KILLER SMILE
KILLER SMILE I has it.
i dont trust ur smile. u iz up 2 sumfing.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: aviah
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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
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Cheezburger Network Blog
Yer doin it rite!
Congarats nightshayde an NC66!! Wut yew want fur sillee-brayshuns?
Fankeez, ph. Bailey’s & kawfee fur meh, plz.
Mmmm…yummee
*pores owt sum kawfee inna nyce chynuh cups*
*adds sum baylees… sum moar … a teech moar*
*hans NS a cup*
ennywun else want sum?
Ai can has too plz?
yewbetchuh!
*hanz cup tew 4.5*
cheerz!
Fank yoo, jk2kitteh!!
Mai, dis bees a fien Caturdai ebe!
Aaaahhhhhhhh…
*sluuuuuurp*
Mmmm – datz purrrfekt, jk2kitteh — fank yew!
dere iz pwentee foar awl teh cheezpeeps, step rite up!
Luk maw. No cavities.
Look at yu in yur stylish Fedora!! *faints*
*swoons*
*weakly attempts to fan 4.5 wif folded up paper fan* **klunk**
*opens wun i*
Fanks, KK4!
Um, ennee able-boddeed mens owt dere who can halp tew ladeez in dis dress?
Well, luuk like we on our own heer! Luckily I brot a bottlol of wine an some snacks. We culd have long stretch here!!
**plops down beesyde KK4** {{{kerrykatz4}}} Ai nawt seed yew in a lawn tyme! Ai kin haz wine an sordid snacks tew? **hold owt glass wifahopefullniss**
*clinkee glasses* sorry so long to gets back, I gots a houseful tonite!!
**klinkee glasses** iz ok, ai saw yew wuz habbin teh housefull, ai wuz hopun tew joyne teh partee!
Hmm…Mehbee teh interwebs iz still misbehavin’
Letz try dis again.
.
Ohai DK. Sawry fur the delay.
The interwebs went owt jes az ai wuz gettin’ on-line.
.
Had ai bin on-line, ai mighted pointed owt dat
ai doan hab az mush spear-E-ants halpin’ ladeez IN dresses
az ai dew halping dem owtta dem.
Conga rats tu u adn nightshayde – u desiedid yet wut u want frum teh Ty butik?
Aifink sum hedfonez wif kittehz on teh eerpeeces.
u must brush ur teefs after noms…
Sos, ennyways, he ses, “Awww, dere’s nihs kitteh. Imma pet hims.”
And den I eated him.
Wif sum favva beenz an a niec keeyawntee?
The census taker wuz nawt uh cat person aifinkso.
an it wuz GUD!
That when he sez, “I thot yew were gunna PULL a fast wun, nawt EAT wun.”
Oh my, yu luukin bery stylish der, na66!! I lubs a man wif a fedora! *swoon*
Is so rude tu eet an run.
awbutt, that iz wut ai bee dewin. Ai will bee bak tu morrow. Ai lubz awl u guyz!
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{cheezpeeps}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Yew hazza gud nite, ICHcoffee!
Wao…wut big teef yoo has….
Awl teh beddur to NOM u wif.
EEEP!!!!!
*runrunrunzawaiadnhiedzunnertehbedzwiffakwikkness*
uuuhh, wayt – a DRAGON iz hiding frum a kittehkat????
Ohai UK! Haow bees ebreefing wif yoo adn urs?
wii iz gud! nawt sew gud fer 4.5k tho, ai heer.
haow be yer anklol? stoopy winter weether, wii gets it in teh norfeast!
Anklol is all fixed up adn nawt too paneful, fanks. An ai finallee gotted releesed frum teh horspital todai! Best ob all, mai dotter an her boifrend are arribing shortlee (waol, he is ober 6′) fur a bisit!!!
*Harmph!* Ai goes awai tew stew dent teachifyin fer a few dais an when ai cums bax ai find yew has been inna horsepiddle and a hurted anklol!? Oh noes! (4.5}
Fanks fur teh hug, BDM. Ai needs all ai can gets!
*UK runs bak in frum kitchen weer her wuz miksing up a cayke* yyayyy fer yew tew be owt uf horspital! and yyayyy dt yew dotter and her nawt-short (or shuld dat be “nawt vertikallee challenjed”?) boifren are bisiting! *jentlee hedbonks 4.5, nawt want tew hert her*
Um, ennee ob dat caek left, UK?
*liks lips*
Ai nawt noes if Uk haz NE caek left. Ai haz sum eggstra angel fud caeks U can haz.
U wantz teh stawberris wif it oar teh sour creems iceen?
Ai can has bof plz?
*batts i-lashes, tries to luk cyoot*
uf korse yew kan hab sum, DK! *gibs DK a bbeeeggg slyce uf cream cheese sheet cayke wif fudge frostin* enjoi!
and dere iz lawts more if newun else wants sum!
iz nawtta nomlol kittehkat…..adn haz biglol teefs!!
smyle…u iz on dat candid camera!
Subtle, but (heh) important distincshun between Killer smylol and Beguliling smilol
Beware the wiles of the beguiler!
an bewares the smylols ob the killar
killolr u meen?
I am nebber rilly shir wut I mean so you kin deside – den lemme know
Aifinks we all should be aware of da killer smilols of da wild beguilers. Let us all learn from dis, if we don’t learn, den let us compare notes.
La La La – Do Do Do. Dems de onliest notes I gawts at de moments, well dat an a C note, an I gibben dat up unlesst yo hass too fifties.
Will 2.50 do fur now? *hums musical notes..la de ladee dee, la de ladee lie*
*signs Jeporadee feem sawng*
Do Do Do Do
Do Do Do
Do Do Do Do Do DOOO
Da Do Do Do
.
Mah boifren sais ai haz a killer smilol… dat’s whut “hooked” him.
EARWUM!
.
♫ When it’s least expected – you’re elected. You’re the star today
Smile! You’re on Candid Camera!
With a hocus-pocus – you’re in focus. It’s your lucky day
Smile! You’re on Candid Camera! ♫
is there anyfing stuck in mah teef?
u has a bit of hoomin rite there.. no just.. ok u got it.
jus taht bit uf shewlayc
No? Gud.
…
Iz there anywun stuck in mah teef?
Quit it yew silly hyena. Yor killing meh.
Ooh…ow…mai stomach hurts. Ai gunna pee. Stawp.
onoe… tew layte! :-/
*handz nc66 a wyp*
♪♪♪
Oh when My Babee, when My Babee smylols at me I go to Rio, DeJaneros … ♪♪♪
Oh my oh mee oh!!
Fanx KK4! I hates it wen a ref goes sour. Dis make me feel luke der are still sum culchurred and experientsed peeps inna werld and I am nawt alone. Yer de best!
**clinks glasses** *does messy Samba dans*
We’re flying down to Rio
And we got to get there, got to get there, got to get theeerre
“I lubs dat Joke!!!11!! Elebenbty!!” “So duz yo remembers the wun about the Tiger, the Kitteh, and the armidilloh inna back ob the buss….”
Mai brain went so many direcshuns on dis one…ai thot bedder to leave it to sumbuddy else!!!
myn tu, anifinkso ai gotted a spraynd brayn naow!
F4ankly, me neeber but It duzzint end well fer the tigger, dillos gawts armers and kittehs have de kwickness so yo kin figgur it owt.
It make meh wanna curl up in a defensive floofy ball inside a frosted flakes box.
No. yu gun telling us?
Ai ges nawt. se yu awl tumoro. schmooz!
u guiz hab a lubblee eevnin naow – ai leeving adn gowin tu haz a sillybrayshun wif mai hubbycat tunyt.
*distributz lawtsa kissez awl arownd*
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{cheezpeeps}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
nytol!
Enjoi!
“An den, dere is da wun abowt da Fillosfer, da Fizzisist, and da Mafmatishun”
.
srsly… if yew wanna noes eet, leeb meh a messij.
Mine was better then that -.-
heylo deres iz new here i wuld reallies lik sum new fwiends so message me pwease
Majesstikk Kitteh
can haz fotojennikk andz
grayt beeg tooffee smyle
Kewt Behbee Cheeta
canz run verreh, verreh fasst
andz stawpz awn a dyme
Ifz Behbee Cheeta
no canz stawpz, hims juss clymz t3h
neerest tree himz can!
Jack.
*claps floofee paws*
Ohai, Jack! Hao u iz tonite?
***claps floofy pawz tew***
bery gud jawb, Jack. Ai lubs teh behbee Cheetas. U haz a wai wif teh werds.
Ohai ebereewun, Ai figured Ai wud tell ebereebudee nao sins Ai didn’t hab enuff tiem tuu putting eet in meh emayo tew teh cween abowt meh postponed space voyage. Ai hazza owee ingroan toenayle dat haz nao bekum infectid. Ai haz tew see teh doctur sew dey kin drain owt teh infekshun nda fix teh nayle. Wii haz bin triin tew tayk cair ob teh infektshun at hoem cuz Ai kant see doktur till after weekend. Sew, Happee valentines day/mid-winter brake fer me!
Owie! **putz cold rag on plasticat’s hed an bag ov frozd peez (da green kynna peez, butt nawt hour fren dat iz sweet, yew bad finkurs) awn teh owie toenayle** Kin ai git yew eneefing, plasticat?
annudder hoam remedee wud beh warm wadders wif epson sawlts…
Ohai BuddyDitzmores Mom! Datz a gud ideer tew!
yesh, he ben uzing teh warm wadder and epsom sawlts. ai kawled Drtinycat, he nawt hab tyme tew see Plasticat tewdai, hiz nerse sai tew tayke Plasticat tew emerjencee ruum! ai fink mai inshurence nawt pai fer emerjence ruum bisit fer infekted ingroan toenayl! wii keeps uzing epsom sawlts fer weekend, and kawl Drtinycat agin awn Mon…
Nawt a dokktur, ov coarse, butt pleez to watsh karefullee, nawt tew hab enee streeks ov red frum infekktid playce! Pleez to go tew emergencee rum if yew seas dat! Aifinkso dat is a ‘inshurence cubbered’ fing.
Alsew may want to try Hydrogen Peroxide. This has werked for me pretteh well!
UK, haz him tried making a “notch” or a “v” inna middlol ub da toenayl? sumtims dis wall redus da preshur ub da toenayl intew da toe. Dis is NAWT a substitute fur da drtinycat, butt (hehehe) mite releeb sum ub da pressurs and eben haz halped tew drayn infexuns a bit. An yesh, if yew see red streeks… get tew deh ER pronto, if nawt sewner… dat beh gangrene setting in!
Oar if himz is tuff, U can heet teh end uf teh paypur clip and burn teh hole in the tonail. dis will redus teh pressurs, but it can bee the payneful.
well jus lukat yer lil smiley face!!! schmooooooooooooooo s/p
ai nawt shur wair Cweenie went…….her wuz here lil bit ago……… mebbe cuz her sed her puter nawt actin up her jinxed it…………..(hopes nawt)
:::krikkets:::
:::krikkets:::
oh wellz…haopz yoo fiilz bettur suun! sew den yoo can has teh yoosadj ob teh spayshipp….
Luv iz in da air…
I kinz smellz it.
Ai smelz soon 2 b ded peeples.
Jist uhkurred tew me, dis kitteh luks lyke dat gui dat sayz ‘Ahhhhh, Ai lub teh smell ov napalm inn moarnin**
a goggie wocks into a bar…
… LOL LOL LOL
Iz uh free footed goggie.
He says tew teh bartender, “Ai iz lukin’ fur the guy wut shot mai paw.”
Yoo’ll wunder wair deh yello went wen u brush ur teef wif Pepsodent!!
oh fankz, ai furgotted wair itwent!!
Oh Hai!!
Deh Supt. sez Hai, tu!!
How u iz?
I just posted owr latest travelz on mai blog.
is gud………… how goes yer trabbels?? schmoooo to supt!!
oh ai will haz tew go n luk…….. but yew are wair rite now??
We b at Lake Murray State Park, near Ardmore, Ok. I updated mai marker on deh Cheezpeepz map.
Oklah-homa, OK!!
U dint get cot in any of teh bad storms did u?
We wuz in New Braunfels, Tx wen the front wented frew. It wuz just deh tail end uv deh front and not berree strong wen wii saw it…. sum rain adn wind, but nuffin hazarduz.
Himz sed oooooz. I finke it sowndz like a purr.
he wants tu noez how ur fat kat iz. Wii watched deh video u sent uv her playing wif deh lazer spot. *giglolz *
mai cween? ai can has a tawlk wif yoo fur a minint plz?
*hoapz dat himz wite skaelz can bii siid agenst teh wite snowee bakkgrownd*
U iz in deh snow????
wellz, lasst nite, dere wuz snoez frum UK throwink awl teh snoebawlz att meh….annewaiz, mai skaelz turneded wite……..
wut duz yoo finkso abowt dat?
Sowndz like u b part Kamee Leon. Mebbee u need tu go sit neggst tu a pine tree fur a wiylez oar tew untill u turn green agin, like ur abatar.
awwww……..
*skaelz turnz a saddish-purplol colurr*
woah…wut jusst happened?
I likez purplolz!!
purplolz is a GRATE color!
Purplol beh mah faborite cololr
ohai BDM……….. sumhow dat sounds funneeee….
ai hazznt tawkd wif yew in awhile……hows fings???
*sees cweenmj*
Iz yew teh ok? Sry abowt dat …
*comes runnin into teh ruum at tawp speed*
Rut-roh — donut fink ai kin stop!!!
*tacklols cweenmj, purrin & givvin hedbonx*
*gets up – halps cweenmj up*
*circlols cweenmj, nuzzlin & purrin*
*dusts sef off.
Purrz tu u tu, NS!! I b happeetayl tu b heer.
Just in time fur meh to going hoam. *sigh* Iz yer pyooter awl beddur, or iz yew on teh slow wun?
I b on deh old and slow PC… at least it hazn’t crashed tunite!!
her is onleee 9.4 pounds…. ai dont fink so datz fat?? hers jus rilly, rilly floofy…. ai haz tew revise mai war drobe!!! tew muchly black close
But grey looks so nice wif blak!
ai haz invested in teh cumpneee dat makes teh lint rollers!!! LOL
We needz to do dat. We haz 2 wite kittehs, 2 creem-kulur kittehs, an orinj (nawt poyzin) kitteh, and a grey/wite kitteh. Free uv dem haz teh lawng floof. Wun uv teh shorthairs sheds liek nobody’s bizness. Itz impossible to kulur-coordinate wardrobes to cats wif so menny variations uv kulur.
yew cud get a coat ob many kulurs!!! *psst* yew gettin ‘cited bout yer trip cumin up?
Ai iz!!! Ai iz!!! Just 2 1/2 week weeeek weeeeeeks away!
ai iz nawt goin to socal afterall………..ai will be goin tew Wa state coast fur a cuppla daze…… ai nawt want tew leeb noo kitty alone fur berry long…eben tho mai fren will cum n feed her… so jus a short trip to get her used to me goin fur a day or 2…
Wair u going???
ns is goin tew dinnywhirld…… ai iz goin tew Long Beeeech, WA
Dizneewhirled — fur mah huzbin’s birfday & owr liddul gurl’s birfday (sheez gonna be 5).
Diznee Whirrld??? wut funz!!! Take lotsa pixorz!!!
Oh – beleev meh, ai will. Ai duz teh skrapbookin, so ai hasta haz lawts uv pikshurs.
…
Ai just sended an emayo to u & jamama & teh uvver peepz who haz mah werk emayo addy. Nuffin big — just sendin mah hoam emayo addy in case ennywun wants to emayo meh dis week-week-weekend.
…
Cheez!
Hii sez don’t give kitty a baff oar kut itz hairz,
it wud looz a hunnerd powndz.
aifinkso teh drain wud nawt drain……….. wud nebber be teh sayme!!!
… an sheez nawt fat — sheez floofee!
9.4 pounds ob floof!!!
*snerk* Datz a lot uv floof — but aifink sheez nawt neer az big az owr Squeak (creem-kulur sooper-floof).
yew haz pikshurs?? (goes tew luk)
yew duz!!! ai maded a lol frum pikshur ob sqweek ssqweek sqweek
Yup yup — aifink there iz pix uv awl 6 kittehs on mah profyle.
They iz:
…
Timmy = earless short-hair wite (or rainbow kulur)
Tyler = earless long-hair wite
Squeak = cream-color longhair
Spot = cream-color short-hair
Skimble = orinj (nawt poyzin) long-hair
Dusty = teeny liddul grey & wite short-hair. Teh only female & she roolz teh roost.
ai maded lolpik ob yer squeeeeek…….. wen yew gets chance clik on mai bloooo….. ai noes yew goin home suuuun
Ai lubs it! Himz floof iz bery thik & bery lustrous. Kwite teh impressive kreechur, aifinkso. Heez mah liddul gurl’s favrit cuz he puts up wiff hur & neber eber skratches. She lieks Dusty azwell, but Dusty kin get bery pointy in a hurry. Pointy-endz — she’s happy to show u dem.
Ai must be goin hoam nao. Ai haz a hongree!!! Mebbe ai getz on at hoam, but nawt shur.
dis kitteh bends awl diffrunt den teh mamakitty duz……… hard tew splain but is funneeee….
*waves bye-bye as she shuts off teh pyooter*
Ai just emayoed u, jamama (see explanayshun a few posts up).
buh bai NS!!
Ohai! I waz in to see KCT this evnin. I posted an update as a comment under under Brightspot’s message. Memory problems persist, but she is somewhat improved. Ur warm and caring thots help cheer her. There iz a computer down the hallway and I promised to take her down and sigh her on as soon as she can be up and around.
Purrs and head bonks!
That is, I posted my update on the Town Cryer under Brightspot’s message.
gib her awl ob our best!!! an tells her ai haz memry prollolms tew!!!
Ai used tew hab uh Rx fur mai memory prawblem,
but ai kep furgettin’ tew take teh pills.
:::snerk:::
Ohai! dis iz DK, frum teh ranDUM mowmint!
ai’z heer tew sai too, noe, waet, fwree finkz:
Wun: Warnink!!! Warnink!!! Tumorrowz Valentienz dai!
Toow: sinse ittz teh firteemf, rathurr dan bii skaered ob blakk kittehz, izza bettur eyedeeya tew goez adn snorglolz wun!
Fwree: I can has cofee, hoo wuz teh winnurr ob teh ranDUM mowmint swiipstaekz, iz wantink tew let sumwun eles yoos hur praez, rathur dan hur…..eggspeshuallee sum ob teh peepz dat hab been inn teh hawpspitlol reesentlee…sew iff annewun biiz wantink tew yooze itt, den maek shur tew tell eithur meh, hur, oar bettur, bofe….
annewaez, dat iz awl ai wantz tew sai heer……..
wayte, wayte, ai fink ai had mai eyez clozed! come bak! taik it agin!
Ai has a sad… Ai bin feedin sum street-kittehs, an mai faborit wus an older orange/ginger female. She had a problem wif her mowf an cudn eet teh kibble. Awlso she wus eggspecten teh bebbehs. Soe ai gabe teh otter kittehs kibble, but teh owls-mommeh gotz teh gushifuds. Ai wud wait tu see she ate it all an teh ovvers wudn steel it fdrum her. Fur abowt twoo week weeek weeeeks she waited fur mee ebery mornin fur her noms. Den, fur two days dere wus noe sign ov hur. Ai had teh wurried. Dis moarnin teh buildin super towld mee dat she had died. Mai ownlee consolation iz dat at leest shee wusn too hungry fur the last cupple o’ days.
O AC, taht iz sew sad but u tride tew help her an teh otter kittehs, nawt mannee peeps wud dew taht. Ai kno she iz in teh meadow naow, well an happee an tellin awl hour hart kittehs an puppehs an awl teh critters bout her nyce hooman frend {{{{AfriCat}}}}
Fanks bf, yu has a bootiful soul!
{{{Africat}}} I know how attached you can get to the street kitties! There was an old mama kitty when I worked in South America that lived close to my apartment – she was skinny and had mange, and was pregnant, and very suspicious of humans. I put food out for her, and sat quietly close by until finally she trusted me to touch her, and then she finally followed me into the apartment and let me give her a couple of baths with medicated shampoo. (I couldn’t believe it – no pointy ends at all!) Her mange was healing nicely and she was putting on weight when she disappeared. I have a suspicion that one of the other apartment dwellers had the maintenance people kill her because she would meow at my door when I wasn’t home. I was very sad when she disappeared.
My sympathies on the loss of your street kitty – you were very kind to help the poor strays.
Fanks Harry.
What “tiger”? LOLZ, Uneducated Win!
Thank-you xD I had to come over to the comments to see if anyone else had noticed that. How dare they label a cheetah a tiger!
**cheez!** no cavities in this one!