STEP 2:
STEP 2: DOUSE WITH HOLY WATER
i thot we hadz awlredde cast u awt.
picture: Squirtle the Cat. lol caption:
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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
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Cheezburger Network Blog
maik bc soup
lollig
I mean, Satan?
Congrats cc. Wat wud u liek az riward fur leedin teh macrame?
fanks, annipuss — adn conga ratz tu yu adn teh uvver foar brayderz (bob-berto, nightshayde, sweetpea adn catslave). ai’z gawt teh pleh cawff adn snifflulz, so how’z ‘bowt chikn soop wif teh brandeez innit? adn hawt mint tee wif hunny adn lemming? ai’z nawt hongree, butt (hoo-haw!) ai’z gawt teh nais pasta wif teh clamz foar effrehbuddeh…
Hoep u soon feal bedder. Chikkin soop iz berry ferapyootik an brandee maeks u feal bedder!
Basement Cat duz NAWT want to see teh V.E.T.
Ya fink? Wot wuz teh kloo?
Poor kitteh. He luuks liek heez extremely byootimus (wen nawt threatenin u wif disembowelment).
*nods* himz got deh berry plush furz. XXXtreemlee snorglolablol.
MJ, ur teh cween…..u get nawt-sekkund snorgle.
Go awn, go ahed….
*approachez wif a cawshun adn soft werdz tu soothing deh
*savij beestee.
.
*reechingz intu deh cage adn deh kitteh sniffz deh hand.
.
*kuntinuez deh soft werdz.
.
*scritchez kitteh chin.
.
* skritchez kitteh eerz.
.
*Pullz kitteh owt wif uzzer hand.
.
*Full on snorgloling engaged.
.
*Nirvana acheevd!!!
*bows daon*
We nawt wurvee, we nawt wurvee!!
I finkso teh cween needs to be teechin p-k’s teechur a fing oar elebenty!
aifinkso tu!!!
u just needz deh majik touch
Cween, u truulee IZ a majiklol purrson!
**walks away, singin Invisiblol Touch to hurself** (Dat nawt sownd rite)
Izz ma muthuh inlaw!
Niec jawb, yer Majistee!
uuum yuz can snoorgle himz i finkz i just stand waaay over heer
GMTA, 3km!
Mii Elsa was a fierce lik dis kiity. Sh nawt was black she wuz caleeco. When she wuz spayed dey brought her out in da cage an sed we had to get her out becuz she wuz tryin to ripp off all da hands dat gotted close to herz and dey tout dat maabee she mite also eat eberybody!!
I opened her cage (I wuz elebenty) and she runded into mii arms and purrrrreed so loud. I dunno what bad tings dey had dund to herz!!
*snerks*
Gud comment, NS!
Awww, shux.
holy Lolteadoes
erm holy toeloldoes, erm holy toll eat lols , er nebberminez…
Spittit owt, gurl!
*try, try agin*
Holey Toe leader!!!!!!!!!!! win da purson in CHRG hazza holey sox.
Ar yu tokking abowt da sittee in Spane wair dey did da n kwisishunz?
Noewun eggspekts teh spanish inkwisishun
Mebbe iff dey maed yoo sit in a cumfee chare it wud bee okay.
Teh two mane weppinz iz feer an surprize…
D’oh …
Mah brayne haz leeved teh bilding.
…
Meh – u figgur it owt.
Hee hee, ai luvs dat wun.
nope. teh one in Ohai Oh
der was one in Ohai Oh? whenz
Nawt an Inkwizishun. Nawt in Ohai Oh!
Noe, in Toe Lee Do, Ohai Oh dey haz deh skalez.
“Let’s nawt forgit dat deh fokes ub Toe Lee Do unselfishlii gibbed us deh sakalez. “
Pore kitteh Duz Nawt Want water
Pore kitteh, or PorUS kitteh?
or mabye iz boht
would have to be porUS to soke teh waterz, but pore to be drenched
Ohai wolfie!
Ware ya been keepin urself?
i has unfortunately had to be fightin wiht teh adapter soz i couldnts get onz teh inetrwebz, unless on my sizterz compooterz, not good for lolspeeches, soz i hazent been ablez to speeks muches sos i know has a new dapter and is goodz to goes
I been fightin teh interwebs latelee too. Plus, I iz battlin a seer-y-yus case of RLS too. PLEH! Do NAWT want!
Teh GUD noos is I ordered noo lappy-top! Will be teh nawt-sekkund wun I ebber owned! I hassa egg-sited!
iz been tryin to convincesmy fathercat to let meh get one, tew no abail, tough i been told taht teh toshibas awr gooduns
ai haza MSi Wind Netbook… iz full uv win (but nawt uv Windoze, ai use Linux
) Iz berry much less egspensive tehn teh lappytop, an berry portabul.
iffen ai had mai wai my pcwould be dat way as well, runnin only Ubuntu, or atleast dualbootin
Dualbootin ftw!!!! I have both Vista and Ubuntu on my laptop, the Linux comes in handy, especially as Linux cant’ get viruses
Wow what a coincdence, for my computing report yesterday, I had to find a low cost laptop with decent specs and a high cost laptop with high specs. For the low cost one, I chose the MSi Wind, simply because for its relatively cheap, has a decent battery life and excels at people’s basic requirements.
An poor us if teh kitteh goez psycho.
IF?!?!?
ns ftw!
Fangs butt (hehe) no fangs
dat holee waddurs onlee makes da kittehs mad(der)…
GMTA! Waz mai berry nawt-sekkund finking: yu fink waddur gunna HALP???
Dat’s wat Ai wuz tryin to sai az well!
Sowree, annipus, nawt meend tu skip ober yu!
Aifinkso preddy much EBREEWUN habing teh saem thot awn tihs wun!!!
Oh, Ai meened dat u sed wat Ai thort, but sed it bedder!
Yah, YOO do dat!
Me, I be waaaaayyyy over dere……..hidin.
*hydes behynd red*
*hydes behynd PK*
…
*cheks PK’s paw* Hao iz yer paw today, PK?
Hay! Why y’all hidin behind ME?!?!?
Cuz u wuz nawt sekkund to hyde, silleh!
Well, whaddaya want us tu du, hyde in FRUNT uv yu? What sens duz THAT maek???? Sheesh, silleh red… tu much tekillya, aifinkso!
If I’m still standin, den…..nawt enuff tekillya!
Iz berry mush bedderer tuday, NS, fankies!
Yah, dowse wif holee wadder….
.
.
.
…an heer teh sizzlol….
M-m-m-m-mai, wot big teef u gotz, kitteh!
…
HALP!
egads I thought mine were demon spawn…
Step 3:
RUN.
.
LYK.
.
HAIL!
Step 3: yell “CHEEZES TWICE it’s Basemint Cat” adn get in da elevatur car.
Step 4:…
Step 4: Push “up” buttawn. Defnitly NAWT “daon” buttawn.
Push teh up button elebenty thymes till teh elebator starts moving!
GTMA Starling!
step 5: stawp teh ella vader (ms. fitzgerald mareed darth, ya knoe) awn teh elebentylebenth floar. iz a “nawt kittehs” floar. get aot uv ellavader adn skampurr wif a kwikness…
step 6: give fangs for “deliver us from ebil” prayr bean anser’d.
Step 3: proseed direkly to teh emurjensee room for stitches
Plz to nawt drip blood on teh carpet az u go.
*whispers* does aneebodee kno wut teh nawt-seckund step be?
Sai da werd V E T?
(ifinkso iz “put kitteh in teh ebil plasik bocks.” tho taht alone iz abowt elebenty-twelve steps.)
Wut wuz step 1? Put kitteh in bocks?
Teh speshul v.e.t. bocks, that is.
hoo opened da gatez tu hail?
Beetlejuice beetlejuice beetlejuice!
Um, I’m willin to place munnies awn a bet dat dis is NAWT HappyCat!
me tew, tough i odnt tihnk id get any monnies unless teh nawt seeing peoples was against mez
OMCCWTFBBQ!!!!
Cujo has come bak as a kitteh!
Oar, iz dis Church?
Step 3: Get teh Holee Hangrinade of Anti-ock…
yessssssss
good movies (just got a friends to wathces)
I’ll make poo-corn and we’z wathces tehm.
Hain’t seen taht wun in a looonggg tyme.
unfortunatley neither has ai ai needs to rewatch so i can remembers teh qwotes hes throwin round
and cpounts to threez, no moers no lesser
Do not counts to tow unless it is to go to freee.
Foar is right out…
1…2…5
(Step 4)
3 sir!
Waaait. When dids bearcat comes possushesd?
may not be her, but it captures the very essence of my Tonya-kitteh whenever she eats meets new people.
Dracula-kitteh duzzint want cheezburger.
Ownlee steak will du…
Medium rare, plz.
Prefurrublee berry fresh frum teh luk awn teh kittehz faes!
I finkso if sumwun akchooallee frew wadder awn de kitteh, kitteh mite chandj eeting habits.
Liek taykin a lump owt uv hooebber wuz neerist!
**frows side of beef at carryur**
Runswifakwikness in teh uthur direkshun.
Wot happeneded two Steppie Nawt Sekkund? Oooh! Kitteh luuking beri beri angree! *shiber*
Ohai Princess! Hao yur kitteh-gurl’s lip? Enny chanjis?
OTay, I has rolled magazines aroun upper arms and forearms and secured dem wiff duckytaep, I has simlollerly protected laigs, I has seberal fonebooks taped to chest and back, I have treeman’s helmut wiff face sheeld and ear pertecshun, fyreplace glubs, ski boots and seberal skarfs to pertect muh nek. I’m going in…
Gud luk! **schmoo**
Wii will remember u fondlee!
der is a flurry ob actibitty and den everyting is obsurred by falling bits of ‘Is Marfa Stooert Libbing?’ an ‘Bonehead Appitite’ and yellow pages accompanied by hissing and screaming an sumwun shreiking lyke a liddlol skool gurl….
Oh, dis is nawt fareing wale, Im afrayd….
Shooda wored a cup too
Ai fink nuffin less dan a full soot uv playt armur wud be enuff!
unfortunate my plate armer soot is at the cleeners gittin shined.
Bob Vee Uslee, u didn’t uze mai tek kneek!!
Bob Vee La?
*begins tu arranj memeroriul serbis fur judson*
Kitty strools owt lukkin pleezed wif sef and proceeds to warsh self. Judson is inna heap looking like Beetle Baily after a whupping by Sarge. Who knew dat pointy ends kood rip frew ski boots?
**wunders ware teh skoolgurl wuz dat wuz doin awl teh skreemin an cryin**
dat myt hab been me, I knew I shooda wored a cup.
Oh….. Then, um…..u mite wanna get dat czech’d by a purrfeshunal tehn.
Heer, has sum of my tekillya.
**pours Judson a glass, hanz it to him**
It mite nawt halp, but it shure nawt hurt.
at leest it will dull teh payne!
Ah Patron! I hassa sawng abowt teekeeya, it’s a western sawng
in waltz tyme. The chorus/reefrane goes like dis:
♪♫
Oh Telquilla tequilla,
I know I done wrong,
thares annuther dead cowboi,
and anuther quart gone.
♪♫
duz yoo hab 9-wun-wun on speed dial?
Guise!!!! I haz giant happee tuday!!
I did ower taxes adn wii b gitting deh
.
SIX FIGGER REFUND!!!
.
.
.
‘korse, 2 uv deh did jitz b on deh rite side uv deh dessimlol point.
Yay! I has a happee foar u! Enny refund bedder tehn havin to pay, rite?
I has hurd of 5 finner diskownt, but 6 Finner Refund wuz a noo wun 2 me.
.
.
Coarse, wen I nawt-sekkund reeded ur nownsemint, I thot it sed, “SIX FINNER REFUND!”
Well, actually, if you have to pay, that means you’ve been borrowing the government’s money without having to pay interest on it, rather than the government having your money interest free. I’ve been lucky the last couple of years. I’ve owed, but it was less than $20.
Do de decimal poynt and dollar sign also count? I only ascii so I knows.
I don’t fink deh dessiimlol poynt adn doller sine haz lernd how tu kownt yet.
OMG!! *cuddles, snorgles and worship!*
Love this site but all you people commenting in lolspeak just weird me out
If u coem heer enuf, u’ll start speeking teh lolspeak…taek mai wurd foar it!!1
Schmoooooz tu u Eric!!
And a floofee paw uv welkum tu Kam!!
Do the Parisians talking French weird you out, too?
Seriously, it’s amazing that you can understand it after not too long. Purrseveer, it’s worth it to get to know all the great cheezpeeps here.
you and me both…sometimes I think it’d be easier to read Russian, Cyrillic alphabet and all.
Poor kitty…is skeereded.
omigawd. This cat is seriously psychotic.
LOL!!! The picture and caption is a definite water out the nose spritzer!
luk just lik my Lillith. If I throo holee wader at her she’d splode.
…then kills me.
BTWC
Ok, I’ve never comment on a lolcat before, but that seriously made me lawl. Poor kitteh wants to keep all his bits.
so iz dis “holy water” dat which springs forth from the verrah verrah angry basement cat on da way to the t.e.v.? cuz mah basement kittehs (hadz 2 at one time) would bless mah car and their crate every time…
natas raed ,doolb ym fo knirD.
Wait, what?
Satan
!!!