Ceiling Cat guides the
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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
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Cheezburger Network Blog
And on the third day Ceiling Cat saiz “Let there be cheezburgrs!”
…And teh cheezburgerz shall have NO PICKLZ!
Foar picklz iz abommy-nayshun unto kitteh’s gestive systemz.
and NO UNYINZ! kitteh’s do not want unyin bref.
—speshully wif toona. (Toona-unyin bref is teh pleh.)
yea, but it tasets soooo gud….
Troo, if u liek unyins. Mah hubby duz! I oanly liek dem cookd.
O hai altosinger, Ai lykes ur naym. Iz relevant 2 mai intrists.
Ai bin singin alto sins ai wuz 7…dat’s a looong time, an ai’m not tellin HOW long!
i lieks yr name tu. iz relevant tu mai teachin. Iz soprino singer, tho.
Cantate
Me 2, mai partnur is an altosinger! A bery gud 1.
Lettus kompromize an get a side uv unyun rings. Then anybody who wants one can… kareful! They’re hot!
[owie]
MMMmmm…
No Unyinz?? Waaaaa!
Sum kittehz lurvz teh unyinz, n picklz, n lettus, n tomaato… (dis kud b a lawng list!) tingz dat udder kittehs tink r teh pleh!
4 meh: mmmmmmmmmmmmm! Nom, nom, nom!
Teh onlee trik iz 2 hab yur sweetee eet sum 2! Den no wun karez abowt bref, n u kan njoy teh deelishush fudz(!) n smootching teh sweetee!
wutt a sneekee twik, Feeli!
Dats wut I du, tu! Nise tu know Im nawt alone~!
Ware’s Shera (kitteh vet) to remind us dat onions r bad fur real kittehs?
Shera waz alwais there to halp us b better slaves to our kittehs. And, she alwais did it in a nice way.
Shera…ware iz u?
*putts on teh pretteh littul Shera mask*
Um, grapes bee bad too!
/runs off
Ancient Xristian myth says wen Satan left Garden garlic arose in hez left footyprint, an onion in de right footyprint.
An dat is why onion an garlic are poisson to higher lifeferms lik kettehs.
yes, she DID doo it in a nice way.
Yes!! Yoo red mai mind. Ai wuz just wondering where Shera (kitteh vet) is. I noticed, wunz, taht when ai asked fur sumwun, they wud suddenlee appeer.
Ai thot fur a wile taht iz wuz mai powerful majik – but – purrhaps they ar just lurking beucuz they ar too bizzy to jump in, and they tehy see they ar missed. So they appear.
Cud bee.
I’m going wif ur powerful majik.
Dere is no dout in my mynd that HanetCanHas4Kittehs alzo has reely relly powerfull majik. Skeery grate, ackshully!
Yu oar inspiring, JanetCanHas4Kitteh!
erk! I meen *J*anetCanHas4Kittehs.
I needs sum Ceiling Cat guidance foar my hand!
:red:
oops! uv kors I meent
nawt :red:
Hooboi!
am-nommy-nayshun
Ai gots am-nommy-nayshun fur a Okscar. Let me show you it.
‘kay:))
Congradumacashuns megritz!!!
Wut can wii dew to sellabrating ur kwikknesses?
i’ll take foar cheezburgerz, plz
Gud idea!! Cheezburgerz 4 ebbery1!!!
yew want friez wif dat? uv corse yew do.
And a sody-pop? cumming up.
Dees iz homemade burgerz & friez. All made to order, so yew
each gettingz exacery wut u wanting.
Wii haz plenty of deh toppingz–
picklez, onyunz, lettus, extra cheez, catsup, musterd, howsumeber
yu b wanting it, thatz wut u getz.
Nummy!
Wut dans r we doin? Sumfin liek Pomp n Syrcumstans?
O hai, megritz. Niyce to see yoo way up thar. An – celebratoreee cheezburgerz!!! Wai dint we ebber think ov this befoar!!1!
Ai luvs teh cheezburgerz – so – ai’ll happilee munch this wun down fur YOO!!!
Nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom. Yum!!!!
Okthx, but i prefer wun of me to da cheezburgrs rite naow.
doesn’t look like the ceiling cat papercraft?
http://www.boingboing.net/2008/03/13/papercraft-ceilingca.html
WANT! But i no has printer =(
that’s what’s kinko’s is for !!!
Wun ob mai frenz hab dis paper kut-owt instawlld undur a shelf in der offis. Wuns itz putted togedder, it lukz a liddel liek a kitteh head lukking down, but u get wut u payz 4.
*snerk*
Ai wanna put dis up in teh breezeway/porch uv mai howse…dere haz bin a ladee walkin into howsez arownd heer iffen she fyndz a dor unlokt, en teh breezway duzzent hav a dor dat loks…maybee hav a syne dat sez “ceiling cat is watching you” so iffen dat ladee cums heer she wil b lyke “ohnoes” en not try to get in teh howse. Or at leest it wil b teh phunnee fr teh noozpaypr boy.
Sounds laik a gud idea to meee. *snikur*
I’m thinking “animated ceiling cat” for haloween
An wen tehm Jerhover’s Witlesses comz rown, u juss poynt up an sai “S’OK, am alreddy cuvvered, thxbai!”
It will be the first bible i ever read cover to cover XD
Eben all teh funneh naems?
Anom to dat, Allen.
Amen?
an awl teh hoo begats wich cats?
witchcatz? dere b witchcats? Duz u meen deh catz dat travel wif
teh witchez? or catz dat b witchez?
Mmm wichy catz ar gud fun. Wicheez luvs dere kittahs, troo.
i meend “whoo begat whom” lists ob endless geneology
ahh teh peddy greez.
do kitteh care about peddy greez? ai wish to know.
Tehy carez moar taht tehy r feeded gud, tehy cares not for teh relidjun ov teh hyoomin. An sum ov teh wytchees luvs tehr kittehs moar tehn teh non-wychees.
.
A goggie sez: “Teh hyoomin gibs mee gushiefud, an taeks teh poops
wehn wee goez wawkees (or at least damned well better!), an skritches meh… He (She) must bee Gawd.”
.
But teh kitteh sez: “Teh hyoomin gibs mee gushiefud, an taeks teh poops frum my litturzboks, an skritches meh… Ai must bee Gawd.”
tehy cares bout teh petty greez
)
dey noes dey alredy haz petty greez cause dey cats.
Cantate
Sumbodee gonna get mad an not like dis, Butt I say pleh to dem.
Cuz u noe wutt? Menneh peepul wutt nebbur wud wunna reed teh Bibul an mebbeh misses owt on sum good stuffs will see it now.
Here be joke furr u No-Humor Trolls:
An old religious Kitteh was hungree, so vereh hungreh.
She pray too God furr foods. She get hungrier an and hungrier an get louder an lowder wiff her pleedee prayurs!
Sum nawtee kittehs walkin by her cottage an heer her cryin plees. Dem littul eers go back an dey say wiff nawtee glee: “Let’s play a trick an throw sum gooshie foods down teh chimbley an makes her tink is frum Ceelin Cat!!”
So dey did.
Well, u nebbur HERD such a racket! Dose nawtee kittehs lissunned wiff glee wile reelijus kitteh howled and thanked Ceeling Cat furr him ansur too hur prayurs!!!
Den dem ol nawtee kittehs scratched on door an she ansurred an dem say all sarkasmikul: “Haha! Dat not Ceeling Cat, u crazy ol Cat! Dat wus Uzzums!”
An she gabe dem dat “U big stoopy” look an say, “Oh, hunneh, teh Ceeleeng Cat SENT it, ebbbun if teh Cellar Cat DID fetch it!!!”
I wuds reed it iffs it waz ritten liek dat.
Let’s put ur hoofs togedder fur Kafleen.
Or paws, iffs dat’s awl u gots.
*muffled claps frum sawftee paws*
Aw, tanks
an ai ad mai *muffled claps from floofy whyte paws* too!!!
*smoo*Janet
luks like wee shoed inklude dis in teh parablols.
Mary, has I ebbur tole u I lub u?
I doo.
<3 M.O.S.
happi St. Patrix dai to ebbrybuddy. Dun 4get to wair teh green tomorrrrrrow. espeshully mayweeo sweepea
yes, wooden wanta gets pinched, datz wai i wearz teh grn ice.
i aer nawt irsh (moselee the skottish & fronsch in teh heinz 57 mix) but eberybodee getz to be Irsh toodae!
ritebakacha, kafleen!
Happeh St. Padrix Dai frum meh 2 joo awl!! Lurves teh Irishes stuff.. n awl teh Cheezfrenz… :-*
me 2, Allen. not so grayt, akshullee…Ai needz 2 reed mor.
ai 2…
den, mah hubbie iz a skolar… i uze him az mah can-corndans. iz vrry usful.
peas!
Grate use foar a hubbie! Wut a lukkie hubbie he iz, den, tu habs such a clebber wife liek yu!
Thou shalt purrvide me with Nip an Gushifud.
Caturday iz teh Day ob Play.
and on Holee Caturday awl teh hyoomins shall work ceaselessly on purr-fectin teh LOLcats fur our enjoimint.
Cause in bible it says “and teh ceiling cat wuz liek “looks kittehs, u must watch da hoomans cuz tey sometimes evils, so purrs at dem untils they settle downs, k?”
Aw!
lubely clebberness, Allen!
An each day un2 teh yooniverse, kittehs will hav teh Day of Rest. They will kontemplate important stuff by sitting in a Cat Loaf wif all 4 paws tuckt in and eyes skwinched shut.
and thuslee shall dey be in teh prezzents of ceilingcat, and shall dey see kitteh eturnatee, whilst still on erf.
An teh vast multitoods shall bring unto them teh loaves and teh fishes.
speshully teh fishes!
“An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, the Urfs, I has it, An I has not eated it.30 For evry createded stufs tehre are the fuudz, to the burdies, teh creepiez, An teh mooes, so tehre. It happen. Iz good.”
Genesis Lolspeak Bible
on teh firs dai ceiling cat sed let tehr be sun fur to lai in. and tehr was sun and it was gud.
on teh seknd dai ceiling cat sed turn off teh sun nao, ai wants to caterwaul, so teh sun was turnd off an it waz gud.
on teh thurd dai ceiling cat sed makes teh othr animuls evn teh dog for tu hav somfin to chais, an tehr wer othr animuls an it waz gud.
on teh forf dai ceiling cat napped. and all teh animuls luked at ceiling cat napping and thot about wakin him up but he flashd his pointy ends at them an they lef him lone and he napped on.
on teh fif dai ceiling cat sed let tehr be hoomins to make teh cheezburgers an teh gooshie fud and fur teh pettins, an tehr wer hoomins an it was gud.
on caturday ceiling cat eated of teh cheezburgers and teh gushy fud and purred.
on teh sebenth dai ceiling cat sed, ohai ebryone, ai furgots to mak teh lan fur all of us to be on, so let tehr be lan. and tehr was lan an it was gud.
kthxbai
LoLGenesis!!!
fank yu!
Much win and awsum, Whiskers!
WIN, mah fren!
yu guyz iz al so wunnerful! ai luvz yu!
An awl tihs wiffowt posable thums! Lettuce breeng gushifud an bow be4 himz!
fanks, whiskers! Dis is wunderful! and wonderfull!
Awesomz, dont eatz teh forbiden cheezburger!
Oh, noes!!! *skwintee eyes….* wutt bee dis furbiddun cheezburgur?
strickly speekin, awl cheezburgrz iz forbidded, that’s why dey so much fun!!!!!11!
Awl Cheezburgerz iz 4biddun? Wut kind uv heresee iz this?
De Ol’ Testmint b kosher, c. So de Jooish kittehs no b eatin de meate
n darees in saem meal.
oh. I feelz sorry 4 demz. Cheezburgerz shud B listed
az deh fud frum deh godz. I neber cud unnerstanding
y sum peeps haz awl deh roolz 4 teh eetingz. Oar ozzer roolz
4 stuffs, like deh no dansing. I B teh aetheist.
I beleef in habbing uv deh funz.
Funz iz teh ulteemate gud. Jus aks kittehs, they will tell joo.
Play-to cat sez: Gud laff, pleez!
Kittehz just want 2 hav fun.
ah sillillies! d orunj ones is forbidden!
doo “Substitute American Pasteurized Cheez Fud Product” cownt az daree?
Kuz it shurr as S aynt cheez!!
PS: Doant fogrot teh seprut dishees foar meets an darees (moar orfodox)
cheez / burgur
dat bedderer?
Mebbe (cheese) (burger) <– on separate plates
clebber, boom!
Wuttebber Kitteh
seez, beelawngz 2 eevurr he
or she!… Unnurrstandz?
Cheezburgr shalt nawt
beez cookd less tahn Meedee~um
Rayr. Dat’z Kitteh Law!
Peetza iz awllso
a deelishuss tribbyoot, but
Kitteh keepz t3h Bawkz!
Awll Bagz awn t3h Floar
arz fayr gaym. Kitteh needz sum
Cassillz 2 attakk!
Jack.
Furtha proof dat LOLcats have run out of funny
munkee – yoo ar rong. It’z getting funnier alla da tiem!!
I agreez. Maybee yoo is teh won hoo has runn outta funn.
So menny kindz ob funny here—-cee phileep d. Beeker’s comint—ICHC brings a smile 2 my fase! Ebbry day!
Ur post, u mean?
Sum peepul, wen tehy see wondrous natchural byootee, see onlee teh munneez tehy kud maak exployting it in sum waa.
Sum peepz, wen tehy see a liddul behbeh, see onlee a helplus, yuslus mowf 2 feed.
Sum trollz, wen tehy see a kyoot exampul uv sweet, trusting interaktshun between teh kitteh an itz hoomin staff, (whitch natshuralee bringz a smyle 2 teh faas uv a cheezpeep) iz disapoynted bkuz it nawt ROFLMAOOMG funneh.
*sigh*
Wen u hab 2 eksplaan sumting liek dis, der izzunt mutch poynt, so 2 doo.
Ai haz to agree wif FPhiliac. We noes — ai thinks — there is all kinds of funneez. All degrees of humooor. Sum is ROFLMAOOMG funnee. Sum is snerk-snorflle funnee. Sum is jest cyoot. Sum is eben sad. Yes, sad pichers taht is also funnee. Trolls mebbe canawt figger this out.
So, when teh cheezpeeps gets they hanz … pawz… whateber … on the picher, that is when teh fun beginz.
Me, speeking stricly fer mice elf, ai likes this picher.
kthxbai
Fanks, Feelinophile. Ai feels sad too wen sum trollypersun goes poop on teh nise funnee conber-sayshun. But if it helps dere paw trolly stress-lebbels, ai says SO BE IT.
Letz smile at teh trolls n maek dem go wai.
http://icanhascheezburger.wordpress.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_lol.gif
http://icanhascheezburger.wordpress.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_lol.gif
Ai lieks dis picher,2—an sum fokes don unnerstan taht CC has senz ob hoomer—ebber luk at teh platypuss? Or us, widout cloes,wen we be past 40…
Oh, noe!! Do not b lukking at us who am past 40 wif no clotheses on.
Wii wudn’t 2 B skeering deh kidz!! (or enny1 else 4 taht matter.)
Past 40, mah butt.
Try passt 8.
Um….ennyboddee into teh sacred feminine? (rollee pollee wimmuns….LOL)
Yes pleez! :raise hand:
I lieks mukcsles, but also admyres teh rollee-polleeness.
Mai say-kred wimmins…let me show you dem.
:bows down in admeerayshun of femimininim… wimmunz:
yu meen yur but is pas 40??? (sry cudnt help it.)
loves teh sacred femenin.
Mah but iz past 50! (An so iz teh rest ob meh…!)
My but is alzo past 50, but my braynes are octogenarianated by minny minny too minny St Paddy’s days sell a brashuns!
Given the DNA in mai fambly, rolee polee is a “when”, not an “if”.
*raises rollee pollee feminin paw in teh air~
Agreez! U cuud goez BLYND!
I fink we who am past 40 wif no clothes on oar de moat beeyootiful!
erk! Mo*s*t beeyootiful, uv corss I meent.
~
wait!
I know wuts going on! When my braynes got packed back in after teh earlier exsplortation event, sum got into teh rong plas.
~~
*grab nudge*
*move pack*
dere, nao let’s see wut happens. I fink it’s because I hab to akshully du sum uvver-english werk tudai, which messes up mai chezespeek.
I fink u luk at Lolcat Bibel, u see Ceiling Cat makes hoomins wit invisable
clothses.
Teh trolls, deh alweys b wid u….
like cellulite an hartburn.
hai, janet.
oh, mebbe gud plas foar a list, so tu eencorporate yurs:
~ahem~
artichokes
bebbeh kittehs (we hopes!)
cellulite
*steps out of LOLCat-land*
munky –
God laughs. (S)He must have a sense of humor, if you need proof just look at a naked human. Or a platypus. Or that Emu a couple pictures back.
.
We consider it a virtue if a person can laugh at themselves. If God has all virtues, this must be one of them.
.
We laugh WITH, not AT.
.
Peace be with you.
.
*steps back into of LOLCat-land*
.
Loox lyke SUMbuddy needs a kitteh snorgle!!!
Mayhap I merely prefer my LOLCats secular and atheist.
Just as I prefer my LOLSpeak to be somewhat funny and not mere mispelled babytalk.
As for being a troll, you all need to head down to the A Life Shop and Get One – I’ve been a poster on this site – with much funny – for some time past; that I haven’t contributed recently makes me more a lurker than a troll methinks.
As to ‘God’, meh – okay if you want to believe that, but don’t force it into areas where it doesn’t belong.
What hue and cry there would be if the caption was ‘Prophet Cat prefers you write Allah’s final revelation on lamb shoulder blade bones’ – not least of course from the more humourless sectors of the religious world; yes, you, Mr Taliban, we’re talking about you…
Never knew that Ceiling Cat was a Jebus freak – I prefer my LOLCats funny and disrespectful and agnostic.
Remember, every time you kill a kitten, god masturbates…
nice, munky is a cynic. thx for sharing. :rollseyes:
um, just sayin, but i thought this was pretty disrespectful! that’s why i lieks it
PS Have five kittehz, so snorgling not a problem…
I donut thinkz so, but if yoo donut like it, maybe yoo should go do sumthing that you DO like.
I donut no where this Ceiling Cat lives, but I’m gessing it’z sumware cold. I haz almost never seen sutch thick, plush fur.
Luks a liddle liek dis kitteh. I lub teh shape ov teh bebeh kitteh in teh pic.
.
http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/2008/01/11/funny-pictures-i-is-proud-now-find-real-mouse/#comments
yeah, Romeow, dis won ob my favs. I lubs teh capshun, 2. Berry gud.
sew kyoot!! eye saybed tihz pikchewer sum tiem aggo fur 2 keip amung mai favritz!
awsum kapshun!
wai kyoot kittehz!
wuntz 2 snorgul the bebbeh sew mush!!
Oh, Colleen! Dat’s teh sweetest ebbur! Tanks fur posting!
/<3s Romeow!
Mah Injeh kitteh luks lyke deh ceeleng cat in dis pictoor but herz ar oranj
She haz deh same patterns and plush fuzzy furz and sockzes on dem pawzes
I kannot find tha link. Iz it the picture ov the stocki, sturdi little grey kitteh hoo cawt tha catnip mouse?
Ai sorree. Taht linkee wuz kuberd ober bai teh slydee bar. Kud sumwun re-post it so ai kud yuz it? Plz? Purrtee Plz?
Iffn it iz teh Mommeh kitteh likking hur behbeh, telling himz sheez prowd, now get a reel mows, ai LURVZ that wun!
That’s teh one! Iffs u can’t see teh link, u can type “proud” in teh search box and it will cum up. Dat’s hao I finded it.
*ponders furry cat deeity*
This bringz us 2 teh deeep feelologikal questshun:
Iz dere also a Floor Cat hoo libbs in a naught-cold plase? whut kinda furr duz s/he hab?
:wicked:
Oh Noes the Lucyfurrs!
iz a spheenx, boviouslee.
kittehs allws bleev tehy in teh rite, so no need fur floor cat.
Da way I seez it. If yous reed the LozBible and it makes u saiz “Hey, dis Ceeling Cat, he nice, I guesses.” then lolzBible do itz job. Jus like realz Bibble.
wii R teh hands ob ceeling cat—bringing his/hurr goodniss 2 urff. (an opening cans ob gushi fuds 4 kittehz)—-wiff R ‘posable fumbs.
Wif a gud conscience our onwee sure reward,
wif history teh final judge ov our deeds,
let us go forth to lead teh land we lub (ICHC),
asking Kitteh’s blessing and Kitteh’s halp,
but knowing dat heer on earff Ceiling Cat’s work must trooly be our own.
It’s teh last line of JFK’s Inaugural Address 1961.
If ai has a submishin fur teh Lolcats Bibul, hoo doo ai send it too?
Tere is a Ceiling Cat, so tere haz to be a Floor Cat, rite? He probly haz teh blakest blak furrs wif red eyz. Floor Cat haz gots teh 666 on himself sumwares, too. Dats how u noes he is teh Floor Cat. But nawt all kittehs wif blak furrs is ebil, most is very gud. Teh Floor Cat is ebil, hee dont look owt fur teh kittehs liek Ceiling Cat duz. He look owt fur himselfs. He eateded all teh taysteeist an goodest fud.
Teh link iz poasted under teh pikshur.
Cellar Cat iz teh evil. Wee iz on teh floor. Teh vykinks kald it Midgard… in teh middul… between Cellar an Ceiling.
Purrhaps Floor Cat iz not eebil, but manifests (pawifests) eebil impulses of kittehs, like bringing haf-ded mangled baby burds into howse? I donut fink Floor Cat is blak kitteh, I fink he iz invizibibble, like when you find borked vase or poop outside of littabox… Floor Cat iz NOT THERE!
Or purrhaps Floor Cat iz virtyoous, but rulez over bad karma for eebil peeple, those hoo treet kittehs badly (I sure HOPE there’s bad karma in store for them!).
Theologee razes sum interesting kwestchuns, duzzn’t it?
me tink not Floor Cat but Basement Cat. We iz all on da floor wen we iz not on da counterz or da bookshelves.
I feels sorry furr dem wutt not unnurstanns teh symbolism ub Ceeling Cat and all teh uddur metaphors.
agnostic kitteh sez “i no noes n u no noes either!!1!!” Sez LOLcat bibul ritten by hoomans….agnostic kitteh sez no flood, just sink clogged!!11!! Agnostic kitteh snarl off 2 post on richarddawkins.net….
Iz it teh LOLBible or teh BibLOL? Mah tu kittehs iz havings relijus argumint abowt it. We iz havings feeline hloly warz.
Hololy Feline Wars, Wolverine Girl!!!
ceiling cat has the cutest little paws
Shouldn’t that be “Biblol”?
Dat is wot mi kitteh Charleh Teh Wunder Cat thinkz. Mi uther kitteh Professor Chaos disagrese.
The cat looks like one of the two cats my family used to have when i was just a little girl<3
iz celing cat in disguis, becuas looks difrent from reel celing cat (http://icanhascheezburger.com/2008/02/13/funny-pictures-ceiling-cat-creates-man/)
or maiby is proffet for celing cat. plz clearif… cralif… expln, becuas us followrz of celing cat ar naow confuzzled.
Ceiling cat appearz to beleefers in manneh diffurrent formz.
True beleefers doez not question deh wisdum of ceiling cat.
This part need alcaps. I hold shif kee for u.
I can has feline inspiration?
http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/View.aspx?ciid=833258
hey my cat looks just like yours!!!