Liar. Space mashine nawt akshully goe tu moon.

Liar. Space mashine nawt akshully goe tu moon. Only maed me barf.
heer. u can cum wif me in mah space macheen.
picture: Digi-cat.. lol caption: fishyrawr
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Liar. Space mashine nawt akshully goe tu moon. Only maed me barf.
heer. u can cum wif me in mah space macheen.
picture: Digi-cat.. lol caption: fishyrawr
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.

Aiz afraid Ai cant do taht, Dave.
FTW!
Fanks, Leeza!
It were teh nawt sekkund fing Ai finked of.
u maded me LOL lyanthya!
.
open teh pod bay doors, Hal…
Ohh, yeh, beminds me of a berri funni but berri tasteless YooToob bideo abowt taht. Ai seez if Ai can find it.
Ohai {{{{Ly}}}] du nawt furgetz tu be daykorus . nd shudent yu be aslepe bai naow?
funni but tasteless.. my favrit flavr!
Wow! It tukd sum tiem, but Ai finded it. Is nawt preverted, just tasteless.
Heer:
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=uA4iPFsEW0I
OMG! LMAO!!
Sheesh! Nearlee wet mehself on that one ly!
So did I when I first saw it.
“Without your space helmet, Dave, you’re going to find that a bit difficult.”
… and the apparent lack of oxygen..!
Heh, exactly!
I’m off to bed now. Nite nite!
g’nite ly!
I’m off too… nite everyones!
nite Ly and Leeza
Yewzz teh FURss, Looke!
Weellll. u gotz it! Wot wud u leik?
Choklit?
Appeetizurs?
A dans maybee?
U wins, u pik.
U kin has awl 3 too if’n u liek!
Rite nao, teh werld is ur oyster. Or cookie, if’n u liek!!!
Ai likes oysters.
Ai maeks U sum oysters rockerfeller, wif teh nawt dry sautern wines fur drinks.
The conga ratz will du teh salsa dans fur U too.
Fanks, WRR!
Luk at tohs ratz dansdansdans!
nais 2001 ref, lyantha! adn conga ratz awn topp spawt. luks laik we’z gotsa lotsa ty-boo-teekers. waht shal wii awl drinck???
Ai wunts a strawbari dakweeri. A BEEG wun.
MMMMMMMM nise and nomee.
Wud u liek sum cheeps an salsa?
Wif gwakamollee purrhaps?
Ohhh, Ai duz lub gwakamollee.
Wud yu leik mi tu sing yu a song?
“Daisy, Daisy
Give me your answer do
I’m half crazy
All for the love of you”
Lublee sawng, Keshet!
Aw keshet, mai granmarv, grunmooth – mamma’s mamma – yoused to seeng mi dis song to maek mi sleepz. I getz all eyes-wetted when ai finks of et….
and u dint has to put it on ‘extra floofy’ needer.
…awn yur cleen clofes!
Kitteh can has last laff!
Kitteh hoo laffs lass…
Laffs bestest.
Gud advice.
tu mutch nip
Kitteh flyin 8 miles high.
No, Chuck. We didna say it would take u to moon. We sayed it would make you go upchuck.
LCB!!! U make mii go hed desk!! Ow!
but isnt teh moon where Chuck gets hiz cheez?
Shhhh! Don’t be givening away all teh trade seckrits!
So ware u bin LCB?
Werking ur floofs off?
O, that I has. That I has. Grate big ginormous bizzy these days, with only minimal times for teh goofing of teh off. But teh good nooz is that there is a 4-day weekent coming up!
oh u must be teh lukky and has MLK day off!
is u goin anywheres? a 4-day weekend, sounds liek time for a rode trip!!
I will be atwerk. *sigh*
If u isn’t out of town, we will be havin anotter burfday sellabration next Monday for rhsb!
I is staying in town. A few peeps are coming to teh area for teh Lolnauguration. and I has a feeling my guest couch will be needed. I will be seeing a fren from outta town on Monday and mabye some moar peeps I know. I don’t know yet, us know?
Teh outta town fren invited me to a Inauguaration ball — a official one! But a) he didn’t get tikkets yet and 2) he’ll have to catch his flite home too early for that to be possumble. But it was exciting to think of it. I coulda wared my chair outfit that I wared to teh Firemans Chairity Ball on teh Noo Years Eve!
Oh, and c) they is gonna has roads and bridges and stuff all closed off on teh 20rd, so will be teh tricky to gets into town anyhows. I don’t think I’ll wanna swim teh Potomac all dressed up and in chilly whethers.
Is U going for deh lolnaugration?
I was thinking about it, but it’s gonna be about elebenty bazillion peeps and cold and in spite of teh opportunity to restock my supply of ristwatches, I’ll prolly stay home and watch on teh TV. Is rly gonna be a crazy day.
I went to teh first Clinton Lolnauguration. Was teh nice eggsperience and all, but I was so much younger then.
weren’t we all?
I iz gonna watch it on TV
did Uz seez deh menu fur the lolnaugration
Menu? No, I hasn’t seed it.
*Hides menu behind back*
Is interesting, apparuntly inspired by lincloln
Dessert is applol cake
I has a grate recipeh from our Leeza-b
which I ar gonna make and warsh it down wid
applol brandee
and watch deh inuagrashunz
ooh I can’t wate to hear how u liek it!
:menu must be shinee if LCB has it
bai bai LCB gud nite
anneebuddee still heer?
*is mesmerized by shiny menu*
Mmm-hmmm. Yeah, um, drive safe now.
I still iz.
.
Heer, haz sum sparklolee napkins, tew.
ai myt has tew go moob mah car… be rite bak
OOh! Shiny menu and sparkly nakkins!
is nawt da park guy… sumwun halping owt frens bai plowin, butt (nhehehe) nawt gonna dew mine.
*krikets chirpping*
Hay! Wut am I, chopped libber?
wall, ai duz not beh seeing yew fur lots and lots ub minuts…
.
an yew is rhsb… nawt chopped livver grrl
I has been kroozin arown teh interwebs.
I needs to go to bed, but nawt sleepy.
ai unnerstand. gonna go reed Harry Potter Book 6
Ok then.
‘Nite.
hey, less ALL go tew LCB’z place for da naugahrashunz!!! yesh, we can!!!
oh, N E buddy needuh ryde? i can fits elebenteeny kittehz in my Zubarooo Imrezah
ooh goin to a ball… sounds liek fairee tale!
well maybee u can just go hang round nearby. I betcha they’ll has all kind uv sekurity out… maybe not firemans, but the sekurity peepz still wares teh uniform….
U is leeza-b, I thot Uz wuz sum gnu Leeza
sowee wuz not ignorifying U
The recipeh sounds delishus
I iz gonna put walnuts instead of pecans
Stoopy NASA
is taht Nawt Akchully Space Astronawt?
WIN!
*snkrs* I noes they Need And Spending Assets!! *humph* An now a kitteh in space, I better rite to my congressman.
Kitteh wuz awl blak befoar.
Nao has bleetch spots.
Could have been worst:
http://www.mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=3003647
*snerks*
Wut purty eies you has, LCB!
neggst tiym use OxyKleen insted uv bleech!!
Tell that to my phlonquais!
u can tell me.
Maus sooper glooed us together this afternoon.
O, that is teh turrible! Did u get loosified or is he still stuck to u?
If it’s teh sekkond thing, turn around. I wanna has a word wif him.
Well last I saw he waz still stucked.
Itz hard for me to knows, sinse he’s behind me.
Oh wate… I’d heer teh noise!!! Duh!
Guess he gotted loose.
*turns around*
Can u czech to make shure?
*czechs to make sure*
Yep. He’s teh gone. But he lefted behine a strip of furs from his behine.
Be on teh lookout for a piggeh wif a reverse Mohawk!
ew!
*turns around and around in a cirkle, tryin to see hur behind*
*and around and around and around*
*and around and around and around*
*and around and around and around*
*and around and around and around*
*gets dizzee and falls over*
*picks leeza up, leads her to teh meeror*
Could be wurser. At leest U nawt haz teh reberse mohawks. Adn Ur hair stylist can fix Ur pinny gig hairs.
Ohai LCB! Hao yew iz!?
O hai, BDM! What’s happening?
Nawt tew mush… ai waz spozed tew be student teechin, butt (hehehehe) dey haz nawt plaisd meh aneewhar… ai is starting tew hab a nerbous about dis.Odder dan dat, just shobling snoes. Wii gotted 4 oar moar inches tewday.
Plz to be keepin it up dere, ‘k?
Down heer, DO NAWT WANT!
de kitteh anna previous fred (inbiziblol snomobiel) wud lyk eet heer, but udder dan dem crazees, nawt tew manee peeps heer want eet eeder.
We nawt get teh snoes. But we gotted teh 40 mph windees. Ai hoep U nawt haz tu bee out innit.
The winds, they are a changin…
.
Wii is supposed to get da windeez after midnyt.
WOOPWOOPWOOPWOOP
CareTroll Alert!!
CareTroll posting in 5…4……3…..
THINK OF THE DRYERS!! THEY CAN’T HANDLE ALL THAT CAT HAIR!! THEY’LL STRANGLE!!!
PLease don’t do this to your dryers!
Lets see if ai kin prevent dat….ATTENSHUN EBBRYONE!!!!!
.
*puts on trollmask* Please tu nawt put kitteh in dryer. Iz nawt guud. *takes off troll mask* Mebbe dat will prevent any future attaks. *sighs* ai doubts it.
*dawns trol masc*
Don’t put your cats in the dryer or allow them access to the dryer. It is dangerous for the cat, the lint trap, and your clothes. How can you people find this funny at all, you jerks?
*dis cards masc*
how’t I dew?
Priddee gud!
We haddnt had a trollee here in a liddul bit…
Boi,go wai wai bak…..tehy were sooo friggin funnee.
An we were pridde harsh summtiems,….
IZ a pikshur!!!! teh fings day wud freek owt on……
ide put in mai toobits, but last taim ai putted teh trollmask awn, sumbuddee had left sooperglood arownd teh edges… *glares*
Well, nao da ekonomee ub cheezland is dependedeednt upon trolls usin da troll rode. Nao, iffn wii cud just collex the elebentee munnies… wii’d hab munnies tew beh halping ebreebodee heer!
I nevar bleevin goggie agin!
Whi Whi WHI do I lissen to himz????
I’z tellin Mawm.
No moar treets foar u!!!
MAAAAWWWWWM!
Ai maeded yu sum barfs…..but ai eated them agin.
Iz funneh cuz iz troo.
It’s funneh cuz itz ew.
deh troof it is often ugly
hav yu ben spendin taim arownd littlol boiz tehn?
kuz yor statemint akyorately deskribes teh filosufee uv littlol boiz… an nawt-so littlol boiz too, nao that ai think abowt it…
I has sayed it befoar and I’ll repeat it now:
Men will be boiz.
Hay! ai resemblol dat commint!
how you are, DK?
ai’z dooin okai…yoo?
ai has bin dooin finlolz dis week…..PLEH!!!!!!!!
i aer ok, fangs.
re: finlolz: well, nao you can relax. cheez!
*passes ober root bier*
kool…
no..ai can nawt relax….ai has anutthur finlol tomorrerr!
Iz funneh cus ai haz a Tuxie hoo duz dat. He lookz x-akly liek teh tuxie inna LOL, frum teh nose up. Dat’s mai boyz x-ak ekspreshun when he eats him sum barfs.
Pleh.
taht drier fing is way tew kleen.
mebbe kitteh rollin aroun polished?
♪♫
She pakkt mai bagz lass nite pre-flite
zee row ower nine A M
Adn i’m gonna b hi az a kite bai den
I miss deh erf sew much
I miss mai wife
It’z lonely owt in spais
On such a tiym less flite.
Rokkit Man!
“Grown kontrol to Major Tomcat….”
Fat in Spase? teh wun wif teh ebil chimp, and teh foodstuff mural?
I lubz deh Elton John….. him singz so gud and playing deh pi ano gud, tu.
.
♫♪♫ And i think it’s gonna b a long long tiyme
Don’t go borkin my
Don’t go borkin my
Don’t go borkin my haaaaarrrrrtttt….
Leavin home, out on the road
Ive been down before
Ridin along in this big ol jet plane
Ive been thinkin about my home
But my love light seems so far away
And I feel like its all been done
Somebodys tryin to make me stay
You know Ive got to be movin on
Oh, oh big ol jet airliner
Dont carry me too far away
Oh, oh big ol jet airliner
Cause its here that Ive got to stay
There’s a plane flyin’ outta here tonight
With an empty first class seat
‘Cause I’ve finally got all my priorities in line
And I’m right where I need to be
Where when I hear her I can see her
I can smell her sweet perfume
I can feel her skin against me when I sleep
Where I won’t miss her I can kiss her
Anytime that I want to
Yeah that’s right where I need to be
Yeah I’m right where I need to be
You can reach me by railway, you can reach me by trailway
You can reach me on an airplane, you can reach me with your mind
You can reach me by caravan, cross the desert like an Arab man
I don’t care how you get here, just- get here if you can
You can reach me by sailboat, climb a tree and swing rope to rope
Take a sled and slide down slow, into these arms of mine
You can jump on a speedy colt, cross the border in a blaze of hope
I don’t care how you get here, just- get here if you can
Get Here If You Can lyrics written and originally peformed by Brenda Russell.
Get Here popularly performed by Oleta Adams and Justin Guarini on American Idol.There are hills and mountains between us
Always something to get over
If I had my way, then surely you would be closer
I need you closer
(interlude, then repeat bridge)
You can windsurf into my life, take me up on a carpet ride
You can make it in a big balloon, but you better make it soon
You can reach me by caravan, cross the desert like an Arab man
I don’t care how you get here, just- get here if you can
I don’t care, I dont care, I need you right here right now
I need you right here, right now, right by my side (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
I don’t care how you get here, just- get here if you can.
Screwed up lyrics aside (How did I do DAT?), this is one of the most beautiful songs I’ve ever heard.
Heers teh yoo-toob linkee:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBSodK6WO_k
Gib meh a tikkit fur an aero-plane,
Ain’s got tiem to taek a fass trane…
DId ur bebbeh rite u a ledder?
wurser. it was teh emeow
My huzbin tolded me in emayo dat him wuz filin foar diborse – AWN OWR 4TH ANNIVERSAREE, no less!
.
.
.
Jerk.
365 tiems bettah den ur 5th annibersary.
.
Hey, iz teh onwee positive fing I cud fink ov.
*snerk*
Gud try, Romeow. U gets A foar effurt.
Does I has to update my address book now to say “Rameow”?
Or is it Romaow?
Romeaw?
Aromeow?
rhsb
.
ai spect dis will, nawt long frum nao, beh da bestest annibersary prezunt dat he eber gibded yew.
.
Nawt much consolation nao, butt (hehehe) sewn.
Fanks, BDM.
Sum dayz iz gud. Uthur dayz iz nawt so gud.
I fro up frum teh e-mayo.
i see deh trane a-kumming
itz rolling down deh trak……
Oh JC is teh WIN.
Kitteh in blak.
Iz keeps a cloes wach awn dis hart ob mine.
Iz keeps mai ais waide open awl teh tiem.
Iz keeps teh ends owt fur teh tie dat binds.
Becuz yur mine, Iz walks teh line.
Iz findz it berry,berry easy to be troo.
I find maiself alone when each day is frew.
Yus, I’ll admit dat I’z a fool fur yew.
Becuz yur mine, Iz walks teh line.
As shur as nite is dark an dai is lite.
Iz keeps yew awn mai mind both dai an nite.
An happiness I’ve known proves dat it’s right
Becuz yur mine, Iz walks teh line.
Yew’s gots a way tew keeps mii on your side.
Yew gibs mii cause fur lub dat I’z can’t hide.
Fur yew I’s knows I’s eben trai tew turn teh tide.
Becuz yur mine, Iz walks teh line.
I love this one.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmVAWKfJ4Go
Iz lubs dat wun tew! Iz wun ob mai faborit songs!
Iz won’t go borkin yur hart!
I dun eben get fabrik sofner?
Fur a sawfter landing.
Next tiem, Tuxie, ask Wallace & Gromit iffs u can go wif dem.
Den u won’t fro up awl ober ur gud clothes.
Well, I was drunk the day my Mom got outta prison.
And I went to pick her up in the rain.
But, before I could get to the station in my pickup truck
She got runned over by a damned old train.
And I’ll hang around as long as you will let me
And I never minded standin’ in the rain. No,
You don’t have to call me darlin’…darlin’
You never even call me
Well, I wonder why you don’t call me
Why don’t you ever call me by my name?
LOL! I lubs dat song!
Didjoo see ware I singged to Maus awn himz birfday 2day?
Last night I got served a little too much of that poison baby
Last night I did things I’m not proud of
And I got a little crazy
Last night I met a guy on the dance floor
And I let him call me baby
And I don’t even know his last name
Oh, my mama would be so ashamed
It started off “Hey cutie, where ya from?”
And then it turned into
“Oh no, what have I done?”
And I don’t even know his last name
Ai nawt see that. Ai had a bussee tudai. Which lol?
It wud be teh 9:00 a.m. lol foar me, so teh 7:00 a.m. wun foar u?
Preacher man talkin’ on the TV,
He’s a-puttin’ down the rock ‘n’ roll.
He wants me to send a donation,’Cos he’s worried about my soul.
He said: “Jesus walked on the water,”And I know that is true,
But sometimes I think that preacher man,
Would like to do a little walkin’, too.
But I ain’t askin’ nobody for nothin’,
If I can’t get it on my own.
You don’t like the way I’m livin’,
You just leave this long-haired country boy alone.
ohai rhsb is Uz still waring deh blonde wig?
Nawt enny moar, but I still gots awn teh dress.
Luuk gud awn me?
Berre flatturing
Fankyoo.
I jes gotta watch owt foar ayre vents, ya kno?
did U has more fun as a blonde?
Eh, nawt relee.
I wuz blond bebbeh. Den teh hares gotted redder az I gotted oldur.
I purrfurr bein redhed ennyway.
matched Ur temperz?
is jus kidding
:ducks
Yesh an no.
It takes alot foar me to gets mad, but wunse I gets mad, LUUK OWT!
I iz like dat too
Speshulee ifn u makes me mad enuf to cry.
Den u bettur sleeps wif wun eie open foar a whiel.
mah pointeh endz, let me show U dem
Anom.
Yus anom tew dat
Ohai, Taya!
Has wii met? If nawt, I’m rhsb.
**extends floofy paw in frenship**
Nyse to meetcha! Welcome to cheezland!
ohai rhsb
Wii has nawt met befoar nao. Iz naise to meet yew tew.
*extends sleek black paw*
anom, rhsb eben us bawttel reds hab teh tempurrrrs!
Otai bai red headed gurrl who wuz once blonde
Iz ar gonna sleep
Good nite
Nite, 2_k.
*facepaw* dat’s becuz its /nawt/ spaes masheen….hao manee tiems doo ai has to tell yoo?
I am a man of constant sorrow
I’ve seen trouble all my days
I bid farewell to old Kentucky
The state where I was borned and raised
For six long years I’ve been in trouble
No pleasure here on earth I find
For in this world I’m bound to ramble
I have no friends to help me now
It’s fare thee well my own true lover
I never expect to see you again
For I’m bound to ride that northern railroad
Perhaps I’ll die upon this train
You can bury me in some deep valley
For many years where I may lay
Then you may learn to love another
While I am sleeping in my grave
It’s fare you well to a native country
The places I have loved so well
For I have seen all kinds of trouble
In this cruel world, no tongue can tell
Maybe your friends think I’m just a stranger
My face you’ll never see no more
But there is one promise that is given
I’ll meet you on God’s golden shore
Um, whut does this haf to do with the picture?
kitteh barf in-ee-weigh donnot need drier fur dat!
Mai barfs let me show u dem
pour puddy get lite head.
**Walks arown Cheezland. It luuks lyk eberywun has either goned to bed oar iz utherwyze bizee.**
Ai iz still heer
*snuggles close to Rhsb*
Ohai, Sweetpea!
I nawt goin ennyware NEER dat mess!
Crowds an me nawt get along.
U go has teh fun!
well, we can jest crash at LCB’s place, sort 0 dress rehearsul fr win we crash annipuss’s place fr teh 2011 Lolympiks in Lunnon.
I hopes hur gots BEEEG cowch!
So Taya, tells me abowt urself.
Ware u libs?
Duz u werk, lib at hoam, go to skool, etc?
Wut u want ur cheezfrenz to kno abowt u?
U gots kittehs?
Lessee
Ai libs in Canada. Ai libs in my own appartment. Ai iz lukin fur a job. Ai has wun kitteh. Her name Yoru. She black kitteh. If yew goes tew mai page an clik awn mai pics an mai lols dere iz a picshur ob her.
**goes an luuks at kitteh pikshurs**
Ooooh! Hur is purty! Hao u get teh nayme Yoru?
I hadda kitteh, but hur crossed teh bridj in May. If u luuk at my pikshurs, hur iz teh beeg wun dats mostlee whyte wif caliko tayle an spots awn hur hed an bak. Hur name wuz Josie. I had hur 13+ yeers an it borked my hart hard to lose hur.
I libs in Kentucky, USA, currentlee wif teh parental yoonits. My huzbin an I iz gettin diborsed so I hadta moov bak wif dem foar a whiel. Nawt fun wen u gettin reddy to turn 42.
Red, it bees HI thyme yoo gotted anuvver kitteh!!! Yoo tell teh PY’s ai sedded so!
Yeah, I kin see it nao….
.
.
“Mahm, dad….my imajinaree frenz sez iz HI tiem I get anudder kitteh!
.
.
“Wate, why you callin teh mens wif teh whyte cotes?”
*pinches selb* Hay! Ai iz NAWT teh imajinaree!!!!!
Ai naem her Yoru cuz it short fur Yoruyonaka witch meeen Midnight in Japaneeze. Yoru awlso meen Night in Japaneeze bai isself.
Whar yoo libs in Kananandia? (Ai’s too lazee to go luk!) Ai libs neer Oddawa.
Ai libs in Newmarkit
I nawt haz right stuff
Doan feel sew bad. I nawt hazzit ethur.
teh troof iz awftenn eeted bai sumptin…
Anom tew dat!
Frenz, I gotta go to bed an try to get sum sleeps.
Wurk nawt lyk it wen I fall asleep onna desk! Wunner why…
Gud nite/day/wutebber!
Nite-nite, Red! Sweet dreems.
yur lint kacher needs emptyin an is mad
Look lyke barf reely Bhind yoo N peekchure!
~ Ew. ~
Ladeez adn Gennelmens adn ebbereebuddy eylse ov Cheez Laynde:
Presehntyng teh Akshual Reel HAL !!!!!!
I can’t help it. I cannot bear to see critters in clothes
dryers. My sister accidentally lost a kitten that way
many years ago. (you do the math). Call me a troll or a nuffer
or whatever, but I have to say this. Children who visit this web
site may not know how dangerous this is. And there have been
lots of LOLs with our furry friends in dryers. It tightens my
stomach every time I see one. ~sigh~
Thank you for the laugh!!
thats really funny!!!!!! but nasty at the same time!!!!!!!!!!!
lol he is liek omg im ma face is all shrewd uppa oofmg
this is so funny. probably the only funny one on the website