Sabotage Kitteh…
u doan want a babee brother. rly.
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: Gidgie
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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
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Cheezburger Network Blog
Oohz noez, hims steelin mai condamintz
congratz geeneezcats!
no condomnation of the kitteh… but he doezn’t kno what hez gettin into!!
I iz afeered to ask wut kind uv sellebrashun goez wif dis.
um… maybee a snake charmur dans?
*using my nooly akwired skillz*
Oh, dat cud be berry interesting. . .
Wii needz to finding a floot player.
I iz habbing da skillz, but Icanhashazardpai!?
Mebbe we does contra dans….??
LOLZZZ !!! Ai dint get it teh furst tiem!!! ROFL!!!
Missy – taht is teh bestest comment I hab seen todai!!!
(I lieks teh contra danz, but moar ob teh PG kindz!)
You’re begging for trouble with “what hez gettin into”
Werez kin Ai hied dis fing?
congradulashuns! clever comets.
Whut berree straynge seezonings yew am yoozin. *snerk*
haow duz ketshup pakkets give yu bruthers?
oh wayt,
dat duzn’t luuk lyek mayo pakkets- oar uther fast food pakkits…
:blush:
i can only wonders
wut the care trolls will have to say about THIS wun
Oh no, this is OUTRAGEOUS
the poor cat could eat the package
and choke on the latex
I am vet tech and have seen this
happen many times
You should see the complications that can arise
PEOPLE YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL about what you
let your cats have access to.
: How was my care troll imitation?
*pikks up mask, trais it on*
These are not toys! Kittys should be given them to play with – imagine how bad you’d feel if you came home to your poor kitty, who unknowingly put that THING over its head!!! You would die of the emabarassment, wouldn’t you? Not to mention your poor kitty. SHAME ON YOU!!
*drops mask*
*walks awai slowly, whistleing*
My eyez is tired — I read, “irritashun!”
Heck iffn it keepz dem care-trolls off MY bodeh, I dun care!
Wayte!! Wayte!! Ai noes!! cSmall – yoo haz inspired mee. Iz kitteh verhsun ov teh CHRG(w/doi)!!!
*Ahem*
Luk down a coupla commints…
pooh kitteh doze not need concatsephunz
since huminz tooked awayz hiz harblz
No, kitteh! Dats NOT how you makes a CHRG (wdoi)!
Akshully himz making a balloon to rubz on himz baby brudder
and have himz furz stand up.
win! i had teh brayn freez on dis wun…
Me too. I stared at that pic for what seemed like an hour. Cold medication: Needs, but does not want! Pleh!
*pat pat pat* sowy.
Oh – darn. Yoo were alreddee there, Maus. Ai shudda known! *sigh* Ai shud remember waht Teho said. Fur an ongoing thred, he alwaiz starts at teh bottom an reeds up – so this can’t happen!! But – LOLZ eneway!!!
y’know akshuly… dat onlys troo if i hasnt alredy comentid ins it. ifs i has den yooshly i paeg-serch for “teho” so i can keep trak of teh conversayshins beter.
LMMFAO…that spermicidal lubricant tastes reallllly bad, so kitty will be droppin’ that lil’ foil package real fast!
U noes diz fura fack? Hau?
*wishes ai had JCH4K to tell me hao to maek the smilee wif teh BIG eyez heer…*
ummm you mite want the : shock : (put teh colonz on bof sides,squished togedder)
* Puts on GH(wP) *
Type “: shock :”, but without the spaces between the colons and the word.
fanks maus & mary-o!
ai feel bettur nao.
oooohh kan ai tries ?????
oh hey…….dat was teh fun….my furst ebber yellow fase !!!!
.
.
whater sum moar ???? huh ? huh? huh?
.
boi ai iz gettin teh puter nowelj awl obber teh plaise….noaw ai can spases a line, an maek teh bug eeyed fase….whoooo hooooo !!!
won ob my favrites is : roll :
liek dis?
OH NOES!!
My eyez!!
U hab blinded my *mind’s* eyez!!!
howd u do dat????? dat’s wun ov mi faborites !!!!!
wif de 8 and de ) mooshed togevvr just so:
also if U mouz over de smiley it tellz you what it iz.
fanks, DD, ai givvs u elebenty bazillion burgers for dat if ai cud!
oo ai wants to trai toooo!
:8):
ok wunce moer:
:8D:
me sad!
Urz has a flavr?
how do dat,
Yeah, an it is pleh! Kitteh must taek mah wurd on this.
Dere be kitteh fud flabored condimintz?
“I no undurstahnd.
Dis sez ‘Ultruh Plehzur’, so
whai it taist like pleh?”
cuz it “Ultra Pleh” flavr – sayz so rite on pakij!
Win.
An yoo noes whut teh regyulayshuns sez – yoo must list teh ingreedyuns in teh order in which they appears. Since Pleh is listed furst, this item must be *mostly* maed uv pleh!
I think I will abstain from comment
yup.
tis teh onlee 100% safe thing to do in dis sichuwashion.
Saving yourself for marriage, eh?
r u catlick?
no de catliks NOT use de pertekshuns ya know
cuz evry sperm iz sacred!
MP win!!
howevvur… b/c do doo nawt yuse teh condomints, dey sumetimes do the abst-, absta- …. wut RD sed.
uh, I ment to say, ‘dey doo’…
mai typing skillz…let me show u mai lack of tehm.
an we awl noes jest how wel dat werks !!!!
(nowt reeli teh bestest fase fur taht …but is onli wun ai noes…..so itll hav to do…..
jest about as guud as “teh rithum meffod” anodder populur but in effekshual meffod ov teh BC…..
.
(kan u telz mi daddy waz teh obstinatrishun????
.
meet teh larj caffolic famblies in teh nayburhood wher ai growed up……
well I shoulda said MOST catliks — cuz I was rayzd catlick and dere is me n my two brudders, only us 3… so dis cauzed pepuls mush confuzn when i did tell dem I only had de two bruddrs n was catlik. course i frm Cajun Contrys so deres plenty beeg famlees down here!
I was jk DD… we knoes not all catliks are teh same.. sum strictur tehn othurs..just liek most othur relige-ions.
Salleh doez ur daddeh prescribe teh azpirin? Az in, hold won between ur neez?
oh I KNOWS u was jokin, but on nutther hand i knows it so true! and also knows dat cajun catliks also are less dogmatik den som other kinds. sometimes. but i didn’t lern till few years ago why i only gots 2 brudders — cuz dr say no more after #3, so even in catlik dogma if momma’s health is concerned u can be has perteckshun. I was meanin i meant to put it in mai post abov dese.
Mi momma an dadda hab ten uv us. Dadda say “we be usin teh rythum method, obviously neether wun ub us can carree a toon ina bukkit!!” Den hiz nex joe wuz awayz “We so prowd uv dees kidz we mite getz marreed sum dai” Oh teh caflic hyumor… gib me a drink!
don’t look a gift horse in the mouth
Trojans = gift horse FTW!
ar Pittypat iz teh brillyunz purrsonified!!
also don PUT de gift horz in teh mouf! cuz it full of pleh (az we haf alredy establishd).
Mom! Dad! I didn’t know you were coming! Oh yeah, this is my new cat….Precious what have you got there???
Ai dunno, Ai gotz it owt ob Ur wallett!
oh it nu toy, crinkly and chewy but da flavr is PLEH!
Dat’s nawt were da GOOD bebeh brudderz come frum, kitteh.
Da GOOD wunz comez frum da sheltur!
Kitteh disagrees.
Hoomans bestest brothers, ‘cuz
they have gooshifoods.
No, hoomins r survants. Dere onlee funkshun iz 2 feed da kittehs, pet da kittehs and cleen da litterboxz. Hoomins r onlee needed becawz kittehs do nawt possess opposable thums.
In mai howse, hoomin is also rekwired to turn on teh fawcett for teh kitteh to get teh fresh waterz.
Yes.. ai am a kitteh survent.
U has abviuslee been trayned well.
Mai kitteh no drink from da fawcett, but hur waterz comes frum da plastick jug. (We has nasty waterz from da fawcett.)
if u can beleeve it.. ai evun boughtted a speshul kitteh water fowntin for mai kittehs… they did not want! want only teh fresh sink waterz.
yes… ai am well trayned.
u interested in slitely used kitteh water fowntin?
Nom nom nom…whai dis tayst liek rubbar?
Side story:
There is a small community near where I grew up called “Troy”. My friend & I were driving around that area once and we passed “Trojan Farm”. My friend did the Beavis & Butthead laugh and pointed at the sign. I said, “Yeah, that’s where they grow them!” She said, “Huh”? I said, “Haven’t you ever heard of RUBBER TREES?”
It took her a minute to figure out I was joking! LOL
True story, I promise!
..heddesk…
What do kittehs do with condoms?
Use them as body bags for mice.
How com kitteh knows wher da bebbeh comes frum? Berry modren parintz! Mah kitteh finks dey come frum da cabbidge patch!
Um . . . but they *duz* come frum da cabbidge patch – rite?
*luks arownd, awl confuzzled*
Dat’s rite—pay no ‘tenshun to dis pikshur! And urly in da mornin, da vet c oms an piks dem an bringses dem to ur momma in his (or her) liddul blak bag!
*turns head, whispurrs* an if u bleev day, i gottsa bridg wid a biew ob Bruklin…i sell it to u, cheep!
oops–shudda sed bleev dat, not day
Ah bleeves yoo bowt teh blak bag! See storeh below!
????? Ai thot so, too??? Teh stork brings tehm to teh cabbidge patch, rite?? An putz tehm under teh cabbidge leaf. . .
How elze cud it bee??? (bee?? burd??? hmmmmm)
hee hee hee
Troo storeh: Mah 3 oldist sisturs wuz born at hoem. They wuz 2 yeerz apart eech: furst sistur, then 2 yeers, negxt sistur, then 2 yeers, then thurd behbeh.
Doktor wit beeg blak bag wuz in attenduns eech tiem. Third tiem, the beegest sistur watched doktor cum in, go into closed-up room, then beh-beh arryved. She watched suspishuslee.
Smardypants beegest sistur (nao 4 yrs old) asked – wuzzint doktor gowing to taek teh behbeh alawng wit heem when he left?
i thoughts it wuz that the burds and beez had sex togehter and then !surprise! babies!
rite?
if i promises 2 wears this,
will you not do teh nooter to me?
next i plays frisbee wit yer di-a-fram
“Dis iz last tiem i buyz dis brand of choowing gum…what teh hell kinda flavur wuz taht spost to be?”
as a pastor, I am for contraceptive devices, but as a person I am against kitties
den whatcha doin on ICHC is yuz aginzt kittehs?
Specks postmodernpastor is teezin…revrse ub whad uzually iz sed.
Specks postmodernpastor means he be against young kittehs (ob any speeshees) having unproteckted seks. Kreeates too many unwanted, unfed, unkared-for kitties (ob any speeshees).
shoulda added
cuz I knows de pastor playin
Iz AIDS worker kitteh, working in Africa
Stressing importance of ABC’s
(to da toon ob “bring Bak mah Bonneh to Meh)
Mai mudder she maks profylaktix
She punchurz de enz wif a pin
Mai fadder hez an obstatrishun
o-oh how da munny rollz in
FTW!!!!!! Brava!!!!!!
da first rool of caturday nite, No balloons No party
prepared kitteh will not be suppryzed by teh buttseks
oh I finks evvyone bees surpizd by de buttseks even if dey is prepared — sumtimz good surprizd, sometimes… well u know
Dis kind of acshun oftun leeds to feetul error.
Ron Jeremy Cat
usez humon-sized condums
is liek “ewwww…..LOL…ewww…..LOL…etc…”
espeshully when u knows normal kitteh size… :shocked:
ratz!
mebbe work dis time?
Thats why I always buy cat food AND condoms at the same time. Though it does get me some funny looks.