teh rulz: 1-all kitteh toyz r mine

teh rulz: 1-all kitteh toyz r mine 2-evryting else mine too
nd u cant haz a turn wif dem either.
picture: Metro Newspaper. lol caption: kimkey
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teh rulz: 1-all kitteh toyz r mine 2-evryting else mine too
nd u cant haz a turn wif dem either.
picture: Metro Newspaper. lol caption: kimkey
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.

An ai’ll get dem
Iffn dey fit throo teh catflap
Looky yuu!!! Conga rats agin, annipuss fur da top ub da thred!! Still want sum hot buttered rum fur tu helps yu sleeps an keeps yu da warm?
FangQ, kk4. Ai aer juss abowt reddy fur bed, so Ai’d prefurr sum hawt choklit wiv juss a teenie splash uv rum thx.
Aifinks dat da best ub bof worlds!! *hands annipuss hot chokklit hot frum da stove, not instant, but wif milk an nestles..stir stir, watch watch, stir stir…pours littlol splash ub rum in teacup fur da sleeps*
FangQ dat sownds berry tasty an nootrishus!
Yu mostest welkum, annipuss!! Ai noe iz tastee, an ai shur dat der is sum nutrishun in der…sumware!!!
Ub cors iz nutrishuz. haz da theobrominz. Iz e sent shul tu mai diet
Is that my TTI cuzzin cat burglar whut was in teh nooz?
Yep, Dat’s Frankie!
Dey haz fownd teh cat hoo Frankie “borroed” teh toiz frum an gibben dem bakk.
I hadn’t herd uv him b4. Heer he iz:
.
dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1093194/Frankie-feline-exposed-cat-burglar-stealing-toys-neighbours-homes.html?ITO=1490
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Ambercat postid a nupdayt awn teh cheezfrenz site 2dai – him wuz in teh papur agane `coz dey haz fownd ware him wuz steelin teh toiz.
I Lolled !!!
But whutr a gorjuss kitteh!
oh. I see I still hab Festib Fern Abatar. I changed it back to Hazelface earlier.
Stoopy W.P. Xmas is gorn!
Not fer us. Wii ar still waytin fer awl tu bii helfy tu sillybrayte.
{{{{{{{Lindykat an Hubcat}}}}}}}}}
Plz to awl get bedders, an enjoi yor extended Chrissmuss.
Awl in teh howse of Tidmum continue tu hav a wondermus hollydai sillybrayshun. Enjoi yoor cheezmeet, an giv hugs tu owr cheezfren fer mii, oteh?
Fankyew. I picks up Yvi in teh mornin frum Ambercats howse.
Den Ifinkso we can has shoppinks? an Fun an come back to to H.O.T an has niec noms an visit an I has a eggcited
I will gib hugs an gud wishes frum yoo .
O hai, lindykat!
I is teh sry to hear that not all is well chez vous. Hope it’s nothing extry serious?
*hugs to lindycat, who sended me a lol that made me feel betterer when I was teh not well*
I imagine that now there will be a ginormous lawrsoot. Mabye we can bring back Jonny Cockran from teh dead again?
*rummages thru wallet an bank statements* Aifinks if der nuff monees, he comes bak frum beyond tu help.
how will we tell the difference?
LoL, I got maiself a “Spook-alike”!
Iz little kitteh (named Spookie) ob 7 mons that looks and akts totally like Frankie
Iz littlol BC?
BC? :$
a BC? :$
Basement Cat!
oops.. snort of new heer.. aplologies !
yez, she iz a littlol BC
ai fot Burglar Cat!
…but nawt teh gushifudz. Thoaz ar myne. PERIYUD.
ohai LCB! ai has mizzed yew! ai fink wun ub yr lites be owt-*BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!* nebber mind, iz ok like it iz…
Is ok. I stokked up on replacerment blubs yesterday.
Gonna keep teh lites on until Elebentieth Nite.
ummmm, LCB, how’z bidness? you hirin?
*kk4 slips in, steels resume* Hire meh!!!
Plz to form a orderly queueueue.
Has ur resummays, photos and bribe moneys handy.
Sry… I not flexiblol enuf tu forming a “Q”…… iz ok if I formz a “I”?
How about a lowercase Greek letter xi?
I’ll give it a try…. stretch adn bend adn skwigglol adn bend…
How’z dis??
.
ξ
That’s vry gud!
Um, are u gonna be able to get out of that posishun or is we gonna need teh jaws of life?
Just a sec… lemmee straiyten up.
.
ζ
.
Uh-oh. I think sumfing got stukk.
dere iz awlsew a goggie hoo theefs! Hee steels frum teh stor:
http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_11309200
ooh annipuss — yurrr good!!! conga ratz!
FangQ, calicocoa!
wehn yu wehk upp, annipuss, ai’ll fikz yew a naice warm bukkit ov brekfis martoonyz adn sum dansin,wahtevr yew laik!
ohai! I liek ur name, calicocoa!
but ur bloo name duzznt go anywheres!
Do u has teh URL for ur ICHC profile in teh URI line when u posts?
ohai! adn fankz yew, leeza-b. yuo arr a verey naice kitteh foar telilng meh abuot teh ICHC probulm.
ai wyche ai undrstudd hao teu fikx itt — ai dawn’t eavn knao waht yeu meen bai “blooname” adn awl teh wurdz inn teh struxnz aer speld rong adn ai kant unrdstan afing. (halp — waht dez tihs meen: “First you take the URL and copy it to your document…” iz taht spozd teu maek senss?
i’m stil nawt a tekchy kitteh — beekaws ai gawt dropt awn mai hed awnto a cmpootr wehn ai wuz a litl kitteehh adn ai’m stlil frayda cmpootrz. reely frayd. reely reely frayd. splodyhed frayd.
mey cmpootr sumtyms getz mey naem rong tu, adn taht cnfoozs meh eben moar. sumtyms itz calicocoa adn sumtyms itz caliccocoa.
Hai!! Calicocoa!!! Mebbee I kin halping u??
I haz halperz at
cweenmj.wordpress.com/ichc-helperz/
.
It splainingz bowt deh blooness adn deh avatarz and lotz uv uzzer inneresting and useful stuffz…..
.
and it b splayned fur nawt tekkee peepz…..
Schmoooo.
Basement Cat claims dominyun obber awl da toys.
Congratulations on anudder nawt sekkund, annipuss!
FangQ, Fuzzybeard
annipuss haz teh qwickness! cong ratz tew yew! ai still has eggnog iffin yew like.
Sowwy, but eggnog iz pleh, aifink. U can haz mai shaer!
3 – ‘Cluding teh goggie’s toyz. *pore widdle goggie!*
3a unless dere’s goggie drool ondem. Den demand humman kleenz it off.
goggie drools….pleh!!! BC demand fur da cleenups ub da nastee goggie drool! Nawt gonna lik dat off da byootimus blak fur! Pleh.
*sneeks up behind KK4*
Schmooooh! (Ur under teh missile toe.)
Your puny offerings offend me, hooman…..
It’s Frankie!
http://www.swindonadvertiser.co.uk/search/3959554.Meet_Swindon_s_cat_burglar/
U can has whutebber I has finished shreddin.
And dat -mite- inclood U.
BC nawt takes enny prisnors, aifinkso! Him da cute, yesh?
from one chartur member of teh BC fan club to anotter… yes!
Ai jes wanna takes him home wif meh!! Him kin beh our mascot…cuz we nebber wuld be able tu decide wif awl ub ar BC’s dat we lubs. Wat kin weh name hims?
Acht tung bebbeh
Basement kitteh xtrordinaire
Cinder
Deth kitteh
Eyes ub gold…ai am sold
Frankenkitteh
G….
Grinchee kitteh
Heathern
Incarnate ob teh ebil
Jezeebel
K……
King Kat
Liber Nacht Kat
Midnight
Nightstalker
Oscuro
P…
Klepto-kitteh
Living-on-deh-edge kitteh
Mine, mine, awl mine
N….
Not yors
Orgamiced Crime Cat
Pinched all teh Preshusses
Q..
Quantico kitteh
Rool-less kitteh
Sole, urs is MINE kitteh
T…..
Toy taking Tom
Usurper of toys
Violently removing toys
W..
Waltzing Makillya
Very afraid, beh very afraid
Xtreme badness, ai gots it
Yo’…yu gotta problum heer?
Zyuu nebber ben afraid liek dis before
Only if mai toys be steeled!! Wahhhhhhhhhhhh!!
Ohai, tidmum!
Haz yoo had eeny moar mowses?
fern is still here… Hazrl shoud be bak. Do yoo fink Frankie steeled mah abatar?
Now i just have my qwilt. Whuts occurin? Wierdness. Thats whut.
EEEEp! Now festib fern is bak Grrrrrrrrrrr!!
Ohai rhsb,
Nope. No moar mowsies, ceptin teh gnu tois fer xmas mowsies. One ob tehm only haz 3 legs. It are differntly abled. Fits well in this howse
Ai sees yu wif hat on…den da one before ai seez green kwilt…
Ub corse dey awl yurs, sweet littlol Basement kitteh!! Yu deserb dem!
#4; und ifns youse tinks udderwise, youse r in fur majer surprize…
#5…Meet mai frenz, da pointy enz
**wishin I hads sum poynty ends rite nao**
Libbin inna cardbored bocks awn teh syde of teh innerstate iz luukin REEL gud rite nao.
Well, ai kin lend yu sum…let’s see, 6 kittehs, 4 pointy enz on each…*finks bak tu high skool maf* Um, eech kitteh gots four paws wif pointy enz…6 x 4 is 24… oh noes…um….*finks hard* so each kitteh hab four paws wif pointy enz…six kittehs at 4 each..iz 24 pointy enz fur yu?
Ifinkso u needs to multiply by anudder 4, KK.
1 kitteh = 4 feets x 4 legs = 16.
6 kittehs x 16 = 72.
Oar to luuk at it anuthur way:
4 feets per kitteh x 6 kittehs = 24 feets
24 feets x 4 poynty enz per leg = 72 poynty enz.
Like parrothead sed….*hed explodes wif numbers* Ahh, ahh, wat da @#@?
*kk4 lies alone an afrade in da dark, wif no frends tu halp hur* *twitches, needs meds ASAP*
**runs intew dark rum, runs intew cowch OWCH, feelz arown fer lyteswish, fines da lyteswish an turns lytes awn. OhaiKK4, we kin habz eggsplodid heds tugeddur. We nawt tawlk abowt nummers at awl. Here hab dis littlol medicine, um I meen dis littlol, um, tic tac!
*kk4 grabs tic tak wif a kwikness dat ebben startles hurself* Oh, sowee, parrothead, ai not meens tu scratch yu. *swallows tic tak dry* oh, yesh, um, yu made doze peenya cowladas yet, mai throat a littlol dry now!!
Well ah parent lee Leeza-B and Guiness Piggeh hab banned cocoumnutz frum Cheezland! Ai wuz jist makin synes fur my protest marsh. Ai kin awfur yew sum lyme dakurees, frozed. Wud dat wurk? Wanna help me make protest syns? Ai haz gliddur!
Oh, gawd…*kk4 grabs bottlol ub glitter, washes down pill* Oh luuk, wen ai burp, is like new yeers!! *burp…confetti….burp….confetti…*
*hi-paws KK*
fanks gf!!
Oh, yu sillee KK4 . da gldur iz fawr da sinez , nawat tu drink.əˇ˘˛˝˝̀̀́̃̉;΅·̣΄΅Hee! ai came bak just tu laf at yu.
*sobs in corner* Dats okai…y’all kin jes haul meh aroun tu da partees an puts meh in da corner…put a sine on mai hed dat sez confetti belches…10 cents a dans…is okai..*pitiful eyes*
***haul KK4 to dah nexd partee, sets her up in cornur, goez tew make
‘10 cents a dans, pay teh parrut’ sine, but haz no gliddur to make sine!! Uziz sharpy markur insted. Glews sine to kk4’s hed**
Eberywuns eies r bloo
An eberywuns mouf is dry…
**luks in boddlol tew see if rhsb bin intew dah tic tacs**
Nope, jes lissenin to Sixx AM iz awl.
Are yew pole dansin? Dat stoopy cococomnut hatun Guiness Piggeh neber eben did teh pole danse fur us, aftur he steeled my bideo, butt wut kin yew eggspekt frum a cococomnut hatur?
Reeleee, yew wood finkso LCB wood hab trayned dat piggeh bedder!
I nawt pole danse foar jes ennywun.
It hasta be rekwested an dun in teh privit.
U pole dansez in deh :shudder: PRIVY????
.
Ewww!! Ew!!! Ew!!!!!!!!!!
Nawt in teh privvy!
In PRIVIT!
Silleh cween.
Ohai agin rhsb! Aifoughtso yew wuz home aloan? Datz why ai aksed. Ai nose yew nebber pole danse in publik. Pub, mebbeh, but nebber lik.
cweenmj, ai nawt meen enee dis rah spek here, butt, yew hab pole in yer baffrum? **wunderz bowt privat habbitz ov royultee**
NOEZ!!! I thot rhsb hadded a pole in her baffruum…. I barelee haz ruum in mai baffruum.
Yew has rum in yer baffrum? Yew old enuff tew drink in publik, rite? Why yew hide in baffrum to hab rum?
*Rollz deh CCC intu deh dark ruum.
*Findz mergen sea flash lite adn turningz it on.
*rummij rummij
Wut wii got fur number indused hedakez??
Oh, i thinking tihs will halping….
.
*pore, pore,
*stir, stir
*mixy, mixy, mixy,
*porez konkok shun intu glassez.
*handz wun tu kk4 and wun tu PH
.
Bottumz up!!!!!!!!!!!
*gulp gulp gulp…* Oh, mai aifinks….*oh noes, da nummers!!* Ai bedder duz dis…*glug glug glug* Wheewww…ai still feels weak…*curls up in ball agin, but haz eyes open*
HAY she drinked my drink tew! An my gilddur! **powkes out bottom lip, um, bottum beek** Butt fanks fur finkin ov me, cweenmj! **wispers** dat wuz nawt herbicide, rite? RITE?
Noez, not Herb E Side.
.
I keepz tellingz mai huzbin “I cannot duing deh math in mai hed.”
Enneething byond 2 + 2 rekwirez papr adn penslolz.
Y he azking mii tu calkulate gaz milage wen I b driving down deh rode??? oar wut b deh bank balance now dat wii bawtted elebenty dollerz werf uv gas???
Mai huzbin sayz sillee fings lyke dat tew! Him wanted dah bank balunce aftur ai wint Krissmus shawppin! Lyke I subtracted deh stuff in dah czechbuk wyle standin in dah lyne! Stoopy huzbin! **wundurs if wood be impowlyte to ask cween tew make me anudder drink**
No prob…
,
*pore, pore,
*stir, stir
*mixy, mixy, mixy,
and an eggstraw dsah uv dis
adn a littlol bit uv dat…
*stir, stir
*porez konkokshun intu sparklee glass
*handz tu PH
Oh noes, parrothead!! *boldy asks cweenmj fur nudder drinkee* Ebbry stinkin day husbin asks meh wat bank balance is…gas…hims lunch frum 7-11…dis…dat…dis…dat…make me da crazee!! Ai tells him…jes keeps out so much munees wen yu puts yur check in da bank…oh, noes…dat tu much trubbels! *sighs, drinks, sits in chare*
ofankyew cween! Osparklee! **gulp gulp* WOW dat is deeleeshush! Dis iz seekrit resahpee? Mebbeh ai can lib teh rest ov mai hole lyfe wiffout peenya cowlawdas if can drink dese…. ponders….. (ohdotz)
I noez!! i use deh ATM card alla time…
Hoo keepz trak uv how much gitz spended??
I check balance on line……
.
Bankz math b bedder dan mine ennee day.
.
*gitz owt moar bottlolz
*pore, dash uv dis,
*stir, pore, stir, dash uv dat,
*mixy, mixy, pore, mixy,
.
adn a littlol bit uv ddis, tuu…
*stir, stir
*porez bubblolee konkokshun
*intu sparklee glass
*handz tu KK4, PH, adn keepz wun fur sef.
Cheez!!
.
**Klinkee glassus wif cween and KK4** Cheez! **wipes gliddur awf beek frum KK4 burps** Ocween, I duz dat tew! But I tenz tew charj fings den ryte wun czech, ai neber carreez a balunce, an still dah pleh huzbin wines, an wines. **wunders if huzbin fit in trashbin**
Fankees, cweenmj!! *drinks, sighs* Aifinks, parrothead, dat husbins kin fit nicely in da trash bins, in fact!! *pulls out clippyboard..duz figures..oh noes, maff!!*
Well, ai sure der is some way..ai shure bout dat!! Dey ruins ebbryfing wif der qweshuns!!!
Oh noes, ai still habs glittur fur yoo!! *burp* luuk at awl da glitter shimmerin round da room!
əˇ˘˛˝˝̀̀́̃̉;΅·̣΄΅əˇ˘˛˝˝̀̀́̃̉;΅·̣΄΅əˇ˘˛˝˝̀̀́̃̉;΅·̣΄΅əˇ˘˛˝˝̀̀́̃̉;΅·̣΄΅
əˇ˘˛˝˝̀̀́̃̉;΅·̣΄΅əˇ˘˛˝˝̀̀́̃̉;΅·̣΄΅əˇ˘˛˝˝̀̀́̃̉;΅·̣΄΅əˇ˘˛˝˝̀̀́̃̉;΅·̣΄΅
ooo datz sparkllleeee, gma!!!
U b reddy fur Noo Yeerz Eve!!!
**batz at glittur, triez tew ketch an put back in boddlol. Gibs up, ree zyns self tew nawt habbin glitturee signs. Wunders if dere iz enee DK scales still layin arownd**
heer, parrot -
*hands ober seberal an numeruss bottlols ob glitturs*
*leens bakk an enjoys teh lubblee glitter belchin ob kk24*
ai can has sum of cweens drinkee??
ai haz bin teh livin in teh box root= nawt all iz cracked up tewbe! srsly, berry soon awlwillchange, so hang on with all 72 poyntees, an change will happin!
yer furgettin the teefeses
Teh doo claw don’t cownt?
I has bin skewered by them, too…
That makes 18 claws per kitteh…
hay rhsb. R u shure u shud be living inna cardbored box wif all those pointy ends?
Yew jist habs tew aig dem awn, dont yew? *finks tew self** ofurgotshudnawttalktewdacocomnutbanner
egg hoo on?
hoo has egg on tehm?
talk sense, burdie!!
Ooh, we gonna hab egg foo yung an paper wrap chikken?
Weel ,we cud, but yew needz COCOCOMNUTS to mayke it! Sew ai gess wheel starv.
*kk4 curled up in littlol ball on da floor frum da maf* *kittehs dat nawt had der dinner is eying hur wif nawt guud intenshuns* *weekly cries out….halp!*
ai wuz told tehr wud be no maths heer..
**Hed eggsplodes**
Hao bowt yew bahrow mai Fredee Crewgur glubs? Den we nawt haz tew cownt.
or as I lieks to call tehm, The Enforsers….
#6..If’n teh lidderbocks iss full or u meaks me mad
ur shoos will do.
Kitteh’s liddlol wyte spot luks lyk himz wherein dymund nekklus.
#7 Ai am Basement Cat. Bow an wurship meh. Wat ai sez, goes. Wat ai nawt sez, nawt goes. Wat ai…*wayt, is dat can opener?*
.
.
**crikkits chirping**
one last *snerk*
I hasta go… plases to see, peeple to go.
Mite bbl.. but twill be verra late if so.
Bye Leeza-b! Hab fun at dah cocomnut haturz meetun!
And #3 – there is no third thing.
Oh, and #4 – All your base are belong to me, too.
Oh hai Johnnyface!! I don’t think I haz metting u b4. Iz u gnu?? if so, welkum tu Cheezland!! dis b a fun plais tu b playing. Deh onlyest rule heer iz tu playing nice…… a bery eezee rule.
.
*Handz johnnyface a chokklit martoonee.
Cheez!!
Enneewun else gitting “failur tu connect tu web server” messijez???
.
I only gitz dem fur deh ICHC….. uzzer sitez pop rite up wif no errorz…..
ohai, mai cween, haowz yur wevvur? ai strat tu fink sum dis kined ub problum iz frum stromee wevvur. wen strom iz obur getz da paje agen. But olive caim bak frum being baniched yestdy.
Deh wevverz b fine….. and no uzzer sitez b gibbing mii deh error messijez…. just dis wun…. stooopee WP!!!!! I hadz enuff pain in deh a$$ changing deh avatar bak and forth… I don’t need tu habbing moar dan wun identity…. wud drive mii nutz tring tu keep trak uv hoo i b…
Uv korse, now dat I kumplaiyninged bowt it, it b werking fine…..
To be quotin’ teh Red Dwarfses Cat:
“I’m claiming all this as mine …
except that bit. I don’t want that bit. But all the rest of this
is mine!”
umm, according 2 nother pitchur teh kitteh law #2 is “i fits in it i sits in it”
http://icanhascheezburger.com/2008/08/07/funny-pictures-law-2-if-i-fits-in-it-i-sits-in-it/#comments
Awww, dat kitteh haz a wite spot udner itz chinny chin! It looks awmost exaktly lyke mah poar Moonlight kitteh who passed away last monfth. We fink he had pancreatic cancerz. :’(