. Pleez, pleez, pleez.
Hai, Bom!! hur profile b at
h t t p://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/pictures-by-KCTailkinker/
just kloze up deh spaisiz in deh HT stuff.
jinx!
u owe me a coke!!
No Coek. Pepsi.
its eesy to find it Bom_momme!
just go to ur profile and substitoot her name for urs in the URL.
.
but here it iz anyways! Minus teh 3 w’s.
mine.icanhascheezburger.com/pictures-by-KCTailkinker
Fanks mi Cween an skwirrlgrrl for ur mos halpfulnes. I tryded to do dat al nawt weak dae and stoopi WP sent mi to mii prifle. Obcorse aftr U iz halpful, it werked. I also sended a reqwest too u skwirrlgrrl, hoep leeza b iz ues. Alwaes halpful peepz.
Also, Petey gotted a kleen bill of helf. Hez hours noew. If ownly he could pae the bill *snerk*
Yays fur Petey! *dans dans dans*
{{{BOM}}} {{{Petey}}} U gotta a new bebeh and datz da bestes fing ifinkso.
LOL!! u ben spredding deh Cheez word!! Cheezpeepz will taking ober deh whirrld, wun step at a tiyme!!
*wraps her feelers around KCTailkinker and squeezes gently*
So gud to habs u back! We missed u, dear cheezfwend!
*schmoo*
ohai KCT! glad to see u is back!!
Ohai, KCT! Iz so berry berry berry berry berry berry berry awsum tu see yu!!!!!!!!!!
Ai haz a hyooj happy that yu be home an has yur own interwebs!
{{{{{{{{{KCT}}}}}}}}}
*happy dans dans dans dans*
Sew gud to see yoo heer again, KCT!!!!!11! Lotsa lubs beeming ur wai for ur continued recubbery!!!
Welkum back and welkum hoem! O, and pleestameetcha!
U haz bin srsly missed, KCT!! U has bin held up 2 teh lite sooo mush here, adn wii awl haz a praoud adn happii to hazzin u bak. {{{{{{{{{KCT}}}}}}}}}
Huzzah x 3!! Welcome back to Cheezland, KCT. As you can see, we are all thrilled and delighted to hear directly from you. {{{{KCT}}}
Ohai, KCT! It’s so good to see you again!
{{{{{{{{{{KCT}}}}}}}}}}
OHAI {{{{{KCT}}}}}. Ai so happitayl dat u be back to ICHC. Iz bery gud to see u again. Ai may say dat u r lookin great. Keepz up da gud work!
Wel kumm!!!
Whut ar U laffing at? I iz comfortablol and cosy
Uv korse u r, kitteh. U mented tu due dat.
.
Wud u like sum halp getting owt enneeway?
that would be nice, fanks
* makes note :sometimes humins is useful *
Iz a bootimus mild sunny day owtside… iz day fur beingowtside.
Whai iz ai inside awl day? Riting TU tests?
*sigh* Ai wanna go hoam an be owt awn bal-ko-nee wif mai kittehs!
*has a jealluss*
I has not seen teh sun sinse last Thirstday.
Me neethur! It wuz a teh pleh weakend. Feh.
it wuz a wunderful weekend herez, 2 days of sunshine
and I didn’t even has to wear glubs to drive
Yay!
Meeshigun had teh beyooootiful weekund…
for once!
Heer ya go:
☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼
fanks!
*takes armfulls of suns*
*puts on loshun so not to burn*
Aifinkso til nao, ai nawt seed teh sun sins abowt Nobembrrrrrrr… pleh wintur. Rite nao, it akshullee luking lyk mebbe, jus mebbe, tehre will be spring ebenshuallee aftur awl!
Plus gotta du quiz ai misst.
.
Ai dididid wun test… nawt so bad, but ai nawt fink ai gotted purrfekt. *grumblol* Missing a week coz uv flu sux. Gotta class at hoomayne sosietee awl afturnoon, but nawt get tu play wif kittehs an goggies, aifinkso we duing fecal samples an mikroskopes… nawt so fun as teh kittehs an goggies.
U haz to due fecal samples…..poop!
ek-zaktlee!
Jes bee glad U doen hab Petey to doe, he haz mayjoor sticki poop. Mii huzby haz berri sencitib smellr, an when Petey makez da kat pies I hab to kleen it imediatly or mii huzby frows up…pleh!!
If’n admisshun b ritten saind staytmint oar awn feelm, den we haz a deel.
Hmpf! Yu draive a haaard bargun!
PUT DOWN KAMRAS AN HEPP KITTEHS!!!
If’n ebreebuddee puttid daon teh kaehuruh tu halp kittehz wut iz nawt n laif fretenin sichewayshunz, we wud prawbublee b faysin a teribul lol shortij.
Ai admits noffink!!
Helf adn sayftee Keiiteh sez: “Ai woz maykin shooer u awlwais chek dishwosha 4 kitteh b4 u tern it awn.”
Maybe the cat is looking for the cheese
Ai no like pics like this. Phooey! not coote.
Life’s a biatch, an den u die.
dis is a coot kitteh
Kitteh coud sqwiggle hisself owt if he wants…is just tryin new taktik for sympasee an cuddulin an menny treets and cheezburgur. Old triks still wurk, of corse, but new taktik alwaies good.
i been sent
to iRack
@@@@@
Stop talking in babytalk you fools. Whoever posted this picture is abusing an animal. The police shoupd be called as well as the humane society. All you people just keep looking at this pic and making cuddly noises. Would you morons make babytalk to jewish prisoners in a concentration camp?
‘Dat wittle jooish peep dun wanna go in da showurs, iz wunduerz y’
You freaks disappoint me and yourselves
are you drunk?
second that. pictures like this alienate me.
if you don’t see the fear in this cats eyes, you should not keep animals.
This looks suspiciously like a cat I once named Yoruichi, in the mistaken belief that it was a girl. Brother dear, are you out there?
how did they get the kitty out???
It’s peculiar that Lolcats still has this on its site.