ritalin kitteh is ready to give you
ritalin kitteh is ready to give you his not divided attenshuns
wifawt mah ritalin, i wud b liek dis.
picture: jus10brown. lol caption: ratedblue
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Cheezburger Network Blog
I was told there would be no maths!
concalculashunz! celebrainshuns?
Has to be maths – ovverwies, no can calc…cattl…figger owt pi frum teh diameters an stuff. No pi, no pi fite – no fun!
Oh, ur rite.
*throws a pi at 2minions*
HAY!
I just gotted those hooliguns unner control!
U is not setting a gud xample LCB…
I may has 2 menshun this to Santa.
Tattlol Tayle!
**swats at leeza’s tayle an runs awf**
Abowt awl dat Leeza-b, iz kinna meh falt teh pi fite happind. Yoo seez Ai axed fur a peece ob pi cuz Ai hadda hungree. Den eberee wun wantid pi nd api fite startid wiil Ai waz gon! Tuu pai bak Ai workz az janiturr uv Pi stawl furr hole yeer oka?
Yu can start bai scrubbin mai fayce…
*luks at LCB, slitely pi-eyed*
*Scrubbz 2minions fayse wunnerin how eesee eet wud b to go Venis war Day iz longurr ten yeer*
Fang queue, Plasticat!
.
Heerz tikkit for trip to ennyware in Solar Sysstem…onna Tardis.
Nyse now Ai can go tuu Venus nda onlee serve a dai ob teh janiturr serbiss!
yu had pi wifowt me…. ize hurt… :pouts:
Be Naughty! Save Santa a Trip!
*SNORK!*
*inhales pi crums wile laffin*
Snerk!
Itz ok, LCB — teh attenshuns iz NAWT divided. No maths rekwired!
Datz gud….. deh lawng divishunz and mii, wii don’t git along.
Maps? Didz u sai maps?
.
um, sum people out dere in our nation doan hab maps and, uh, I beleeb dat our, uh, edumacation liek such as, uh, Souff Africa and, uh, teh Iraq and eberywhere liek such as…
LOL!! ROFL!!! Taht POOR GRRRRRL!!!
*SNERK*
Aifink ai passeded owt when she sed “THE iraq”…..lyke der is moar den wun????
#DIV/0! – Divide by Zero Error
Saved by zero.
Heh. I hadda call teh Comcast customer serviss today. I hasn’t had to deal wif them for a whiles, but many of my naybors has and they has nothing good to day about them.
So I laffed when teh talking menu lady said “To speak wif a customer serviss pre, press zero.”
Cawmcatz? Ai get old emails frum mai cawmcatz frend (evun deliitud wanz!!!) He getz em frum mii tu. Onlii on cawmcatz. Gotta lurve ‘em.
Dat beh hao CC maded blak hoels… dibide bai zeroh!
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! MATTTTTTTH!!!!!!!! *hides n lil corner*
ooh wate.. i sees somthing shinee!!
Iz mai anlklol let. Iz purtee yes? Nawt to let lcb knoes ai haz it pls.
i see you dere…
and wot has being seen cannot be unseeaned…
umm can we jest purtend i wuz nebber here? pweeese?
sooo. wot did da kitteh sea?
A brurglolry in progress by LCB
Big mousie runing away wif kitteh’s fud
Catnip induced halolcination
D…
der undersied of der couch
fud.
gushiefud.
Duks
Elebintee fowsind pownds ob aplols
FTW ritin eberee war!
G…
Grating of cheez
Hell (visions ob it)
Indecent proposals
J…
Jawb innurveiws gawn rong
Kittehs eetin cheezburgers (no wayt, Dat’s gud!)
Lil monsurrs unner teh bed
M…
Maus King dansdansdans
Nawty Barn
Oppertuna teas fur mischif
P…
Ginormaus hugh G. manatee
Hicking Maus
Intelgent aliens
J. . .
Jorlack: teh alien piilit
Kittehs bein chased bii mausis
L…
Gurnseyz
Heffalumpz
Irree dessent shinee fingz
J….
juxtaposishunz of Herb E Side & beeyutiful tendrils
Krispy Kreme Donutz eating contest
Lohengrin, da Opera
Mais Oui tickling da cween
N…
Nabucco, da OPera
Otello, da Opera
Pagliacci, da OPera
Q. . .
Nien laydees dansink
Ovver laydees dansink
Purdy laydees dansink
Quizillions of laydees dansink
Rilly purdy laydees dansink
See, ai tolded yew my artenshun woz not diffided…
Tons ub catnips stoled
Uvver kitteh bein nawty
Veri big goggie
Wants more gushifuds
Xaclee NAWT wot kitteh wanted
Yucky stuffs
Zooms awai wif kwiknes
Kitteh wif ritalin – jus RONG! Hao he can seez birdies an mausies?
U did WAT?
Ai..Ai…it was an accident!
Wayle, ya betetr kleen it up befoar sumbodee steps innit an fawls.
*sigh* okee.*cleans up pile of packaging peanuts she was playing wif*
Hahahaha, dey iz awl stucked to ur furs!
Dey is not! *looks in mirror* oh wells, might as well go play in dem somemore since dey are already stucked. *jumps in giant pile of packaging peanuts that she just organized* wanna join me rhsb?
Shure!
**beeg floofy whyte kitteh leeps into pyle of packing peenuts, skattering tehm eberyware**
Whee!
Mai muddah calls dem ghost poop!
ohai kerrkatz! *throws seberal peanuts at her from a tall dresser*
Oh hai, zaffy21! *Bats peanuts in da air wif zaffy21* First one tu let peenut hit da floor iz rottin egg!
*bats peenut, but was outwitted* darn it. *goes nearer to KK4 to watch her wonderful batting skills*
*kk4 takez zaffy21 by da paw* See, yu bats dem unner fings! Den hoomins mus luuk fur dem! *demonstrates* Heer is large sofa, an heer is large bed. Wif sum praktis, yu kin bat fings tu jes da middlol! *bats peenuts tu middlol* Den hoomins nawt kin fish dem out wifout moobin hebby fings! Yu tries, grasshopper!
*follow kk4’s instructions and ends up batting peenut a bit more closer to teh edges than she would have liked* oo dis is fun! ai will practice until ai am as good as my wonderful teacher!
KK – duz yoo need enny ov dem fashunablol tites tew go wif ur fringee boots?
I almost losted my dinner wen I saw tehm. PLEH!
Um yes..pleez. Ai always wantid mai legs tu luuk like snakes.
SNAAAAAAKE!!!
Iz posed to be pee-cock fevvers, mebbe?
Awn me, it wud be wun BEEG pee-cock!
I nawt needs to bring attenshun to my legz, truzst me awn dis wun.
Ai am torn between da peecok fedders an da brite yellow chevrons…wat tu choose? Iz quandree.
KK4! Are u sittin’ down?
U IS IN TEH ROUGES’ GALLERY!
kthxbuy.com/ichcxmas.html
O, and, u knoes who u should tell about it?
RIPPERTON!
I surpryzed hur pikshur nawt at teh post offis, too.
**gigglols**
Oh, ai am in da gallolree at last!! Ripperton will be so pleesd! *runs kwiklee tu tell Ripper* *Ripper luuk up with disinterest* Oh, he is thrilled fur meh! Ai gonna goes luuk rite now! *runs tu luuk* *yells obber shoulder at rhsb* Ai hurd dat!
I lyks Ripper. Himz purty.
Plz to gibs him snorgles foar me.
Ai wills, rhsb. Him came up tu meh on couch today an lay on mai chest fur purrs an petting..den him stretchy owt arm so it rest bai mai nek. Wuz da cute, liek hims gib meh a hug!
Should we throw some packing peanuts at teh udder cheezpeeps?
*evil grin*
Iz less messy dan pi…
Dey nawt flys bery far doh…we wuld hab tu sneeky up on peeps an drop dem awn der heds, aifinkso.
You read my mind kerrkatz…=D
**luuks teh uthur way**
I knoes nuffin…
*carefully places peenuts awn rhsb’s hed wen hur luuks udder way* *puts paw obber mouf an gigglols*
**shakes hed an peenuts fawl down**
Wat teh….
KK!!!!! Did yoo do dis?
**runs ober to KK an pownses awn hur, fur flyes eberyware**
*kk dives into box ub peenuts* *peenuts fly awl obber da place* kk4 hides wif tayl stikkin owt*
**pullz KK’s tayle**
Gotcha!
*kk4 waits fur rhsb tu show pointy enz* *qwiklee puts peenuts on pointy enz* *giglols wen rhsb starts tu run away*
Pies yew say?
Awl ober the pwace yew say?
And whippy cream yew say?
Her majesties crown yew say?
Coconut crying yew say?
Dats awl berry fascinating.
Tell meh moar!
On teh last fred (if WP fixeded it) – wuz so ginormous it borked WP!
*insert yur own saracastic remark here*
I think WP came pre-borkt.
Yew beh berry wiz, cweenmj.
.
An WP is nommin mah ritins…
*Handz BDM a chokklit martoonee.
Datz ok sweetee. Wii just sit heer and watch.
Deh kidz r being silly tunite.
Fanxu, cweenmj!
.
*sip*
*sip*
*sip*
*GULP*
.
Ahh…. dat hit da spawt
Kitteh shockd at ar shinanagins, aifinkso!
U’d think tehy’d be usta hazzin stoopy hoomins by nao, wuddntcha?
Win dey gunna lurn?
Prolly wat teh kittehs are tinking, tew.
Dis iz ur cat.
Dis iz ur cat on drugs.
dey shudd’ve put this on Friedegg.
ohai Janet!!! *lil ornj kitteh runrunruns across to Janet*
look up, you can haz Missel Toez over yr hed!
*shmoo*
*sees misseltoez obber Janets hed* *runs up and gibs her a kiss on cheek* *gigglols an runs away*
Dis iz ur cat’s response to seeing you on drugs
and wishes dat u wud put ur pants bak on.
And a shirt please, if you don’t minds
An a bag on ur hed wud be nyse.
One pill maeks u larger,
and one pill maeks u smawl…
Go ask Fluffy…
When hurz ten feet tawl.
And Bullit proofs?!
Travis Tritt ref, FTW!
Sarcastic kitteh says: Naw really? Say it ain’t so?!
Hoomin taeked kitteh’s ritalin
and cleaned teh howse, teh car, and teh catbox in 15 minutes.
Wut u meen “Dey stopped makin my favrit gushifuds”?
Mebbe kitteh oddishuning fur tohse weerd Hallmurk cards wif teh big eyed kittehs an goggies.
Ennybuddy else finks tehyz kinda creepi? (hmm, cree pi…)
Ai agrees! dey really are teh creepi.. *shudders*
I has seenum. Do nawt lyk.
Mebee hims taeked anudder pill to stai up awl nite reeding teh books behine him?
Den hims cleen da hole house. An shine da doorknobs.
Butts still habs an epic fail onna test.
Cums hoam to sparklee cleen howse and drowns hims sorrows in nip.
Aifinks him spen da whole test tiem to keep sharpen hims pencil obber an obber an obber an obber……..
U sai OCD liek itz a bad fing.
http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/?s=OCD
LOLZ!
Alright, I’m gonna have to close teh door tew teh offis.
Mahm an dad are watchin teh lokal Krissmiss konsert an itz gettin awn my nerbs.
Saw a sign inna stoar teh uther day an shudda got it: “One more Fa-la-la-la-la an you’re outta here!”
Anom.
Had one kid asks what ai was feeding teh reindeers….Awlmoat toalded him teh reindeer fud wuz too spensive so teh elves maded chilis.
An u riding BEHIND tehm?
**episode of “Seinfeld” runs thro hed, ware Kramer feeds horse beens**
Tehys flyin JET ranedeers!
out ob teh reindeers naot for teh reindeers.
Oh, NAO I gets it!
U bad, WRr.
**tee hee**
Sinse u iz teh reizident Santa, I gots kweshtun: Wut iz teh cut-awf between gud an nawty? Dependin awn ware it iz, I mite be classyfied az “gud” awn teknikalitee.
Dependz on Who U be naughty wif.
adn haow naughty.
Nao I kannawt be revealin dat informayshun!
I iz TRYIN to behave! Nawt an eezy task foar me, ya kno…
Whut happenz in vegaz stayz in vegaz…unless U maeked teh CSI episode.
Jes lyk teh NB.
CSI? Dat wuz last nite wif teh ketchup bottlol.
I nawt shaked teh bbq sawse bottlol tonite! I smartur tahn I luuk, fanks CC.
Yoo kudda sed teh naughtee peepz
Oh yeah! I lyke dat anser!
“Teh rayndeerz eet teh bad chillunz.”
**ebil laff**
*Laffs ebilee wif RHSB*
no fair, WRR. i wuz not prepared, and i snorted chikkin begetabul soop da rong way
Kleen owt ur sinuses, diddit?
Nawt to nom teh chikkin soop when reeding commintz…At least it wuz soops and nawt coca-cola, Dat stings.
Iz dere a RITE way to snort soop?
Jes wunnerin.
I began reedin “The Heroin Diaries” today.
Nawt got to teh part dat tells u hao to snort soop yet.
Kitteh, I has wun werd foar u:
.
DECAF!
.
.
Jes sayin, iz awl…
U nawt switch, u end up lyk teh guyin dis sawng:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=len3_bFqmrE
Hm wut?
srry, ai wuzzn;t payin attenshun…wut did yoo sai?
i SAID *mummble mumblly mumbleee* Got it?
U prolly needz anudder pill.
needz annuthur wut?
srry, dere’z sumptin shinee obbar dere…
A bill…a bill..I said I’z sending u mah bill.
liek a hunnered dollar bill?
Wrapped inna towel.
waet…wut? yoo confuzzled meh…
I wud liek to calls ur attenshun to exibit “A”
http://www.hullcloth.com/store/index.php?main_page=product_info&products_id=186
oooo…..floofeh towlol…
*stiks camra infront uv DK’s fays nda taeks pikshurr* HAHAHA!!!!
*turns hed towardz flash*
oooo…shinee…
Dern eet dint wurk! Ooo niis pikshurr uv DK tho!
wut didn’t werk?
oo….iz meh!!
*Reeches behind DK nda plucks owt sum furr* Neber mind eet- nyse pikshurr, huh? *ebil laff*
U growing furz naow insted of scales DK? Dat nawt gud fur a dragun…U hasta go tu see Dr Tinycat.
um, shudn’t he sees Dr. Tinydragun?
Wif teh furs adn teh scalez mebbee he shuld see bof.
borked thred in 3, 2, 1….
gnite u guiz.
I is too poopt to try and werk around teh borkt thred thing tonite.
I has an early in teh morning too.
Scales- Scales Ai plucked sum “Scales” off himz bak- Butt dun lettin himz noe!
wut? ai has furrz tew??
ai has a confuzzled…
Meh mistaek DK Ai meaned scales
well that shud be a wate off hims back anyways.
Iz u makin me teh wind chimes for krissmuss?
Yooll see wat Ai b doin tummorro!
nebbur miend wut??
Ifinkso yu has it rite – kitteh bersion ov undivided attenshun.
BATTUN DOWN TEH HATCHIS!!!!
SKITTLE KITTLE FIT IN 3 — 2 — 1 –
Kitteh onlee ask fur car keys…stil listnin tu parents bout da rules ub usin da car.
lol…hao troo!
dat wud bee liek mai parental yoonitz…
Doan leeb teh raydeo turned up tew lowd.
Doan leeb teh gas tank awn emptee.
Doan drink an drive – pulll ober sew u nawt spill ur drink.
Jes goes strate der an strate bak
Nawt let enny frends ride in car
Call meh wen yu gits der
Ai gonna chekee da milage, yu noes
Noes dribe tu fast
Noes pik up strangers
Dis big responsybillity yu noes
Nawt eet french frys in car
Member tu lock da doors
Nawt lok keys in car…
Nawt lok keys in car?
Um, I did dat teh uthur day. Dad hadda bring my extry key tew my werks.
Ize likes dis capsun!!
kitteh has ur attenshun that iz undivided in half.
—-m—–m—–
| |( 0 0 ) | |
\ \( ^ )/ /
\ \ (~~) / /
munkies!!!!!
kyoot!
Whoaz dude whats wit da munkies?!
Hay hay weer da munkees
Peepl sez we munkee aroun….
Grate minds…KK4.
Hey hey, we’re teh munkies!
Munkies eat kittehs…
U got ur munkee on mah kitteh!
U got ur kitteh on mah munkee!
Hey, dey iz grate togebber!
Watch out
Baby watch out
Don’t look now
There’s a monkey on your back.
♪ ♫
…
Aw, you, fool, you.
You stick them needles in your arm
I know I been there before.
One little problem that confronts you,
got a monkey on your back.
Just one more fix, Lord, might do the trick.
One h*ll of a price for you to get your kicks. (h*ll, yeah
I heard you knockin on my cellar door….
I love you baby can I have some more
gone, gone the damage done
IT’S RAINING MEN! LOLLELUJAH!
*has uneasy feeling this isn’t teh rite song for this game*
Dat’s okay, LCB.
If it wuz snowin men erlyur, I wud has awl sorts of choyses!
srsly? dang…ai awlwaiez wantud tew kno wut eet wuz liek tew bee snoez…
Wii had lotsa snows heer. Well, lotsa snows foar heer – 4 incheez. Tehn teh freezin rayne fell awn tawp of it.
Sew, I gots to stay hoem frum werk today! Woo-hoo!
I tuuk nap inna afturnoon. Nawt ushually ablol tew do dat – onlee do it wen I relee tyred oar sik — but it wuz nise today.
luckee…
Strangely, a lawt ub snowmen wif carrot noses line up outside rhsb’s house.
**poked hed owtside**
Sowwy guies, u awl kyoot an eberyfing, but I needa REEL man!
I wanna love
I want a fire
To feel the burn
My desires
I wanna man by my side
Not a boy who runs and hides
Are you gonna fight for me?
Die for me?
Live and breathe for me?
Do you care for me?
‘Cause if you don’t then just leave
Snowmens pull owt gitars an sing along…
Teh snowmens kno Kelly Clarkson?
Teh bideo iz teh funnee, btw.
“Walk Away” by Kelly Clarkson.
ive gotta rite a storee abowt that nao… the gurl whu wuz stawlkt bai a snoman.
….until teh heet wave hit….
an then he melted…
but he wuz rillee a hansum prins whu took her away to save hiz kingdum frum teh evil sno witch and teh onlee living thing they fownd wuz a glo-werm…
depends. Iz teh mans fyremans oar exhusbans?
OOOF! *a mens fawls on kk4* *kk4 xamines da man* Hay, dis ones a bum, ai shoulda brot mai bumbrella.
frow himz back. der lawtz of mandrops to chewz frum.
bumbrella?
WIN!
Dekk(heh dats meh naem!) teh offiss wif smart teknologee
GET EET OWT OV MEH HED!!!!!!!!
iz okai DR Ai memoriiizziz TV commershals awl teh tiem! Ai noez fiev uv teh “Free Credit Report Dot Com” commershals, teh Maustrap commershal song, teh Hungry Hungry Hippos Commershal song, dat wun, a kupplol uv Verizon commershals nda others. Tuu maek yoo feelz beddurr:
It’s a zany action
On a crazy contraption
The fun is catchin’
MOUSE TRAP!
nawt tew menshun teh fiev dollur futlawng wun…
OOOOO yea!
Fiev
Fiev dollar
Fiev dollar footlong!
At subway!
Ai almost sang dat atta subway wuns. Gud fing Ai didnt coz dey didn’t maek dem dere!
Wun moar furr Dekk
Deck the office with smart technology
Falalalala lalalala
Get connected and stay secure with
Windows Vista Buisness Lalala
Don We now have Great computers
FALALALALALA LALALA!
Is that teh one wif teh firemans? And construction workers?
Can i order teh channel that shows that commercial 24/7?
calmz down nao lolcatburglar, takez ur ritalin like da gud kitteh…
Shurr!! Onlee costs elebentee cheez slices!
Ai gotz tew go now, iz gettin laet nda Ai haz tew maek shurr awl fud dishis iz ful befour bed den taek shower den brush meh teeth den brush meh retainurr den shut kittehs owt uv livin ruum so tey dun rip teh tree apawt den read “The Adventures of Tom Sawyer” then set meh TV on timer den remember dat meh fons batteree needz tew b charged….
Hey duz doz code fingeez wurk on ICHC?
Testee:
Test
True
C
Cheezburgers!
does Ai pass?
wif flyin colors WRr!
heh…ai haet mai retaynurr…
agreed meh fine scaley flying Cheezfrend-Ai gotta go see wat teh growlin nda thumps nda teh hissin owtsiid meh door iz awl abowt, Nite DK *walks off towards d’Beaker labs wif DK’s scales in paw*
ai nawt can fly tho….ai’z scaley, butt nawt flyin…
nite den plasticat!
Frenz, I gotta go foar teh nite.
I’ll prolly be at werk tomorrow, an if WP an my werk ‘pyooter cooperate, I mite be ablol tew post. Lately, it’z been touch-an-go. If I nawt ablol tew get awn durin teh day, I be heer tomorrow nite, CC willin an teh creek nawt rize.
G’nite, Cheezfrenz!
g’nite!!
{{{{rhsb}}}}
Ni Ni, rhsb!
Oh hai ladees! Ai noes we on da borkd obber 200 comments, but if yu kin luuk at mai piks..well dey wuzzen showin up las ai luuk, but on mai lols, yu kin sees da kwilt dat ai makin fur mai Mom dis christmiss. Mai kittehs wuz helpin meh wif it…
Luks moar lyke catnip kitteh tu mii!
He’s gonna get you when u sleep
He’s evil
Hmmmmm. I see teh weirdness of WP is back.
I posted sum commints on a eerlier fred an dem is gorn. I could see them, was in WBT then wen I look agen, they Diskapeered O.o
Now i can see teh ‘Edit this’ fingy next to cheezpeeps names.?
Wuts goin awn?
ohai awl!
I noes Iz bein gon fur lawng tyme……iz lawng not happi stori, but I duz stil lurkz sumtymes.
I haz got qwestion….. due two de eeckonomy, fishykitteh n I r ina 2 bedrum partment ( spoose hadta getz joob in Skedadle….. gascat comin bak to Skedadle…nudder lawng stori….) n e how partment wuz infestimated wif flez, bagillions ub dem….. weiz bombed da plac two tymes, n vacumez ebery uder dai n brushes da Milokitteh n Peepergoggie eberi dai… iz gettn bedda afta 1 munf…. but I still haz dem n da poor googie iz biten herself ta def, n milo iz losin furz…
duz anibudi noes how ta reli, reli getz rid ub da flez?
it makz fishykitteh sadz ta see her petz hurtn lik dis….
I no noes whuts ta do!
anibuddi gotz an ider?
fanks..
momcat
ohai momcat!
sowry ur hassing all teh pleh trubbles.
U is on the rite track, bombing, but u mite has ur timing off? Teh flea life cyclol is about 21 days. So u has to bomb onse for teh live flees and again in 3 weeks to kill teh next gen. B/c teh bomb duz not kill teh eggses. So u has to bomb teh second time to kill teh flees that hatch from teh eggs that were left.
Alsew, u needs to treat teh aminols too, wif Frontline or Advantage or somethin like that. Just brushin will not werk. Plus if you bombs but doesn’t treet teh aminols, the flees just jump on them.
Sew.. bomb and treet teh aminols… and tehn bomb agin in 3 weeks and retreat teh aminols monthly until u doez not see any more fleez
All this cud be complimacated if ur aminols go outside. U mite needs to treat teh yard… I fink Sevin dust can be used for that. And, if u lets them outside, u will needs to keep using the Frontline, ifinkso. Hope that halps! Deaf to teh flees!!
And hope u has a good hololiday!
fank you skwirrlgrrl-
I will bombz dem again n free weaks…… actumally, Pepper goggie has advantage on herself…. I keepz habin ta put it bak on acause we keepz gibing dem bafs ta wash off da flez.
Milo kitteh turned awt ta beez ‘lergic to advantage ( himz got cute reverse mohawk atween himz earz where himz fur felled out) himz on specil ’spensive kitteh flez medicine…..!
oh fortunmutly deh is bof inside animalz sos dat a beeg help.
fanks again!
momcat
Jeenus!!!!
HA HA ! iz cyootest kitteh evr
No,relly, that skurt luks grate…