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Trevor desperately wanted a good grade in obediance school, but the final exam was not what he’d expected.
der iz no such fing as kitteh obedience skool.
picture: Rachael Hale. lol caption: marthasgallagher
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I can has ur interventshuns, plz?
Does u has tallints?
Fr’instance, can u…
-– Reassemble a car engine wif just a toothpick and a stikka gum?
-– Jump a tricycle over a tank of rabid weasels?
–- Turn teh whirled on wif ur smile and/or killer hot chocklit recipe?
U cans? Prove it! On teh very next pic we will be havening auditions for teh ICHC Can Has Tallint Show at teh JCH4K Amphitheatre. U will be givened a number and when ur number is called (or when u feels like it) u get up on whut’s left of teh stage and does ur thing. Due to teh low-techniclol conditions, u will has to describe to us ur act as u is acting it. Members of teh Cheezland Dysharmonic Orchestrar will be there to accompinny u musically if u needs. So get ur costumes reddy, rehearse ur musics, and make sure ur insurances is paid up.
Cheezpeeps has been camping out outside teh JCH4K Amphtheatre for days now, so we expect teh auditions to run all day and mabye over several pictures. If u can’t be there at teh beginning, u can join in later in teh day for ur audition.
This should provide minnits of enteratainments! Thx and let’s be tallinted out there.
If I is not there, plz to start wifout me.
Calling awl orkester players!! Wii neez no rehersul, tihs be a site-reedin gig. See u there!
Zauberflolute, would u be good enough to see if teh first chair kazoo is up yet? He had a wild night last night. Or so I hear.
Also, see if teh musical saw section is back from Home Depot?
*fwooof*
dusts off solid silber Gemenhart flooot.
I aer reddy fur my solo, Zauberflololute. Az long az i duzn’t have to go out 0 da comfort zone of noats writ inclusieve 0 da Trouble Clef.
*luks hoepfulz*
0, BTW, i duzn’t rember da finnerings for Bflat or F sharp. Adn i seem to has gumm on da pinkypad 0 right hand where it shud be cork or sumfink. and the rolly fing duzn’t roll. But i can just leave does notes out, rite?
LOL!!! Ai used to play teh floot – sort ov – too!! Ai still haz wun – but ai don’t think – ai think it luks laik yurs!!! ROFL!!!
ooooh, a silber Gemeinhardt! ai hadda Gemeinhardt wunst, nawt silber tho. open-hole, uv corse? we can haz duet?
dang. oprah tuna tea knock’d and i wuz not dere to anser it. i can has rain chek?
*ahmem*
[a noun Sir]
and hear she iz, our WMD, who keepz US all saef frum da alein invashuns!
♫☼☺☺♪♪
FEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelines,
*big bref*
nuttin moar dan FFFFFFeeeeeeeeeeelines
*crickets*
oh, wait. iz not time fr da Audacious?
:blusshyfaze:
nebberminds…
i go twerk naoz…
♪wissel wile you werk…adn anoy doze co werkers…cuz dey prolly aer ale’ynz♫
U gots ale’ynz at ur wurk? Kewl! Whut r dey, andorianz, klingonz, romulanz, ferengi ( tehy wood now how tu mayke biznezz profitable), cardassianz, orionz, kahn-ut-tu, scalosian, kelvan, elasian?
Furgot vulcan!
Yoo cud doo a scene frum “Star Trek!” fur teh Awe-dishuns!!
Ohhh, maybee teh wun wear Spock dies.
Eye alwais cri wen eye sees dat wun,
eben though eye nose hee iz cummin bak!
O – GUD wun!!! Ai awlwaiz crai there too!! EBREETAIM!!
.
“I have been and always shall be your friend.” WAAAAHHH!!!!
An wen tehy putz dere handz onna bof sydes uff teh
transparent aluminum wall iz sew sad. *snif*
*huddels next to Tribble an weeps an whales!!
I thot deh whaylez wuz in a differnt movee??
Oh, hai cweenmj, is yu xcited bout da tallint audishuns? ai hab mai limited tallint alreddy reddy alreddy!
definitely not Vulcan.
and wookies
Ai lub milk an wookies.
…yurm…
Yoo dunk yur wookies??/
ai nawt milk dem, dats furr shur!!
OHAI sweetpea! Dyoo think yoo can play fur mee! Ai think ai mite be singing an aria frum sumthing! Maybee “Messaih,” fur KrissMas. “Rejoice”, purrhaps???
on my lunch minuets, yes. meet me in da shmelly break rum fr ree herd sal.
Ohai JCH4K – Ai wus finkin sumfink simlar – mebbee awl teh mewsishuns an awl teh corral singists cud joyn forses an we can has Teh Mess Eye Ya, form skratch! Or praps we shud sayve taht fur neerer to Crissmuss? Ai awlwais tink its nawt Crissmuss wivowt a gud helpink ob Teh Mess Eye Ya!
LOL! Prollee neerer to Cirssmuss wud be bedder!! Ai think we ar laking in origmai zashunal taim.
.
But we CUD do it!!! Letz put awn ar thinking caps!!!
Ai has mai coppee ob teh skor taht Ai “borroed” form skool…..!
yay!! i haz my talint, an my costyoom, an a
bribegift for teh judjiz all reddy to go!!*eegerly gets in line, bownsing up an down in anticipay – - – - – -
.
.
.
.
.shun*
* eyes LM’s bouncing… anticipation *
*whacks mick wif her talint sho duffel bag*
* goes to stand somewhere… safer *
speshully sinse teh duffel bag iz contayning, among ovver fings,
a unicycle…
Y iz nun of dis AT ALL related 2 da post?
I wondered that myself.
RABID WEASELS!!
I waz attakd by 1 ov dem once. It skrached mai eye.
Nah, jk, that’s just what my mom wanted me to say when I scratched mai eye.
Shuda studied moar!
Nothing can prepare you for kittehs..even sleeping ones.
Not a reply to your comment, but I love the picture with it! Cute kitty in the Santa hat!
The examinier used teh pointy ends!
iz moar dan da goggiee can bear…
But he traied so hard. . .
Psst! Dog! Teh answer is: Mt. McKinley!
Go tew teh head ov teh class!
I hope teh dog hasnt peaked too young.
LOL!!! We used to say sumtaims taht sumwun “peaked” at teh audishuns!!
ifinkso taht iz being a gud ansser for just abowt any qwestun.
Gradin on a curve!
or shud it be,
Gradin on a ppurrve?
Maybe not.
it cud be gradin on a purrr…..
He hadd such dreamz uff going tu a gud colledge lyke Barklee or Pawston.
That dog has cats on teh brain!
An a littrbox mind.
A dog walked into a bar with a cat on his head…
Is this a prevue of ur talint, Maus?
Oh skwirrlgrrl, ai doo hoep so! Ai reelee need a gud laff today!!
Well… it’s a talent, but not the one I was going to showcase today. Assuming my stoopy werks will even let me audition. Feh.
Hope u can be tehre!
I wuz hoping to
useenlist u as my assistint.Um… OK, I guess. What would I have to do?
nothin really… I do all teh werk.
And u get a nise trip out of it!
I has to go now, Fridays is my 1/2 day, so I has to leave on time so I can get home in time for teh audations!
*sittingsittingthinkingsitting* ummm adn the bartender says?
The bartender looks up and says “Where did you get that ape?”
The dog says “This isn’t an ape, it’s a cat”. The bartender says “I was TALKING to the cat”.
LOL!
Dat pikcher is so cyoot, wif da bebbe kitteh ahsleep awn da goggie hed.
Paur goggie. But he mebbe passez de eggs zam?
*Rimshot*
Try da veel.
I be heer awl week.
;o)
That’s a good one!
I has a irgonomikalleee korect nappy plaese! mmmm Stae still, pleez.
OOOH Treva, pleez tew hang in, a liddle kitteh drwol inyer eye is sew worf a futya in teh fast fud service inderstree
mai test(y) abracadabra come bck santy hat !
why eet show up in WBT butter nawt here *fingasXd*
Hao duz yoo lyk mah noo chapeau?
Looks like u gots a chateau insted.
Shall we – perhaps – share a gateau?
Oooh yes! Whut a nice cadeau.
nebber mybd taht… summeday sai GATEAUX?
.
imminent om nom nom, aifinkso!
Quel deaux-deaux.
pfft… * puts awn FCHRG(wdoi), Faux Moose Stash adn terroblol Fronsch Ack Scent *
.
Ah, madame! Hao yu sai…? Helleau?
Hallo! Is this ur… bateaux?
Is teh fake. A faux bateau.
s’il vous plait, ne pas de bateau le tete. Merci.
Oui. It is seaux.
Leaulx???
@@@@@
le lolfronsch toojours FTW!
Who? Me and mai beau?
A HARE off topic, but heer, we reelee haz teh sneau. Beau sneau, certainement, mais beaucoup de sneau, nebbertheless!!
Ohai, J4K! *hugs J4K* So gud to seeing yoo! We had a liddel ice storm yestiday but we is OK. We has a teenie bit uv snow heer in central PA, but nawt alot. Just enuff to mayk it look lyke a winter fairyland. It is teh gorgeous! Just lyke a postkard pikshor!
{{{{{{gremlin}}}}} An TAHT iz wai we lives heer where it snows!! Becuz it is so prittee!! An maeks teh spring flowerz awl teh prittier too!!
ooh tish! fronsch!
Wish ekzams at my school had inclooded sleeping kittehs.
Wood mayk my ekzam nitemares a lot moar bearable.
“A sleeping cat leaves Chicago at elebeny o’clock, traveling at 35 miles per hour…”
At teh sayme tiem, a restless pinny gig leaves Cincinatti, traveling in relative comfort in the passenger seat of a late-model Miata with the top down…
* whispers *
.
psst… Q… yu has NAWT seed meh, otay?
Nawt a wisker….
Sew fer ten poynts, wut tyme will da pinny gig’s braynes splort all ovver da Miata wen it seez da cyoot sleeping kitteh?
(And hau kin a sleeping kitteh trabbel at 35 mph? No mention if it wuz on a trayne.)
oops, eye fergot . . . dah kitteh is on trevor’s hed, so Trevor mus run verree fasssst.
At the sayme time, a cat slave (human) runs an electric can opener in Boise…
wich wakes the kitteh an he getz tu Boise befour Trevor.
Ai hab kweshun bout tallint show…if we member anudder tallint after audishun, or if tallints nawt goes togedder, kin we audition da udder tallint later? Or duz we jes skwish awl tallints togedder in won magniffycent act?
Teh answer is: Yes
In teh unlikely event of multiple tallints, Cheezpeeps can has multiple auditions. But if they can combine teh tallints wifout damaging teh amphitheatre, their reputation and teh psyches of teh peeps watching, I say goforit.
Fanks LCB *searchs dusty craniul cavity fur hiddin tallints, sneezes frum da dust bunnehs* We is awl lukkin forwurd tu da minnits ub entertaynmint.
but but but… wat bowt multiplol personaleetees?
Ach, yesh! Ai can plai tu?
et moi?
Hey, what’s going on??? Does anyone else see 3 Guinea Pigs???
.
* looks at bottle of meds *
Dats gunna be a lawng audishun…..
Hay, GP: prittee sune yuu gunna haz az mennee purrsohnnas az Maus;
(Nawt taht iyt wuud bees suches a badd fing, ov coarse; weeeeeek, weeeeeek, weeeeek!!!!)
* weeeeeeek weeeek weeeek *
.
Egg Salad impreshun, CKK!
EEEEEK!!! EEEEEK!! EEEEEEK!!
.
WP (no relayshunt to GP ai am shur!!) just eight TWO ov mai commmints!!!
They were HEER!! an nao – they ar NAWT!!!
Hay, teh 3 of u and Mick can does a barbershop kwartet!
Hay, why iz Mick allowed? I finked dis wuz a am-uh-chur tallint show! Himz a purfeshunul!
Mick? a purfeshunul?
.
* fawls ober lolling *
BAH! I’ll show you, little pig!
.
* strut pout strut pout strut pout *
Yew sea? Yew sea? Da strut, da pout, da tite pants, (um, da tite pants), da drugs, habin to be care-eed awf da stage at teh last concurt, Ai’m tellin ya, himz a purfeshunul!
OK… now, you’re all seeing a talking parrot too, right? RIGHT?
.
* takes more meds to counteract earlier meds *
yah, him luks reely prufeshunal wif taht big shiner on himz fayse wher i wuz forced to whak him wif my unicycle cawz him wuz ogling my anticipayshun
LCB, has u a playse fur reeding ob poh-emms? Mebbe a smawl staj on teh odder syde awai frum teh orkeestra so peeps donna gets distrakkeed?
This is auditions. We will not has full orchestra, just those that was not detained for kwestioning after their last rehearsal. Poetry reedings is teh ok!
Fankies. Is wun ai rote speshul fur teh okashun. Ai hopes u lyk it.
Ohai Kerrykatz4, and gud morning tew yew, lolcatburgla. I arribed erlee in case LCB needz enee help settin up. I alsew brot sum hawt cawfee and breffist for you, LCB, knowing dat yew were probbly too bizzee to eet, and how you alwayz fink about odder people furst. Dat’s jist wun ov yur minee wunnerful kwalitees.
Ai sees wut yu up too, parrothead! Hmph, actin liek yu sayin gud morning tu meh, an reely jes tryin tu brown-beek LCB! Ai is shawkt an appalld! *kwiklee grabs coffee and sum brekfast* *continyus lecture wif mouf full* mmph mmwah pfftmph!
**shockyfais** Uv coars nawt! I jist didden ‘spect inneewun else to be hear so erlee, I wud FINK ebereewun else needs to be practisin!!
Ai trys tu rite mine owt on compooter sew ai culd jes cut an pasty it, but da spell chek go crazee an nawt lets me cut wifout correkshuns! Ai gonna see if ai kin turn it awf. Hab yu bin praktissin, yung chickee?
**Settuls down besyde KK4, pours kawfee.** I haz, but ai iz habbing dat same problem wif da stoopy spellcheck. Ai HATEZ dat new windowz an it’s stoopy ‘ribbuns.’ Can’t fynd nuttin.
sew…..
parrothed, from wot u says, u doesn’t need practiss?
U mus have a reeeeeeeeeeally gud talent…….
Ohai skwirflgrrl!!! Hab sum kawfee!!! I practissed awl nite!!! My tallint iz no bedder dan eneewun else, Ai’m shore. **hed under wing to hide snicker face**
No, No, I jist practissed erlee sos I cud arribe erlee to get my number, AHEM I mean so I cud help LCB if her needed inee help, witch Ai’m shore she duzn’t, wut bean so organized and on-da-ball as she iz, yew no.
More kawfee?
Ya, yu bin praktissin awl nite an awl day yestadai awl rite. Praktissin tu get awn LCB’s gud sied!
waidaminnit… LCB had a ‘gud’ sied? lettuce sea…
.
* turns lcb ober adn ober adn ober *
Ohai GP!! KK4, AWL ov LCB’s siedz are gud! Dere iz no bad sied! [we will ignore dat tindency to steel fings]
*kk4 puts awn hur dung-arees an hip waders*
hmm.. aifinkso yu has nebber bin a Phlonquais!
.
Well, she nawt so bad, rly. Ai has has awl weeek weeek weeek awf frum mai phlonquaisesque doodies adn she seems tu be maneegeeng juss fyne wibowt meh…
.
* feels unlubbed, unwanted, underpaid *
Iz okai, GP, bery suun yu will feel obberwurkd an unneraprechiated, jes liek old tiems, ai is shure.
{{{{{{{{{{{{Guinness PIggeh}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Iz awrite. Soon az yew git back tew ur doodies, yew will feel lubbed, wanted, and, um, well, yew will fee bedder.
LCB is a good boss dat way. So fayre and honest and noble an understandin…
yesh yesh, prolly rite! Otay, nao ai has tu get bakk tu mai otter projekt… aifinkso dey is delibering teh elebenty tons ob sand todai!
.
* scampers off behynd teh non descript fence arownd lcb’s back garden *
Bi da way, yew luk bery nyce in hip waderz, KK4.
Silly phlonquais. Of coarse we miss u. We has done teh best we can while u was gone, but there has been a few… prollems.
O, that remines me: when u comes back, can u bring…
Anti-itch creme
Balms of all kines
Calliope repair kit
Divining rod (cant find teh warshing mashine after the flood)
Emergency mediclol personnel
F…
Flite geer
Grape jam (just in cayse)
Hermione’s wand
I. . .
O Hai, KK4:
Mai spehll-chek dieded bowt ten munfs agoe;
bowt 2 weaks afture Ai caime awn ICHC foar teh nawt
sekund tiem!!!!
Adn iyt’s nebber ebber bin herd frum agen!!
Oh hia, ckk, aifinks ICHC kin bork any spel chek!
But. . .but. . .Can’t yoo just put “ignore?” oar. . .cawl it a noo werd??? az in “add to dikshun aiery??? Hao DARE it tell yoo waht yoo can doo!!!
Dat’s rite, JCH4k, is jes stoopy mashine, an AI noes wut ai wanna type awn it! Ai has an angree at it! Ai nawt noes if yu kin cut an paste on heer, but aifinks it wuld beh faster den tu type da hole fing den post it. Ai nawt wants tu lose mai turn! *kikee compooter wif floofy foot* Ow!
I typees fingz up in deh Notepad and duz deh copy paste tu deh commint. It werks ok but sumtimez I haz tu deleting deh “hard returnz” dat end up in plaises i dusn’t wanting dem.
Ai can sing an cleer a roomful uv peepl at teh saem tiem. Will dat do?
Dat amayzin tallint, annipuss!! Den yu gets da stage awl tu yursalf!
Ohai Annipus!!! Dat souwnz lyk an amazin tallint!!! Purhaps yew cud go right after mee, witch wud make ur number…2!!!
mai 2 leff feetz wanna audii…auwd…tri owt.
i can haz turn?
btw, Trevor, dere’s a bebbeh kitteh on ur hed.
am i late??
Iz it tiyme yet??
Huh?
Iz dis deh line fur deh awdishunz?
.
Du I luk ok?
Howz mai hairz?
I just shined mai shooz.
Hope i dint skuff em on dhe way over.
.
I almost trippt over a dog wif a cat on himz hed.
Wutz up wif dat??
.
Oh, sorry, dint meen tu poking u wif mai umbrella.
U ok?
I’ll just stand rite heer and wait.
Dis iz deh awdishun line, isn’t it??
.
Did I miss enneefing??
.
Oh. u gotz a number??
Ware I go tu gitz a noomber??
Over daer? OK.
.
Hi! Iz dis wair i gitz deh awdishun number??
Fankz.
*lukz at number.
ELEBENTY!!!!
O noez! I new I shudda got up eerlyer.
LOL!!! Yoo ar nawt layte – an yo0 luk fantabulolous!!!
.
But – waht ar yoo gonna doo??? Ai still hazn’t maed up mai mind!! Such az it iz.
Oooh. I haz sumfing planned…..I just say it b a klassik……but, janet, kan u keeping a seekret???
.
Uv korse, u kan. Well……
*whispurrz: mfl swssnnn mrwt bzz sspzzmm mlfn 2!!!!
OooooooooooH!!!!!
*whispurz bak* t mughbvtsm righyos msofhso jl soli gls ifnddls?
ohai, cween, i guess i’z in line just ahed ob yoo, my number iz elebenty minus 1. i hopes evreewun likes my costyoom! i’z afrayd wurdpress might nom it for a while cawz it not wurks wif teh w w w. or mebbee i shuld just go wif teh copyanpayste style. hmmm….. i fot i wuz reddy, but now i’z not so shur… *fidjits nerbusly*
I haz sum bayleez. It will helping wif deh bak stage fritez, ifinkso.
*poorz lunarmommy a helfee shot uv bayleez
*poorz wun fur hersef, 2.
Janet u want sum Bayleez??
*Poorz a jigger fur Janet
Cheez!!!
THANKS!!!
Cheez!!
*gulp* Wun moar, pleez!! Ai haet teh OW!dishuns!! Sumtaims mai nees shayke!!
*Poorz nuzzer jigger fur sef, passez deh bottlol tu Janet.
Cheerz!!
fanks! iz teh alkyhol-free yet still medisinal bayleez, i assoom? *chugs it bak*
oh yes….. berry medisinul!!!!!!
*passes deh bottlol to ;unarmommy
Oooh, I needs a nummer, too. How do I getz one?
yoo takes wun frum teh nummber dispenser. liek teh wun at teh deli cownter at teh groshree store taht iz alwayz empty so yoo haz to keep trak ob wher yoo were among teh ovver fifty-eleben peeples hoo iz pushing in frunt ob yoo at hungry-oklok in teh ebening wen all yoo want to do iz buy a bag ob fryed chikkin to feed yor hungry fambly cawz yoo culdn’t fink ob anyfing to cuk cawz yoo cuk supper evree day ob yor life an yoo gets tired ob alwayz makin teh same fing over an over an… huh? wut wuz teh qwestion?
{{lunarmommy}} afta putting dinnah on table at
almost elebenty o’clock last night for tired hubbycat
I hafta say I don now how moms do it by 6.
*writs in sekrit diary – no fancee dinnahs befor caturday!*
we uzually eets at 6:30 or 6:45. sumtimes tehr iz skool fing or church fing erly an we haz to eets at 6:00 or eben 5:30, an i
just
kant
do
it.
pleh.
**pours lunarmommy heftier shot of baileys**
how do we get your happitail back?
taek me owt to dinner
*taps microphone
Test, 3, 2, 1. Test, 3, 2, 1.
oooo will you be singing??
Umm… I think u not du so gud on ur kownting test….. U got awl deh numberz rite, but dey awl b bakkerdz….. it b 1, 2, 3. But u gitz an F fer Fertz!!
::big smilee fais::
Can I haz sleepeh babbeh kitteh if I particimipate in teh competition? oh please oh please!
Whew! I jest gotz bak fum Staplols (ware I hadda buy staplols of awl tings) and I almos mist teh re hearse lol. Issit too lait? I has teh trompet dat muh son stashed in muh attic (“just fer a liddlol whyle dad” he sez). I kin make moosic wif dat, I gotz brass an I’se a horny kinda guy. I kin make the horn go “BLATT!” and I kin make it go “BLEET!” and sumtimes it goes “Skronk!” awl by itsef whylst I’m honking fer a differment toan. Is fun an easy too, you just do lyke Lauren Bakkal sed and it werx.
nope, not too layte! awdishuns are starting on teh next LOL, prolly to go on all day if tehr are enuff peeples hoo com in later!
yoo noes how to whissle rite? jus put ur lips togevver an blow…
Whew! Nawt too layte! Gud! *KCT cums in streaming clothes dat r britely colored and filmy* *Gets floot owt and warms up* Today ai sings and plais da floot. Ai shall plai sumfing classical and sumfing fer Kris Maus. Ai will plai “Hungarian Serenade” and “O Holy Night.” *starts playing floot for audition* *lubberly sownds fill the air* As a finale, ai will sing mai Fadder’s only Kris Maus carol he ebber taut meh. *KCT sings to “Deck the Hall*
Deck us all wif Boston Charlie
Walla Walla Wash and Kalamazoo.
Nora’s freezin awn teh trolley,
Waller dollar cauliflower and alley garoo!
*KCT bows and wabes to awl her peeps and cheezfrens*
Whew! That wuz harder dan ai thot!
LCB! Didja lieks it! See! Ai haz talint!
wut hapnd tu poor kitteh?
it should be ‘Teh ultimit eye pach’
(\_/)
(^^) Oh! Funny! I love it!
(><) I give you A+++!!!!!
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i has a doggy and a kitty. my kitty went to sleep on my doggy too. not nearly as cute as that though. hes one awesome dog. he deserves dozens of doggy treats after this.
*sigh* OK!! Doing a dubblol peauxt heer. Ai hoepd it wus sheau up – bu seau far, nuthing. Teh MINNIT ai doo it it will be heer, ai kneau!!
.
GP – did yoo see this wun??? Ai thot it wuz teh three ov yoo praktissing wif yur direktor maybee. Oar – izzat lcb??
icanhascheezburger.com/2008/12/11/funny-pictures-dam-sekuritee-camraz/