Iz onlee 6:00am heer in Alaskee! But pass dat martooni! Oar a margerreeta! Oar wuteber!

*singin*
Gib me tew peenya coladas,
Wun foar eech hann.
Set sayle wiff Captin Moargin,
Tho we nebber leeve dry lann.

*bows*
*blushes*
*runs awai!*

OMG Zippycat u in Alaskee! Nebber mind whut tyme eet iz, whut iz da temperchure? Wii iz havin da colde temps here in Mareeland. Lyke da teens at nite. Sew u guys muss rilli bee colde!

Ower wether is berry chanjabul! Ober the weeken, it wus warm and meltee, liek 38-40F. Yesserdai, it snowd liek 7 inchs and wus abowt 19F. Todai is onlee 2F! Soe yes, todai we ar bery colde, but if yoo had askd awn Mundai, I wud hab sed berry warm! Tee hee!

Teh Sun R obur teh yardarm sumwhayrez!

I can haz myne berry berry drai plz? (Tink HaukI & BJ in MASH sort ob drai)

Iz fore pee emm heer in Teeny Tiny Ingland, but in Paris Fronse, which is onlee a bery tinee distance awai, is 5pm! So ai tink we can awl be awn Fronch time an has teh martoonies. Le Cheers!

pee ess as is James Bond theme, we has Danyull Craig in his speedos servin teh drinks tudai. Pls to nawt be leaving teh stikky finger prints awn him.

paws4thot, wood u like dat martooni shaken, not sturrd?

SJ, eff wii leahve stikky finger printz awn Danyull Craig, can wii lick dem off? (PLZ)

Ob kors Tribble. U haz 2 haz broozzd spuritz in Wodka martooneez.

Ai wuds lyke lemmun drawp martoonie, pls. Kans bee servd bai DC, tu?

CSI Kitteh here. Let’s take it to the barn kidz. I awreddy see some sticckee fingerzprintz. I must inspect Daneel’s speedo more carefully. Perhaps dust for tung prints. I will needz assiztenz and to kwerstchun witnizez

Tung printz? U can do dat? Uh oh….. ai meen, nuffin, ai wusn’t eben IN teh nawty barn, ai wuz rite heer werkin bery bery hard.

*hidez martoonie glass in filing cabbynet*

we’ll need you to come with us SJ for some rooteen kwerstchuning. Would you mindz gibbing us a sample of yer DNA’s? Just so we kin eliminate you as a suspict.

Um…. ai lefted mai DNA at home tudai, so sry.

ok, then we will jes do the cabbity serch. Mr. Craig made some alluzshun to inappropriate oggling and paws in places dat madez him uncumfertible. You wouldn’t know anyfing bout dis wooja? The tung printz will be back frum teh lab shortly

teh tung printz iz back from teh lab and dey clears SJ, alltho we did find some of her bref behind Daneels ear. Looks laik dis one will be cold case soon. Daneel will hab to lib wiff de haunting memrees of teh oglin, though he did say dat teh pawses wuz kind of nice. No charjiz will be filed at dis taim and all may return to the barn for celebratory martoonees an chocolate covered speedos.

AWL mai ogglin wus TOADALLY propreeyut. NEwai, ai has had teh day frawm h3ll (ackshully ai has had teh week from h3ll) an I just fownd owt ai owes teh taxman a lotta munnies (which is unfair, ai wud spend dat munnies on mush bedder tings tahn the govermint will do - shoos f’rinstunss) so ai wud laik a bery BERY big martoonie plz. Shaken, stirred, ai duz nawt gibba dam.

bringz teh CCC to Nawty Barn stat! WE haz a man down! Needz IV drip of martoonee, Haz Daneel Carig standing by to fan teh pashent wiff ostreech feavers and sooth her furrowed brow gentlee wiff he masculin hanz. We will all drink heavily in support and comizerashun of our mutual dislaikeeness ub teh taxman. WE needz excessive amounts sticky sweet things and alkeehol

Teh taxman; teh car-repaymunt man; teh gasandelektrik man - tehy AWL wont owr munnees! Ai sai we hoel up heer in teh barn an drink teh martoonees an ogul teh Danyul Crayg, Yung Nekkid Gy, Kevin Sorbet an Fillinblankheer - but oenlee in a pro-pree-ate manner - until we fergets aawwwlll abowt it…..wotebber it wuz…errrr….moer martoonees enneewun?

addkittehz, wii can haz chocolte cuvered speedoez?! Ooh Boi! U tinkz wii cud keep sum on da CCC fur mergenciez? (Eye not zactlee sure wht kine uff mergencee wood kneed da chocolte cuvered speedoez, but wii can tink uff sumtin.)

‘CHOO!!! Watch wut ur doin wiv dose ostreech feavers, but keep soothin. Mai brow is still furrowed. An fank u Ambercat ai is still feelin bery week so ai will has anotter martoonie. An dus NE buddy has a choklit eclare bai NE chanss?

I fink Sj’s taxman induced colapse is zacklee teh kind uv Mergencee that requires teh chocolate covered speedo. If we gets consecus I finks keepin teh CCS’s on the CCC would be ape rope ree ate. I mean the CCC is now being ued fer all kinds of Mergencees wher ewe needs teh kindness an soothing supports

nawt to menshun alkyholl.

we drinks anover martoonee an tries to gnaw the chocolate covered speedo off teh Daneel Craig. Although i spect dat cood be vued as naperopereeate by sum

Dere is awlreddi mai tribbul choklit brawonies for cheerin peeps up (an for recovvri from Dementor attaks). I muss sai, teh choklit covvered speedoes souns a bit unhighgeenik. But whatever, in an emmergensy.

I persunnally feel in need ov a Catberries flake an a larj (not frozen, its 2 cold) margareeta.

Dammit. Teh stuff I misses.

*Wah!!!*

Ai fink tehr is a reel danger ai wud luk like Miss Piggy if ai did dat.

well, nowun ebber got teh bedderer ob Miss Piggy! Defnitly a wiganwings dai tomorrow!

An to maek yu feel still moer bedderer - Ai has a Bike brekfast at stoopy o’clok in the mornink tomorrow; Ai has to pertend Ai is awayk an happi an glad to be hangin arown teh byk sheds as teh chilluns arryv at skool, awn a coeld Janumary mornink. Ai lubs mai jawb, but sumtyms a rilly wunder wy!