now take a deep, cleansing breath

now take a deep, cleansing breath and slowly slide your front paws forward
picture: Romeow. lol caption:
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now take a deep, cleansing breath and slowly slide your front paws forward
picture: Romeow. lol caption:
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
Yoga kitteh!
Doorstop: yer doin it rong!
Hey! That’s Romeow! Hurray!
oh yes it ar Romeow!
Gud fur yoo Maus!!!! Ai offen
dont luk!! An menee felicitayshuns awn yur VERREE precise nawt second!!
ROMEOW DID THE PICKCHUR AND THE CAP!!1 YAY!! >
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But hao wunderful!!! Our OWN deer ROMEOW!!!
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LUK EBREEWUN!!!
ow wow!! yay romeow!!!
Oh my goodness!!!
I can’t beleef iz troo! Diz iz mah La Luz kitteh! I doan kno hoo catshuned it.
.
Iz so funneh cuz I put dis pic up fur onwee bout a haff hour. I waz putting up otter pics, and I didn’t fink dis won was so grate, akshully. Waz taekin wif mah fone camera, and La Luz wasn’t brushed owt. So, I took the pic off.
Wat a wunnerful surprize to see her on teh front page! I neber in mah life fot dat one ov mah bebehs wud be on teh front page!
*duz an xtra speshul happy danse*
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Fank yew to hooeber caem up wif teh catshun.
.
I habn’t read teh rest ov teh comments yet…but let meh sai dat La Luz iz mah nawt second “round” kitteh, and she iz on a diet. OK, let teh comments fly!
KonKatULayShunz, Romeow!!! Adn deh lubblee La Luz wif deh snorgulishez belleh fluff!!
Tell La Luz that Ant LCB sez “Round is a shape.”
Fanks LCB – La Luz and Romeow boff feel better, nao.
Conga rats awn ur beeyouteaous kitteh being awn teh front pag. Eye wood liek 2 snorgul awl her floofiness. She iz lubbely kitteh aifinkso.
Oh fanks, big-gladys!
La Luz iz a thinker kitteh. Sumtiems, I fink she’s smrter den meh.
Mah TJ, in mah avatar iz a doofus kitteh. Awl hims finks bout iz teh next fun fing.
Ommmmmmmmm, concratz Maus onna tawp spawt! An Carosue an Valesa foar a brayde! What r wii doin theez dayze foar drinkz and danzin?
ZF! Good to see you! How about a polka!
*Grabs ZK and twirls her around*
Aannnd….
♫♫♫
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
♫♫♫
*Repeat until dizzy and/or exhausted*
♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫
♫♫♫
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
One two three and
♫♫♫
*hic* huff puff I hazznt had a polka that gud sins I wuz 25! Fankyew foar teh danse, Mausie!
Yer welcum. So… you hasnt polka-ed since last week? That’s not so long…
BUT. Hooz thsi “ZK” u iz dancin wif, eh??
ohai, ZF! So glad to c yu!
Haz yu met KCTailkinker yet? Also a fren ov teh floot.
Ohai booklion!!!!!!!!!! No, I hazznt met menny noo cheezpeepz– nawt been heer foar awyle! The moar flootz teh bedderer, sez I
We haz missed yu, zf! Yu haz bin awai too long.
Awwwwwww…..I haz missded ebberywun heer tew. I will try tew be bakk moar, Ifinksoyes!
Sry. My incompe… umcampe… bad typing. Let me show you it.
Jumpin in wif a meesij from leeza-b. She iz inbisible again tuday, and finks she haz been blokked frum posting at work. She sends her bestest to evverbuddy here,
nd if ennywun haz ideas about a reskew mission, please to post!
*vrrrrrrrrrrmmmmmmmpurrrrrrrrrrrr*
*jaguar pulls to a stop on a darkened street*
*door opens*
*swayve, yet somhow familiar figyur steps out*
*dressed all in black*
*removes black duffel bag from trunk*
zipppp.
hmm, lets see.
grappling hook … check
nylon rope … check
crossbow … check
semiautomatic automatic semi … check
sordid rubber masks … check
rubber chicken? wtf?
martooni shaker … check
knight to queens bishop 4 .. check
hmmm
ok, we’z ready. reskew mission underway
Leeza! We mus sabe hurr!
yes yes! we must saves her b4 teh inbivisibilitee turns her into nawt ther at awl. !
ile help provide teh distrackshun!
Let me know if I can help! I wouldn’t have anyone to
pestertalk to if Leeza wasn’t here…Ai gets ninga sute tu. Au can coem wif?
frum yer abatar, yew alreddy has teh ninjasoot. Here. Take this bag wif … letz see … big rubber bands, baseball bat, fruit bat *flap flap flap* hey watch out!! , dozen bananananana peels, and sordid instruments of burglary (we needs LCB for this mission)
*♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫*
*Provydez lowd pinkolo* moosik tew disstrakt teh meaniez who iz holdin Leeza hostaje*
*Pinkolo: sordid WMD, er, instrument ob mass, er, distrakkshun
Ai lieks da rudder bans!
*shows you da shootin skillz*
*hits fruitie bat in da hed*
*wach him sprial down*
Dis gret fun!
ohai guiz… fanks so much for teh reskew efforts.
I has been emailn the cheesez but so far no lucks.
I had one commint slip thru late afternoon, and nufffin else.
But for some reeson, I can commint from home.
Anyways I was reedin ur efforts and going I’M HEER!!!
But no one cud see me.
*sniff*
Hope they figures it owt soon.
I lefted a msg for maus but he didn’t see it yet…
But- do any of u offishul geek wpoi-waring guiz think my werks could do something to prevent me from comminting?? Or do u think it’s just werdpress??
*waves* tu hers gud cheezfren leeza-b.
Fanks fur da updat booklion!
Leeza-b, ai has a sad 4 u dat u again cannawt partissipayt in teh comminting fun. Ai trooly hopez teh reskew mishun is zakessful.
ai fink tyes uv moer den two be hear-bye noen az “con-Cat-in-a-shuns”
Ai’s bac from trip an redee tu play wif my cheezfrens fur a littel bits
Oh hai, midnightsdeer! Is nice 2 C u again. How r u doin?
Ai very gud upfi! Fanks! Mai tu kittehs dey r very happi ai coem hoem frum mah trips! How iz awe da fings aroun hear?
Ohai midnightsdeer! I haz tew go nao, but happytayle tew see u!
Ew has a Happy Cat Day!
and don’t forget to relax your tail and breathe
Conga rats awn ur nawt-sekkung braid wif carosue and teh intrepid Valesa, Remy’s wunnermus caretayker. Wot wud u laik 4 sillybrashun? Sum Germun beer? Umptah moosic? Or sumfink moar refined?
*luks at Maus eggs pect antly*
*sownd ov eggz peckin in bakkgrownd*
*cue orfstayje antz*
*giglol* Dis is nawt quite wot ai had in mynd … but wot a lubberly imadgeenashun u has, zauberflolute!
Reminds me of an old cartoon (probably Tex Avery or Warner Bros) where the ants carry off an entire picnic, inclusing IIRC the people.
I bin lookin awn u-toob an awl I found was “Ant Pasted (1952) Warner Brothers”
Nommessdai. Teh nu dai ob teh weeek.
Until you falls on yer face
Teh cat vurshun of *headdesk*?
and iffn yu falls into a leefy thing- iz kalld a *faseplant*
That’s Remy! Since he can’t use his back legs, he’s always sitting up like that! Too cute!
Ohai, Valesa. Schmoos to yu and Remy.
Valesa, wii cahn hav Remy updayte? Haow iz he (an u) coping? *Shmoos 2 Remy*
yesh, ink wiring mynz wanna noes…
BuddhaCat
rub belleh fer luck
iffn u bees lukkeh enuff u noe will gets scratchd
Monochromatism.
I haz it.
teh art ob matchin yor decor to yor cats, heer purrfekted.
(dis iz inside romeow’s howse, i beleeb, wher i haz been! iz reely dis pretty an clean an birght inside!)
Wat a purty kitteh! Ai lubs whyte kittehs.
Ai can has snorgle snorkel? Dat belleh iz jes 2 irreziztublol.
Luk at the credits. Taht be Romeow!
Ai bleev ur rite, Maus!
Haz ennybodee seen Romeow latelee?
Romeow maed a breef commit teh uvver dai – in teh lass week enniwai.
Ohai, rhsb. Romeow uzually shows up later in teh day, sins she libs in teh west.
She haz bin bizzy doing gud werks.
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She’s werking awn the campagne staff fur wun ov peepl running fur office AND she’s volunteering under teh wurst circumstances at an animul shelter.
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She’s doing heroic werk. She maeks us awl verree prowd. We ar moast priviledgred to call hur ar frend, ai think!!
yah, i bin e-mayling wif her, cawz i keeps her up-to-date on how happycat iz doing. taht shelter is teh MAJOR PLEH!! tehy don’t care abowt trying to find foreber homes for teh pets. iz almost liek tehy iz opposed to it, gets in teh way ob tehm doin tehr jobs. ifinkso, her haz also had teh inlaws for a vizit, which sownds like very much WANT! becawz tehy wuz going to do sum fun fings togevver. soher iz a very bizzy romeow.
ifinkso her must… her also maeks teh wurld’s bestest oatmeel-chonklit chip cookees! a lady ob many talents, iz owr romeow.
Oh fank yew Janet and Lunarmommy fur teh kind wurds.
Yes, teh shelter is teh Major PLEH – espeshully today.
Mah sweet Jasper, dat waz teh nawt second kitteh I putted on Petfinder waz “gone” today. *sniff* Heer iz hims video. He waz teh sweetest boy.
http://www.petfinder.com/petnote/displaypet.cgi?petid=12009241
Also “gone” today waz 8 otter kittehs. *sniff sniff*
It waz an upsetting dai, so seeing La Luz on teh front page was purrfect timing.
ooohhhhh, romeow…. i haz a sad for u and for jaspurr an teh otter kittehs. hiz videeo luuks lyke he wuz a lovely kitteh.
ai am prowd uv u foar dooing whut u doo foar awl thoze animals at teh pleh shelter. ai donut think ai cud doo it — ai cud nawt go bak day after day, wundering whut ai wud fynd, an ai prolly cud nawt sleep at nite. yoo r amayzing.
{{{{{romeow}}}}}
{{{{{jaspurr}}}}}
{{{{{shelter kittehs}}}}}
Fanks tessm.
I kno hao mush mah kittehs add to mah life, and so meny ov teh shelter kittehs r as grate az mine. They cud maek sumbuddeh SO HAPPEH, but they get killed instead. Jasper was already “tutored.” He was a big 10 pound strong boi dat waz playful and lubbing, and sweet. He was eben gud wif otter kittehs. Wat a shame. He’s playin in the Princess Mu Meadow.
U iz doing bery important work Romeow
I haz a proud to knoz Uz
and concats on getting on deh frunt page
that ar alwaiz a gud feline
{{{Romeow and all the kittehs she wurks so hard fur}}}
Hims almoss az famos az da HappyCat!
… slowly slide your paws forward,
focus all your attention,
and then …
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Attack the anchovies
Bite the biscuits wif gravie
Chomp the cheezburger … chomp it ai say!!
Devour the donuts (speshully teh wuns wif white powdered sugar, willnot show awn yew)
E …
Eet teh edibles
Fill up on teh figs
Gnaw thru teh gorgeous chocklit cayke
H…
Eye the chicken on the counter
Fight for the fresh shrimpz
Gorge the toona
H….
Hork up a hairball
Injest the gooshie fudz
Jockey for more nipz
Katerwaul fur brakefust
Lick the milk saucer
Munch on the kitteh crunchies
Nom the cheezburger
O..
Omnom teh ornjez
Purr ur way froo teh popsikkelz
Quietlee nom teh queeshez
Rampayge froo teh Rufflez
S…
Obliterate teh onyun rings
Pwn teh peeecan pie
Quieeeetly qweep up on teh quince jelly
R…
Rassle teh roast beast
Steal teh savoriest stuffs
Takkle teh trout
U….
Undermyne teh uglifroot (weak, I noez)
Vokalyze abowt teh virgin marys
Whayle away awn teh watermillion
X… heh heh heh
Undo de ribbonz on de packeges
Verify derz plenty of gushifud
Wunder ’bout de fly on de wall
X-amine de pointy enz
Yawn deeplee
Zz.z.z.z…tiem 4 another nap
FTW!!!!
*sound of flooffee paws clappeting* ** ** *** ***** ** ** ****
A troolee bravura purrfomance bai awl an verree brite spot in mai day!!
ohai JCH4k fanks, takes a bow
who is deh kitteh on Ur abtaar?
Yep – wuht Janet sed!!!!
*floofly paws clapping wildly*
PB2K!!! u is back from the horse spital! How lubberly! Hao r u? Feeling ok, ai hopez.
PB2K!!!!!!!!!!! Schmooz an hedbonkz!!!!!!! I keep prayin foar helthth foar u!!!!
Ohai upfi an ZF!!!
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Yah, I iz hoam frum horsespital — I’z awn Day 55 nao, an eberyfing iz going well. Mai lappytop died a cuppla weeks ago, so I’z bin orflien an goin thru cheez-wifdrawal!!!
.
I’z missed yoo awl bery bery bery much!!! Hedbonkz an schmoos to bof ov yoo!!
HEY!! PB2K AND zauberflolute!!
*hedbonks* *hedbonks*
Ai’ve mist yoo bof!!! Reelee lifts mai spirits to see you!!
Oh hai PB2K!!!
Grate to see u again!
That iz “Violetta’ frum Verdi’s LA TRAVIATA – furst akt! Bai the GRATE Snadra Boynton.’
She iz about to sing teh fey Maus “Drinking Song” (Libiamo
Dat wuz de nawt sekkond aria dis diva lernd. Very wunndreful!
Tankee to Janet and to Phillippe! Ai guess I was inspird to alphabetize B4 goin 2 de home 4 old bureaucrats (de office).
ah wunderz: duz yoguh kitteh do “me/cow” poze?
Dunno … mabbeh if yoguh kitteh noez wat me/cow poze is? Ai dunno … but ai noez dat ai dunnoes Average Jane, sow ai sez hello, Average Jane, and welkum. Ai can haz u as fwend?
Teasel…why iz Cotton doing de Pilates?
Nawt Cotton! Maibe herz kussin? Cotton iz slimmerer an trimerer!
Eggshersizes bai chasin teh burdies an teh mausies!
U dunt needz no Pilates and air obics iffn u chase teh burdies and teh mousies (but nawt teh MAUS).
yep, kuz wen chasin teh Maus, yu hasta jump and leep and do gimnasticks… and ware suspenders.
Suspenders?
yep.. to keep teh pantz frum fallin down (itz hard to do gimnasticks wif a belt awn- kuts awf teh breevin).
Oops! Ai meaned mousies! Nawt Teh Maus, or eben Teh Ebil Maus wud Cotton tanglol wiff! Sew sry tu teh Mauses fur eeny missunderstandings!
test
Dis feelz nais an awl, but wen b part wayr we eet teh yogert?
hav sum modesty, kitteh. kuvver ur harbls
naow breeve an relax. strech ur toesies an ur nosies, Lissen 2 dat small still boice inna ur hed sayin…
.
.
.
IZ TYME 2 FEED DE KITTEH!!!
an now get up an go MEOWMEWOMEOWMEWOMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMOEW an skratch at evreefing an rub arownd yor hyoomin’s legs until tehy trip an fall ober yoo!
ARG! Waked up to da twin meludeez uv fone reengeeng an hopperchoppers rawreeng oberhed!
Frenz callin to see if we’z ok, well, I spose… Den we went owtside an – EEK! Flaymz iz vizibull et da end uv R blawk! Still bowt a mile away, an still blowin away, but we stayin home toodayz! I went owt an wadderd ma dirt. Hubbee bin froo dis b4, he sez too erlee to wadder da hows yet. But I still wadderd stuff, cuz it’s blowin!!! Et leest R ayr is kleer becuz da winds….
owtch… dat sowns scareh…
ai hoep u noe will sees da fyr 2 close… ownleh da fyrmens shud be up close adn purrsonal… u noes?
{{{{{onceajinx}}}}}
Hmmm, yeah…. *droooool* Mebbe I kin cunvince dem to be YNGs cuz dey need a showr?
Herd yesserday dat we has a noo numbrr – callin 211 will giv info on fyrs in LA, an evaq8shuns an stuff. Iz a good ting! Der iz mennee horsies down da blok, so I iz hopin dey R alreddee et da collij an sayf!
O noze, dat souns de skaree! Doan u fink u shud evacuate? Ur safetee haz 2 cum furst! *beems beems beems gud hoaps & wishes fer safetee*
Well, we hazent bin giben da alarm, but we has evreeting in a pyle reddee to pack. My Fadder in LOL is in town tooday, so we has an eckstra car, an he noes whar da inshoorinse paypurrs is!
We also has da “reberse 911″ sistem, wher da polees will call us! So we waitin… Iz nebber dull momint rown heer!
Prayin fur yu an yours, onceajinx. Bee safe!!! K?
Keeping everything crossed for you, onceajinx. Take good care.
ooh skary!!
i haz a wurry abowt yoo! yoo get outa tehr az soon az tehy tellz yoo, or sooner if yor instinks tell yoo!!
Oh! I love this kitteh! :3
iznt he purty!! so kleen-shiny-wite an floofy!
downward kitteh?
well, is nawt downwurd goggie, fer shur!
Oh NOES!!
I seed dis dis morning before work and thot, when Romeow gets home she will see it and say which kitteh dis really is, her namesake, ROMEOW, or mebbeh La
Luz or TJ.
Butts, no.
WARE ARE YOU ROMEOW???!!!
I dansdansdans for your fabulus picture!!!!!!!
Which kitteh r dis?????????
*waits brefflesslee
*gives kafleen oxeygin*
o tank(s)!
*Gives kafleen 2 hydrogens*
Now u has a watters!
Oh hai, mah Dawnkee Fren!
Fank yew muchlee fur teh heds up on La Luz’s pikshur!
I doan kno iffs I wudda eben seed it, iffs it weren’t fur U!
Ruff dai, todai. Fanks fur maekin it shiny.
Iz felin lik teh kitteh sumtymz…only wey to seez feeties!
Holy Harblz!!!!