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K, ai got teh resources, u brings teh fumbs! Go!
Congrats, Upfi. Teh solo nawt sekund priez iz urs!
Fank u! Ennywun wunts sum hawt drinks (tee, cawfee, hot chocklit) and sum muffins or apple and cinnamanamonny loaf? I’ll be off to lunch soon, so halp urself! *puts out coffee table wif noms and drinksies*
I has to cancel teh danse due to snow! IT’s all slippereeeeeeeeeee here!
Gud moarning ebreewun! Layte to bed, latye to rise – taht’s mee!
.
So thanks fur teh cawfee an applol an cinnamanamonny loaf, upfi! Verree nice ov yoo!
.
*sip sip sip sip sip*
*nom nom nom nom*
*sip nom sip nom sip som*
.
*smyol* ai ar gud to go nao! An conga ratz to teh lufflee Upfi Up there awn teh rooftop!
Oh, fanq-u, Upfi. A good mug of hot tea is just what I need. And apple and cinnamon toast is delicious. Be full of care driving, k?
My laser eyes not strong enough this morning to open can… you do it.
i mok u bcuz o no has ‘posabl fums…
Nevur fiir, kittoon — halp iz on teh waii.
Dey shoold call dis ting a “can’t” opener.
LOL!!!! FTW!!!! Elebenty burgers 4 u, Daisy!
::blushes:: Tanks! I share teh burgerz wit evrybuddy!
Moar burgers fur Daisy!! @@@@@ @@@@@ @@@@@!!
*SNERTLE*
when ai evolvz fumbs, dey will b da weapunz uf ur demyse bai strangulayshun!
Opposable thumbs … I not haz dem
Dis be why Ceiling Cat cree8ted Hoomans…. to surv us…
catslave, did ai ebber say ai luv yur link???? Did yoo create it – oar ar you a riter??
Janetcanhaz4kittehs
fanks 4 ur commeznts bowt “Tales from teh Sleepin Dragon Inn”
Dat is a group ef4t by elebenty riters who has been werkin on teh story 4 bowt 8 or moar years now. Teh current group consists of 5 riters who rite 4 multiple characters. bleev mez iz hard 2 keep things straight.
Youz can leave mez a mezssage on mah profile, if youz want.
Wowsers, wutta websyte!!!! Ai ar bowleded oaver bye suches a mahssive effourt adn talint!!
Thanks catslave!! Ai luked at it B4 – an wai ai dint menshun it ai donut know! an ai hazzn’t had taim to reed it yet – but ai did reed awl about it!
.
*sigh* maybee in teh noo yeer ai will hav sum moar taim! It luks laik such FUN!!!
Gud moarnin, Cheezland!
Happitayle Day Befoar Caturday!
I hoep urs starts beddur tahn mien has. I lockeded my kees (an eberyfing eles) in my car! I did get sumwun tu lets me intew works, but I has no cawfee, no fone, no munees, no fuds, no nuffin until dad gets heer wif teh spare set.
wwaahhh!1! rhsb, tings haz gotz 2 go ups 4u nao. jus hagn n dere. us cheez frenz feelz ur payne…
Eeeek. I had an upset, rhsb, when I read you’d locked your *knees* in the car. My brain had you srsly injured, wif smasked knee caps. Phew! So bery glad iz onlee ur keys. But dat’s bad enuff, the pleh way to start any day.
*Q. wipes own fevered brow…
Ai wuzn’t goin 2 sai ennifing, but dat’s egg sacklee wat Ai red nawt sekund!
Ai fot “knees” tuu; GMTA!!
me too.
better kees tahn knees, less painful, tho maybe just as disabling…
No fumbz – no fudz.
(Laifs hard…)
Ha ha, kitteh got no fumbs! Lol, lol….OWIE!!
.
Who needs fumbs wen u gotz pointee endzes?
Kan opener luks wierd. Maybe is new model?
sillii, is OLD modl. It are manual.
We has one. Eye still has trubble usin’ eet.
LOL. Dis teh onlee kan openur we has. Frenz sez, “whare iz yur kan openur?”
“In teh drawer”, I sez
*confuzed luks frum frenz*
*lolz frum me*
mah hows iz a blast frum teh past!
we has nebbur had a rotaty-spinni openur eithur. Nawt enuff plugs in kitchen.
Me, too. Or me, never. Dat iz, i has only a manual. Lessee – things my kitchen does not have:
garbage disposal
microwave
dishwasher
ice maker
i culd live wifowt all tohse fings (not happily, but i culd, akshully i lives just fine wifowt teh icemaker) eggsept teh garbage disposal. i lived two yeerz wifowt garbij disposals, teh first two yeerz we wuz marryed an livin in student rent-a-hovels, an i swered nebber agin. i told my hubby yoo kan put me in any kind ob howse yoo want, but it must be habbing a garbij disposls.
In TTI most houses can not has teh garbij disposlols… we can has rubbish bin!
Compost pile for me. Eggsept in the cold and frozen months.
in winter, wud that maek it a compfroze pile?
whut iz TTI?
Kittyboocat, ai lurnd dat TTI is Teeny Tiny Ingland!! Ai hads tu ask tu, cuz ai not kin figgur it out, noe madder hao hard ai tryd!
kitteh needz nu hoomin, wun witout mockairy. ai can has him?
Opens tha can or I lazerz u in tha face.
Hmmmm; mebbee tihs bees a paiyebakk foar teh tiem teh kitteh shreddid teh kaurpit; oar teezed teh goggie murceelesslee foar elebentey minnits; oar chaised alla rohbins outta teh bakk-yaurd; oar rippeded oapen teh bagg ov kitteh-treets adn skattured thems awl oaver teh kytchin floar;
oar eetid awl teh leyftoaver cuukees; oar….., oar….., oar……!
O hai, ckk!
Teh kitteh didn’t du dat! Didn’t teh kitteh tell you that it was the goggie?
Hmmmm; yesh hims dyd;
(hims uoosuallee teylles me taht, tho…….!)
Butt what about teh goggie?
Doesn’t hims have a say in dis?
ah, ma too pashunz:
kittehs and sadism!
Halfbeast!! Hai again!! Yoo shud com bai moar offen!!!!
lol…no thumbs. i mock you kitteh
Heer ai iz! Der wuz such wondermus tallints dis morning, mai hed is reelin..reely it iz.
Oh, well…
**crikets chirping**
Ai will sing maiself a sawng tu passes da tiem here, all alone…an sad…
Heer ai type, awl brokin harted
Mai pitty partee, it haz started.
I sing wif u.
.
Miiii adn mai
…………………SHADoe
Awl aloan adn feline
…………………….Blooooooo!!!
Hello, cweenmj, yur sawng wuz jes lubbly dis morning!!
Thankz…. Adn ur Bette Davis impressun wuz spot on!!!!!
Oh, fankee, cweenmj! Ai is still scrubby off day eyeliner an lippystik. Ai wurnt shur if minee peeps memberd dat moovie!!
Was da mostest fun fur meh! Ai usully watchee frum da sidelines an laff an laff later on finkin bout awl da funneh peeps on heer!
oh kk, ur Bette Davis, that wuz my biggest LOL, next to wurdpress getting throttled!!
‘smilols wif red lipstik on hur teef’…. ROFL still!!!
Oh fankees, leeza-b, ai still laffin at yur wondermus majik show wif Maus! Dat wuz da win!!
Dere b plennee uv us old fogeyz arownd.
.
Wen I nawt-sekkund started reeding deh ICHC commintz, I assumed dat awl deh comminterz were dhe uber smart yung peepz….but after a wylez I figgered owt dat deh peepz iz uber smart, but ney not awl yung. In fakt dere b sum eben owlder dan mii…..
*gigglols at cweenmj* Dis wai we beh sew smart, aifinkso!!!
:shokeefayce: Iz taht pawsibul???? *gigglols*
*pownces on Janet
*bapz onda bakka deh hed wif deh paw
*runz away not-so-fast cuz i b owld.
*fawlz ober – but nawt frum teh bapz – frum teh laffing!!!*
*hobbles obber tu Janet* *swats hur tayl wif a slowness* *ambles away stiffly*
ai izza 53 yearz YUNG aifinkso!
Ai jes roted to C.rose, ai nawt want hur tu miss all da tallint! Ai still laffin!
Plonk, plonk, plonk on toy piano, accomp… akum… along wif KK4 singing.
Wat lurberly moosic yu plonkees, Q!
KBC crawls back to stage
*slinky back onna stage *
howza bout sum stan up comuddy?
*crickets chirpping*
aaaHEM! *clears throat,*
Three men were hiking through a forest when they came upon a large raging, violent river. Needing to get to the other side, the first man prayed:
‘God, please give me the strength to cross the river.’
Poof!
God gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swim across in about 2 hours, having almost drowned twice.
After witnessing that, the second man prayed: ‘God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river’ Poof!
God gave him a rowboat and strong arms and strong legs and he was able to row across in about an hour after almost capsizing once.
Seeing what happened to the first two men, the third man prayed: ‘God, please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river’
Poof!
He was turned into a woman. She checked the map, hiked one hundred yards up stream and walked across the bridge.
*bows to audience*
*wild applaws* ROLF!! kittyboo!!
Can stil doo speecel bit fur show?
*putz awn tap shoos*
Ahemm..Ai duz emitashun ub Gregory Hines dooin Mi an mai shadow..
*sings wile tap dancing* Mi an mai shadoow, dancin dwn da abenuw,
Jus mi an mai shadow, awn a suuny abernoon..*bows an quickly exsitez da stgge*
*clappy clap floofy paws dat ar sore frum sew much clappys* Dat wuz da byootimus dans and singees, C.rose!!! Wasn’t dat da funnyist thred ebber? ai still laffin!
Dat was fantsstic jok and fanx fur da kompleemnt tu.
OOo dat wuz gud…..I lubz a gud tappee dans!!!
.
CCR haz u lukkinged at deh talint sho on deh “Getting reddy” LOL??? b shur and klikk on deh “Show All” thingy by deh number uv commintz so u kin seeing everthing…..Dere b sum berry funny peepz on dat LOL!!!!!
Yep.. Ai luukd at dem bef4 ai com tu do mai bit ub so cawled talent
Wen LCB cums bak awn sumone will tell hur tu luuk at this thred tu! Oh, mai, ai still laffin at dem funneh cheezpeeps!!
W00t!!! w000t!!! applolsauce!!!
LOL! LOL! LOL!!
Hoorah! FTW! and for truth, too.
*does handsprings and cartwheels of joy
but wut doez teh lolcatburgeler tink? an did she gittin owt ub teh trapdoorhole yet? or iz she still onna udder tred?
okays peeps… I hasta go run some errands.
Get a krissmuss tree and stuffs.
If anyone else wants a reeding by Madame Zorba, I will get to them in teh next lol!! BBL
Bai, leeza-b! Gud luuk tu finds chrissmis tree dat yu liek! Dribe safe owt der!
N E buddy ceein the lolcatburgerler? wuz she who tol uz tew be addition… awdicious.. tryin owt today..
LOL!
SKREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
*tapps the microphone**click!click!*
wuz gonna let sumun elze go nexties, but since iz nawt soe much goin awn heers…aaaHEM!
An older lady gets pulled over for speeding…
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Ma’am, you were speeding.
Older Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I see your license please?
Older Woman: I’d give it to you but I don’t have one.
Officer: Don’t have one?
Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Officer: I see…Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Older Woman: I can’t do that.
Officer: Why not?
Older Woman: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer: You what?
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want
to see.
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer 2: Ma’am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Older woman: Is there a problem sir?
Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Older Woman: Murdered the owner!
Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.
Officer 2: Is this your car, ma’am?
Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The officer is quite stunned.
Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license…The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.
The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
Officer 2: Thank you ma’am, one of my officers told me you didn’t have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.
ohai i deidicake dis tew alla teh maturity wimminz inna audinz… awdeeinch.. here todai
Ai hab one tu share wif da wimmins.
*ahem*
An older couple iz walkin awn da beech, wen dey fine a majikal lamp. Da man rubs da lamp an a geeny poof out ub it! Da geeny sez yu eech gits one wish!
Da woman sez, ai wishes tu be habbin a millyun dollars so dat ai kin trabble an see da wurld. Da geeny sez poof, yur wish is granted. Da man tell da geeny, ai wishes tu hab a wife who is 40 yeers yunger den meh. Da geenie sez poof… an De man is suddenlee 125 yeers old.
OMG…HAHahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaha ai can’t..*owt uf bwreff frum laffen soe hard an holdin sides*..git ober dis joke..OMG…ai gotta twell pepple bout dis wun…..ROFLOL….
Der wunce wuz an old woman woo libed inna shoe
Her haz soe many chillin’z her nawt noe wat tu do
So her gibs dem bac to da peeps dey belong tu
and off she went wit the travflin salesman…dey flew.
Hee wuz apprsheateive ub oodder wemmen…
This is kinda sad, this looks exactly like a kitty I used to know..to see it treated like this is very
Right um its not realy hurting or starving the cat the cat may not even know whats going on. Most likely the cats like “hello”. Unless the owner has trained it to regognize a can and opener, it’s likely oblivious to it all, if even hungry anyway.
WHAT!?
Lol yay I’s done this to my kitteh, he is Spike, but he’s to smart. He noses the can opener to my feet and mrews at me. He knows whats up
This reminds me of an episode of Looney Tunes, where Sylvester is left at home without food. He gets the can out of the cabinet, but doesn’t have the can opener. The mouse has the can opener, so at the end of the episode Sylvester finally gets the can opener. He goes back to the cabinet and realizes all the food was locked in, then finds out the mouse has the key.
i wob u lol cats.
SMILES
(\_/)
(><o Oops! My gut was busted!!!!
\/\/o
o
I’z noze dat da poynt uf da pichurz iz tu luk attid da kitteez, buttid duz ennykitty elz ‘sydez mineownselfz fink dat fwoor iz fugly???