IZE SORRY I ENDANJURED U
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Cheezburger Network Blog
Awww… SPLOOORRRRTTTTT
oh noes!! DK is down!
**Runs to find teh CCC**
Okays…
*Reeds manual*
1. Sweep up braynes
2. Put bak in hed
3. Put on CHRG and ducky taype on tite
4. Give sawfty blanket and hot chawklit or martoonie, wif extra choklit possums or other niftee shapes.
*does all of teh above*
NOW… for DK, I fink we shud adds something speshul.
Maybe a nice massage??
Get Well Soon!
*Looks at leeza’s comment*
Oh… You said massage… Sry…
Lessee..a, e, i, o, u….. y wudn’t cownt heer…..
I has a huh?
Nice “message” ai fink – hence “Get Well Soon!”
MESSAGE! It wuz a Get Well message! And obviously an extremely lame pun…
ok, ok, I gets it now!
I wuz thinking u were givin DK get well wishes frum my CCC attempt…
Hai leeza-b! Just hitching a ryde heer if ai may.
MAY AI PLEEZ HAV YUR ATTENSHUN?
Tomorrow, teh 16th ov July – teh munth ov teh grate Julius Caesal
iz teh burfday ov teh wun an awnlee ROMEOW, teh Koolest Kitteh ov tehm awl!
It will bee heer – awn teh fourth pikchure – 9 AM ICHC tiem.
Ebreewun iz invited! Caek an refreshing beverajes ov awl kinds will bee serbed.
An feel free to bring ene presents yoo want!
pssst….Janet….ai lefted u a msg awn teh angry bag pickshur…
werl ackshully lots ob us left u a msg. Nawt just me.
werl ackshully lots ob us left u a msg. Nawt just me.
hmm, how did dat do dat twice????? Ai can has cloning?
Thank yoo deer martoonie. Ai hav seen them. An ai am so grateful to hav yoo an the odders az frenz. It meens teh whirled to mee. Speshullee nao.
{{{Janet}}}
Oh ROMEOW – nermally ai wud show up late to ur burfday partee wehn eberybody else had moved awn an make teh commint dat nobuddy wud see – but on this occayshun ai knows ai will nawt be heer tomorrow (ai is doing mai favrit fing – drinkin teh drinkies dat sumbuddy else is payin for!!!) so ai is showin up URLY. Ai has a small but perfickly formed premachewr sellybrayshun for u. Heer is ur caek, heer is ur martoonie, an heer is ur partee hat an streemers. HAPPY BIRFDAY!!!!
OK now eberybuddy else plz wait for teh offishul partee or ai will be in trubble.
SJ
*whspers so as not to call attention*
Fank yew, SJ.
Doan tell ennywon dat I’m eating caek, drinking a martoonee, and waring a partee hat before mah birfdai!
{{{{{SJ}}}}}
Hab fun tomorrow drinkin teh drinkees!
*Lukz uzzer way sew az not 2 b seeing*
*ennyfing dat lukz like Romeowz party.*
*Wawkz off wistuling.*
Hey! Romeo, we saw whut yoo did ther!
ohai, Janet! I’z slolee catching up awn teh goings awn, an wuz moast trubbled to reed abowt yur loss! I wishes dere wuz sumfing I culd sai or do to help yoo – but awl I can do iz gib yoo a big hug an a schmoo an let yoo kno dat iffn yoo eber needs anyfing, jes ask!!
.
{{{{{{{{{{Janet}}}}}}}}}}
{{{{{{Janet}}}}}}}
Hugs & schmoos frum me,too.
So sorry abowt yer loss.
{{{{{{{{Janet}}}}}}}} my thoughts and prayers ae with you
{{{{{{ Janet }}}}}}
Hugz n cheezluv, Janet
{{{{{Janet}}}}}
I am so very sorry to hear of your sad loss.
My thoughts are with you,and with your friends Family.
We are all here for you,as you know.And so much Cheezlove is coming to you right now,and in the days ahead.
Holding you in the lite Dear Janet,
Claire xxxx♥♥♥♥
o hai Janet. Ai sew sowwy tu heer bowt yur loss!
.
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{JCH4K}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
*offers JCH4K tea, sympathy, an ear if wanted, a shoulder if needed, and bukkits ob compassion*
{{{{{Janet}}}}}
Romeow holds u in his beeg floofy arms, and duzzn’t let go until u feelz better. Iz so sorry.
*gibs Janet a shmoo on her forehed*
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Janet}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Ai hab noe wurds to express mai sad furr yoo.
*gasp*Nawt “THE” Glorfindel?
Oh, {{{{{Janet}}}}}}} Ai em so sory tu heer abowt yur BFF. Mai Bff frum colij die wen she wuz oanlee 20 yeerz owld so ai noze ekzaklee haow yu feelz.
Ai lubs u peeps. Hugs fur {{{Janet}}}}, {{{{gmawairzgrenshuz}}}} and {{{{PB2K}}}}!!1!
Ai b reedin this fred an mai eyes leaked fur cheezfrens, din ai was rofl at teh werk antics and then teh troll list. (Sry if ai gib away teh plot if ur jus now reeding thru it.)
Ai had long day at werk an dis plaic iz sooo gud to com to at teh end ov teh dai. Fanks ebberyone. {{{{Cheezfrenz}}}} and teh big burgers who bring it tu us.
tru, tru, if annyplaice can help after a pleh day, this is it. I’ve hung out inna shop at wurt, hours after the trucks have left, decompressing wit da cheezepeeps.
.
.
hang in dere Janet, the sun will rise tomorrow. It may not be welcome at the moment, but it will rise.
Thank yoo soo much, stagehanddan.
It iz awl still so fresh – an there iz eben werse to com. But ai noe that evensualleee, ai will feel . . .it will purrhaps nawt hurt kiwte so much.
An ai am so glad that yoo ar heer too. an ai am so sorree taht ai hav purrhaps bin maeking peepl sad. But – rite nao – ai cannawt find teh happeh.
An ai thank yoo awl {{{{{awl cheezeefrenz}}}}}} fur maeking this just a liddle bit eezier to bear.
Ohai JCH4K … ai have been very busy and away frum home, so have not had time to be here much. So ai am late to tell you how sorry ai am to hear about your loss of your friend. {{{{{{janet}}}}}}}} I am holding both of you in the light. And ou know, I hope, that you do nawt have to ‘pologize for making peeple sad here. It is sadness mized with joy at being able to help, even a little.
you really need to read the Callahan’s series of books by Spider Robinson.
One of the sayings “Shared pain is lessened, Shared joy is increased.”
*Slams drink* whew , *throws empty glass into fireplace* *crash*
{{{{{{{{{Janet}}}}}}}}}}
Mai deepest condolences on the loss of your dear friend.
I’m so sorry, and wish there were more than just words to offer you.
//mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=1528620
{{{{{{{{Janet}}}}}}}} i cud only tell u whut awl the otters jus wus tellin u… an wurds nebber jus be abul 2 xplain feelins… but let meh sai it with Flavia Weedn’s wurds:
“Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same.”
Ai has beverajes tu? Hau we do dat?
Ai hasa prezent!
CCC coming…
Sweep up branes, scoop dem up an put back in 4.5k’s hedd
Fasten on 50s bavin cap an a CHRG (wdoi) an sikyoor wiv ducky taep
Hand a hot chokklit an a chokklit possum
Wrap in a floofee blankit.
Der, rest a bit til u feel better.
*sneeks up on annipuss whilst they’re CCCing, opens their head and pours in a cup of Teh Watur Frum Teh Fowntain Ob Eternal Yoof, wib a sprinkling of papryka to limit it to bringing them back to their 30s*
Iz gud 4 maekin strogonoff 2 an 2 sprinkul on cheez sors an iz spozed 2 b gud 4 sumfing medicul, but Ai doan `member wot!
Iz supposed tu mayk annipuss feel good, spritely, happy and dancey.
Sez sew in teh Cheezfriend’s Medikul Dishunari.
Yay 4.5K 4 ur nawt-sekkund! But U hadz teh splort inna prawsess…
***itteh bitteh kitteh CCC dryvur weelz CCC nekst 2 4.5K***
**sweepee sweepee sweepee braynz inna pyl**
**skoopee skoopee skoopee braynz bak inna hed**
**patteepatpat 2 smoov em owt**
**dukkeetayp 2 howd evvyfing 2gevvur agin**
**cuvverz hed wif bavvin cap wif pitcherz uv pandaz awn it**
**snapz CHRG wif drawinz uv bambew leevz awn hed **
**rapz 4.5K n warm, softee fwoofee bwankee*
Dere naow .. dat otter hep U recubber frum da splort… Hav sum steemin hawt chokklit wif bambew shewtz n sum chokklit possumz wif kremee fillinz 2 hep U gitz ur strengf bak, den rilaks inna cumfee chayr at da Splort Lownj
Sorree … uh liddul sloe cuz wooden U noez dat I wood gitz 5 seprit fone cawlz wyl I wuz triein 2 hep 4.5K wif herz splort…
As long as yu got alla her braynes bak inna rite place…is all gud!
Werd-poopie eated mai rescue. Hear it iz agin, jus in caes.
EYEOOOGAH!!! EYEOOOGAH!!! EYEOOOGAH!!!
CCC iz hear fur 4.5K. Stand bak ebberybuddy!
*rummages around fur shubbel an dustpann* A-Ha! Hear it iz! Scoopeey scooppey scoopity
pores braynes inna 4.5K’S hed, tuk, tuk, tukity, tuk
pat, pat, pattacaek pat,
grabs 50s BC(w/doi) an streches it awn teh hed SNAP! fastens chinny strap
luks fur dukky taype, rummage,, rummage, rummage, Eureeka!
Brripppt, taypee, tayppe, taypity taype
puts floofy blankee wit teh sheeps onnit around 4.5k and tukz her ins tite. *
Heres ur chokklit martoonie and sum caviar-shayped gummies. Nau u rests! Mama Goosey sez so!
Oh, and conga ratz shoe laces on ur nawt sekkund!
Oh wauw, waht a speggtakular multiplol reskew..! if i has an exident, all i can wish iz u peeps is arownd to safes me!!
Yeas!! An dey carries teh round people-catchy-thingy, too…in case yu needs to jump from a libarry shelf or somefing.
Why in teh whirled would anybuddy be up on top a libarry shelf?
Teh mind boggles.
*luks acskan… axcanss… asscans…. gibs lcb a funny luk*
O hai, LCB!
*wispurrs tew LCB…*
Psst – LCB — luk up dere on tawp uv teh libarry shelf. Aifinkso dere *mite* be sumfing shinee & sparklee up dere…
NOOOOOOooo, dont incurrij her!
Hmmm… N I doan spoaz U finkz ENNYBODEE wood EBBER b kawt sumplays liek up onna raftur inna Nottee Barn…
*snurk*
*weeklee frum chare in Splort Recubberee Ward* O. Mai. Gudness. Dat were a big wun. Braynes ebreeware. After so manee kitteh lolpix, teh cyootness ob dah pandah tuk mii toadalee unnawares (NAWT unnerwares, FPU oar ovverwies). Such gud cares ai be getting frum teh cheezfrens – fank y’all mushlee!!!1!
Leeza, ai finso a massaj R in order. (Bin finking dis IRL, BTW.)
*collapses bak in chare n sips on martoonie n nibbels on chokklits n gummees*
awww this makes me have a happy-sad
Interspecies romance…
Their lub wuz teh wun wifowt a naem…
Some enpanda-d evening…. ♫ ♫ ♫
*heddesk*
(an, fer a bonus: eerwurm!)
♫♫♫
People will say we’re in love…
♫♫♫
yoo unnerstudying Curlee? (i’z slolee gittin awl caut up awn teh confuzzling farmer/cowman situashun in OK)
Nope. Just yoosin a song frum teh show. How has yoo been, gurl?
I’z bin okay (ell aa aitch oh em aa)! I’z sitting heer wif no blud cownts to speek ov, so I’z also bery bery tired. Climbing teh 1.5 flight ov stares to mai apartmint iz cause fer a nys sit-down wif teh kittehs. Gib me anodder week, an I’ll be sumwuht bedder.
.
I’z sure dere’s a gud Aunt Eller pun sumwehre in mai lief, but sadlee, nuffink iz coming to mind… mai kemo brayne – lemme sho yoo it!
{{{{{{ Martha (pb2k) }}}}}}
Hugz n cheezluv, Marfa
{{{{{{PB2K}}}}}}}
I is glad u is dere wif teh kittehs tho, but I can gibs u an Aunt Eller kwote!
“U gots to take the good, and the bad, and say, well, alright then!”
dats para-fazed.
ai dont saiz dat, and ai be a Ant Ellen in real lief. Da r must make teh diffronce
“Lot’s of things happen to folks. Sickness, er bein’ pore and hungry even — bein’ old an afeared to die. That’s the way it is — cradle to grave. And you can stand it. They’s one way. You gotta be hearty, you got to be.”
{{{{{{PB2k}}}}}}} Ai wuz jus fink yestdy we nawt be hering frum yu so yu mus be nawt feline wel enuf. Haop yu ‘z getting beddur. Iz da OK eerwurm enny beddur oar wurs dan da goatherd wun? ai hab dat fur 3 daiz . Ai’m skairt wut hapunz abowt tumoro wen ai waikz up. ♫
*snerk*
I triez 2 mayk it upz 2 yoo
Heer, has a bamboo martoonie.
Yu’ll feel bedders soon.
Wachout fer teh splinters…
it’s called FIBUR.
s’gud for u! Want wun??
*pours Maus a martoonie in a cureeous shade uv green*
Sry. I has a meeting inna fyoo minnits. Tell ya whut: I’ll taek it wif me. Mebbe wun of Teh Soots will want it.
maus, takin martoonie to meetin iz onlee wai to deel wif de dilburts inna meetin!
… but u knows sumone will say, did u bring some for everrywun??
*hands Maus a picher*
Iz nawt teh Dilberts in teh meeting dat aer teh problem. It’s teh pointy-haired bosses, the Dogberts, the Ratberts, the marketeers. The Alices aren’t a problem, so long as you spike their coffee with something that’ll drive them berserk and point them at a pointy-haired boss.
ai lefted taht whirld a fyoo yeerz ago… hadda PHB to end all PHB… happy ending is, when ai quit, hiz boss demoted him, and gave his job to the other woman engineer whut he used to beat up on every day. sum justiss inna whirld, ennyway
I hadded uh baws wuntz hoo wuz putted n himz puzishun bai himz daddee, hoo wuz wun uv da hy-upz… Win sorghum-stenchez chaynjded n himz daddee wun noe lawngur da awl-powrfull peep dat himz thot himz wuz, mai baws wuz prawmplee letted goe. Da manijer n charj uv mai sekshun towld me inna meatin afturwerdz dat mai foarmur baws “wuz uh teribul baws n a teribul manijur, n hadded noe biznizz bein n da puzishun dat himz wuz…”
…
I haytz nepotizm…
“War can I puts mai cuzzin/kid/sibling/bff war he kannawt do dammidj? I noes! IT! Or mebbeh production! Dey duzzent hannel de munnies . . .ebbreefing will be ok.”
Den is de uvver ppls fawlt wen ebbreefing is borked.
Yeh, reelee… Bin dere, dun dat, n gotted da T-shurt n matchin kauphy mug…
…
Mai x-baws neerlee rooinded uh hyooj klassiff… classuf… berree sekrit daytabays prawjikt bai nawt noein wat himz wuz dooin. Himz pikt da rong op-purr-aytin sistum n da rong daytabays pakij 4 wat wuz neaded. Ifn I dint noez haow 2 proegram n assimblee layngwij n rite uh rezidint proegrum 2 krekt da mayjur prawblimz, n den figger owt haow to git da daytabays pakij 2 werkz wif da proegrum, it wooda kawstid prolly uh kwartur-millyun dollerz (oar moar) 2 riplays da sawftwear n reproegram da daytabays…
…
N I hadded rekumminded da krekt op-purr-aytin sistum n daytabays pakij at da nawt-sekkund meatin … GRRRRRR!!1!
I wurked four a compani wun thyme that hired a new vice president. Beber haz vice been such an appropryate wurd. Hi was neber cawt doing anyfing rong, but hi woz cleber and ebil. Mowst ob teh engineers kwit nawt long after in prowtest.
Bringing ur laptop too?
I iz postin, izzint I?
Ur nawt postu
Soots: Faster! Bedder! Bigger! Cooks Pizza! Yadda!
Me: Does you has a money?
Soots: A money? Ov corse not!
Me: *Sigh*
wate! I’z bin in dis meeting!
.
or mebbe….dere ar onlee a fyoo meetings, an tehy jes git recyculed ober an ober agin.
.
ask teh Soots iffn tehy haz a meerakul.
Ai fink u may be rite, ai has serpently been in teh same meetin moar dan wunce. An last week ai wus asked teh same kweschun, by teh same person, in 12 diffrent emails! An ai ansurd dem awl an she still didn’t unnerstand! So ai shot her.
need anee help wif teh, um, “kleening up” bits?
Yaaaaay!
Shooting someone is bad form at my job: it might get you talked about…
I lubz a storee wif a happee ending!!
Ai’s finkin of transferrin to HR, wut u fink?
Ai heered it be wun ob moast stressfil ob jobs, my eggspeeryints, let me sho yoo it!
Ai’s finkin wiv my payshunce an peeple skills ai wud be a natcheral. “U is nawt happy in ur job? Stop whinin! U is lukky to HAS a job!! U cannawt do ur jawb becaws it is difficult? U is teh stoopie! U has teh prolms… huh, let me tell u bowt MAI prolms!” An ob corse, for teh rly difficult employees – “ai has a 45 anna shuvvel an ai dowt NEwun is going to miss u.”
Mai carin nachur, let me show… uh, wait, is heer sumwehr… uh, nebber mind.
Akshooly, martoonie, a lotta HR peeps are alreddy liek taht. Tehy yooses niecer werds, but teh meenings teh saem…
Maus, with the peeps I work with, shooting may not cause much talk, ripping some twit’s head off and using it for a planter will not only get ya talked about, it will be graded on style, efficicency, and floral arranging.
yoo iz in horticulture?? oar polytiks?
well summada folks er dim enough to require watering twice daily. and they tend toward tilting at the sun.
I’ve seen FERNS quicker on the uptake.
Bwahahahaahahahahhahahahaha;osujvs’o[ubwduhvnw’dovnwaelvjlvnawdkj
Oops, Ai felld awn mai keebord, laffing!
Teh meetings getz recycled ober an ober agin… jus liek holiday frootcaek?
Meetings aer dezined arownd three basik skripts: Macbeth, King Lear and Hamlet.
Ok, lemme see:
Macbeth – Kill teh boss, so yu can has his job. But tehn go mad wiv teh gilt an get killt bai enneewun born bai C-sekshun
King Lear – be meen to teh oenlee wun hoo’s nys to yu, get yur iys poekd owt an go mad in a funder storm, onna heeth
Omlet – Pertend yu’r bonkers, dryv yur gurlfren bonkers, ebbereewun but yur bessy maet gets killt
Ai donut want to go to no moer meetings! EVER!
Ambercat, I luv it! Shaykspeare, ICHC style! Omlet wuz mah fayvrit. He had egg on himz fayc, I thot . . .
Sownz family yar. Ai fink u bedder has anudder martoonie. Heer, ai disgized it in a pollystyreen cawfee cup. Dey’ll nebber no teh diffrents.
Wun uv mai un-faborite storeez:
Manglement sed wii need dis dun.
Wii sed, wii can doing it if Upper Manglement sez ok.
Upper Manglement sed, wii will support this effort.
Wii worked up plan, submitted $ rekwest to Upper Manglement.
Upper Manglement sed, adn I kwotez:
“Wii sed wii wud support it, wii didn’t say wii wud fund it.”
.
Retirement: reward 4 putting up wif stoopee. I haz it.
Wut was tehy plannin to do to support it? Wear t-shirts wiv it’s name awn?
possiblee gib it gud foundashun-ware?
I fink dey wud support it bai saying it wuz
dere idea, adn dey didded awl deh hard werk
adn luk at wut gud leederz dey r 2 git deh
“liddul peepz” 2 following dere fine zample
adn accepting deh award 4 getting it dunded
wifowt expending ennee fundz.
Dem Upper Manglement peepz b gud 4 supporting u like dat. I havb seen dem at dere finest.
O/T, Cween, how is teh leg todai? did dey figger out wutwasit?
Ai werks wiv (nawt “in”, juss “wiv”) Local Guvermunt, an EGGZAKLY tihs ting happnd! As a reesult, Swine Town is NAWT a Cycle Demon Strayshun town, has NAWT gotted £10000000000000000 forrm teh guverment, did NAWT pass Go and is goin strate to jayul! An Ai is still teh oenlee Byk-it gurl in Swine Town – but taht’s OK, akchully!
Deh leg b better. Best guess is just muskul strain. Take 2 pillz ebberyy day, if not bedder in a week kum bak, wii guess agin.
o ambercat u paw fing wurkin wiv low cal guvt… an pittee bout de munnys n wotnot cos Swine Town wud bee much improovd wid sum deemuns strayin roun, on saikls or nawt…
Dis sew tru bout teh retire mint. Tot speshul needz kidlets 4 27 yeers. Retar mint iz mai reward 4 nawt shuutin groan ups (most lee speshul needz snooperbizers).
ai likes ur cattitude!
Wut bammbu fibur rely iz gud fur iz tu maik pjammeez. Berry cumfy.
Ur rite – iz bery nice!
Lets hab a hug
nd a big {{{{{{{{{{{ ebreebuddee}}}}}}}}}}}
Bear hug!
Dat’s jus’ panda-ing tew the bear tho.
@@@@@
I gibs u huggs an’ maek it awright.
Hugz maek EBBEREEFINK awlrite!…………………….Ai can has a hug?
Ob corse!!
{{{{{{{{{{{{Ambercat}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Ahhhhhhh, awl bedder nao!
Snorgle snorkel, plz!
Wow – anudder 7-way macra-may! Niec going — concatshoolayshuns!
almost 8!
the competishuns gettin’ stiff!
Iz taht hour eufamizm fer teh dai?
*blushes and runs to teh NB*
To teh nawty barn wif yu, Goosey!
Too much starch in tehre clothes?
Ai iz stiff frum arfritis!
u wants a nice mAssage wif 4.5 kittehs Annipuss?
Wud that halps teh arfritis?
It mite halp, thx – Ai’ll trie rubbin in sum ibuprofen gel at bedtiem.
Emu oil iz supposed to be good, tu.
Spose adn Ai bofe can haz teh arfritis. Wii r wundrin iffen uh heet lamp mite help. Nebber kin 2 B gettin teh heetin pad jus rite. Whut u tink, Annipuss? Hab u tryyd taht? NEbuddy?
B care full wit teh heet lamp, eubie. I haf a tube sock filled wif buckwheat an ai heet it in teh micro wave. 2 ov them corn form nisely 2 meh contours.
Really! How rude!
Ifn it wasn’t fer teh custumerz u cud git sum werk dun! Sumtymez custumerz r teh pleh! Glad Iz retyred. Kinda. I dismember mai custumer servus dais. Pleh!
{{{Aahz}}}
I wooda liekted 2 haz dismemburd summa da peepz I had 2 hepz bak n mai urlee daiz uv pooter sport…
…
I gunna haz 2 goez naow … I wuz LOLin wyl da tayp uvva weddin wuz lowdin n2 da edditin pooter, but itz dun naow sew I gotz 2 werkz awn it…
…
N wooden U noez — I gotted anuvver cawl wyl tiepin dis kwmint 2!!
wii aura onna roll (wheel youse guise R) imma
hoppin 2C 10 comints loggered inna :00 time
AWWWWWWW!!!
I WANT TO HUG A GIANT PANDA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mi 2.
Sew lawng az him nawt hug back too hard…
haha, me too.
*GROUP HUG!!!*
I’ve had bamboo shoots and bamboo in Chinese food…guess bamboo martoonies won’t be 2 bad…
I’ll drink to dat!
Iz bettur dan de drinksh dat a fren ob mien maeks.
Hiz nick-naem is “Doc. He maeks deh frozzin dackerees, an puts a stick in dem.
He calz dem Doc’s Hickoree Dackarees.
*heddesk*
Ai lieks dat!
…
Pandas endangered themselves.
Dumb super-specialized creature. It’s a wonder they didn’t go extinct long ago.
:p
Iz there a troll convenshun todai we werent notifyed abowt?
Ai cheked teh bookings four teh building. Teh Troll convention iz suppowst tu be in teh basement. On reqwest ob Basement Cat, whu iz apparently kwite hungri.
Thank goodness the expert is finally here!
**bleen!**
please pull over and present your superior certificate of smug, kthxbai
**snert**
hay! is this a noo categorry?
I forgotted who has teh troll list.
Is there a ‘trollier than thou’ on it??
dunt noah wear ta list is
butter yer write sum1 flung open teh troll gate 2dai
“trollier than thou” – snert!
Hai leeza-b.
I haz a copy i gotted frum JanetWhoKnowzEbberreefing. Hmmmm. Lemme see if I can finding it. Ah! dere it b.
*Gitz owt Gremlin’s Slightly Amended Troll Taxonomy*
.
1. Da “dis not funny” troll.
2. Da “don’ do dis wif yor poor kitty!” troll (aka caretroll)
3. Da “poyntz takin awai” troll
4. Da “photoshopped!” troll
5. Da “I hatez yor polittical vyewz an I despizes yor wai ov puttin things” troll
6. Da “yew tawkz beh-beh tawk; gidda reel lief!” troll
7. Da “I sawr dis pishoor befoar (inna WalMart/kard shop, on dis site, etc. etc.)” troll
8. Da “ebberybuddee alreddee sedded it 10 timex but I’m not gunna reed ennyfing but I’ll post it wun moar time!” troll
9. Da “wai ar yoo cawling tehm ’sumthing’ wen tehy ar cleerlee ’sumthing else’” troll
10.Da “wun burger” troll (vry simular to “poyntz takin awai” troll)
.
I duzn’t see a ‘trollier than thou’ on it. Guess I’ll have 2 updating deh list.
*heaves huge sigh. Addz number leben 2 deh list.*
.
I b leeving deh number 10 on deh list 4 sentimental reezinz. Maybe sumday deh burgerz kum bak?? I livez in hope.
Me too!
Ai livs in Swine Town, but Ai’s goin to Hope for mai Teem Meeting, in Septembulay, dus taht cownt?!
Iz gud to habs dis his-storee of trollz and of ICHC.
Ebben if duz not get burgerz back, rest of peeps shud no
about hao it waz in deh dayz ub gibbing burgersz.
Cheezmasters, I iz techiee. I nose dat de burzurg maed deh serburz go “pleh”.
I even nose Y dey maeded deh serburs go “pleh”. Still, I wants dem back.
Or *sumting* dat will lets us show pre-she-ayshun for commints. )
MomCatAnna, yu can go werk for teh Big Chezes an bring bak owr brgrs?! Pleespleespleespleespleesplees!!!
I not finkso I can due a job wid ICHC. Dey is not nearly to mai howm.
I haz tree kidlets, naow out ob skool for deh sumner. My use-you-al
babee sittur had a new babbeh yesterday. An itteh bitteh beyoutimus girleh.
An mai hubehcat trabels almowst all de tiem fer his teckee job.
I can gibs advices onlee. Not reel fixing ob deh problims.
Sorreh Ambercat.
*Puts on Geek Hat (with Propeller)*
I think that’s why they’re hiring a top-shelf .NET programmer. They used to rely on canned/commercial JavaScript for the burgers.
Canned burgers?!????!!!!1!!!!!!elebenty??!!!!! Sai it iz nawt sew!!!!
…
Cheezburger in a can – pleh! DO NAWT WANT!!!
Beddur dan Prints Alburt inna can…………
A canny young canner from canney
Once asked this thought to his granny,
A canner can can
Anything he can,
But a canner can’t can a can, can he?
I’ll betcha a sufficiently motivated canner……………….has the ability to do so.
*borrows geek hat*
I’d like to think they are working on implementing a comment-rating system into wordpress like what they have on youtube, with a teeny little burger instead of “thumbs up”. Dunno what to use for “thumbs down” though. Maybe that’s where they are stuck.
Perhaps a pickle?
*gives hat back to Maus*
“I doan wanna pickle…”
♪ Just wanna ride mai moder sikkle.
Arlo — FTW!!!!
I doan wanna die……
.
I jus wanna ride my motorcy….
.
kle.
U noez … Ifn dey tukded awl da JabbaDeHutSkript outta doze dang adz, da payjiz wood lode fasterer n da serberz wooden b obber lowdid. Dudden hep dat awl da adz r prolly lowded wif serber-syd inkloodz, wich awlsew yooziz serber tym. Den dey mite can haz sum server tym lefted 4 cheezburgerz…
…
I noez dey hasta gitz da ad munneez 2 pai 4 da syt, but G wiz Y dew da adz hafta suk da lyf outta da payjiz n da serberz? Kynda kownter-pruduktiv, ifn U askiz me…
A noolee discovvered troll then!
Dats kewl! No wayte….
Oh well. It duz seem distinkly different frum teh otters.
Um, wut is a ‘poynts taken awai’ troll? I do not member habbin come across that before.
I not b noeing dat partickular troll.
I gues it b habing 2 due wif deh burgerz.
A noo spesheez of Troll? Hmm. It will niid a sientifik naym. I suggest: Trollerus Troglodytus Superioritus Egotus.
Is ok. De remdee is de same fur awl uv dem. Releese de billy-goat.
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
!!
cheezburger wiv cheez an extra cheez 4 u!
billy-goat?
Ai fot wee haded Allie, teh fyumigator, hu lurvd 2 munch awn teh trollz.
Janet (jch4k) brot Allie in-2 plaa weneber teh trollz showd tehir trollee
selbz, n sumtymz Sweetpea (Mary O’spocken) wud du teh ahnerz.
Kind ov like teh care troll wif a borked givadamner.
Akshully, Ai can B habbin teh wundrin bowt tihs 4 sum time. Haow comin teh panders doan noes how 2 maik behbehs? Seems nawt sew difficult. Aim jes sayin.
*sniffles*
I lurves super-speshul creatures.
AWL creechurs R sooper-speshul, incloodin awl ob us!
Aim uneek in dat I’m nawt speshul. Oh. Wayt. Dat wuud maek me speshul too.
Awl ov tehse gourgeeuus creeshures, liek pandahs, pololbears, tigures, etc.,
needez owr halp, iyn ordure foar tehms tuu remayne onna Plahnit Earf!!!
Synce weez hyuoomins bees teh cairetaikers ov Earf, weez shud hav teh luuve adn kunsyderashun foar awl teh uvver aminule iynhahbitents az wel:
tehms depends awn owr caire iyn ordure tuu keap awn livvyng!!!!
Lettuce nawt leyt tehms daown!!!
You know,CCKK…us hoomins are prolly teh only spesheez dat cud go extink and teh Earf wud go “whew….bout time”…know what I’m sayin?
yes, dear CrazyLol. its a race Btween compassion n greed to see if hoomins become gud stewards of Earth.
As long az we r tawkin bout lub fur teh odder animule inhabitants ov teh earf, let’s nawt furget bout teh animals on teh factory farms. Sum horrible fings happen to dem. Their lives, transport and slaughter can b full ov lose.
.
I kno dat dis iz nawt a popular topic, but I fink dat peeps dat r gonna eat meat, shud maek sure dat teh animals r raised and slaughtered in a humane manner.
u make an xcellent point, Romeow.
Ai haz been tinkerin wif teh vegetarian diet for abowt a month now(4 days vegetarian,3 days limited meat)….
Wut Romeow jus said maykes me want to go 100% veggy-tarian !
Hai Eeck!
Waz eazy fur meh to go veggie – ober 25 yeers nao. I didz it for lots ov reasons, but a huge one waz dat I didn’t want to contribute to teh suffering ov animals on factoryfarms. I wud neber do those fings to mah kitteh, so why wud I do dem to odder animals?
.
Iz a purrsonal decision – I’m not heer to judge or preech.
I fink we reely has to hab more humane laws for factory farms. Iz sad.
wuz sooooooo terribul seein teh downer cows……….. ai find maiself eetin less n less meat cause sew hard tew digest……..
Ai sai “Ai eet enneefink, so lawng as it has had teh charnse to frollic awn a hillsyd” – werks for me!
U eats kittehs and goggies, too? OMG!
Ummm…I founded sumwon else to cat-sit for me.
Fanks ennyway.
Eerm, mai buchrs dunt sell kittehs an goggies. Dus yurs?! Yikes!
Yur rite nd we du furgit berry eezlee wen we just se in pakijz. Ai wuznt shur da 6$ free ranj , gras fed hangubur wud be gud but rely wuz, wifout enny sezuning at awl. Un 4 chun8lee nawt ebreebuddy can pai dat. nd wile weer at it ai’m traing tu bai lokul fudz if ai can. dis iz berry gud tiem tu lib in Calfurneez, nawt dat ai wantz ebreebuddy els tu cum heer.
OMGyesh! Ai lib N byootimus rural area, but rly puur. Ownlee wais 2 maik teh munneys Bs lumbrin adn raisen checkins. Will nawt go N2 wun maiself, but have herd horrific thins bout teh checkin howzes–obercrowdin, no sleep at nite, cuttin off teh beex. Mini, mini ub tehm awl ebberwear. Bad karmas. h8s 2 eben drive bi tehm, but no can leeb hoam wifout it.
ai hadda sad when teh expurts recentlee sed teh polah bayers cud be ekstinck in 40 years, cuz ai reealyzed iz within mai lyftime – ai cud be 80 yearz old an see headlyne taht sez, last polah bayer haz dyed.
DO NAWT WANT!!!
*crying softly*
anom, an anom.
An dat nastee man (nawt in a fun “nawtee barn” sorta wai) runnin teh US uv A has a *seveerlee* borked givadammer. Nawt shoor himz eber HAD a givadammer tew bein wif.
…
Contempt for teh Odious Little Munkee Man — let mii sho u it!!!
“…givadammer tew *begin* wif.”
…
His givadammer izn’t borked when it cums to oil.
Iffs iz gud fur beeg oil cumpanies, iz gud fur Ahmerika.
.
November can’t cum fass enuf fur me.
whyle ai dont lyke pollytishuns (wich iz whut wee has, insted of LEADERS)… aifink alsew iz teh economists whut keep modeling on “hyuge growth” instead of “steady state” or even just “sensible growth”. An Madsion Ave whut keepz sayin MOAR MOAR MOAR MOAR MOAR. They iz hand in gluv.
Do nawt want, or need.
Except moar kittehs, an cheezburgers.
anom
Aww, that got me all teared up! ;^^ Too cute!
Ai rememer dis1
Just FYI fur anywun woo carez.
Dis pikchur is how ai feelz abowt da ammimulz EBBURY SINGUL DAI.
is ai du onlee wun?
No, panfer, ur nawt teh onwee one.
I’m wif u.
mi 2, sumdai i hopes 2 bee abull tew werk 4 teh wild animals, til den
i hasta support teh animul wellfair charteez & consevashun cawszez
dat meh tu. Ai nawt haz lawtz uf munneez, but ai gibs tu da ammimmulz awl tiem. Alzo free waze, lik Care2.com an da fing ware yoo push da buttonz ebbry dai to gibz munneez frum adburtizurz.
nawt teh onlee wun bye a lawng way.
ai lubz teh ammimulz beree mush!!!
No, Panfer, u nawt teh ownlee wun.
Wee r s’post 2 b kaer-takurz, gardiuns n kustodiunz ob teh Erf.
U wud liek “Rule Golden,” a storee in whitch an alien forst hoominz 2 feel wut tehy kawzd odders 2 feel, inkluding odder aminulz. Manee fings chanjded.
{{{{{ Pandas }}}}} {{{{{ aminulz }}}}}
ai du want to reed dat storee. woo iz bai?
Panfer, Ai feals taht waiy tuu, ebbereedaiy ov teh yeer!!!!!
no, mee too
NAWT at awl, panfer, nawt at awl {{{panfer}}}
Iz Uz also sorry bout global warmings
Nobodee haz made a joke usin wurd pandamonium yet. Whatz wrong with us?
Ai tink yu juss steppd into teh breech! Well Dun Greasycat!
Hay greasycat! Wii can shaer a birfdai!! w00t woot!!
May 28 rulz w00t w00t!!
U guys r lucky i didnt has a birfdai party. I just gots cake.
Itz always a good tyme fur cake! Any dai, any xcuse.
aill gib yoo caek on freiday – iz mai birfday
*takes note*
Will u be heer on Friday leosmom??
*splutters* but…but…but…cake IS a party!!
.
.
.
iddnt-it?
well, duh. uv corse!
Unless teh caek is a lie.
…
*runzawai wif a kwikness, giggloling awl teh way*
Hay, but dis iz ICHC — we kin mayk da caek uh reealitee!!
ooooh, caek! Ai nawt gettinged caek on mai birfdai. Ai finkso ai go maek:
Anjel fud caek
Banananana caek
Caramel caek wif chokklit icing, oar iz dat chokklat caek wif caramel icing??
D…
Devil’s Food (kinda chokkie)
Easter bunneh shaped cake
Fruikcake
G…
Grate BEEG piece uv caek cut frum
Hyuuuuge caek big enuf fur all teh cheezpeeps, an uv corse
IYSE CREEM!!
J…
Jack Daniel’s kawfee caek
Kawfee caek (regoolar)
Lemon caek
Moar caek
N…
Grand Marnier caek
Hunnee caek
Incrediblee yummy caek
Jellee beens, caek decorated wif
K…
Kaluah iced chockolate
Lime icing onna lemon cake
Milk,Milk,and more Milk (known as tres leches)
Nom-i-nomnom,nommibule
O..
GMTA, shd.
Oringe pounded caek (not poisin)
Pinee-appul Upside Down Caek
QweenMJ’s royal fabirate caek
Rushin Spice Caek wid hazelnuts fillings
S…
milk x 3 = tres leches
*heddesk*
iz serious, and is veddy good, addictive even.
ohai, shd, ai knoes whut it iz. ai iz just *um* appresheeaytin yur pun.
berry clebber! but still, *heddesk*.
oar, az ai say in mai house,
“WOOF.”
ya wanna know the sad part?
.
I wasn’t trying for a pun, I’m just naturally a goon.
well, mebbe it wuz nawt a pun eggzacklyy — but still wuz berry clebber! an berry WOOF.
Ai sede sumbuddee maik it awn teebee uvvur dai. nom
I had some at work, a relative of one of the ladies in catering made one. They had to post guards, with sticks, and mai photograph.
Kiwifroot & strawberries on teh whippee creem frawsting (call teh skwerls!)
Lemon Chiffon Caek
Marbul Caek (teh choklit & teh yellow caek swirleed togeddur)
N…
An agin we gets obelapping lists.
GMTA, nightshayde.
does this mean we get three cakes after the lists’re done?
Kuchen
Lemin caek wid candee lemin slices
Moar caeks dan peeps to eated dem
‘Nilla caek wid reel beens of ‘nilla orkids
O…
Ornj but nawt poizun kak
Purpool izing awn a ganilla kake
Qwik bred, wich iz liek kake
R….
Single-Eggey Caek (from deh depreshun cuking buk)
Trifell (Ai’m gonna make dis for dinner todai!)
Upside-dowun carmel appul cake
V…
Very gud caek
Whole lotta caek
Xstreemlee lardj caek
Yello caek wif sour cream chocolate frosting
Ze most cake inna whirld
yello caek wiv choklit frosting! mai favorite!
Oreo cheezcaek
Pound caek
Quarter-sheet caek
Raspberry tawping
S…
i liek white cake wit alll sorts o colours of icing.
mai little sara lieks wet tuna. but so do i. is dat weird? 0_o
depends whether or not the tuna and cake are combined. that would be a tad on the weird side.
Hao mush IS a “tad”, in spayse myles, eggzakly?
it is a flexible form of measurement, usually defined via tone, inflection, and body language.
An nawt a jiunt, goldun running shoo?
The Heart of Gold, makes it’s own rulz. but an improbability drive is good for that.
I want this ship. Plz? I hazza towel.
sas dat hoopy frood MelONyx, dey reely know where dey towl iz.
Dus tehy sell tehm at Wulwerfs?
Mebbee teh hyoomin is givin lessins in flirtin to teh panda. I unnerstans tehy has a promlem wif interpandalol relashuns. Liek teh femaels only bein innerested in s*x for abowt fiev minnits a year an teh maels not remebrin their birfdays an things.
Lik bein married?
stay married long enough and you get to reverse that
As a wummin in her 50’s, I re-assembul dat remark.
mai DH waytin wiv bayted bref, aifinkso.
Is nawt so grate, akshually. I hate fergettin things. Um, wut was we talkin bout?
um, ai fink it wuz pandas.
taht’s it.
yoo lookin in mai diaree again?
i needz insulin, shot, dis iz too sweet
That’s soooo cute!!
IT’S JACK BLACK.
Wait, y hooman talking like lolcat?
Wen in Rome, do as teh Romans… ok, Greeks, Egypshuns, Gauls adn Etruscans do wen dey’re in Rome.
what? sack the playse?
That was my upload with a different message. Why no credit to me?
They don’t credit the uploader, only the source of the picture (if given, when the image is uploaded) and the person writing the lol. Which is fair enough – uploading the image is a lot easier than taking the photo, after all. However, if you DID take the photo, or actually own the rights to it, or something like that, there’s a link under the image where you can tell the administrators about the incorrect accreditation.
.
Personally, I think it would be nice to give SOME mention of the uploader, if only because what we upload is a reflection of our interests and therefore of us. However, I don’t know how you’d do that and avoid diminishing the two current credits.
We haz 2 mayk less peeples. No point making more pandas when people are destroying their habitats because they’re in competition with them for the same, scarce, resources.
Ai haz sum nominayshunz fur peeple tew be remooved frum teh whirled. Kwite a fyoo, akshullee.
Iss otai. Wii R gonna dum rselbs outta X is stance, N a bit. Darwin wuz rite.
Noe, da peepz n charj uv owr edyoomukayshunal sistum r gunna dum owr kidletz outta X is stance…
…
But I beddur gitz awf mai sope boks b4 I fawl n gitz herted…
Gud eevnin, nightshayde!
I noez sum ppl hoo wood kwalifie 2 b poastur chillunz 4 “retroe-aktiv birf kuntrowl”
Moar pandehs!
I’m doing mah part – no kids – only kittehs.
Awwwwwww … Ai LUBS dis capshun. Well dun.
The World Wildlife Fund should use this as a poster. Seriously.
Actually, a great many of the lols would make superb postcards or posters for improving human’s compassion for animals. After all, it is a common basic assumption that animals are lesser, so treatment is unimportant. The lols may not be “scientifically accurate” (in reality, cats are far smarter – ok, kittehs, you can put those baseball bats down) but they might start getting people to think of animals as having families, friends and dreams for the future too. Too much anthropomorphizing (ie: humanizing) isn’t great, but at the moment there simply isn’t enough.
Beautiful picture. Rly.
wow
thats a cute pic
*Sniffle* Oh that’s the sweetest, saddest pic ever…
This one is so sweet and sad!
da picturez only tooo kyoot to be true an’ dat means…oh noes!!!
*SPLORT* *CRACK*
mah…braynz….cant find…tehm….halp!…anyone?
wurkin’ on it……wait one.
huwwy… mah braynz where r u?!
*Energize brayne-dar, beep-beep-beep, sort-sort-sort*
*Skoopz up da braynes and kleenz dem so no durrty (leebin the durty stuff dat wuz dere to begin wit) stuff iz on ‘em*
*patz dem in playse*
*Duck-duck-duck taype!*
*Putz bayfing kap wif kerrit pattehn*
*Wrapz Hashim wiff floofy wool blankit and givz hot chokklit wif mawshmallos in it*
*sends Quasim message to watch de brovver*
oh dats bettur..!
thx {{{{{stagehanddan}}}}}! or i wouldnt hab found mah brynz!
*two-fingered salute* annytime
i like da CCC choklit and mawshmallows, dey be real nice!!1!
should ask da CCC fur da recipe!
Ennywun haz enny detayls bout dis pic? Plz to knows teh sitchuashuns!
OMG, PANDA HUGZ!
OMG, I died of kyoot!
Awwe, I’d love to hug a panda!
I’ze feel ashamed. Dx
question: howz to make favuwate?