we shall scratch dem on teh sofas,

we shall scratch dem on teh sofas, we shall scratch dem in teh gardens, we shall nebur surrendur!
until we gits caught nd put in jayl.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: lobs2
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we shall scratch dem on teh sofas, we shall scratch dem in teh gardens, we shall nebur surrendur!
until we gits caught nd put in jayl.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: lobs2
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
We shall scratch dem everywhere!
Conga ratz onna nawt secund spot uv teh nawt-secund ty, ohah!!
O hai bunniwaz! Fanks. Iz mai sekkond nawt sekkond. Iz berry prowd!
I hadda reely nawt sekund nawt twice. Iz more den happee to be nawt-furst half of nawt-sekund!!! Wud joo like a mango margereeta?
I be haben a Katluah wif creem. Is homemade. Berry gud. *pores a shot into cordial glass and passes to bunniwaz*
NOMNOMNOM…iz berry gud, tanks!! Cheez!!
Nebbur, in da feeld ob kitteh lolling, haz sew mush beyn nommed bai sew menni. Dat’s sole stew.
I have a dreem,
tat wun day all teh black kittehs and all teh white kittehs and all the calico kittehs and tiger kittehs stand togetter, but not the orange kittehs becaus they are poysin.
this is da funniest photo ever
CHHAAARRRGGGEE!!!
We shall scratch them in a boat. We shall scratch them with a goat.
Mite wanna ax teh goat furst.
Aaahhh,Dr.Seuss……ai used to kno dat book by hart…nawt aneemore!
dats a qwote frum dr. seuss….sounds vulgar…
how do u turn vulgar into lolspeak?
We lurn bai dewin … n we dew it uh lawt rownd heer
Datz Y we can haz da Nottee Barn…
Oh Hai sarahbear. Wuz wunderz hoa owld u mite biii?
Do U members Dr. Seuss?
i’m a teenager….
i remember dr. seuss…
my favorite book by him was the fish book
WOn Fisch, too Fisch, red Fisch, bloo Fisch??
I red awl Dr. Suess books tew mi kidlets so much I had dem awl memrized !! Usta coold recyte dem awl
mi kidos cud tew !!
Lolgar? iz eezee
Seussifying Churchill…taht gibs me LOL!
Dr. Seuss mist cawling as speach riter.
Ai cud nawt, wud nawt nom dem heer or dere. Ai cud nawt nom dem anywere.
Ai du nawt wont green pegs and yam. Ai du nawt wont dem Sham Buys Yams.
Green XEgg Celent !!
F U N E X?
S, I F X.
F U N E M?
S, I F M.
OK, I L F M N X.
(desipher hint: Just pronouce each letter, and yoo will fynd teh sintexes. (sort of))
B S U R S U C S I M I M
N-Q. I F-N N-E X.
Ai has Steig buk CDB as kid. U 2? Tex mesajing wud gib Steig a happee, no?
Awesome !! Took mi a whyl to git der, but I did !!! tanks fur dat !!!
Wun fudz. Too fudz.
Red fudz. Bloo fudz.
Blak fudz. Bloo fudz.
Owld fudz. Noo fudz.
Meetz thing 1 en thing 2
Oh teh tings dat thayll do
hawp on pawp
stawp
du nawt hawp on pawp
go dawggie go
beeg dawg leetle dawg
red dawg bloo dawg
dew U liek mi hatz
I dew! I liekz dat pardee hat!!
Wat wur awl der thyngs “Lolcat wib a bat” nom in the chyldrun’s howse?
Appuls
Bananananas
Cheez
Downuts
Eggs (nawt green)
Fysh
G….
Green eggz n
Ham
Ise kreem
J…
Jamb,
koe-koe,
LUMpFisch Kaviar
Jelli
Kornflakes
Liquorice Allsorts
Marmalade (taken from Paddington Bear’s supply)
N….
Nutz (and bolts),
Oatmeal (and groats),
gravey (inna boat)
Nutz, Oatmeel, and POOR-Idge..,
no shame, yur jus gravy fixated, you too have a thing for that wonderful combination of lubricant, adhesive, explosive, and currency. you are not alone.
Quackerz wif a ewe
Rozez in a stew
Sodaz at teh zew
T…
Taim foar mee and yew?
Ur grandmas stew
Vresh vlesh u can cut frew
W…
Turnips
Urtica dioica
Veal steaks
Wolfberry
Xynotyro cheese
Yoghurt (organic)
Zongzi
——
Yay! Ai fownd reel fuuds four da reeeeeely hard letturs! An’ I ownli cheeted an’ luuked up sum ob them. Ok, all ob dem.
If they fail to cast their vote
We shall beat them with a stoat
now, that’z just way 2 raandumm.
I dunno, gettin flogged wit a rodent of unusual viciousness would probabably entice me to vote.
well, whutever it taykes….
R.O.U.S.’s?
nah, nawt neerly supple enough for a really good flogging.
’sydes, eye doan fink they rlly exhist.
RAWR!
RAWR!<3
Nebur surendur! Neber stahp! Alwais Furrrward! Alwais- AH SMELZ CATSNIP! *runs off stage*
*Hides teh catsnip* Do Not Want kitteh tyrats 2 blo teh subl kitteh ebil planz
Tehn u bettur hied teh can opiner 2.
Winston Churchlol kitteh will be sober in teh mornings but u will still be teh ugly.
Nebber in teh feeld of kitteh conflict, has so muches been nommed by so few.
I has nothing to offer but my bodily flooids. Not so grate, ackshually.
red cross iz always lookin fur a few gud pints
Red Cross can buy deir own beer, jus’ liek eberybodi else.
I cood yooz uh gud pynt rite bowt naow… Ginness, prefrublee…
Wutz teh colors uv teh Kittehland Flag??
Mebbe a nipleaf onna field uv gushifud?
Glitter and Clear.
Inbizibul n c-throo
pink to match da toezes, gween to match da eyes, and white to match da pointy-ends.
Green (for da paytrun saynt ob catnip), White (for ceeling cat, fish and rice), Red (for meat) and Brown (for canned gushifuud).
hm.. lets see list of colurz..
akwa
bloo
calico
dark bloo
e…
Ummm . . .
Ecru . . .
Foosha . . .
Gern . . .
H
Hoogely peeenk
Icky puce
Joocy n’oranj
K…
Key-lime green
Lavender
Mauve
N…
Nude
Ochre
Purkle
Q…
Quince (?)
Redwitenbloo
Silverer
T..
Taupe (zzzzz)
Um…..
WITE!!!!
X….
oopsie, violet, 2
Xray (we can’t see it)
YELLow
Zinfandel (iz also a NOM)
phew.
Ownly wiv teh superkitteh xray vizzion
Turkwize
Ultra-violet
Violet
Woad
Xtra dark murple
Yello, Mello
Zygon green
Kinky black Lethur
Lavundeer
Magenter
N…
Heliotrope
Ice bloo
jellybean kulur
Khaki
L…
Mebbe a slice uv red fer what happenin ifn teh pointee ens getcha?
i shall call him Tux
conga rat shoe laces!
hoo ar dese ratz who conga nd wy do dey hab shoo lazes?
*snert*
teh kitteh leedr speeks.
Lord John Whorfin Kitteh:
“Histree iz mayd at nyt!
Kerriktur iz wat U r inna dark!
We muss werk wyl da klok sheeza tikkin!!”
they mai take pointy ends but neber take our FREEDOM!!!
butz summtiems they taekz teh harblz. Sigh.
I noe itz considered Evil 2 declaw kittehs, but I am afrayd ov B N scrached by my too noo littel kittens. Becuz I haz lupus, an so my immune system is naught so grate, akshually. I can has infekshuns rlly Easelly, and, whenever I git poked ore scratched (like frum blackberry thorns), I get nasty bleedz under my skin, that mayke me look lyke I am inna slasher film. (that’s whut my son no. won, who was a film (FVS) major sed.) It’s a type of vasculitis, becuz my blood vessel R fagile or sumfing, and then I am supposed 2 tayke steroyd pills. N E way, my grey tabby, Dr. VIrjay, came 2 mii as a stray, declawed on awl fores!!! (pore fing), butt issa berry gutsy cat. Baby Brother and sister hav little needel clause—not 2 bad yet.
Whut’s teh best way 2 protect myself frum skratches? Trim teh clause (whut’s teh best way 2 dew this?), Soft Claws (maybe 2 ’spesive 4 mii), ore whut?
ai trimz mai kittehs clause ebbery 2 wks or sew. yoo has to cut them frum the syde, nawt frum tawp, oar they will split. mai kittehs nebber skratch mee much (rilly onlee wuns when ai acksidentallee hurt wun of them). ef yoo don’t hurt or startle tehm, yoo prolly won’t git skrached, an if yoo keeps clause clipped they won’t bee overly pointy an won’t break skin sew eezily. start now when tehy iz yung sew tehy gits used to it! steroyds, do nawt want.
I takes mi kittehs en rowls dem up inna blankie ur a towelz reel titely, thenz aih gentlee pullz owt one pawz at a tymes sew aih ken clip it carefulli widowt receiven de wrath ub da poyntee endz !!!!111!!! Nawt sew bad aktualli
Mebbee yoo kin git dat pet nayl trimmer fing whut iz adbertizd on teebee… It lyke a Dremel rotaytin file wif a gard toprevent taykin too mush awf. Wunst kittehs gits yoostoo whuteber noyz it mayks, I bet it be gud…
R just clip da tips ebree fyoo dayz… Kittehs will need a scratchee post eben moar cuz clippin mayks da sides split moar offen…
I yoozd da big kinda nayl clipprs fur peepull awn ma kittehs, dey is cheeper an stay sharpurr lawngr dan da heyyoj pet clipprs…
Fur awl dose hoos cares have bean our concern,
teh work goes on, teh cause endures, teh hope still lives,
and teh dweem shall neber die.
Luks moer liek Hitler-kitteh than Winston Churchlol-kitteh!
I doan beleeb I eber seed Kitler in a tuxeedo.
But kitteh has revurs-Hilter mustash and iz doin teh nawt-see saloot!
Yup, luk moar liek nawt-see saloot.
Kittehs need lawnger toze so tehy can maek Victree sine. Sad fackt of histree adn fizziology.
DIS. EZ. CATDAH!!!!
DIS. IS. CATDAH!
Tewnite wii dine in H3LL
Er mebe wii jus dine in Basement ??
holy crud
he looks like that one cat from the broadway musical/movie Cats
he was my favorite guy kitty
lulz
don’t take that out of context….
Wee shawl neva soorrendah! Wee shawl rool da wurld wif kewtness!
Do yew hear teh kittiehs sing? Singing teh song of angry hoomans?
It is teh moosic of a kitteh who will nawt be slaves again!
When teh beeting of yur heart, Echoes teh beeting of teh druums,
There is a life about to start when Tomorrow Comes!
Les Meezerables ref, FTW!
Tank u!
ohai LCB, ai cannut axxess yer linkie………..
Which one?
teh wun we awl been makin blue
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teh wun we awl been makin blue dat goes to kthxbuy
Does u get a error message? I just tried and it werked 4 me. It better!
Try this, it points to teh same place:
http://www.hullcloth.com/store/
it says IE cannot display the webpage……. akshully ai wuz lukkin for yr profyl but wen ai gottid dis messig ai fort yew mite wants tew noes
ai gots tew yer profyle on mai frens sew ai cud adds jch4k
Ok. I can open it in my IE. Also firefox. Whut version of IE does u use?
it’s the same one i’ve been using………. and i got there before. i just thought maybe with you setting up janet’s profile maybe something got honked up.
IE 7
Ur linkie is werkin jus fyne furr mii
mebbe jus mai puter….. inneresting
Kan u get udder linkies tew werk? Mite try myne 2 C
yous be fyne……….dats wai ai wuz wundrin……. jus tryin tew helpz
No, I preciate ur halps! That page is secure, which may be why someof u guise is havening a problem.
But I changed my name link to point to my profile, since there is a link thaere to KTHXBUY. I’m just trying to establish teh store since it’s so new. Rember: cheezfrenz get a 10% discount by using teh coopon code “CHZ”!
yay, dat’s beddur. ai noew yew wants axxess to yer stor so fort ai wud letz yew noes. yer “natural moves” is ok for old kittlets? mamakitty is habbin ol ladee prololms….. fud goes in….nawt want tew cum out…….sry tmi
I honestly hasn’t tried it, but the things I have tried have all worked so well for me and my kittehs that I’m sure it is worth trying. There is a mummy-back guarantee. As long as teh bottle isn’t borked or totally empty, u can return it fup to a year later.
Um, make that a “munny-back” guarantee. Stoopy wraparound.
For u it should be a mammy-back guarantee!
When Esme usedta take GlucoBalance befoar she went to injected insulin, she had — warning, tmi ahead — runny poops. They stopped when she stopped taking teh pills. Then I gived her Muscle and Joint Support for a while until I realized it was messing with her insulin. Runny poo again. Now she takes C-Caps and I mix it in wif her gushifuds. No runny poo! I figured it was something in teh capsules.
So u could try mixing it wif her fuds. OTOH, it sounds like runny poo is better than what ur getting now.
Grrr. I is tired and shuldn’t be trying to express myself in riting.
It was teh capsules themselves, not teh medicines. Something in teh gelatin?
iz werf a try………… fanks fer teh warnin.
how high wuz her glucose? wen vet did teh bludwerk during her widdel crisis himz sed her glucose wuz pritty high…….but wanted tew wait till she finish her meds and check agin…………. fink it wuz 270 ish…… ai noes nuffin bout glucose lebels
“wraparound” — awn uh “mummy-bak” garontee?
U sew funnee!
Esme was “off teh charts”. Stress is part of it, but over 200 is alarming. I did a curve on her last weekend (testing her bloods every 2 hours) and her first one before her morning shot was over 400! It came down after the insulins but I have have adjusted her dosage of insulin accordingly.
Ohai jamamakitty! Didja gitz plinnee uv sleapz lastist nyt? Haow iz mamakitty? Ifn U haz awlriddee givvin da riport awn anuvver fred, I b sorree, but I haznt keepted up awn awl da fredz 2dai…
{{{{jamamakitty n mamakitty}}}}
Aahz, I swear that was unintentional. But puns follow me around like that. I sawr a tree the other day wif a bulge at teh base that looked like a big butt. I sayed to myself “too much junk in teh trunk!” and only after I thinked that thought did I realize that that was doubly apt.
Ohai Aahz……… fanks fer yr cuncernz!!! mamakitty beez berry muchly better!! gotz sum gud sleeps till her highness wanted tew talk in teh middle ob teh nite……. but wuz music tew mai eeers. herz nawt staggerin hardly tall!! but seh iz teh groggy frum teh meds an is sleepin lots…… not dat unusual for 18 yearz old kitteh!! herz bin purrin and movin teh front paws bak n forf…. muchly like normal……….. her had sooo much gud thots frum ebbrywun n ai noes dat helps!!!
Sumtymz da bestist punz r da wunz U nawt trie 2 mayk, but da wunz wat happinz awl bie demsevz…
Fanky!
…
Sints U n jamamakitty r tawkin pet meds, wat b ur bestist idear 2 uhlimminayt (anuvver unintinshunul pun) hayrbawlz? I c U kerry Furball Dr., but itz nawt n ur “LCB Rekumminz” listee… BTW, I nawt tawkin jess gittin rid uv da hayrbawlz wuntz deys inna tummee, but 2 hep keapz dem frum foarmin inna nawt-sekkund plays. Mai Mithril haz da lawngist furz uv enny kitteh I ebber seen, n herz haz da moast horkz of enny kitteh I ebber seen 2. I haz tryded lawtsa fingz, but dey nawt werkz wif Mithril…
Datz gud 2 heer, jamamakitty!!1! Moovin pawz… U meen liek maykin biskitz? I hoapz evvyfing keapz awn gittin beddur 4 da liddul ol kitteh…
Teh LCB Recommends section is only for stuffs that I has actually used on me or on my kittehs and so can vouch for personally. I usedta has a long-haired Maine Coon kitteh who had major hairball issues, but he’s been gone for 10 years now. My current kittehs get combed daily and have not had much in the way of hairball troubles so i haven’t needed to try Furball Dr.
But as I told jamamakitty, I have been so well pleased with what I have tried that not only was I motivated to start selling the product line, but I think it well worth trying just about any of the products. The mummy is ur guarantee.
yesh, laik kneeding………. ai finkso herz is on da mend. nawt shur how old yer Mithril is but iffn herz ebber keep scratchin eers or tiltin head to teh side or starts staggerin around, rememberz dat cud be inner ear infections…….
ai am still recubbering frum teh panik ob dat nite……… ai internalizes dat kind ob stuff bad!!!
Mithril b 14 yeerz owld. Nawt kwyt 18 yeerz liek mamakitty, but steel nawt uh yung wippersnapper…
…
I dew brushiz herz, but sumwymz it seamz 2 me liek brushin maykz herz furbawlz werser, awlmoast az if da brushin lewsinz up da furz n den herz swallerz em win herz baffz… But uv cors ifn I doan brush herz, den herz fur mattz… **pleh**
…
I had uh frind wif uh Mayn Koon, but Mithrilz fur iz ebben lawngur dan dat, ifn U kin imajin…
sumwymz = sumtymz
Mai tiepin skilz win I sleapee — lemme show… ZZZZZZZZzzzzzz……
…
I fink I neadz sum sleapz…
Nawt just yers, jamamakitty. Itz nawt werkin on mai (werk) puter neever.
Owell. Aiz goin hoam nao ennywaiz.
Ebbreewun haz a saef, healfee, & fun lawng weekend (oar normal length weekend if yer nawt doin teh 4th uf Juleye sillybrashuns).
yew be safe tew, NS……. njoi weekendz
An saim tew U Nightshayde . . . Happitale 4thz !!!11!
Hopes U hav Fyrewerks !!
An Churchill sayd 2, “We all b kittehs, but I b da GLOW-kitteh”.
but is obsquirrel qwote.
nawt sew obsquirrel! ai knoes it!
(duz that mayk mee obsquirrel??)
den we bee obsquirrels 2gebber!!
(an mebbee glow-kittehs, 2!!1)
ai can bees glitteh kitteh? ai lurbs sparkly fings.
*Er…make that
Do yew hear teh kittiehs sing? Singing teh song of angry hoomans?
It is teh moosic of a kitteh who will nawt be slaves again!
When teh beeting of yur heart, Echoes teh beeting of teh druums,
There is a life about to start when Caturday Comes!
Aginz, FTW !!
Friidum! Deklarashun of Scratchipenduns!
FURST!
Gib oar taek an howr an a half.
Tanks furr mah furst good laff ub teh eveneeng.
haf U had N E badd laffz? Boowaaah, ha, ha!!!!
Epic FAIL
lulz
Iffen dey’re gowing tu fayl, dey may az well fayl in styel.
phail.
epic fail! nao u can has beetings from basement cat. no cheezburgers
Basement Cat haz cat toyz dat aren’t reely dere. When bad kittehs pownce on dem, dey vanish!Basement cat alsew haz Cerberus, a tree-hedded goggie dat bad kittehs aer playd wib by.
Teh Bwitis Bullcat Wises Again!
ai think ai maiy hab to steel dis kitteh four the TKO (tuksedo kitteh owtfit). ai hab branchd owt frum steelingk ownly frum somc. cheezpeeps, pls to be forgibbin me fur da eentrushun, but dis kitteh needz to bee awn de TKo syde. Himz jus tew kewyoot tu resist.
Black n white kitteh sayz yes we can!
tuxie kittehs, calico kittehs, tabby kittehs, tortie kittehs we iz all kitteh
we haz more in commonz wid each odders dan the color of our furz
our time is now, to come togedder for deh common kitteh cauze
and bring kittehs to back to their original plaze, where all kittehs shall
has foreber homez and humins will worshipz them lyke they did
in anshunt Egyptz
**(Sounds of floofy paws clappin wildly)**
*getzin on teh floofy paw clappin*
“Marree~uhz… I juss
metz gurrl Cat naymdz Marree~uh.
She’z beez Toartee Shellz
Andz she can haz casstz
a spellz awwn meh. Marree~ uh!
Green iiez mezzmurrize
From t3h shaddoz wayr
she lykez 2 hydez. Herz furr a
wundurrfull dissgyze
Az she luerz meh cloass.
I can haz gibben up t3h goast
4 mai Marree~uh!”
Jack:
(Apawlojeez 2 ‘Wess Syde Stoaree)
wyld floofy paws aplaws, en waven happitalez !!!1!! Brilly Ant !!
Datz wun uv ur bestist yet, Jak!!1! Elebentee cheezburgerz 4 U!!
so romantic…luvlee…Jack…
toarteez…ai had a toartishale…
wuz teh saweetist kitteh…came tu
us on a rainy nite…lukkin pitiful..
calld hur pitykitty..wuz a grate
momma tew…
Jack, weez gunna puttez yuu awn Braowdwaiy wif yuur oawn showe, yett!!!!!
testing testing testing fur abatar.
Sew sarry . . . Fail ?
I can halps mebe . . . r U syned on tew werdpress?
*aplodds*
clapity clapity foar teh purrfekt speeech.
very well said mah furry friend!!1!
Bravehart kitteh needz blu face paintz.
woad
braveheart kitteh
Soon or late the day is coming,
Tyrant Man shall be o’erthrown,
And the fruitful fields of England
Shall be trod by beasts alone.
Ai lukz forwurrd tew taht fyn daii!
Aw, this kitty looks like my old kitten Sasuke! Too cool if it is him
Wile yoo iz skratchin – kin yoo skratch mai bak? A liddle lower, tanx!
Sew…tihs teh UTHUHR Winston. Ryt?
Tuxie Kitteh bemindes me ov Richard Burton, iyn wun ov hims sohlilokweez!!!!
(Iyn fakt, Ai fink TK ebben luuks a liddel bit liek teh layte iylluhstreeuus Misture Burton.)
Hmmm, jes fink; Richard Burton plaiying Winston Churchill!!!
Sadlee, iyt nebber heppined; wutta shayme!!!! 2 rlly faymuus peeps, eech iyn tehir oawn paurtikulure fieldez!!!
teh kitteh shal triumhp
ova teh evil homans
tehy wil neva surenda!!!
kitteh overlord iz a natural leader
der goes teh siren dat warns of teh air raids
Winston Churchill Cat FTW!