Is too a squeaky toy!

Is too a squeaky toy! Listen when I squeeze it!
noep. i definitely nawt a squeezy toy.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: Winnie-Wonka
« Previous vortex kitteh | Bureaucrat kitteh is caught Next »

Is too a squeaky toy! Listen when I squeeze it!
noep. i definitely nawt a squeezy toy.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: Winnie-Wonka
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.

Ai sweez, it skweekz.
concatulashuns awn ur nawt sekond annipuss! ai iz stil tew ful fer danses (mai massive ober-eetin yesterdai, let meh sho u it!) butt haow bout sum nyce turkee & cramberri sause sammiches er sum pi er sum cukkees?
FangQ BF, dats berry gud uv u, Ai fing a cukkee wud be juss rite fur an affernoon snak.
Surly u must bee online alldeey
Not reelee, Ai dip in an owt. Ai aer retyred an slitelee disabulled, so Ai haz plentee uv tiem 2 plai.
Lolcats iz nawt play. Iz seerius wurk. Teh Ceeling Cat sez sew. Naw, awl I havva du iz purrswade my bosses ob it.
AWWWWWWWW! Tu QTE!!!
spalt argh
awwwwwwwwwww nooooooooez it gonna happun, wuz tu farst foar meee haaalpzzz *SPLORTZ*
O noze!! *whoop whoop whoop* heer cums de CCC!
sweepity ur braynes inno a nyce tydee pyle
rinsity wif sparkly wadder wif a hint uv lemonz
patty pat dri wif nyc softee towell
tuckity bak inno braynium cabity
snapity awn eggstra strenff CHRG wif drawings uv bunnies awn it
wrappity wif duk taype uv mannee rainbo cullers
snuggly u inno a floofy cheezfrends map blankie
offerity trai uv hawt chokklit, turkee sammiches & sordid pastrees
kay, jus rest fer a minit & doan luk at de kittehs fer a while!
Oh, deer, heer cumz te CCC
*sweep up SS,s branes an rinse dem wiv spring water*
*pakk dem bakk in herz hedd an replaes hed bonez*
*fassen wiv dukky taep (dekuratid wiv muzik noets)*
*snap awn a nyoo CHRGwdo*
*Leed SS to teh splort recubbery lownj and wrap her inna floofy cheezpeepl map blankie an gib her sum hawt choklit an a choklitt possum*
Dere, rest a while an doan’t luk at teh pikchoor wivout ur purrtektib gogglez.
dubble reskew maiks u feel twict as gud! woot!
Sertinlee shud be otay naow!
mennimenni thxez foar wunnermus reskew! aiz better dan kneew naow! impruved smerf, let me sho yu it!111111!!!
{{{{{{{{{{{{bluesfan & annipuss}}}}}}}}}}}}}
ai haz tew goe owt naow (blarg) & braive de shawppin crowdz. *putz awn crash helmet, spyked elbo pads fer nudgin folkses owt uv mai wai & shyn gards* Haz a gud dai cheezfrendz!
Gud lukk BF! Ai haz a pyle un irnin 2 do. Warez a YNG wen u need wun!
*hmms. Iffen soprano_surf haz two braynes naw, wuz iz teh sekkond*
LOL aifinkz mai wun brayne just be speshully kleen an taideh (o loooks!!!11 findz stuff datz bene lawst foar elebenteh daze) an mebbe ai wont get da dreddid braynefreez agin foar a whail
de cayuutest skweeky toi eber! butt luuk owt fer de poyntee ends!
Allas not gud sweeky toi for teh baf.
Unlessn you wants to see teh poyntee ends up close…
I bleev deh pointy endz r awlreddy kumming owt!! Just lukking at dat liddlol rite frunt paw!!
cween! you’re back!
{{{{{{{cweenmj}}}}}}}
I iz nawt bein’ too ruff wid teh bebbeh!
Him lieks bein skweezd!
dat iz de sweetist lil faice! Gud fing ai had mai CHRG & HGGs awn! ai luuk gud tew, hee hee! luckee nowun iz heer 2 see!
yes, CHRG berry nessesiry!
{{{{moe}}}} Stay safe, deer moe.
[[[[moe]]]] <– armor plated hugs.
heya nc66, nice one. diggin’ the AP-hugs.
LOL @ armor plated hugs. Thanks for the good wishes, all. And the laughs, too — it has been difficult to remember how to do that.
.
The first person to make me smile was actually a kitteh. One of the attacks that began on Wednesday night was outside my office building. The terrorists tried to enter the building, too, so it was locked up all night, with about 80-100 of us inside. Around midnight, I went up to the seventh-floor cafeteria, and who should be running around but the Koko, the skinny stray cat I sometimes feed down in the street, where the terrorists had been shooting that night. Koko in her wisdom found not only safety but also plenty of noms in our cafeteria. Seeing her made me smile on a night when it was very difficult to do so. Just thought I’d share that story.
Dat b a smart kitteh!! I’m so glad u kin smile,
even in deh bad tiymez. Wif awl deh gud nomz she b habbing a gud time, ifinkso.
[[[moe]]] I borrow deh AP hugz.
Dat such a gud idea, NC66.
Nono, ais just a big hugger.
*shifty eyes*
Iz mai Itteh Bitteh Kitteh. Ah lubz him & hugz him & hugz him & lubz him & kawlz him Jorj! U nawt habbin him!
Basement cat get a new recruit
don’t take dis innocent bebbeh
*shivvr*
Rosemary’s baby flashbak
o noooooo! sweet bebeh, dew nawt turn tew de dark syde!
“Basement cat get a new recruit”
Ai wuz worrit aboat dat. Teh innasent wons r @ turrbul risk. Srsly. Hao minny cheezburgerz duz Ceiling Cat ask 4 2 du reskue? Ai haz plenny cheez in frij, but -0- burgerz.
Wee gots 2 save taht beebee tabbeh kitteh! (Aftur cleanin up alla teh *Splortz* aroun hear!)
squeeeling and pointy ends and flying fer in 3, 2, 1 …
“I’m not touching you… I’m not touching you….”
LOL! flashbak tu mah bruvvers!
Basement cat being eeeevil.
Teenee Tinee Bebbeh jes liek tuu snourgle; adn ar duuyeing a guud jawb ovvit!!
(Her figgers iyf her sleaps veree cloase tuu Midnite Kitteh her wil be saife frum awl tohse Blak Friedegg shauppers taht bees oaver-runnyng teh plaise:
Noeboddee bees saife!!!)
is mah nu babbeh brudda. u no can hab him.
babbeh brudda sayz GEROFFME!!!!1!
As long as his eyes dont pop out too far, it’s okay, rite?
Riteโฝ
yes, iz okai az lawng az teh eyez dont pop out 2 veri far. aifink teh pointee endz popz owt b4 teh eyez az xtra safe tee meashur
Plz tew nawt be skweezin teh bebbeh tew hard, kitteh!
pfft… issa eempostur, aifinkso… lemme see…
.
* breeves in awl teh air inna ruum *
.
* twitches littlol ears *
.
* WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK WEEEEEEK WEEEEEK *
.
amachur, kitteh… amachur.
*Pounses on deh Guinness Piggeh just tu heer him skweek agin*
* WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK *
*Rollz over on bak and kuverz eerz wif pawz*
ohai cweenmj! iz ur porblemz wif viewin ur profyle & awl gittin straitined owt?
OhHai, I kin seeing mai profile. Cannot seeing deh pagez 2 thru last uv mai frenz oar messigez, etc. Adn I kin seeing sum ov mai frenz profilez.
::smilee fais::
Oh dear, that’s too bad! I sent you a message this morning, could you see that one?
Yup. I kin seeing page wun uv deh messigez. adn if I log owt, I kin seeing everything. Itz just wen I b logged in dat thingz go wakky. berry strainge.
Oh, Hugh? If deh norf Atlantic b gitting tew cold, I kud moving ur marker further souf. Dere b sum luvlee eyelandz in deh Caribean whre u kud hanging owt.
That sounds lovely! It is getting rather cold and today it’s pouring
rain, which is making me sad. Thank you!
Frew deh majikz uv deh internetz, u now b enjoying deh balmy tropical breezez adn sunshine uv St. Kittz. Schmoo!!
Oh, ai wish it wuz dat eezee IRL!!! Iz cowld, grey n slushee heer todai.
Well, I guess a little improvement is better than no improvement at all. *shmoos* my friend!
.
*swims off muttering to self*
whattheheckarethesepeopledoingtoourbelovedcween,notlettingherseeallhermillionsoffriendsandmessagesthatsjustnotright!heyplanktonyum!
Itz not just mii. Prysma kitteh cant seeing hur profile at awl. And I spect dere b uzzerz wif deh same afflikshun.
* lukks up at kitteh *
.
Ahem. iffn yu nawt want tu be def, plz tu nawt be pownsing onna lolpigs tu see iffn dey wheel squeek! fankies.
*gently pokez nose uv deh Guinness Piggeh wif paw*
Sry. Wuz kitteh reflex.
* points “Plz tu NAWT Hedbat” T-Shurt *
Sry, GP reflex…
.
* jumps awn cweenmj adn rolls arownd fluur *
*Purrz adn tail twitchez*
I b glad tu seeing u, GP!
{{{{cweenmj}}}} plz tu NAWT be leebing anee moar!
.
* twitches whiskers adn chase chase chase kitteh arownd *
*run, run, screech tu stop!
Doan wurry. I never kud leev fur gud. I wuz just habbing a kumputter induced irritashun. but mai time-owt b over now.
YAY!
.
* whips out majikal floofy prezunt sack *
.
* pulls out 2 glasses, a large bottlol ob chokklit martoonie mix, a bag ob cherry filled chokklit possums adn a shinee shinee gnu tee-arr-ah *
Fankee!!
nom sip nom nom sip som nip sim pom
Turkeh Leg? dere wus plenny left obers at LCB’s eben affer Mick adn teh otters had dere fill…
They laffed when I cross-breeded teh turkeys wif teh millipedes, but we had drumstix a-go-go yesterday!
Only hard part was catching teh turkeys. Boy, can they run fast wif all those legs.
* fawls off chare lolling *
.
* jumps awn LCB *
*flings GP over sholder, judo-style*
I is lissening to my lolPod on “shuffle” at teh moment. Out of over 8,000 songs, whut does it play? Hmmm?
“Candlol in teh Wind”, that’s whut.
Iz deh Drumstixx-A-Go-Go a gnu band?
.
.
.
.
Oar a wildebeest band??
Would u bleev… springbok & roll?
ibex itz de bes band inna whirrled!
*heddesk*
Eeeeeeps! Dat hurtz! D8
Iz bebbeh kitteh’s naym Charmin?
wear iz mr whiipul wen wii needz him?
Himz iz splorted in teh TeePee aisle.
Ohai, WRr!
How goes the building progress? Did you get your water line problem fixed? Is the hole dug?
Can’t . . . stand . . . cuteness . . .
Must . . . avert . . . eyes . . . and think . . . of . . . in-laws . . .
SPLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORT!
O no, rattipuss splorted wiff no wun tew hep awl dis tyme!
O noze!! *whoop whoop whoop* heer cums de CCC!
sweepity ur braynes inno a nyce tydee pyle
rinsity wif sparkly wadder wif a hint uv razzberri
patty pat dri wif nyc softee towell
tuckity bak inno braynium cabity
snapity awn eggstra strenff CHRG wif drawings uv pandas awn it
wrappity wif duk taype uv mannee rainbo cullers
snuggly u inno a floofy cheezfrends map blankie
offerity trai uv hawt chokklit, turkee sammiches & sordid pastrees
r u otay rattipuss? speek tew meh!
tri finkin uv de crowded stoars, dat wuz enuff tew stawp mai braynes frum splodin! It wuz wylde todai, even mai spikey elbo pads wer nawt enuff tew maik folks git owt uv de wai! ai onlee wen tew 2 stoars & den sed to hek wif dis!
Oh, fank u! Fank u, bloosfan. Ah wuz so tramma– trumi– traumat– skeert dat Ah cuddn ansers fer a whyl.
Fanks fer awl teh gushy fuds, speshully da sordid pastrees. Dems gud noms.
Wut? U meen my neece not like bein the livin akkordeyon?
We sed “Play *wif* teh bebbeh!” Not “Play teh bebbeh!”
Mama’s got a skweezebawzx, daddy neber sleepz at nite! hee hee!eerwurm!
I was thinking of that song 2, BF473! I might has to play “Candlol in teh Wind” again to git it outta my eers.
ai cannawt seem to get ch-ch-ch-changes owt uv mai hed…
How we suffer for our arts.
Tew bad fur midnight kitteh. Tiger kitteh’s squeak nawt come from mouf end.
Squeeze awl yew want midnight kitteh. Gassy kitteh still full frum fanksgibink.
*Dew ai smell brussel sprouts?*
eewww..
dubble eeewwwwww…
wut happen tew ur abatar nc66? u luukin lyke a ghostie dere
(i aksded him taht wunse. dis iz himz lurksum mode. him iz not reely heer.
)
dat a screechy toy akshully.
an it haz sharp teefs an pointy enz!
izza screechy an skritchy toi
ai will lubs himz
*splort*
n hugz himz
*splert*
n callz himz jorge
*fallz ober mostly ded frum teh kyoot*
it wuz wurf it…
Egcilinnt. Squeak
Anso, to do teh Hym-lick manoovr, u clasp bof pawz togevver on teh stummick. If teh viktim still cannot breef, use teh paws 2 mayk teh upword thrustin inno teh diaffram, 4 or 5 times, until teh stuck-in-throat thing pops owt and tey can have the breaffin agin.
Gaah! tu much kitten in one pikshur!
*splort*
This id the sound…
*squeeze*
Meeeeeeeeee
*unsqueeze*
Owwwwwww
,seeeee?????
Sound maks senss.
Hoooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwww freeken KUTE iz dat?????? Gittin totelee kuted owt heer……….hazz mursey on ussssss preshussssssssssssssss………..
thiz is so so so so so so so cute
OMG! I do that to my kitty ALL THE TIME, LOL! I announce – “see, he even has extra added value features, you can operate him as a squeaky toy” and give him a quick squeeze, which invariably yields an annoyed squizzle out of kitteh. Never fails to crack me the hell up. And since kitty doesn’t give any sign of wanting to jump off my lap, the demonstration obviously doesn’t bother him very much either. Win-Win
it’s a pedo cat!!!
oh ones black and ones striped (smiles)
Thats good.
OMG this is ssssssooooooo funny
i loves it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That is bad for that kitty to be squeezed.