« Previous I BEELEV U HAS | I caughted a mowse Next »
» 145 Comments
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
« Previous I BEELEV U HAS | I caughted a mowse Next »
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.

YOO ARE SAKKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh, Hai, Tidmum!!
*smilez hopefully*
Did u finding ur eering yet?
Deed joo chek LCB’s pokits? Shynee fings seem tew ends up deer lawts…jus sain…
Noe.

I ringed teh pubs an ask dem tew chek. I spekt sumone seed it an thot “OOOHHH SHINEY”……
Fanks fer askin cweenmj.
.
Howsumebber- I did find owt dat I wuz a liddle bit dwunk an walked twice as mennee steps as Mr T.M. did tew get home
Wuz a gud nyte owt tho
Az loong az u wuz jus a widdul bit dwunk. tew muchez dwunk, not so gud. Awlla dem eggstree stepz cowntz az eggzersize, rite?
uh-oh. I b thinking mai smilee b a liddul bit dwunk — hez lukkin kinda green.
I felted lyke dat yesstidy afternune

Yah.Dats rite.Extry eggsercize.Dats whut I did. Nope.Nawt dwunk.Nebber.!!!!
U needs to luk for somewun wiv wun eer, Tidmum. Udderwise, why wud dey want to keep wun eerring?
I for one have only one ear pierced (granted 3 times) so were it not for the fact of 3K+ mile separation I could be suspect.
Mmmmhummmm. Dat old “free fowsand miles away” exkews. Ai fink we needs to take u in for queschuning!
Wut is teh capital of Bollyveeyah?
How menny roads must a man walk down?
ummmm. Mt. Mckinnely?
Huh. Darn. OK u is free to go, just watch teh stairs awn teh way owt, dey can be a bit slippry… oops, fird wun dis week. No srsly, sarge, he just tripped!
yeah fell down four flights of stairs.
in a two story building.
It’s teh darndest fing. Happns awl teh time.
Uh, seein as ur still heer – u wants to cormfess NEfing?
nope, nawt reeely.
oh wait, yeah, I confess mai innocense.
U fink ai wuz born yesterday?
Oh martoonie! cud it bee??? Cud it reelee bee? We wuz borneded yesterday?
Oar – maybee teh day befoar??
*checks behind Martoonie’s ears*
“hmmm, kinda damp-ish
hey what’s this? (who watches the watchers?)
*snerk* Yesh, JCH4K, we is onlee too dayz old!!!
duh, kaptail ob Bollyveeyah iz Canasta… enny ol ladii noaz dat… muss bin yu abfter awl….
I will not be thrown under the bus alone, sumwon is goin’ along.
ennywai, mai innocent face, lemme show you it.
*looks innocent*
*looks real innocent*
**Looks Rrrreeeeaaaaallllyyy Innocent**
tri battin ur lashes, adn Aisle B warmin op mai Luis de Ville sluggur…
hey, ur teh wun wif teh trafe beedz… Aye onli orfferd tu C iffin ah dupelicat cud B maed… adn Bsydz, U noa nuffink abowt mai beed koalekshun…. oooh, pritty, shiny….
tru, I’ll need to find-em when I get home.
BTW You a Spider Robinson fan? you should be.
*hand ober liddle hart (bery little, mostly black)* dere sir, Aye fere dat Aye hab nawt whatct bassbawl since 1979 wehn mai tendeer felinez war shattured bii teh untiemly deth ob Thurman Munson… wuz ah beri beri bad yaer… teh Cousteau boi crashed hymz plain tu… heavii sy… haz onli wun chile-hood (adn Aye du meen hood) heerow leff…teh inestumabul Stan Brock.
Otai…Aye gess dat sez Aye habbint ah klew… g00gled Spider…nope, kint say Aye noa teh naem (yet). Elizabeth Moon, Charles de Lindt, Pratchett ob koarse, Sharon (?) McCrumb…oooh, adn Tim McCreight bitt tahtz onli fixshun if Aye fink Aye cud ebber du waht hym kin…anudder sy…
smammie
Ai hav nebber red these authors yoo ar menshunigh. Waht kind ov buks ar these?
ai am shur if yoo awl like them, ai probablee wud, too.
Pratchett (ob koarse) ai at leest know teh nayme.
ai awlwaize luk to mai frenz to gib mee the gud reeding suggestions!
Smammie,
One title of Spider is Callahan’s Crosstime Saloon. try lookin’ for dat.
Sharon McCrumb”Bimbos Of The Death Sun”
Nawt at awl whut u mite bee ekspectin. Grate to reed if u’z got convention-goin’ geek frends.
Alsew, jus fun 2 reed.
Thanks, stagehanddan. Ai will trai it too!
there are about 6 or t half-price books on my way home (my path then looks like a cat with a lazer dot) so it isn’t impossible I find some of this.
O, J4K! U is so gracious to thnk someone for offering help with links and searches.
U’d be surprised how many peeps just complain when u give them a link to something they sayed they wanted instead of saying “thx!” even if they can’t use it.
No, I’m not bitter or anything, why u axe?
Ooops, sry. Seriously, I apologize for trangressions on my part. I will assure you that any such incident was unintentional.
I’m just not that smooth on the internet.
Ohai Ebberywun!!
Hadz tu pop out fur medicinal supplies… Vitamin C And Quinine, butt Ayez bakc noa.
Elizabeth Moon, beri gud “spacer” fiction adn an epic fantasy “The Deed of Paksenarrion” (women heros)
Charles de Lindt, hmmm, fantasy… but maibii nawt, lotsa musik, lotsa karacturz, adn, maybii doze tingz happin frum teh corner ob ur eyez, iffin U noa ware tu luk…
Sharon McCrumb, “Bimbos”, the best… and “She Walks These Hills” etc….detecktif novelz moastlii
Tim McCreight… The Complete Metalsmith… okai, sew Aym ah Complete Dorkfish
Terry Pratchett… he cudov invented Cheeezeland… his books are worth every penny just for the footnotes alone
Oh ho, teh LCB iz hear!!! Aye haz a likn 4 yu, adn yu doan ebben hz tu say “thnx”… buttz wud B nys iffin yu doan hurtz mii?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRMNeoaosQw
fur sum raisin, Aye thawt ob yu wehn Aye herd dis lasnite….. run, Smammie, run….
Gosh, smammie, I doesn’t know how to thank u.
Of course, I doesn’t know *why* to thank u, either.
(Jes’ kidding. Better to be thought of than to be late for dinner.)
*sniffle* Well, ok, SHD, but rember in teh future that even us hardened crinimals has feelings 2, u knoes.
Ohhhh!! {{{{{LCB}}}} ov CORSE yoo has felines 2. Yoo tell us about them offen.
*pat pat pat* /*/*Esme/*/* */*/Liam*/*/ (doo thoze luk laik
skirtches to yoo??)
*hind leg shakes involuntarily because of teh skritches*
I r lukkin berree closly at awl peeps eerholes.
I will find it.
Teh wun eered eering steeler iz awn mah “moast wanted ” lizst.
Wen I find dat stinky one eered eering steeler, I will libberate dat eering an reunite it wiv its chudder.
Tidmum. Iz there sumwehre taht peeple who mite hav found it awn the street cud hav turned it in? A few years ago, ai lawst a brand-noo and very prittee citrine eerring. It wuz teh fursst tiem that ai ebber wore it.
But altho ai did nawt find it (it wuz in Sheecago – we were goin to the opera) an ai wuz veree surprized hao menee diffrunt places there are to ask.
Soree yoo cudn’t find it. Did yoo tell us waht it looked laik???
Grrrrrrr.*wayves fistiees at weirdpress….steeled mah reply!!!
Ohai JCH4K
I has asked at awl teh playces we went to ,an teh Taxi cumpny. I try teh Pleece stayshun inna mornin.
Wuz a filligree gold lozenge shaype, with a lozenge shape Garnet in teh middle.
Bowt free kwarters inch lawng. Berree unyoosual desyne.
Mr.T.M botted me teh matchin set several yeers ago,acuz its mah Birfstone
an himz cuddnt affrod to buy me Diymondz.
I will hoap an pray it turns up.
{{{Tidmum}}}} It sounz sew beautius!!! Kwik, cross ur legez, Aym abowt tu hab ah sad 4 yu agin… Aye iz finkin nuffin butz gud lukc thawtz 4 yu.
Fanks {{{smammie}}}
XXXXX *snarffle*
TROO!!!! Sumwuns in teh baffrume
ohai, {{{{{TM,}}}}} haow did yu fined owt yu wur a bit drunk? wuz sumbuddee so rood az tu tel yu dat? Wut wuz liek da eering? peers kined? gowld,? rubeez? Ai’l luk arown nd se if it camed obur heer.
Ohai gmwgs


Teh fact I carnt renember walkin hoam,sore feets an MrT.M telled me-so did mah bro an sis in law, leeds me tew beleeb I was ,indeed, dwunk. Eider dat oar I got teh majic carpet hoam
wuz a grate nite owt an we laffed an laffed awl nite
Wuz gowld n garnet peerced eer dangly kynd.
Ai wish to rejistah a complaynt!
OK, rite ur complaint in dis box []
We will luk into it and get bak to u.
Hab a nice dai.
B-Bye.
Kitteh uses 2 pointy endz to rite complaint in teh box:
[:]
And, ur poynt is…
given look on kitteh face. speeding towards your posterior at dangerous speed.
Translation: When u least eggspect it, I will rain hot death on u until u dies from it.
You rotten swine, you have deaded me!
Oh meh golleh wolleh gosheh cakehs!!! That washeh/sink looks exactly like mine… ‘ceptin for da kitteh and da hose. We no have hose in house.
Dat kitteh no looky like mine at least.
But luk at the culler ob teh warder – kitteh, yu rilly, RILLY, needed a baff!
Yus in-verry-deed. It luks liek haf teh plaigroun cam hoem wit u.
Is rilly awl-whyt kitteh; got a lotta “larva, rince, repeet” to go!
North ov teh eek-waiter is sumr. Meybe kitteh needz a buzz-cut an just let the blond-white floofy harz grow bak in? Shud hav gud covrg by fall ‘n less hareballing 4 awhiel.
Aslo, norf ob eek-waiter wotter flushes teh clok wys. Mai yoosliss tribia, let me show yew it!
Yu gunna trai shabe a kitteh? yu berry brabe pursun.
Mah gudness.
Hab dey eber herd ov using a sprayer?
No wonder kitteh iz mad.
Hims can’t gets clean stewing in hims own swill.
I c washermashin, laundree sink ‘n a gawden hoz. Dis kitteh ws prolly banned frum kichen or baffroom until teh wurst ob teh muck cam orf.
Nawt kwite az dertee az dis wun…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SxjVhahkSSs
yuk! lolofrump drinkz itz baf woddur.
dis wortur am wai 2 wett!!
eye wunt teh rekownt!!!1
der wuz a fowl awn teh plai!!1
an yew kannawt B seereeyuz! neevur!!11!
Ai dint see no burdz.
gess dey got teh flock owtta heer.
Ai gess dey mayd lyke a twee an Leeved!
An iyraite kitteh bees an awesume site;
Wowsers, awn a skayle ov wun tuu tenn, kitteh’s rayge rehgystirs bowt ‘elebentey’
Iyf her ebber geyts aowtta taht tuhbb adn runses awaiy, dere gunna bees
HECK tuu paiy!!!!!
(Coarse, tehy’ll hasta katch hers furst, wich wil bees rlly trikeey)……
Dis iz an owtrage!
Duz u kno whoos I am? Duz U?
Wen diz iz awl ober, u will b FIRED!!!
Ebery lass won ov U!
HAY! WHO FLUSHED TEH TOLLET?
U rotten kids…hao meny tiems duz I hab to tell u…
We gotta get outta dis place
Iffs it’s teh lass fing we eber do…
Gerl, there’s a dry-er place
4 me and u
Jynx! U O me a cheezburgr, plzkthxbai
2 late. I alreddy eated it. *burp*
Teh dryer is next?
Of coarse not. Is nice’n’sunny out. We’ll put kitteh on teh closeline.
Shud Ai peg kitteh bai teh eers or teh tayul?
It’s kinda windy. Better do both.
I hopez dat either lcb or amber has slinky chain-mail suit. for dey sake.
Uh oh – is dat teh sownd ob a caretroll passin owt cowld in shock ai heer?
while dey’re down, let’s do CPR (Cash, Plastic, Rings), ty shoes togedder and skeddaddle.
any proceeds will go toward the “Damnweishongry” Cheezburger Fund.
Ooh, u fink we will has enuff monies for teh martoonies?
pussibly, but we fail to obtayn daquri for kitteh, we in for a good fonging, pain—lots of pain.
huh, pain is just Fronsh bred. Ai nawt scared.
Fronsh bred is oenlee pain if tehy hits yu ober teh hed wiv it!
Ai wud be very croissant if u did dat!
crust in Ceiling Cat for to prevail, no need to be all sourdough ’bout it.
Ai is too well bread to reply to dat.
ah, crumbs.
In teh yeast, a well bread son iz rizing.
yesh, but fronsh bred can be tough, hard, and resilient. Makes a lurverly melee-weapon.
and after the fighting dies down, ya gotta snack right there.
Nd no wepun lef at sene ub krym. :8:
No wepun, but plenny ob krums.
hmmmm, would on-line kitteh download yr cheezburgr?
Dat’s teh sound ov teh kittehs
Dey’r dryin on teh close-line..
All day long they’re in ur yard
Till teh sun is goin’ down
Doan let teh sun go down awn me!!
kitteh dares a beddar lyf 4 mee(ow) adn yooo
teh Aminuls FTW!!1
U got mah Tuxeedo awl wet!!!
Dere goes teh deposit.
Kitteh gonna leave a deposit in ur shoo.
and on yr pillo,bedspread,couch,keyboard.
it doesn’t pay to meddle in the affairs of te kitteh, for they are subtle and will piddle anywere.
Kitteh responds to cutting off of jackuzi, and whereinhades is my dakurie?
Ware iz mah hunnert dollar towel?
Iz nekkid in heer!
Ask LCB
O, all rite. Heer u go, kitteh:
http://www.mine.icanhascheezburger.com/View.aspx?ciid=1235073
Fanx LCB
!!!!
I lurves dis hunnert doller towl
Oh teh porosity!
Yes, kitteh. Ur tonsils does look infected. They will has to come out.
Then afterwerds — r u reddy 4 teh lie? — u’ll get all teh ice creems in teh whirled u can eet!
tonsils yanked out, hosptial ice creem, a no-win situation.
I got nothing against b’fast in bed, just not Hospital b’fast in bed pls.
NAWT want! Unn uhh! Nope! No ways! Negatoree.
Wow, dose whiskers luk moar liek a pider web!
Iz dat a Blak Widow kitteh dat kills u affer teh baff?
She’d kill u during teh baff if’n she could reach u.
She does hab reely beeg wiskars! Hao cum mai beeg kitteh (>18 lbs) habings sush teeny short wuns?
OMG! Dat’s mai Dad! Dat was hiz bery faberit thing to sae. We’re finkin’ of puttin dat on hiz toomstone.
Mai dang blame teenagar just said the saim ting. He says dad iz u.
U should talk to his soopervisor about that.
I better gets lotsa biskies when I gets home!
Hewminz shoodz habz chekkt
wiff Kitteh lawnnnnng beefoar dis
fee~assko happennd!
Cleer wawrm wett iz nawt
Kitteh’z frennd. Baffz happenz wennz
Kitteh wantz dem 2
Kitteh taykz baff wiff
herz tunng! KittehDuz Nawt Wantz
dis embayrussmentz!!!
Jack.
In taht cayse, kiteh
shud nawt go clymin chim knees
Or Baffz will happun!
Or crawlz aroun unner houses or splore messy garrages.
scary cat is varry scary..
Ahlzo berry MAD!
I wanded dat tu go heer
Chek owt teh kullur of teh wadder. A dun tink thiz wuz rekreeashunl baffing.
Kitty must have had a good time to make water that dirty.
Berry trooo!
An nau diz kitteh iz PURRING!
Ahlzo berry MAD!
ugly cat
Juz wen wet. Rezda de taime is GOR-gusss!
OMG that iz mai zeekie kat, idennikal markings an looks jest as meen.
austin, u wudn know an uggly kat if it bit u in teh but.
tat kitteh be durty
Daon wanna tink wat made wadder dat dirty…
No way to tell if this cat is ugly…It’s scared and mad. But sure can tell when someone who can’t possibly make such a determination is … well … not smart.
Dis is teh saddest thig in teh whole wide world!!!1!!!1 whoevah took this picis so mean!
Thats Cruel.
OMG!!!1! TAHT KITTAH IZ SOOOOOOOO MAD!!!! I NOS I WOOD B!!!1!
I b finking himz reddy to showing off himz pointee endz!
Wannasmile! Dis ur nawt secund nawt secund, iddin it?
Cool!
Poyntee endz nau available from wiskas an’ eerz.