Dis wittle piggy
Dis wittle piggy went to market…
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: shinelikestars
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Cheezburger Network Blog
An got a cyoot liddle kitteh.
WARNING – to those liable to splort. Maek berry shore awl yore purrteckshun is in plaes.
Ah Madame, congaratshoelashes pour votre ne pas de sekkund! Tray Bean!
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Sillybrayshuns pour vous ce soir?
Mairsee Monsewer, Mais ma daijernay est pret a manjay. Je vai nomme!
Bon Appetit!
ooooh, teh lolfronsch….
*swoon*
Fromage, pamplemousse, chemin de fer, epluchures…
ah oui martoonie, “le pamplemousse”, c’est un de mes mots favoris!!
Tish! Ur speeking fraynch!
Addams family ref, ftw!
Too laet – teh toes – TEH TOES!
*BOOM*
ohno! Snippet fawl daon, go boom!
RUN AWAY!!! RUN AWAY!!! AI’S NAWT KIDDIN!!! Itz a slawter, ai tellz yu! Dere’s brainz ebbereewere, awl ober teh plaice! DONUT LUK AT TEH PIKTOOR! Donut goe daon dis fred!!! O teh huje manatee!!!
er, splorted, taht iz…
Hmmm… dat wud bee teh pwoblem. hee probly haz teh manneeeee brainz, but ai finks hee’ll bee otay ifn him stayz unner teh water fur a wyle. teh water pressurrre shud help kontain teh splortin. yep, aifinkso.
Purrtekshun didden wurk. *SPLORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRT*
*hides in white clothes* if any1 asks,i’m not here.
And this little kitteh had a SPLORT!
*SPLORT*
Ai did warn u!
Heer cums teh CCC
*sweep up teh braynez in a neet piel*
*skoop dem up an pore bakk in KKC’s hedd*
*pat pat awl tidee an replaes hedd bonez*
*lotsa ducky taep an a bavin cap*
Dere, haz dis chokklit possum an a drinkie an restawhile in dis floofee blankie. U will soon feel bedder, but doan’t luk at the kitteh agane!
Tank u!
*goes back to watching “Hocus Pocus” on teevee* Wan to watch wif me?
Dis kitteh!
WANT!
Him’s kyoot an preshus and habs tynee lillah towes an– an– an—
SPLORT
Sowwy. :blush:
OMG…tank goodness this is not a weekdae or we’d have a 9-elebenty emerge-encee hear of epic porporshuns….
*sweepy up Rattipuss’ braynes*
*plase them in, gently*
*tapey, extra tapey, more tapey*
*hug, blankit, choklit*
Rest, Rattipuss, an avvert yer eyz!
Fanks, Missy.
But may b umposible fer nawt 2 lukk at dis splorty lillah bebbeh.
::: noms dalishus choklit :::
Teh eyes, teh noze, teh toes!!! SNAP!!! SPROING!!! *CHRG wif doi goes flyin fru teh air* … SPLORT!!!
OMCC, splorts ebrywhere! We wading fru braynes! Whu wud thunk that tehre be so menny braynes heer? Awl responders, du NAWT luk at pikshur whyle purrforming reskooing! Hang awn, AfriCat, ai coming! Unless sumwun beets me tu it, taht iz…
CCC iz bizee, got tu du this manyuallee!
*finds nawt-sekkund-aid kit*
Okay, heer we go. Sweepee sweepee teh braynes intu pyle. Ai hope eberyfing ai swept up wuz yurs, AfriCat, hard tu tell in heer ryte nao. Washee washee wif teh distild watters. Pooooour back in teh braynium, n skwish taht last lil bit in tehre… did tehse all fitting befoar? Okay, nao we replays teh hedbones, an add teh turkois 50s baving cap wif pink n yellol flowrs. Nao, lots n lots uf dukky taype, around and around… an a CHRG wif drawings uv finashul graphs awn it, an moar dukky taype ober taht… Heer’s yur Chaazmap blankkit, ai tuks it around yu. Yu just sitting still an recobering. Having sum hawt chokklit an a chokklit moose, to helping yur braynes. Du NAWT luking at pikshur until full recobery, otay?
Oof! Fanks yu Prysma-kitteh! ai lieks teh chokklit mooses, … Yesh, ai fink ai’ll curl up unner teh nice blankee untill recubbered. (o dose toeses…)
Donut fink of teh toesies! Fink of teh tacks returns! Ai’m doing dis for ur own good…
Luks laik ai may need to eggsplayn teh particul fizziks again to taek peoples minds awf teh kewt! Nao, u has a particul, rite, an – um – sum udder particuls, an – er – u kind ob knok dem togevver an – well – stuff happens. Neckst week, teh kwantum feery ob relativitivitivity.
Dis is leik da feery ob da dinsores dat iz fin at wun en, much, much ficker in da middul an fin agin at da udder en?
Ahfinkso.
Bedder lay dwn.
LOL!
Toe pads!!!! Pinkie pinkie toe pads!!!! Uh oh, ai fink dis is gonna be a bad wun…SPLORTTTTTALISHUS!!!!
Pinkie pinkie toepads! Wiv eh prances and teh capers!
Uh oh: SPLORT
oops!
If ai wuz u, ai’d start by putting awn teh welington boots – we’re ankle deep in branes!!!
Ennybudy gawts a brayn-sorter? An sum hip-waders???? *sigh* Ai gess ai haz tu go inventing wun maiself, brb
*tinkering noyzes n mutterings*
*drags in masheen awn wheels n starts skooping brayns intu tawp uv it wif big plastic skoop*
*masheen maeking whrrrrring noyzes n starts prossessing brayncels intu free uv teh bukkits around teh bottom*
Aha! Okay, tihs wun smells like martoonies, so ai gess we can figgur owt whu belongs tu it… an tihs wun having orinj catfloof in it (it gets EBRYWHERE!) so mustest be Ambercat, so tihs wun mustest be jk2kitteh.
*runs around madly stuffing braynes intu brayniums an replaysing hedbones an adding 50s baving caps wif flowrs -eech wun diffrint!– an putting elebenty layers uv dukky taype ober it an adding CHRG (wdoi) an moar dukky taype*
Otay *pantpant* yu having teh blankkits and chokklit alreddy… tahts gud… *fawls ober*
Patz PK’s 4hed wif a little cloth to mop up da beeds of swet.
Good job Dr. PK. Here, pleeze to tayk dis box ov Happi Goggi Goggles to ensyurno more splortage.
Fank yew Dr. PK. Yew doin Yo, Man’s work today!
We interrupt this program for a public service announcement. There is a force 10 Splort warning in place in the vicinity of this thread. People should stay home, lock all their doors and windows, and under no circumstances should they approach the thread without taking full precautions. That’s CHRG AND duck tape AND fiftees bathing cap wiv flowrs. You are also advised to think of tax returns and sporting statistics. This announcement is for your own safety. Thank you for your attention.
Btw, I also has sum bery stinkee cheez in teh frijj an u is advised nawt to approach dat eiver.
iz tew laaaayyyytteee…..
SPLORT. aw shucks. lukkit, ai maed splortages… :-/
sumbuddy fetch teh mop!!! While we’re waitin for dem, here’s a sawftee floofy blankie an sum choklit. Doan wurry about ur branecels, we normally catches dem evenshully.
fanks… at diz poynt en mai lief, ai needz awl deh bwayn sells ai can haz!
too preevent teh splortz, fink uv teh stok markit!
ai’m finkin bout hello-weenie costumz. somebunny in skrubz pushin da CCC, peepz wif ducky tape on der heds an maybii a liddle braynez showin, lots ob CHRGs and fiftees baving caps wif flowerz…
skrubs? Ai can has Zach Braff? Plz? Ai’s been gud!
See hoo unnerstans it an sai “Yu is a ICHCer an Ai claym mai $5!”
yep, it wud onlee be phunny to cheezpeeps.
Yesh, dere is a slite risk dat u wud find urself in a secure instichewshun, inna room wif padded walls!
exuse-moi… did sommedy parle sumfing about Hallolween???
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Ahem, je can has votre Tenshuns s’il vous plait?
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Nous avons un Grande Halloween Fromage Partee onna Caturday Eve teh 31nd Oktobrrr… sil vous plait, scaree costooms esse… eshen… muss be worn!
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Merci Boocoo!
J’adore des parties de costume! Je serai là.
moi aussi!
I came. I saw. I splorted.
But the smell of your very stinky cheez brought me to my senses.
It is VERY stinkee. Maybe we shud add it to teh CCC for use in eggstreem cases.
Good call.
iz it teh stinkee bishop?
Nao, is teh non-denomnomnominayshunul cheez. It wuz Brie, but nao – ai fink it has evolved into a noo lief-form … *luks nervusly at frijj, which seems to be shakin slightlee*
Teh brie is brewed an has brort forf gnu lyf?!
EEP!!
I juss fownd sumfink in my frij wot luks like a small planet.
I finkso iz teh planet gorgonzola. Close relatib of the bloo cheez moon.
Sumwuns in tehre plain on a ladle, warin a coat ob roast beef..
Teh cheez – is ALIBE…
♫ Teh hills R alibe… ♪♫
♪♫Tehre be sumfing weerd in teh frij tuday, ai nawt no wut it iz… ♪♫♪♫♪♫
Grrr. *wabes fisties at Wierd sqwish!!!..
try agen..
EEP!!
I juss fownd sumfink in my frij wot luks like a small planet.
I finkso iz teh planet gorgonzola. Close relatib of the bloo cheez moon.
Sumwuns in tehre plain on a ladle, warin a coat ob roast beef..
Well, wadda yew noe.
WP Horks it up an spits it owt.
Maybe nebber liked teh stinkee cheez?
Whoohoo!!!
Iz a sekrit Halloloween monster in teh makin i fink.
U haz Stinkee cheez!? I lubs stinkee limberburger cheez.
*sneaks into teh frijj…NOM NOM NOM
Iz gud cheez martooni fanks
ob course martoonie! yu deserbz it, here, taek dis floofy blankee.
Fank u! Iz Zach rapped up in it? *hopeful*
yes i fink y’all mite need it to maek a comfee playce in da nawty barn!
*giglol* *runs awf wiv blankie an Zach Braff in teh direckshun of the nawty barn*
and dis litel pigy went home to mak himself a cheezburger!!
I will buy da piggie n da udder piggies n da vehikl dey wuz transportd in! Da hole kit n kaboodle.
Kyuu!!!!1
Dat is: Kyuute!1!
UH-OHES!! HAZ ANNEBUDDY SEED MAH TINFOYL HAT ADN JOO JANTA 2000 SUPER-CHROMATIC PERIL SENSITIVE SUNGASSES?!??!??
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AI….
AI………
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*woozled slumps agenst wahl.*
*droolz a liddul*
*littul doar in tawp ov woozleds hed opins*
*Littul stik popz aowt wif a pennant, whut sez “SPLORT”*
*moar drool*
Uh oh, woozled – ai is awn mai way to teh nawty barn wiv Mr Zach Braff, but while u is waitin for teh CCC (is bery bizzy tonite) heer is a floofy blankie, sum chocklit, an a leeflet abowt teh tacks returns. Ai recommend u study it closelee an do nawt, ai repeet NAWT, fink about pinkie pinkie toe pads.
Can… haz… Pan…galac…tic Gar……gleblaster….. plz?
Heer yu goes…
Take the juice from one bottle of that Ol’ Janx Spirit.
Pour into it one measure of water from the seas of Santraginus V
Allow three cubes of Arcturan Mega-gin to melt into the mixture (it must be properly iced or the benzene is lost).
Allow four litres of Fallian marsh gas to bubble through it (in memory of all those happy Hikers who have died of pleasure in the Marshes of Fallia).
Over the back of a silver spoon float a measure of Qualactin Hypermint extract, redolent of all the heady odours of the dark Qualactin Zones.
Drop in the tooth of an Algolian Suntiger. Watch it dissolve, spreading the fires of the Algolian suns deep into the heart of the drink.
Sprinkle Zamphour.
Add an olive.
Drink…but very carefully
Fank…… joo…
*gurglegurglegurglegurglegurglegurgle…gurgle*
*littul flagpole slowlee retraktx as PGGB taeks effect, door cloazes*
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*burp* skooz meh….
catnapp tyme naow….
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zzzzzzzzznoo…..zzzzzzzzzznooo…zzzzznnnnoooooooooo.
Duz nawt sawnd 2 B verry careful trinking!
Hmmm… ai fink ai’ll twy wun maiself, an den goe tu bed, ifn ai can still walk, dat is. *hic*
Duh duh duh duh dum, gud nite swee heart its tyme tu goe, duh duh duh duh dum, good nite swee heart its tyme tu goe, ai don wanna leev yu but ai reely mus goeeee!!!! Good … nite… swee heart, gud niiiiiiiiiiite!!!!
Gentlee playses HGGs on woozled and africat, juuuust in kayse.
like having yur hed smashed in wiv a brik wrapt inna slyce uv lemmin…
… nawt much bedder than teh splortz tehn, rite? :0
“…..and dis widdle piggy,” *pauses, wrinkles forehead*
“drat—ran outta piggies!”
I kin tutch mah feets! Looks!
SPLOORRRT IN 3….2…..*SPLOORRRRT*
didn maek condown finis
2 kyott..
Hey Ya’ll! Wat’s awl deh commontion?
I just chekin on the threads befor I goez to werk. I gotz tu drives my big ole truk tu New YAWK and …
Wait a sec!
I nebber did akshully luk at deh pikshure
Lemmie takez a luk!
OK OK a bebby kitteh. Dat’s cute.
OK OK deh bebbi kitteh is nommin its feetzes
Dat’s cute
Wat’s on the baby kitteh feetzes?
Uh oh…
Dems pink…
Dems toe padz!!!!
PINKY PINKY TOE PADZ!!!
I can reisit the urge to splort.
Iz a big tuf trukker and big tuf trukkers don;t splort…
Refuses to SLPORT
CAN’t … SPLORT>>>
Won’t …grunt… … \ugh… SPLORT
Ahhh heck!
here it goes
*SPLOOOOORT!!!!*
Dang!!
Nao I gunna be latez fer werk cuz me brainz is all obber deh floor!
HALP!!! *hic* HALP!!! *hic* Harmonium an 18wheelsandakitteh splorted!!! Ai canno *hic* halp dem becosn ai hasd a Pan Galoogoe Blaster Gargoil… oar sumfin… an ai cannot feels mah legz… *hic* HALP!!! *falls over* SNORRRRRRZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
P.S. plz nawt tu bee finkin dat ICHC iz enkorijin teh irresponsiblol use ov teh alkeehool!!! Plz nawt tu bee dwinkin an dryvin teh spaceships, k? kthxbyee
Yesh! We is only enkurijjin teh responsiblol use of teh alkeehawl. Plz try to nawt spill ur drink, kthx.
Sumbudy cawl 9-elebenty! Kwaranteen tihs fred! Kafleen being down tu! An Snippit still nawt been reskood! Woozle seem tu hav reskood alreddy bai PGGB. An ai haz nawt eben had tiem tu luk at teh pikshur maiself!
Wat little brainz I gotz lef in me hed remindz me AI LUVS Hitchhikers guide!!! Me favorite silly book.
And az long az Ai haz brainz lef I thinks I looks at the pretty pikshure agin.
FST!
Last of me brainz fallz out.
Oh darn. Nobuddy step rite der pleeze. Dems be mai brainz
*starts skooping awla brayns in site intu teh brayn-sorter masheen, tu at leest get teh awf teh floor an start figguring out what brayns go tugevver*
Yu may speereeunse odd sensashuns wif yur brayns in a bukkit, plz tu NAWT PANIC.
*finlee skoops up teh last uv teh brayns*
*sloshes watter around in eech bukket tu cleen, tehn dumps watters*
*treets wun cheezpeep atta tiem an maeks shur ebrybudy having brayns in braynium an hedbones be in playse an ebrybudy wearing 50s baving cap an lots n lots n LOTS uv ducky taype n a CHRG (wdoi)*
*staggers tu ty boo teek tu get map blankkits an chokklits fur ebrywun*
*luks around tu maek sure nawt miss anywun… wow tihs plaes needs mopping*
*fawls ober in eggsausted heep, tu tyred tu eben luk at pikshur taht coz all tihs mess*
Heer PK. U kin rest nao. *I rap ewe inna Cheezpeeps Map blankee, and tucky, tucky it rownd yer tired sholedares.* I mopz up. k?
Fank yu, Phat Cat. Ai nebber seen so menny splorts awl at wunse! *cuddles in blankkit an blinks at teh whirrld fuzzily*
LOL agin!!
An de truckr woz fonnee, 2.
MEEEOOOWWW MEEEOOOWWW MEEEOOOWWW!!!
Heer cums teh CCC
*sweep up teh braynez in a neet piel*
*skoop dem up an pore bakk in 18waak’s hedd*
*find awl teh peices ov skull*
*fink aobut makin a pirit flagg wif skull*
*dissides to put skull bakk on 18wwak insted*
*CHRG wDOI – drawings ov Lightning McQueen*
*lotsa ducky taep*
Dere, u can haz kawfee liek big tuf trukkers drink an a chonklit mousie. Rap up tite in floofee blankie. Nawt worree – I wont tell enneboddies dat big tuf trukker splorted!!!
Hi dere. Herez sum HGGs. Pleze 2 be sekuring deese ober i’s be4 halping ovvers. Fanks fer yer owtstandin publik serbbice. I award ewe wif dis martoonee and chokklit biskotti.
Kitteh arowbiks! “One an tew an chree an fore! C’mon, let’s work off those cheezburgers!”
Dis wittle piggy stayed at home. O teh memries
wow that is a kewt kitteh hope ya can make mor!
*donkee trots in innocently*
BOOM!
Oh, noes….I has added too teh deestrukshuns……
*woozlez an falls obbur*
oh noes! heer kafleen, hab sum chonklit (can donkees hab chonklit?) an a nyce blankee. awl dis eksitemint has maed mii sleepy.
ai’m gonna find a sunny spot and taek a nap.
dats sowns a most eggsullent iddeer. I willz too. U kins snuggle up too mah
warm tummy, cat.
18 wheels down…where deh krash kart wehn u needz it?
i iz noo round hear, so i iz lil confuzed…wut iz SPLORTS?
Head exploding from excessive cuteness.
Which can be controlled by a Chicken Head Rubber Glove, worn on the head, (wdoi) means with drawings on it to make it more effective, preferably with dukky taype to hold in place, and/or a 50s bathing cap, preferably with flowers and chin strap.
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The CCC is the Cuteness Crash Cart for rescuing people who have splorted. If you go here: cweenmj.wordpress.com/judsons-splort-repair/ you can learn more.
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Oh, and welkoning tu Cheezland! Watch yur step, we having a bit uv a cyootness krisis just nao…
and tank youz for da welkom!
Here PK. I gib u deze THBBs. (Theye Heye Brayne Bootz). Dese help keep ewe from slippin on awl da braynes wile ewe is dooin da rescuin. Hope dey halps.
aaahhh, nao i unnerstans! waell, in dat case i has a splort a long tyme ago!!
wut kyoot kittehs dere iz round dese parts!
Hm, n nao yu can unnerstanding teh, um, ded silinse heer…
Srsly, weekends iz kwieter. Ai herd sum peeps having… lyfs!!!
oops! lil comment problm dere!
Iz just WeirdPress being itself, nawt tu worrying.
BTW sarah21, rite at teh tawp uv teh paij, dere iz a grey bar wiv sebral yoosfull fings listid awn it. wun uv dem is lolspeak wikki (rite at teh rite!) an dat egg splanez awl sorts uv fings!
Ohai annipuss,
Here I alsow be gibbin ewe da THBBs. (Theye Heye Brayne Bootz). Dese help keep ewe from slippin on awl da braynes awl obber da flor.
dis stuppie werd press/tiemz awl crazzzy.
hmmm…p-k, yer last commintz waz not dere wen ai comminteded. CC halp!! dis iz awl screwzeled up.
aaaaw!!! cute kitteh! =D
mi tosis. your pink little tosis!
mee-ohsis?
Oh my gudness! Wut a mess. This is a test uf teh emergency splort recubbery system…an ai tink it nawt werking. You ppl hav overloaded teh system.
Call in extra support. Kitteh iz here to pass owt teh hot choklate.
http://www.mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=1281151
OMCC! You are habbin a splortashus kitteh to be handlin da splort recubbery? Dis seems like a dangerus pro C dyur!
Oh deer. I din consider thet. Let’s call in Dr. Tinycat tu halp. Oh, wayt, thet prolly nawt a gud idee eiver. hmmm wut tu dew, wut tew du.
ack!!! wittle pink toez…. ::clunk::
aaawww – liddle bebeh kaliko kitteh…ai shuld be immune tew dis kaliko cyootnis, luks liek our liddle Tira kitteh, but her maiks us splort awl teh tyme…jest kan’t stawp it…SSSSSSPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOORRRRRRRTTTTTTTTT!!!
Iz liddler dan Tira, adn sew cyoot, adn pinkie pinkie toepads….adn no CHRG gonna halp mii naow…SSSSPPPPLLLLOOOORRRRTTTTTT
eeewww, wut a mess
OMCC! Peepl STILL splortin here an nobodee tew halp tehm? Desper rat measures mus be taken. Rhhoooaaarrrr!!!! Heer comes teh Splort Technical Automated Recuvry Zamboni (STARZ) tu teh rescue. We may hav a little trbl sortin owt teh brains, but wif dis mess hoo kin be fussy? Iz callin in possum catering fer halp wif teh choklots an drinks. Nawt enuf blankets to go around. Heer, better build a nice big bon fyre to warm everybodee. Whew!
i used to do dat to my kid my little girl is growing naow
Sew meny splorts. So meny lols. Yew giz r grat at dis. *bows hed daown in rispek an adjorrashun* Sumdai ai hoping tew be jus haf as gud as yew.
*puts CHRG on*
awwwwwww pretty kittyyyyy *coochie coochie coochie coochie coochie*
and Sarah, don’t worry. It took me a while to figure it out, too. (aw cheez, forgot to turn lolspeak on lol)
We has a splort-record here? I gots my CHRG w/doi on, so I’s okay.