Thank you…
Thank you… Captain Obvious.
captin obvious iz nivver halpful.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption:
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Cheezburger Network Blog
Ai noe Ai iz a cat
yoo beet meh tew it! congradumatashuns awn gettin teh furst poast.
oopsies…it haz bin brot tew mai tenshun dat ai ment “nawt sekkund.” sowwy.
gud wurk, and she is fast as a bandit….iddn’t she?
Ohai SHD! Ifn U doan mynd, I gunna borry ur ohai spawt 4 uh liddul bit…
…
FIGGER SK8N CHEEZMEET NOOZ
4 awl da CheezFrinz n da Hotlanta ayreeuh hoo b innerstid n da figger-sk8n CheezMeet awn Layboring Dai weak-ind, I poastid sum noo infoe awn da CheezFrenz Yahoo groop. Plz 2 b poastin ur sugjeschunz awn wat 2 dew n win 2 dew it sew we kin nayl daown uh skedyool. I b hoapin 2 C summa U CheezFrinz dere IRL!
…
We naow ritern U 2 ur regyoolerlee skedyoolded LOL
Badges! We don’t need no stinkin’ badges!
Yoo guise R sum fast! Concats!
Ifinkso wii needs sum rum punch… n ai donut noe wut dans – praps teh Saylers Hormpype?
Mebbe sum grog to go wif teh rum. Most of teh saylor fud is PLEH, tho — stale biskit and salt beef. Nor rly gud unless fresh.
annipuss musta bin traynin wid der british lolympic sailors
Yer welcum!
Actually, I should be referred to as “Ebil Supreme 5-Star High Commander General of the Universe Obvious”.
canz wi call you Ebil for short?
Yas, ESFSHCGUO.
dat surely is a mowfull maebe weze dawnt call hims at all aifnkso
LOL!
I fink teh EM has teh Napoleeonic complex.
U noes, the smaller they iz, the bigger they
talksdreems…U R, aftur awl, teh veree modul ov a modren majur jenerul! Obvee-ussly!
♫♫♫
I’m very good at integral and differential calculus;
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
♫♫♫
could you do that one more time……really fast?
*Takes a REALLY deep breath*
*Nods to the conductor*
♫♫♫
For my military knowledge, though I’m plucky and adventury,
Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century;
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General!
♫♫♫
Yay! Hooray! Claps floofy paws! tries to whistle- not so well-claps moar!!
Mayjer-Jenrul?? Moar liek Sarjint-Mayjer
…
“Naow, 2dai, we gunna dew marchin up n daown da skwayr! Dat iz, unless enny uv U gotz ennyfing beddur 2 dew. Well?! Ennywun gotz ennyfing dey’d ravvur b dewin dan marchin up n daown da skwayr?!
too bee kwite onnest, Sarge, ai’d ravver bee at hoam wif DH an mah kittehs and goggies…!
Awrite. Awf wif U den.
Did u just auf tessm?
no, no, ai iz fyne. iz MP ref —
.
http://www.mwscomp.com/movies/mol/m-06-iii.htm
ohai, leeza-b! ai iz fyne, thx.
izza monty python ref frum meening uv liff.
.
duz yoo haz a buk yoo’d lyke too reed?
Oops. I only knows teh Grail by hart.
Cept for teh closing song! *whistles*
r u collecktin buk rekkomendations?
still rong. Dat wuz Life uv Brian I was thinkin uv.
itz ok, ai hadda luk it up wiv taht linkee to get teh dial… dyuh… wurds rite.
.
wun uv teh nexts guyz sez, “ai hazza buk ai’d lyke too reed”, an hee getsz sent awf too.
Ohai tessm. I sended yew an e-mayo so ai hoeps yew getted it.
Ai has losted teh will to twerk.
ur services no longer rewkired tho.
brandin is so 1980’s!
Ai reefyooz 2 ware cloes wiv adberts awn – Ai fink dey shud pai me 2 ware dem, nawt maek me pai to adbertiez dem.
Ai agrii, Annipuss!
ya!
Where’s the Owl?
ohai DK!
Um, wut?
Yoo noe – teh Owl n teh Pussykitteh!
hooooooo?
OOOOOHHHH!
*lite dawns*
Okays, guess I shudda stuck to piratey wench owtfit after all.
*Strips off teh leederhosen and re-wenches*
Donut hurting urselb.
Dan or Ebil will rub out de kinkz if she ..uh, wenches sumfing…
yarr!
.
*shivers timbers*
yo ho ho!
nah, nawt that high ranked,……only single ho
I’m shur u can werk ur way up…
But ‘yo ho’ for now!
U should save that oufit for September 19, which as everybuddy knoes is Talk Like A Pirate Day.
http://www.talklikeapirate.com/
“Let your inner pirate help you… find a mate” – LOL!
Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr !
I has to has some piratey fun now, becaws I will be at teh beech on the 19th and will miss teh offishul sellabrashun.
Is u feline better todai LCB?
And how is teh Esme doin?
I is still feeling pleh.
Esme was a imp last nite. She kept trying to nom the little tiny ribbon bow on teh shirt I was waring. She hasn’t done stuff like that for a while. Also this morning when she came into teh baffroom for teh daily staff meeting she announced herself wif a loud “MYOW!” Usually she just comes in all quiet like. So mabye she is feeling better. Betterer than me today, seemingly.
shez prolly just tryin to cheer u up!
cheer u up… wake u up… one of dose….
makes um wak der plank!
stoopi hoomanz kant evens spell kaptain rite
kitteh iz sew OVR haffin tew wear hat..
btu dat fing awn mai hed iz a hat, nawt a cat. AI iz teh cat. (imajin a lil powtin faec heer.)
Ohai Tipsy, juss a discreet noet. FangQ fur teh congrats, but it is considered moar purrlite heer nawt to yooz teh “F” wurd. It iz bedder 2 sai “Nawt sekond” oar “furthest frum last”
o rite…sowwy.
ai’z gunna lern dis kina stuff evenshullly, btu til then ai’z gunna maek lotsa stoopid miztaeks.
baer wif mee, plz? (imajin kyoot kitteh faec heer.)
U aern’t stoopie – noe wun ekspeks u 2 noe ebbryfing – dats wye Ai telled u. Dis iz a nies plaes an we halps noobies. Teh ownlee strikt rool iz “Plae nies” an u do dat, so u aer berry walcum!
sank yoo…ai kina feelz liek ai has teh dumb 2dai. nawt enuff sleepiez, tew menny nitemaers frum wachin peeps plaein Contagion las nite. duz we haz a lil yawny faec?
Oh hai Tipsy. Ai noetissed dat yoo liek to make faces (in a gud way). In case yoo hab nawt seen this, here iz u linkee to the faces that WordPress lets you make.
faq.wordpress.com/2006/06/04/what-smilies-can-i-use/
ai haz bin giben dat linkee, btu fur sum reezin mai werk puter wunt owpin it…sez it kant fynd teh survr. soes furr nao teh lackaj ov lil faeces iz skrooin wif mai powrz ov aspreshun.
Try dis….
nativeca66latex.wordpress.com/2008/08/09/hello-world/#comment-332
Be shur to put aych tee tee pea colun slash slash in frunt ob it.
oooh, dats wut teh probblim wuz. ai furgotted teh http:// pawt. silleh mee.
fank yoo!
it jus eeted mai powst! wut ai treid tew zay wuz: fank yoo, an ai fink it wunt werkin befoar cuz ai furgotted teh aych tee tee pea colun slash slash, silleh mee.
welcome too teh world ov wierdpress. it alwayz eets posts
mai otter fourem alsoe eets powsts. dunno wai ai thot ai cud exacyp it heer. silleh mee agenz, ai gess. (imajin a lil powty faec heer, kant fynd wun awn wurdpress.)
S’okay! We haz awl dun so- other peeps try to gently sho us de way of ICHC.
AI is teh cat in teh hat!! Appollow gees to Dr Suuusss!
Ohai ManfredMom – gud to see yu! We donut see enuff ob yu wn heer tehse dais!
HI Ambercat! Ai lurks a lot – buts dere b soo menee nu LoLfrenz commintin dats ai don hab tymes to sort fru dem awl ro eeben sum ob dems! So yule see meh wens aim lukkee nuffs to commints eerlee!
Beydes – mai lyfes bin berree x syting! Gots borked discs in nek n hab serjeree in 2 weekz n mai car waz stole yesterdai! AARRGHHH!!!
…..”and did u mayke yerself one dat sez’DUH’…….”
Kitteh needs teh “I’m wif stoopy” T-shurt to cumpleet teh ensom…onsemb…outfit.
Win!
Gess wat ai jest helded: A 4 dai old bebbeh kitteh!
WANT WANT WANT!!!!!
Put the bebbeh kitteh down and SLOWLY back away……..
But eek, him wuz orinj an hiz eies wuzznt opin yet, an him wuz doin the bebbeh kitteh skweek-meow.
Ai fink him boi, nawt shure. 2 yung 2 tayle and ai din’t luk.
Babbeh iz 2 yung 2 leeb himz mummacat.
Himz mahm crossed teh bridj.
Nooo! Dat R too sad!! Who bee taking caer ob him n hims chudders?
Teh hoomin hoo wuz owned bai his mahm iz takin care ov him an his brudder. Awl teh udder siblings r ‘dopted owt.
Teh hoomin is syrinj-feedin teh bebbehs. Wun mite nawt maek it.
{{{{bebbeh kittehs wif no mamakitteh}}}}
Mai sister wuz fostering a mammakitteh n her sik bebbehs wunce. Ai kittehsat teh liddlest one (Pipsqueak) overnite. Hims went to sleep on mai chest, den ai putted him to bed inna big pot wif a litebulb unner it to keeping hims warm. In teh nite he tried to clim owt, so ai putted a buk awn top, leeving a gap for air. But in teh morning hims had crost teh bridj… Ai cryd n cryd. Aifinkso ai killded hims. But sum ob hims sibs crost teh bridj too.
Dat iz sad, {{{{{4p5k}}}}} but Ai knoes iz nawt yer faultz. Sumtiems teh teenie tinie kittehs jus doan maek it. Ai guessing y00 wuz yung, aslo.
Fanks, poohbear. Ai didded mai bestest fur him, n helded him n lubbed him.
*solemnly*
Yus, dat iz awl we kan d0 an teh kittehs knoa wen we lubs tehm. Mebbe tihs wun tiem it didn werk but Ai bet lotsa ovver tiems y00 haz had teh win!
oh, dats teh sad!!
{{{{{{{{{DK}}}}}}}}}}
Donot has a sad, u tried to halp!
Heer… wud u like to put a costoom on 2?
We has a hole pile heer.
*shows pyle to DK*
Fanks leeza. Ai guess vet tech wud nawt being a gud chois fur mi…
*britens* Ai noe – got ennee LCB costooms in dat pyle?
I fink dere is wutever u want in there!
U cud be a LCB… and teh handkuff will go wif that owtfit 2!
Eff it waz ur fawlt he died – and prollee waznt -
“Good judgment comes with experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.”
Peeps maek mistakes, and if you spend a lot of time with ammals, from time to tiem u maek a mistake wid dem. U did wad u cud, wid wat u knu atda tiem.
Dat wur fur 4.5kittehs
oh noes!
po lil bebbeh kittehs, beesin orfinded at dat aeg. (imajin a lil cryin faec heer agenz.)
Hoepin fur teh bests {{{{{teenie kittehs}}}}}
Ai has such a beeg sad 4 teh bebbeh. Ai kno hao him feelz, bein alone inna whirled.
Ai felt such a conneckshun 2 him. Mebbe CC will chanj mai parintz mind(z).
i had to do da saem wiff dese kittehs, syrinj feed dem http://www.video.yahoo.com/mypage?s=4788175&public=1
da When Cats Attack!!1! one video… but dey… well, dey did maek it so far but den got sick and crossed da bridge….
Oh, rhsb — datz sad
{{{{{bebbeh kittehz}}}}}
Mayded me preesheeayt da wunz dat wuz steel rownd awl da moar…
I fosterded bebbeh kittehz 4 mai kitteh’z vet 4 uh wyl. Winted throo sevrul litturz. Wun littur uv 6 bebbehz dint dew sew grate — 2 uvvem krawst da brij n wun nite.
CCC comes to res q – heer b awl teh sppel eyes u need to aboyd splorting n uninteshunil adopshun ob bebbeh kitteh!
Hay, look! Teh kitteh’s in teh noospaper. Well, at least there’s noospaper coverage of teh kitteh.
Film at elebenty.
*headesk*
Hey LCB! Did you feels funnee head-plonks on last Fryday nite? We wuz driving past DC onna beltway, and I frowed sum shynee fings at yoo.
That was U? Oh, thx for thinking of me.
And BTW, crumpled-up fast food wrappers do not count as “shiny things.” kthxplzdonotlitter
LCB- did U gib Hashim hims watch back? Ai no U wuz just lukkin at it in de lite, but he may needs it fur skool!
???
(wuz on prebious thred)
Well, there u go. I wasn’t on teh previous thred. Must’ve beed a impostifier.
d-den…where be mah watch??
i haz a sad…
*goez and sits under da bed wiff himz fellow dust bunneyz*
ever heard of a minion?
yesh…. but who be da minion??
o wait…
Ohai LCB!!
it waz nuffin…
jus dis http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/2008/08/20/funny-pictures-dog-startid-it/#comment-418635
Did u check rhsb? She was saying last nite she had some urges to see shiny things in teh lite.
nope… will check on her too… doez u hab any minionz LCB??
Mabye. Who wants to know? U? We might be hiring soon. Here, take a application and fill it out in fourplicate.
hmm…i’ll keep it and fill it out later… fanks anyway!
I don’t recall steeling his watch.
*rolls up sleeve to reveal elebenty watches*
Is it one of these?
shiney…*closes eyes*
**murmers** must…nawt…steel….shiny…
Be carefuls: I haven’t de-activated teh asploding dye packets in any of those yet.
ohh…
eh…only partial coverage.
It was more of a editorilol.
But just wait until teh kitteh shows u his rebuttal.
Mai kittehs luvs to show me sum rebuttal- “talk to de tayle” ai think dey is sayin’
Heh. Here’s some other things they might be saying:
http://www.littlefivers.com/pets/reasons-your-cat-constantly-sticks-its-butt-in-your-face/
ROFLMHO!!!!!
fang u berry mush fur dat linkee!!!!
Ur welcom. This is teh hyoomer list I publishes every week. I set a topic, send it to my kennel of contributors, they send back up to 3 funny items for that topic, I pick (and edit when necessary) teh bestest of them and viola!
Anyone here who wants to rite for my list is welcome. U all pretty much has teh funny, as any one of our alphamabetical lists here and most of teh commints prove. Write to me at lolcatburglar at teh gmail dot com for moar informations.
AI taut dat berry edificashunal an infurmatiff
Very good captioning, made me LOL at work. Luckily, my co-workers are used to this.
Ebbreewun shud lol at werk. I lol @ werk ebbrree day. I b retired!
Kitteh sez: Cat? Wut cat? Wen did wii get a cat? Ai din’t authorize dis!
Bartee wud hab dis auf an acruss deh rum in 1/2 secund an dee udder une wud maek shur ai cudnt reech his hed. (He’s berry long an puts his reer tords me.)
Oh hai Jajeh!! I roted to u last nite
http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/2008/08/19/funny-pictures-sleepeh-committeh/
August 19th, 2008 at 8:21 pm
It b deh story uv deh nite watchman u askinged 4 a cuppla weekz ago. I haz 2 warning u, it b a sad storee.
Ohai, cweenmj. I saw yor storeh. I saw liddel storehs uv teh nite watchman uv ICHC a few tymes but I had no idear he wuz sumwun beluvved by yoo. {{cweenmj}} I left yoo a liddel note ther, but heerz wun too. Fanks teh watchman fur lukkin owt fur teh kittehs. I did nawt no abowt yor sad an I feels teh sad fur yoo.
Thank you for the story. Your son looks so intelligent, sensitive and wonderful. I’m sorry you lost him. It must be devastating. Depression can be terrible; you feel as if you are in the bottom of a black well and can’t climb out of it. Know that Eric rests in the arms of G-d, Who loves him and once seemed so far away.
Eric resembles my younger brother.
Didn’t know the night watchman at the bridge was so gorgeous! I’m sure he’s taking great care of the kitties that come there.
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{cweenmj}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Eric}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Captain Obvious of teh kitteh piratz want’z his grog naow!
Did someone call?
http://www.ammahls.com/random/captainobvious03.jpg
tess tess wun two wun two
Summtymes Hewminz needz
halp deesydeeng wut feengz awrr.
Sillee hatz awrr ‘Pleh!’
Hewmin langwijj iz
cawnfewzeeng wenz Kitteh speekz
oanlee ‘Feelin~eez’
Vokabyoolarree iz nawt
Kitteh’z strawngz poynt. Awllso tawlkz
wiff bawdee langwijj
Jack.
Iz nawt nyse too laybel peepul!! oar kittehs!!
hiya peeple! Mez bak
sew howdowee tok in teh commints? Ahve saw tat sum of teh cheezpeeps hav lon commints… is tat a poem or wez uppost to tak lik dat?
u can talk az u liek… jus’ one rule, play nice, datz all!! u can post poemz, normal commintz, chat etc…
okay doke
Awfully auspicious articles
Bally brilliant booklets
Ceverly constructed comments
D…
Daily humorous commints
Elebenty thousand wurdz describing ur kitteh
Friendly posts
G….
grin-full greetingz
happitaylz helpful hintz
inkredibullee intelligint infoarmashun
j…
Just wut pops in yer hed
Kitteh greetings ::hedbonk::
Latex messages
Mewzings
N
Nauty barn nooz
one line or tu or tree, or more
Purrpull proze
Quintessentially sumtim or udder
R
Really interesting stuff
Stuff that you like
Things about neat stuff
U…
Unuzual stuff
very unuzuual stuv
weellee unuzual stuff
xtra unuzual stuff
zealously written stuff
yoo clicky teh bloo “reply to this comment” dats in teh bottim rite kornur ov teh kommint. (did dat maek sense? ai haz lotsa sleepy-derpryvded an ai dun fink mai brane iz werkin rite.)
hmm… u want sum coffee fur ur brayn??
**hands Tipsy a mug of coffee**
fank yoo…ai drankded lotsa coffee dis mowrnin btu ai fink it wored awf. iz awlmoast 2pm heer.
ohhh…so its lunch tiem fur u?
afta lunch tym fur mee. ai awreddy aet mai leftowvr chili. dere wuznt enuff ov it, btu it wuz yummeh.
ai gitz tew goe howm in 2 howrs adn taek a lil nap. yaaaay!
um…plz inorr teh parinfetckul part ov mai last powst. it wuz in refrinss tew sumfin ai deleetid befoar postin. see wut ai maens bowt dat ai knat brane 2dai?
Nau ai triyin tu find waddai spozzed to ignoar.
teh “did dat maek sense” pawt. teh fing dat ai dint fink maed sense wuz duleetid befoar postin.
“wat ever it iz, itz better dan a dunce cap *sigh*”
ohai, poohbear
How u d0ing, 00bark?! Ai bin bery, bery busy wiv Mimi kitteh gettin “fixed”, farder-in-law in teh hostipal an gettin flat (apartimen) decormorated for sunkitteh ~ him startingz n00 job next Toosday, in Lundun. Noe times fur maiself at awl!
.
Jus geddin bak t0 normal r00tine today…
ur faddder-in-law in hoppital getting fixed?
Ohh, guezz ai red ur pozt tuu fazt….
Corn, grits, shoelaces to sunkitteh! Mimi kitteh…getting fixed? Iz her borked?
Az foar meh, ai’m pleh.
Nuffink tew sea heer, fokes. Mooooooove a lawng.
he cans make a hat, a brooch, a pterodactyl…
Iz dat da wether ripoart?
There’s a sale at Penney’s!
“Da fogz gittin thikerer”
“N Leon’z gittin laaarrrjerer!”
You’d better tell the Captain we’ve got to land as soon as we can.
This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.
A hospital?
What is it?
It’s a big building with patients, but that’s not important right now.
Oops – Wrong characters – Let’s try this…
“Auntie Em, Uncle Henry, Toto! It’s a twister! It’s a twister! “
“O, itza big priddee wite playn wif red strypz, kerrtinz n da winderz n weelz n it lukz liek uh big Tylenol.”
“Why, datz teh Rushun New Year. Wii kin hab uh parade and surv hawt oar durves”
“The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in a red zone.”
“The red zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in a white zone,”
“No, the white zone is for loading. Now, there is no stopping in a RED zone.”
“The red zone has always been for loading.”
“Don’t you tell me which zone is for loading, and which zone is for unloading.”
“Look Betty, don’t start up with your white zone litter logs again. There’s just no stopping in a white zone.”
“Oh really, Vernon? Why pretend, we both know perfectly well what this is about. You want me to have an abortion.”
“It’s really the only sensible thing to do, if its done safely. Therapeutically there’s no danger involved. we’re talking ’bout horking up hayrballz, right.”
Surely, U gais r nawt seryouslee mawking teh Airplane! LOL!
Noe, we b mawking it funnilee!!
N donut call hims surely!
4 crieyin owt laowd — I misted dat oppertoonittee!
Missd opportunidee costas u a point dedukshun in the lolympics!
Airplane ref – FTW
i iz kitteh get wif tey floofy pawz kyoot lil nose big eyes and tey hat wif *cat* on it
k, ebryone, iz going to sleep!!
see ya’ll tomorrow!! *CRACK!!*
*falls hard on da floor dat it cracked… a bit*
*zzzZZZzzzZZzzZzz*
*getz in ICHC tyme mosheen; flies bak thru tyme a few minnuts; puts a sawft pillow under Hashim’s hed befoar it hitz teh grownd; kwiklee flies bak to teh present*
Nightie-night, sweet dreems {{{{{Hashim & Simba}}}}}
hmmm maiB the obvioyus label iz fer the DOG
sew he will know whut tew chase???
haha funny stuff
thats so funny
oooh-kay, heerz teh burfday fairy, runnin late today. hadda doktor checkup (pleh), vizit frum mudder-in-law (nise ladee, but half teh time i don kno wut shes talkin abowt) an talkin on fon to boi away at kollij whoz got teh tummy-jurms an iz frowin up.
but now i will set all taht aside to wish a big HAPPEE BURFDAY to all teh cheezfrenz, lolfrenz, lurkurfrenz, an trolfrenz hoo haz tehms burfdays today!! 
!!1!! heerz hommaed caeks (howd i haz time to maek tehm? i’z teh burfday fairy – its majik!! ), party hats, an goody bags wif kandeez, bowncy ballz, liddle puzzles wif teh beeds taht yoo roll arownd to get into teh hole, an shinysparkly pensils!! and konfettiz!
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One year, my sisters and I dressed my cat up for Halloween with a sweater that said “Dog” on it. I don’t think she was amused. Or that anyone was fooled.
Shouldn’t it be Catpain Obvious?
LOLLOLOLOL. dis is 1 of my VERY favoritez.
NOOO ITS A IGUANA!!!