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No comment…
“Crap” does not even begin to describe it…
hmmm. Liszt?
Absoloooot waist 0 time
Big bag of mostly water (ref. anyone?)
Carp, er crap
D…
Ugly bag of mostly water = Picard. I forget which episode.
anyone else wanna take a stabaddit?
Home Soil?
Very Good! You wins! now, set Maus straight. Who said it?
Wasn’t it the Sheliak?
No no sorry. That was something else. My bads.
oooooo, da Sheliak. Wonders if dey are relative to da Vogons?
Nah, sheliak powitree b tollerubble…
you get credit for trying- go again…
The Velarans.
Now you’ve done it: you made me use GoogLol for a Trek episode.
heheheheh.
*collekts munnies frm peeps who placed betz*
It’s teh eppisoad where teh terraformers get attakded bai teh silicoan chippers in teh sands bcuz teh terraformers tukded teh watter layer frum teh sands.
Extra points for de tailed answer! You n Pwned go to da StarDrek Aisle 0 da Ty Boot Eeek & pik out sumfin. (ummm, avoid da melamine plates from China wif da pikshures o Data, Gynun, & Deanna. They have traces of milk in dem)
*snerk*
*snert*
*pretends to get teh joke*
*snertk*
Ha! Plates! Itz funny cuz itz troo!
well, teh starDrek stuff is teh funny onnitz own;
i wuz ref da melamine traces in Chinese milk/baby formula. ‘Parently de manufakshurerz put da melamine in to make it look “milkier”?
i dunno why da melamine was in da cat fud, dough.
It can fool protein content test to report higher percentages than are actually present. That is also why it was added to milk and infant formula.
Ok. I resind… recidivist… incinerate… I takes back my laffing now. I was teh happier not getting teh joke.
Oh, and BTW: “cat fud dough” would be a good name for a rock band but a bad name for a ice creem flavur.
Maus b rite — it fulez proateen testz, but it b addeded cuz dey bin miksin da milk wif wadder sew dey kin sale moar n mayk moar prophetz wiffowt havvin 2 reele by moar milk…
…
Sumwun neadz 2 let Kafleen givvem uh gud swifty kik 2 da nawgin wif herz noo goald dawn-key shooz…
yah. Eben te Cadbury mild choklit be contaminayted in places. Poisoning baby fud iz wun fing, but messing with the Sacred Chonklit iz sumfing else!
Dreck
Ecch
FAIL
G…
Doggie Doo
Elephant Effluence
Farklesnot
G…
Dung heap (see “C”)
Excellent tym fer a nap
F…
Goggie poo
Horse poo
Icky stuff
J
Just kill me now
Krispy Krap
Leitmotifs of Loserness
M…
just save Elektricity- turn it off!
kwazy stoofs
lotsa floofy paws over ears- can’t hear
m…
Joo reeeely don lyke himz?
Kaf (means garbage in Afrikaans)
Lurgy, dreaded
M…
Massive waste of space
Never any good
Overrated hack
P…
P.O.S.
Quack
Roadkill
S…
puhlees turn it orf
quiero silencio, por favor
rilly, no mas
surely yu can has better things to do?
t…
Tew stinkee
U nawt wanna heir dis
Very nawt kewl
Wanna skream
Xactly rong
Y iz he stil awn?
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Ai donut haz much to do — an plz to nawt be callin meh “Shirley.”
Star Trek the Original Series, episode 37, “The Changeling”. The Nomad
probe referred to humans as “ugly bags of mostly water”.
Well, it does sound like something Nomad would say, just after looking at Kirk and erasing Uhura’s memory, but not quite… you can still pick something out from the StarDrek area42, the stuff of questionabull value.
*this be bait for COOKIE’S HUMAN to tempt her to appear in high umbrage over the Kirk comment*
…—…
…—…
*sending oot SOS signalzto COOKIE’S HUMAN from b0rg enhanced tendrils which need maistenance*
hoping she’ll” take dudgeon” enuf to correkt me on my mixed frazes…
I am going to have to go watch that episode now. My memory may be
failing, but I could have swore that Nomad referred to humans
as bags of mostly water.
But if i am wrong, i am wrong.
report, Lt. scotsman!
ugly bags of mostly water. Star Trek!
muy bien: go to da Ty Boot Eek, and pikout a Nakshun Figure of Kowalski in da red shirt or anyfing else in da starDrek isle.
Iz not Dr. Phil – iz Dr. Phul. Dr. Phul, I don’t like myself when I do that. Dr. PHul sez:, Don’t do that! Brilliant!
Dr. Phail
IH SECONS DAT!!!!!!!!!!!
how’s dat working for you???
*click*
hee, that’s bettah!
Much better!
kitteh is protekting her’s humans from the psyko’s babble
dat guy get’s on kitteh’s laaaaaaaaaast nurv…
y duz ai heer alan parsons projekt n mah hed?
Ai alwuz heer alan parsons projekt n mah hed!
Ai want animlol planet
Ooooo! Shiney!
All 4 u, kitteh.
*LCB backs slowly away from teh one shiny thing she DOES NOT WANT*
ZOMG! bwing da thermomeetr fur da lcb!
Make that 2 shiny things I DO NOT WANT!
*runsawayfast*
*blink* nao eets 2… we needs halp fur da lcb… rly!
wer’s dr. tinycat?
O teh huge manatee. I wented to Urgent Care a few weeks ago for a nX-ray (I dropped some heavy swag on my bare foot – owchies) and teh TV in teh waiting room had this on.
U knoes… mabye they did it on porpoise to make peeps even sicker. Their deeviousness, they showed us it!
Dat’s amost az bad az mi laundri plac–dey is alwais waching Maury wen I go to doo da wash.
maybee dey hoapin peeps wud decyde dey nawt need cair baad enuff 2 sit & lissen 2 dis. ai sees in mai mind alla pashunts fleein ina panik!
er maybee peein inna flannik, dependin awn haow lawng de bean waitin!
okay…what’s a flannik?
I dunno, whut’s a flannik with u?
ai haz nao idee wat a flannik iz, mai fren at wurk, wen ebreefing iz goin wrong & wii r awl reddy 2 curl up inna corner in de feetal posishun alwais yellz “otay ebreewun, pee inna flannik!”
I gonna hafta remmemmer dis wun!!…..pee inna flannik….pee inna flannik…..hehehehe….
Like a beatnik but Latino so day likes da flan?
Spoonerism, folks…
pssssst-we cormtimewed teh starknsdormy nite storey sou yarted on “i can wait”
I dunno, whut’s a spoonerism with u?
Muthin nuch. Yow about hou?
u zactlee rite maus, iz a spoonerism.
lyke sayin “a blushing crow” stead uv “a crushing blow”
dis naow concluuds ur lekture, plees return 2 ur regularlee skeduled lols
Flannix, now on sale @spoonerismcom! Handy for long car trips and emujinseez!
yesh az ai tole mai gud fren teh udder day: I use to lib on teh corner uv spullerton and faulding…we bof laffed so hardz I almost pee inna flannik ..(wut u want? pea n pants no works for teh spoon stuff)
That remines me of anudder time I hadda go to Dr. TinyCat to give a urine sample. Teh lab waiting room was filled to overflowing, as was my urine-maker.
Handy Tip: U get moved to teh front of teh line when u says “O hai. I is here to give u a urine sample. Whut? I has to wait elebenty minutes? Well, lemme put it 2 u this way. I is reddy NOW. U can has my sample in a cup or IN MY SHOO. What’ll it be, hmmm?”
Oh, Hai, bluesfan473!
Ohai 2 u!
sup?
heeheehee! Akshly teh wurst iz wen yu iz waytin an waytin an waytin for de amneeo! Dey maykes yu drinkndrinkndrink an…waaayyyt… I wooda wisht I hadz a flannik den!
Ai hads 2 drink alot ov watur 4 a ultrasown wunse, an teh teck tolded mi ai had 2 mush in mi. Sew, him gibbed mi a cup an sed, go let owt JES A LIDDLOL!
It wuz hard 2 do, but ai manidjed 2 do it.
Nebber agin, tho!
oh dem foks bees so funneh sum tiems… doan dem? ai sumtiems twies 2 magin whut dem wuds bee liek iffen dem mus do dis… dem wud complain, aiz shure!
da worstest fing ai had 2 do wus swallowing sum kiend ob powder wib jes da littlolest gulp ob watur… a cup ob powder adn sum drops watur 2 “spills” eet daon… hahaha… so funneh… adn da doctur alwis seded ai shud do eet fastur… him habs noe tiem… der bees ottur patiens… yeah… go gulp eet urself doctur! eet wus da pleh 2!
ai noe liek docturs… mebbeh ai wud liek docturs iffn dem wus as kyoot as doctur tinycat…
Teh first time I hads one of those, I was At Capacity going in. Teh Dr. TinyCat was noo or something and very slooooow. She did a external then internal, then went to consult with someone, then came back with Dr. BiggerCat and when through both teh external and internal AGAIN before I was free to, well, go. U mite rember that: teh Flush Heard ‘Round teh Whirled?
Then I had another one a few years ago for teh same thing and after they did teh external they sed, “ok LCB, u can goes to teh potty now then come back and we’ll do teh internal.”
I sed “Wait, whut? Last time they did both external and internal — twice — wif me and my full bladder. Has teh tekneek changed since then?
They were horrificated. “O noes, LCB! U saw Dr. EvilCat befoar. U only needs teh full bladder for teh external.”
I hope Dr. EvilCat’s ultrasound machine always shows Dr. Phil.
noes, it alwais shows Dr Fill.
I can had a test where theywantedto see me pee to trace the flow with a machine. so they said here drink all this, nao wait … …. ……. nao yu can please pee in the bed?
.
.
.
i cuddent do it.
Did they have a technician put ur hand in a pan of warm wadders?
Then charge u elebenty-gazillion cheezburgers for “hydro-assisted bladder evacuation”?
three technicians, and none of them could get me to wet the bed.
Ai had teh saem “problum” wen ai wuz in teh labor. Dey wanted meh to yooz teh bedpan, but ai cuddint do it. No way, no-hao.
…
Plz to skyooz meh — gotz to go to teh liddul gurls’ room nao. NAO!!!
Yesterday I set up a drinking fountain dish thingy in teh kitchen for Esme and Liam. Then I spended most of teh afternoon in teh libbing room working on compuper stuff (I added some kyoot noo reading glasses to my stoar site! kthxbuy dot com) and all teh while I heared teh constantly trickling watters from around teh corner. I must’ve set a noo whirled record on trips to teh little lolcatburglar’s room.
Liam likes teh fountain dish because he has his own personal watter stream to bat at. Esme is kinda all “eh” about it.
Ai haz a sad- ai am a Dr Tinycat- ai hope ai am nevver so meen to mai pashunts!! Ai haz had the pleshure of having bebbehs and sum tests maiself- iz educashunal to be on reseeving end of sum of dese treatments sumtimes- duz make u much more symp..uh, simp.. uh, unnerstanding of ur pashunts!
i likes mai Dr tinyKatz – Cohen, rly …
They didn’t even tickle u until u pee?
Then charge u elebenty-gazillion moar cheezburgers for “digitally enhanced bladder evacuation”?
Ai iz prittee shoor ticklin wud nawt haz werked. Ai wuz … um … kinda grumpy frum bein tired & hazzin contrakshuns & hazzin to pee but nawt bein able to.
…
On a semi-related note (/lolspeak): I vaguely remember reading about some study someone had done. The researchers were offering the subjects cash munnies if the subjects could pee in their pants in front of the researchers. I think they were offering them $100 each or something like that — easy money for just peeing in their pants. None of the people could do it even though they wanted the munnies.
Wow. That potty training really stays with u, doesn’t it? Did teh researchers give teh moneys to teh subjects’ mommehs?
Dammit, LCB, youse maykin me laff sew much I’m about to shee in mai pooz!
*snerk* Dat sownds liek a purrsunul prawblum to meh.
U do that, RBF, and u has to give $100 to ur mommeh.
How’s dat werkin 4 ya?
Hai….i say dat 2 munch?
thx
(he tellz hoomans, “doan let kitteh rule teh howse!”)
shows himz stoopidtdee, kittehs roolz teh whirled, haus just innit.
Hu els shud bi in charj ‘sept da kitteh? Silly hooman.
he tellin peeps nawt 2 let kittehs rule?? Dr. Phil iz teh EEEEEVIL!!!!
I trained him well, didn’t I…
i think yu don’t want credit for that, EM …
Dr. Phull awf hisself, datz wat i be tinkin.
Blow up yur tv, play wif kittehs insted!
Yu get moar laffings n splorts.
an kittehs awlwaez rule teh howse…iz rule in kitteh handybook 101, aifinkso, yesh, ai shur.
kitteh do bettar talkshow – how 2 manaj problem hoomans for kittehs (soft claps by furry paws)
shut off the idiot box and play with me
I mush smarter than the bald guy anyway
and cuter too
and furrier.
and more cuddly
hjkshkjhdksdhkjsadjabkjb
fdgd
Deez izn’t mai thotz, dey’re mai cat walkin awn teh keyboard….
yu only think they’re not your thots …
O.o wowz…..Iz physic…sorta….O.O
mm hmmm.
oar your cat pwns yu.
>:(
Git reel Kevin, if u feel lyk a durtbag, its bcoz u r a durtbag. Sew jus pwn it, sai “I is a durtbag”
It probably makes as much sense upside down as it does right side up.
okay, burfday fairy haz snorted burfday party punch all ober herz monitor frum reeding teh stories ob habing to go bafroom at teh dr. offise. *wipewipewipe* okay, tehr,tahts better. heerz burfday fairy wishing a big HAPPEE BURFDAY to all teh cheezfrenz, lolfrenz, newbeez, lurkurz, an trolz hoo haz tehms burfdays today!!
!!11!! heer iz a ginormous elebenty layer caek, liek a wedding caek but iz for burfdays!! choklit (wif sum not-choklit layers if yoo duznt care for choklit), frooty fillings, an fudjy frosting (eggsept sum layerz haz kreemcheez frosting if yoo prefers taht), dekoramated wif kandles made ob kandee so yoo kan eet tehm!! an frooty party punch (dont drink it right before yoo reed dis thred), shiny party hats, an goodie bags wif kandees, yoyos, liddle rolly-ball maze puzzels, an sparkly kitteh stickers!!
an hugs-an-kisses!!
XX OO XX OO ЖЖ ΘΘ ЖЖ ΘΘ XX OO XX OO ЖЖ ΘΘ ЖЖ ΘΘ XX OO XX
X OO ЖЖ ΘΘ ЖЖ ΘΘ XX OO ЖЖ ΘΘ ЖЖ ΘΘ XX OO ЖЖ ΘΘ ЖЖ ΘΘ X
O XX OO ЖЖ ΘΘ ЖO XX OO ЖЖ ΘΘ ЖO XX OO ЖЖ ΘΘ ЖO XX OO ЖЖ
Jujmentul kitteh iz jujmentul.
hi i love is site !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the pics are soooooooooooooo funny i wish my kiten TILL was dat funny but shes agraphobic
Oh hai and welkum bif!!! Ai lubz dis site, too, and dere is awlways so menny naice peeps to talk 2!
OK, still no sign of leeza-b. The ninja squad (frum preevyous thred) better be gettin ready to go in fer teh resqkew.
let’s revyoo the plan.
*wispers*
hoo has teh plan?
ai thot yew had teh plan.
no, yew sed yew would bring it.
the goggie ated it?
aliens…see the “i can wait” thred…
Leeza-b *mite* be holdin teh plan, aifinkso.
but, but, but … she’z teh one been held priznur at twerk. How we can has rescue if she has teh plan?
*aha!!*
ai noes. We makes a plan to retreive the plan.
We start by
.
Attacking teh lock on back door
Breaking the window in the basement
Climing in through the skylight
D…
Designating a Driver to
Evacuate the building so that
Fyremens can help LCB to…
G…
Grab the keys to the elyvator
Hijack elevator to leeza-b’s floor
Infiltrate the work area
Just in case, wear the rubber masks (goggies)
K…
Kill teh oppozishun wif teh kindness…
Let teh sun shien in
Maek faces at awl teh peepulz dat maeks moar munniez den we duz.
N…
Ninja our way in
Obligate them to let our leeza go
Penetrate enemy territory until it really hurts
Q…
Queschun teh illegal holdin uv our leeza.
Rekwest dat leeza be releest immediately (if nawt soonur)
Sieze leeza wen teh bosses izzint lookin.
T…
Threaten them with litigation
Ululate outside their windows
Violently practice pacifism
Waltz rite in, grab teh plan, then cha-cha out
X…
X-ray specs, wear them
Yodel inside their windows
Zamboni as a getaway vehicle (not so grate, ackshually)
X-ycute the plan
Y not?
Zenith of our ninjaness …
*grabs leeza-b’s boss and puts him inna sack*
*putz sack in “out” box*
*fastens rope around leeza-b*
*shoots grappling hook wif crossbow*
*swings out window holding leeza-b*
umm.
the peeple-catcher thingy.
did sumwun bringing it?
umm?
ummm?
hello
*echoes hello hello hellooooo*
peeple-catcher thingy?
Disapproving kitteh is disapproving.
Mai kittehs luvs TV. *sighs* De hed vets sai too mush TV can maek a kitteh sykotic…siko….crazee! Ennywai, if it maeks kittehs weerd, wut does it do to hoomans? MMMM.
can do very stranje things to hyoomins. Nawt-secund, it destroys their bility to spell. Second, makes them spend time awn pyooter, sending messajis to kittehs. Third, they begins to wurry about getting abatars and blooness. Finalee, they begins to find that they has ritten “ai can has results” in a purrfectly good sine-tific report.
TV nawt be reesponsibul fur taht! Ai nawt has a TV.
Must be sumfing else taht being teh reezun.
oh, but the airwaves are bean receiv’d by the murkury fillinks in yr mouf. iz insideeyus, ifinkso.
fr instants: right nao i aer on da tredmill. da tredmill haz elektoniks. da elektronics catches da broadkast TB airwaves if i duzn’t engage da inertial dampers.
I eats teh Heisen Burgers to keep the fillings from bean receptors (because the waves never know where the fillings are. at any particle time)
Gottid?
But ai haz no fillings.
i aer impressed. envious, also.
Ur uncertainty principle sounds very uncertain to me
Ai lurvs teh Cheezland!!! Srsly! how manee peeps hav ever hurd ov teh Heisenberg’s uncertainty, an heer peeps toss it arownd liek a kitteh wiv a floofy mowse toy! R peeps heer teh awsum or wut????
Ohai AfricCat. Ai has not forgottened my task of finding out teh troo story behind Heisenbergur, Schrodinger, et al. Just too many things atwerk, and … oooh, shiny ….
O hai Purrrfesurr Phillipe d’Beaker. As teh antidiluvians wud say: Noe warries mate! Ai reely fink dis is wun ov teh bestest edumacated sites awn teh entyre intertubes!!! Yep, aifinkso!
Wuz da antidiluvians da peeps dat held da sit-in protests abowt da fluds before Noah floted away in da ark wif all da animolols?
Wut AfriCat sez! YAY 4 cheezland!
Hay, guies….
Leeza axked mi 2 tayle u taht hur iz habbin trubblols postin heer, an nawt kwite shure whai. Hur sed hur wuz werkin onna problum an hoeps 2 b bak agin soon.
kthxbai.
Mebbe owr taktikz higher on teh paij is halping!
Free Lisa Nao!!! Free Lisa Nao!!! Free Lisa Nao!!! Free Lisa Nao!!! Free Lisa Nao!!! Free Lisa Nao!!! Free Lisa Nao!!! Free Lisa Nao!!! Free Lisa Nao!!! Free Lisa Nao!!! Free Lisa Nao!!!
TVOD – yur doen it ryte.
O Hai PdB! Dat’s awl troo! Such an affect awn da hoomans! Mehbe majer evil lootion change? An kittehs be smarter dan da hoomans caws dey doan watch da TV as mush!
test
Visible!!!! Yes!!!!
Fat gye wiff musstassh
andz verreh takkee Hoamurr
Simpsun Koam~ober
Dayrz 2 tellz peepz how
2 libbz?!!!! Shoodz fynf wurkz inz
delleekatessen
Fat gye wantz 2 tellz
snawt noazd brat dat lyfe nawt sukks.
Brat shoodz getz a jawb!
Dokkturr Fill?!!! Wutz him
Dokkturr ubz? Cant’z beez dyett
oarz fillawssofee
Jack.
ebbery tiem yu post dr.paedophil picture on ichc CC kills a kittehn. fink ob deh kittehns !!11one
haha
i hate doctor fill if you agree with me please friend request me bye bye bey bye bye bye bye bye bye i love saying bye
dat lewks leik bassmeant kitteh uul downsyed oup tinxin.. seeyring cat sais to duckter pill thesis one heckouva luuung ryed duide.. sumdaee somewarez kittehz geyt it er undarstundz thesis alieyn teevee stouf or tri fer dumbselves.. scyientest kitten fyendz scyientest kittehn and gnu layteonship beygrins, deh wehl mayke sooper scyientest kitteh/n.
lawlz I HAVE THE SAME EXACT TV!!
Y U HAS A VHS?
got to hab a VHS cuz master kittehs lieks playn widda tapy stuf insied — da deeveedees don hab dat and spinny sparkelies jus last so long