…and if you’re smart you’ll STAY down.
…and if you’re smart you’ll STAY down.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: Winnie-Wonka
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Cheezburger Network Blog
“aight’ take my cheefburgr an leave me alone <.<
Ohai, shado0w. Lukz liek nobudee elz inna whirld b up yit. Kan ai sillybrate wif u?
Oh, der’z Martha. Kum sillybrate wif us.
Ai notised u don’t hab n’ee frends yet shado0w. Ai hab sent u a frend request.
yeah nawt so oftn heer
ai wanna cake fur celebratiuns =)
Yay fur shadoOw in teh taupe spot!
.
An browt yoo a liddle present to sillbrayte. An yoo can share it wif ebreewun!
.
Tom Lehrer “Poisoning the Pidgeons in teh Park.”
.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhuMLpdnOjY
ohai Janet! Hao wus teh swarming yestermadai? Did yu awl get tehre an bak ok? An can we has pikchurs ob teh pritteh stinkees yet?
Sune, verree sune! Mai brother-in-law iz beeing verree SLOW!!! But there will be LOGS ov pichures ov teh pretteh stinkees, sum ov teh Nawtee Barn (bak an frunt), mai Mom’s house, teh screen haus, teh view across teh rode, a view ov teh walking path around teh farm AND teh kitteh cemetary!
.
Tehn ebreewun will know moar about mee than. . .LOL! Ai think purrhpas TMI???
Tom Lehrer FTW!!!
Dis is sum scary sh*t…!
first!
naic pikshur
yeah. or i’ll smash you
Teh paf of teh rightus burd is beset on awl sydes by the inikuitis of teh selphish and the dyranny of iwil burdz. Bleshed is hii, hoo in teh nayme of sharidy and gootwill, sheephurds the weeg trouh teh walii oph non-brightnuss, phor he iss twulie his bwotha’s keepurr an teh phindor oph wlost chilldrun. An ay will shdrike down uphon thee wif greht wueangence and phurius angwair sos hoo would adempt to pwoison an distroi mai bwothas. An yu will no mai name is teh Holy Burd wen I leh mai wueangence uphon thee.
mafia birds?
Yaey,mai fairst evar poost.
oopz,maide my name rong.
Iz u a *lukz rownd tu see if enneewun iz lissning* fiyremenz? If u iz, i thinking dat u will b welkummed by mennee peepz rownd here.
Oh Hai.My farst poost. Ai iz happy
doont huurt me! I iz a kittteh!
Fireaxe888, corngrass ulullashuns on ur furst post! I maed mai furst post a couple wieks ago. Don’ wurry, dis verra neic communniittee. Nobuddee said annyting meen to me even tho I teip’d badlee. 1 of teh reguulars, Cweenmj took me to the ty boo teek for sillybrashuns. Ai woodn’t want her 2 bee ’shiamed uv mee for not xtendin teh courtesees to u, so letz go! Nowt sure were it iz but c’mon an we’ll find it!
Ohai Fireaxe888! Doan wurry, wii iz frendly nyse peeps heer in cheezland, welcom!!!
U da only wun here? Ebrywun else asleep? N ai hab tu go tu bed shortly.
N’eway! Hab sum drinkies n dansies ub ur choise tu sellebrate ur nawt sekund comment.
Greedee dirtee birdz
I guess dey is not teh bloo birds of happeeness.
But they AR burds! An blooish. A gud start. . .
Dey doan’t maek me happi tho!
Mawm!!! dems burdeez tuk meh lunch munny… again
Ai reely must go tu bed naow. Itz late fur me here. Hab fun eberybuddy. Ai will check on ur parti wen ai getz up tumorro.
Nite, nite, MarthaV!! See yoo tomorro!
Nyce burdies….nyce burdies….*runs awai fast*
*cuvvaz aiz wid poorz*
Y teh big burdiez b so meen? Ai onlee ask if dey haz ne cheezburgers! I thort we cud be fwenz. Ai spoze ds meenz noes?
The Pigeon Mafia are not a clan you wanna mess wit’.
but but but… wat iffn ai bring yu a shubbery? a nyce won?
The good feathers.
oh, mai! taht pun almost went unner teh raydar! but iz gud wun!
I miss The Animaniacs SO MUCH!
ME TOO!! My girly kitty is named Rita cuz she’s sarcastic a mouthy!!
Dis lol iz teh stuff uv nitemaerz. Ai aern’t frited uv mutsh, but Ai doan’t liek pijns.
ai agrees, annipussl whair ai libs, we had teh pijin infesstashun. an ai hated tehm
Ai libs in Lundun TTI an pijnz aer ebbriware – dey flie so lo dat dey brush ur hedd an dey maek a nastee mess unner awl teh ralewai brijis. PLEH!
ai wuz finkin ob bof lundun an veniss an how menny yukky burds were tehr, an whai ai wuz so upsets wif maybe 10.. or 20… an tehy did nawt brush mai hedd! ai tries a rubber band gun to skare tehm, but didn’t shoot hai enuf. ai liked haow veniss took kare ub kittehs tho, wif piles ob kitteh litter in teh littel skwares..
Yeeeeaaaahhhh…Ai went tew Venice last yeer, an’ dere were awl dese pijins in St Mark’s Square, an’ Ai sorta thout Ai wuz gunna die.
I darez 2 say I dont like teh pijins becawz tehy have nasty RAW MEAT FEET!!
PLEH PLEH PLEH!!!
iz nt get tht 1..o.O
itz urly in teh morning
itz grey and froggy outside
ai makes teh cuppa tea
ai sitz down at the pyooter
suddinly, ai is confronted by pigins.
big pigins.
looking down at me.
wif teh fethers all floofed out.
ai cannot tell if tehy is teh angry or teh cyoorious.
so tell me, doc, duz this dreem mean ai’m teh crazy?
or wut?
It iz not deh dreem dat meenz u b crazy. Itz deh wut? dat meenz u crazy.
.
.
G’morning Fleep!! I haz a lubblee sunrize kuming up over deh Laguna Madre rite owt my frunt window. soft pastelz, pink and yellow and bloo and burplol, wif liddlol poofee klowdz. I finkso it b a gud day!!
Wut did yoo say cweenmj??
No SUN!!!! Wut duz this meen????
It meens ai am in Michigan in Novembur an yoo ar sumwhere in Texas!
.
Ai am up. Pre-tea, so a bit haizee – laik teh grey day autside. It’s lite – but tehre iz no sun!!!
.
Oh! ai know.
Fleep! GUD MORNING!!!! Taht’s a reelee nice pome yoo rote there! Do yoo hav a title???
It cud bee . . .
Ai See Big pigins
B. Big pigins
C. Crazy dreem. . .or wut???
D. . .
Demented Dreem
Eggs Over Nawt So Eezy
Fillippe’s Madness
Grate Bawls ov Fyre!! Pigins!
Hen Pekked!!
Inspektor Pigeonz ov Doom
J. . .
Just run awai frum de pijins
Kindly doan pek meh, thx
Leef me aloan,pijins!
Mahhhmmmm! deres pijins, halp!
N…..
Jes Anudder Dreem
Keepz Awai frum deh Pijuns
Leef Mii Alone
Maek Dem Go Awai!!
N …
Nawt nise pijins
Odiferuss pijins
pewtrid pijins
Qwite awful pijins..
Reelee nastee pijns
Stinkee pijns
Too mennee pijns
Ugh pijns
V…
heeheehee anni
LOL!! Ai wanted to say taht, too!!
Veree scaeree pijins
Waddya want us to do wid yuu pijins
X-tremelee feerce pijins
Y are dese pijins lukin at *me*?
ZAP! Deh anti-pijin fowrs-feeld wurked
woo-hoo wut a great list eberybuddy.
mornin ebberywon…it bez gray day hear JKH4K. Nobember in Ohaio
mush liek Michigun. PLEAH! Ai awlso don liek deh pigins…1 poo pooed
on mai shouldr wonce. icky. Ai fink dat be a reflxion awf my lief rite
naow. I haz a sad I can’t git rid awf.
awww {{{{serendipity}}}} sorree u haz a sad
Oh Serendipity!! Waht can we doo to halp? {{{{{serendipity}}}}} Ai, too, am sorree to heer ov this. But yoo hav come to teh rite plaice heer!
.
Wud yoo laik to joyne mee an bluesfan473 in a nyce cuppa tee??? Erl Gray?
Ooh! An biscotti, to dunkinit!
Chonklilt cubbered, oar plane?? We can haz both!
fank u…ai be sew depresseded ai don no waht 2 do wif stoopie
self.
tee & biscotti wud be wonndermuss, fank u.
Drinkin deh Url Grey tee wid de Cheezfrens is a gudly start at be-in nawt stoopie.
I iz alsew in Meechigan, nearby 2 Ohai-O. Deh wether is pleh last fue dayz, but manee udder things are good. Akshoe-ally, not sew mush is gud, naow I tinks about it. Moar tee 4 mee, plz.
Ai can haz beddur eeconomee, plz?
Ai needz a job an iz no jobs fur enjin-ears round here.
ohai, serendipity, I haz a depressed, 2. Using awl my trikks on it, lke mayking lists ov what I am grateful for. Meddytayshun, exersize. Hazzing a liddle kry then washing teh eyeglasses and gedding up to do fings. Reeding sumfing to mayke me laff. Imagining teh depresshun az a nawty being whu nees help, nd holding it in teh light. Imagining teh depression az unbakeded dough, and teh heat ov sitting wif it will bake it into useful bread. Gibbing teh depression az a gift to CC, whu will transform it into energy.
Gedding enuff sleep and high quality fuds.
I hopes yu feels bedder suun, and yur personal sun comes out and shines for you.
deer blonde in bloo, u haz Xcellent trikks.
{{{{{ blonde & serendipity }}}}}
Fank yu, Kayjoy.
{{{{Kayjoy}}}}
{{{{{serendipity}}}}
{{{{ebberywun hu wants a hug}}}}
{{{{blonde in bloo}}}}
{{{{{serendipity}}}}
fank yoo, leeza-b. {{{{leeza-b}}}}
Did yu get hiking in the mountains?
yes… teh hike was nice but it was a weerd day.
I got a tikket on teh way to the meeting place to carpool.
Then when we got to teh park, a ranger stops us and asks if we has a permit, & sez we has too many people. *sigh* He took my information and ran some kinda check on me, and tehy let us hike, but apparentlee if I take another group of more than 8-10 people in withowt a permit & get cot, I cud get cited to teh toon of $175. (We had 24 ppls). I’ve bin hiking all over teh NC mtns for years and had NEVER heard of this, or heard of it happening to anyone else… there r no signs saying u has to have a permit… he sed it was on teh website. Well hoo checks that?? I had a big frustrated. *sighs agin* Have u ever heard of this?? I know u hikes a lot.
Teh weerd weekend continyoos.. I’z on my way to my sister’s for nephews bday partee and she just called.. shez in a bad mood and takin it owt on me…. *3rd sigh*
Sowry.. I didnt mean to vent.
I has to leeve now but when I get back, I sez we makes a ginormus pitchur of dubble strength top shelf margareetas and starts drinkin!
{{{bloo blonde}}}
From won to anotter!
ai say, tayke pitcher uv margaritaz 2 teh kidlet’s burfdae partee!!
sorrry to heer yu haz a frustrated, leeza-b. I did nawt no yu needed a permit for grups, but then, I uzually hikes by myseff or wif one or two odder peeps, nawt in a big group. Wuz this a state or nashunal park? Are yu a leeder in an outdoor club?
I hopes teh birfday party iz gud…
When yu coms bakk, we will brake out teh margaritas and teh moobies.
Alsew: talking to frends, family, and luvved wunz. Watching a funny (or sometimez a rilly skary or an ol timey klassik) movie. Going for a walk around tha naybahood. Borrowing a stak ov books frum the liberry. Windoe shopping. Listening to blues musik (or klassikal).
[this one's kind of embarrassing, but what tha hey]
Putting James Brown’s greatest hits on the stereo and dansing arownd tha living room, the kind of dansing that Keith Knight calls “booty higher than head”.
[sorry for tha mental piksha]
Blonde in bloo, u do haz xcellent trickses. Fank yew fur sharin dem. Ai haz a depressed, 2 at tiemz, adn ai will B yoozing yewr trickses. Yew R bery compachon — comfashion — bery kind 2 B sharin dem.
{{{{{tabbehkitteh}}}}}
Hope teh light always shines fru teh clowds for yu, and that yu remembers it iz there.
{{{{blonde in bloo}}} } Nao mai eyes haz tearz becus yew iz so kind adn enkurrajing. Wen ai haz a depressed, ai do furget teh light iz there. Ai am greatfull fur yewr wisdom.
[Pushes hart shaped box of bonbons across table so serendipity can take som]
ai cahn dew de danse uv de pleh, grey, cowld, creeky gnees dai iffen it wil chear u upz!
step kik (ow)
slide chainge (grooan)
do si do wif a fireman (woot!)
jazz handz!
wash out 4 does fyremen…dats mai beegest problem rite naow.
Dey kan run n2 burning places wif no thot af der safety, but dey
be emotional cowards!
ut oh! *boots fireman owt uv de dans*
.
skip hop
cha cha cha!
swing ur pardner
allemand lef wif a YNG! (dubble woot!!)
u bez bery lite on does floofy pawz…an only 2 left feetsies!
giggol
ai reeds “geeky nees”
>ai duz geeky dans<
twirl twirl
hoppity hopy
shimmee shake
((((((((serendipity))))))))))))))))
ai came here wif a bad sad wunse an ai sew preeshiates teh nais cheezfrenz talkin me daown..tehy has hearts, an tehy shows u em.
Ohai MM and BF473-
Creeky, geeky knees, I haz dem.
Is espeshully creeky in deh damp, cold moarnings liek too-day.
Dansin is a reely gud wai to stretch and bend dem sew deh work beddur.
Dansin wid deh firemens or YNGs frum de NB is ebben bettur.
{{{{serendipity}}}}
Soree yur favurit fyremans iz showing emotional coawardis.
Iz beree hard two be deh one who iz wate-ing fer deh persons hoo risk der lievs to cum back.
ai tole him, ai nawt playin dis game eny longer…ai nawt
gitting eny younger & ai nawt sleeping wif deh telefone
enymoor. we boff lost our best friend in each odder an ai
ar so sad, but waz maeking me sic waiting 4 him to maek
decision, so ai maed it! stil nawt easy…ai giev up on luv
forebber!!
Plz nawt say forebber about no moar luv. I hoeps berry mushly you are rong bout dat.
I iz veree soree you haz lost yur best frend and beloved. If not deciding waz maekin you sic, you had to due soemthing, tho.
Dans, deink tee (or tee-key-la wen it gitz latur) and be sillee for a whiel wid de cheezfrens and yoo will feel beddur.
tee key la sounz gud…unfortunately, I can’t drink
alcohol…makes mai arms numb & heart go weird.
ai old lady naow, nd 2 git used 2 bein by self…iz
just sew hard an ai lubs him so mush.
o, serendipity…{{{{serendipity}}}}}
my heart aches for you. please don’t give up on love forever, though. I feel like I did, and forever is a long time to be lonely. (Except, of course, one isn’t lonely all the time, just once in a while)
Holding you and you best friend/beloved in the light, and wishing great healing for your hearts.
graaaate dans, howsomebber.
iz gray in minney soda today, but we is our frum under teh thumm ob teh bushee junyor in Jan!! some of teh treez here are still beeeyotimus! iz taim for me tew leev werk!!!
I spoke tu soon. Deh water heeter b putting owt no waterz! PLEH!! now wii haz tu haz a cwappee day playing maintenance man. Adn it b sunday so awl deh shopz b closed. PLEH! i say, PLEH! adn dubble PLEH!!!
Oh cweenmj! NAWT teh PLEH maintenance day awn a Sunday! But – yoo can at leest haz sun! That iz sumthing!
That mite cheer yoo up!
.
{{{{[{{cweenjm)
.
Come awn down – oar up??? Ai dont know fur snur wahere we ar heer – an haz sum nice tee an biscotti! Shud cheer yoo up a bit. An maek sum tituls fur Fleep’s nice pigeion pome! An watch Tom Lehrer!! Yoo see??? Lots ov gud things!
.
An we cud joyne blluesfan473 in teh “Owie Dans.”
*pullz awl cheezfrends into de danse* *putz Cotton Eyed Joe muzik awn*
lef, rite, lef, rite!
naow inno de center & form a star!
swing, skip, do si do!
slide,chaing,maik up de steps az u goe along!
twirl, twirl, twirl!
mai frend emayod me de bes weddin danse video, ai doan hab mush luck puttin linkees awn heer but iffen u goes 2 youtube & puts in
.
‘Brian & Katie’s Evolution of Wedding Dance’ ai fink u will bee likin it! Iz kinda long butt ai doan fink u wil bee board. Iz uv a prittee gurl & handsum butt kinda hefty gui whoo wil suprize u aifinkso!
Aawww. u guise iz soo gud tu mii. ♥
And now wii haz deh wadder heeter werking. Wii guess it just hadded tu much pressurez…… if dat can b a problum …… wii draininged it adn den ir refilled and now it be werking fine …….wadder cumz owt uv deh hot fawcett now….and it b heeting up…. i think it b tyme fer a shower and go owt exploring dis fine plais!!
Dat’s gud! Cowld showerz – do nawt want!
tohse berdz be so scairee! Ize be ‘fraid of duh berdz bai muh hows nao. Gunna gitz me a hawtdawg 2 scair zem uhway.
Reminds me of the mobster pigeons from Animaniacs … or maybe I’m just old. ^_^
Okaj Okaj!
I ooly says u gimme teh cheezeburger u stoole from meh !
Wen pijins goe bahd….film at elebenty
yu meen tehre R gud pijins?!
wel, maybee de noos report shud bee Wen bahd pijins goe worse-film at elebenty.
ai still haz deh sleepy…i fought u said “wen jijins goe bald”…an ai’m a finkin does
deh getz deh mange? Stoopie on meh dis mornin!
bf473! Grate Title fur Fleep’s pome! Yoo shud go an put it up there – when teh taim iz rite!!
.
Hai Ambercat!! Yoo meen yoo don’t laik pigions??
tehy is flyink rats! Wots to lyk?!
Iffen yoo ketch dem and feedz dem korn or udder grains fer a cupple weeks, den cuk dem slowlee in a niec wine sauce, deh is pretty tastee. Bee warnid doe, freshlee cawt urbun pijins DO NOT WANT. Dems taste veree bad.
/LOLFronsch
MMMMmmmmm. Lays or-two-lans sont dee-lish-ee-us!
Essay-vous, mes fromage amis.
C’est soofeet pour two le mound!
/LOLFronsch
hmm, Ai fink it wud tayk mor tahn a cupple ob weeks to maek teh TTI urbane pijins edibubble – teyh is full ob ikky diseeses.
Omnomnomnom sownd deelishus momcatanna!
But wen mah kitteh catsh the pijins deyz nommed beefaw iz can feedz them!
I habs a fren hoo grewd up in TTI. he sez peeps kan catch deh pijins or wild chikuns by putting a broomstraw thru rays-ins, and picking dem up when the straw gets cawt in der froats.
I haz nebber tryed it. But we thought it wud be a good thing to no haow to do iffen the cibilization caem to ending. I shaer info wid cheezfrends, in caes ofb need. Dat way, if ebberyone noes, will not be need.
(Mai sympathetic majik skillz, I shows you dem.)
nds moor fromage!!
mmmmmmmm fromage……
***runs 2 kitchin & getz fromage 4 mugglemary*** heer, i haz plenty 2
cher, but no sunny dis morning! snerk
Ebreeting iz beddur wid moar fromage!
Unless yoo iz Julia Child.
Shee sez “Everything is good with enuough butter.”
Budder and garlic mayke everyfing gud — eben snails!
Yum budder an garlic! I lubs dem. Snails, not sew mushly.
I godda go dew chores and stuff.
Mai big boi kitteh needs buttuns on his comando pantz fer de fencing practiss.
Thks, bai ebberybuddii.
snails! eek! Ebberybody runz 4 youz livez!
****Deh attak awf deh giant snails….news @ elebenty! ****
aifinkso eben mai creeky-gneed self cud owtrun a snayl!
Or mabey walk 4 yr lives?
ai gonna get ready 4 church naow, altho ai’m reely mad @ God…maebe ai shld staa hoem…cant deside.
If yoo haz teh gud frenz an church, tehn yoo shud go! Frenz can cheer yoo up! At yoo will be out an doing things – sumwaht gud fur teh depresshun an sad. But itz so hard, ai know. Wehn wun cannawt haz wun’s hart’s desire. *sniff* That iz verree verree sad.
.
Ai think ebreewun heer haz bin there in sum way. But wehn teh woond iz fresh, it duz hurt so much.
waz goin 2 gnu church 2dai…can’t go back to old one. Tew many memories
and ai can’t stop crying, so will stay hoem tewdai. don want 2 go 2 gnu
plaic blubbering liek idiot!
Ai know, ai know! Wun duzzn’t want to be a blubbering liek idiiot in publik. an it’s so hard to put awn a brave faice, wehn yur aies ar leeking awn teh insyde.
.
Just know taht yoo haz frenz heer. An ai doo hoep yoo getz yur frend bak. Taht iz just too,too hard!
ai goin tew sit n corner naow…fanks to ebberywon 4 beeing sew kind. ai reely
lubs bein on heer wif u funny cheezpeepz. maebe i cum bak on 2nite. ai needz
cry dis out.
awww sweetie, taik care uv urself, cum bak & tawk 2 uz anee tyme {{{{{serendipity}}}}}
{{{serendipity}}}
That’s adorable!
Tha last thing a peece of popcorn sees.
GREAT pic!!!! Darn good photog! Also, scarier than heck….
^5 Tessie on what would be a great caption, LOLz!
Noes, noes….u cant do tish…
…plz..doan jus leeve me in pain at teh poolside…
…while u run off WIT MAH BUKKIT!!!!…*sob*…
de ebil pijins stoal ur bukkit??? Oh noze!
Didn’t Alfred Hitchcock maek teh horror moovie liek dis?
These birds, they are so intimidating!!! Yes master beakers! I stay down!!! Great capshun!
kitteh sez nom nom nom nom
ohai, i haz a saveengz dis wun to compewtor.
aka “goodfeathers” XD
awww i thought i will be first one time