The most important step in baby sitting is immobilizing the baby….
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: jessicaqlucas
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Tag! You’re it!
*tags Maus bak* No, yor it!
BOOP!
BOOP!
*skampersawaiwifakwikness*
*Gets out his Extendy Long-Arm Thingy*
BOOP!
hands Invisiblol pro- tech-tibe auntie *boop* sheeld to GammaCat
fankee catslave! I fink Maus almost reeched me at luncsh!
Goe Goe Gadjit!
boops everyone on head!!!!
Boop boop be do ba ba doo ba ba
Boo boo ba doop!
Kitteh is waitin fer Monorail Gurl to pull outta teh station…
Elebenty burgers, Maus!
concatsholaces Maus on top of ty *sets down big plate of Sushi* here is a little something for you to noms while i makes the drinkies… Martoonies anyone?
Fer me? Fanks! I lerves teh sooshi!
Hey guys! Come has sum of my sooshi!
dere’s salmon, cali rolls, phili roles, spicy tuna, and shrimp tempura. there’s enough for eberyone so take as much as you want… *hands out martoonies and warm sake*
*whispurrs*
What ar philli rolls?!?
*inkwayring maynd – it be mine…*
phili (phillidelphia) rolls have cream cheese, crab (or imitation crab) and sometimes salmon in them, along with cucumbers and then it’s all wrapped in sushi rice and nori (roasted seaweed).
It’s a kind of California-style roll made with lox (cold-smoked salmon), cream cheese, cucumber, and sometimes green onion.
NOM!
ai secund dat!
NOMM NOMM!
Fankies for informing mai ink wiring maynd!
A lemmin Martooni if ewe plz FTKA, Shaken, nawt stirred. Kaythnkx
*hands cs a lemmin martooni* pick a flavr and flavr
*sips some sake*
Maus shuld get sumkinda prezzie for tying hisself fer nawt second, aifinkso.
Heres a big bukkit of win fro yoo [also known as teh bourbon].
Hymm-lik, yor doing it rong!
Speshully since dats a hyrr, not a hymm. A giggly hyrr at taht.
Yud gigglol tu, if yu had a big furrii sittin onyu lyke tihs.
Noes, lz verruh tikklish. I’d be larfin out laod.
Ai’ll drink 2 dat!
Ai’ll joyne yew Anni!
*hands around martoonies or frozen limonade*
Cheers!
oooooofffff!
but make shure to allow for some breething.
Gurl haz to breff
has to have breff to steal too…
Cud dis be a yung LCB? Mite explain wai seh becam a catburglar!
Yais. I am berri comfurtubbel.
Wai yoo asks?
that kawch + that pillaw tewgethur = more trubble than kitteh kud evar kaws
yesh, diz needz fuglee cowch alurt!
is fur shore NOT goin’to be babby sitteedd by kitteh do NOT wants!
hmmmm.. Raindrop — inna last twred you wanted a YNG — I tink you bee too owled fur da babeh sitters!!!
ps. My mudder tinks i still needz one cause obliviously 14 yurs old iznt old ’nuff …
Mebbe fore yew we cud haev teh YCG (Young Cyoot Guys) insted?
Ai cud prolly find yew wun.
yiss yiss i LOVES deh sound of dat NO sarcasim … i’ll take a YCG hows about a nyce YCG frum NZ his name bee da sound of Austin! black hair but no to be goth plz an Christian … pweez fanks!
Otay, ai see wot ai kin dew.
I fine ducky tape verruh usefull for teh imobilizin.
I dun get aksed to sit on teh bebehs often.
i take back wat i sed i NVR wants be bby sitted by Johnny!1!!
Jist merember, iz not illeegil to gib smorl kidlets teh booze nd valium.
Fraowned upon, shure, butt (!) not illeegil.
Tiz illegul in TTI 2 gib booze 2 small kidlets unner fibe yeers awld – an dey aer finking uv rayzin teh aij 2 15!
*whispurrs* It prolly is heer in nooziland as well, anni. Ai’z traiink to let my ebil sied out a bit moar. Iz sik of beink naice orl teh tiem.
Ai’ll drink 2 dat 2! Cheez!!!!
Cheez.
Nd then we kin werk on teh Plan Fore Werld Dominayshun, yis?
Taht was phun!!!
Well, we haz teh hole whirld bitwean us! You aer `bowt az far awai frum Lundun az possibul!
Yah, so teh dominayshun shud be eesie-peesie. I lubs Lundun.
aha – but how ar u going to share it?!?
Anni taeks de northern hemmi… himmi… part of de gloab and Kim de soudern???
or du Anni taek de left side an Kim de right?
oar – ar u just gonna play Risk to divide it?!?
*whispurrs*
can ai keeps Norbay?!?
*whispurrs*
yew kin keep Norbay butt (snikr) ai haz bisiting riets fore teh norfern liets.
*whispurrs too*
Dats ok – we can put on reely warm kloafs, bring koko and caek and lie in da snoes an watch it
Kan we?!!!! Yay – ai haz nebber seen teh norfern liets. Did see teh nawt-norfern liets a cuplla yeers agoes.
Yes we can!!!
Butt (snerk) – we’d better go far north dough – its moar sure to see it dere…
oh well – off to bed!!! nite nite!
Ai haz seed teh norven lites frum Lundun wuns – berry faynt, but cud cud nawt be ennifing els
ohai kim – duz that ebil syde haz ennyfing to doo wiv “paks” uv sheepies??? oar mebbe “gangz”?
BOOOOOOOOOH!
:ebil:
did dat help?!?!
Yah, teh gangz of sheepies. Taht and bizniz partnurs laydy fwenz hoo maek it cleer ai iz not welkim at bizniz partnurs hoem, eben iffin seh noes libbing tehre.
Youse opposed to givem to teh kidlets??
Not opposed to takem urself?
Medimcating. Ur doin it rong. Fun butt rong.
Ai pleeds teh fibth mendmint, yore onnur
uh fyfth uv mynt joolip yew sai? heer ya goe!
*pores owt sum burbun, addz mynt an iicee*
*mashmashmash*
*handz glaz tew kk*
heer’s tew u!
*klinks glazzez wif kk*
*klinks glazzez wib jk2k*
Fankies vairy mutch.
Mmmmm, teh mynt joolips be wunnermus. We noes haz tehm in nooziland.
Heer’s lukking at yew.
rite bakatcha!
Diz law stuff is oberly complexicated.
I tink I’z stik to self-medimacating.
Ai’ll dwink to taht. Cheez.
I’z drinkz to taht and eatz teh cheez. Onna crakur wit teh pupperonies.
Karnt tork. Nomming teh crackurz wib cheez nd pupperony.
*nomnomnom*
MINE!
*bottil brush tayle*
*egspands to twaice normil siez*
*narrows eyes at Johnnyface*
Ai doant fink so….
MINE!MINE!MINE!MINE!MINE!MINE!MINE!MINE!
Flix out pointy ens. Oh craps! I gots nun.
You wantz mustards wif dat cheez. Whine?
Yesh pleese. Fronch musturd plskthx
Fronch mouseturds on teh horses duvers.
Notting else tehn? Ok thnxbai!
:::zooms away wiff puperonies:::
bwah-hah-hah
Gimme bak mai pupperonies. Nao.
Doan maek me runs aftur yew.
Oh noes I keeps runnin aifinkso!
::flash::
Nomnomnomnom
No pupperonies leff anyways.
::burp::
Tahts not fayre.
Mawm, he eetid orl teh pupperonies. Maek him bai sum moar.
Feerse jungul predatur has omitted teh killing bite, meening to drag prey to lair for kits to practise on. Giggliness of prey is cawsing secund thots.
FTW @@@@
ai sekkund that!
@@@@@
an rayz u wun cheeezburgr!
Well kitteh shud stawp stawking hoomin-shaped laffing hyenas.
Kitteh kiropraktik kayr, open for bidniss!
I needsa nadjustment. Just dere. an dere. an dere.
After da adjustmint I gibs you sums accupuncturez .. otay? Yesh mii needles are berry Kleen, I lickeded dem off jest dis mornin, jest bee four I keeled dat mausey.
I sed accu-preshur, notteh punkshur! Even accu-wedder. Nawt teh punkshur!
Butt I bedder at the puncturin den the pressurin! Holdz stillz, let mii showz yous!
DO NOT WANT!!1!
Speshully with gushi maus parts on teh pointy-tings.
I tolded u I kleened dem dis mornin!!! I likked and likked and likked dem!! Dey wuz kleen enuf to eet off uv. i noes dat becuz i eeted off uv dem!
*snort*
Holdz still Johnneyface! *grabz JF and sitz on heem* Pushes the pointee ends of da floofy paws in da spotz JF sed — Just dere. an dere. an dere.* Seez, accu puncturz is goodz!!! *mumbles .. does xtwa holez bee ur fault — I tolded you to holdz still*
Iz I ded? No? Now i’z jus holier tahn thou.
o:>
Yesh… But you shud feelz awl bedder naw … no mores achies and paines … right??? Right??? You Bee surz to tell mii iffin you needz more accupunctamers OTAY???? Maa bee you needz a pointament once per da week … yes???
I duz feel beddur. Mebbeh I will take a liddel poke evey now an tehn…
mmmhmmmm mmmmhhhhmmm Otay – jest let mii no!
that wuld SOOOO be my cat right der she wuld murder me ifin i stayd in da same howse as her alone she will litteralyy tell me NO when i say sumfin’to her
*Sugar wanna sit on da couch wif Marlee*
*no*
dis be a REAL convo i be havin’
OH NOES!!1!!!!1! i says my real name
Doan’t wurree, Ai din’t notiss!
*kuvvers mah eerz* Say Whut! I diddn hear nuffin! Whut wuz that? Nuffin!
LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALLALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALA
lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala
lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala
oh – so ur naem is Dottie Katarina Fiorina – wut a pretteh naem
*is a bit hard ob hearing – but kwayt sure dats wut ai heard*
*yepp – aifinkso – uhum*
No, I hears distingly cleer. Her namez Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fana Bo Besca Teh Fird.
Hmmmmmmmssss… I heerd dat her namez wuz Waindwop Wainbow Wigglie Wammma Mammma Bamma …..
Or, maybee it wuz
Angelina Angleee Arghhhh ???
Banananana Rammma Bammmma ??
Cutiii Cucummbamer??
D….
Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fana Bo Besca The
Third. How a cucumba got in there, I’ll nevah knoes.
Deanna Dorothy Doolitlol
Ella Ennya Elegia
Franscesca Frida Frederika
G…
Gina Gushyfud Gwendolyn
Hannah Hepsibah Harriet
Imogene (Mutation) Irene
J…
Gloria Gertrude Grace
Helen Henrietta Hufflepuff
India Irene Iolanthe
J…
Giuliana Guinivere Golgol
Henrietta Harriett Hermione
Isis Irene Iris
J…
hrm… lots o names wif G H and I …
Jemima jennifurr jupiter
Katarina katie kimberley
Louisa lena lollipop
Margaret Mary Maud
N….
ok ok i’ll tell u if ya stopz wif da cheeziness alredy is … Marlee der i says it ok …marlee marlee marlee marlee marlee der dis is were i die cause ebreebodee laugh at da name
*dies quickly of embarassment*
*revievs raindrop*
*wraps raindrop in floofy blankit nd gibs hur a choklit possum nd sum hawt choklit*
Wye be `barrast? Wuz nawt ur eye deer – enniwai dere aer werse naems.
lol lyke dis ladi named her twee sons … No … Smo.. and King because she was sooooo against smoking, dat is for shur wurse or if ur fast name is Ima and yu get married to sumone woos last name is board … you would be … Ima Board and dat sounds way to much like I’m a Board to be a rell name …
Dere rilly wuz a laydee in Texas named Ima Hogg. She libbed intew her 90s. Wuz berry well-nown fur hur charity werk.
Yeah, why be bareassed? Marlee a loverly name. Not like mine.
I’z named after a poo-pot.
*snerk* she sed dont “tink uv it” Get it … *nudge nudge * tinkle it??? Potty… tinkol *snerk*
JF — Ur namez be Toilet?
lol try a …plop JOHN… porta potty …watevr its calld
Sooooooo…. JF’s reel name is Plop John Porta-Potty? Plop be heem first name and John bee middol names and Porta-Potty be heem lastest name.. Ur right — dat is weerderest name iz herd.
Heez mama musta had Porta fur da last name an his poppa had potty and so dey beein da moderner peeps heem name is hyfenatered to Porta-Potty.
Otay – dat makes da cents.
yupp 100% purrfect cents!
i thot uz said yur name wuz sugar? *scrollz bak up da bryaid tu check* yep der it iz-sugar
uhh dat wuld be dah kittehs name in dat comment i was playin’back a moment when i called her to sits on da couch wif me …
A … Raindrop??? u noes we not makin funz o ur name — rite!! Wii goofy peeps jest like to make up da alfabatizeded listz …
yiss i now but i juss wanted to haff a reson fur statin’mai name …
nawt tu bii tellin strangerz yu namez..iz dangerous place da intertubez pleez nawt tu bii furgetten dat there that iz mine momma speech
JohnneyFace tolded hiz reel name two — heem reel name be
Plop John Porta-Potty
Dats a weerd namez, butt (!) I gess dat bee what heem musta looked like when heem wuz birthed
Elsa_Mama I tried to ask to be frends, but WP tries to go to “www.Kathy – Can’t find Ur profile. If youse there please Halp.
butt(heeheehee) JohnneyFace iz a large fire breathing man eating Godzilla..i nawt thinkz mani peepz bii tryin tu steel himz
I be finkin dat i dun sumpfink wrong wit dat profilee tingee. I haf to ketch me a twain soon. Butt (snerk) wen I gets to da home (after i jumpz offa da twain) I weel twy to fix it …. OH noes — got to runn, my twain itz a comin round da mountain!!
Hai litlol sistur. Hao yew todae?
Behbeh-sittin: Yr dewin it….liturul.
Kitteh – 1 : Hyoomin – 0
psst … kitteh!! just to splain, “baby sitting” duzzn’t mean sitting awn the babeh. kthnxbai.
Drats.
Butt (he he) it wurks so well!!!
doo u meen ai habs to stop?!?!
well dats not a scari thout at all
*she says sarcastic and frekd ouwt tone* JK:lol:
Hey, kid lukz happeh. Kitteh iz in kuntoel. Howse nawt beezin a mess wen u getz hoem. Hu r u tu judj?
Happy Birthday, Annipuss! My brain is doing better. O Hai! Annipuss! Many more to you!
{{{{{KCT}}}}}
Hi sweetie! So good to see you heer!!!
{{{{{{KCT}}}}}}
Yay! KCT, yoo is bak! Hao ar yoo feline?
KCT!
Gud tu see yoo!
{{{{{KCT}}}}}
YAYYYY!!!
{{{{{KCT}}}}
ai hoep u iz heer foar a lowng lowng tyme!
Hi KCT!!! It’s good to see you here! We miss you and hope you get better soon
{{KCT}}
*beams healing thoughts at KCT*
O Wowie, KCT! Thx fur teh gud wishis. Iz gud 2 see u heer gane!
Ai’d point u in teh direkshun uf teh wundermuss partee teh guise gibbed me, butt (teehee) at ober 300 messijis, it mite be 2 much!
Ohai KCT! So gud to see yu heer! Keep gettin better an com hoem to us soon!
ohai!! {{{{{{{{KCT}}}}}}}} gud to see yoo! glad yoo iz doing better, hope yoo keeps getting betterer an betterer!!! schmooz to yoo!!
frum teh burfday fairy, an teh burfday fairy’s Sekrit Idenity, hoo iz signed owt right now so hur kan being teh burfday fairy
{{{{{KCT}}}}} hai KCT!! we misses yoo, hopes yoo keeps gettin better an kan come bak soon!! iz gud to be heering frum yoo {{{{{KCT}}}}}
Ohai, KCT! Sew glad yu is feline betterer!
.
{{{{{{{{{{KCT}}}}}}}}}}
HEY EBEREEE BODY!!!! Iz openin up a accu puncturerer clinic!!! Jest axe JohnnyFace…heem weel tellz you dat iz good service and heem did feelz bedder after I punctured heem.
Da needles arrrr alwaz kleen, I lickz dem awl a timez. So, getz ur a point amints soonz bee four da all fillz up!
i iz strezzed dat u tolded ebreeone about da insadent on da last twed but not THAT stress fanks but no fanks….
Accu puncturin iz beery good fur yous!! Mii puppeh goggie getz accu punctrin awl da timz. Shee luvs it. She RUNS up da driverway to da doorz. Iffin da pointa mint bee four herz iz still der she BARKS wif a fierceness becuz dis iz HER placz no udder goggies shud be gettin dis treet mint!
Oh yea — an no bee stressed — bee cuz i mentioneded it now wii all haz a new kinda cheezeland peep — da YCGs. Dems onlee bee heer cuz O you — so tanks and jeeps!! I lik da YCGs two!
yea so dis can be moved to da cheeztown cryer woo hoo … *doubts dat seriousli*
ANNOUNCIMINT!!!
and a question … howz wii gets noo wurd in da dictionery?? Wii needz to addz YCG and putz in der dat dey are heerz all bee cuz uv Raindrop!!
Hai Elsa
Ai is werking on teh phinisshink tutches to teh noo ranj of YCGs in teh d’Beaker Labratree. Ai shud haev tehm reddy for teh unvaylink at teh neckst lol, otay?
WHAT! r u serius … ur kiddin’righ..
Ai nebber kids.
so what happenz in dis procezz egg sac lee
Dee proceesses two makes da new peeps is a twade secwet!! Iffin she tellz u, weel dem she hasta keel u. And, wii awlz are likin you missy Raindrop, soooo.. i bee hopin dat no wuns tellz you da processess uv makin da YCGs
i has self reviving powwers so shee keelz me i cumes back to lives is gift is curse … so no bein’fraid of da murder… u can tellz me now…. because curiosity arizez…an curiosty can no keels a self reviving cat!
Tanks and Jeeps kimkiwi!!! Uhhhh… you bee needin eeny accur puncturin after you bee dun? Mayy bee you haz da tite musceleez frum wurin so hardz? i bee offerin da accu puncturin services naw … *yep, i iz.. nods wif a knowinness*
its jusss … to bad i onli has elebenty ninty nine and ukki kitty cruchie fudds .. cause i mean woo NOT wanna get pokd wiff twenty kitty claws fur tirty mins … wich is …. umm… carry da won….*grabs calculolter* 600 times really!
HEEEEEWOOOOO deer haz two bee sumwun who noes how gudz da puncterin ken bee! Iz a gud puncterer … jest axe JohhneyFace!!
OH Johnneeeeeyface — pleeze bee tellin ebereewun howz guds mii puncterin wuz …
*wispers — no tellin bout does xtra holez — da wuz all ur faltz fur nawt holdin stilll.. and az u sed — u no be ded…. so gibs mii a gud referrrreral *
how much it be costin’
elebenty hundreds pennies and sum guskifuds fur haf a hour uv puncturin… dat be lots o puncturers .. cuz i ken make 20 holez awl at wun time iffin i uze all four o mii fluffee feetz and all mii pointee endz…. yup I ken! *nods to self… *
oh noe… dats just too bad… i only has elebenty ninetynine pennies adn dat hard … ukki … pellets …. umm. gotsa go no….
*runs so fass dat it leavs da shadow behind*
OOOOhhhh, I ken pwacticin mii puncturin on dis heer shadow …
I can uz da punctr. Pleez
ahhh!!!1! *runz backz to grabs da shaddough an turnz an runz back to da were ever i was goin’*
ohai Bom_Momme y u delet me ?
Dis kouch shure is skwirmy todai!
Yew sitz on dis babby reel gud!
mazz, lolcat haz it! hoomin iz suffo-cat-ing…lulz
an heer comes teh burfday fairy, kinda late but better late tahn nebber, yoo kno, to wish a gib HAPPEE BURFDAY to all teh cheezfrenz, lolfrenz, noofrenz, an lurkurfrenz hoo haz tehms burfdays today. an today iz being the burfday ob Monkeypaw, SteamingPile, an owl_owned_by_a_rescue_kitteh!!!
i haz bringd tasty fudjy burfday caeks, is kreem, frootsytootsy party punch, poynty shiny party hats wif pompoms on top, an goodie bags filled wif yoyos taht wissle “YMCA” wen tehy wissle, for yor dansin an yoyoing plesure!!, boblol-hed bebbeh zombie dollz, kandeez, an puffy bebbeh stikkers wif googly eyes!! an a big swish ob teh burfday wand to make all yor burfday wishes com troo!
———-***¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭*******¤¤¤¤жжжж٭٭****
oooh yummi fudjy burfday caeks!! thnx burfday fairy
Burfdai caeks?! Yummy Ai haz teh noo nipz stuft tois fur teh peepz wif burfdais.
* holdz aowt trai uf noo stuft tois *
Ai brotted enuf for doze dat nawt haz teh burfdai tudai tu, but teh burfdai peepz shud get teh nawt sekkund choys aifinkso.
Oh, oh, my dawter sai this and nai she wants a little jacket jus like herz
Well you know how duagters can be!!!! DEVILS
or ALIENS 
maybe this will work!!!! :lolcat:
Oh! And Fluffy gets a 10-yard penalty for the late hit. It’ll be second down and no treats on this play. No treats.
It also helps to immoblyz babby in str8jakt for fool effikt
He looks a little happy to just be immobilized. Enjoying it much?
This cat is obviously humping this child, and she is smiling. I get a creepy feeling from this picture.
babysitting cat – takin it too literally
It seems dat teh babehsitter is akshully sitting on teh babeh