As the humans unexpectedly entered,
As the humans unexpectedly entered, Lettie froze, and tried to look as ornamental as possible.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: ganwil
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Cheezburger Network Blog
Ooo shinee!
Congrats, Audra awn ur nawt sekund. Wat wud u liek fur sillybrayshuns?
Congo Rats Ululations Audra! shineeee ornimintz an meddles foar yu tu!
tank yoo to anni and smurf. in honoor ov dis jolly pic, ai think we shood practis our catmas caroles, adn dans round da tree!
horrrk deh hair-eh ayn-dgullz siih-iingz.
glaw-reh tooo dah noo-bonreded kinnnnnnnnnnnnnngzzzzzz!
ai doan nows haow tu maik dem liddul muzikknotez on ICHC, eben do dey b mai perfeshun in groan-upp laifz..
mewsik noatz & # 9835; wif no spaisez
♫
sighzzz..dinna wurk 4 meh..
&39835;
♫
u gotta dew da ; part at de end too!
or, has u tried alt 13? ♪
u has to use teh number keypad.
Ai absolootlee rifyooze to sing carolez b4 adbent Sundai! Dat iz dis kummin Sundai – affer dat Ai wull prolly sing dem awl dai!
“Songy fairwurkzez”: FTW!!!!!!!!
okai. how bout..
annipuss and audra allwayz avoid anoyeeng anthems afore adbnet?
Amayzin alliteraytib anser!
yesh, we need a lil Christmas
rite dis berry minuet bekuz dey just don’t start erllee enufs!
ai werk in dah retayl bussiness.. it start eerlee enuff fer meh!
Rite!
santa’s alreddy bin at owr mall for two weeks.
Iz catmaz tyme!
She’z a berry prittee ornimint
Wib green lazurs!
naut eezi wen yoo r soo bewteefull!!!
I dun see a kitteh… ?
heh!
Congaratshoelaces awn teh tawp spawt, Audra!!
Wut yu wuntz fur drinkee? Heer….(splat, clink) it beez aftur 5 o’crock heer.
Hazza martoonie!! An Iscream martoonie, how’s dat?
YAY!
Ohai, turtlol!
Iz teh Harlee put away foar teh wintur? Iz been awfully cold heer alreddy. Gettin in cold car bad enuf, I kant imadjin ridin innit! **shivvurs at teh thot**
depends upon yer riding gear.
Riding gear? **heads to NB**
Do I wanna know what kind of riding gear you’re talking about?
cold weather gear for the motorcycle, in addition to usual chaps, jacket, helmet, boots.
Spurs an chaps, perhaps?
no spurs, they get caught up inna foot-pegs.
..an teh cubbers…
*raised eyebrow*
…oar sew I’ve heard….yesh, that’s it! I HEARD that!
still waiting for an explaination of leather sheets.
Um……..um……
.
.
.
Oh look, a chicken!
Saonds liek mai bufflolo bed spreads.
Nao I has “Indian Outlaw” in my hed…
Dat splains da lethur sheets…
I nawt say nuffin abowt dat. **zips lips**
Teh line frum Indian Outlaw “nuthin but my buffalol breefs” iz wat popped in2 my hed.
{{{{{rhsb}}}}} yu iz getting intu da ranj ub un daykorus dere. du nawt maik me hab tu send yu tu nb. (just goze if yu wantz)
Dan, I am SO glad to know you wear a helmet!
Turtlol an I were discussing helmets recently and we seem to agree on the subject.
In KY, you do not has to wear helmet. But if ur in car, u hasta ware seat belt no mattur ifn u drivin oar nawt. Stoopy, huh?
U nawt wear brayne bukkit we cawls U organ donor inna amblance.
when peeps look at me oddly about the cost of a helmet I ask them “How much is YOUR head worth?”
Gud anser!
I rode motorsykle wunse. Previus boifren took me foar ride rownd teh parkin lot. I wanted to ride moar, but him sed, “No helmet, no ride”.
gud for him!
If I’d gone withowt a helmet in colleg I’d be missin haf my fase right now.
yup, gots to portekt taht brayn. tehy kan transplant just abowt anyfing else, but not a noo brayn.
i has hearding ub teh heatedz handy gripings. Electric bootz an a mohair suit… ya noes i read it ina magascene…
Elton John ref, FTW!
Wun ov may formur nayburs wuz Benny Jett. Thot ov dat sawng EBERY tiem I saw him! Came in handee when I tryed to remember his naem.
*holds hed* ai heers lectric moosik, solid wall ub sound!
U prefer teh banjers?
Oar teh baggie pipes?
*eers perk up*
Hao bowt Foggee Mowntin Brakedown?
How bout sum Steve Earl? *kiks bak, waits*
Hao bout some cripple creek?
Up on Cripple Creek she sends me
If I spring a leak she mends me
I don’t have to speak she defends me
A drunkard’s dream if I ever did see one
Oh, yesh!
I learned noo frase, “creek gypsy”. Nawt shure wat it iz, but nawt sown lyk complimint.
*ahhh* Wen ai git off dis mountin, tell yu wat ai gonna go…strate down da mississippi riber tu da gulf ub mexico…WIN!!
Hay, WRr, jes curious, you noes Dixie Chicken by Littlol Feat? One ub mai favrits!
googlol sez iz teh winery. Nawt soundz too bad.
Nawt inna kontext it wuz yoozed ware I heerd it.
Wen sumwun saw a pikshur ov sumwun eles, dey sed purson in pikshur luuked lyk creek gypsy.
Must be a Kentucky thang.
would folks who bivouac in creeks…..
…
If youll be my Dixie chicken ill be your cheezland lamb
And we can walk together down in Dixieland
Down in Dixieland
…
Y’all nawt beleev wut I been lissenin tew 2day.
Old Bluegrass and new Nickelback.
My eclectick tayse in moosick, let me show u it!
Ding Dong, Dan!
I’ve been called a ding-a-ling before, but this is a new way to do it I suppose.
Nope nawt callin u a ding dong. U has messidj.
Oh, yesh, WRr, yoo always come throo! I see da brite lights ub Memphis rite nao, an da commadore hotel!! *clinkee beer bottles wif WRr*
ai luff da Feat! wuz bes wiff Lowell George doh.
FTW.
ohai, nope, teh Harleys await nize daze. Ai tries tu ride ebbery Jan 1st, unless dere bees sno n ize. Ai has lethers, lawng jawns, glubs, butes, full-faze halmit, ana winsheeld. If itz below 45, tho, Ai is chikkin. Tu cowld fur me den!
Dat win chil faktor? It be MUSH werse awna byke…brrrrrr…….
but awn warm wintree daze, Ai will be owt dere…..
ooo iscream martoonie sounds trey nom!
*slurpity slurpity*
*hiccup* moor plees?
hey fat-man, drop the bag and step away from mai nip-mousie!!!
SHD, ai wuz gonna warn yoo nawt too luk at dis one!!!
I tried too, KK.
Figgered his hed wud asplode, an nawt teh gud kinda asplode (lyk frum teh kyoot).
*whispers* nawt menshun camels…okais?
Yup, I kno dat.
I smartur tahn I luuk, fanks CC.
nawt menshun camels?
yew meens camels like this?
http://www.yogatravel.co.uk/images/camels%20-%20camel.jpg
.
or maybe camels like these:
.
http://www.fohn.net/camel-pictures-facts/the-pictures/Bactrian-Camels.jpg
.
in fact, ai has an idea. Since our good frend stagehanddan lubs teh camels so much, we shud all tell him storees about camels and post picshurs of camels everytime we sees him. Yep, ai finkso.
I fink I sit dis wun owt. Dont finkso I wanna be awn himz angree syde!
Pd’B, yu r just so deliciously ebil here….
an I bet he cud even manag teh brane transplant….
with Igor’s halp, of corse.
Ai put U onna lizst!
Nawt teh niec list eiddur
I nawt onnit ether, an I hazza PROWD!
** Start playing Dante Symfonee. **
picture this:
Santa with a little girl (or not so little girl *leering grin*) on his lap.
The little girl has a one finger on her chin, and is asking Santa to “Define Good”.
Hai! When did you see me do that?!?!
I thot nobodee wuz luukin…
Howld up Sandy claws union card.
We doan keep teh seegrets frum each udder.
Oh noes.
HOW menny peeplol saw dat? Iz awn YooToob sumwares?
Haz tu bee a Sandy Claws tu see dat. An nawt teh mall Sandy but teh orphan adn sic kitteh inna hospitalz Sandy Claws
Ooooh, nawt so shur yoo shuld beh santa dis yeer!! Akshelly, wen ai wuz liddlol girl, ai fink ai had, um, impaired santa. Ai gets on lap, den he sez ai wuz nawt gud girl dis yeer!! Wuz at Sears…back in 60’s. Stoopy santa, cuz, trooly, ai kikd awl stuff in mai room unner mai bed so dat ai culd tell mom dat ai wuz gud dis yeer. *grumbles, stoopy impaired santa!*
Sownds liek Vargas, or Arno? Or is it a SHD original?
well, it was described in an Anita Blake book. Anita had it on a coffee cup to annoy the business manager. and, I’m sure to no-ones suprise here, I fell in love with that cup.
My letter to Santa this year will start, “Dear Santa, Let me explain…”
Nawt needz tu ’splain. Wii noes iz Stoopie ex’s fault.
Speekin ov teh debil….I saw my lolyer tihs afturnoon.
Wii discussed cowntering himz settlolment offur.
I iz finalee mad at him. Nawt want him bak enny moar.
Gud! Yu can duing better than him! {{{{{rhsb}}}}}
Lolyer say yu can haz bigger settlolmint cownter-offur?
Yup.
Fanks, p-k. I mebbe need tew has teh rabid weazuls on retaynur, in kase sumpfink goez rong.
Oh, an I thot of tehm today! I heer, “Dirtee deeds an dere dun dirt cheep, Dirtee deeds an dere dun dirt cheep.”
Tehm be around tu nom pleh ex if yu needing. Taht be gud theem song fur teh weezuls!
Ai glad yu be angrees nao. Yu shud be angree when sumwun trai tu hurting yu fur own selfishnesses! Ex be bad purson, duing tese fings tu yu!
.
Ai nawt be around rest uv nite… lyk ai sed, had pleh day n bad nus. BF say him moar tahn happeh fur us tu folding owt teh footon-coch n watch teh fabrit moobies an cuddlol teh kittehs, so ai gunna duz taht. Ai see ebrywun (whu nawt be duing Fangsgibbon stuffs) inna moarning. {{{{{cheezfrenz}}}}}
P-k, ifn you wanna talk, u can emayo me.
Sorry to heer u gotted bad noos. {{{p-k}}}
Feels beddur, {{{pk}}} hab restful nite wif kittehs an old moobies!
{{rhsb}} I hopes dis wurks out gud fur you…jes frum mai sperience, iz more empowering tu be mad….sumtimes. Schmoo tu yu.
Fanks, KK.
My famlee has a prowd dat I’m finalee mad. Better laet tahn nebber huh?
Iz jest bedder fur yur hart…awl da way round!! Mad bedder den sad, an sumtimes gits moar results. {{rhsb}} ai bin der, stay mad, nawt tu be sad!!
Mai eyez haw dey twinkl !!! 11 !!
Hooman sayz, “Hunee, ai dun’t mebenber putzing a kitteh ormanet onna tree.”
*dans dans dans*
lotsa shinee nu toys!
I can has dis kitteh foar prezzie?
but it’s still November?
Purr-zacklee! Still nawt FanksGibbin yet.
NO KRISSMISS STUFF YET!
Bah, Humbug!
If onlee! Ai iz just home from nawt-sekkund Crissmus consert of dis year! Yes, iz onlee November but duz dat stop it??
nebber too early for catmas prezzie!
Not in da retayl wurld!!
Tihs reminz me ov a card I saw teh uthur day. It had kitteh awn it an sed, “O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree, Your ornaments are history”
@@@@@ FTW!!
SNERT
‘cept for my littol black kitteh. She used the tree as cover for pouncing on the older one…
Josie lyked tew luuk at teh lites.
Peggy jest lyked hangin owt unner teh tree. Thot hur wuz prezzie tew!
Tehn afture teh hoomans fynolly leftid teh rume, kitteh wentid bak tuu battyng teh Christmas baulls wif an ebil glee; her rlly hadded teh tiem ov hers lief!!!!
Ifn I caint seez dem
Dey caint seez me!
Oh…….hai….U prollee wunnerin wut I’z doin…..
OHMAIGAWSH LOOKEE OVER DERE!!! IZ SANDEE KLAWS!!!!
*run under bed*
Hapee cwismaz every cheezpeeps!
Mai grandpa frum Texas, he wuld tell us dat if we heers santa claus at nite, an we gits out ub bed, dat santa claus wuld spit tobacco juice in ar eyes! I nebber thot dat wuz weird, til ai tol peeps about it…but we nebber gawt out ub bed!!
lol
mebbe dat santa claws wus akshully ur granpapa~
Grandpa pretty sly one!! He 94 now, ai goes tu see him dis yeer fur chrismis. We nebber fot nuffin bout it, den wen ai older ai tells peeple, and dey fink is horrible fing tu say!! Aifinks pretty funee, maisalf.
Mai, wats BEEEYUTIPUL ornaminz u haz own ur tree!!
Teh bird, teh kitteh, and teh goggie, dat’s hao dey went up the Chris Maus tree! Rly! Menny yeers ago, we hed a parakeet who gawt loose and went to teh tawp of the tree, teh kitteh saw teh bird and climbed teh tree and the goggie finking dis is awl rong, tried to go up teh tree too. Tree fell. Troo Storee. Srsly.
*doubtful* u suer u nawt takin dis storee form teh slyvester and tweedy katoon??
Absolutely PAWSITIVE erik teh lolcat! The birdie wuz naymed Tweety but teh resemblance stawps dere. Tigger wuz teh cat and Inky wuz the goggie. We’d let the bird fly sumtiems to get exercise but the kitteh and goggie gawts in and dat’s teh truf….teh hole truf! *swears on CC’s kibble*
@@@@@ Snert
Fanks, maeks gud mynds eie moobie
Oh hai, KCT, dis happen tu meh once, had 3 kittehs, dey chasin eachudder round da house, one kitteh clime awl da way up da middel ub tree, ebbryfing falls down!
Sum yeers ago ai hadz teh opper tune itee to purr chis a cast eye-urn tree stand. Awmos borked brudders bak wens he finks he b pikin up teh lite wayt tree stand – mus way bowt 20 powns. No mownts ob kittehs or goggees cans tip teh tree ober! Noes, ai noe sell its to NE buddee!!!
This is why I don’t have a Christmas tree.
wut? no wai! wheres ur chirstmas speerit?
iz so nawt fun without teh tree
Had furst tree in yeers last yeer and kittehs (whew!) did NAWT climb!
lets see… wut shal ai dekorate on muh cheezburgertree…
hmmm.. anee suggeshuns?
Arctic salmons?
Baloney?
Catsup??
D…
Deli salamis
Eggnogs wif xtra rum
Frankenfooters
Gorganzola cheez
Ham sammiches
I…
isecreme comez
jujubez
kissez, chonklit
liddul sawsijz
makurunez
n…….
nudelees
orinjs r nots poysin
purpul peepul eeters
Q – cumberz
R…
Incandescent candies
Jellies, jellies, jellies,
Kreme cheez,
Lawtsa meets: turkey, beefies, hammies, (so, ai’m a carnivore..)
Moar meets and cheez
N…
Nogs (egg) tu drinks wif it
Onyuns
Pepperoni cheez
…
Qwestionable comments
Rastafarians
String cheese
Tittaliting stories
U….
Unusually larj lasagnas
Various vittles
Xsepshinallee xcellent eels
Y…
Yinkle yankles
and
Zoo lolanimals krackers!!
Hooray! Now iz liek tew share it wif all muh cheezy fwens on ICHC!
Merry Cheesmaus evelybodi!!
Since wii r heded into teh Chris Maus seeson and fankies to “Pogo,” ai’d liek to sing dis sawng. *cleers froat and hmms a few bars* *drinksies at a few bars too* *sung to deck the halls*
“Deck us awl wif Boston Charlie,
Walla walla wash and Kalamazoo!
Nora’s freezin awn da trolly,
Waller dollar cauliflower and alley garoo!”
Ownly Chris Maus Carol mai daddy tot me. Yep.
Dont we no archaic barrel ( oh, dang, ai furgetz da rest)&39835;
ooops! ♫
how bout
“jingle bells, goggies smell…”
*scratches head*
pleh work made me forget the rest
Gawta goes nao…..werks ober. Sigh. *Yawns hoojly* Ai sleepy. Nite nitey! Sumbuddy tayke meh hoem…….*yawns moar and moar* ZZZZZZzzzzzZZZZZZZ
MAY I HAZ UR ATTENSHUN PLZ?
.
.
Tew sillybrate teh famlee bein gone foar a fue dayz, I wud lyk tew inbite eberywun tew a partee at my howse!
.
.
Fuds, bevridjes an musick will be provided.
.
.
Nawt responsiblol foar enny pursonal injuries oar damidj oar loss ov pursonal properties.
Oops, forgotted sum stuffs.
.
.
Party will begin tomorrow ebenin wen I get hoam an last until sumetime awn Caturday afternoon. (I hasta has tiem tew get rids ov teh ebidense.)
.
.
Partee moozics. Mai olde sckewl rock let me show u it.
Two,three,four!
In-a-gadda-da-vida honey,
don’tcha know that I love you?
In-a-gadda-da-vida baby,
don’tcha know that I’ll always be true?
….
OMCC.
Dat IZ teh olde!
My inner-hed-bangur has been owt latelee. Hur halps me get thro teh moar diffycult parts ov lyf by lissenin tew teh rok-an-role. Plus, wen dere nawt makin me lissen tew teh Krissmiss musick, wii lissen tew rock stayshun onna radio. (zrock103.com ifn you wanna heer it)
U kno wat brakes my hart? Heerin sawngs I lissend tew in ohai skool an tehn realyzin IZ ONNA OLDEES STAYSHUN!
Made me wanna go get teh rockin chayre an afghan.
Wut brakes my hart isz seein toyses ai had mai childhud in teh ANTEEK STORE!
Lets me git mai cane adn by-focals, den ai’ll joyn yew.
An I nawt dat OLDE ethur!
I gradumatated frum ohai skool in ‘85.
Hunnee, yew iz a babee compaired tew me! Ai gradumatated frum ohai skool in ‘77.
My elementaree skool iz nao anteek mawl.
Troo storee: Mahm, SIL an I went tew yard sale. I saw stereo wif 8-trak player onnit. Wen I sed, “Ooh, iz gotta 8-trak”, SIL sed “Wats 8-trak?” Hur iz yunger but nawt by DAT musch!
Nao, ware did I put my Ben Gay, proons, an orthopedik shoos?
I have a car with an aftermarket 8-track player.
What kind of car?
I grew up listening to my uncle’s 8-tracks. Fifth Dimension, Eagles, Bread, CCR, etc.
He had a very strong influence on my musical likes.
would you believe a 1967 Morris Mini Minor automatic?
Coming from you, I’d believe anything.
**gotta go look an see what it looks like**
My favorite car was 1964 Rambler. Belonged to boifren. Wuz teh color ov ur quilt skware.
Dan! It’s adorable!
Aren’t you tall-ish? How do you fit innit?
Iz old as I am.
there is room for four people of my height in that car, and it is as old as I as well.
Relee? Foar sum reesun I thot u wuz younger.
Wen ur birfday?
early Feb. and that is all anybody who wasn’t there gets. Well the Secret Service demanded the actual date, but they carry automatic weapons.
Sew, I onlee 2-3 weeks older tahn u.
Why you nawt tell day? Afraid we’ll all show up at your door?
my birthday hasn’t been anything but another day in my sentence since about 15 or so. I just soldier on and get through it.
and we can taunt u wif camel jokes until u spill….
*malishus grin*
uh-huh, izzat how it’s gonna be?
U r bof youngsters yet. Ai wuz borned Saem day as princess Di.
**tries to think of gud response**
Well, ifn u wanna talk about it, you know how to find me.
I thot u liked being teesed!
Or woz that flogged?
Dats nawt old, WRr.
Ohai, Leeza!
**rhsb raises eyebrow**
ohai rhsb!
I was glad u finally splained ur name the other day, I had always wondered!
And Dan, we can leeve off teh teasin if u REALLY want us to.
We CUD just pik a random day in teh furst half of Fed and declare it ur burfday. And we will sing to u and give u birfdai schmoos. If u show up. How’s teh 4th looking?
Or if u really don’t want us to do anyfing, really, really, I’ll respeckt ur wishez. But u mite like havin a burfday here… even if not IRL. *skwink*
I explayned it befoar, but wuz menne monfs ago.
My 1-yeer anniversaree here is coming soon! January 2nd!
I can’t beleev iz onlee been 1 yeer. I feel lyk I knowed u gues forebber!
Luk next tu teh Geritol adn support hose.
Izza nawt sekkund liev concert ai went tu. Iron Butterfly was warm up band…doan member who was main draw(was told it was Stewart) main band booed offa stage cause iron butterfly was the WIN.
Mai parrintz let me go tew a Rolling Stones concert wif a frend wen ai wus 13. Mai dad dropt us awf cuz we cudn’t draiv yet.
I wanted to see Prince in his “Purple Rain” days, but parents said nope.
Mai parrintz sent me to a relijus school, but had NOOOO idea abowt teh Stones. (Maybee thay thot teh name wuz a relijus refferens?) Eben teh wild boy at school cudn’t go — HIS parents said nope.
My furst real consert was… John Denver.
ack!! mine too!! i wuz 14 or 15
*swinks*
Back tehn, he was teh BIG deal!!
Mai furst consert: The Who, inna small club in Toronto. Ai wuz 15. WIN WIN WIN!!!
i seed teh poleese wif teh gogos in abowt 1981. mebbee 82. (my boyfrend, now hubby, hadn’t gradjumated frum kollij yet, him gradjumated in 83, me in 84)gud show. we also seed thomas dolby, an bob dylan, an frank zappa, an prolly also sum ovver shows that i duznt rebember bekawz i iz old an loozin my mind.
Nawt-seckund consert I went tew? Statler Brudders. Wif famlee.
I has seen Def Leppard 3 tymes, Merle Haggard wunse an Johnny Cash an Carter famlee yeers ago.
Also saw Billy Joel & Elto John, Eric Clapton “Unplugged”, Teri Clark, and Kenny Chesney.
Almost saw Sawyer Brown and John Michael Montgomery (local guy gone famous), but plans got changed.
Lots of bands goes to sturgis ebery year so we getz luckee and can haz sum gud moozics at least wun tiyme a year.
When Ai wuz young we lived an hour frum Chicago adn mai parents luvved teh opera and ballet. Ai wuz alwayz dragged along, nawt liek it then glad for it naow.
here ya go with one from Godsmack, it helps me, but it’s not for everyone, some unkind language.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OT8yAQjB8ro
hai
Ohai!
Welcome tew Cheezland!
i haz 5 kittehs sew i can no haz a tree. teh kittehs takes all the stuff offa teh tree and puts it all ova teh place!
too bad!
awesome i wouldve beleived it! JK! its cute you shouldve hung it on a string and save it for next year!awesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesomeawesome