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Current time: 7:23 AM Vet apptointment @ 9:00 AM
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Fotoshopped!!!
ROTFPIMP!!!!
ohai leeza! Az u can seeing, ai R wurking berree berree hardly todai!
Me 2!!
Contrary rats on ur top spot, and wut a macramay we haz!
In honnor uv the recent goings on, wud u liek a dans to J. Geils?
Freeze Frayme!
me free!!!
Grate choyce! Heer’s teh linkee:
youtube.com/watch?v=ebkl7Yk_OLE
*boogie boggie tern step step*
Woo-hoo!
Teh. Bestest. Nawt. Sekond. Comment. Eber. !
PIMP funneah!
y ur welcoem!! I preshe ate all teh incredi…..ikreeedv…..graaaate hoomurus peeplz her!
i loled so loud…..my goggie and 2 of my kittehs ran into teh room to c what waz rong with me!
Nao U making MII lol wif taht imij!
y fanks 2 u!
bleeme; i keepem gezzin allatime bout what im doin nao!
Beez vry careful today about using teh P/F word, 4.5K. There is handlers from teh IUGPWLPOPPW armed wif blowdarts and they might think u is a UGPWLPOPPW.
Iz okay. Ai usinged teh F/P wurd.
and no spoonering it eethur!
U wuz lukky to get away wif the popcorm indecint.
Basemint Cat maded mii do it.
Basemint Cat just gives ebul ideas. Base Mint Cat givvs ebul eye-deers -and- fwesh breth. Sew, ib yew arr ebul, alwais go to Base Mint Cat instead.
Well, ok, but I still has a bad feeling about this. Heer, u better drink this IUGPWLPOPPW Blowdart Antidote just to be safe.
*hands gallon jug to 4.5K*
4.5K: glug, glug, glug, burp
O noes!!1! I gived u teh rong jug! That one hads teh trooth seerum innit!
Reel naem: SuzieQ
Aj: 19
Wut ai did onna weekend: Well, der wuz this reelee buff-looking gui n mmphmph…
leeza claps floofie paw ober DK’s mowf adn drags her owf to D’Beaker Labs to looking furr antidote furr troof serum*
sowry DK, I haz to stuff a skwirrl in ther so i can haz my hands free
**stuffs skwirrl tayle furst into DK’s mouf**
Now… whut do we haz here in teh labs?
Opposit uv troof serum wud be…. lie serum? That don’t sowd too gud.
How abowt dis?
**Picks up a bezoar, and stuff it down DK’s throat.**
Are u ok??? Say sumfin!!
Chatter mmphmph… chatter mmphmph… chatter…
oh sowry, let me taek that skwirlll owt.
*** gentlee removes skwirrl from Diamond kittehs’ mouf ***
Now, wut wuz that?
Ai cannot telling a lye. Ai sedded “Chatter mmphmph… chatter mmphmph… chatter…”
LOL!
let me axe a test kwesyun to see if teh bezoar werked.
How many swallow duz it take to carrie a 1 lb coconut?
*Must resist*
*GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!*
What do you mean? An African or European swallow?
Fanks Maus!
It appeers my werk heer is dun.
NO! Yoo has to finish teh joek! Sumbuddy has to say “I don’t know that”. Uh oh…
*Sprooooinnng*
Aaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrgh!!!
Are yew suggesting coconuts migrate??!!11?!?1!!??
ok ok calm down everrywun!!
lets start over wif a new kwestyon.
Wut’s yer faverite colur?
Blu
*As if heard from a great distance*
Um… A liddel help down heer? Sumbuddy?
LEEEEZAAAAA!!! Wher R U? Maus needs HALP!!
Did yoo guyz heer sumthin??
they can grip it by the husk!!1!!
*sigh*
ok!
***grumbuls abowt ice kyoob brooses and FRUs***
Maus heer is a balloom. Can u reech the cord?
***danglols balloom cord down in teh Gorge uv Eternal Perrill***
*Jump*
Darn! Missed!
*JumpJump*
Missed Again!
*Whistles*
Petunia! Here girl!
*Petunia flies in on her anti-grabbity skaytbord*
*Maus jumps on*
Fanks ol’ girl. Away we gooooooooooo……
Back tew teh Footure part 2 Ref, FTW!!!
btw,
(ignore teh “btw.” mai indecisive and trigger happy commenting, let me show yew it)
***maus is flotin majestically owt uf the Gorge on Petoonya and her anti-grabbitee bored.***
***Suddunlee, a stray dart frum the Troll hunt flies over and jams in the nootron recirdulaytor!***
Oh noes!!!
*** Maus and Petoonya plummets to erf, and we onlee has barely enuf time to majik a big pile uv whippy creem underneef them!!!***
Ker—-SPLATTTTT!!!!
Petoonya duz not luk happee.
*And she wonders why I retaliate*
Petunia, yoo knows wut to do…
*Petunia trots over to leeze-b*
*Pick up up by the collar*
*Walks over to The Gorge*
*Dramatic Music*
TO BE CONTINUED
JOIN US TOMORROW
SAME CAT-TIME
SAME CAT-CHANNEL
leeza, R U going to taek taht lying do… er… dangling?
**humph**
I fink all uv cheezdom noes hoo throo the furst pi, Maus!
Well DK, we will haz to see.
Will Maus throw me over the cliff?
Or will he relent when he ‘members the blooberry cheezcaek I maked him?
And the nice sawfty landing he had in the whippy creem, when a dart not of my invenshun took owt Petoonya’s anti-grabbity??
Toon in tomorrow to find owt!
Sry leeza. It’s taht yoo alwaize seem to be arownd when tehse fings happun. A cowinkydink? I wunders…
I haz a talent…fur bein in the rong place at the rite tiem.
Kint…… breev!!!!!1!!!!elebenty!!!!!
Laffin…… tew……hard!!!!!1!!!
Itt seeemz tew mee taht yoo aer kinda liek Paddington: juss teh kine ob bare—ahh, kitteh—taht fings happin too!
“Take of Pearls prepared, Crab’s eyes, red Coral, white Amber Hart’s-horn, oriental Bezoar, of each half an ounce, powder of the black tops of Crab’s claws, the weight of them all, beat them into powder, which may be made into balls with jelly, and the skins which our vipers have cast off, warily dried and kept for use”. Complete Herbal, Nicholas Culpeper, 1653
uhoh DK… that sownds suspishushlly liek a majik spell!!
Caretroll no. 14 will be on yer tayle in a minnit! Kwik, hide!!
HP ref FTW!!!
Don’t think it’s shopped. Kitteh has reflection in car. And kittehs do laik tyres… had a friend who had byke tyres shredded by kitteh klaws.
Nao dat ai red teh nawt-sekund fred uv teh dai, dis maeks MUCHLEE moar sense.
LOL!
WTH IS WRONG WIF U HOW IS IT PHOTOSHOPPED?
But kitteh: teh vet’s office is rite next door!
oh LCB, ai wuz needin yew yestiddays……….. onna “To acses emrgnci LOL ”
iffn yew gets teh time read fru an see if ai handled sitsheashun aprowpwiately… wuz lukkin 4 yr bakup an had major ordeal
(fink he werks 4 Kernal Klink)
O, well, u see I was unavoidably, er, detained yesterday. But u dids a good job under teh circumstanses.
Those stoopy firemans. U would think they could think 4 themselves oncet in a while, but u would be rong. Let me tell u teh seekrit to dealing wif thems.
*pulls jamamakitty aside*
U just has to *whisperwhisperwhisperwhisperwhisper* and if they doesn’t respond then u take a *whisperwhisperwhisper* and put it on their *whisper*. That usually works, but sometimes u has to *whisperwhisper* them in teh *whisperwhisperwhisper* until they *whisper*. Alternatively, u can *whisper* their *whisperwhisperwhisperwhisper* with a *whisperwhisper*. That leaves a mark but it’s not like u didn’t warn them.
LOLZ!!!!!!!1!
Elebenty burgers furr u, LCB!
yew has tawt me much, o grate wun!
Hay! U wasn’t spose to hear that!
We’ll have to debrief u now.
uh… shud we call teh fyremenz for dis?
Sorry, no. Our in-house debriefing squad will be here momentarily. Just sit here quietly and hold this xylophone between ur knees.
Maus? PdB? She’s ready.
OK. Duz she get teh $5 debreefing, or teh $Elebenty debreefing?
*Gets owt the chainsaw and teh ostrich feathers*
*checks wallet*
Um, how much debreefing can u does for $1.53? Anda exspired mCdonalds coopon?
AAAAAA!!!! *runs an hydes*
HALP! HALP! HALP!
For taht much, I will play Osmonds Brothers records endlessly, until her brayne terns to oatmeel.
BWAhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa………
Den yoo can taek off her briefs…
Ur trying to entrap me! I is not in teh debreefers union. If I takes off anyones briefs who isn’t a firemans u will get that mob kitteh to slash mah tires, won’t u?
Curses! Foiled again!
*Twirls maustache*
Put that maustache down before u hurt somebuddy and go get KTNF! She ranned away. Fully briefed!
*Whistles*
Come B.R. We haz sum chasin to do…
*Rides off*
Ai’m tellin Petunia!!!!
No need. Petunia is up above saving Maus.
Sir Reel, ai thot yew knew better dan tew trifle wif me…. ai will powt and whine and call teh cheezgals again….
.
unkunvenshunal weapnry, ai haz it
Yes, sirrah, teh cheezgals R at teh reddee…
wahooo!!!! 4.5kittehs yew are teh win!!!
and on that encourajaming noet, ai shall sai adieu for a wile… later frends!
Ohai, nu methud? Ai thot wii joosta teh “flashy thing” ed her…:?)
Mah flashy thing is in teh shop. I tried to flashy thing mahself after I wented to teh dubble feature at teh JCH4K moovie theater last week where they was showing “Gigli” and “Ishtar” and teh fetzer valve on teh flashy thing blowed up.
Fanks fur taht updayt, LOLCB.
*wispers Ai hoap it nawt bad form tu jump in wif comintz*
Yoo regloors R teh TAWPS heer.
Not at all! Ur form was just fine. U bobbled a little during ur backflip but u stuck ur landing. 9.5 from me, but u hasta give 8.5 points to teh judge from teh Soviet Union.
LOLCB joo R mush gen R us.
fank yew, fank yew berry mush
but but Carrie Enabla onny gibs yew teh 8!!
hmmm … we needs teh sine-tific approach to debreefing. Let x be teh breefs in question. Apply an inverse transform. Multiply by the cos(pi). Apply teh inverse transform again Next we will add to x …
*should do the trick*
yew jus leeve mai breefs alone!!
But LCB said we had to de-breef you. We wuz jus doin whut we wuz askeded…
and iffn LCB axed yew to jump offa bridge wud yew do that? HMMMMMM?????
depends if she had teh round people-catchy thingy deployed or nawt …
Ai fot shee wuz waring breefs, NAWT depends
yeah, wut maus said.
wen in doubt, blame it on LCB.
(akshually, wen not in dowt, it’s a pretty gud idee too)
.
ummm… that wuzn’t nine-wun-wun you were dialing tehre, wuz it?
those aren’t fire syreens ai hear in teh distance, are they?
ai haz it awn speed dyal…. awla teh fyrepeeps we be needn awla da tyme, yew know…
akshully Maus haz alreddy been flung off a brij and is akshully stuck in the Gorge ov Eternal Perill, up abuv.
U is just being chased by hiz astral projekshun.
is teh astral projekshun nawt sew bad as teh reel vershun?
Or a stand-in, perhaps?
well I didn’t sai that! Neethur is gud. But he haz tu expend much moar
energiez in the astral projeshun, so he will tyre kwicker.
If u can stai ahed of him, he shud be waring owt soon.
uh oh…..
leeza, dey are tryin to steel mai breefs!!!! ai’m runnin off tew teh NB wif dese nice fyremenz. Iffn yew don’t heer from me inna few hours, um…. dun werry.
shhhhh Lucy!!
We haz to assess teh sityooashun.
Things haz taken a scaree turn heer….
okay… Lucy.. are u all rite?
Kafleen haz got awai.
we will verry sloooowly… back owt uv the thred….
Dufflepuds!
Da kitteh ess… exess.. espe… blew dat one up.
I iz in ur driveway, shreddin ur tyres!!
Sumbuddy helps me push tihs car. I iz stuck…
Gotta…wurk…fast!
*ScritchyScritchyScritchyScritchy*
*ScritchyScritchyScritchyScritchy*
*Ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss*
Gud job Maus!!
Vet apointment!! Qwik get outta the car!!
Iz makes deel, u not get mi fixed n u not haf to fix van kthnxbai
Kitteh no want go to vet!
Must shred tyres!
Mob kitteh ar messing wid Ur tirez
Be careful humin, odderwise U beez sleeping wid the fishes
Pimp Mai Ride Kitteh Finksh Yew need sum 21’s wib teh low profyle tyres and teh hydrolicks!
Well now we knoes whut happened to teh tire on teh bus for teh IUGPWLPOPPWs.
ICHC’s god like ability to esplane ebryting at wurk agen!
Ai sowwy, Ais nawt smrt. Waz iz IUGPWLPOPPWs?
Yash u R smart – iz a new akranim. C prebious thred at 5:56 am.
And he’s hided teh car kees, and taked all teh boltz off teh Carreeying Bocks, an coffd a furball in teh peeps shues an hes thinkin abowt chooing sum wires an toobs an things underneet if he cud tell which wuns dont taest bad or go *zap*…
Ohai, lolcatburglar!
Teh tire on teh bus for teh IUGPWLOPOPWs?! O NOES!
Goggeh tells meh waht tutored meenz–DUZ NAWT WANT
Teh Far Side ref FTW!!!
Tanks choo 4.5
doez ne1 else bai kitteh FUD sidz me? speeking of teh Far Side…….
Yup!
Oh, n blessyoo, Calvin13!
Whatch out…kitteh has a mean streak!
kittehs don’t streak!!
They haz no close!!
young nekkid… kitteh?
Duzzen dat meenz day AWLWAIZ streekz?
prettie much!
as leest in my howse!
Whut is goin on hear? Evfurrbuddy gots an avatar naow??? I been bizze wurkin…and den I git to pop ovfur for a minnit….an yu guize all gots avatarz…hmmm, I musta mist somefin.
But yooz gotz avatar, 2!!1!
Hi COL – yeah, Munday or so we all gotz teh pritty kwilt-blok avatars. An tehy stay teh saem, too, evr time yu com in an say sumthin.
Ai been soo bizee at teh stoopid hoomin werky thingy haf not maed commentz fur a while noaw (back to mai lurker stage thease daze) this jus be speriment…do I has teh avatar…..oz it cool???….my insecurities, let me show you them
wut a loverly kolor, lovcharliecat!
Ohai ebrybuddy! Eats FursDay
*its ok, ai donut say teh yoo no wut werd
Ai wheely lyke teh kwilt-blok kolor fill fingees. Mayks mii happitale. Wii can go bak tu NE dai adn C wut spef…sepcif…sertin pepl has seded. Pluss wii can luuk fur R speshul frenz tu say Ohai. kthxbai
I jus wanna kno wayr ebbrybuddy got der pritty doylees frum!! I want wun foar MY commentz tu!
*sigh*
oh fank yu so berry mush kafleen, iz not a bad kolor iz it! Urz iz loverly too, ann eben tho I hab no timez laterly for the commenty ting u guiz hab been sooo funneh thees daze jus reedin maeks up for missin out
Toonces soon found the hardest part of driving was removing the evidence of dogs from the treads.
beeg LOL
@@@@@@@@
no shotz tewdae!
Ok. SERIOUSLY. When did icanhascheezburger cease to be about clever political, science, and geek references, and start to be about people’s insipid daydreams about their cat’s daily routine?
Come on people, don’t just give five burgers to every picture your grandma captioned and put up on the voting page! Have a little discretion, for pete’s sake! You’re making this website SUCK!
Wow. That IUGPWLOPOPW bus sure was jam-packed today, wasn’t it?
Kwik, Dart Gun!!
uh…izzit just mee, oar awr dere moar tahn yur yooshooul amount ov trollz tewdae?
yesh, dere definitely is…. dey is awl making me has a sad!!
*sniffle*
ok srsly ppl! Lucy an me is in need of sum cheerin up! *sniffle sniff*
KTNF, awwww cheer up. Dose UGPWLOPOPW kin nawt tayk R fun awai, R rayn on R purrade, oar mayks teh jujmintz ob ICHC peepz. Tehy nawt werthee :wicked)
yew shure?
Ai R pawsitib. Ai hab seen awl teh tymes peepz has kom heer adn has teh cheeri affer werds. Jess gibbit a fyo maor sekonds, Ai fink yooll be fyne. Heer habba choklit possum adn a nyce sawf blankee wiff peenk hartz onnit.
ooo hao luvverly!!!! fank yew fikshunitteh!!
(btw, ai nebber new wat yer name ment til jus nao when i roted it…. it has niffink to do wif fish at awl! lol)
onlee fur teh halibut, lyke Mooby Dik
ai wish wii wuddnt haz trollz at awl.
Dis fot issa unim…inicor…teh saym fur moas obus.
Oh come, come, Miss Lucy – think of all the fun we’d miss if we couldn’t go troll hunting with LCB!!
Kwik, dart gun adn hayer nets.
ohai Lucy and K2 — cheerzup. If we didn’t have teh trolls, we wuddnt appreshiate how nice all teh rest of us are. next thing yew noes, we wud be shooting teh poysun darts at teh sine-tists
Ai wuz abowt tew maek teh saem point abowt preesheeatun teh nawt-trollz. GMTA, MrBeaker!
troo troo… berry gud point indeed!
u can haz more meenopaws den meee??
*stifled snert*
i fink she taked mine. kan haz back, plz? needz it. kthx.
Ai gib U mine, it nawt gud NE moar, nobble T wore awf.
‘Bowt elebenty fibe yeers ago
kthx, gets bovversum but koms in handy sumtiems.
iz at taht akwurd stage wehre too old for moer babbeez, too yung to not haz to fink abowt it aneemor.
Ai knose wut yoo meens…befoar ai hadded teh surjury, ai yewsed tew sai, “Ai wish teh stoopy menno wud juss PAWS, awlreddy!”
Elaine, it never STARTED being “about” those things. Read the tagline; it says “Lolcats ‘n’ Funny Pictures”. What you’re talking about is style, not substance.
Teho, there used to be style guidelines, which I can’t find on the site anymore, about the type of content to be submitted. I suppose if the Cheezburgers took it off, it means that they decided to change the style of the site, which of course is their prerogative.
It’s just that, to me, this photo doesn’t inspire lolz! It’s not funny. It’s sort of cute, but on the front page of one of the most popular cult sites on the internet, is “sort of cute” good enough?
And @sarita, I’ve visited the site almost every day since it launched. I just don’t post much.
nm, found the style guidelines here: icanhascheezburger.com/faq-on-submissions/
Write a capshun. need tips? try current events, pop culture references, movies, songs.
1. Originality is moar better.
2. Clear and concise ’cause kittehs have short attenshun… Ooh, catnip!
3. No profanity *gasp* pleez.
NM, I found it here: http://icanhascheezburger.com/faq-on-submissions/
“Write a capshun. need tips? try current events, pop culture references, movies, songs.
1. Originality is moar better.
2. Clear and concise ’cause kittehs have short attenshun… Ooh, catnip!
3. No profanity *gasp* pleez.”
kleerly, yoo doant freqwent dis site neerly as offen as yoo shud.
ok, HOO iz maeking teh website suk?
Very likely the same “person or persons unknown” who let the dogs out, but please don’t leak that to the press.
Wel, awl Ai haz tu sez iys taht sumewun shud noatifye Fyumi tu geyt her happitayl owt ov reetyremint;
OK: Ai wil du iyt:
Ai wil baurrow teh skwirrelols taht maikes teh wippy-creem adn seynd tehm tu Fyumi wooz sunnying herseylfe onna beech-chayre at teh moat wif hers pereniyal mynt juulip adn see-fuud sammidge;
(her haz bin dere ebber synce her caime bak frum spryng brake vakashumon)
Tehm wil delibber teh messyidge tu geyt hers butt iyn geer adn cum bak tu wurk awn hers reguhler troll patrol jawb !
(Teh skwirrelols knoe enuff tu nawt cum bak unles tehy haz Fyumi iyn tow wif tehm!!!!)
I be sekonding dat. We def… deffi.. fur shure need Fyumi rite naow.
now if only the trolls were as porous as i’ve heard that the kittehs are. or that i could accidentally mash a few under a brake pedal. that’d be good times.
you want something that conforms to your notion of what a lolcat should be, submit a few yourself, Elaine.
you do have that option, you know.
in fact, i don’t recall anyone forcing you at gunpoint to visit ICHC (whereas i was once beaten savagely, chained up and locked in the trunk of a very nice Mercedes for a very bumpy ride from Prescott to Scottsdale down AZ 87 while a POISON album was playing, which just ruined the whole experience for me)
while some of the pictures may be rather hit-or-miss, SRSLY wen did teh coment sekshun bekom a haven for kranky litter-box-dumplings who complain but don’t contribute…liek u
Geeze, TC—iffn owr oanlee rool iz tew plai nyse—hao cum yoo beein sew meen? Yoo cann sai teh saym soart of fing wifowt hertin ennywun.
I do submit, and have gotten on the voting page, etc.
I miss old school ICHC.
Is there an ICHC forum? I e-mailed the burgers to suggest a “Cheezburgers’ Choice” category that maintains style guidelines while also allowing popular pics with majority votes in another category.
If you agree that it’s hit-or-miss, wouldn’t that offer a place to see more of the hits and less of the misses?
Dear Elaine. Hai. Janet heer. I think everyone has misunderstood what you said. We thought you were talking about US – the commenters. Not the captions.
Of course, we have nothing to do with the captions. We certainly do not control them.
And I do think you have a good point. I think the earlier captions were perhaps of higher quality and also funnier. Think of “Noir Cat.” And so many others.
And – I guess I must admit that I rather miss those too. But perhaps it is cyclical and will come around again. Like so many comment threads. Sometimes we go for days being just – Ok. And then – suddenly – several brilliant ones in a row!! You just never know.
And I DO recognize your name and know you have been here before.
So please forgive for attacking you. They thought you were attacking us. Which I now clearly see you were not at all.
{{{{{Elaine}}}}} Sorry. We can get very defensive – because we love it so here and have so much fun.
Mai stratejy to fight inflashun
let me show you it
Heck, sounds better than the current one…
And you, Teho, never disappoint me. Never.
That’s so funny. I love this photo. I’m a total cat lover so I can relate. Most of my cats just scatch the heck out of my couch. Maybe that’s a better way for them to get their nails down.
Wel, kitteh haz bowt 1 and a haff hrs. befoar veterminayian poyntmint tu wurk onna tyre;
Iyf her staurts skritchying rlly haurd rite naow, her mite bees abul tu duz enuff damyidje tu teh tyre taht iyt mite jes POP!! POP!! BAM!! adn faul offa teh rimm.
(Uoosuallee tihs wud nawt wurk; butt kitteh bees despirete-
Harlbls Remoovul: DO NAWT WANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
iz two tired to
go to teh vet
so im gonna take u down
to one tyre
May I ask when everybody got quilt patterns next to their names?? This is new to me.
Badger – this is way to late, i think, for yoo ebber to see this. But – where hav yoo BEEN?
And it happend just a few days ago.
Nao – if we awnlee wud get teh burgerz bak!!
Oh rilly? I no saw this kummin. And my green kolor…it is not so much want worthy.
This is freaking brilliant. Great job. I laughed my ass off!
Maybee nekst time yu’ll think befor yu vet…
wud be bettr wizout creepee voicez.
moar importantlee:
nap @ 8:50 to sleep thru hooman shoutin.
thats funny!
^ _ ^ It’s funny, haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa