Safety blanket
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Cheezburger Network Blog
Dis wunz mien. Get yer own.
Ohai NS! U gots teh nawt sekkund nawt sekkund!! Wut wud u liek fur sillybrashuns?
I has a hongry. Can we plz has piggehs in blankets?
Mmm – dat sownds yummeh. Kin dey be cre-sawnt dough blankets?
I donut knoes why not.
Oooh! How bout donut dough blankets?
speaking of fud, I just overheard a question of after-show fud. The answer was chicked fried rice.
.
and my mind pondered……….do chickens fry rice?
……………………………….or…how on earth do ya batter and fry each grain of rice?
bery carefullee.
nd wut abowt battered wifez? haow big a pawt ub batter yu nedez?
I haz a feelin GP mite be a little shocked when he reeds this thred.
Did u notice hoo rekwested deh piggehz in blankee?? nun uzzer dan deh deh deliteful LCB.
Okay. Piggehs in blankees it iz. We even haz teh sparklee relish condor mintz to go wif dem.
*Nomz a condor.* mmmm mintee!
Pssst! Cweenmj, u haz a fether stuk in yur teeth.
Kwap! I hate wen dat happenz
*remoovez fevver.*
if ya have a cravin’ for pasta…….den put da fevver in yer hat
an callit makaronee?
oh, WOOF! woof, woof, woof.
*sidewayz grin* yup dat’s de idea, wah-haw
oh mai, SHD! taht sawng is *YANKEE* doodle! whut iz a TEXAN dooing referring to taht? tehy will tayke away ur tecksan lysense!
the fact that I can read without moving my lips is a mitigating factor in that.
Den it wud be feathercini alfredo.
Hmmm. Mebbe Wite Rushunz? Eever dat or lemmin martooniez. Kint kwite decide. Ai leebz teh dansin ideeyuhz to udder pplz. Aiz still atwerk — kin hied drinkses. Kint hied danses so well.
Shure u can! U can make up a excuse for dansing. Like…
A bee was in my unnerwares.
Butt was itchy.
Can’t control my groove thang today.
Didn’t see that teh captain had turned on teh No Dansing sine
E…
Elolfants (teh pinkee 1s) wuz after meh
Flamingo dans iz gud fur finking.
Go-Go dans dans iz practiss fur sekkind jawb
H…
Hart wuz full ob end ob day joi
Ice cubes down teh clothing
Jumpin beens in mai shues
k…
Kan’t touch dis!
Laffin mai a$$ off.
Marshunz attakk. I fite dem off.
N…
Nastee Cheetah aftur mai jacket
Orinj juis, free in the break rum
Pleez let me leab wurk nao
Q…
Quakkz on deh floor, must jump over!!
Rustee kneez, must exersize.
S…..
Shimmy attack!
The music, it is in me!
Unnerwares was needing to be readjusted and my hands was full.
Victory dance because teh tech support kitteh in teh previous lol actually eventually answered my kwestion.
W…
Why can’t ai dans at werk? Ai tink ai can!
Xcitment- ai haz it!
YNG! Ai dans wid him
Z-rox machine. Ai don’t know why dat makes me dans, but it starts wit a Z
Egg-salad list, pplz! Ai will haz to try deze owt…
But wait, there’s moar below! C’mon guise, we needs to finsiht teh second part of teh list.
Evreebuddee elz wuz dansing
Funky chikken invashun
Got antz in mai pantz
H…..
Halp! Officequake!
I was waving o hai to teh peeps two buildings over.
Just braking in my new epidermal cells.
K…
Kinetic fantasy
Lambada just got meh
Moove eet-Moove eet
N…
Never one to stand on teh sidelines
Once around teh dans floor
Prancing like there’s no tomorrow
Q…
Queenz onna radio..
Richard Simmons sez move it
Salsa moozic alway maeks me dans.
T…
Quikk!! git up on deh desk wif mii!! Derez a
Reelee, reeeleee big
SNAKE!!!!!
T…
A SNAKE A SNAKE, OOoooOOO it’s a SNAAAKE!!!
(sry it got der bettah ov meh)
Time fur a coffee brake
Up heer on teh desk
Very safe frum snakes, work, etc,
W…
Tell mii u see deh dansing Conga Ratz, tew!!
U don’t??
Very well, I
Will
Xcape now.
Y u follow mii???
Zee end.
*clappin floofee pawz*
Nookular numchux in mah nikkerz
Opyoolunt orniges on Orwellyun Otturz
Pyoosillamninus pi$$ants… doin taht pi$$ant in yur pants thang.
Q…
Querllus peep in neggst cube bovverin mii.
Rabbit trikkt mii.
Silly rabbit, trikz r 4 kidz
T……
Therez no plaice like home!! Klikk heelz.
Unbeleevablol!! I gotz awl mai werke dun!
Varmintz attakkt!!!
W……
Windows Vista nawt working again
Xactly Whut did U key in Again?
Y U eggspect me to fix it.
Zeebra pants on Ebay, I get them!!
LOL!
Krazy lady in teh awfice
Lawts ob kinks tu werk owt
Me? Ai dans tu a differunt drummer
N….
Now wared mai stapler go?
Oh, there it iz!
Peepz keep moving mai stuff!!!!!
Quit moving mai stuff, peepz!!!
R….
*Runz away wif teh stayplur!*
Snikkerz
Tittlez
U….
U kum bak heer Now!!!
V…
Very big spyder scairt me
Waiter, ders a fly in my soop
Xtra Hawt sauce is Xtra hawt.
Y R U staring at me, iz time for nap
ZZzzzz
I’m amazed at how many lists have been completed for this one topic!
…my brayne awlmost ’sploded.
No more finking tonight, Aifinkso…OOPs 2 layte
‘SPLODE’
Can’t ! Noe moar letturz left!
.
.
(BTW, ment ‘titterz’ teh giglol, nawt ‘tittlez’ the littul mawrks)
There is another one that needs finishing.
Kit Kat dans so nawt go to waist
Last box of tuna to unpack
Messy floors needs teh mops
N…
Nobuddy spozed tu seeing mii. Dis MAI space.
Oh, noez, dey steelin mai bukkit.
Pardun mii, duz u hav ennee grey poupon?
Q…..
Quick! Ai haz an itch!!
Rite THERE!!!
Scratch a liddle harder, pleeze!
That’s rite!! That’s teh spot!
Up a liddle ohai err pleeze. Ahhhhhhh!!!!
Verreee nice!! Ooooo Thanks a lot!
What??? Yoo wantz yur bak scritched??
Xtra hard – rite there in teh middlol???
Zazktlee teh rite spot, yoo say? *scritch scritch scritch* There! Dun.
ZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz in pease.
Gud nite to awl!!
*pores NS a niec tawl glass ob hoemmaed Katluah wif milkz adn sum ice* Hear u goes!! NE1 else?
Miii! mii! plz???
Sip, sip, sip.
mmmmmmmmmm.
Thankz.
That b awsum!
Oooh! Me! Me! Pick me!
*pores NS a niec tawl glass ob hoemmaed Katluah wif milkz adn sum ice and gibs it to NS*
Ai gnu ai liekz yew!!!
*pours sum vanillol vodka in teh drinkee*
…
*sluuuuuuuuuuurp*
…
Mmmmm. Nao datz gud drinkz!
…
*addz vanillol vodka to teh drinkee Goosie maded fur meh*
*sluuuuuuuuuuurp*
…
Cheezfrenz iz teh bestest!
I can haz Plz? Katluah an creem iz mye favorite!
Or a Mudd slyde! Yum!
Hoemmaed? Yoo can doo that?? Ai’d laik to try it!
.
*sip sip sip* Yum!!!
*sip sip sip* Yum!!
*sip sip sip* LOL!! This iz reelee gud!! Yoo haz teh recipeee????
I wonder where the person is that used to be inside that jacket?
i wondered that…..
Hooman left teh wrapper
I tink da hoomin wuz stil in da rapper…..I tink I sees a runnin shoo
At nawt-secund I thawt that wuz a sneeker, but upon kloser inspeckshun, I think is loleopard’s front paw.
didn’t werk for the previus owner….
Chzpeepz iz klevr! w))t!
*whut duz woot mean? plz?*
Iz a sound peepz make when they are happeee!!
similar to Hooray!!
Wikipedia sez:
Of uncertain origin; most likely from a 1993 dance catch-phrase “whoot, there it is!”,[1] but other theories exist, such as that it is a blend of wow and loot (as might be exclaimed during a role-playing game), an acronym for “we owned the other team”, a corruption of root (as might be exclaimed by a hacker on obtaining root access), or a derivative of Scots hoot.
.
U kin also finding moare bowt w00t at urban dictionary
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=woot
That looks like teh jacket my fren was waring. No my fren is missing. Dids u see mah fren, big kitteh?
ur fren had a flavr.
*snerk*
Ai wudda sed dat if yew haddint sed it.
must of been kinda bland.
if ur fren was wearing a members only jacket…….how much taste can he have?
*luks fur paypurrr towulz to cleen hur monitor & keeboard*
sry ’bout dat.
S’ok. Dey belawngz to werk ennywaiz.
the poor sod in the IT dept. must hate us.
he’z probably on here 2….
Big kitteh sai, “No, an I not see old lady neethur”.
while hiding away teh powder-bloo polyester pantsoot
That haz puzzled mee fur sum taim. WAI doo so menee liddle old ladies hav teh powder-bloo ployester pantsoots? An wai doo they ware them in public???
.
Must bee a reeson . But waht can it bee??? Speshullee in Florida. Seems to me.
tehy are maed by Teh Offishul Old Ladee Owtfitters. (i offen see tehr ads in teh sunday kyoopons.) tehy also haz pantsoots in labender, mint green, peech, an wite. i fink lotsa teh liddle old ladees liek tehm becawz tehy iz sylish (tahts wut teh ad sez!! so tehy must be!!) comfy, eezee-kare, an cheep. my muvver-in-law wunse offerd to let me borrow herz catalog frum tehm. i grashusly declined. ifinkso az attitudes abowt being old chaynje, we will not see so many ob tohs pantsoots. at leest i haz no intenshuns ob ever wering wun.
Ai fink mennee old ladeez wears dem becuz dere fingrrs gets stiff wif arfritisses an dey don liek to fooling wif rowz uv buttonses or eben teh zipperses. Mai laet muvver-in-law luvved teh scrub soots fur dat reezon — she had dem in diffrent colors an pattrns after she mooved into teh sisted livin place. Dey didden need irnin, eeder. (No YNGs in teh sisted livin place.)
Wut? Ai wuz cowld! Gotta prawblem wit dat?
I lubs mah prity blankee
Gotz dis jacket frum a running man. He sayed sumting bout a lyon, an den he getz inna car.
Oh, mabye that was my fren. Did he say anything about waiting in teh car for LCB? Or did he driveawayfast?
Ai theenk he yelled
“Quik, get in teh kar!”
Oh. I didnot hear that. I hads my hed in teh lion’s mouf, waiting for my fren to take my pickshur.
Ai saw dat pikshur on You-tube! u lookd gud!
Eye noez whut u doin in dat lyons mouf! U steelin himz gold filliingz!
Nawtee lolcatburgler, u burgalin a lolcat!!
Iz yew shur dis “fren” is *rillee* yer fren?
cheezeztwice itzalyon geddinnakar!
only to be lukkin at the keys dangling in the ignition, mockingly, on the other side of the locked car-door.
.
annalyon lukkin ovver yer shoulder sayin’ “yep…….dats a pickel”
*steelz teh pickel*
…
*runsawayfast*
oooo… and teh lyon wuz lookin forward to a hoomin and pickel sammich 2.
Big kitteh needz blankie 2!
Stoopie hooman wanted mai fur coats. I tooked hiz instead.
In soviet rusha, fur takez ur coat!
*snert*
oh hai! I wuz reedin a few paostes bak ur mamkat was eetin teh gifelte feesh an teh red cabbij.
Will u be selebratin hannukah soon?
My bestest fren in skool was jewish, an her momkat turned dis southren guurl
on to mannee yummee fuds.
Kugel
lox, teh brisket
TEH CHOPPEE LIVAH *droolin*
K i has a hongree nao.
We litez teh candles fur Hanukkah, but duzzint do teh Hanukkah prezzintz. We duz teh Krismis tree (or teh “Hanukkah Bush” if we wantz to claim dat) & teh Krismis prezzintz. Mah Daddykat wuz teh Jewish wun in teh famblee — went ober teh brij 12 yeerz ago (still missingz him muchlee). We duz teh candle fing to honor him & himz fambleez tradishunz… plus we lieks candles & datz a bery gud excuse.
Haz yew had latkes (potato pancaekz) wif sour creem? YUM!!! Ai lubz teh lox & creem cheez onna egg bagel. *drool*
…
*goes back to eetin edamame*
Yesh I has had a bellee ful of teh latkes.
i did teh passover at mah frens hawse one tiem,
teh seder dinner was varee impessimabul to a yung gurl hoo
onlee knowed teh babptist christian wai.
But dere famblee wuz teh same as urs
sceptin teh momkat wuz teh jewish one in teh famblee.
Dey did bof holeedais, mai Momkat thot is was full of teh stranj.
I THOT IT WUZ KEWL!!!
Respektin beleefs,
Moar peeps shud does eet!
Aiz bin tryin to figure owt hao to werk Kwanzaa candles into teh decor, but aiz nawt shoor hao dat wud werk.
@@@@@!
DERE WUZ A HOOMIN IN DIS SHEERT?
REALEE???
U DOANT SEZ!!!
WOW!
WELL MEBBE U SHUD COMES UP HERE AN MEAK SHURE……
*likkin chawps….mmmm dissurt!*
I rawk mah memburrs onlee jackit!
I LUB TEH 80’s!
big hare don’t care!
Belly full, is nap time now.
That looks more like a jacket…where is the owner?
guess
Sorii fur playn blankut. Mai lepurd-print blankut wuz in teh wash.
Fasst runneeng Kitteh
habz sekooritee blankitt
andz spawtz awll ober
Kitteh’z noo blankitt
iz stillz wawrm frum t3h Hewmin
hoo diskarded itz
Kitteh awllwayz wantz
2 seez wut Hewmin luukz lyke
wiff awll dayr cloathz awff
Fasst runneeng Kitteh
feenkz Hewminz luukz sillee dis
way. Himz may keepz cloathtz
Jack.
I sucspect a shoe in dere? Kitteh haz a chewing habit?
wer da shoe? I dun see a shoe. I see a left paws…. is dat where u was lookin?
I SEEZ DA SHOE! ["Carpe 'Didas..."]
Dem kitteh gon’ be stashin’ da camper in da tree fa be eatin’ later…
Dere is noe shoe! Dere is ownlee… DAH PAW!!!
Ohai Africat! Ai’ve got 4:30 in teh moarning heer in Meeshigun! Woke up an cudn’t go bak to sleep!! Waht taim are yoo now??
Ohai an gud moarnin tu yu JCH4K! It’z 11:45 in teh AM heer in teh dessurt. Hao r yu dis moarnin, an y is yu up soooo eerly?
Tank gudness dat no da shoe…dat tooooo creepy.
I think kitteh been eatin in bed.
Awww…Linus da Lolpard
Ai has nu Leopurd coat, likes?
It actually appears to be the tattered remains of a shirt. hmm, wonder if the human was tasty
tasty an nootrishus
I had a yuman, but I ated him.
an him had a flavr.
i dont think thats a safety blanket…i think he ate a hoomin!!!!
Oh noes, capshun is wrong.
Iz no safety blanket.
Iz security blanket!
‘N da stuffin’ wuz nummy
OMG! Is dat a hoomin?!