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we shall scratch dem on teh sofas,



cat

we shall scratch dem on teh sofas, we shall scratch dem in teh gardens, we shall nebur surrendur!

until we gits caught nd put in jayl.

picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: lobs2

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» 188 Comments

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» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.

 
  1. We shall scratch dem everywhere!

  2. bunniwaz says:

    CHHAAARRRGGGEE!!!

  3. nightshayde says:

    We shall scratch them in a boat. We shall scratch them with a goat.

  4. lainofthewired says:

    Nebur surendur! Neber stahp! Alwais Furrrward! Alwais- AH SMELZ CATSNIP! *runs off stage*

  5. Winston Churchlol kitteh will be sober in teh mornings but u will still be teh ugly.

  6. bunniwaz says:

    Wutz teh colors uv teh Kittehland Flag??

  7. bunniwaz says:

    Mebbe a slice uv red fer what happenin ifn teh pointee ens getcha?

  8. sarahbear says:

    i shall call him Tux

  9. laughoutloud says:

    conga rat shoe laces!

  10. Daroach says:

    teh kitteh leedr speeks.

    • Aahz says:

      Lord John Whorfin Kitteh:
      “Histree iz mayd at nyt!
      Kerriktur iz wat U r inna dark!
      We muss werk wyl da klok sheeza tikkin!!”

  11. Tekniik says:

    they mai take pointy ends but neber take our FREEDOM!!!

    • sarakitty says:

      butz summtiems they taekz teh harblz. Sigh.

    • kitkay says:

      I noe itz considered Evil 2 declaw kittehs, but I am afrayd ov B N scrached by my too noo littel kittens. Becuz I haz lupus, an so my immune system is naught so grate, akshually. I can has infekshuns rlly Easelly, and, whenever I git poked ore scratched (like frum blackberry thorns), I get nasty bleedz under my skin, that mayke me look lyke I am inna slasher film. (that’s whut my son no. won, who was a film (FVS) major sed.) It’s a type of vasculitis, becuz my blood vessel R fagile or sumfing, and then I am supposed 2 tayke steroyd pills. N E way, my grey tabby, Dr. VIrjay, came 2 mii as a stray, declawed on awl fores!!! (pore fing), butt issa berry gutsy cat. Baby Brother and sister hav little needel clause—not 2 bad yet.
      Whut’s teh best way 2 protect myself frum skratches? Trim teh clause (whut’s teh best way 2 dew this?), Soft Claws (maybe 2 ’spesive 4 mii), ore whut?

      • tessm says:

        ai trimz mai kittehs clause ebbery 2 wks or sew. yoo has to cut them frum the syde, nawt frum tawp, oar they will split. mai kittehs nebber skratch mee much (rilly onlee wuns when ai acksidentallee hurt wun of them). ef yoo don’t hurt or startle tehm, yoo prolly won’t git skrached, an if yoo keeps clause clipped they won’t bee overly pointy an won’t break skin sew eezily. start now when tehy iz yung sew tehy gits used to it! steroyds, do nawt want. :(

      • madamz says:

        I takes mi kittehs en rowls dem up inna blankie ur a towelz reel titely, thenz aih gentlee pullz owt one pawz at a tymes sew aih ken clip it carefulli widowt receiven de wrath ub da poyntee endz !!!!111!!! Nawt sew bad aktualli

      • onceajinx says:

        Mebbee yoo kin git dat pet nayl trimmer fing whut iz adbertizd on teebee… It lyke a Dremel rotaytin file wif a gard toprevent taykin too mush awf. Wunst kittehs gits yoostoo whuteber noyz it mayks, I bet it be gud…

        R just clip da tips ebree fyoo dayz… Kittehs will need a scratchee post eben moar cuz clippin mayks da sides split moar offen…

        I yoozd da big kinda nayl clipprs fur peepull awn ma kittehs, dey is cheeper an stay sharpurr lawngr dan da heyyoj pet clipprs…

  12. Romeow says:

    Fur awl dose hoos cares have bean our concern,
    teh work goes on, teh cause endures, teh hope still lives,
    and teh dweem shall neber die.

  13. Eve says:

    Luks moer liek Hitler-kitteh than Winston Churchlol-kitteh!

  14. SgtFlomingo says:

    DIS. EZ. CATDAH!!!!

  15. SgtFlomingo says:

    DIS. IS. CATDAH!

  16. sarahbear says:

    holy crud
    he looks like that one cat from the broadway musical/movie Cats

    he was my favorite guy kitty :D

  17. Sakee says:

    Wee shawl neva soorrendah! Wee shawl rool da wurld wif kewtness!

  18. Kitteh_Kat_Celia says:

    Do yew hear teh kittiehs sing? Singing teh song of angry hoomans?

    It is teh moosic of a kitteh who will nawt be slaves again!

    When teh beeting of yur heart, Echoes teh beeting of teh druums,

    There is a life about to start when Tomorrow Comes!

    • Les Meezerables ref, FTW!

      • Kitteh_Kat_Celia says:

        Tank u!

      • jamamakitty says:

        ohai LCB, ai cannut axxess yer linkie………..

          • jamamakitty says:

            teh wun we awl been makin blue

            Internet Explorer cannot display the webpage

            Most likely causes:
            You are not connected to the Internet.
            The website is encountering problems.
            There might be a typing error in the address.

            What you can try:
            Diagnose Connection Problems

            More information

            This problem can be caused by a variety of issues, including:

            Internet connectivity has been lost.
            The website is temporarily unavailable.
            The Domain Name Server (DNS) is not reachable.
            The Domain Name Server (DNS) does not have a listing for the website’s domain.
            If this is an HTTPS (secure) address, click Tools, click Internet Options, click Advanced, and check to be sure the SSL and TLS protocols are enabled under the security section.

            For offline users

            You can still view subscribed feeds and some recently viewed webpages.
            To view subscribed feeds

            Click the Favorites Center button , click Feeds, and then click the feed you want to view.

            To view recently visited webpages (might not work on all pages)

            Click Tools , and then click Work Offline.
            Click the Favorites Center button , click History, and then click the page you want to view.

          • jamamakitty says:

            teh wun we awl been makin blue dat goes to kthxbuy

            • Does u get a error message? I just tried and it werked 4 me. It better!

              Try this, it points to teh same place:

              http://www.hullcloth.com/store/

              • jamamakitty says:

                it says IE cannot display the webpage……. akshully ai wuz lukkin for yr profyl but wen ai gottid dis messig ai fort yew mite wants tew noes

                ai gots tew yer profyle on mai frens sew ai cud adds jch4k

                • Ok. I can open it in my IE. Also firefox. Whut version of IE does u use?

                  • jamamakitty says:

                    it’s the same one i’ve been using………. and i got there before. i just thought maybe with you setting up janet’s profile maybe something got honked up.

                  • madamz says:

                    Ur linkie is werkin jus fyne furr mii

                    • jamamakitty says:

                      mebbe jus mai puter….. inneresting

                      • madamz says:

                        Kan u get udder linkies tew werk? Mite try myne 2 C

                        • jamamakitty says:

                          yous be fyne……….dats wai ai wuz wundrin……. jus tryin tew helpz

                        • No, I preciate ur halps! That page is secure, which may be why someof u guise is havening a problem.

                          But I changed my name link to point to my profile, since there is a link thaere to KTHXBUY. I’m just trying to establish teh store since it’s so new. Rember: cheezfrenz get a 10% discount by using teh coopon code “CHZ”!

                        • jamamakitty says:

                          yay, dat’s beddur. ai noew yew wants axxess to yer stor so fort ai wud letz yew noes. yer “natural moves” is ok for old kittlets? mamakitty is habbin ol ladee prololms….. fud goes in….nawt want tew cum out…….sry tmi

                        • I honestly hasn’t tried it, but the things I have tried have all worked so well for me and my kittehs that I’m sure it is worth trying. There is a mummy-back guarantee. As long as teh bottle isn’t borked or totally empty, u can return it fup to a year later.

                        • Um, make that a “munny-back” guarantee. Stoopy wraparound.

                          For u it should be a mammy-back guarantee!

                        • jamamakitty says:

                          :lol: ai finkso ai will try it. herz haytes wen ai trais tew get dat tubular stuffs down her froat……… ai kin beez yer reviewer. poopable iz us!!!

                        • When Esme usedta take GlucoBalance befoar she went to injected insulin, she had — warning, tmi ahead — runny poops. They stopped when she stopped taking teh pills. Then I gived her Muscle and Joint Support for a while until I realized it was messing with her insulin. Runny poo again. Now she takes C-Caps and I mix it in wif her gushifuds. No runny poo! I figured it was something in teh capsules.

                          So u could try mixing it wif her fuds. OTOH, it sounds like runny poo is better than what ur getting now.

                        • Grrr. I is tired and shuldn’t be trying to express myself in riting.

                          It was teh capsules themselves, not teh medicines. Something in teh gelatin?

                        • jamamakitty says:

                          iz werf a try………… fanks fer teh warnin.

                          how high wuz her glucose? wen vet did teh bludwerk during her widdel crisis himz sed her glucose wuz pritty high…….but wanted tew wait till she finish her meds and check agin…………. fink it wuz 270 ish…… ai noes nuffin bout glucose lebels

                        • Aahz says:

                          “wraparound” — awn uh “mummy-bak” garontee? :lol: :lol: :lol: U sew funnee! :-D

                        • Esme was “off teh charts”. Stress is part of it, but over 200 is alarming. I did a curve on her last weekend (testing her bloods every 2 hours) and her first one before her morning shot was over 400! It came down after the insulins but I have have adjusted her dosage of insulin accordingly.

                        • Aahz says:

                          Ohai jamamakitty! Didja gitz plinnee uv sleapz lastist nyt? Haow iz mamakitty? Ifn U haz awlriddee givvin da riport awn anuvver fred, I b sorree, but I haznt keepted up awn awl da fredz 2dai…
                          {{{{jamamakitty n mamakitty}}}}

                        • Aahz, I swear that was unintentional. But puns follow me around like that. I sawr a tree the other day wif a bulge at teh base that looked like a big butt. I sayed to myself “too much junk in teh trunk!” and only after I thinked that thought did I realize that that was doubly apt.

                        • jamamakitty says:

                          Ohai Aahz……… fanks fer yr cuncernz!!! mamakitty beez berry muchly better!! gotz sum gud sleeps till her highness wanted tew talk in teh middle ob teh nite……. but wuz music tew mai eeers. herz nawt staggerin hardly tall!! but seh iz teh groggy frum teh meds an is sleepin lots…… not dat unusual for 18 yearz old kitteh!! herz bin purrin and movin teh front paws bak n forf…. muchly like normal……….. her had sooo much gud thots frum ebbrywun n ai noes dat helps!!!

                        • Aahz says:

                          Sumtymz da bestist punz r da wunz U nawt trie 2 mayk, but da wunz wat happinz awl bie demsevz… :-)

                          Sints U n jamamakitty r tawkin pet meds, wat b ur bestist idear 2 uhlimminayt (anuvver unintinshunul pun) hayrbawlz? I c U kerry Furball Dr., but itz nawt n ur “LCB Rekumminz” listee… BTW, I nawt tawkin jess gittin rid uv da hayrbawlz wuntz deys inna tummee, but 2 hep keapz dem frum foarmin inna nawt-sekkund plays. Mai Mithril haz da lawngist furz uv enny kitteh I ebber seen, n herz haz da moast horkz of enny kitteh I ebber seen 2. I haz tryded lawtsa fingz, but dey nawt werkz wif Mithril… :-( Fanky!

                        • Aahz says:

                          Datz gud 2 heer, jamamakitty!!1! Moovin pawz… U meen liek maykin biskitz? I hoapz evvyfing keapz awn gittin beddur 4 da liddul ol kitteh… :-)

                        • Teh LCB Recommends section is only for stuffs that I has actually used on me or on my kittehs and so can vouch for personally. I usedta has a long-haired Maine Coon kitteh who had major hairball issues, but he’s been gone for 10 years now. My current kittehs get combed daily and have not had much in the way of hairball troubles so i haven’t needed to try Furball Dr.

                          But as I told jamamakitty, I have been so well pleased with what I have tried that not only was I motivated to start selling the product line, but I think it well worth trying just about any of the products. The mummy is ur guarantee.

                        • jamamakitty says:

                          yesh, laik kneeding………. ai finkso herz is on da mend. nawt shur how old yer Mithril is but iffn herz ebber keep scratchin eers or tiltin head to teh side or starts staggerin around, rememberz dat cud be inner ear infections…….

                          ai am still recubbering frum teh panik ob dat nite……… ai internalizes dat kind ob stuff bad!!!

                        • Aahz says:

                          Mithril b 14 yeerz owld. Nawt kwyt 18 yeerz liek mamakitty, but steel nawt uh yung wippersnapper…

                          I dew brushiz herz, but sumwymz it seamz 2 me liek brushin maykz herz furbawlz werser, awlmoast az if da brushin lewsinz up da furz n den herz swallerz em win herz baffz… But uv cors ifn I doan brush herz, den herz fur mattz… **pleh**

                          I had uh frind wif uh Mayn Koon, but Mithrilz fur iz ebben lawngur dan dat, ifn U kin imajin…

                        • Aahz says:

                          sumwymz = sumtymz

                          I fink I neadz sum sleapz… ;-) Mai tiepin skilz win I sleapee — lemme show… ZZZZZZZZzzzzzz……

                      • nightshayde says:

                        Nawt just yers, jamamakitty. Itz nawt werkin on mai (werk) puter neever.
                        Owell. Aiz goin hoam nao ennywaiz.
                        Ebbreewun haz a saef, healfee, & fun lawng weekend (oar normal length weekend if yer nawt doin teh 4th uf Juleye sillybrashuns).

  19. aliceflynn says:

    An Churchill sayd 2, “We all b kittehs, but I b da GLOW-kitteh”.
    but is obsquirrel qwote.

  20. Kitteh_Kat_Celia says:

    *Er…make that

    Do yew hear teh kittiehs sing? Singing teh song of angry hoomans?
    It is teh moosic of a kitteh who will nawt be slaves again!
    When teh beeting of yur heart, Echoes teh beeting of teh druums,
    There is a life about to start when Caturday Comes!

  21. 55555 says:

    FURST!

  22. Jeff says:

    Teh Bwitis Bullcat Wises Again!

  23. DejaMew says:

    ai think ai maiy hab to steel dis kitteh four the TKO (tuksedo kitteh owtfit). ai hab branchd owt frum steelingk ownly frum somc. cheezpeeps, pls to be forgibbin me fur da eentrushun, but dis kitteh needz to bee awn de TKo syde. Himz jus tew kewyoot tu resist.

  24. two_kittehs says:

    Black n white kitteh sayz yes we can!

    • two_kittehs says:

      tuxie kittehs, calico kittehs, tabby kittehs, tortie kittehs we iz all kitteh
      we haz more in commonz wid each odders dan the color of our furz
      our time is now, to come togedder for deh common kitteh cauze
      and bring kittehs to back to their original plaze, where all kittehs shall
      has foreber homez and humins will worshipz them lyke they did
      in anshunt Egyptz

  25. Jack Deth says:

    “Marree~uhz… I juss
    metz gurrl Cat naymdz Marree~uh.
    She’z beez Toartee Shellz

    Andz she can haz casstz
    a spellz awwn meh. Marree~ uh!
    Green iiez mezzmurrize

    From t3h shaddoz wayr
    she lykez 2 hydez. Herz furr a
    wundurrfull dissgyze

    Az she luerz meh cloass.
    I can haz gibben up t3h goast
    4 mai Marree~uh!” :-)

    Jack:

    (Apawlojeez 2 ‘Wess Syde Stoaree)

  26. zauberflote says:

    testing testing testing fur abatar.

  27. Dawnne says:

    *aplodds*
    clapity clapity foar teh purrfekt speeech.

  28. Hashim says:

    very well said mah furry friend!!1!

  29. stillapill says:

    Bravehart kitteh needz blu face paintz.

  30. Animol says:

    braveheart kitteh

  31. fiendishrabbit says:

    Soon or late the day is coming,
    Tyrant Man shall be o’erthrown,
    And the fruitful fields of England
    Shall be trod by beasts alone.

  32. thesharicat says:

    Aw, this kitty looks like my old kitten Sasuke! Too cool if it is him

  33. onceajinx says:

    Wile yoo iz skratchin – kin yoo skratch mai bak? A liddle lower, tanx!

  34. jmuhj says:

    Sew…tihs teh UTHUHR Winston. Ryt?

  35. Tuxie Kitteh bemindes me ov Richard Burton, iyn wun ov hims sohlilokweez!!!!
    (Iyn fakt, Ai fink TK ebben luuks a liddel bit liek teh layte iylluhstreeuus Misture Burton.)

    Hmmm, jes fink; Richard Burton plaiying Winston Churchill!!!
    Sadlee, iyt nebber heppined; wutta shayme!!!! 2 rlly faymuus peeps, eech iyn tehir oawn paurtikulure fieldez!!!

  36. chuck-norris says:

    teh kitteh shal triumhp
    ova teh evil homans
    tehy wil neva surenda!!!

  37. Qasim says:

    kitteh overlord iz a natural leader

  38. josh says:

    der goes teh siren dat warns of teh air raids

  39. Grant says:

    Winston Churchill Cat FTW!



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