Comments on: To you, Animal Planet.

By: IzInUrInternetz

IzInUrInternetz — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 04:50:01 +0000

if lolcatz haded a showz theree b showz lyke Glazzbuzter(I dndnt du eet) n frid eyce frid mizce.(a fud shows.) N Happehclowncat(Intortaanmentment showz)

By: gremlin

gremlin — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 18:04:31 +0000

Aw, P d’B – thanx! Verree sweet/sad storeh. I will giv it to mah sister.

They is maykin sum progress – teh Ceeling Cat is at leest tawking to mah sister nao.

Imagin that – I haz a sister with a direkt lien to Ceeling Cat! Enny speschul rekwests ennywun wuld liek me to pass along for mah sister to shayr?

By: dpeddy

dpeddy — Sat, 29 Mar 2008 04:09:35 +0000

Thanks PdeB -
very cool and sad.

dpeddy

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 05:10:18 +0000

I would like to give this poem to your sister, and to her ceiling cat. It is by the great Polish poet Wislawa Szymborska.
.
There are lots of poems about our experience of the death of the pets that we love. This is about their experience of the death of their people.
.
It is beautiful.
.
Cat in an Empty Apartment
by Wislawa Szymborska
.

Die – you can’t do that to a cat.
Since what can a cat do
in an empty apartment?
Climb the walls?
Rub up against the furniture?
Nothing seems different here,
but nothing is the same.
Nothing has been moved,
but there’s more space.
And at nighttime no lamps are lit.
.
Footsteps on the staircase,
but they’re new ones.
The hand that puts fish on the saucer
has changed, too.
.
Something doesn’t start
at its usual time.
Something doesn’t happen
as it should.
Someone was always, always here,
then suddenly disappeared
and stubbornly stays disappeared.
.
Every closet has been examined.
Every shelf has been explored.
Excavations under the carpet turned up nothing.
A commandment was even broken,
papers scattered everywhere.
What remains to be done.
Just sleep and wait.
.
Just wait till he turns up,
just let him show his face.
Will he ever get a lesson
on what not to do to a cat.
Sidle toward him
as if unwilling
and ever so slow
on visibly offended paws,
and no leaps or squeals
at least to start.

By: gremlin

gremlin — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 20:49:19 +0000

HA HA HA – sawree, culdint halp mahself.

Mah sister is tryin to udopt teh kitteh uv a long-tiem frend hoo just died. Kitteh haz been livvin in teh heeting duks uv teh hows. Mah sister goes an tries to maek frenz wif it.

Yesterday, she tole me teh kitteh (known to her as “Boots”) is nao livin in teh CEELING. It cums to teh hole in teh ceeling an luks down an tawks to her frum ther.

She duz nawt hang owt on ICHC. But she haz startid to kall teh kitteh – git this –
CEELING CAT!!!! BWA-ha-ha-ha! I bowt fell owta mah chayr when I red her e-mayl.

By: CheshireKittehKat

CheshireKittehKat — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 19:18:02 +0000

Yess indeedie, ICHC iz fraught wif DAYNJURE!

Sumtymes Ai catches maiseylfe taukyng to mai fambly iyn semi-LOLCAT speak;
furdermoar, Ai can has thots iyn LOLCAT az weyl, iyf Ai doan wautchit!

Troolly, teh lanscaype of ICHC can has be jes loadedd wif boobie-trapses:
barbbed wyre-barruls ov laffs adn moawntins ov scents ov hyoomur.

Ttryck iz to geyt aroun awl ov dese poatenshul nihilators wifaowt havvin too menny gygantick splortses, dereby cauzing uninitiated peeps to fink Ai haz taiken leaf ov mai seynses, purminently.

By: turtlol

turtlol — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 18:00:01 +0000

mai kittehs awlwaz has odd naymz. Squit (grrl kitteh) and Snert
(boikitteh) wich were funnee, but dey knowed dere own naymes!
Dey bowf obber Rainbow Bridge naow, but dey were berry gud kittehs.

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 17:33:42 +0000

did yer plummer by n-y chance hab a big mustache and prowtruding teefs? was him maybe a little bit oberweight? wuz hims hands big and flat? jst wonderin …

By: Phillipe d'Beaker

Phillipe d'Beaker — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 17:31:46 +0000

snerk!

By: wiiing

wiiing — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 16:29:07 +0000

b kynd 2 yer frenz in da treez,
where the breezes go whippin pass der knees…

By: wiiing

wiiing — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 16:26:26 +0000

mai kitteh waches animul plannet. don like goggie showz, like teh bugz showz, leaves teh room wen commershuls come on. Takes notes on tigger hunting tekneeke, does not liek closeups of lionz and baks away.

By: wiiing

wiiing — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 16:21:17 +0000

yesturdey, said to mah plummer: “My cleanouts, let me show you dem.” an den he sez “you have a bukkit?” an I start senselessly laffin, he din not unerstan.

By: wiiing

wiiing — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 16:12:57 +0000

cuz we wuz bizzy lolchannelsurfin…. scuzeme.

By: gremlin

gremlin — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 16:01:20 +0000

An I furgot sum:
Fuzzbukkit (wun uv mah fayvrits)
Furfaec
Meowzer

But then agin, duz enny uv us reelee no owr kitteh’s Wun Troo Naem?
Prolly nawt . . .

By: gremlin

gremlin — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 11:50:24 +0000

Hao imbarrisin, but we did teh saym thing wit owr kitteh. He wuz:
Grem, Gremmin, Gremlin, Gremlikin-baybee-burger Breth (or just “teh Burger” fur short), “Q” teh Qat, Puss, Gremmy, Gremlin Bates (frum when he slashed teh shower kurtin as a kitn), an offin, just “G” . . . And wun uv mah frenz kalled him “teh cat frum h*ll” bekuz he attakked ebberybuddee but meh.
I diddn haf to see if he’d cum if I kalled eech naym – if I wuz ennywharz in teh hows, he wuz neggst to meh, wit sum part uv himz bodeh tuchin meh. Sumtiems a paw, sumtiems just teh tayl. Mah boyfren sed we even started to luk alyk frum bein togethur so mush!

By: gremlin

gremlin — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 11:42:55 +0000

Yoo noes yoo is addiktikayted to ICHC when . . .

Yoo starts ritin yor shoppin list in lol-speek.

By: 3heathens

3heathens — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 10:26:38 +0000

The Chayrman FTW!

Ai lubs the nu chayrman – he kin do bakflips an ebberyting!! Him seemz bery funneh, tu!

By: 3heathens

3heathens — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 10:20:58 +0000

Mai hubbeh duz this wif teh heethens – hubbeh holds up hands, wigglols fingurz an sez: “meet mah frenz ‘Tickle an Pickle’!” den proseeds wif teh tikklin! He duzzint uz the glubs, doh…

By: SolnEsther

SolnEsther — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 09:16:30 +0000

Muh son’s nawt sekkind kitteh were a floofy widdle tiny unit
but ver ver fysteh so son named teh kitteh Emily Dickens. As tyme went bye becamed appar…apare… obv… oviu… WTF!!1!! clear dat name were wrong.
So we jes called him ‘Kitteh Big Bawlz’

By: Tidmum

Tidmum — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 08:25:18 +0000

Mai Kittehz habs menne naymes tew.
Hazel am Hazelmouse, Mazle, Tiddin/ Tidmouse, Fatty Golightly,Cylindercat,Flat cat, Blimp…..
Fern can be ,Ferny, Beans, Budderbeans, Frillynikkerz, Frillybum, Tinybeans…
.
Mai nayberz muss fink ai gotz elebenty kittehz wen ai cawllin awl deez naymez!!

By: s.t.e.n.d.

s.t.e.n.d. — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 07:31:15 +0000

tonight on mutual of omaha’s wild kingdom, light french sauces which go well with endangered species. I’ll just stay in the chopper while jim goes in for a closer look…

By: altosinger

altosinger — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 07:03:33 +0000

Yewl bee sorreh butt ur teers wil bee tew laet!

By: stephanie

stephanie — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 06:29:20 +0000

oh noes! i wondar iff hoomans haff evolvd kittehs to bee slo-mo? bekoss we want dem to bee moar liek hooman? wif slo-fud and teevee addikshun? O_O

By: experiment 626

experiment 626 — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 05:17:03 +0000

oakay ur seekrut iz sayf wif us
wink wink
nudge nudge

By: TUKKZ'Z MOMA

TUKKZ'Z MOMA — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 05:01:08 +0000

Iz okai, mai kittehs don hab tu B 2 fass 2 kech tehir fud. “science diet” seez 2 it taht it laiz still in da boll til tehy noms it. hahahaha

By: stephanie

stephanie — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 04:59:31 +0000

hmmm… exsellint poynt! i gets hdtv for teh kittehs and see if dey can has cowchpotattoburger. ^_^

By: zippee!!!

zippee!!! — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 04:55:46 +0000

iam in yer brayn fuxing wiff yer languish…

By: zippee!!!

zippee!!! — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 04:48:59 +0000

eat more lolz!

By: zippee!!!

zippee!!! — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 04:42:51 +0000

I usta cawl my naught-first son: andy-pandy-pie-pie-nikki-no-meeno-dom-barko. Ore juss pi-pi, 4 short. Hez juss az accent-trick as hiz nayme. {{{{pi-pi}}}}}

By: zippee!!!

zippee!!! — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 04:40:04 +0000

tickel-tort-chair: donut wunt!

By: zippee!!!

zippee!!! — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 04:26:44 +0000

B kynd 2 yer fyne-feddered frenz,
4 a byrd may B sumbunnies muvver…

By: Eric

Eric — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 03:43:57 +0000

Ai r on yoar sofuh, watchin my fine fethered fuds.

By: Tessie

Tessie — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 03:18:00 +0000

Like vintaj horror moovies 4 hoomins wif jyant ants, jyant spydurs, an stuff like that? Could have kleeshay dialog, 2:

1 Kitteh: Wut iz dat?
2 Kitteh: It looks lyk a fether, Sargent.
1 Kitteh: Wel, shur, looks lyk, but iz wai 2 big. I meenz, 4 a fether 2 B that big, teh burd wuld have to be…

[kittehs look at each uther with horrified X-pression]

2 Kitteh: No. It CUDNT be!
1 Kitteh: THINK, Lootenant! That big futprint we saw…
2 Kitteh: An all doze sunflower seedz…
Both: Oh… my… God.

By: markalvin

markalvin — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 03:08:36 +0000

this photo reminds me of my cat…”ang sungkaban sa pagkaon” (it forages my food)

By: kiwican

kiwican — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 02:59:24 +0000

wunce, wen I libbed in teh unibersitte dorm, wii haz had a kitteh named:
Bacchus Oliver Fang Finocchio Muggins McKenzie Hodge
Himz names kaem fum menny peeps on teh 4th floor dorm. Wen I tukked him hoem, mai
dad kalled him Irving!

By: lolcatburglar

lolcatburglar — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 02:42:25 +0000

Don’t ferget teh helmet, 2!

By: greasycat

greasycat — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 02:32:48 +0000

I tink it’s their eyes is 2 fast. Dey can see faster than de lines of resolution display. In analog picture dere be about 486 lines, but in noo tv de aspect radio so much different. Hooman eyes slow so we don’t see de changes. (used to be a videotape engineer in a tv station in young life, long ago and far away). Heard dat kittehs CAN sees HDTV.

By: Shna

Shna — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 02:31:41 +0000

Ai finkz ai duz dat to meh dotter sometiemz – but ai nebur thot uv teh glubs an teh bootz. Das gud ideeuh.

By: Shna

Shna — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 02:30:06 +0000

Ai joos to hab kitteh frend (sweet sweet kitteh nao in kitteh hebbin) hoo wud krowch on teh top uv teh small teevee wehn hyoomins wuz watchin hockee & she wud chays teh puck arownd on teh skreen & smak it gud! She also liekd to watch bayseball & wud smak teh ball den too.
*sniff* Ai stil missez her – meh sweet littul kitteh wif teh too menny naemz.
Nina, La Gatita, Concentida, Cleocatra, Donna-O-Catter, Tightropewalker, Little Miss Mouse, Ty-PHOOOOOON
Bery bery big naem fur a bery bery small byootiful calico kitteh (naem too kawmplikaetd to spel in lolspeak).

By: lolcatburglar

lolcatburglar — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 02:27:14 +0000

Oooh! I’ll has one of those, 2. kthxhic

By: Shna

Shna — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 02:22:41 +0000

Dun an dun!

Ai finks ai will hav a Bayleez n Kawfee… wif sum vanila powdur. Maibee sum kahlua.

By: lolcatburglar

lolcatburglar — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 01:44:08 +0000

Ok, we no shoot u.
.
We just tickle u until u pee.
.
*Puts on tickle glubs and boots*

By: Shna

Shna — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 01:29:08 +0000

Vanished (agin – hoep nevur happenz to ur kittehs)
Wut Nawt to Warez
X-Filez
Yo Gabba Gabba (agin fur teh kittenz)
Zoey 101 (plz spay or nootur ur petz)

By: stephanie

stephanie — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 01:27:31 +0000

u kno, i heerd kitteh braynz is too fass for teevee. all dey sees is lite dott zumings akross skreen in a lyne. teh vizyual prossessings is has dis spede to trax and katch wee kronchies. iff kitteh can has teevee wotchings liek hooman, it meen dat kitteh is slo-braynz an probly is less gud at huntings.

no choot de messangur. juss wot i heerd!

By: PwnedBy2Kittehs

PwnedBy2Kittehs — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 01:24:11 +0000

Sleepink wif teh kittehs
Toonces’ Driving 101
Untouchables
V . . .

By: lolcatburglar

lolcatburglar — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 01:23:02 +0000

Martooni? Yes plz. Sumfin hot to drink? Yes, plz. Hot choklit martooni, mabye?

By: Shna

Shna — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 01:20:05 +0000

Sew U Fink U Can Dans
Twennyfoar
Unner a Shaydee Tree

By: PwnedBy2Kittehs

PwnedBy2Kittehs — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 01:19:21 +0000

Iz okai, Shna – wii wuz awl noo wunce. Yoo doan haz to do aneefing yoo doan wanna arownd heer, an itz all gud. Sum ov us lists dans stepz, sum ov us doan. Sum dans steps ar reel dances (yoo shuld see Maus’ waltzes – dey’s beyoootifullll!), but moast, wii makes up jes to haf fun wif. Wii lubs yoo wedder yoo danz or nawt. Itz teh cheezpeep wai.

By: cweenmj

cweenmj — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 01:15:59 +0000

Pairakeet Channel
Quest 4 deh hidey plais
Robotik kitteh toyz
S . .

By: Shna

Shna — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 01:09:37 +0000

Ai dint cuz Iz shy… an dint no if ai wul haff to list teh dans stepz.

Martooni or sumfin hot to drink, LCB?