abort! abort!
it’s a cylon attack! BSG reference FTW
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: G
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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
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Cheezburger Network Blog
Oh noes! Itz spidlolzilla!
congradulashuns!
EEEEKK!!1!
Ai fru mai shuu at mai compuuterz (iz OK, nuttin broke!)
Jesus Christ, it’s a spider! Get in the shuttle!
Uh, Huston, we haz a problem. Did ennywun remember to pak teh eggstra-big can uv Raid?
NASA announced a temporary delay in the launch of the space shuttle due to the unanticipated arrival of a gigantic spider which proceeded to envelope the shuttle in a silken cocoon, then spun an incredibly large web that covered the entire Cape Canaveral area. Thousands of people are reported to be stuck to the web, as the Enviromental Protection Agency continues to stall all efforts to destroy the invading spider and destroy its web; the EPA cites concerns that the spider is a newly discovered species that warrants further studies. The astronauts trapped in the cocoon-enshrouded shuttle report report limited visibility.
UPDATE: Shuttle crew, led by Captain James T. Kirk, used its lasers to blast through and melt the thick, silken cocoon which had ensanred the space shuttle and launch tower. The lasers were then targeted onto the rapidly approaching spider, and, as the gigantic arachnid proceeded to demonstrate further hostile intentions, the Captain Kirk ordered the lasers be fired, quickly destroying the rampaging spider. (some readers will recall that an actor who strongly resembles Capt. Kirk – William Shatner – starred in a movie about an invasion of deadly spiders).
Although NASA ’s Mission Control maintained that the launch should be further delayed while large pieces of spider debris be removed from the launch tower area, Captain Kirk flipped the ignition switch, and the shuttle was successfully launched into space.
Meanwhile, while thousands of human residents remain stuck to the vast spider web left behind from the now-dispatched spider, the EPA maintains that the gigantic arachnid is now an endangered species, and its home-enviroment should be left intact.
ooooo could you write in Gary Seven in the next epysoad? He’s kinda kewl and he has dat kat!
i can has Terri Garr role?
Okay – we puts you in Terri Garr role.
Have added small but important role to Space Shuttle adventure: female astronaut, brilliant, beautiful and Hot, sits next to space shuttle commander (Captain….whut uwz it??? Kirk???). Orbital manuevers ensue.
Can not find anyone to fit the character description of female astronaut. Will have to kast myself into the role….
oh. i thots you mite.
Wuz ther an orinj kitteh in this storee? Liek meh, furrinstince?
*pushes fuzzeh orinj faec into kamra*
Ohai! I can haz mah close-up nao?
*annownser voyce frum off kamra* “Toon in nekxt tiem fur . . . Kittehs in Spayce!
i liek komment piramidz almost az much az i liek spyderz ^_^
OF CORSE there be a beautiful orange kitteh in de shuttle story!!!!! (Hey, I’m Cookie’s Human!!!!!!! Cookie be a beautiful orange kitteh!!!!!) The beautiful and hot female astronaut had brought Little Tiny Cookie on to the space shuttle with her as part of da NASA Catz in Spaze program. In this story, when da shuttle was being enveloped in da silky cocoon of death, Cookie wuz intently watching the spider’s movement on one of da moniters, and rapidly batting at the skreen wid her paws. It be kitteh’s way of showing concern for imminent danger. And Cookie always be readdy for her Kamera klose-ups.
Jeezez krist it’s a spider! Get OUT of the shuttle!!
sew diz am teh reezult ob habbin a Whirld Wyred Web!!??
A hole noo consept!! D
dis am teh spydur taht S kaypt frum teh bafftub fred!!
eye awlwaiz hab hewj spydurz in mai tub!!
but happilee noe shuttulz – az tehy wud leev naztee skorch mawx rown teh plug-hoal!!
eeder dat or it’s teh cause of teh Whirled Wyde Web
The Araknoyd Aleeyns hab invaded…
call in Godzilla kitteh to pounze onnit!
“Why can’t it be ‘follow teh budderfliez’?”
oops. shudda put dis sumware’s elz.
hairy potty ref FTW!!!!11!!!
Ohai, MaryO – we haz a tie!
Let us dantz teh tarantella togethur!
*taeks spidery step to teh left*
*taeks spidery step to teh rite*
Luks a bit liek teh tiem wahp! I can has pelvic thrust?
Yay! i lubs a tarantellah!
♪
(taranchulas, nawt so much. prefurs to admire dare purtikular kinda byutee frum a distance.)
Tarantella is wun ob mai fayvritist pomes!
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/tarantella/
Yu carnt halp but go fasteranfaster wen yu reed it – go awn; trai!
you win. cudn’t do it wifout goin fasterandfasterand faster
Till u gets to teh end. Den it gets kinda slow an sad. Gud pome, tho. Fanks, Ambercat
doez u move all ate legs at the same tiem?
I think whut aym doing iz a speschul mash-up vershun uv teh tiem warp an teh tarantella.
I tries to tarantella wit awl ate legs at wunz. Aym warping! Aym tarantelling! Heer goes!
*falls down in a twisted heep*
Um, mah dantzing wuz nawt so grayt ackshully!
so just ate steps to teh left… and ate steps to teh riiiiiiite
U can do it Gremlin!!
Just put sum stikee web stuff on yur feets!
OR, we cud do teh hokee pokee:
U put yur left footz in
U put yur left footz in
U put yur left footz in
U put yur left footz in
U put yur left footz in
U put yur left footz in
U put yur left footz in
U put yur left footz in…..
Lurves it!!!1! FTW Hooraeee fer leeza-b
fanks! *blush*
sumtimez ai cant thing of ennything to sai
and sumtimez ai thinkz of too much…
Um, leeza-b –
Which wun is mah left futs?
Oh, mah *uther* left! OK, nao, I gots it!
Ai noo that u cud!
And after teh dans, maybee a nice frendlee game of Twister?
*whispurrs* Hai, leeza-b. Ai don’t think we’ve formallee met. Nice to cee you. Ai wanted to say – if yoo wants to do teh blushee face – do this : oops : an taek out the spayces.
Oo, fanks you!
No we haf nawt met, but ai am pleesed to meet u nao! I am sorta noo… ai have wanted 2 ask hao to du that but nawt wanted to intu- inti, ….butt in on conversayshun… ai hav seen u maek manee fun faces! blushee and teh devvil face… ai triez now:
it WERKS! fanks evvur so much!
wish ai cud stay and plai… but it’s tyme for me to leev werk and ai hav no intertubes as home rite nao….
*whispers*
maybee tomorrow u can show me teh devvil face….
O hai, gremlin!!! ai wud verree much to dans for yoo. An this luks liek lots ov fun.
so – we’re uzing awl ate legz – mooving ate stepz to teh left an tehn ate steps to the rite. If ai doo it in a sort ov grapevine thing, ai think ai can doo it.
Feet 1,3,5 & 7 – step, cross bak wif feet 2,4,6 & 8, repeet 7 moar tiems.
Yay – it’z werking!!!! Dans dans dans dans dans dans *tangle tangle tangle* *plop*
Oh, pooh! *waives up at gremlin* can yoo halp mee get untanlged a bit???
ai thot u and Gremlin wer doing a wunnerful tangle-o!
Hai Janet! I untangles yoo and lifts yoo up.
*lifts Janet over mah hed, spins, sets Janet down*
Whee! Nao, lets try that feets thing wun moar tiem:
Feet 1,3,5 & 7 – step, cross bak wif feet 2,4,6 & 8, repeet 7 moar tiems.
yue korry o’graffy skeelz, janet… wii pree c atez dem!
bedder than ateing all moving legz at teh same tiem.
the itsy bitsy spider crawled up the… shuttle? CUT!
Spidr iz wachzing shuddel lawnch…
…on teh web.
.
.
.
Arachnophobia?
let me show you mine. bai
fohbeeya – i haz it.
*shudder***
check!
Hey Gascat! Gud to see yu, has yu been alowd owt to plai?
as long as day dont *jump* at me shudder
Someone went to the Bert I. Gordon School of Special Effects (watch the MST3K episode, Beginning of the End, to witness giant grasshoppers climbing Chicago skyscrapers and walking into/onto the sky, indicating they were really walking on postcards of skyscrapers).
I lubs dat moofie. Berry much funz 2 see Chicago wifout da rilly big bildingz.
“Ev… Have you been hittin the booze again?”
Announcer [on movie soundtrack]: The giant preying mantis was shot down over New Jersey.
Tom Servo: Thereby improving TWO things!
Wuz wundurin if ehneewun els wud fink uv dat.
“Wut teh ‘I” stanz fr?”
“‘I em sew ashaymd’.”
I can has Ed Wood?
Dan Araknoyd just wants to go to space too!
Hedliens: Spyder frum Marz noms spayce shuddel.
Wuz nawt so gr8 ackshully. But teh story haz legz!
*Grownd controll to Majer Tom*
♫ where wur teh spiedurz when teh flyz tried to brek r harblz♫
:: safe place…. happy place…. safe place….. happy place… ::
maek de skeery spider go way nao plz? :: twitch twitch ::
Ai DO NOT WANT, sew ai thot it waz tyme to du sumfing els on mii computer. Sew……. I syned off adn started plaeing mii favrit gaym….. tehn ai notissed it waz Spider Solitaire!!! To quote Val Kilmer, “My hypocracy knows no bounds.” Ref??
…the last pichure on Harry’s (Larry’s brother) camera.
Who voted for this?
RUN FOR UR LIFES~!
IT is teh spider of DOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!1!
I am so scared of spiders…
Cape Canaveral can has teh Orkin man?
OT, and kynda nawt….shuttle lawnchuz tonite around 1am…guess that maykes it tumorow mornin eastern tyme….yew kan wach it life at nasa.gov…if yer up and spyydur is remuved by den.
Launch is set for 2:28 AM EDT.
Ai will trai 2 stai up 4 de lawnsch. Nite lawnsches ar MOZT spka -spelk -amayzin. Teh hoal skai lytez up, den SHOOM! goez shuttl. Frum heer we canz wats- wazch -see dem foar abowt ten minutesez. Ai will chek foar teh spyydurzez… do not want, awlso!
tank yew Mr. Webhampster.
Wii apprechiates ur attenshun tew deh detailz.
.
**mumblez to self: i iz in az. taht’s mountin time.
**mumblez: so 2:28 eestern minus 2 hrs iz 12:28;
**mumblez: but az duzn’t switch to daylite timez (ai wunderz y?)
**mumblez: so enyway dew i addz anuzzer hr? aor subtrakt an anuzzer hr?
**mumblez: i so confuzled.
**mumblez: hoo thot up this daelite savingz crap ennywae?
**mumblez: when sun cumz up — it’s daelite
**mumblez: when sun goez down — it’s dark.
**mumblez: yew can’t save daelite.
**mumblez: can’t put it in a jar.
**mumblez: can’t put it in a vault.
**walkz off still mumbling.
funny! yoo iz rite, 2. I redd teh udder day that Daylite Sabing Thymne hasn’t sabbed ennyfing–’lektrik billz, or udder stuffs.
i iz in az too. in dayliet savins time we iz teh saym az pafisic tiem. so iz eestern tiem minus 3 howrs.
(hafsta knoe dis for teh teebee showz, wen tehy are on)
OMG!
Tihs must be whut redhed & kitteh are watchin in the other lolcat.
I for one welkum hour new spydr overlordz.
I canz buhleeves you wuz frist to yooze that line !1!!!
I wuz lookin and lookin, and startin to thinkz I cud bez frist – I wuz gunna yooze:
And I, for one, welkum our new instekt (oops! strike thatz! iz araknoyd.) overlordz
oh this wun is killing me… itz a moovie quoat iznt it.. but wich moovie… pls?
Iz frum Simpsons ep where Homer iz astronaut. Ants xcape from ant farm an look reel big on camera lens. Kent Brokman finks they taking over an sez, I for wun welcome our new insect overlords.
i do not welkum teh spydr overlordz……i spends 2 muches tiem on teh web nao!!
Macy’s day parade balloon has aborted it’s misshuns and hampered the space shuttle launch!
http://www.wannasmile.com
“Some shuttle” is clearly visible in the web
Gaaah! Spidies!! We hate dems precious! We hates dems forever!!!
Ai yam wib yoo on dis DavecanhasDrTinycat!!
Mai dawter played wib a s.p.i.d.e.r. awl frew a meetin wib teh doctor todai.Ugghh.She tryed to put it awn me!!1!Arrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhh…..!
DO NOT WANT.EBBER!
3…….2……..1…….TICK OFF!
What the hell, this isn’t a cat, stop posting shit.
ratz, dis wun not on mah binglol card today.
hay be nise. wee iz habin fun, doan be mean.
make yr own LOLs and mebbe wee can looks at dem den. K?
we will when you will, troll.
Hoo’s that trip trapping uponz mai bridge?
IT DUZZUN’T HAff TOO BE A CAT U RASSIN FRASSIN SCHNASSIN TOILET MOUTHED BUTTPAIN JURKFACED TROLL!!!
*Donkee’s face turns crimson… Leaps into teh air and makes rapid fire donkee kicks in trolls direction! *
Go crawl back unner ur bridj an stay dere till u starts too smell!
Tehre arnt evah anee loltrollz, iz tehre? Wondah wye?
If I wuz bad, horribibble, EEEEeeevil, not very nice, person, I wud say get yr housemate or co-worker to look at picture, then very gently touch the back of his neck.
Good thing I’m too nice to ever suggest such an awful thing!
do NOT want. muss nabigayte awaeye from paige… eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
lolspider, lolspider, does whatever a lolspider does…
…what does a lolspider do, anyway?
EATS SPACE SHUTTLES, OF COURSE!!!
Apollo 9 Lunar Module wuz named Spider. Wuz flown in 1969. It not look liek dis spider tho.
Capricorn One — the sequel.
i lol’d moar at da BSG comment den da aktshual pic!
Please ’splain. BSG?
Battlestar Galactica! iz tv show, u shud watch it. iz awesome!
Charlolton Heston reealyz him stil awn Planit ob teh Spydurs…
“U maynee-arachs! U bloo it up! Dam u! Dam u awl 2 Nawt-So-Nys-Playc!”
Patrick – ai need teh link to yur blog. Ai thot ai had it bukmarked, but ai can’t find it.
Thankz.
Postcard from Shelob:
Ohai, Snaga,
Dis wut I did on mah Flolorida vacashum. Teh fud is nommy but teh packidging not so grate, ackshully.
I be bak at teh cave in 2 wks.
S.
Iz not Cylon, iz Shadow vessel! (B5 > BSG)
Why is this horrible picture here?
Contains cat = FAIL
Contains humor = FAIL
Contains things which should never be seen, and should be destroyed with extreme prejudice = I plead the 5th.
2nd most common phobia in the world = offensive to most people.
Oh, deer, grey kitten. wii r soooooo sry.
ur rite, der iz no kitteh heer,
but lotz of peeplez found humor.
I am not shur y u think teh space shuttle shud not b seen and shud destroyed wif (or eben wifout) prejuedishes. U haz a fude wif NASA?
I haz a phobia 2. I haz a grate feer uv peeps hoo b wanting to control uzzer peeps. howeber, I do not try to telling them wut 2 do. I usually just ignoring
dem. But I make an excepshun 4 u. I telling u: go wai.
Coming dis summa… Teh sequel to snakes on a plane!
lolshuttle
cnt tellz if ze spydr iz photadran in or if iz a tevalizion wif spydr on itz
iz ztll LOLish
OM NOM NOM NOM
Wun smal stepz fo’ spider…
Wun giant NOM fo’ araknid-kind!
.
“Huston, we haz LOL.”
.
Teh next movee in teh Flies Saga: Teh Grate Beasties Returnz!
.
I canz go on aaaaaall dai wif thees joks!