Comments on: Tiger Woods

By: lunarmommy

lunarmommy — Thu, 03 Apr 2008 16:44:12 +0000

oh hai. i fownd goff ball plaiyr. tasted liek chikin.

By: lunarmommy

lunarmommy — Thu, 03 Apr 2008 16:40:47 +0000

ooh, i’z laffin so hard it hurtz…

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 02:30:58 +0000

heh heh heh

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 02:30:25 +0000

egg-sallent, Dana. tygers awn tape; do want.
.
we looks forward to yer reports frum teh feeld. thnx!!

By: Dana T

Dana T — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 21:49:18 +0000

Ai kan see eggzacly to whut thai r refrring. Iz veri moshinul, beeng wif teh tygers. Thai do mayke menny soundz whut cood be soundin liek teh giiant purrz. Anteh guy what went to da tyger temmple onlee teh tygerz dint no his well enuf. Thai ver purrticularz bout hoo thai lurvs. Ai finks taht whut thoz hoomins herd was tey ff-ff-ff soundz of teh tygerz “ohai!” Thai maykes teh ff-ff-ff wen thai kummferbal an relaxified.

Heerz gud videoz of teh ff-ff-ff noyze. Memberer, al teh tygerz soundz a bit dfrrent frum eech udder.

http://tinyurl.com/yu73xm

By: sweepea

sweepea — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 15:14:19 +0000

could be sed dat teh theeretishunz shovelz *ahem* exkrementz, two , just teh theeeretikal kine.
yew duz no wut PhD stanz fur, rite?

By: Feelionophiliac

Feelionophiliac — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 15:03:48 +0000

Ai hab lukt, n kant fynde teh orijinul akowntz, but tehre wur tu:
Wun wuz a blynde wumun hu wuz allowd 2 snorgle a tygur aftur it wuz anesthetizd 4 surguree, so it wuz kompleeeeetlee relaxt. She karefulee drapt herself akros it as she scratcht itz hed n nek, n kryd, it wuz so mobing.
Teh odder wuz a trabelur hu bisited a temple in India wer tehy raazd teh tygurz frum cubz, n cudduld n snorgled dem frum cubhood awn up, jus liek we do wif owr kittehz. He sed it wuz teh totullee ossim, 2 heer teh… wut he deskrybed az purring, wif kapitul letturz, but wen he gotz teh klos enuf 2 petz dem, tehy wudunt purr so mutch az wen the tempul preests n akolytez wuz petting dem. He felted teh sad, taht his approtch prebented tehm frum relaxing enuf 2 purr liek taht, so he baked awaa, agin, n tehy started 2 … wut he cawld purring, again. WANT!!

By: Dana T

Dana T — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 12:04:32 +0000

Mai mawm wood b so proud! Tank for teh nu title of Cheef Ajjunkt Tigerologist! I wil do mai ver ver best for daBeaker labz. I bet da theer…theritish, um, in da lab gaiz don’t get as durty as I du. (Itz not awl snorgling, ya know. Therez lots of shuvveling tu.

I will ware my nu chayne male armer and my industreeal snorgle snorkle at all tymes. Will get big kittehs on taype! (Or diggital ekwivalint.)

Dose theeror..thereo…um, lab gaiz, don’t knoz whats thei yakking bout!

I knot bate mai breffs. I alreddy bate enuff. :^)

By: Shanmao

Shanmao — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 10:32:23 +0000

Mah daddeh still singz dat 1 awl teh tiem.

“We haz met teh enomny an he iz us”.

By: Shanmao

Shanmao — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 10:26:50 +0000

O I FAWT dat luked laik sumwunz hed.

Wait. U meen Larry haz moar flavr den goff bawlz? Dis is Larry weer tawkin abut! Tiger muss b desprit.

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 09:36:22 +0000

I have over a dozen Pogo books including the rare and valuable:
‘Pogo’s Jack Acid Society Black Book’. I also have the hard cover edition of the POGO Song book with great lill numbers like ‘Baby don’t you Sugar Me”
(oh baby don’t you sugar me, oh sugar don’t you sugar me, or try to spoon, don’t stir me boy – cause us is throon – jest roll them eyes rite out that door)”. And thenere the unforgetabobble “One Small Suite for Two Brown Eyes” (quick my love, fetch the torch, there is no longer dark). I’m speck these had an unquantifiable influents on me durink muh formative years.

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 09:28:07 +0000

“Dek us awl wid Boston Charlie
Wallah Wallah Wash. an Kallamazoo.
Nora’s freezin onna trolly,
Swaller Dollar, cauliflower, alleygaroo.
Don’t we know archaic barrel?
lullabye, Lilly boy, Louisville Lou.
Trolly Molly don’t love Harold,
Boola Boola, Pensicoola, Hullaballoo!”

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 09:20:58 +0000

Xcept der Jwalkers – I luvs NYC and iffen you visit The City as often as Esther and I do you hasta learn to Jwalk so I’se switching Jwalkers for Junior executives. Theys mostly self important ambitious meatheads.

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 09:17:51 +0000

How much do I luv these cheezpeeps!?!?! They starts an alphabetical list ob almost anyting at the drop of a cheezburger. I particular luv watchin wut happins after T Itz always intersting: Vlad the Impaler – X spouses – zealous protiutes ..
I need annuder box ob tissues I’se laffin so hard my noze is dripping and muh eyes watering.

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 09:02:06 +0000

Next time I play dis course I’m springing fer the cart. Walking is just out.

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 09:00:23 +0000

Jest How mush middleaged overweight white guy on plaid pants do you tink a tyger can nom? Tyger mighta schoffed or removed meybe 50 lbs but that leaves over 200 pounds of the fat bastid that I gotta lug around. I could have left the carcase inna sand trap where the tigger buried it but we carpooled and Larry drove. I needs the keys

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 08:55:11 +0000

The tyger put wuts left of Larry In der litter bawx.

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 08:52:19 +0000

How much middleaged overweight white guy in plaid pants do you fink a tiger can nom? Iffen stoopy tigger could have eaten more, den draggin wutz left wooden be so tuff.

By: Shanmao

Shanmao — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 05:51:00 +0000

An I gawts teh pointy enz 2 reeli mayke it stick!

By: Shanmao

Shanmao — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 05:47:53 +0000

Ewww. Obvyusly, Larry teh Caddie gawt et b4 he skoopt owt teh kitteh bawks. Oar mayb caws de dint.

By: Shanmao

Shanmao — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 05:44:10 +0000

Gawt 2 hold a babbeh last yeer – 6 weeks owld an alreddy bigger den r Maine Coon. Cud jus image-in hao beeg an gorjus hez gonna get. Naytur, she duz it rite.

By: Shanmao

Shanmao — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 05:29:51 +0000

Oh, dat gawt me. ROFL. Cawfee on teh cawmputr skreen.

But, won teh tiger still b chawmpin awn Larry? Doan wants 2 drag him if tigerz not dun yet!

By: altosinger

altosinger — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 04:31:37 +0000

Mai Daddy had uh Pogo buk wen ai wuz growin up—wun abowt “G. O. Fizzicle Pogo.” (actual spelling) Awlso grew up heerin Dek us Awl Wid Bawstun Charlie. Menny laffs, an moas awsum!

By: altosinger

altosinger — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 04:28:28 +0000

Ditto. !

By: cweenmj

cweenmj — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 03:37:05 +0000

Dana, I iz soooo jelus uv u 2 b snorgling teh tygrrz.
Dew b careful. I loening u mai chayn male armer.
Adn plz 2 b taking the reein4sed snorgle snorkle.
Also 2 b taking teh recordifcashun devises 2 recordifyingz uv
teh tyger purringz (oar not purringz) 4 teh post snorgle
data evaluashunz.

By: 4½ Kittehs

4½ Kittehs — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 03:27:14 +0000

Zellus prossil… prostl… um, peeps taht wantz to “conbert” u.

“Oateeoz frum teh hellth fud stoar” – ai’m wif u dere, sweepea.

By: 4½ Kittehs

4½ Kittehs — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 03:21:37 +0000

Dis cite sur am bery edumacashunal in adit… addti… an teh funneh too! N cheezpeeps so nyce adn frendlolee.

Fanks Dana T fur ff-ff-ff-ing teh strypee kittehs fur us!

By: greasycat

greasycat — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 03:09:02 +0000

Uh, er, those aren’t golf balls in that sand.

By: sweepea

sweepea — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 02:51:41 +0000

*duznt hear a fing*

♫blinded me wif science, science, science♫

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 02:47:11 +0000

pssst….
yew shudn’t noes about taht stuff. watch aowt if you is followed home by black unmarked SUV wif tinted windows an no license plates …. down’t say we didunt warns yew.

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 02:42:59 +0000

To: Dana T
From: Phillipe d’Beaker
BioAcoustics Dibision, d’Beaker Laboratories
.
We looks 4ward to continyood collaborashun on teh Tiger Purring Project (TPP). Wun hypofesis is that teh “purr-like soundz wen breefing out” referred to by Peters (2002) may well be the same as the “grumbly-yowly happy sounds” wif teh “ff-ff-ffing” which yew report.
.
Ai shud add that there is a debate between teh Theoretical Dibishun an teh Fiedl Reshurch Dibision. Theoretical gize wantz to do compyooter simulations and phylogenetic analysis and biomechanical calylashuns to decide if tigers purr. The Field Reshurch gize is wif you — they makes impolite commints about teh theoritishuns and says that the tigerz can decides for themselves if they purrs or not, and that if sumwun wants to disagree wif teh tigurz about that, its toooo bad fur them. They recomminds impirical inbestigashun involving (careful) snorgling.
.
N-e-way, we hopes taht yew will accept a posishun as d’Beaker Laboratories Chief Adjunct Tigerologist fer this impowrtant research project. Teh whirled will be waiting wif baited brefs for your reports.

By: sweepea

sweepea — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 02:35:36 +0000

‘kay, wink wink if yew say sew.
i betz yew reely getin a hole liberry ob sine tifical buks wif weerd spearmints adn plotz fer teh whirled dominashun. oar mebee jest bawkses ob skochwiskey in buk boxes. oar bof- a lethal cominashun.

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 02:29:47 +0000

ai wuz referrin (in a sortuv ambiguous sentence, ai must admit) to teh arribal of the article. yew might wanna think 2wice about being dere if it was teh hole liberrrry arrives, bcoz probbbly the arribal wud be supervised by Igor. him has 10-dancy to be a little loose wif things like OSSHA, hardhats, dropping big bildings frum a haight, and sow on.

By: Feelionophiliac

Feelionophiliac — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 02:06:46 +0000

FeNOMiNOMiNOMiababul, Jack!
Wurdz kan hardlee konvaa teh ossimness ob yur Haiku.

By: Dana T

Dana T — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 02:02:26 +0000

Well, ok too. All I knowz iz that mai tygerz (17 of them) are wai happy kids and I’ve never herd one do the purrz. (In 5 years.) They for sure mayke many diffrent grumbly-yowly-happy soundz, sum soundz lieks growlz but aren’t, lotz of ff-ff-ffing which can soundz very diffrent from kitteh to kitteh. They r veri, veri vocal. (Specially the grrls) Teh coogarz, on teh other pawz, rlly PURR. Liek litty bitty kitteh but loudz.

Cleerly, mor reserch is called for on mai partz. Must snorgle big stripey kittehs untils they purrz. But onlee veri, veri, careful liek. Iz sur teh othr folkz nawt maaking it up.

I will ff-ff-ff all the big kittehs for every1.

By: sweepea

sweepea — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 01:20:47 +0000

ummmmm, Prof. d’Beaker, duz you meen teh arribal ob the librrry oar the arribal ob teh buk is pending?
‘cuz, golly, i shure wud like to be dere wen a whole liberrrry arrives…

By: cweenmj

cweenmj — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 01:13:10 +0000

Wen ur around i just wanting 2 b alone.

By: kafleen

kafleen — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 01:09:04 +0000

Annuddur GMTA!

By: kafleen

kafleen — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 01:08:30 +0000

Excellent!!!!!

By: kafleen

kafleen — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 01:08:00 +0000

Snurt! That’s exactlee wutt I thot, too!

By: cweenmj

cweenmj — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 01:05:53 +0000

X-spouzez
Yappee liddle dogz
Z

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 00:56:31 +0000

many tnks fer teh reference, wich we will add to teh librry at d’Beaker Laboratories. pending its arrival, do yew know if it mentions purring in the binturong? they is int viverridae, along wif teh meerkats and mongooses (mongeeses too). i wunce herd one purr, or it sounded like it to me.

By: Cottleston Pie

Cottleston Pie — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 00:05:17 +0000

Used car salesmen
Vlad the Impaler
Whiny people

By: Feelionophiliac

Feelionophiliac — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 23:51:26 +0000

Rejektz frum humanity
Stoopy trollz
Too-self-impawtent peepz
U…

By: Feelionophiliac

Feelionophiliac — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 23:47:26 +0000

It myte b a bit absolutist 2 saa taht tigerz do nawt purr. Tehy maa nawt maak a “true purr” wif teh vybrashunz kontinyoouslee wyle breefing in n owt, but teh resent artikul (Peters, G. Purring and similar vocalizations in mammals. Mammal Review, v32, Dec. 2002: 245-271.) sed taht tehy maak a “purr-lyke sownd” wen breefing owt, whitch iz prolly wut teh folkz wuz heering n feeling.
Ai didunt tink taht teh folkz wryting abowt teh awesum tiger purr were maaking it up.

By: sweepea

sweepea — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 23:44:52 +0000

N -ergizer bunnee
Oateeoz frum teh hellth fud stoar
Pralinez wif pekanz (cuz if day stayz in teh houwze, i will eatz awl ob dem)
“Q” frum star trek nex genrashun
R…

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 23:24:02 +0000

snoffle

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 23:22:53 +0000

kkk and its relytives
low-burger trolls
mai big backlog of oberdue stuff
…

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 23:21:33 +0000

My grandpa was editor of Syracuse paper and he wuz frens wid Walt Kelly (who was a crank old coot dat dint like kids). I hab a hand drawn and colored framed panel wid a complete Pogo cartoon and in it is the pram wid my grandpa’s name It says ‘SS Voorhees’ onna side and ‘Good Ole Bob’ onna transom. Pogo invented LOLspeak as fer as I’m concernt.

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 23:16:26 +0000

Really ders annuder POGO fan inna werld? Ise so Happy. We must breed before become extinct. Um Axually Esther might take a dim view of dat, nemme mind