Click to see All Kittehs | Captions Only | Videos Only
« Previous Her eyes not down here. | Cat Graph From Our Sister Site, GraphJam Next »
No can talk. In time-out. Stoopid hoomans. Couch looks better on fire.
if onlee itty bitty kitty fire brigade got dere in tiem 2 saf da couch.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: mastethom
Cheezburger Company Blog
I Has A Hotdog - Loldogs n Cute Puppies 
Just Capshunz - All of the Internet. Captioned
Animal Videos - Cute and Hilarious Animal Videos
Animal Gifs - Cute and Hilarious Animal Gifs
Daily Squee - So cute your brain might explode. 
Historic LOLs - Captioned Portraits of Yore
My Food Looks Funny - Funny Food Photos
So Much Pun - Visual Puns and Jokes
ROFLrazzi - Lol Celebs and All That's Fab Funny in Showbiz 
Totally Looks Like - Stuff That Looks Like Other Stuff
Must Have Cute - See. Want. Must Have!
If Style Could Kill - OMG Style!
Sumbunny gave teh kitteh wun ov mai Zippos!
Wish I cudda ben tehre…
Congratshoelaces on yer nawt sekkund, Maus! Whut drink an dans yu wunt?
How ’bout flaming shots and eberybunny duz “Jack be nimble”… wif a lieted candel
Flamin root beer shooters and Jack be Nimbly followed by a rowsing game ov Maustrap?
*akkseptz flaming shot. Blowz it owt. Downz it in wun swig.*
.
I luvs deh fun danssez
*Getz reddy fer deh cannulstikk dans: *
*cannul in wun hand, matches in tother.*
Jack b nimbul *Dansez owt n setz cannul in middul uv floor*
Jack b kwikk *danses rownd deh cannul n strikez match*
Jack jump ober *litez candul and dansez bak awayz*
Teh cannul stick. *Run, run, Jump*
*dansez away*
Um… MJ? Yer skirt is on fyre…
KWIK! KAWL TEH FYURMINZ!
mai trayd mark krai
Oh, wait! I fergotted!
*Gets out seltzer bottle*
*SpraySpraySpraySpraySpray*
Luks liek teh fyre is owt.
Yoo OK nao, MJ?
R u shure that was seltzer water Maus?
I think u grabbed the the rooty beer shooter stuff-
**MJ’s skirt goes *POOF* **
I didn’t like dat dress ennyhow.
duz yu wunt tew go tew teh NB tew git a wun freshly irined bai teh YNG?
Ai’ll accump… akkomp… go with you.
Ai kant go tu nawty barn. Woz band koz ai’m nawt nawty enuf.
Stik wif us for awile, jd…we’ll lern yu !! w00t!
I suspect hee is an expurt.
hey MJ… u haz nice legs!
Must be all the dansing that keeps them in shaype?
corse I is no aerobicks instructor so thats nawt a professhunal opinyon…
Fankz! I tryz to keep in shape. Mai shape b mostlee rownd.
♫♫♫
“One of the gals was fat and pink and pretty,
As round above as she was round below.”
♫♫♫
rownd IS a shaype!
And prolly helps wif the bubblol aerodymanicks, rite?
I could swear that she was padded
From her shoulder to her heel, ♫♫♫
ARG…!!!
I has an EERWURM now!
♫♫♫
“But later in the second act when she began to peel…”
♫♫♫
*Aside*
Bad sunburn?
♫♫♫ The corn is as high as an elolophant’s eyeeee……
Wait… Whut?
I wuz callin u corny.
But I fink I picked teh rong werd.
Well… I hoep yer eerwerm works it’s way outta yer brayn…
I has to go. TTFN!
He’s gone about as fur as he can go!!
She proved that everything she had was absolutely real!
She went about as fur as she could go, yes, sir!
She went about as fur as she could go.
*it had 2 b u*
I lurvz lukkin n2 ur ayz…
…dat bloo wun…dat green wun…
…dat red wun…
*it had 2 b u*
I lurvz ur figger…
…its lyk uh rekurd playr…
…33-45-78…
*it had 2 b u*
:snert:
oo MJ… I fink u gotted singed, just a littul but there.
OW,OW,OW!! my butt gotted singed!
N-stid uv dress, u naow can haz hot-pantz…
*dukz frum da flung mayturz*
LOL! Maus!! Ar yoo. . .refurring purrhaps to. . .
Jack be nimbul
GREAT BALLS OF FYR!
Jack be quik
Jack jump ober teh candelstick!
Wuz vereee funnee wehn ai wuz in collej! *snert*
:snerk:
YAY!! Maus! U awlwais deh kwikkest wif deh bestest!
Kwik! kawl deh fyre peepz!
*hands cweenmj a duzen boxes of marshmallow peepz. Will deez do?
Aren’t de fyre peepz in da NB ironing?
Maus!
HOO cud have taken wun of ur Zippos???
HOOOOO??????
I duznt know. But her inishuls is proly LCB…
Doan fink sew..? am nawt 2dai hur dai 4 teh payntin classiz 4 teh blynd kidletz oar teh operuh skool 4 teh def??/
sheza rele benny faktury huh?
brb. dey stolend mai abatar agen.
leezt yew noe eet wuzzunt LCB!!!
she wunt stele mai abatar. Iz nawt shiny enuf nd wunt jump intu hur pokitz newaiz. Rele kitteh ub abatar wud jump awn hur lap sap . oh, heerz anuvvur wun awn main. she fawt ai wurnt paing a10shen.
kitteh doin grate imitashun uv my 4 yr old nefew.
Alwais in the nawty chair….
Ohhh, gud reezon tu cawl da firemenz!!!
Wait… whut? Yoo guizes needs a reesun?
Iffen dey juss cawled indiscriminaletlee, den it bee lyke da boi dat cawled wulf. An de fyremenz nebber no wen wii rilli needz dem, or wen wii jus wanna luk on dem. Sew wii haz tu haz gud reezon tu cawl dem. An scarfacing wun cowch doan seem tu mush tu ask.
Hmmm…haz n e wun seen da boi dat cawled wulf? Izz hee coot?
doan noe bowt kyoot – but him danziz well!!
*teeny, tiny headdesk*
*head-plink*
yez, not a thud addawl.
moar Leica plink!!!
(((Oh Hai JAMamaKitty!!)))
Haev nawt bin tew Yahoo laytlee… wii goan tew Yakima suen?
sounz like ebbrywun is up 4 it………. just needs to firm up teh date
july 26/27? sumwun finded a nice hotlol dat luks naise …….. we needs tew find out wut teh chekin time is…….
i’m goin tew orygun on teh 20f of june tew has teh O Hai Desert Tea w/CweenMJ
luks like sum fun cheezpeep meetins
Sownz liek funz tu be had. Hoaw menny yu fink wil cum? nd hoo? Shud be gud wevvur den tu.
teh eastern washington ICHC get together iz about 5 peeps, ai fink. SMOM, Altosinger, Panther n Pam teh Kiwican, ai hopes ai’m not fergettin innywun.
will be fun!
Yew furr gottid YEW!!!
Iz teh hotlol menshunned awn teh Yahoo fred? Ai’ll trii to uze soem ob mai baink points furr teh room.
(Haz pool, plz, yez? must haev kidlet distraction sew wii can axulallee twk!)
http://www.oxfordin nyakima.com
yesh, hassa pool
http://www.oxfordin nyakima.com/
http://www.oxfordinnyakima.com/
Iffn itz nawt hawtter dan helf rekwires! At leest itz teh drai heet! Ai’m reely lukkin foarwurd tew itt!! Lass weakind ob Jool-eye bee teh fyne foar mee—Mr. A. S. duzzn’t unnerstan it, butt he’z otai wif it.
O hai AltoSinger!!
Ai’m gettN egg cited tew. Wheel bii nyce riiward foar gettN moevd an puttin awl taht stuf awae [agin].
Wow! Iz ennybuddy eltz juss a wee bitt nerbous? Iz a habbit frumwen ai wuz a kidlet an awlwais sed oar did teh rong fing…but ai’m gladd tew meet peeples fayse tew fayse!
a littil nerbous, but onlee cauz Ai’ll haev mai kidlets…
moment thx tew them.
Ai am shur Ai wheel haev @liizt wun
Am uzed tew miiting n00 peeps frum teh psy ants commu knitty. Tihs wheel bii moar riilaxt. (Haev put mai fut en mai mouf manee a tyme.)
Fankz, SMOM.
Ai fink wee shud eech taek a kidlet an dew sumfing lyke freaten tew kiss dem inn frunt ob dere frenz iff dey akt up…mai deelins wif 10-yeer-ole bois, let me sho yoo it!
yesh, AS, jus a lil nerbus………… ebbryting wheel be fine!!
teh hotlol iz gorejuss!!
Shud Ai goe hed n riiserb mai ruum?
(Ai wheel ask tihs ob yew onna fewchur fred, tew Juzt In Caze)
ai jus cawled an teh chek in time is 3:00 PM……… sew aim nawt shur iffn dats late for teh kittlens to injoy der day.
ai also fott dat ai mite cawl an see if der is a “group” rate, since der will be 4 rooms rented……..ai’m assuming. an den mebbee dey let us chek in early.
ai dint laik teh sound ob teh guy who answered phone……. sew ai will cawl tomorrow an talk to teh lady group manager…….. onlee can says no….
Teh ironic cowch finally meets itz DOOM!
Dont worree. Tehre’s plehnty uvvers to taek its playce…
hoomans ruin all teh funs.
Eany 1 be stupid to punish kute kitteh.
Powty bebbeh kitteh is powtin.
(Warneeng – HUGACIOUS splot alert!)
Cowch desurvd it. It nommd mah frenz. Revenj…I has it.
eet nommd awl a mai chaynj 2!! nao howz eye gonna git rekom pence???
How menne is a rekom?
eye rekom eet shud B an awful lawt!!
Haow du yu mend it?
deer jorjee, deer jorjee
damn dat hole in mai bukkit!!!
Trai sqweezing owt teh 100p towl.
hai DK!
when does u leeve on ur trip?
will u be able to check in here at all?
ohai leeza! Ai leeves errlee FreidEgg morning. Donut noe ifn ai’ll haz aksess to teh innertubes. Ai’ll shur miss y’all!
did yew haev a happee birfdae?
Tidmums nawt arownd,iz she???
Iffin u can sees any kitteh belleh,she goes cwazy.
Shii will git tew snorgle ett tewnite… aftr teh tour ob Bristle horse spittle.
wich miirindz mii, PB2K iz d00N teh owchpashunt there a pea tew dae.
(((HoepN yew feel bedder faztr tihz tiem, Luv)))
Ir heer nao
……….Sssssspppppllllllooooooooorrrrr………
Ohai, TM yu wuz bieng tokked abowt wile yu wuz owt ub da rume. At leest nobunny sez fingz abowt yu liek LCB Haow yu manij tu tipe wif kitteh awn lap? Ai gawt Kinsey naow.
Tidmum!! Gudness – awl dose brayneses awl obber teh plaic.
*sweep swepp sweepitee*
*skoop skoopitee skoop*
*tuk tuk n pat pat pat* Dere, awl smoov nao.
*rummij rummij inna CCC*
Oooh, a byootimus lilac 50′s bavving cap wif lallow flowers!
*tug tug n snaaAAPPPP! awn tite*
*sum extra duck taype juss in caes – rrriiiiiipppppp adn taype rown n rown*
Nao ai tuk dis sawft plad blankee arownd u, adn heer’s a chokklit martoonie adn sum chokklit possums *slips a few in her own pokkit fur later*
U feline bedder nao?
Wowzerz 4.5 kittehs!!
Dat feels mush bedderer!!
I jess carnt hep feeline awl splorty an skwee wen I seez dem kitteh bellehs!!!
Is teh bestest ferapee EBBER!!-but mah pore ole branses be awl a scramble awlla tyme!!
oooooooo
aiweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
pinkee pinkee toe pads – dans dans dans
also teh lovely arrangements uv teh fronties pawsies
tank cc ai has mai luvvly 50s baffin cap wit
teh extra duck taped strap
such a fashion statement at werk!
ai lubbs teh tuxie kittehs!!
um make taht skweeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
ai smashed too of mai pointy enz in a garage dore las weak ans hard to tippety typeddy.
Ai iz ’bout almosted to teh splort stage with tem feetzez on teh bebbeh kitteh. Ai wanna snorgle it and kiss it and wuv it and lerves it an’ Ai doan caerz about teh prubbable pointee endz dat would most liekedly taek mah faice orf and *SPLORT*
*passes out from teh cyootness factor of bebbeh footies on teh kitteh*
Uh,oh……
Here comes teh CCC….
***scrape,scrape,scrape***
*** pat,pat,pat ***
***taype,taype,taype**
Here is a soft pink blankee an sum choklitt kitteh feets.
Tayke it eezy,nao!
Oh, thankee fer teh carez. Eeckthecat. Ai uhpreeshiatesez it.
*nom, nom, nom*
*Internal monologue* Ai did not speks teh choklitt kitteh feetzez to be sew taistee!
I iz wid yu, SisTB – I lurves teh littul pattie paws, speshully teh pinkee wuns. But I swoons for all kines or kittehtoes – mah meezer pats mah fase wid his littul coco-toes and I becumns his slave.
An he noes it, tu…
Oh yesh, teh cool little coco-toes of teh meezers!!
Mai 4 bebbehs haz got….
Coco toes…
Freckle toes….
Pinky toes…
& black & white toes.
Itz a Toe Extravaganza !!!
Mah singular bebbeh has teh tortoiseshell toezez and pointee enz. Dey is differnt colors. Teh pointee enz is bof amber and clear.
Ah needz ter trim dem, but ai iz not to be trusted affer chaisen’ her wound de hous fer to go to teh bad playce. Ai hads ter cancel.
Yikes!! Ai haz had teh chasin but haz nebber had to cancel….almos,tho!!
Ai haz nebber tried to trim teh pointy endz….ai lieks mai skin too much !!
An dat’s eggzackly whai Ai trims dem. Ai laik mai skin. Ai’m ackshully allergic to kittehs and Ai gets teh great honking hibes where dey has just barely ticked mah skin. Deh hibes, tey itch monstrously fer hours and hours, eben wif teh anti-itch creems.
***bows to StB*****
U is berrry brave & a great kitteh lubber….to haz allergies & styll hav kittehs is a big sacri…sacra….big deel!
Ai counts maiself as a stoopid hed what lurves teh aminals more dan mai own helth. Iz OK.
I gets teh asthma an teh slitty, poufee eyes, and teh elebbenty billion sneezes and teh hibes an it’s all good, IMO. I lurves teh kittehs. So long as I wash mah faice an hands, Ai’m OK.
Heer chaise endz wif hide unnur da bed rest ub da dai wile ai getz nekzt tu last aidz fur bluddy armz nd wuteber els wuz ekzpozed. nd cancel appt.
We had teh Bubba Kitty an he was very sneekee. Ai learned haow to apply teh yard stich joodishusly to teh under deh bed and floosh him aout.
Teh current noo kitteh Ai has onlee had two weeks. Ai even putted on teh bell an everyting and she esscaped down teh rabbit hole. Ai couldn’t find her until teh bad place closed for teh day. Of course.
We has kitteh frum Norf Carlolina hoo has teh blak toe pads. We calls her our Tar Heel Kitteh. She bees 21 yeers old naow.
Bofe our otter kittehs be oranj tabby bois wif teh pinkee toe pads.
I forgotted to menshun dat it taeks free uv us to “manicure” teh yungest kitteh. Teh otter two I can do maiselfs, but teh “bebbeh” is berry strong 14-lb. barn cat hoo donut liek teh nayl clipperses.
ai dunt deeserve tew beez in tym owt! awl ai did wuz
Ate teh goldfish
Bit teh goggie
Carved a heart in teh furniture
D…
Defayced teh fugly couch
Eeted teh cheezburgers
Flouted convenshun
Gotted in trubble….
Hid teh cookies….
Ironed teh goggie…
J…
Jumpd on teh plants
Kiked durt on teh sidewawk
Likked teh buttur
M…
maded rainbows in teh plant
nibbled on teh mama feetses
opened teh cabinet wit teh gushi fuds init
p………..
Mizchief eye maed it!!
Nommd 2 kwik n hawkt…..
Oburtippt teh plant pawtz
P’d in teh durt frum teh plant pawtz..
Q…
Quitted moosik lessuns too soon
Ripped teh TP
Swatted teh next door kitteh
tole teh goggie eet wuz owkay – yude red dat apypur!!
Udnermynd yur (suppowsid) awforutee
Verree neerly sit fyer 2 teh draypz 2!!
Worturd teh plantz – mai wai!!
Xitid teh seen ov teh crym!!!
Y yew wanna noe??
…..
Zoomd arown liek teh Mad fing wif itz tayul awn fyur – B cawz mai tayul wuz awn fyur!!!!
YAYZ! ai starteded a kumplete list!1!1!1!
Yay 4 yew, Werdy !!!
wii du lub owur liszts!!
Iz whut happinz win yew burn teh cowtch.
Zigg-zagged froo awll teh roomz
mauled teh potted plant
nommed teh muffin tawps
pruned the flower arrangement
gouged the dresser top
horked up on hunnert doller towel
investigated the string hanging from sweater
kant ebbun do alfa bet!
O= oderiferryed teh rug
Eberybuddy sing: Teh sofa, teh sofa, teh sofa’s on fyre!
Almost mayks yoo wish fur a (wet) hunnert-doller towel to put on it! Hmph!
But sadlee, I duzzint HAZ no hunner-doller towel. Still in teh evvydense lokker, wun presumes, frum taht sad okkayshun when kittehlurve’s mommy got arrestikayted fur teh ALLEGED bath in teh orkestrer pit!
Teh sofa are on fyre? Oh noes!
I can has exguin…extig…fyre-putty-owt thingy?
I am the heaven
I am the water
Ich bin der Dreck unter deinen Walzen
(Oh no, whip it on me, honey!)
Ich bin dein geheimer Schmutz
Und verlorenes Metallgeld
(Metallgeld)
Ich bin deine Ritze
Ich bin deine Ritze und Schlitze
I am the clouds
I am embroidered
Ich bin der Autor aller Felgen
Und Damast Paspeln
Ich bin der Chrome Dinette
Ich bin der Chrome Dinette
Ich bin Eier aller Arten
Ich bin alle Tage und Nachte
Ich bin alle Tage und Nachte
Ich bin hier (AIEE-AH!)
Und du bist mein Sofa
Ich bin hier (AIEE-AH!)
Und du bist mein Sofa
Ich bin hier (AIEE-AH!)
Und du bist mein Sofa
Poor Frank…. Ai didn’t noe bout teh Chrome Dinette.
ai fink we hadz wun wen ai wuz liddel………. wit teh formika tawp
foar awl teh Formica Aunts tew run rownd awn!!
Zappa! Yaaay Gibbo!
Hai Maus
eye diddun powzt teh lawng vershun as eet am fulla teh nawtee wurdz een jurmun!!!
Aaaaan hao doo yoo know awl ov these nawtee jurmun wurdz??????
(tu tha tune of london’s burning)
Sofa’s burning
Sofa’s burning
Call the kittehs
Call the kittehs
Frier, frier!
Frier, frier!
Goggie burgers!
Goggie burgers!
Ai fawt LCB hab da towl cuz ai akzed hur wair she shawpz( a fyew munfz ago b4 ai nu hur berry wel):lol:
Why dey pikkin on me? Evree kitteh is nawty when nobudy’s lukkin.
Cause yoo disobayed the Elebenth Commandmunt: Dont Get Cawt…
Uh-oh. Kitteh whut can use maches can opn doorz n werk can opner. We is doomd.
Dats a gud poynt!
The kitteh needs an acomplise. Cannot light zippo wifowt ‘posable thumbs!
Kitteh noe needs ‘posable thums, has telekittesis. Burnz with de eze.
Hmmmm – hoo mite taht be, ai wunder???
well… eethur sumwon wif experiense using a zippo…. or.. sumwon wif a grudge against teh fugly cowch? Or bof??
It wuz Mungojerrie n Rumpleteazer…
an therz nuffin at awl to be dun abowt dat!
Qwoted cusses on weather.
Rolled down all the paper on the funny roll in the tiled room.
Sampled all the stuff for the hoomin dinner.
T
Is ok, kitteh. Bememember…♫ ebbry heero wuz wuns, ebbry villun wuz wuns, jus a boi wit a bad cattitooood ♫
Oh, the poor, poor pussycat.
CC noes, wii havs a hyyyuuuuuuujj stawk pyle ub uglii sofas hear at ICHCB N need ub BN bernd. Sumbuddy gib taht kitteh a meddle.
OK Tuxie kitteh, weez knoes iyts a rlly fugglee cowch, butt taht duz nawt xcuuse yuu frum tryeing tuu tourch iyt!! Taht rlly deserbed a tiem-aowt;
Wel, yuur hyuoomin mite maike yuu sittez tehre foar awhil adn fink bowt treiyng tuu bees a guud kitteh (at leest foar teh reyst ov teh day)
ROFL
I haz uh powt…
…pleez 2 joyn mai pittee partee
Warm sofa cushun…
YR DOING IT RONG
Cute feet!!! awwww!
This is one of my all time favorites – this one and the “fell off my chair again” one make me laugh like a loon.
it hoomans fault… dey shood nawt leave zippo out on table…
funny
Ow it’s so cute! she looks like my cat jewel
iLol’d =D
But I r sick of teh voice clips. Dey r mostly jst the capshun re-red =( Sooo boring!
We r alredy red capshun! Do not want again!
OMG! I laughed my head off when I read this! so far on this website, yours is my fave! LOVED it! Keep writing funnies like those!
bwaaahhhhha
couch will i-skratch later
dis wuz ma reaction: 7uuy777777777 u65
teeeest again…..
http://www.//mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=2437837
ohh is sooo kyoot!!!!!!!!! poor leetle kitteh hes soo misunderstood. ugly couch… must die!!!!!! hes a leetle interior decorator nao.
Lol thats soooo cute! it reminds me on my naughty kitten!! he looks very similer and he is always in time out
omg <3
Wao! Dis b reelie long kahmint thredd! lol
OMG That’s My Cat It Looks Like Her And Acts Like Her
LOL that be so funneh