O hai. iz praktisin mah CPR.
dis kitteh needz sum moar praktis.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: Emily
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“Out with the bad air, in with the good”
Don’t come any closer, or the orange thing dies!
HA!!1!! Teh orinj fing can’t die! Itz poisun!
*ahem* da ornj kittehz aer not poyzin (unless yu getz blarghed by da kyute)
iz da ornj Mauses dat be poysin.
kthnxbai
http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/2007/06/25/teh-orange-ones/
See? tole you so.
teh cute CAN be hazardous to ur helth, tho!
Tell sweetpea I’m trying to get hur a viney oranj kitteh pic- if onlee teh kitteh wud hold still!
Luuk owt! Itz onlee moastlee ded!
‘Skewse mii…. I haz a nownsmint tu posting…. I noes it b
rupet… rupeet….. sed bfrour, but I think it b relative tu ur intrests.
.
Cheezpeepz Wantid
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Wii wanting 2 gitz awl deh Cheezee Peepz on deh Googlee map! Adn wii wanting to hab Cheezee Peepz on awl deh kontiee nentz! If u b reeding dis, u shud beeing on deh map.
.
Wut map? u asking. Dis map:
http://www.maps.google.com/maps/ms?ie=UTF8&hl=en&msa=0&ll=44.412202,-92.823486&spn=0.847561,1.763306&z=9&msid=103775879896697322828.0004573f951750ea89599
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How I git on dis map? u asking.
Sending an emayo to: cweenmj@gmail.com awl I needz iz ur ICHC name adn ur lokashun. Deh lokashun can b az exact or az vague az u b liking 2 protekting ur privacy. i followz ur wishes. Dere awlso b ruum for a comment if u wanting to say ‘Oh Hai’ oar sumfing.
.
I putz on enneewun woo asking. Eben lurkerz. Adn trollz. I haz put on a cuppla Lurkerz awlreddee. I don’t fink ennee trollz b dere, but I will putting on ennee wun hoo askingz.
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Dis b a nawsum map — so gud to seeing ware deh cheezpeepz b… It b nise fer da peepz hoo wanting 2 meeting uzzer cheezpeepz.
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wii now returning u 2 ur regular commintz.
it IZ a nawsum map! luuks lyke a lotta werks!
all hayl teh cween!
oh mai! 1,998 viewz onna cheezpeep map!
taht’s awlmoast as manne as u gots frenz!
O mai! U get up at 5:30am to read lol kitteh funny stuff?
This b an OSSIM map! Grate idear, cween!
Dis is teh kuulest map in teh youneeverss! It is wun thing tu see sumwun say ohai, ai am frum TTI, but another tu akshually see that cheezpeep pointer awn teh map!
Thank yu cweenmj foar duing this!
ai jus want tu put in a plug foar making sure tu get awn teh map!
it is so grate akshully! it iz wun thing tu say yu oar frum TTI, and sumthing totally different tu akshully see yur cheezpeep buddies awn teh map!
Dont delai! Cawl tudai!
Plus if yu akt nao, a grate set of ginsu nives!
Jumping in rite heer to say Happytail congratz to teh merrie Nawt Seconders.
.
An they ar. . .
Maus
two_kittehs
annipuss
bluesfan473
leeza-b
Plasticat
Appers to bee another double brayd. HAO festive!!
Ai’m serving sum reelee fragrant Fronsch Press Cawfee up heer. Creem, shugar, dmarara shugar oar spenda. An choklit sprikuls (thank yoo, Maus) maed frum shaved Suchard milk chocolate!!
It’s Friday. Let’s put out the Katlua and the Irish Whiskey and the Devonshire Cream too…
{{{{{Maus}}}} Ai think ai cud uze sum of that! Ai think we prollee awl cud!
wot? no sham bored??
NO! YUCK!
U no likes razzberrie?
Not in coffee… *shudder*
Irish coffee inna morninging – yummy!! Butt nawt onna wurkdai
Aw, c’mon! Live a little!
Yeh maus, c’mon live a little!
*holds out bottlol of sham bored*
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
itz full of aunty oxidents
and bite a man C!
goez gud in hot choklit 2
try it… you’ll liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike it!
Thanks! I like Chambord, just not in coffee.
*Gets out a bottle of Veuve Cliquot*
Let’s have some Kir Royales!
don’t make me go burma shave on u!
ok that’ll werk!!
*holds owt sham pain floot*
oh, yu knoe what’s good in sham payne? A dolop ov Canton Ginger! We shudz haz sum in honor ov all teh gingery cats we haz hadz re-sently
Some Chambord…
And fill with champagne…
(Someday we’ll need to get some realpagne…)
*GlugFizzGlugFizzGlugFizzGlugFizz*
There you are! Enjoy!
Careful, leeza-b. Yu nebber noes whut Maus mite haz slipped into yr drink.
♫♪ tinee bubblols… ♫
*sips*
MMMMM.
Oh I fink we has seen some reel pain here befores…
oh not maus!
EM maybee.
but I hasn’t seen him around todays.
I locked him in his room before I came here…
*Muffled yelling and door-banging in the distance*
*EM hears snickering in teh distanse*
Shampayn an shambord wud be a Kir Imperial, Kir royal is shampayn and crème de cassis (black currant), de mûre (blackberry) or de pèche (peach)
Picky, picky, picky. I was a bartender in a snooty restaurant *mumblemumble* years ago, and we used Chambord for Kir Royales. STN!
Well – THAT certainlee splains a lot! Ai wuz wundering. . .
(psst, mai ingorince, ai show yu it nao.. what meaning “STN”?)
“So There! Nyah!”
Sticking out your tongue is optional…
Fankies.
hee hee, i fot i saw an EM puddytat. Hmmm. Nawt so much nao.
Maus, u donut hab to aks mii twi…2c…tew tiems.
Onest occifer, she sed she waz 18!
yes I need sum 2z
Sorry t_k, I didn’t see you down here.
*Rims glass with powdered sugar*
Lesse, some Katlua and some Whiskey…
And then fill with coffee…
A big plop of Devonshire Cream on top…
And some Suchard shavings…
Enjoy!
Ohai Maus again.
Cud yoo pleez drop down a bit an giv AllyBally hur drink?? Ai dint kwite bring hur up far enuf. She’s just above where ai shout fur Kermette and Klolz.
in onner ob teh braid…………..
http://www.mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=2230638
*crosses paws dat dis will post*
OMG taht iz teh funnee!
@@@@@!
I’m in – Irish Coffee for me, no sugar pls.
I like mai sugar in donuts …
.
.
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when i can has mai nekst hart attack, can this kitteh CPR meh?
But what if yu splort n taht creeating medkul compli… comp… messes yu up moar?
i will have to keep mai CHRG on permanently, i suppose …
Need Medic-Alert tag: Du NAWT remooving tihs CHRG!
Ai wanna medik alert badge dat sez “In teh ebent uv aksident do nawt allow ennee polly tishuns to bisit me in teh horse piddle, kthxbai”
Tehre shud be LAW gainst taht. Shud be awn list uv fings taht being bad fur reecobery.
???? Ai wud think. (ROFL) that fur yoo, as a costyoom desainer (LOL) . . .well – it mite hav sum adverse effex upawn yur career.
.
Oar – maybbe nawt! Yoo cud say yoo were desainging teh costyoom fur ICHE!! Teh Mewsikul!
ICHE? I Can Haz Ebryfing?
LOL!! Werks fur mee!!
Lesse, what else? Hmmmm….
Petit Fours, Beignets, some cataloupe with Serrano ham…
Some Leche Frita, maybe, and some Mixta.
I think I’m channeling some of the breakfasts I had in Spain…
I can has kwah-sonh plz?
churros!!
NOM!
cafe con leche, sin azucar, por favor!
Dont stop nao!!! sounds reelee gud!
OK. Blood Oranges. Rustic bread with fresh honey. Freshly pressed raspberry juice…
*feels faint . . .sits down*
Blood Oranges???? Oh, HAO ai miss gud Blood Oranges.
I haz freshly-baked scones wif devon cream, tangerine honey, and mixed forest berry jam for on tops…. Fank yu for teh cawfeee, JCH4K. Teh tea just wuzzn’t wayking me tis am.
Wun ov my menny jawbs wz in a specialty bakery, and I bekayme teh champeen skone baker. *brag mode on* I haz teh light tuch so they r NAWT oberbakeded hockey pucks, but delek-table, butter-layered carriers for teh devon cream. * brag mode off*
Can Ai join teh partee? Ai lubs teh scones…nomnomnom….
An maib, cuz eets onli nawt eben 8 am heer, a screw dribber fir drinkses.
Ai needs mai bite a man C!
ohai! ai ebentualee found da partee! silleh tacksi dropped meh awf at da wrong howse!
Here’s the Bailey’s on the rocks I poured you…
Or you can have some Irish Coffee…
Or a Kir Royale…
Or some whiskey…
Whatever you want!
ohai, Maus!
ai can haz awl?
mibbe ai fallz ova, but ai do it happee!
All in one glass?
y nawt? sayvz onda washin up! iz awl goin da saym wayz anywayz!
one barmat shooter, comin’ up!!
ohai! diz bee where da parteez at? ai can joyn? airish cawfee wud bee vereh welcum… ai iz all alone at work an iz pleh. sconz sound vereh nomibl!
hepps yrseff. Plenny fr ebberybody!
An they ar lite az a fether!! Nawt hahkey pux!! LOL!! Sumdai, booklion, ai am coming to visit yoo – an maybee yoo can show mee hao to doo taht.
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Ai maed sum Semmelknoedel wunz – tehy were veree tasytee – but SOOO hebbee it uz a liak yoo had , , ,sumthing reelee hevee . . .in yur stomach.
*pokes hed hopfullee arown corner*
doo i smellz a scone?
Ifinkso! An sum other gud stuff too! Help yerself!
Fresh outta teh oben, a noo speshul batch just fr teh donkey!
Gud tu c y, Donkey!!1!! Ai’ve mist yr bigee eers an purdy hoofees!
Noms toasts wif razberi jams n nilla tee, n luks at awl teh zotik fuds.
nilla tee! iz whut ai iz drinkin IRL! Twinings?
did sumone sai IRISH???
i lyke teh whiskeys!!!
Yay!!11! And hold teh cawfee! *hic*
Help yourself! Plenty for everyone!
Yay! yuo wif me den upfi?? hay dun feel sew bad…iz 5 oclork sumwherez!!!
cos ai is wif u! Iz 5 o’clock here – in wun hour. *hic* Or sow. Singlol malt, pweeze, Mr Maus, while u r at it. *squints and holds out glass wif shaky feelers*
OK. Glenmorangie “Quinta Ruban”, or do you have a favorite?
Dat’ll do nicely, fank u. I likes teh Glengoyne, but is not eezy to get by ware ai libz.
*Pours upfi 3 fingers*
Sláinte!
o hai! i can has a skot un bourbons????
OK! Old Grand Dad 114? Or something else?
heehee jus tryin to sound sophf.. soff..jus tryin to sound fancee! iz doin it rong den? Okz i has a vodka on teh rockiez wiffa tweest? kthx
Ice…
*ClinkClinkClinkClinkClink*
Grey Goose OK?
*GlugGlugGlugGlugGlug*
And a fresh lemon twist!
Enjoy!
Fank u, Mr Maus.
*gingerly remoobez teh 3 fingurs frum her glass and sips teh Glenmorangie daintily*
Luk!! Ar deer AllyBally iz heer, too!! She wuz down below, so ai browt hur up heer. She needs sumthing, too!! (An she’s frum Scotland, too!!)
AllyBally
October 10th, 2008 at 4:12 am
ai iz reddy 2 partee! ai can haz airysh creem? wiv icee cubes? iz nawt 5o’clock heer, but ai can preetend…
Well aie goes awt tew get teh shuppin an wen i kums bak there iz a parti in full swing!!!!!! Wow a fridegg afernoon parti redi for caturday cawnt me IN.
*pixs up floote ob cham pain, sip, sip* ooo dis be reet gud champ ane *spiez buuffeet and starts to graze* nom nom nom thnx u ebrebody nom nom nom.
*clinkees glass wif Maggsuvrhoomun*
Maggsuverhoomun, I reelly lyked teh story yu tolded about writers blox on the ovver fred.
aww fankq booklion
*clinkee glasses* Cheerz!! Dis be a lubberlee parti
Well, hai there, lolwannabeee!! An welcom to teh partee.
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Ar yoo frum Ireland??? If so, cweenmj wud get verree egg sighted! Az yet, we hav NO WUN frum Ireland awn teh CheezPeeplMap.
.
Skewz me. *shouts* KERMETTE (IRL)!!! KLOLZ!! Are yoo out there????? We need yoo fur teh map!!
I killed him U is safe
Yes, doan wurri ma’am, dis oringey guy, he wontz bodder yous any mores.
ur doin it rong
skwishy kitteh iz…skwished
Cat Powncing Rrrrrr!
ai tink ur doin it wrong..
Yiss, teh “payshunt” iz downsied up!
Oh, an GMTA!
Fur teh stock market. . .
it bee needin maor dan CPR ifinkso
Stock market needs kiss of life, aifinkso … mabbeh dis is moar massadj like?
Sry. Beyond hope. Let it die…
Sumwun haz put Finland up fur sail! Ohai bid so far – $17,000,000.
Haw menee fins do we get wif this order?
Kin we maek loan shark’s fin soop?
Aie heer Atlantis is nekt…. well letz face it, dere ekonomi cant gets anyi lower…
*giglol*
ai heer itz sinkin fast!
Haz sunk wivowt trayse
… and den it started digging.
TitanEEKonomee???
20 fousand leagues unner teh see.
Send Cap’n Nemo to teh reskew!
can yu find him?
WIN Janet!
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
I fink yu meenz Iceland…I kan haz ice in my dwink, pleez?
Dunno!!!1! Izn’t teh currant sea ice cubes in Iceland?
Dat wud gib teh markets sum mush needed liquiditee!
@@@@Upfi!
Yesh!! Upfi reelee haz teh funnee this moarning!
and a hole new meaning to global warming!
Ahhh, fanks u peeps, u makez me feel awl red in teh fayce.
Ai is making an effurt cos it is Fryday and tomorrow is CATURDAY!!
*heddesk*
dis izn’t zacktly whut ai meaned wen ai aksed yu tew wawlk awn mai bak.
Kitteh walk all ober u n jest dawnt kare!
Y him no wantz tu pley wif meh?
“He’s dead, Jim…”
FTW!
Ai plai wif u, kitteh!
Dat sowndz liek gued ideeya, Karen. Kitteh kud yooz sum reel frenz.
A Happy Ending ths massage haz one
Oh, nao THERE’S a happee thot!!
thees r nawt teh splorts yr looking for
Dis teh las tiem u toy wid mai affekshunz u orinj cad!!
Maggsuverhoomun – FTW!!!! “toy wid mai affekshuncz” *snerk*
iz dis Dr. Tinycat?
Maibee Dr. Tinycat haz a minion??? (Himz awflee kyoot tew habz minionz, butt maibee???)
maybe he’s Resident-almost-Dr Tinycat? oar premed Tinycat, doing his hoamwerks…
Cud b sekund kareer doktur, sinz tihs kitteh iz muchlee bigger tahn Dr. TC.
Kitteh iz nawt a doktor, him jus plaiz wun awn ICHC
FTW!! @@@@@
Bak massaj, yer doin it rite.
a lykly stori
shee-hat-zoo massadj… ai iz doin it!
Dat’s wot ai fought, AllyBally, but dint noes hao to spell dat in lolspeak and waz too lazee to luk in dikshunary.
Hai AllyBally!! Ar yoo coming up to teh brekfast partee?
ai iz reddy 2 partee! ai can haz airysh creem? wiv icee cubes? iz nawt 5o’clock heer, but ai can preetend…
Az Sj (martoonie) awlwaiz says – SUMWHERE itz 5 o’clock!
.
But come up – literally – to where Maus is pouring the sham pain an booklion haz just browt sum scones.
Ai’ll take yur message up via copy ‘n payste – if yoo dont’ mind.
.
an did yoo see?? Paws4Thot wuz heer too – awn another pikchoor, to be sure. So AWL of SKAWLAND wuz heer at the same taim. Wow!!
hay, you guise. is not a paté until i gets here. didja saev sum fur me
There’s plenty! Scroll up towards the top!
Bailey’s on the rocks, coming up!
*GlugGlugGlugGlugGlug*
Enjoy!
Teh Sun iz obur teh yardarm, wahtebur a yardarm iz!!
iz wen the liddle hand on the clock point tew a number
Ai fout it wuz sumfing tu du wif ships?
Nawt teh wuuly kynd, teh kind pyrates yused.
pyrates yused ships? sumbudee fone da animlol rites peeplez!
Teh sheeps in teh feeld? tey r sumtiems wuully n sumtiems nawt. aie nawt noe pyrates be fond ob sheep
unless they r Welsh pyrates maibei…..
*snerk*
Hey! Aiz Welsh! Ar yu despara…disaparig…makin snyde comints bout teh Welsh an sum…hum…unnatureal…attatachement tu sheeps?
.
Ai does lik teh sheeps, tho…..
Oh noes teasel, aie seen all dem sheeps onna welsh mawntains, inna feelds n inna boochers chop so aie be finking uz must be fawns ob dem
Deer dew bee lotsa sheeps der!
Awn mii nawt sekkund trip der, Ai sawed awl des sheeps inna field an asked sumwun y awl teh sheeps had purdy reinbow cullers awn der back rearendee parts….
Teh oldie gennelmens thot Ai waz stoopee, but tol mii, in tu much detayl, dat iz hao dey noes wot boi haz beed wif wot gurl!
Taht be clebber way tu du it, akshully… *fyles taht away mentlee fru mebee use in stowree sumtyme*
I has a fren frum Irelund who says dat the reason Scotsmen wares kilts is dat sheeps can hear zippers.
Well, ew! But
Pwactice maiks purrfect
Yu noes hoa peeples sumtiemz gits awl senttimenttal wen day bees drinkin?
An deres lottsa dat goins awn tudai. Weel, Ai jus wnna tell yu awls dat Ai haz bean kinna panic-ee latelee an comin heer tu c wot teh cheesfrens bez dunin haz keeped mii sane (as aim eber gonna git, aniwais!). Noa Ai gotz ickee stuffs dun (tacksus, fur wun) Ai kan plais moar wif mai cheesfrens! Yah!
Yay, teasel!!! {{{{{teasel)))))
O, an fank yu awl fir awl yr funniness an warminess!
Taht be full uv teh win n awsum n ebryfing!
N ai gree, tihs being wunnerful way tu dealing wif panikee n ank-shus fings.
{{{teasel}}}
troo dat! laffing releases teh Ndorfings n sara-tonins n gud neurotransmittens…
awwww {{{{{teasel}}}}}
say, is dat u ina pikture up there? aie sees sum resemblenze
Yesh—Aiz teh oranj borked wun…
Iz otay, we just neading yu bak intu shaep. (Nawt sheep! No sheep at awl!)
wot u got against sheep aniwayz
nawt sayin nuffin! *snerk*
Bah!
Fanks fir yr hugz! {{{{{{{{{{hugs bak}}}}}}}}}}
.
Ai noes, awn tu teh nex pikshur!!! Ai nebber am payin atenshun tu teh tiem!
Luks moar lyke Sweetish Massaj tu mii.
Yu ar SO busteded.
A-DOOR-ABLE
kitteh dooz biskits
OH HAI, MAH KITTEH DOEZ TEH SAME TING, BUT NOT 4 CPR. HEZ LUST FILLD KITTEH DAT HAS RAPD ALL OV MAH DAUGHTERS TEDDY BEARS AN BARBIEZ, HE RUBS HIS MARBLEZ AGAINST THEM AN PLAYS ALL SEKSY.
OMG i srsly had dat kitteh toy when i wuz a littl hooman
Kitteh nawt? Kittehs always being ebil, aifinkso. Tehy just so cyoot tehy get away wif anyfing.