milk pleaz

milk pleaz shaken, not sturred
picture: Cindi with kitteh Coco. lol caption:
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milk pleaz shaken, not sturred
picture: Cindi with kitteh Coco. lol caption:
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.

anna cukkee!
conga cats shoe lay shuns ambercat! wud u liek a choklit martoonee, shaykn?
smart kitteh >^..^<
Teh name is Bond, Mittens Bond.
Win!!
epic win =^_^=
Dappurrrr kitteh iz dappurrrrr.
elegunn kitteh iz elegunn!
and has that wait-kitteh baffed and brot to my ruum.
noes! he will b brot to mah room! D:<
Wut??? no ref tu Pussy Galore??
oh cween! U made me LOL!!!!!!!!
@@@@@@@@@@@@@
but menshuning teh PG, no, taint propurr.
Dere’s dat werd agin!
I had to mufflol a laff at werk 2day. I had Nickelback blarin in my hedfones an had to leev my desk foar sumfin.
I remooved teh hedfones an herd a co-werker sayin, “It jest aint rite” but hur wuz sayin it sew kwiklee, I cudda SWORE I herd teh t-werd!
Yah, I kin see tryin to ’splain DAT wun!
lolz!
ah well, Iz off to eet dinners.
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If anyone seez Janet, I mented to tell her tehre’s a speshul starting tonite, on PBS, about India! I bet she’d enjoi it.
Mebbe PG iz at teh Faire?
But tehn, ifn DAT kind of Faire, mebbe nawt PG.
Moar lyk R, oar X.
winn!
Mai werk heer iz dun!!
teeheehee *blush*
whut wud M fink??
agent kitteh-007 kinda elegant!
nya nya~
I iz a Meezer kitteh- nawt a-Mused kitteh.
Meezer kitteh habs Sealed hims Poynt.
!
*golf clap*
Jefro! Go gits sum ob dem golf aiggs fur ur granny. She wunts to maik sum scambloled aigs.
Dis I gotta sea.
sowndz paynefull tu yuor mashie adn yuor niblick!
Mebbe is Chippendales kitteh?
U can leeb ur hat on.
I lubs dat song!
Has u seen teh moovie “The Full Monty”? If nawt, I highlee suggest u watch it. Iz teh funnee.
There beh a professor at da school that maded fun ub that moobie… he kinna had tew, doh, since his name was…
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MONTE BUTTE
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(and no, ai am NAWT kidding yew!)
*snurt*
*snerk*
Wehn Ai wuz in teh ohai skool tehre wuz a teecher naemed Mrs. Butts. Roomur hadz it tath hur huzbinz naem wuz Harry. Prolly nawt troo (whoo wuld b taht crool 2 naem tehir sun that?) butt (hee hee) it gaev us teh lolz.
Prolly teh saem stoopy parents dat named teh kid adolf hitler.
woould yew buhleeve Schickelgruber?
Ai gnu sumwun whoz parents naemed him Richard… which wud nawt be bad, egg-septing da “last” naem was Head. An tew make matters wurser, he insisted awn da “nick name” fur Richard… yew noes da wun ai mean… started wif a D.
ai hadda teecher who wud cawl awl teh bois Master so n so…..
yew kin onleeee imagine wut one ob teh bois las nayme wuz……..
Dats as bad as Miss Take…
Wii had teh Bates bruvvers att owr skuul, tu. Anna teechur wut musta bean rilaytid tu yurs.
snurt
Prolly the same parent who cawled der kitlets Cam Shaft, Shawn Brightly, or, *taadaa* how about the Wire twins? Barb and Bob (call me Robert!) Harry Butt fitz rite in.
I noo a gui named Rick Shaw.
Tho fur sum reesin he prfurrd tu b kawld Dick.
I knew of a man who, wen uzin himz inishuls, had teh following name:
I. P. Rainwater
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.
.
Srsly.
Dunno ennywun naymed Harry Butts, but ai did noe a Harry Beard.
An in college dere wuz a gurl hooz naem wuz Catherine Butts an hooz sorority sisterz called her “Kitty”…
Oar da girl whose last naem was Sheets…
Well (sorry ai seem to be monop… mop… takin moer dan mai share uv space rite naow) ai rilly did know a “Cookie Sheets” back hoem in WV.
Dat wuz her marryed naem, tho, so dunno if it still countz.
when ai wuz at Hazelden, tehr wuz a cownseller name ob “Mark Sheets” , an sumwun new thot hiz offis wuz whair she needed to fill owt her papperwerk
Hello? Has ennywun seed a commint dat got losted?
.
Ai wuz goin to add dat dis grate state ub Virginny had fodder an son polly tishuns named Harry Byrd. Ai allus wunderded wut a hairy bird wood look liek.
*kleens up werk puter keebord frum spittin jenerik diet kola all obber*
ow
! sum went up mai noze!
Bond kitteh habs starred in:
U Onwee Lib Nine Tiems
Teh Kitteh wif teh Golden Nip
Live and Let Lie.
Octohyoomin.
Teh Spy Who Rubbed Meh.
Teh Spy Who Lol’d Me!
ding ding ding!!!FTW!
Doomraker
Oops…
Doom-maker
litter-raker?
Dr. Nom
Win!!!
Gold Pointee Ends
Hairbls
Octopussy
A View to a Baff.
die mond shapez treetz ar fur eber
Fur Ur Noms Onwee.
goldeneye….it glows in teh dark!!
Neber sez neber agin……
an I poops in ur shooz!!
Oar wus it ur boot?
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On cweenmj’s sikrit serbis.
A Quantum ob Shoelace
From Russian Blue wif Luv?
Gud wun, 2minions!
Fang queue, rhsb! Ai can only lurks at stoopy werk, so ai didnt get to cheer yu on today, but yu go, grrrl – kik buttz an taek names, an frow teh lolyers at teh STBX!
Dr. Nom-nom-nom
Naow Ai needs to go an find mah CD uf Bond themes so Ai can look for teh movies that still haf no kitteh-analog.
dis beez a berry ham sum kitteh.
Kitteh would lubs to has some ham, thx!
Heer iz sum ham an itz nout eben green!
wif cramberrees & dwessing?
cram berrie an drezzin? Wad du yu think dis iz tur kee…. No no no
wid da ham, yu eats sweet taters an grein been cats eroll
I thot that ham went wif burgers.
onlee in da germ enny
And Canukistan bacon goes wif eggs benedickt.
wich iz teh nommiest ^_^
u wantz friez wif dat burger?
It’ll cost ur extra fur a shake.
wud yu lyk to sooper siz yur order? Onlee elebentee mor centz
U gots to gets a shake to dip teh fries in!
Ew… but mai dodder doez dat wf da Frostee frum Wennys..crazee kidz
Plasticat duz dat tew!!
Oh…ai jest no ticed dat cat mus iz ober ‘caz yur dec ora shuns are gone.
Yeah, it was getting too hot under all those lites. That and it was Elebentieth Nite yesterday.
Now I just need to make sure my phlonquais puts teh lites away neatly this time so they won’t get all tangloled again next year.
ah, teh best ting in da wurld iz teh fries in da shake….my faveorite combo of da food….better then the cheez+burger…:)
Vanillol Shaek + Fries = WIN
Cheez iz eggstra tu.
Nawteh kitteh willz pay eggstruh too watch u shake.
Shake well before using.
Nawt tu shake teh kitteh. teh pointee endz will be deployed.
Dat’s gween been Hotdish, iffs ur frum Minnesnowta.
minnie soda…dats ware alla lufer in laydies mayke da church suppers ina church baise ment. Rite? Da o fish al symblol of the church lay dies isaza catser ol dish.
Dat oar teh free beanz saladz adn teh gween jello wif froot oar cocomunuts innit.
Doan furgets teh fried onyons frum a can, on tops ov teh gween beens.
oooo
i lubs dem
i sneeks dem furr snakkies ebben dough dey furr teh greeny beens
*gives donkey a hole can of fried onyons all for her ownself, none for teh grean beens*
I lubs u, lcb.
wait, wutt? Is a hole can teh kind dat has a hole in it an all
teh ringees dun escaped?
*opens can and looks*
*sighs wiff a happy*
*noms teh rings*
wait…wares MY ring?
U nawt marryin GP, so u no can has ring.
Him spended awl hims munnies
buying cracker jacks forbying LCB’s ring.I can has update???
Didjoo nawt kno dat LCB an GP iz gettin teh marryed? Yup, awn Janyooaree 21st.
Nawt menshun it to GP, tho. Himz got a seryus case of teh cold feets an iz in De Nile.
She giveded yew a ring but yew eeted it?
GPz wedding annowncmint adn uzzer silleenessez:
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http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/2009/01/01/funny-pictures-kitteh-is-callin-u-at-2-am/#comment-548047
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http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/2009/01/01/funny-pictures-bein-ur-excuse/#comment-548302
*sigh*
Dats wutt I get furr not bein heer enuff.
prolly cuz I has mah OWN little Lub……
/yah, he’s on here
//laffs maniacclee an runns off
I hassa jellus.
I no has a liddlol lub….oar a beeg lub, foar dat mattur.
**snifs**
Nobodee lubs me.
**goes to luuk foar werms**
But But U haz lucky.
Yeah, well…
Lucky is fun, but prolly nawt gud foar the lawng-haul, kwim?
*sniff* *sniff* *whimper*
…
Mah prezzie izzint teh purrrrrrfekt aftur awl?
…
*runsaway cryin*
**runs aftur NS**
Nononono!! Come bak!
*pawses*
…
*luks ober hur shoulder*
…
*narrows hur eyez at rhsb*
…
…
*runsaway wif a happee to haz dinnur wif teh huzbin*
rhsb say “Nobodee lubs me.”
I r saying Aidawntfinkso!! Nonononononono! I lubs u and all de Cheezfrens lub u. U r well-lubbed!
gween jell oh wif cottaje cheez an pares!
life time minnee sodan heer , haff norweejan, haff lootheran, have relatiffs that talk lik teh peeps in fargo.
Donut forgitz teh kawfee pot – 2nd mos impurtant lick-quid after teh comunionion whine. H2O onlee impurtant caus u needing it 2 maek teh kawfee.
*sy* yesh. An “hawtdish” beh dah bernakular fur “cassarole”, aldo doze Luteran ladees wall whop yew upside da head wif dem canes (or shubbles, as da case may beh) iffn dey hears meh say dat tew lowdlee.
An applolsoss! Wif teh ham, ai meenz.
I thot applolsoss went wif pork chops.
Teh warm applolsaus wif teh sin amomnon is gud wif NE fuds. Bestest is teh warm pear haf wif teh brandee flambeau.
Nebber had teh warm pear wif teh brandee flambeau.
Sowndz gud, tho!
bestest fing…if U nawt duz it right teh fyremans will cum visit U.
Applolsoss go wicf whateber u r eating. Nomnomnomnom…
Yu can rly eats teh cranberries wif ham! We eated dem dis Krissmaus – glaze on teh ham maded wif cranberries nawt rasins. Wuz surprisely nommy.
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An my momcat maded green beens hotdish fur nawt-sekund tiem eber. All us kidcats had big happitayls; we liek green beens cats eroll, but onliest has at frends howses before.
If James Bond looked like a kitty, he would look just like this one!!
formally attired kitteh is formal.
Ohai PDB
ohai !!
that’s a beautiful avatar
ThanKyou
how’ve you been; habn’t seen you around so much lately.
of course, ai’ve been busy too, and not around much either.
I have been VERY. VERY. lazy.
I needs a hoofin.
Tanks fur askin. ♥
*hoofs teh dawnkee wif an extreem liteness, coz she deserves a lazee wonse in a wile*
dat wut we calls a ‘love hoofin’, k?
awwwwwww………….
dat wur soooo sweet!!!♥
Oh what a shame!
I’ve just missed M’sieur d’Beaker, it seems.
And on a lol just made for espionage….
.
*pockets a mysterious envelope*
*silently steps out of the shadows*
Well, since M’sieu isn’t here, p’rhaps *I* can make your delivery for you?
Satisfaction guaranteed. Quickly, quietly – discretion assured.
*slides a dagger into her boot and limbers her fingers for her patented “sleepers pinch”*
I do so prefer to leave no mess… and nothing for witnesses to witness.
*kumz running up tu deh Dawnkee*
sry bowt dat.
*Skiddingz tu a stop adn bumpz deh Dawnkee intu Pd’B
*knokking himz beeker over!!!
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Oh Hai!
well, hello, dere, u.
I had a video I wanted to show you…. but now I has to find it….it involved
a collossal watur balloon….snurt
Dat’s Mr. Kitteh to u.
or Sir Kitteh.
or His Esteeemed Exhaltedness, Lord Kitteh.
or …
Iz purrfectly groomed fur teh GP wedding, yes?
Signed Sealed delivered…hims Urs.
here i am baby!!!!
hai, jamammamamama!!! how b deh mama kitty? gibb hur a liddlol hed bonk and a tummy rub fur mii.
her is gettin beddar slowleee. ….. . but her purr motor is werkin agin!!!
YAYZ!!!!!
Dat b great newz!!!!! A fully funkshuning purr motor b a very gud sine.
oh an eben beddar………….her jus ate liddol bits ob chicken frum mai finners!!!
*hi-paws Jamama!*
I doesn’t want to rain on ur parade, jamamamamakitty, but u mite wanna count ur finners. U knoes, just to make sure.
hmmmm, lesseeeeee
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wun
twew
elebenteeeee
sebben
yep……….awl dare
walks aweigh wisstlin
*oh wen teh saints…….go marchin innnnnnnnnnnnnnnn*
Chikken finnerz….mmmmmmmmmmmm
Hoorah!! CeilingCat be listening Aifinkso!
U meens we gotta DRESS UP foar teh wedding?
Dagnabitt. Nao I gotsta go find sumfin to ware…
that means U hasta shawp!
But I nawt lyk shawpin!
Yesh, I iz woman an I nawt lyk shawpin.
I loathe shoppink.
Me free I no likes shoppin fur clothses
I iz an effishunt shawper
I nawt likes to wander aimlessly
I only goes shawping when I need sumfing
I makes a list like a grocery list
and den tries out stuffz
and den buyz it
and crosses stuffz from mah listz
Ai noe lieks shoppin fur clothses, pursez oar shooz. Pleh! Ai lieks makin listz, tho…crossing fings off ov tehm feelz sew gud!
an I knoz how mush U lubs dat!
**pulls 2_k’s tayle an runs, hidin behind WRr**
Ai shaer mai eerwurm wif U awl.
♪ ♫
I was sleeping and right in the middle of a good dream
Like all at once I wake up from something that keeps knocking at my brain
Before I go insane I hold my pillow to my head
And spring up in my bed screaming out the words I dread
I think I love you
AAaack!
I jest heerd dat awn commershul!
I wuz singin Tod Rundgren awn previus thred.
:butt wiglol of doom
jumps on rhsb
and den runs in deh odder direckshunz
David Cat-city!
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I hab an earwurm frum a video I maed ov a shelter bebeh.
Is teh one at teh top ov mah page
http://www.colleenscakerie.com/shelter.html
cub bee wurse
I’ve had “Can’t smilol wifouf u” eerwurm
since watching Hellboy II
Wehn Ai hadz teh brayne anoorism, fur daze Ai had teh eerwurm ov teh ant wif teh rubbur tree plant. Stranje.
ooohhh! such kyootiees!
I wish I could take them all home.
**sadtayle**
Mii 2. Dey r awl sew sweet.
Depends who side ob teh chapel u sits awn.
Wut side let me ware teh less-formal stuffs?
U has tu aks LCB oar GP. Ai forgetted.
TTFN cheez frenz…ai ar on call to nite. Tom orro iz da 3Kingz Day. We getz mor prezzies!!!! ana spe shul caek wid monee init.
dere’s a speshul caek wid MONEE init????
How good can it getz?
*faynts at teh thot*
Wait, whut? U makes *pie* wif dough, not caek!
mmmmmm
piiiiiiiiiiiii…..
U gets awl happeh bout 3.14?
Wat’s so grate bout March 14th?
Is free dais too early fur teh Gween Dai.
That be PI Day.
.
March 14, at 1:59 is PI Day and Time!
.
since PI ez approximately…
.
3.14156
but of corse!
u is teh brillyant, BDM!!
Ifinkso we may has to be a speshul partee for that…
wethereor
behavesowree mah finners gabe yr finners da stoopy germs.
.
Yesh, wii wall haz tew haz partee awn PI dai!
Maf humor: Fwends dont let fwends drink and derive.
3.14159 (stoopy finners!!)
Not DAT pi, silleh!
*hoof flop*
U ebbur smell dat men’s cololgne, Pi?
It r too die furr.
*flops ob bur*
A gui I usta werk wif yeers ago wore Drakkar Noir.
I usta make up egg-skyooses to walk by him so I cud gets a snif!
Kanon wuz teh wun taht gawt mii. Oh….nd fur tohse hoo bemembur wae bak wehn, Hawaiian Surf!
Nawt tu tell LCB oar teh caek be borrowed
I didn’t kno dat caek cud gets enny bettah,
butts, caek wif a monies?
I wanna BEEG peece!
Ai iz nawt reel! (luk at lass thred, towardz botum) Ai iz akshully a figmint ob Plasticat’s ‘majination!
Nawt reel??? How kin u saying dat??? wii iz awl reel!!
*reechez intu deh innertuubz adn deh hand kumz owt tuther end
*feelz rownd blindly and grabbingz sumwun bai deh hand.
.
Hai dere!! Iz u reel? u feelz reel.
I feel fur u,
I fink I lub u…
I lubz u tu, man!!!
OOooohhh!!! I knoes it!
Roofus an Shokka Conn!
Cweenee yuu iz teh onlee wun aside frum Mii nda Uniquekitty dat Dekk Rant iz meh “Alternate Personalitee”, huu, Ai mite add, wont eggzist suun sins teh emayo address yoosed fur himz profile nda abbitar iz suun gonna bii gawn. Dat waz meh hann yoo grabbed meh cween, nawt DR’s! Sillee Cween!
Oh, Dekk! u goez away?? furebber?? *wipez tear frum cheek*
It b so hard wen u haz tu szying gud by tu deh secrit agentz….
akshullee cween Dekk waz a pilot in a rebellyun in anudder galaxee, klowss enuff tho. Dekk Rant izza karakteur inna storee Ai bii ritin kawled: Tuousrol-Voan (purrnownsed 2-Ah-s-rall-Vown).Iz reelee bowt peepz inna nudder galaxee fitin gainst ebil robots. Iz gud so far, oar at least it waz lass tyem Ai saw eet……
Butt (hehehe) yew be Dekk Rant… leest yr naem sez yew are
noe Ai iz Plasticat!
is dat a jinglee bell on himz collur?
OH HOOMIN……*jingle jingle*
I AM IN NEEDZ OF SUMPIN………..
plz to gib me sumpin…….a skritch an melk an t000na….NAO!!!!!
Mai kitteh used tu nawt mind teh collors. Nawt liek teh bells. Wuld scratch teh jinglol bob outta teh bells so she culd sneeks up awn teh mauses.
Smart kitteh, nawt wantin to let mauses kno himz comin.
Him da HANDSUM!
and prolly and handful, too
Hay, lookit my boots! **shows awf beeg boots wif rusty spikes stikkin outta teh toes**
Maus gibbed ‘em to me erlyur 2day. I added teh spikes.
I iz awl reddy to do sum huzbin-butt-kikkin!
(I iz meetin my lolyer 2morrow, to discuss wevver I will acksept hiz offur oar gibs the go-ahed to start isshooin subpoenas foar himz finanshul rekkords.)
{{{{rhsb}}}}}}
sumdai, a wurthy man will finds u. I looks forwurd too dat day.
Den, maybe, just maybe, u will hab teh time to mess wiff him. Hope you will not
be too bizzy an overlook him. *smilelol*
Aaawwww, fanks Kafleen.
I luuks foar-wurd to dat day, too.
**whispurrs**
U finkso if I’m bizzee when him shows up, him mite grab me an say, “HEY! I’M HEER!”
{{{Kafleen}}}
I looks forwurd too dat day too, rhsb. I uks forwurd to can has a BIG happy for u den! *blows nose in tishue and sighs wif Kitteh-bliss*
*sigh*
Ai wuz sposta be outta heer 45 minnitz ago — but ai still haz lawtz uv werks dat needs to be dun.
…
*whimper*
…
Aiz nawt gonna get to swim my laps tonite.
I feels ur payne, NS.
I werked an hower late 2day, an nawt getted as musch dun as I wanted to.
stoopy work.
Duz it needs a hoofin?
Aye! Abowt to start teh last part … dis kud be dun in 45 minnitz … or it kud taek a cuppul howrs. Aiz hope hope hopin fur teh shorter wun.
…
Happitayl Gnu Yeer, Kafleen! Hao yew iz?
Woot – it wuz abowt 45 minnitz. Nao ai iz jus maykin elebenty copies — but teh masheen iz doin dat part.
Ai gets to go hoam!!!
Eeben beddur — mah huzbin iz gonna meet meh at a yummy peetsa restaurant neer hoam. Sew ai getz to haz a dinnur dayte!
…
Gud nite, Cheezpeeps!
G’nite, NS!! Schmooz!!!
Oh – and it’s stupid cold in here. My fingers are going to turn blue, which might match the blanket I’ve had on my lap all day.
…
*taeks a deep clenzin breff*
omg! i lurves dis gorjus gai!!!
Hizza sophisticat…… berry smoove
soffistikat?
hm. memmind meh dat song: ever buddy wanna bee a kat!
yah…
*sigh*
Becuz teh katz teh onlee kat dat noez where itz at.
All of these comments (not to mention about 19 other captions for the picture), and not ONE person has said “Shaken, not purred”. I am losing faith in the ability of the public to make criminally horrible jokes!
Wii were sabing dat awner fer yew!
we noo dat u wur wunting to say it so we wur waiting.
Took u long enuff!
Dis hand sum boy is from OZ. His name is Coco. He owns two hoomans in Sydney Australia. Jest thot he shud be reckog… reccogn…named.
U noez him???!?!?!?!?!? U shud klikking on deh “Incorrect credit or offensive?” thingee under deh picture and telling deh Cheezez hoo he b adn hoo took deh pitcher soez deh kin gitting deh kreditz. Adn hi iz a hanzum boi…….
“Hi iz! Hurrah fur da hanzum boi,
Cuz it iz, it iz a gloriuss fing
To be a hanzum boi!”
Frenz, aifinkso iz tiem foar me to goes to beds.
Teh wevvers inna moarnin may be teh nastee, so I mite hasta leeb erlee. Pleh.
Hazza gud nite/day/watebber!
**Schmoos to awl**
Nite-nite, rhsb! Donut forget to taek ur boots off befoar yoo getting into bed!
WIN!!!!
Pusii Galoar!
Lmao james bond
ok let it b shaykn! *tayks glas of milk n swirls it round* ere ya go!